Original subtitles

- Did you take my charger last night? - Yes.

Why do you take my things?

Mine didn't work.

I don't care, that's your problem. Now I've no charge to go!

Then share a little.

No, I won't share. You had yours. Two, in fact!

My charger!

You screw yours up!

I'll confiscate it.

May I talk?

Hey... See? You made Chloé cry.

I'm a big girl, I don't need...

What? It's empty!

He ate it all!

My banker offered us an appointment at 6pm to go over the loan offers!

OK, Gilles?

Who has the Chocopate? You again?

Yeah, and?

I didn't have one spoonful.

That's good news!

A loan for what?

Ludo, we didn't even tell him!

We found our home. Our dream house!

- Our palace. - Very good... It's really good.

But I'd like to give the kitchen a coat of paint. I was thinking lilac.

Do you have a bank behind you?

My mom's our guarantor.

Oh dear, yes.

- I'll loan my cereals! - Don't play with food.

Yes, it's super, really super.

I mean, I'm a bit sad obviously but it's super for you.

Don't get carried away until we've signed.

Oh don't worry... Afterwards I'll have to clean!

You owe me respect, I'm the eldest! Stop it!

- You're a pain. - No!

Eat your cereals!

Ah, business is picking up.

Robin, this city needs us!

Why am I Robin?

Because times are changing, Robin.

Don your cape and tights.

HIP HIGH INTELLECTUAL POTENTIAL

- Hi, Gilles. You OK? - Huh...

What do we have?

Valentin Béliard, 17.

Oh shit.

We found his papers on his moped.

His parents have a farm in the next village.

We found his charred body in that barn.

Might it have been an accident?

At first sight.

The firefighters said a spark would be enough to start a fire.

We found cigarette butts in the barn.

OK.

Didn't you mention a moped? What's wrong?

What?

"CHILD OF"

Oh fuck!

I had the same one as a kid.

What is this circus, Morgane?

What's wrong?

What the fuck! You've just been reinstated in the police!

When will your bullshit stop?

Wow, you undid the second button?

Standards are slipping! What's going on?

- What? - Have you met someone?

Oh yes.

You've met someone!

Karadec!

I don't believe it, he has a girlfriend!

Karadec! Push me to get me going!

Probably suffocation.

C02 has a paralyzing effect, in 30 seconds you're intoxicated.

Given the state of the body, this may take longer than usual.

And the identification?

Luckily he wore fireproof boots.

I've something you might be interested in.

The victim has a tattoo on his right ankle.

I'll spare you the rest.

A tribal sign.

May I?

- Have you changed perfume? - Huh?

No, not at all, Morgane.

There's a smell of grapefruit.

Oh, it's here.

Oh fuck, yes.

It's a super-strong disinfectant for surfaces.

It's what they use in rest homes.

Can't mess with the old!

I remember it was very inflammable.

Oh yes, look.

Oh fuck!

Don't move!

Karadec?

Karadec? Are you there?

Karadec?

You freaked me out.

You were lucky there! OK?

No, I'm not!

Hang on, you can thank me! But for me you'd be a kebab!

I should thank you?!

You just burned me!

My jacket's ruined!

Oh, chill..

OK, I get it! Arson!

It's a homicide, thank you!

Hence my demonstration.

It made sense.

Again, I'm sorry about your jacket, stop sulking.

Let's change the subject. So...

you took your conquest to Ranir's?

Did she like the samosas?

Wait, it wasn't Ranir's?

Must have been really serious.

Hey, you didn't even tell me where you met her.

And then... is it a match sexually?

What? Don't tell me you haven't yet... Huh?

Morgane, you and I are just colleagues.

So private lives remain private, OK?

OK. So you haven't yet...

Haven't yet what?

Had sex!

Is this the time?

Sorry I spoke!

Hello,, Major Karadec, police, Morgane Alvaro, consultant.

Are you Valentin's brother?

What's going on?

I don't understand. Vai was quiet.

He had no problems with anybody.

When did you last see him?

It was... Friday night?

No news since and you're not worried?

No, he said he was going partying with friends. We're used to it.

"Get well soon".

Did something happen to him?

Valentine had an accident months ago in the grain silo.

We were very worried but he'd gotten over it.

I'm sorry, I know it's hard but I must ask you to identify

this tattoo..

Is it Valentin's?

Yes.

Thank you.

You and I are just colleagues. So private lives remain private.

Who allowed you to come here?

Where's Ninon? She's not in her box.

