Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,921 --> 00:00:14,790
If we're having
a problem fornicationally,
2
00:00:14,791 --> 00:00:16,525
then we should discuss it.
3
00:00:16,526 --> 00:00:17,993
We've got to get over this.
4
00:00:17,994 --> 00:00:20,462
Yes, well, it's a lot easier
for you to get over it.
5
00:00:20,463 --> 00:00:21,496
I've got to get... up
6
00:00:21,497 --> 00:00:23,365
and over it,
if you know what I mean.
7
00:00:23,366 --> 00:00:25,701
I hate my dick.
8
00:00:25,702 --> 00:00:27,135
Why aren't you doing my pilot?
9
00:00:27,136 --> 00:00:29,738
You'd be so right for it.
10
00:00:29,739 --> 00:00:31,873
- Maybe just give it a read.
- No, that's okay.
11
00:00:31,874 --> 00:00:33,308
What are you reading?
12
00:00:33,309 --> 00:00:35,210
That asshole's script.
13
00:00:35,211 --> 00:00:36,945
It's fucking brilliant.
14
00:00:36,946 --> 00:00:38,547
Oh, the bloody nerve.
15
00:00:38,548 --> 00:00:39,915
Trying to poach you from us?
16
00:00:39,916 --> 00:00:42,317
And that you would even consider...
17
00:00:42,318 --> 00:00:43,819
Little shit weasel.
18
00:00:43,820 --> 00:00:45,887
How are the new meds working out?
19
00:00:45,888 --> 00:00:47,055
Everything makes me hard.
20
00:00:47,056 --> 00:00:48,724
This morning when I was getting gas,
21
00:00:48,725 --> 00:00:50,792
I got a boner putting the nozzle
into the tank.
22
00:00:50,793 --> 00:00:53,495
I never cry at work.
23
00:00:53,496 --> 00:00:54,863
Well, I'd hug you,
24
00:00:54,864 --> 00:00:56,398
but obviously,
I'm all sweaty and...
25
00:00:56,399 --> 00:00:57,999
I don't mind.
26
00:01:06,743 --> 00:01:09,544
Sync and corrected by Elderfel
www.addic7ed.com
27
00:01:55,758 --> 00:01:58,192
Are you sure that's what it was?
28
00:01:58,193 --> 00:02:00,795
I am telling you, he's hugging me,
29
00:02:00,796 --> 00:02:04,065
and I'm thinking,
"Ooh, his arms are so hard."
30
00:02:04,066 --> 00:02:07,135
Then, all of a sudden,
it's like, "Fuck his arms."
31
00:02:07,136 --> 00:02:08,636
What the hell is that?"
32
00:02:08,637 --> 00:02:10,271
Unbelievable.
33
00:02:10,272 --> 00:02:12,106
- I know!
- No.
34
00:02:12,107 --> 00:02:14,575
My "unbelievable" is not
a good "unbelievable."
35
00:02:14,576 --> 00:02:15,810
Oh, come on.
36
00:02:15,811 --> 00:02:19,580
Just knowing he's feeling
what I'm feeling,
37
00:02:19,581 --> 00:02:23,217
and believe me,
I felt what he's feeling.
38
00:02:23,218 --> 00:02:25,486
Has history taught you nothing?
39
00:02:25,487 --> 00:02:27,889
You have been down
this road before.
40
00:02:27,890 --> 00:02:29,157
But with Merc.
41
00:02:29,158 --> 00:02:32,527
If I knew I could only go down
the road one time,
42
00:02:32,528 --> 00:02:35,663
that's not who I would've
gone down it with!
43
00:02:35,664 --> 00:02:37,465
- Look, you asked my opinion...
- Did I?
44
00:02:37,466 --> 00:02:39,467
All right,
I offered you my opinion.
45
00:02:39,468 --> 00:02:40,969
And I hear what you're saying,
46
00:02:40,970 --> 00:02:44,939
but then I look at Castor,
47
00:02:44,940 --> 00:02:49,310
and he's so brilliant
and sexy and powerful!
48
00:02:49,311 --> 00:02:50,678
He's your boss.
49
00:02:50,679 --> 00:02:53,047
I know! He's the whole package!
50
00:02:54,583 --> 00:02:57,385
- The side effects haven't lessened at all?
- No.
51
00:02:57,386 --> 00:02:59,955
Yesterday, I had to give
this stupid woman
52
00:02:59,956 --> 00:03:01,356
who works for me a hug,
53
00:03:01,357 --> 00:03:03,859
and she was almost impaled on it!
54
00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:05,961
All right. We'll start
cutting back on your dosage.
55
00:03:05,962 --> 00:03:08,597
Cutting back? No.
Can't we just stop?
56
00:03:08,598 --> 00:03:10,365
Not with this medication.
57
00:03:10,366 --> 00:03:12,734
We have to wean you off slowly.
58
00:03:12,735 --> 00:03:15,604
Just so you know,
when you said "wean,"
59
00:03:15,605 --> 00:03:17,072
I got a little hard.
60
00:03:18,174 --> 00:03:20,675
You realize we're halfway up
this mountain,
61
00:03:20,676 --> 00:03:22,978
all we've talked about
is your boss' erection.
62
00:03:22,979 --> 00:03:24,079
Okay, fine.
63
00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:26,181
Any erections
you want to talk about?
64
00:03:26,182 --> 00:03:27,249
- Nope.
- Really?
65
00:03:27,250 --> 00:03:31,553
- No.
- You and Sean still no...
66
00:03:31,854 --> 00:03:34,088
Have you thought
about seeing someone,
67
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:36,391
like a couple's counselor
or something?
