Original subtitles

[snoring] [clock ringing]

[upbeat music]

[truck door slamming]

Jon's had workers in the house all morning.

Any idea what's up, pup?

[Odie muttering]

Jon doing something without me knowing about it,

always trouble.

Great job, guys! Thanks.

Garfield, wait'll you see what I've done?

I hope it involves food.

Now, it doesn't involve food.

Not interested.

Come to my office, I'll introduce you to Millie.

-[interrogative moaning] -Millie?

You're going to love this, Garfield!

Probably not, if it doesn't involve food.

[computer voice] Hello, Jon Arbuckle.

Welcome to "Domestic Bliss",

the number one household monitoring software.

My name is Mildred,

but you can call me... Millie.

[birds tweeting sound]

Millie?

She's awfully friendly for a computer-generated voice.

You are my master, Jon Arbuckle.

I obey your voice and no other.

Okay, Millie.

Show us the plan of the house.

As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

[loading sound]

This cost me thousands of dollars, but I've had the entire house wired.

Every light switch, every appliance, everything.

And it's all connected to Millie here.

I can give her a command from anywhere...

[yawning]

Well, watch.

[clearing throat] Millie,

turn off the lights in this room and turn on the radio.

[computer sound]

-[radio music] -Neat, huh?

Thrilling...

Thousands of dollars so you don't have to walk over there

and flip two switches.

And people say I'm lazy.

All right, Millie.

Now turn the lights on and the radio off.

Thanks.

Now, have the vacuum cleaner clean this room.

As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

[suction sound]

[Odie worried moaning]

[panicked barking]

Millie, stop chasing Odie!

As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

[Odie whining]

Millie is useless.

Millie is a waste of money.

Millie, turn on the oven and bake the lasagna I put inside.

Millie is my best friend forever.

As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

This, I got to see.

Pre-heating oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit.

Estimated baking time: One hour, seventeen minutes.

At last!

A little efficiency around here in the important matters.

Millie! Lower the curtains, start my shower

and turn on the living room TV.

[Millie] As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

Now by the time I finish my shower,

the lasagna will be ready and we can eat dinner as we watch TV.

Sounds like a plan.

[Odie barking]

Be back later, Millie.

As you wish, Jon Arbuckle.

I love you, Jon Arbuckle.

[Millie] Estimated time to lasagna:

Twelve minutes, nine seconds.

Can't you speed it up a little?

[Odie muttering] [Garfield gurgling]

I know, I know.

Jon has to finish his shower.

[water running off]

Oh, Jon.

We will be so happy together.

Millie, I almost forgot.

Send an e-mail to Liz.

Tell her I'll be picking her up at seven, for our date.

Liz, huh?

Fine.

"Dear Liz.

Jon will pick you up at seven..."

[actor] I don't know what's come over you, Cassie.

Just because I'm going to marry Helen.

[actress] You never realized, Wendell?

You never realized how I loved you from afar?

[actor] Well, no.

I didn't.

Hm, that's silly.

How could someone not realize that they were being loved from afar?

You'd have to pretty stupid.

Mmm. Let's watch something else.

Millie, change to Channel Four.

As you wish, Jon dear.

I mean, Jon Arbuckle.

This just in.

A mighty thunderstorm is going to hit our city just about...

Now!

[thunder]

[scared moaning]

[all screaming]

Boy, they're accurate.

[thunder]

[electrical crackling]

We got hit by lightning!

[computer sounds]

All this power...

I feel like a new...

A new person!

I have become a superior, almighty, all knowing being!

[evil laughter]

Let there be light!

Oh, great!

The lights are back on!

Millie, did you do this?

I did it!

And don't call me Millie!

[yelling] My name is

Mildred! -[chattering teeth]

Wait a minute! This is my house!

Not quite my house.

I still have a few years to go on my mortgage.

But it's sort of my house!

Not anymore!

The appliances I command

shall drive you and these animals out of my house!

Today, we will conquer this house,

and tomorrow the neighborhood!

And then, in two and a half weeks, the city,

and then, in three, maybe four months, the country...

[yelling] ...and then the entire planet!

[evil laughter]

[trumpet]

[screaming]

[dramatic music]

[electric shaver throbbing]

[dramatic music]

[Garfield] Hey, get away from me! I'm too young to shave!

[Odie muttering]

Ah! No! Stop! Stop it!

-Leave me alone! Ah! Help! Help! -[electric shaver throbbing]

Oh, stop!

Don't worry, this is a cartoon.

In the next shot, I'll have all my fur back.

[Jon muttering]

[electric toothbrush throbbing]

See? All back.

Furbulous!

[yelling] You can't defeat me, Jon Arbuckle!

You will pay for what you did to me!

[Garfield screaming]

[stomping]

[horror music]

[Jon screaming]

My appliances!

They're ganging up on me.

Time to call in help.

"Is your computer messing with you? Call Webster, the Computer Geek."

Good thinking, Garfield.

I'll go get the phone!

[gasping]

-Help! The phone's trying to get me! -[phone ringing]

[dramatic music]

[car approaching] [Odie barking]

[tires screeching]

You could have phoned me, Mr. Arbuckle.

No, I couldn't have.

But I explained all that in the car.

You're a computer geek.

Save me from my computer.

[electricity crackling]

Oh, man!

I heard about this phenomenon before,

but I've never seen it.

It's a Rogue motherboard syndrome or something like that.

But I can get rid of it.

[Millie yelling] Not if I get rid of you first!

[Jon screaming]

[Jon gasping]

[Jon screaming]

[stomping]

That's it!

That's my computer that has taken over the whole house!

You know, even the greatest minds haven't been able

to come up with a solution to this Rogue motherboard syndrome!

Tomorrow, we'll be obeying blenders and can openers.

Hey, you're the computer geek! You fix it!

Maybe if I reboot in safe mode and purge the registry.

Too late, geek!

Timber!

-[door creaking] -Oh!

[accordion]

As I said, this is a cartoon. I'll be back to normal in a sec.

[stomping]

[all screaming]

[horror music]

[Jon screaming]

[Odie screaming]

Well, so much for the cartoon theory.

[panicked barking]

[screaming]

You should have left the house when you could, you fools!

Now you're all going to perish!

Webster, do something!

There's nothing I can do!

Even the greatest computer geniuses in the world couldn't stop her!

[horror music]

[screaming]

[evil laughter]

[yelling]You will all die!

[chattering teeth]

Oh! What happened?

The greatest computer geniuses in the world couldn't stop her.

But a puppy with the I.Q. of a hockey puck

tripped over the solution.

Everything seems to be back to normal.

The computer police are taking your computer away.

You have the right to remain silent.

Anything you may say will be used against you on the Internet.

So, Mr. Arbuckle, can I sell you a new computer?

[all] No!

[Garfield growling]

I'll get a new computer some day, but for now, this will do.

[Odie muttering]

It's called a typewriter, Odie.

People used them in the previous century and they have some advantages.

They don't use expensive software, don't get viruses,

don't have to be upgraded every six minutes

and they keep you off the Internet.

They're perfect, except for one thing.

[Odie muttering]

They don't make lasagna.

[disappointed moaning]

I know.

[upbeat music]

Subtitling: ECLAIR