She was stolen two days ago. Our champion.

Are you looking into my son's death or Ninon's disappearance?

Well, it's mounting up.

Your son's death, your stolen cow.

Don't you think they're linked?

Please leave.

A beast like that must be worth at least 10,000 euros, right?

Arlaud, the local breeder, offered me 14.

14,000. And you refused?

She's not for sale, especially not to that vulture Arlaud.

OK.

Oh I've done it..

Old Belliard finally spoke to me.

As Valentin and his father refused

to sell Ninon, Arlaud was upset.

As revenge he started telling everyone the Béliards are broke,

they can't care for their animals, etc...

Valentin was mad. At the last market, he kicked his ass in public.

It could end there. Only this is Dallas!

So three days later, the cow disappears.

So Arlaud stole it?

That's what Valentin thought.

So Arlaud kills Valentin

and burns the barn to make it look like an accident?

It's an option.

Let's go ask Arlaud a few questions.

And Morgane, if you could avoid your usual show...

- My usual show? - Yes.

What usual show? I don't even know what you mean.

Ninon!

Yoo-hoo, Ninon!

What's your number?

Say moo!

Ninon?

What's your colleague doing?

Answer the question, Mr Arlaud.

Did you see Valentin after your clash at the market?

No.

No? No news?

No.

Nor his cow, the one you coveted?

- No again. - Oh the big liar.!

You're a big liar.

Tada...!

Major Karadec, this is Ninon.

Ninon, this is Major Karadec.

What nonsense.

That's not Ninon!

Oh yeah?

All my cows are on file. I have all the papers.

Yes, these earrings are really handy.

Because thanks to them we know the order of birth of each one.

For example, if we go by the numbers,

she was born the same year as the two darlings over there.

That is, two years ago.

That's what you'd like us to believe!

However, if we go by the bulges

at the base of the horns due to growth...

the first appears at three years old

and they add one, finer and finer, each year...

Well, this sweetie is 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 years old.

Like Ninon!

Yes, seven years ago was the year of the Ns.

So what happened, Mr Arlaud?

Did Valentin return to see you and it degenerated?

No, it was Valentin who sold me Ninon.

Undeclared. He needed money.

Do you have proof of what you claim?

Well? You can see I didn't hurt the kid!

I gave him his 14,000 and he left as alive as he arrived.

You know why he needed the money?

You think we tell each other secrets? We weren't really friends.

Look, he was followed.

Are you Valentin's brother?

That's Théo's car.

By selling Ninon, Valentin compromised the farm's future.

Which is you. You're going to take over, right?

You can't be happy with this sale.

I was angry, yes,

but I didn't kill him.

We just talked.

I've always known I wanted to take over the farm.

For Valentin it was a bit different.

Meaning?

He didn't want to be a cattle breeder.

Things got a bit tense with my father.

Did he sell the cow to provoke your father?

He said he had an emergency.

He needed money, he'd pay it all back quickly...

- What emergency? - I don't know.

He wouldn't say.

If your brother had problems I must know.

I swear I don't know what he got himself into.

I want to find whoever did this to Val too!

No, his motive is too fragile.

He has no alibi for the murder.

For now, well release him and save custody time.

Follow the money.

Why did Valentin need it? To do what?

Everyone stay until we have something.

I'm off, I've an appointment with the bank.

Three may not be enough.

No, this is a very important meeting.

- Very important. - Very!

Can you glance at this now you're trained?

Morgane, I said everyone.

You know Karadec has a girlfriend?

Yes!

No, impossible! I'd know.

Wouldn't I, boss?

So you told Morgane but not us!

I must admit..

I told nobody.

Well, I'll be frank.

Though Sir's file is reassuring, Madame's is...

25 years a customer and not once in credit at the end of theVnonth.

OK, Morgane isn't a great manager.

But I'll help her rationalize it all.

Did she tell you she got a contract?

Oh yes... Champagne!

No, I'm sorry but your debt ratio exceeds 33%

and I can't grant a loan above 33% debt.

I understand.

Don't you realize you're letting go of the goose that lays golden eggs?

Goose with golden eggs?

You know how much I've brought you in our 25-year relationship?

This year alone, how much have I paid in charges?

I'll tell you. 1,647 euros!

So with an average debt ratio of - what? - 230 per month,

an interest rate on debit sums which was at 8% in 2010

and which you increased to 12% in 2017,

number of days overdrawn per year,

between 186 and 224 days...

multiplied by 25

gives us the tidy sum of 49,740,

Mr. Jamain.