68
00:03:36,392 --> 00:03:38,893
I could ask my shrink
to recommend someone.
69
00:03:38,894 --> 00:03:40,728
Wait a minute.
70
00:03:40,729 --> 00:03:42,997
You have a shrink?
71
00:03:42,998 --> 00:03:45,200
Uh-huh. He's really good.
72
00:03:45,201 --> 00:03:47,035
Really?
73
00:03:49,171 --> 00:03:50,205
Hello?
74
00:03:50,206 --> 00:03:52,740
In here!
75
00:03:54,009 --> 00:03:56,544
That is the best "hello" ever.
76
00:03:57,780 --> 00:04:00,315
Don't move.
I'm coming in for a kiss.
77
00:04:05,521 --> 00:04:07,689
Almost done.
78
00:04:07,690 --> 00:04:10,491
No rush.
79
00:04:16,065 --> 00:04:19,234
Uh, what happened
to all the paintings?
80
00:04:19,235 --> 00:04:20,702
What do you mean?
81
00:04:20,703 --> 00:04:22,770
The paintings that were hanging
on the walls?
82
00:04:22,771 --> 00:04:24,539
- They're not.
- Are you kidding?
83
00:04:24,540 --> 00:04:25,773
You didn't know?
84
00:04:25,774 --> 00:04:27,709
No. I didn't know.
Which ones?
85
00:04:27,710 --> 00:04:30,278
Uh, the one over the fireplace.
86
00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:32,146
The Diebenkorn's gone?
87
00:04:32,147 --> 00:04:34,215
Assuming that's a painting, yeah.
88
00:04:34,216 --> 00:04:35,884
And the one by the door,
89
00:04:35,885 --> 00:04:37,719
and the creepy baby face is gone.
90
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:38,887
Oh, my God!
91
00:04:38,888 --> 00:04:40,822
Hang on.
92
00:04:40,823 --> 00:04:44,292
Yep, everything in here, too.
93
00:04:44,293 --> 00:04:46,794
I don't believe this.
Is anything else missing?
94
00:04:46,795 --> 00:04:48,730
I don't know. Uh...
95
00:04:48,731 --> 00:04:50,565
Looks like just the paintings.
96
00:04:50,566 --> 00:04:52,800
Who else besides me
has your gate code?
97
00:04:52,801 --> 00:04:56,070
Maria, my assistant, Missy.
98
00:04:56,071 --> 00:04:58,606
Ohh, Jesus.
99
00:04:58,607 --> 00:05:00,575
What?
100
00:05:00,576 --> 00:05:02,310
Oh, that motherfucker.
101
00:05:02,311 --> 00:05:04,112
He still has your code?
102
00:05:04,113 --> 00:05:05,413
Even he wouldn't do this.
103
00:05:05,414 --> 00:05:06,414
Merc?
104
00:05:06,415 --> 00:05:07,582
He'd totally do this.
105
00:05:07,583 --> 00:05:10,718
Think of all the shit he did to you
when you weren't divorcing him.
106
00:05:10,719 --> 00:05:12,086
- I'm calling him.
- No, don't call him.
107
00:05:12,087 --> 00:05:13,421
Oh, I'm calling him.
108
00:05:13,422 --> 00:05:14,722
Please, just let my lawyers
handle it.
109
00:05:14,723 --> 00:05:18,026
No, someone's got to tell him
what a giant asshole he is.
110
00:05:18,027 --> 00:05:20,728
Believe me, I've told him.
Please, stay out of it.
111
00:05:20,729 --> 00:05:22,430
For me.
112
00:05:26,302 --> 00:05:28,736
Did you put your phone away?
113
00:05:28,737 --> 00:05:30,104
Yes.
114
00:05:30,105 --> 00:05:31,105
Did you?
115
00:05:31,106 --> 00:05:33,808
Yes.
116
00:05:33,809 --> 00:05:35,410
Thank you.
117
00:05:44,754 --> 00:05:47,756
What's the deal with this
network press thing tonight?
118
00:05:47,757 --> 00:05:49,257
Oh, I forgot. That's tonight?
119
00:05:49,258 --> 00:05:51,826
Yeah, it's this stupid cocktail
party for the TV critics.
120
00:05:51,827 --> 00:05:53,328
The networks do it every year.
121
00:05:53,329 --> 00:05:54,729
Seriously?
122
00:05:54,730 --> 00:05:57,065
The people who wrote all
the nasty things about us,
123
00:05:57,066 --> 00:05:58,733
we have to have canapes with them?
124
00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:00,335
Yeah, it's not as much fun
as it sounds.
125
00:06:00,336 --> 00:06:01,803
And there's no getting out of it?
126
00:06:01,804 --> 00:06:03,238
Not unless you're on a hit show.
127
00:06:03,239 --> 00:06:05,106
So there's no getting out of it.
128
00:06:05,107 --> 00:06:07,575
There you are. Ready?
129
00:06:07,576 --> 00:06:08,610
For what?
130
00:06:08,611 --> 00:06:11,046
Oh, shit. That's now?
131
00:06:11,047 --> 00:06:12,213
What's now?
132
00:06:12,214 --> 00:06:16,518
Nothing. It's a... private thing.
133
00:06:16,519 --> 00:06:17,852
What kind of private thing?
134
00:06:17,853 --> 00:06:21,022
Well, it's a thing,
135
00:06:21,023 --> 00:06:23,024
and it's private.
136
00:06:23,025 --> 00:06:24,693
You're really not gonna tell me?
137
00:06:24,694 --> 00:06:25,694
No.
138
00:06:26,629 --> 00:06:28,530
No. See you tonight.
