Original subtitles

[snoring] [clock ringing]

[upbeat music]

[cheerful music]

The picnic basket's all packed. Where's this forest we're going to?

I have a map. It's a remote area.

No one takes care of the animals there or feeds them.

You love feeding animals, don't you?

Ha! Look who's talking. Speaking of which, where are...

Odie's watching a fairy tale on TV and Garfield's upstairs asleep.

-[whining] -[television]

He should be waking up any minute now.

[snoring]

[yawning]

What a strange dream.

I was eating linguini and clams.

Usually on Tuesday, I dream about eating fettuccine and clams.

Let's see what time it is. Oh, no! I'm missing my favorite show!

-[Odie whimpering] -Search the kingdom to find his love...

[crashing]

Thanks, Odie! I almost missed Eddie Gourmand.

[Odie whining]

Today, he's going to take a look at spaghetti and meatballs.

[Odie whining]

Welcome to my show, people! Welcome, welcome, welcome.

On today's show, we're going to look at spaghetti and meatballs!

[lively music]

[Garfield drooling]

Isn't this wonderful?

This is the best show on TV, apart from mine, of course.

[Odie whining]

I gained three pounds just watching it.

[Odie whining]

You'd rather watch some fairy tale than look at spaghetti and meatballs?

[Odie whining]

-Sheesh. -For those of you who just joined us,

we'll be looking at this plate of spaghetti and meatballs for an hour!

[laughing] Oh, and tomorrow is Chinese food day.

We'll be looking at Moo Goo Gai Pan, shrimp in oyster sauce, chow mein--

-[changing channels] -He'd finally found her...

Fairy tales are silly.

I could make up a better story than this.

-[Odie whining] -[Garfield sighing]

Liz and I are leaving. We'll be back late. Enjoy yourselves!

We will.

-And don't get into any trouble. -We will.

[Odie whining]

You want me to read you a fairy tale?

[Odie whimpering]

I have important things to do. Naps! More naps! Naps during other naps!

[Odie whining]

-[sighing] -[Odie whimpering]

-Oh, ok. Wait here a moment. -[Odie yipping]

[grunting]

[giggling]

Oh!

Ah! Ham and cheese on sourdough with brown mustard...

That picnic basket looked heavy.

It seemed lighter just now.

About the weight of a ham and cheese on sourdough.

[engine revving]

Hmm.

-Ah. This one will do. -[Odie giggling]

What? All right, let's see.

"Once upon a time..." I've read this story!

[Odie whining]

Hey, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

Ok. "Once upon a time, there was an extremely handsome cat..."

Want to know how handsome this cat was?

-[Odie whining] -That handsome!

[lively music]

♪ Who is the cat who people celebrate? Me ♪

♪ It's me ♪

♪ Who is the one they all appreciate? Me ♪

♪ Yes, me ♪

♪ Who is the slyest? Who's on the rise? ♪

♪ As you can see, me Still me ♪

♪ Who is the highest? Who takes the prize? ♪

♪ Me Not you ♪

♪ Who wins the test above the rest? ♪

♪By now you've guessed ♪

♪ You're impressed, and I'm so blessed ♪

[crowd cheering]

♪ I must suggest it's me ♪

♪ The very best is me ♪

[medieval music]

[Garfield] He lived a quiet but happy life within the castle.

Sometimes he would eat.

[gobbling]

And sometimes he would sleep.

[snoring]

[snoring]

And sometimes he would eat and sleep.

[snoring and gobbling]

-[Odie whining] -Saves time.

"The magnificent cat's life was good. Except for three problems."

[bird chirping]

[Garfield] One was an extremely dim-witted dog

that was always asking him to throw a stick so it could be fetched.

[whining]

-[Odie whining] -It says so.

You think I'm making this up?

[whining]

[lively music]

Fine. Let's move on. Where was I?

Oh, yes. Asking him to throw a stick so it could be fetched.

-[dog whining] -[Garfield sighing]

[barking]

All right, all right. Just to be rid of you.

