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♪ When I was 17 It was a very good year ♪
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Niles! That's incredible.
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All day long with the butler act,
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and then this voice comes out of you?
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You got a real Jim Nabors/Gomer Pyle thing
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going on there.
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[IMITATES GOMER PYLE] Surprise! Surprise!
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[LAUGHING]
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Oh, don't make me laugh,
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I just hung up the phone from my sister, Nadine,
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you know, the caterer? Mm-hm.
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Her husband left her.
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Oh, dear.
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Oh, I'll tell you, it doesn't surprise me.
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Barry is the biggest lowlife, and I should know.
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I dated him for six months
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before Nadine stole him away from me.
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Miss Fine--
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Oh, and you know, if only there was a way
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that I can finagle her to come stay with us
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for a couple of days.
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I really owe her.
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I mean, we came from the same womb,
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but she was 13 pounds.
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After her, Mom was a water slide.
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Why do you think I have such a beautiful forehead?
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Miss Fine--
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You know, Niles, this party mix ain't bad,
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but I think you OD'd a little on the cinnamon.
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You're eating thepotpourri.
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Eh, it's fiber.
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Oh, this is the last thing I needed to see
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first thing in the morning.
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Well, why don't you stagger her work hours, sir?
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My main singer's dropped out of our backers' audition.
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Ohh.
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I can't believe he just left us in the lurch.
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Oh, well, why don't you use Niles?
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Niles?
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No, no, no, you misunderstood.
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He said, "Left us in the lurch,"
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not, "Get us Lurch."
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[CACKLING]
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[GROANS LIKE LURCH]
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Well, you know, I think you're missing a big opportunity here.
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But maybe I shouldn't open my mouth.
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Who knows if he'd even wanna do it?
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Yes, I do so love my work.
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Mr. Sheffield, he could've made a fortune with his voice,
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but instead, the man chose to serve you.
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He's not a smart man... but a very talented one.
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Oh, Miss Fine, do be serious.
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We need someone with a legit voice.
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♪And the world would be better for this...
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Someone who can emote.
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♪ That one man scorned and covered with stars... ♪
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Sell it to the back of the house.
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♪ Still strove with his last ounce of courage... ♪
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Sing out, Louise!
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♪ Who'll reach the unreachable... ♪
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♪ ...star ♪
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Oh, bravo!
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Oh, God. Maxwell, that was so good.
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Top 10 things she says alone in bed.
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[LAUGHS]
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Niles. Yeah?
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Perhaps you should take a look at the sheet music.
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Really?
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Oh, Mr. Sheffield, you know,
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I was just thinking,
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with Niles rehearsing your song,
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who's gonna do all the cooking?
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Well, you could help us out, Miss Fine.
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Oh, you know, I'd love to.
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But remember, this is me making Lipton's.
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Well, I suppose I'll just have to hire someone.
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Oh, no.
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A stranger with all the expensive stuff
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you got laying around here?
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I mean, the things I broke alone.
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Gee, if only one of us was related to a caterer...
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What? -Isn't your sister a caterer?
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Oh, Mr. Sheffield, you know,
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that's why I'm workin' foryou,
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[THEME MUSIC PLAYS]
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♪ She was workin' In a bridal shop ♪
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♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪
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♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪
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♪ In one of those Crushing scenes ♪
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♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪
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♪ She was out on her fanny ♪
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♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪
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♪ To the Sheffields' door ♪
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♪ She was there to sell makeup But the father saw more
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♪ She had style, she had flair She was there ♪
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♪ That's how she became The nanny ♪
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♪ Who would have guessed that the girl we described ♪
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♪ Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed? ♪
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♪ Now the father finds her beguiling ♪
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♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪
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♪ And the kids are actually smiling ♪
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♪ Such joie de vivre ♪
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♪ She's the lady in red ♪
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♪ When everybody else is wearing tan ♪
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♪ The flashy girl from Flushing ♪
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♪ The nanny named Fran ♪
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♪ Yah, yah, yah, yah, yai ♪
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♪ Yah, yah, yah, yah, yai yah, yah, yah ♪
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Oh, Niles, that's so beautiful.
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Gee, you know, if you put on a yarmulke,
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you could be a cantor at Temple Beth Shalom.
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Hey, Fran, what do you think of this blouse?
