Original subtitles

[instrumental music]

[theme song]

♪ Whenever there's a crime or trouble ♪

♪ That no one can solve at all it seems ♪

♪ That's when they come and on the double ♪

♪ Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries ♪

♪ It might be day or night whenever ♪

♪ Conditions are right for them to flee ♪

♪ Somehow it all still fits together ♪

♪ Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries ♪

♪ If there's a full moon ♪

♪ An old house with rotten stairs ♪

♪ Just look around you ♪

♪ Chances are we'll be there ♪

♪ Someday I'll eat that darn canary ♪

♪ And then I'll be happy yes siree ♪

♪ But Hector thinks you should be wary ♪

♪ Sylvester and Tweety Mysteries ♪

♪ The chase goes on with each new mission ♪

♪ With backdrops a-plenty globally ♪

♪ And through it all they're in contention ♪

♪ Sylvester and Tweety ♪

♪ Mysteries ♪♪

[instrumental music]

(Sylvester) First, a mystery client hires Granny

then she puts us on a plane

of federal prosecutors and judges

who were en route to some kind of vacation retreat.

Then it gets strange.

We're over the target.

Hit the suit, fellas.

Geronimo!

[yelling]

grunt

Chessboard Acreage welcomes you to Happy Pet Village

where the pet is king.

Good! We're just in time for the 11 o'clock tour.

meow

Try to blend in.

[Hector growls]

[dogs barking]

vroom

Hmm. This all seems too perfect.

See, folks? I am a boy.

Here you will witness the cutting edge in pet products.

'Not to mention airline meals and insect poison.'

Meow!

[clears throat] Congratulations.

You lucky feline are the one billionth patron

of our Pewter Scratching Post.

As test pussy one billion

'you'll be first to sample our latest cat food'

the fabulous Molt-A-Munch.

(Granny) Oh, wow!

[all cheering]

(Tweety) 'Eww! That looks like a molten canawy.'

How disgusting.

chomp chomp chomp

Hmm. As a placebo, not bad.

But no substitute for the real enchilada.

Hmm?

[alarm beeping]

slush

chomp chomp chomp

Aah! Stop the taste test! Look!

- Too late. - Ah!

Better tell its owner.

thud

Hold it. Why not direct the owner to our hospitality suite?

Uh, but, sir, we need to inform her

of all possible side effects.

Shut up and have some ice cream.

I'll handle this.

Ma'am, we must inform you that your feline

may exhibit certain temporary side effects

from this first test batch of our fabulous Molt-A-Munch.

Side effects? What side effects?

Occasional double vision, and the colors pink and yellow

could reverse themselves.

But, hey, here's a 10,000 piece

blister pack of free doggie chew toys

as our way of being a good corporate citizen.

So, uh, let's not talk about this to anyone.

Especially the press, okay?

Well, that's all very good, but what about my pussycat?

Pish posh! I feel great.

Except I'm still hungry.

Chessboard Acreage has prepared to offer you

a choice of one cat chew toy

or a private VIP tour of our research facilities.

I'll take that tour!

- 'Mmm.' - Uh, sorry, Sylvester.

Sheesh. It's a dog's world.

I just live in it.

He's using our patented pit spoon

completely free of confrontational

pointy interfaces.

Huh?

squeak squeak squeak

Hey, that sounds just like me.

[screams]

[screams]

grunt

[groaning]

[groaning]

[grunting]

[growling]

[Sylvester screams]

(Sylvester) 'Snakes in the cog.'

[bird chirping]

Well, howdy?

Mmm, mmm.

Where'd that pipsqueak get to?

(Tweety) 'Over here, puddy.'

Gotcha, you little..

Hmm, pink?

Ah-ha! It started already.

[screams]

I'd say, it was done.

[groaning]

[laughs]

The name's Tweety.

How come you sound just like me, but you're pink?

I'm Orson, a canary just like you.

I was born yellow and turned pink naturally.

That plus the fact that I got fed every new batch

of test seed Chessboard Acreage ever made.

Strange. I was born pink and turned yellow.

You must be doing it backwards.

[groaning]

Let's have some fun with that bad old puddy cat.

Perhaps I just ate too much, then ran too hard.

- Yeah, that's gotta be it. - Hiya, puddy.

Argh.

Hey. Where'd he go?

Over here, you hair ball.

screech

P-p-pink?

[screams]

(Sylvester) 'Mm, must be that pink-yellow side effect.'

crash

If you ask me, this is the best part of the tour.

- You said it. - 'Mm-hm.'

(Granny) 'Sylvester? Tweety?'

That's Gwanny.

Say, what's in here?

Oh, that's off-limits.

We're always pushing the envelope at Chessboard Acreage.

A competition you'd love to know what's in there too.

'He-he. Sorry.'

[cell phone ringing]

Um, pardon me a minute.

[cell phone ringing]

You're right on time. 1200 hours.

Where do I go from this coordinates?

(computer) 'You must get inside the off-limits research building.'

beep beep beep

(male #1) 'It's another mysterious call to Granny's number'

'from inside Happy Pet Village.'

'It's coming from our empty test lab'

'same as the others.'

Security, meet me here at the lab.

Let's get to the bottom of this.

[gasps] Oh, I'm sorry. End of tour.

Something's come up. Please exit Happy Pet Village this way.

(Granny) 'Oh! But I didn't get enough free chew toys for Hector.'

'Let me off this thing.'

[Hector grunting]

- Stop! - Au revoir.

Oops, looks like Gwanny needs help.

Let's use our pal for that.

gloop

Oh, looks like Pokemon.

grunt

Yoo-hoo! Puddy.

There goes that naked genius now.

- Gotcha! - Hey, let me go.

No, I've got you right where I..

gasp

Huh? Hm..

[screams]

[party horn wailing]

I'm seeing double.

[screams]

boom

Thank goodness, something shorted that thing out.

This is our stop, Hector.

I want this lab taken apart down to the rivets.

No one must discover Chessboard Acreages' plan

to breed a super race of destructive insects.

Just so we can corner the market on unlicensed, overpriced

nuclear fly squatters.

[man laughing]

Too late, someone just did.

[all gasp]

grunt

Take 'em away, boys.

You know, it's lawyers like you

that make our federal justice system look silly.

(computer voice) 'Congratulations, Granny.'

At last, I meet my client.

Uh, who and where are you?

- I see some houseflies. - Precisely.

We had to defend to our species.

- So we hired you. - But how did you learn to talk?

It's amazing what you can pick up

pushing the envelope with science.

What they can't do nowadays.

[groans] You can say that again.

gasp

whirr

Ow!

We lose more puddy cats that way.

[theme music]