139
00:06:30,533 --> 00:06:32,967
What do you think it is?
140
00:06:32,968 --> 00:06:34,803
Who gives a shit?
141
00:06:38,474 --> 00:06:40,975
So, have, uh,
either of you ever been
142
00:06:40,976 --> 00:06:42,677
to a sex therapist before?
143
00:06:48,317 --> 00:06:51,286
W-we were under the impression
that you were a couple's counselor.
144
00:06:51,287 --> 00:06:53,555
Specializing in sex therapy.
145
00:06:53,556 --> 00:06:55,223
Bloody hell.
146
00:06:55,224 --> 00:06:56,591
We were not aware.
147
00:06:56,592 --> 00:06:57,926
Thanks, Carol.
148
00:06:57,927 --> 00:07:00,929
Oh, so this isn't a sexual issue
that you're here to deal with?
149
00:07:00,930 --> 00:07:02,964
Well, it is.
150
00:07:02,965 --> 00:07:04,866
It is.
151
00:07:04,867 --> 00:07:09,537
All right, then why don't you tell me
a little bit about what's going on?
152
00:07:14,910 --> 00:07:16,811
Okay.
153
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:20,415
We have recently
been through a, um...
154
00:07:20,416 --> 00:07:23,017
a bit of a rough patch
in our marriage,
155
00:07:23,018 --> 00:07:26,087
which we have both worked
very hard to get past.
156
00:07:26,088 --> 00:07:29,190
Unfortunately...
157
00:07:29,191 --> 00:07:32,794
it has left us with certain...
158
00:07:32,795 --> 00:07:35,296
uh, ramifications.
159
00:07:35,297 --> 00:07:36,431
Sexual?
160
00:07:36,432 --> 00:07:38,566
Sexual. Yes.
161
00:07:38,567 --> 00:07:41,809
Sexual. Sexual.
162
00:07:41,810 --> 00:07:43,138
Say it another 10 times.
163
00:07:43,139 --> 00:07:45,073
- I'm sorry, it is sexual.
- Nine more.
164
00:07:45,074 --> 00:07:47,242
Sean, let me ask you a question.
165
00:07:47,243 --> 00:07:49,711
Are you able to achieve an erection?
166
00:07:51,747 --> 00:07:54,015
I'd really rather not say.
167
00:07:54,016 --> 00:07:55,917
If you want me to help you...
168
00:07:55,918 --> 00:07:57,752
That is why we're here.
169
00:07:57,753 --> 00:07:59,921
Fine.
170
00:07:59,922 --> 00:08:01,022
So, are you?
171
00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:02,690
Am I what?
172
00:08:02,691 --> 00:08:05,360
Are you able to achieve an erection?
173
00:08:05,361 --> 00:08:08,263
Mm-hmm.
174
00:08:08,264 --> 00:08:11,833
Do you find it difficult
to maintain your erection
175
00:08:11,834 --> 00:08:13,601
to complete intercourse?
176
00:08:16,806 --> 00:08:18,106
I'd rather not say.
177
00:08:18,107 --> 00:08:19,207
Yes.
178
00:08:19,208 --> 00:08:21,609
Do you masturbate?
179
00:08:21,610 --> 00:08:23,715
- Her or me?
- You.
180
00:08:23,716 --> 00:08:25,450
I'd rather not say.
181
00:08:28,684 --> 00:08:31,653
Beverly, I'd like
to try an exercise.
182
00:08:31,654 --> 00:08:32,987
All right.
183
00:08:32,988 --> 00:08:37,158
If your vagina could speak
to Sean right now,
184
00:08:37,159 --> 00:08:38,693
what would it say to him?
185
00:08:38,694 --> 00:08:40,228
If my vagina could speak,
186
00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:43,398
we'd be having an entirely
different set of problems.
187
00:08:43,399 --> 00:08:44,799
I sense your discomfort.
188
00:08:46,168 --> 00:08:47,635
But, please.
189
00:08:51,841 --> 00:08:53,908
Okay.
190
00:08:53,909 --> 00:08:55,877
Uh...
191
00:08:57,479 --> 00:08:59,848
I suppose, if it could speak...
192
00:09:02,885 --> 00:09:04,519
it would want him to know...
193
00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:08,456
No. No. No.
As your vagina to Sean.
194
00:09:19,268 --> 00:09:23,204
Hi, Sean.
195
00:09:31,413 --> 00:09:36,451
Have you two thought about
alternatives to intercourse?
196
00:09:36,452 --> 00:09:39,988
Perhaps you could
pleasure each other orally
197
00:09:39,989 --> 00:09:41,856
or engage in anal play.
198
00:09:41,857 --> 00:09:44,392
- Mm, absolutely.
- Mm-hmm.
199
00:09:44,393 --> 00:09:45,633
Take me home.
I want to go home.
200
00:09:50,466 --> 00:09:52,767
Though others have been in me,
201
00:09:52,768 --> 00:09:55,637
you are the one I want.
202
00:10:01,210 --> 00:10:04,913
Sean, as you find yourself
losing your erection...
203
00:10:04,914 --> 00:10:06,247
Oh, good, we're back on that.
204
00:10:06,248 --> 00:10:09,417
Do you think that there's anything
that Beverly could do differently?
205
00:10:09,418 --> 00:10:12,086
No.
206
00:10:12,087 --> 00:10:14,022
No? Maybe something
that she used to do,
207
00:10:14,023 --> 00:10:16,958
- or for some fantasy?
- No.
208
00:10:16,959 --> 00:10:19,294
Maybe something
that this other woman did.