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Well, that depends.
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You planning on wearing it with a leather mini-skirt
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or just leggings? [LAUGHS]
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It's not for me.
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It's for a girl I like, it's her birthday.
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Well, B, this is see-through.
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Oh, man.
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I didn't even notice that. - Yeah, yeah.
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Can you believe that kid?
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Wanting to buy a see-through blouse for a little girl?
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Boy, that reminds me of my ex-boyfriend, Danny.
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Do you know for my birthday once
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he actually bought me a G-string?
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Oh, dear, how inappropriate.
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I'll tell you, if it wasn't my mother's birthday in two days,
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I'd still be stuck with it.
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[DOORBELL BUZZES]
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That's Nadine. [BUZZING CONTINUES]
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She's a leaner.
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Hi, angel.
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Hi, Nay.
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BOTH: Mwah!
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Oh, Nay, I'm so sorry about you and Barry busting up.
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Please, I'm fine.
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Does this disposal work?
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Yeah. Why?
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[GRINDING]
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Well, at least you've made peace with it.
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Come meet Niles, the butler.
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How do you do?
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I take pills. Oh.
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Niles, who does my sister look like?
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Um...your mother?
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Niles, doesn't she feel bad enough?
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[WHISPERS INDISTINCTLY]
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A pair of faucets?
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[SHOUTS] Farrah Fawcett!
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Ohh.
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Oh, yes, yes, it's remarkable.
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Everyone says that.
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Nay, come, sit down. I'm so happy that you're here.
154
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It's good you got to get away for a couple of days.
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I'm sure you're gonna miss the girls, though.
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Oh, they look like Barry.
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That makes it easier.
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Still, it must be hard on them.
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Mmm, divorce is tough.
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No, I mean because they're staying with Ma.
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[BOTH CACKLE]
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How did we make it out of there without turning into two yentas?
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BOTH: Ai, I tell ya.
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BOTH: ♪ It's fun to stay at the YMCA ♪
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♪ Yay ♪
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[LAUGHING]
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Those were the days, my friend.
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Oh, I thought they'd never end.
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Say, you know, Loehmann's got in that big shipment.
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Did you go over there on Thursday?
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No. I had a barbecue.
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I piled all of Barry's clothes outside his mother's house,
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and I set them on fire.
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Well, as long as you're not bitter.
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Barry and I stopped having sex two years ago.
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Do you know why?
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Because you had that thing on your stomach
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that needed to be drained?
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No. That didn't bother him.
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It was because he couldn't perform his animal husbandry.
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Yeah, well, that was because he was performing nightly
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with that trampy salesgirl from Wilson's House of Suede.
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What salesgirl?
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Nothing.
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Fran, make her give it back.
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What? Ow! You're hurting me.
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Oh, Fran, that could be us.
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No, you used to schlep me around by my nostrils.
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Oh.
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Ow!
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Stop it, stop it, stop it.
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What's the matter?
193
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Gracie stole my lipstick.
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No, I didn't.
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Fran, don't you think she's a little young
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to be wearing makeup?
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Don't you think she's a little young
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to let her boyfriend--
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You know what, Fran? I think I can handle this.
200
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All right, listen to me. I want you to be nicer to your sister.
201
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Because someday you may need an organ,
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and your brother has a different blood type.
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Come here. Look at me and Nay.
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Love you, angel. Give me a kidney.
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Take two.
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BOTH: Mwah!
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Oh, doesn't that just take you back?
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I remember you were always stealing my stuff.
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Nay, what are you doing with my sweater?
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My sweater.
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No, it's not.
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I remember you gave it to me.
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I did not.
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Did too. You liar.
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Now give that to me. No.
216
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Give it to me. It's mine.
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Oh, good.
218
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Okay, you win. Fine.
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Ow.
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[BOTH SQUABBLE]
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Into the pool.
222
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Stop it. You animal, you.
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Say uncle.
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Drop dead.
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I'll spit on you.
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Ma!
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Hi, girls.
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Did you work out your little problem?
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♪ I'm the greatest star ♪
230
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♪ I am by far ♪
231
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Take a bow, take it now!
232
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♪ But no one knows-- ♪
233
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Good morning.
234
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Niles, tea.
235
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Yes, I'd love some. My throat's a little dry.