[medieval music]

[barking]

[panting]

For those of you who don't know,

this is called a catapult.

The catapult is an ancient weapon invented by Greek soldiers

to hurl boulders at their enemies.

[whining]

But it's even handier for this.

[barking]

See you sometime around Halloween!

So the dog with the long tongue was one of his problems.

Another was the prince's twin nieces.

[both] There he is! There's the kitty cat!

Oh, no!

-Wait, kitty cat! -We want to play with you!

Stop! Kitty cat! Where are you?

We have gowns for you! Let's do a fitting!

-Let's give him a bath! -Two baths!

-Scrub his tail! -Clean his eyes!

[screaming]

There he is! There's the kitty cat!

I am so doomed.

Let's play dress-up!

-Let's do his eyebrows! -Stop! Call the palace guard!

Call the royal babysitter! Call the fashion police! Help!

-He'll smell so sweet! -He'll look gorgeous.

The worst is I don't look good in this color.

-[Odie giggling] -[Garfield groaning]

And the cat's third problem was his master's problem.

Prince Jon had to find a bride, and he needed one soon.

But I do not want to marry any of the women at the royal ball last night.

Look, I'm just the royal food taster around here, but I know this:

Royal law says that if you don't marry by your 21st birthday,

the next in line becomes king.

And you know who the next in line is.

Huh?

Next in line was the royal viceroy.

And he was not a nice man at all.

Attention, peasants.

When I take charge, I'll be instituting some new taxes.

[gasps]

Let's see... Tax on inhaling, tax on exhaling,

tax on holding your breath, tax on not breathing at all.

I protest these taxes!

Tax on protesting these taxes.

[jeering]

A tax on tying your shoes, a tax on wearing loafers...

What if we go barefoot?

A tax on going barefoot. Thank you.

A tax on thumbtacks,

a tax on putting ketchup on a cheese sandwich...

[sighing] His greed will destroy this kingdom.

Which is why you need to find a bride and soon!

Like, tomorrow.

[sighing]

[epic music]

Then marry I shall!

Even if I have to marry the next woman who walks in the door.

Well, maybe I could keep looking for a little longer.

He doesn't look good in that color.

He had been dining with every available maiden in the kingdom

and was down to the last three.

People say you have to help humanity. I say: What's humanity ever done for me?

-Strike one. -[bell chiming]

Me, me. Me, me, me.

Me, me, me, me, me.

Me, me, me, me, me, me.

Me. Me, me, me, me, me.

Me, me, me, me, me and only me.

Must you speak only about yourself?

You're right, Prince Jon. Let's speak about you now.

What do you think of me?

[groaning]

-Strike two! -[bell chiming]

[noisily gobbling]

So, tell me a little about yourself.

I'd like to get to know you. [sighing]

-Strike three! -[bell chiming]

She's out! Boy, can you imagine trying to live with someone like that?

[noisily gobbling]

It was about that the not-so-smart dog finally got back with the stick.

Oh, hi. Well, it looks like the prince will never find a bride.

The evil viceroy will be our new king.

Bad for the kingdom, but I don't care that much.

Nothing that evil, power-mad guy does will affect me.

A tax on watching cartoon shows,

a tax on blinking, a tax on dancing with a monkey.

See? That doesn't affect me.

A tax on vigorous exercise.

See? It really doesn't affect me.

A tax on eating pasta, tomato sauce

or anything that contains cheese.

See? None of these things affect me.

[gasping] A tax on pasta? No! No! No, no! Unfair!

Tax Brussels sprouts! Tax health food!

Tax anything with yogurt in it! Just don't tax lasagna!

Pup, we have to stop that man! We have to help Prince Jon find a wife!

[yipping]

"The brilliant cat and the not-brilliant dog were determined to--"

Oh, wait. Time for a burrito break. Wait here.

And don't you go anywhere, either. I'll be back in one burrito.

[whimpering]

[lively music]

[upbeat music]

Subtitling: ECLAIR