209
00:10:19,295 --> 00:10:20,695
Oh, God, no.
210
00:10:20,696 --> 00:10:23,665
Look... It's not about sex.
211
00:10:23,666 --> 00:10:25,300
- Well...
- It's not.
212
00:10:25,301 --> 00:10:26,734
I hate to disappoint you.
213
00:10:26,735 --> 00:10:28,536
I realize that's your thing,
214
00:10:28,537 --> 00:10:31,272
and I'm sorry if this
leaves you out of the mix,
215
00:10:31,273 --> 00:10:34,075
but what happened to us
had nothing to do with...
216
00:10:34,076 --> 00:10:36,344
copulation.
217
00:10:36,345 --> 00:10:39,914
And I'm speaking
for my cock here, as well.
218
00:10:39,915 --> 00:10:41,582
Well, so then, what is it about?
219
00:10:45,054 --> 00:10:46,921
Trust.
220
00:10:46,922 --> 00:10:50,391
- Trust?
- Right.
221
00:10:50,392 --> 00:10:53,061
It's not about sex.
It's not even about love.
222
00:10:53,062 --> 00:10:55,763
Love's the easy bit.
223
00:10:55,764 --> 00:11:01,669
It turns out,
finding trust with someone,
224
00:11:01,670 --> 00:11:04,973
feeling safe,
225
00:11:04,974 --> 00:11:06,941
that's...
226
00:11:10,779 --> 00:11:13,781
And when I finally found it,
I thought,
227
00:11:13,782 --> 00:11:18,519
"Well, there you go. That's it."
228
00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:21,489
But...
229
00:11:21,490 --> 00:11:25,426
when the trust goes away,
230
00:11:25,427 --> 00:11:27,862
when you can't feel it anymore...
231
00:11:30,699 --> 00:11:33,501
I don't know how you get it back.
232
00:11:38,607 --> 00:11:42,176
Sometimes I think...
233
00:11:42,177 --> 00:11:43,544
What?
234
00:11:43,545 --> 00:11:46,748
Sometimes I think
235
00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:50,451
maybe we've somehow...
236
00:11:50,452 --> 00:11:53,788
broken something fundamental...
237
00:11:53,789 --> 00:11:55,923
that can't be fixed.
238
00:12:14,959 --> 00:12:17,112
What the fuck!?
239
00:12:17,113 --> 00:12:18,513
Are you crazy?
240
00:12:18,514 --> 00:12:21,783
You had to tell her
about the fucking paintings.
241
00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:24,685
She was fine until
you opened your big mouth.
242
00:12:24,686 --> 00:12:27,355
Three weeks, she didn't even
know that they were gone!
243
00:12:27,356 --> 00:12:29,957
Now all of a sudden,
it's, "Oh, I need my paintings."
244
00:12:29,958 --> 00:12:32,960
I can't feel the presence of my art."
245
00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:34,095
God, you're a dick.
246
00:12:34,096 --> 00:12:35,229
Then suck me.
247
00:12:35,230 --> 00:12:38,099
Just stay out of
my goddamn business!
248
00:12:38,100 --> 00:12:39,400
Or what?
You'll cancel my show?
249
00:12:39,401 --> 00:12:41,869
Oh, wait, you can't,
because they canceled you.
250
00:12:41,870 --> 00:12:44,338
You know what?
I'm glad I didn't cancel you.
251
00:12:44,339 --> 00:12:46,741
I like knowing you're stuck
in that piece of shit.
252
00:12:46,742 --> 00:12:47,975
It feels good.
253
00:12:47,976 --> 00:12:49,410
Oh, yeah?
You know what really feels good?
254
00:12:49,411 --> 00:12:54,082
Putting my penis
inside your wife's vagina.
255
00:12:54,083 --> 00:12:56,384
Oh. Look who went
to medical school.
256
00:12:56,385 --> 00:12:57,952
You know what?
You can have her.
257
00:12:57,953 --> 00:12:59,887
- I already got her.
- Well, keep her!
258
00:12:59,888 --> 00:13:03,624
By the way, is the whole blind thing
getting a little tired yet?
259
00:13:03,625 --> 00:13:05,560
Wait till you watch her eat soup.
260
00:13:05,561 --> 00:13:06,928
All right, that's it.
261
00:13:06,929 --> 00:13:08,329
Get the hell out of my driveway,
262
00:13:08,330 --> 00:13:10,298
and you better put those
fucking paintings back.
263
00:13:10,299 --> 00:13:11,499
Or what?
264
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:13,501
You don't scare me.
265
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:14,836
- Huh?
- I'm serious.
266
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:16,237
You do not want to mess with this.
267
00:13:18,140 --> 00:13:20,007
I swear to God!
268
00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:22,610
You are so lucky
that I have dinner plans.
269
00:13:43,665 --> 00:13:46,601
We're all really excited about
the show moving to Saturday.
270
00:13:46,602 --> 00:13:48,269
Talk a little more about that.
271
00:13:48,270 --> 00:13:51,105
Well, there's so little original
programing on Saturdays.
272
00:13:51,106 --> 00:13:53,674
It gives us a chance to reach
a whole new audience.
273
00:13:53,675 --> 00:13:55,543
So, basically,
you're hoping to do well
274
00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:57,311
only because
there's nothing else on.
275
00:13:57,312 --> 00:13:58,713
Yeah.
276
00:14:01,116 --> 00:14:05,219
I never saw it, but when
you did the show in England,
277
00:14:05,220 --> 00:14:07,955
- it was a big hit, right?
- Uh-huh.
278
00:14:07,956 --> 00:14:10,057
Is there something
we're not getting?