236
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And, uh, throw in a sprig of mint.
237
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[LAUGHING] I'm not getting you tea.
238
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Well, I'm not singing in your show.
239
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Lemon?
240
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Yes. But we're out.
241
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Here's $10.
242
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Get a little rawhide chewy for yourself.
243
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It's okay, Nay.
244
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I didn't fill the bathtub up for me.
245
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Butch and Sundance might be coming by,
246
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and I thought they might wanna water their horses.
247
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I take it Eva and Zsa Zsa are not hitting it off?
248
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Oh, you know, Niles,
249
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my sister has always wanted everything that I've had -
250
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my clothes, my toys.
251
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Once I actually got a shag haircut
252
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just because I knew she'd look lousy in it.
253
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Took me 12 weeks to grow out, but she looked like Cousin Itt.
254
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Oh, I'll tell you, if she could, she wouldbe
255
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Oh, Miss Fine, I'm sure you're exaggerating.
256
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No, I'm not--
257
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Good morning, everyone.
258
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Good morning, Nadine.
259
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Would you like a freshly baked croissant?
260
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Ooh, that sounds fabu. Sure it's no trouble?
261
00:10:39,433 --> 00:10:41,350
Oh, not at all.
262
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When Miss Babcock comes back, I'll send her back out.
263
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Nay, maybe this wasn't such a good idea,
264
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you staying here, after all.
265
00:10:47,483 --> 00:10:49,166
What do you mean?
266
00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:50,483
I mean, maybe you should leave.
267
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,183
I don't understand.
268
00:10:53,216 --> 00:10:57,160
That's why you did so poorly on the$20,000 Pyramid,
269
00:10:57,500 --> 00:10:58,150
and Betty White wanted to punch you out.
270
00:11:00,830 --> 00:11:01,400
Why are you doing this to me?
271
00:11:01,433 --> 00:11:04,500
My husband is leaving me.
272
00:11:04,830 --> 00:11:07,250
Oh, Nay, relax. You'll find someone else.
273
00:11:07,283 --> 00:11:09,333
You can cook your way into the heart of any man.
274
00:11:09,366 --> 00:11:11,166
Easy for you to say.
275
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,116
You're so lucky.
276
00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:15,000
You're living like Elly May Clampett.
277
00:11:15,330 --> 00:11:17,383
You got a gorgeous guy.
278
00:11:17,416 --> 00:11:19,350
I do? Where? Where?
279
00:11:19,383 --> 00:11:20,266
Good morning, ladies.
280
00:11:22,330 --> 00:11:23,350
Mr. Sheffield?
281
00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:26,000
He's my boss.
282
00:11:26,330 --> 00:11:28,133
So there's nothing going on between you and him?
283
00:11:28,166 --> 00:11:30,150
No.
284
00:11:30,183 --> 00:11:31,350
Then you don't mind if I go after him?
285
00:11:44,383 --> 00:11:47,500
Do I smellfarfalle e pesto?
286
00:11:47,830 --> 00:11:48,216
No. She don't come till Thursday.
287
00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:53,116
Mr. Sheffield, bubby, come here.
288
00:11:53,150 --> 00:11:54,500
Taste this.
289
00:11:59,183 --> 00:12:01,233
Mm. Mmm.
290
00:12:01,266 --> 00:12:03,483
Mmm-mm. Mmm!
291
00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:05,316
[CHUCKLES] It is good, isn't it? - Mm-hm.
292
00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:06,383
Oh! Oh. [SPITS]
293
00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:10,233
Miss Fine, is there something wrong?
294
00:12:10,266 --> 00:12:12,116
No, I'm sorry. It's just that I ate
295
00:12:12,150 --> 00:12:14,466
a really big piece ofFAT.
296
00:12:15,160 --> 00:12:17,300
That's where all the flavor is. [GIGGLES]
297
00:12:17,333 --> 00:12:19,330
What's the matter, Nay?
298
00:12:19,660 --> 00:12:23,330
Need to get that thing drained again?
299
00:12:23,330 --> 00:12:25,160
Keep an eye on my dumplings.
300
00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:26,266
I just wanna run up to my room.
301
00:12:26,300 --> 00:12:28,483
Mm-hm. My
302
00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:30,283
And by the way, your dumplings are down to your knees.