It would have made a nice deposit. Compare that with

one of your more 'reasonable' clients,

one to whom you wouldn't hesitate to grant a loan.

How much have you made from them?

What are we talking? 20 for the account,

5 for online management and 3 for sending a checkbook?

That's not a lot, Mr. Jamain.

Thank you, sir.

I want you and I to move on to a win/win relationship.

Win/win, see?

I let you imagine the amount of my charges

if I get this loan and go to 350 overdraft per month.

It's dizzying, Mr Jamain. Dizzying!

So how do we go about it?

Right... Well, I'll see what I can do.

Win/Win.

You amazed me.

You always forget to pay your taxes but still bamboozle your banker!

I'm glad all the anti-capitalist sit-ins were of some use.

Well played! What time is it? I have to call the notary!

Hey, psst!

- Psst! - What?

What's yours on?

Oh, passing trains.

And you?

A guy burned in a barn.

Oh. Quite different.

Want to swap?

OK.

This high school student

lives on a farm. He has a moped.

Every day he goes back and forth between his home

and his technical school 8km away.

Easy. He does 16km every day.

Yes, but there's more.

His moped drinks 4 liters every 100km.

Yeah, that's 4l/100km!

After how many days must our schoolboy fill up?

Every 6.25 days.

Yes!

Check, Alvaro!

OK, so the question is:

why did Valentin fill up three times a week? .

He wasn't really going to school?

Exactly!

And where was he going?

For that I need more data.

I'll give you the entire file!

What? But I have homework!

You may have a flash. Give me your trains, they'll take 2 seconds...

OK, is that clear to everyone?

- Yes. - Yes? No? OK!

What do we know?

Valentin wasn't going to agricultural school!

But every day he went

somewhere within a radius of 40km around the farm.

The thousand-euro question is where!

It's too big!

How do we know where he was going

Well your luck's in, because I have a bionic eye

and saw Valentin's cigarettes had a foreign customs stamp on them.

The stamp had a drawing on it:

a knight overcoming a dragon.

George of Lydda, alias Saint George, 4th-century martyr.

Eliott had a tedious Medieval fixation.

St George, patron saint of chivalry, of gunsmiths and, guess...

Georgia.

Georgia, would you believe.

Yes, Georgia and the dragon!

Right. Georgia, which gets its name from him.

So Valentin's ciggies were Georgian.

Great, but what do I do with that?

- What am I looking for? - You can all join in

the interactive game.

Brainstorming... Georgia: what does that evoke?

Yeah, not much.

Yes, it's often people whose name ends in "shvili".

It means "child of". Pretty, huh?

And so...?

Daphné, check within a 40km perimeter for a name ending in shvili?

Shvili, well played, Karadec!

- Thanks. - A great team.

Shvili... there's a bar in Lille owned by Otar Baratashvili!

See? Your jacket's fine.

It's another one.

Really?

You have doubles of all your clothes?

You're freaky, Karadec.

Hi boss, we OK?

Hello. Can I get you anything?

- Well... - No, thanks.

But can we buy some cigarettes?

Sorry, I'm not a pop-up shop.

We know you sell them under the counter.

Is it because we're not regulars?

We're not here for trafficking.

Do you know this man?

Yes, he comes to help out every Saturday.

He lives in a studio in the building opposite.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

Very nice Georgian sausage!

Who is Lana?

magine he has a secret liaison.

A secret liaison!

That reminds me of someone.

Nothing is secret! I don't have to explain my love life to anyone.

- No, of course not. - OK?

- There's no answer. - No.

So?

- I'll ask the caretaker to let us in. - Right!

Come on, at least tell me her name.

I don't know her, so...?

No!

You said too much or not enough. It's unbearable!

- I said nothing. - Exactly!

That's not nice.

I mean...

I tell you lots of things, with you it's...

compartmentalized!

I swear...

It's all work, work, work.

If we're to spend every day together,

we could tell each other stuff.

Look, apparently his girlfriend was doing sports.

Oh yeah.

Freeze or I blow you away!

Oh, fuck.

Let go!

Defend yourself.

I'm calling the police.

Gently, gently.

The Police are here.

Marcel, sit!

It's Marcel? Hi, Marcel!

Oh fuck...

Yes but we call you. you don't come. We don't call you, you turn up.

Just last weekend I called them

because three guys were smoking in the elevator. Nobody came!

And the previous Monday,

the upstairs neighbor quarreled with her sister until 8.30.