279
00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:13,761
You're not getting the show
we did in England!
280
00:14:13,762 --> 00:14:15,229
Excuse me.
281
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:17,331
Can I just steal these two
for a sec?
282
00:14:17,332 --> 00:14:18,366
Sure.
283
00:14:18,367 --> 00:14:20,468
You're welcome.
284
00:14:20,469 --> 00:14:22,503
My God, does anyone like our show?
285
00:14:22,504 --> 00:14:24,238
Probably.
286
00:14:27,242 --> 00:14:29,377
There he is.
287
00:14:29,378 --> 00:14:33,881
- There who is?
- Castor.
288
00:14:34,182 --> 00:14:35,549
What do you think?
289
00:14:35,550 --> 00:14:39,019
I think he's the cliff,
and you're Thelma and Louise.
290
00:14:39,020 --> 00:14:42,189
Yeah. I'd drive off that.
291
00:14:43,658 --> 00:14:46,760
Okay, so when you're finished
talking business,
292
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:48,362
I'll be over at the bar.
293
00:14:48,363 --> 00:14:50,297
Look at him.
294
00:14:50,298 --> 00:14:52,233
He's under so much pressure.
295
00:14:52,234 --> 00:14:55,069
This is, like,
his first official thing.
296
00:14:55,070 --> 00:14:57,671
It's got to be so hard.
297
00:14:57,672 --> 00:14:59,540
Anyway...
298
00:14:59,541 --> 00:15:01,542
Oh, by the way... at some point,
299
00:15:01,543 --> 00:15:03,644
we need to have a little chat
300
00:15:03,645 --> 00:15:06,380
about our visit
to the "counselor" today.
301
00:15:06,381 --> 00:15:08,415
Oh, right. How'd it go?
302
00:15:08,416 --> 00:15:10,184
- Not now.
- No, tell me.
303
00:15:10,185 --> 00:15:15,155
You might have mentioned
she's a sex therapist.
304
00:15:15,156 --> 00:15:16,557
- Didn't I?
- No.
305
00:15:16,558 --> 00:15:17,691
- No?
- No!
306
00:15:17,692 --> 00:15:19,827
She talked about anal play.
307
00:15:19,828 --> 00:15:22,696
- Maybe let's do this later.
- Let's.
308
00:15:25,033 --> 00:15:27,451
I have Matt LeBlanc coming in.
309
00:15:27,452 --> 00:15:30,020
So, Morning and the boys
are here already,
310
00:15:30,021 --> 00:15:31,987
and Stoke's not coming.
You know that, right?
311
00:15:31,988 --> 00:15:34,942
- How the hell did he get out of it?
- He's shooting some V05 commercial.
312
00:15:34,943 --> 00:15:36,344
Fucking hair.
313
00:15:36,345 --> 00:15:38,279
The important thing
is that you're here.
314
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:40,181
Everybody's very excited
to talk to you.
315
00:15:40,182 --> 00:15:42,183
Great.
I'm very excited about vodka.
316
00:15:42,184 --> 00:15:43,417
Can you get me a vodka?
317
00:15:43,418 --> 00:15:45,753
I can.
Anything you need, I'm here.
318
00:15:45,754 --> 00:15:48,222
- Uh, vodka.
- Absolutely.
319
00:15:48,223 --> 00:15:50,024
First, let's just go through
a few quick talking points.
320
00:15:50,025 --> 00:15:51,392
Yeah. Yeah.
321
00:15:51,393 --> 00:15:53,861
You're really psyched about
"Pucks'" big move to Saturday.
322
00:15:53,862 --> 00:15:56,597
It's a great opportunity
for the show,
323
00:15:56,598 --> 00:15:58,132
feels like a fresh start,
324
00:15:58,133 --> 00:16:01,168
and it's a chance to attract
a whole new audience.
325
00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:02,470
Anything else?
326
00:16:02,471 --> 00:16:03,804
Vodka?
327
00:16:03,805 --> 00:16:05,172
There you go.
328
00:16:12,314 --> 00:16:16,650
I got to ask, what made you
come back in this?
329
00:16:16,651 --> 00:16:19,420
Uh, a new bank
opened down the street,
330
00:16:19,421 --> 00:16:21,322
and I wanted to fill it up.
331
00:16:21,323 --> 00:16:23,190
No, seriously,
332
00:16:23,191 --> 00:16:26,260
after being on a hit,
this has got to be rough, no?
333
00:16:26,261 --> 00:16:28,129
Nah. I'm having a blast.
334
00:16:28,130 --> 00:16:31,332
Very excited about the show
moving to Saturday.
335
00:16:31,333 --> 00:16:33,167
Saturday.
336
00:16:33,168 --> 00:16:34,769
Even though you're barely on it now?
337
00:16:34,770 --> 00:16:37,671
That's not true.
338
00:16:37,672 --> 00:16:38,806
How come all of a sudden,
339
00:16:38,807 --> 00:16:40,574
no one wants to talk about
my hair turning gray?
340
00:16:41,910 --> 00:16:44,745
No offense, it's not really
your show anymore.
341
00:16:44,746 --> 00:16:47,181
What, are you trying
to cause trouble here?
342
00:16:47,182 --> 00:16:49,083
It's still my show.
343
00:16:49,084 --> 00:16:51,018
Is it?
344
00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:59,226
I swear,
they never showed it to us.
345
00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:00,261
Look at that!
346
00:17:00,262 --> 00:17:02,029
I'm smaller
than the fucking Puck!
347
00:17:02,030 --> 00:17:03,297
Hey, can I have a daiquiri, please?
348
00:17:03,298 --> 00:17:05,800
Hey, Matt.