303
00:12:33,150 --> 00:12:35,450
Miss Fine, your sister is a wonderful cook.
304
00:12:35,483 --> 00:12:37,216
Where on earth have you been keeping her?
305
00:12:37,250 --> 00:12:39,233
In a jar with air holes on top.
306
00:12:41,350 --> 00:12:43,483
I beg your pardon?
307
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:45,333
Can't you see what she's doing?
308
00:12:45,366 --> 00:12:48,100
She is throwing herself at you.
309
00:12:48,133 --> 00:12:50,483
She's cooking for me.
310
00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:53,000
Yeah, well, nothin' says lovin' like something from the oven.
311
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:57,366
You're off your bloody rocker, you know that?
312
00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:59,200
Thank God, you're not operating heavy machinery.
313
00:12:59,233 --> 00:13:00,400
Mm-hm.
314
00:13:00,433 --> 00:13:01,216
Just raising my children.
315
00:13:03,166 --> 00:13:05,300
Oh, you know, Niles,
316
00:13:05,333 --> 00:13:09,133
there is something to be said for sibling riflery.
317
00:13:09,166 --> 00:13:10,416
You mean "rivalry," Miss Fine.
318
00:13:10,450 --> 00:13:12,116
No, I mean...
319
00:13:12,150 --> 00:13:14,160
[CLICKS TEETH] Boom!
320
00:13:24,450 --> 00:13:29,660
[HUMMING]
321
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:34,366
Whoa!
322
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,233
Nadine, is there something I can do for you?
323
00:13:39,266 --> 00:13:40,316
I thought you might want a little something
324
00:13:40,350 --> 00:13:41,216
to nibble on before bed.
325
00:13:45,133 --> 00:13:46,660
Good night, Mr. Sheffield.
326
00:13:46,100 --> 00:13:47,233
Good night, Nay.
327
00:13:47,266 --> 00:13:49,830
Nadine!
328
00:13:49,116 --> 00:13:51,350
I thought Mr. Sheffield might be hungry.
329
00:13:51,383 --> 00:13:52,233
Actually, I'm still quite full from dinner.
330
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,333
What? There's always room for Jell-O?
331
00:13:56,366 --> 00:13:59,466
How dare you come into my boss's room
332
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,183
dressed like you're over 30 and desperate.
333
00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:04,500
Here. Cover yourself up.
334
00:14:04,830 --> 00:14:08,316
Cover yourself up.
335
00:14:08,316 --> 00:14:09,233
Oh.
336
00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:13,330
There was a two-for-one sale.
337
00:14:14,466 --> 00:14:16,266
I have nothing to be ashamed of.
338
00:14:16,300 --> 00:14:18,366
I have a beautiful figure.
339
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:19,366
She's not the only one with a body for days.
340
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:21,216
Shh!
341
00:14:21,250 --> 00:14:24,216
Don't tell my boss I've got a body for days.
342
00:14:24,250 --> 00:14:25,333
He's not blind.
343
00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:28,483
Now, come on, let's go.
344
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:30,250
Let's go. - Hey, who you pushing?
345
00:14:30,283 --> 00:14:33,250
BOTH: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey... MAXWELL: Ladies, ladies.
346
00:14:33,283 --> 00:14:36,216
Ladies, can we take this outside or to a mud pit somewhere?
347
00:14:38,250 --> 00:14:40,316
Oh, need an extra pillow, sir?
348
00:14:43,116 --> 00:14:44,433
Good night, Niles.
349
00:14:44,466 --> 00:14:46,200
Well, you know, actually I'm not very tired.
350
00:14:46,233 --> 00:14:47,233
Good night, Niles.
351
00:14:49,350 --> 00:14:51,283
Now, would you excuse us?
352
00:14:51,316 --> 00:14:54,500
I'd like a moment alone with your sister, please.
353
00:14:54,830 --> 00:14:55,483
You heard him. Get out.
354
00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:58,150
I think he's talking to me, Nay.
355
00:14:58,183 --> 00:14:59,500
Right?
356
00:15:01,830 --> 00:15:03,116
Good night, Mr. Sheffield.
357
00:15:03,150 --> 00:15:05,330
If you want me, I'll be in my room.