Hang on, let me check:

best to be exact:

8.25pm.

So you note all the comings and goings?

- That's right. - OK.

You know the couple who live here?

Of course. Very nice youngsters. Very discreet,

no problems.

Can you describe the young woman?

Brunette,

very flirtatious, always well dressed.

A pretty little girl!

- And you last saw them... - The young man on Saturday,

and I saw her in the hall yesterday.

She wasn't very chatty.

She had a bag, I imagined she was going away.

What did it look like?

I'll tell you...

A gray and blue bag with an orange strap.

Valentin's bag with the money.

We know Valentin lived with a certain Lana

who left with the 14,000 from the sale of his parents' cow.

- What do we have on Lana? - Nothing.

No name on the lease nor on Valentin's social media.

Listen:

it's scientifically proven that being in love

lowers your concentration

and makes you less productive!

It's all clear now.

Lana may not be her real name.

She may be a crook.

She seduces Valentin...

pushes him to steal the cow,

kills him and splits with the dough. - Possible.

We found a sports jersey at Lana's.

Daphné, would you check local sports clubs

and see if Lana is a member.

There are at least 200. What do I do?

Wait! In the early stages of a relationship,

lovers match their clothing color without realizing. Funny!

No, it's not funny, Morgane, it's a drag.

OK, I'll help you.

I have to be going.

Oh, great team spirit.

I'm already late and want to call in at home.

Don't let up!

No, we won't let up.

You think he's..

Fucked...? No, not yet.

And I tell you... in those pants it won't be tonight.

For sure!

The real question is, with whom? We must know her.

I saw him smile at Sylviane from Accounts

and it wasn't a smile that... - No.

Sylviane?

Sylviane is with Gérard from general services.

So what?

Nathalie! From Archives...

Be serious, Gilles!

Nathalie, honestly! She's a nun!

Fuck, I know!

Diego from BRI!

Diego?

- He called three times this week! - No!

- Yes! - Never!

Just my type!

Yes... No, well, it's not... I'm uh...

He wouldn't sleep in the bathtub!

Morning!

You OK?

He fucked.

Loads

Forestier.

He fucked.

He fuc..

How's the search coming along?

Could you come to my office when you've a moment?

Will do.

Are you all right?

Yes.

Are you?

Nice evening?

Great.

I bet!

Daphné, how's the search going?

OK, Gilles?

For Lana's shirt, we contacted local clubs:

handball, volleyball, football, even curling, and got nowhere.

There's a Lana who bowls at Gerberoy but she's 50 and her club logo

isn't a boar. - We've nothing.

THE BOAR

You have doubles of clothes? You're freaky, Karadec!

IMPRO: Wazemmes Warthogs vs Béthune Hyenas.

THE WARTHOG

Oh damn, the logo isn't a boar, it's a warthog.

Lana's t-shirt...

It isn't a sports shirt.

It's an improvisation club t-shirt!

Wow, that feels good!

Doesn't it?

Yes.

Hello.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Race list. - Race list.

- Foot race. - Foot race.

- Heresy. - Heresy.

- Zigomar. - Zigomar.

- Maori. - Maori.

Oregano...

On The Run? Is that the game?

Who are you?

Hello everyone. Sorry to interrupt.

Major Karadec, police. Sorry to bother you.

We're looking for Lana. Is she in your group?

- Is she here? - She didn't come today.

What do you want?

Just to talk.

Oh yes.

We don't know where she is!

You can stop looking. Lana is dead.

What do you mean?

Remember the neighbor who notes all the comings and goings?

Well...

Valentin and Lana were never seen together.

One enters, then the other leaves.

In the apartment, we found girls' and boys' clothes,

shaving foam, make-up, but only one toothbrush.

And Valentin didn't look very far for "Lana".

Because Valentin and Lana are the same person.

Yes, I understood.

OK.

Lana is dead?

Yes.

Belts, please.

Belts!

How was his transition going?

I found this in his locker.

Female hormones, estrogen-based.

Did Valentin really want to become a woman or was it just to grow boobs?

Her name was Lana. And she took these to be what she always was.

I met Lana in hospital 6 months ago.

She was still Valentin then.

I'm her nurse, I looked after her.

But she was so ill at ease that I knew joining the troupe would help.

And I was right. She really became herself.

Who are you voting for. Lana?

I don't know. Jacques is bald and Jacqueline is blonde?

Six months? Was that after the silo accident?

An accident? Is that what his parents said?