349
00:17:05,801 --> 00:17:08,202
Bruno Aiken, Houston Sentinel.
350
00:17:08,203 --> 00:17:09,470
How you doing?
351
00:17:09,471 --> 00:17:11,772
Hey.
352
00:17:11,773 --> 00:17:12,973
Hey.
353
00:17:12,974 --> 00:17:15,709
You're the guy who called me fat.
354
00:17:15,710 --> 00:17:17,778
Uh, I don't... I don't...
355
00:17:17,779 --> 00:17:20,815
In your review. You called me fat.
356
00:17:20,816 --> 00:17:23,484
Are you fucking kidding me?
You're 10 times fatter than me.
357
00:17:23,485 --> 00:17:25,119
Well...
358
00:17:25,120 --> 00:17:26,787
You know, you can't tell
from that tiny picture
359
00:17:26,788 --> 00:17:27,822
in your stupid column
360
00:17:27,823 --> 00:17:28,823
and with the beard and everything,
361
00:17:28,824 --> 00:17:30,391
but that's all face under there.
362
00:17:30,392 --> 00:17:31,392
Wow!
363
00:17:35,630 --> 00:17:38,732
So, you know we're moving
to Saturday?
364
00:17:47,108 --> 00:17:49,477
How much longer do you think
we have to stay?
365
00:17:49,478 --> 00:17:51,679
I don't know.
366
00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:52,947
Shit.
367
00:17:52,948 --> 00:17:54,281
- What?
- Over there.
368
00:17:56,184 --> 00:17:58,953
Oh. Please, God,
don't let him see us.
369
00:17:58,954 --> 00:18:01,188
I swear, I cannot face him tonight.
370
00:18:01,189 --> 00:18:03,557
If I hear one more,
"Bev, guess what?
371
00:18:03,558 --> 00:18:05,659
I farted, and an Oscar came out."
372
00:18:05,660 --> 00:18:07,094
All right, if he moves towards us,
373
00:18:07,095 --> 00:18:08,629
let's just pretend...
fuck, he saw us.
374
00:18:08,630 --> 00:18:10,364
Oh, God, please don't come over.
375
00:18:10,365 --> 00:18:12,533
Please don't come over.
Is he coming over?
376
00:18:12,534 --> 00:18:15,102
No.
377
00:18:17,205 --> 00:18:18,672
Well, that's odd.
378
00:18:18,673 --> 00:18:20,307
- Sure it's him?
- Of course it's him.
379
00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:21,375
Look at the poncy scarf.
380
00:18:21,376 --> 00:18:22,376
Maybe he didn't see us.
381
00:18:22,377 --> 00:18:24,178
Oh, he saw us.
382
00:18:24,179 --> 00:18:25,412
Look, he just saw us again.
383
00:18:25,413 --> 00:18:26,747
And nothing!
384
00:18:26,748 --> 00:18:27,815
Didn't even wave!
385
00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:30,017
He's blowing us off.
386
00:18:30,018 --> 00:18:33,487
That little shit!
387
00:18:33,488 --> 00:18:36,223
Give me a vodka,
and then another vodka.
388
00:18:37,959 --> 00:18:39,527
What are you guys staring at?
389
00:18:39,528 --> 00:18:41,228
That dick whistle Andrew Lesley.
390
00:18:41,229 --> 00:18:42,596
Andrew Lesley's here?
391
00:18:45,534 --> 00:18:48,636
Andrew. Hey!
392
00:18:48,637 --> 00:18:50,738
Monsieur LeBlanc!
393
00:18:52,374 --> 00:18:55,042
What are you doing here?
394
00:18:55,043 --> 00:18:57,678
Oh, I-I just shot a pilot
with a network.
395
00:18:57,679 --> 00:18:58,946
Plus the one for NBC?
396
00:18:58,947 --> 00:19:00,247
I know.
397
00:19:00,248 --> 00:19:02,516
I worry there won't be enough
of me to go around.
398
00:19:02,517 --> 00:19:05,386
Listen, I didn't get a chance
to tell you.
399
00:19:05,387 --> 00:19:06,787
I loved your script.
400
00:19:06,788 --> 00:19:08,022
You did not.
401
00:19:08,023 --> 00:19:09,456
Oh, my God, are you kidding?
402
00:19:09,457 --> 00:19:11,725
Well, everyone says it, but still.
403
00:19:11,726 --> 00:19:13,127
So, uh, where are you with casting?
404
00:19:13,128 --> 00:19:14,562
In hell, thanks to you.
405
00:19:14,563 --> 00:19:16,463
Y-you positively ruined me.
406
00:19:16,464 --> 00:19:19,500
Now I can only hear your voice
in my head.
407
00:19:19,501 --> 00:19:20,734
Well, keep hearing it,
408
00:19:20,735 --> 00:19:23,037
'cause they're trying "Pucks"
on a new night,
409
00:19:23,038 --> 00:19:24,672
and if it doesn't work...
410
00:19:24,673 --> 00:19:27,041
Now you're just being a tease.
411
00:19:27,042 --> 00:19:29,910
Hey, stop teasing me.
412
00:19:29,911 --> 00:19:31,211
Look at them.
413
00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:32,713
What an asshole.
414
00:19:32,714 --> 00:19:35,215
- Which one?
- Take your pick.
415
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,585
Look, it's no secret
we're in last place.
416
00:19:37,586 --> 00:19:40,254
Good news is,
we have nowhere to go but up.
417
00:19:40,255 --> 00:19:43,057
And yes, I'm aware
that's not very good news.
418
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,560
It's got to feel like your
schedule's in free fall, though.