358
00:15:05,660 --> 00:15:07,266
My
359
00:15:09,366 --> 00:15:11,416
Well, congratulations, Miss Fine.
360
00:15:11,450 --> 00:15:14,350
You were right about your sister.
361
00:15:14,383 --> 00:15:16,283
Is there anyone in your family who's not a raving lunatic?
362
00:15:16,316 --> 00:15:18,333
Hey!
363
00:15:18,366 --> 00:15:20,500
I'll have to get back to you on that one.
364
00:15:20,830 --> 00:15:22,660
Hey.
365
00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:24,660
You know, if she wasn't such a damn fine caterer,
366
00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:25,483
I'd throw her out before this backers' audition.
367
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:27,200
Gee, you know, this is the first time
368
00:15:27,233 --> 00:15:29,183
I've ever been in your bedroom.
369
00:15:29,216 --> 00:15:32,200
It's not at all as I imagined it to be.
370
00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:34,400
You got a whole James Bond Octopussy
371
00:15:36,316 --> 00:15:37,450
Get out.
372
00:15:37,483 --> 00:15:38,283
Bye.
373
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:49,160
[DOORBELL RINGING] ♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me ♪
374
00:15:49,500 --> 00:15:51,166
♪ Me, me, me, me, me ♪
375
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,266
Uh, who's gonna get the door?
376
00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:55,333
♪ You, you, you, you, you you, you, you, you ♪
377
00:15:56,483 --> 00:15:59,500
So, Niles, nervous?
378
00:15:59,830 --> 00:16:01,500
Oh, no, I look at this as a chance
379
00:16:01,830 --> 00:16:03,233
to fulfill the dream of a lifetime, sir.
380
00:16:03,266 --> 00:16:05,300
Oh, I hate backers' auditions.
381
00:16:05,333 --> 00:16:09,300
Ugh, so much pressure, so much riding on it,
382
00:16:09,333 --> 00:16:11,483
so many lives, so many jobs,
383
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,383
all depending on this one night.
384
00:16:15,283 --> 00:16:16,466
Well...
385
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:17,350
Take care, old man.
386
00:16:22,216 --> 00:16:25,133
You know, if Mommy knew
387
00:16:25,166 --> 00:16:27,483
the way her eldest daughter behaved last night,
388
00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:31,116
I'll tell you, she'd be so mortified,
389
00:16:31,150 --> 00:16:34,330
she would just pack her bags and move down to Florida.
390
00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:39,000
"Call Ma."
391
00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:44,283
I didn't know Mommy had two daughters.
392
00:16:44,316 --> 00:16:46,200
She was so busy pulling up your dress
393
00:16:46,233 --> 00:16:48,333
and showing off your thighs to everyone.
394
00:16:48,366 --> 00:16:50,330
This, you envied?
395
00:16:50,660 --> 00:16:52,333
To this day I can't wear a short dress.
396
00:16:54,383 --> 00:16:59,160
[DOORBELL BUZZING]
397
00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:00,316
[BUZZING CONTINUES] You called Barry?
398
00:17:00,350 --> 00:17:03,330
I had to, Nadine.
399
00:17:03,660 --> 00:17:05,233
It's time you go home and face your demons.
400
00:17:05,266 --> 00:17:07,500
Oh, nice thing to call your nieces.
401
00:17:07,830 --> 00:17:08,266
I didn't mean them. Although--
402
00:17:10,366 --> 00:17:11,316
Did somebody call for an air-conditioning repai--
403
00:17:13,830 --> 00:17:14,660
Fran?
404
00:17:15,250 --> 00:17:16,200
Nay.
405
00:17:17,216 --> 00:17:18,500
Bar.
406
00:17:20,133 --> 00:17:22,416
So...this is how I find you...
407
00:17:24,150 --> 00:17:25,316
in another man's kitchen.
408
00:17:25,350 --> 00:17:27,160
I'm getting paid!
409
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:28,116
There's a word for that.
410
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,366
Yeah, Barry, it's called "caterer."
411
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:34,183
Oh, yeah, her big career.
412
00:17:35,333 --> 00:17:37,250
You don't know what it used to be like.
413
00:17:37,283 --> 00:17:39,350
I got it every night.
414
00:17:39,383 --> 00:17:40,483
All right, all right. That's more than I needed to hear
415
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:41,383
about my brother-in-law.
416
00:17:43,383 --> 00:17:45,350
My wife is serving it up to half of Long Island,
417
00:17:45,383 --> 00:17:46,466
and I'm going hungry.
418
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,250
Buzz off.
419
00:17:48,283 --> 00:17:49,366
All right. You're talking.
420
00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:50,433
This is good.
421
00:17:50,466 --> 00:17:51,266
BOTH: Shut up.
422
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,166
All right, they're going into the backers' audition.
423
00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:56,100
This is bad!
424
00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:59,660
We're at the Act I curtain.
425
00:17:59,100 --> 00:18:02,660
It's a gorgeous ballad sung by Niles--
426
00:18:05,830 --> 00:18:06,830
Niles...
427
00:18:07,300 --> 00:18:09,150
Butler.
428
00:18:09,183 --> 00:18:10,483
Niles DeButler. Ladies and Gentlemen.
429
00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:12,100
[APPLAUSE]
430
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:19,830
[PLAYS PIANO]
431
00:18:19,116 --> 00:18:21,416
♪ Once in every man's lifetime ♪
432
00:18:21,450 --> 00:18:25,483
♪ Mystery and magic abound ♪
433
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:28,333
♪ Destiny finds and shows him ♪
434
00:18:28,366 --> 00:18:31,100
♪ True love has been ♪
435
00:18:31,133 --> 00:18:33,133
♪ Found ♪ - I never should've married you!
436
00:18:33,166 --> 00:18:35,100
♪ Once in a man's lifetime ♪
437
00:18:36,433 --> 00:18:38,216
♪ Romance and passion ♪ I don't ask for much!
438
00:18:38,250 --> 00:18:40,116
Pizza, a turkey... ♪ Unfold ♪
439
00:18:40,150 --> 00:18:41,233
[NILES CONTINUES SINGING]
440
00:18:41,266 --> 00:18:43,383
I'm sick of feeding your face, Barry.
441
00:18:43,416 --> 00:18:47,133
What do I get? - You two, shut up.
442
00:18:47,166 --> 00:18:49,350
Mr. Sheffield's out there with a bunch of rich people
443
00:18:49,383 --> 00:18:51,450
trying to shake 'em down.
444
00:18:51,483 --> 00:18:54,660
[NILES CONTINUES SINGING]
445
00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:56,100
♪ It's as pure and as simple ♪
446
00:18:56,133 --> 00:19:03,350
♪ As learning to follow my heart ♪
447
00:19:03,383 --> 00:19:04,416
♪ Oh, once in a lifetime ♪ Don't worry, Maxwell.
448
00:19:04,450 --> 00:19:06,400
I'll handle this quietly.
449
00:19:06,433 --> 00:19:08,333
[SHOUTS] Nanny Fine!
450
00:19:08,366 --> 00:19:10,483
♪ Could well be ♪
451
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:14,116
♪ That once in a lifetime feeling ♪
452
00:19:14,150 --> 00:19:18,100
♪ Has come over me ♪
453
00:19:18,133 --> 00:19:21,233
♪ That once in a lifetime feeling ♪
454
00:19:21,266 --> 00:19:29,160
♪ Has come over me ♪
455
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,316
Miss Fine, I am beyond words.
456
00:19:35,350 --> 00:19:37,483
This is the most outrageous, horrific,
457
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,000
unconscionable display.
458
00:19:41,330 --> 00:19:41,333
I thought you said you were beyond words.
459
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:44,233
Here, Maxwell, go for it.
460
00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:45,450
Club her big-haired head in!
461
00:19:47,283 --> 00:19:49,333
C.C., rich people out there.
462
00:19:49,366 --> 00:19:50,366
Don't let them leave.
463
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:51,283
Got ya.
464
00:19:54,830 --> 00:19:55,366
Excuse me, sir. How do you think it went?
465
00:19:58,116 --> 00:20:00,660
Didn't you notice Larry, Moe and Curly
466
00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:01,300
going on in the background?
467
00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:03,330
Well, yes, but... how was I?
468
00:20:05,266 --> 00:20:06,433
You were terrific, old man.
469
00:20:06,466 --> 00:20:07,366
We'll call you.
470
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:08,366
Yes!