419
00:19:46,561 --> 00:19:49,296
I think all network TV's
in free fall.
420
00:19:49,297 --> 00:19:52,766
We're just the first ones
pushed out of the plane.
421
00:19:52,767 --> 00:19:56,604
Does it worry you that you've
never run a network before?
422
00:19:56,605 --> 00:19:57,938
What?
423
00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:00,708
Okay, look, what can I say?
424
00:20:00,709 --> 00:20:03,744
The last guy who had this job
ran the network for years.
425
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:06,513
Unfortunately, he ran
the network into the ground.
426
00:20:09,584 --> 00:20:13,120
So, you're saying this is
all Merc Lapidus' mess?
427
00:20:14,689 --> 00:20:17,324
I'm sorry, what?
428
00:20:19,294 --> 00:20:20,794
Merc's mess?
429
00:20:20,795 --> 00:20:22,229
Uh, no.
430
00:20:22,230 --> 00:20:25,132
Uh, look, I could easily
pin it all on him,
431
00:20:25,133 --> 00:20:28,135
but it's a totally different
landscape today.
432
00:20:29,804 --> 00:20:32,773
We're not... just competing
against each other.
433
00:20:32,774 --> 00:20:33,774
There are...
434
00:20:36,878 --> 00:20:38,145
There are all these...
435
00:20:39,481 --> 00:20:40,614
new platforms.
436
00:20:48,657 --> 00:20:50,157
Excuse me.
437
00:20:57,766 --> 00:20:59,233
Hey, there.
438
00:20:59,234 --> 00:21:00,934
Are you all right?
439
00:21:00,935 --> 00:21:02,970
I'm fine. Go back to the party.
440
00:21:07,075 --> 00:21:09,643
Look, I get it.
441
00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:11,779
It's hard.
442
00:21:11,780 --> 00:21:14,581
You...
443
00:21:14,582 --> 00:21:16,316
You can tell?
444
00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:18,786
Of course I can tell.
445
00:21:18,787 --> 00:21:20,120
Oh, Jesus.
446
00:21:20,121 --> 00:21:22,890
You think... everyone can tell?
447
00:21:22,891 --> 00:21:25,259
No! No, you're doing great.
448
00:21:26,461 --> 00:21:28,929
But I totally get
what you're going through.
449
00:21:28,930 --> 00:21:30,431
You do?
450
00:21:30,432 --> 00:21:32,066
Totally.
451
00:21:32,067 --> 00:21:34,001
Now, listen to me.
452
00:21:34,002 --> 00:21:36,603
You are not alone in this,
453
00:21:36,604 --> 00:21:38,939
no matter how hard it gets,
454
00:21:38,940 --> 00:21:43,410
and believe me,
it can always get harder.
455
00:21:43,411 --> 00:21:45,779
I don't think that's possible.
456
00:21:45,780 --> 00:21:48,115
I'm here for you.
457
00:21:48,116 --> 00:21:49,950
Whatever you need.
458
00:21:49,951 --> 00:21:53,120
Really?
459
00:22:17,278 --> 00:22:20,514
Well, don't you look pretty.
460
00:22:20,515 --> 00:22:23,217
I didn't realize
the dress code this morning
461
00:22:23,218 --> 00:22:25,152
was cocktail disheveled.
462
00:22:26,755 --> 00:22:30,057
I tried calling, but there's
no reception up here.
463
00:22:30,058 --> 00:22:33,060
- I can't do this today.
- Is it the heels?
464
00:22:34,295 --> 00:22:38,866
I never got home last night.
465
00:22:38,867 --> 00:22:40,167
I couldn't help but notice
466
00:22:40,168 --> 00:22:42,069
the hiking outfit did look familiar.
467
00:22:42,070 --> 00:22:43,971
Don't be mad.
468
00:22:43,972 --> 00:22:45,973
Castor?
469
00:22:45,974 --> 00:22:48,675
Oh, my God.
470
00:22:48,676 --> 00:22:50,577
- You slept with him.
- I swear,
471
00:22:50,578 --> 00:22:52,346
there was no sleeping.
472
00:22:52,347 --> 00:22:54,314
It was insane!
473
00:22:54,315 --> 00:22:58,719
He went literally...
literally all night.
474
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,755
I've never seen anything like it.
475
00:23:01,756 --> 00:23:06,059
Merc on a good day, plus Viagra,
maybe 10 minutes.
476
00:23:07,328 --> 00:23:09,229
This was superhuman.
477
00:23:09,230 --> 00:23:11,832
Calendar pages were flying off.
478
00:23:11,833 --> 00:23:15,836
Flowers were coming up
and opening, and dying.
479
00:23:17,172 --> 00:23:19,673
I guess, hmm, no offense,
480
00:23:19,674 --> 00:23:21,341
but I definitely hate you.
481
00:23:21,342 --> 00:23:23,844
What?
Oh, God. Sorry.
482
00:23:23,845 --> 00:23:25,712
No, no. Don't feel bad.
483
00:23:25,713 --> 00:23:30,551
It's not at all like telling Gandhi
about how you ate a whole ham.
484
00:23:30,552 --> 00:23:32,252
I...
485
00:23:32,253 --> 00:23:36,023
If it helps, I'm really sore!
486
00:23:36,024 --> 00:23:38,091
Doesn't help!
487
00:23:53,308 --> 00:23:54,908
Hello, there.
488
00:23:54,909 --> 00:23:56,443
Hey.
489
00:23:56,444 --> 00:23:59,379
Just thought you'd be happy to
know the paintings are back.
490
00:23:59,380 --> 00:24:00,380
Really?