471
00:20:11,330 --> 00:20:12,150
So this is the guy you're cooking for now?
472
00:20:14,330 --> 00:20:15,250
Barry Cooperman. How's it hangin'?
473
00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:18,250
Maxwell Sheffield. Not well.
474
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:23,660
Has he got an appetite as big as mine?
475
00:20:23,100 --> 00:20:26,500
No one's is, Barry.
476
00:20:26,830 --> 00:20:28,116
He's gotta have it four or five times a day.
477
00:20:28,150 --> 00:20:29,266
No, kidding.
478
00:20:29,300 --> 00:20:31,333
Boy, he's satisfied with
479
00:20:31,366 --> 00:20:32,466
just two poached eggs and a piece of toast.
480
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,183
That's it? Yeah.
481
00:20:35,216 --> 00:20:36,366
Then he just rolls over and goes to sleep.
482
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,166
[CHUCKLES]
483
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,830
Barry, don't be jealous
484
00:20:41,116 --> 00:20:43,133
because she's dishing it out to other men.
485
00:20:43,166 --> 00:20:45,330
There's plenty left over for you.
486
00:20:45,660 --> 00:20:46,433
And you, Nay,
487
00:20:46,466 --> 00:20:49,000
you want your man back,
488
00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:51,183
you gotta put it out for him - breakfast, lunch and dinner.
489
00:20:53,366 --> 00:20:55,266
And, uh...
490
00:20:55,300 --> 00:20:58,660
I miss my midnight snacks.
491
00:20:58,100 --> 00:21:01,383
Oh, Barry, I've been neglecting you.
492
00:21:01,416 --> 00:21:04,183
From now on, you'll get it any time you want
493
00:21:04,216 --> 00:21:05,350
right there on the kitchen table.
494
00:21:07,250 --> 00:21:09,350
Speaking of food,
495
00:21:09,383 --> 00:21:12,166
which I hope to God we're speaking of,
496
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,466
could we get some out there?
497
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:18,316
Of course, Mr. Sheffield, everything but my paté.
498
00:21:18,350 --> 00:21:20,000
That's for my husband.
499
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:23,500
Oh.
500
00:21:24,216 --> 00:21:25,400
Baby, that is good.
501
00:21:27,433 --> 00:21:29,416
Aww.
502
00:21:31,316 --> 00:21:33,333
I just gotta get a few things outta my room.
503
00:21:33,366 --> 00:21:36,830
My
504
00:21:37,483 --> 00:21:40,100
Maxwell, you're never gonna believe this.
505
00:21:40,133 --> 00:21:42,830
First, they hated Niles' song.
506
00:21:42,116 --> 00:21:43,350
I get to tell him.
507
00:21:43,383 --> 00:21:44,333
Second...
508
00:21:46,433 --> 00:21:48,283
they loved that whole comedy thing
509
00:21:48,316 --> 00:21:49,383
going on in the background.
510
00:21:49,416 --> 00:21:51,200
They are throwing money at us.
511
00:21:51,233 --> 00:21:51,433
You better get out there.
512
00:21:54,450 --> 00:21:56,660
Well!
513
00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:57,416
You were saying?
514
00:21:57,450 --> 00:21:58,483
I better get out there.
515
00:22:03,416 --> 00:22:05,316
Mmm.
516
00:22:05,350 --> 00:22:08,330
♪ I'm the greatest star ♪
517
00:22:09,250 --> 00:22:11,183
♪ I am by far ♪
518
00:22:11,216 --> 00:22:13,100
Raise my pay, start today!
519
00:22:13,133 --> 00:22:15,183
♪ But no one knows-- ♪
520
00:22:15,216 --> 00:22:16,133
Here.
521
00:22:29,233 --> 00:22:32,116
Nadine walked herself into Mr. Sheffield's bedroom
522
00:22:32,150 --> 00:22:34,116
in a flimsy negligee
523
00:22:34,150 --> 00:22:36,660
carrying a roast rack of lamb.
524
00:22:38,350 --> 00:22:40,216
What do you mean, why didn't I think of that first?
525
00:22:40,250 --> 00:22:42,233
No, that's not why I'm not married.
526
00:22:42,266 --> 00:22:43,466
How's my hand?
527
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:45,160
Lousy, Ma, lousy.
36813
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