491
00:24:00,381 --> 00:24:01,982
Up on the walls and everything.
492
00:24:01,983 --> 00:24:03,383
That's great.
493
00:24:03,384 --> 00:24:05,853
Thank you for, uh,
staying out of it.
494
00:24:05,854 --> 00:24:07,421
I know that wasn't easy.
495
00:24:07,422 --> 00:24:09,156
Ah...
496
00:24:09,157 --> 00:24:11,258
I'm just happy it all worked out.
497
00:24:11,259 --> 00:24:13,627
So, am I seeing you later?
498
00:24:13,628 --> 00:24:17,030
Definitely. Maybe go to the beach?
499
00:24:17,031 --> 00:24:20,434
Oh, sounds great.
I am dying for a swim.
500
00:24:20,435 --> 00:24:23,737
Maybe after,
we could go out somewhere.
501
00:24:23,738 --> 00:24:25,105
How about Nobu?
502
00:24:25,106 --> 00:24:27,641
Nobu? I love Nobu.
503
00:24:35,383 --> 00:24:37,284
What are you doing?
504
00:24:37,285 --> 00:24:40,320
I don't know. Just looking.
505
00:24:40,321 --> 00:24:42,489
Would you like a chair?
506
00:24:42,490 --> 00:24:43,957
No.
507
00:24:43,958 --> 00:24:46,126
Want to do something?
508
00:24:46,127 --> 00:24:47,961
Sure.
509
00:24:47,962 --> 00:24:49,263
What?
510
00:24:49,264 --> 00:24:50,530
Anything. I don't care.
511
00:24:50,531 --> 00:24:51,798
Like a movie or something?
512
00:24:51,799 --> 00:24:53,600
- Mm...
- So, not anything.
513
00:24:53,601 --> 00:24:55,602
Not really in a movie mood.
514
00:24:55,603 --> 00:25:00,007
We could just stay at home
and pleasure each other orally.
515
00:25:00,008 --> 00:25:01,608
Oh, my God!
516
00:25:01,609 --> 00:25:02,943
That was the worst hour of my life.
517
00:25:02,944 --> 00:25:05,712
So then, uh, not up
for a little, uh, anal play?
518
00:25:05,713 --> 00:25:06,847
Saw an anal play once.
519
00:25:08,116 --> 00:25:09,917
- Was it shitty?
- It was.
520
00:25:09,918 --> 00:25:11,418
That's why we get the big bucks!
521
00:25:12,787 --> 00:25:14,755
Will you ever recover from that?
522
00:25:14,756 --> 00:25:16,690
Never.
Permanently traumatized.
523
00:25:16,691 --> 00:25:20,127
By the way, why does
your vagina sound like Yoda?
524
00:25:20,128 --> 00:25:23,196
I didn't know what to do.
525
00:25:23,197 --> 00:25:24,998
"Penetrate me, you could.
526
00:25:24,999 --> 00:25:28,201
- Lubricated, I am."
- Shut up.
527
00:25:28,202 --> 00:25:30,337
"Sometimes, like popcorn,
I smell."
528
00:25:30,338 --> 00:25:33,006
Stop it!
529
00:25:36,344 --> 00:25:38,211
We're not broken.
530
00:25:38,212 --> 00:25:40,714
You don't think?
531
00:25:40,715 --> 00:25:43,951
Maybe a little cracked.
532
00:26:00,568 --> 00:26:02,436
Wow.
533
00:26:02,437 --> 00:26:03,737
Did not see that coming.
534
00:26:03,738 --> 00:26:05,405
No!
535
00:26:07,241 --> 00:26:08,909
What was different this time?
536
00:26:08,910 --> 00:26:10,010
I have no idea.
537
00:26:10,011 --> 00:26:11,812
We have to remember
everything we did.
538
00:26:11,813 --> 00:26:12,813
Oh, I'll remember.
539
00:26:14,048 --> 00:26:15,716
Should we do it again
just to make sure?
540
00:26:15,717 --> 00:26:18,118
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
541
00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:21,254
That doctor was a genius.
542
00:26:23,091 --> 00:26:24,558
Oh, shit. What time is it?
543
00:26:24,559 --> 00:26:25,959
Seriously?
544
00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:27,527
We missed our show.
545
00:26:27,528 --> 00:26:28,528
What show?
546
00:26:28,529 --> 00:26:29,663
"What show?"
547
00:26:29,664 --> 00:26:30,764
Oh!
548
00:26:30,765 --> 00:26:32,499
Right, it's Saturday!
549
00:26:34,669 --> 00:26:37,037
- Oh, well.
- Oh, yeah.
550
00:26:40,475 --> 00:26:41,942
Unbelievable.
551
00:26:41,943 --> 00:26:45,312
We lost to something called
"Storage Wars: Texas"?
552
00:26:45,313 --> 00:26:47,930
Which was a repeat, by the way.
553
00:26:47,931 --> 00:26:50,817
We also lost to "Wicked Tuna,"
554
00:26:50,818 --> 00:26:54,454
"Jerseylicious," "Swamp People."
555
00:26:54,455 --> 00:26:57,157
Oh, shit.
I missed "Swamp People."
556
00:26:57,158 --> 00:26:58,895
This is not good, you guys.
557
00:26:58,896 --> 00:27:00,293
All right, but this is
just the first week.
558
00:27:00,294 --> 00:27:03,371
They've got to give the audience
a chance to find us.
559
00:27:03,372 --> 00:27:07,467
I mean, they've got to, right?
560
00:27:22,357 --> 00:27:26,767
Sync and corrected by Elderfel
www.addic7ed.com
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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