Her mother.

But it wasn't an accident.

Lana was hospitalized after an attempted suicide.

She told her parents but her father

reacted so badly, she wanted to end it all.

So her parents knew?

Lana was a minor. Without her parents, she'd have no medical care.

That's why she sold Ninon. She needed money for her operation.

- When did you last see her? - Saturday,

before she went to get her things from home.

She wanted to try talking to her father,

give him a last chance of accepting her...

Car...

Yeah, difficult.

And accident.

Policy, car, accident...

I was at his birth.

It was the best day of my life.

Valentin was born a boy. He's a boy.

He wasn't going to be butchered to become a girl! Not my son...

Why didn't you tell us Lana came to see you?

His name was Valentin.

That night...

he told me that he'd made his decision.

That he was going to continue "his transition", as he called it...

What happened next, Mr Béliard?

Did you decide to sort him out?

I don't believe it!

What have you done to my son? Tell me!

Nothing! What do you take me for?

Théo told me he saw you come out of the cowshed.

You asked him to step aside and you were covered in blood!

He hit me, jumped on me,

called me a retarded yokel, so I defended myself.

Stop lying!

I pushed him!

He hit the barrier!

Stop it, Mom!

I didn't kill him!

I swear I didn't kill him!

I swear, if you hurt Valentin, I'd never get over it.

I told him to clear off.

To never set foot in our house again.

How I'd rather he were dead than have a degenerate son!

I didn't think that.

If I'd known..

Valentin!

Mr Béliard,

I'm arresting you for the murder of your son.

His wife thinks he's guilty, he has no alibi

but Valentin's father continues to deny the murder.

I've an appointment, I'm counting on you.

What is more important than solving a murder case mid-afternoon?

An appointment with the notary.

You've found your home? Is that it?

Wouldn't that be a little too personal a question?

Oh come on, I'm kidding you.

I'm a human being with a real heart so I'll answer: yes, we sign today!

That's terrific! Are you happy?

Yes... yes, I'm happy. Of course I am.

Great, then.

Why wouldn't I be happy?

- That's not what I mean. - Yes, I'm happy.

But that's not what I meant.

You and Ludo make a great couple, so if you're happy, so am I.

- See you later, then. - Yes.

He's seeing us between appointments. If we're late, forget it.

We'll be there in 10 minutes.

- Got your birth certificate? - Yes.

- Family album? - Yes.

Great, now we hit all the red lights!

We'll never get there.

Calm down.

You and Ludo make a great couple, so if you're happy, so am I.

- Hey! - What's up?

He fucked my mirror!

He didn't touch it!

Isn't my car red enough to see

Thought you'd run off? No!

You're not well!

You fucked my mirror.

Morgane...

You're sick!

We'll file a report. It's like a hit and run.

- I have an appointment! - And I don't?

Move, please!

No, you!

Can't you see we had an accident? Get back in your car.

I'm calling the police.

Morgane...

Yeah, yeah. So call the police.

- Slut! - What?

What did I tell you!

Major Karadec of Lille Police.

Who has better things to do!

I've been telling these assholes that we work together.

This is a major blunder. Some will end up in traffic.

It's already the case for you, but...

What?

Can you explain?

Do I have to?

OK. Has Ludo gone?

Yes.

So you missed the notary?

You got that right.

Oh yes?

We found cigarette butts in the barn.

Arson! It's a homicide, thank you!

Lana's been stringing us along from the start!

Thank you to the Béthune Hyenas

for their improvisation on "Joan of Arc eats a kebab".

And without further ado, we welcome the Warthogs of Wazemmes!

Yeah!

Warthogs! Warthogs!

For a mixed improvisation,

3 minutes long.

But is there in the audience

an impartial hand to draw a theme for the impro?

Me!!! Me, me, me, me, me!

Me... Here, hand me the mic.

Good evening Lille! Are you feeling good?

Yes!!!

I can't hear you! Feeling good?

I always dreamed of saying that. Yes, the paper.

The improvisation theme is: "Staging a fake death."

You're on, Warthogs!

I'll help you to start. So let's do a little sketch.

So let's say you have a friend who we'll call Lana

and she feels really bad about herself because

she was born a boy but always felt like a-woman.

Instead of supporting her her family rejected her.

How can we help her?

By staging her fake death!

Yeah!

Someone's following. Nice.

By faking his death, OK.

So for that you're going to need a body,

a tattoo and lots of inflammable chemicals to set it all on fire.

Role distribution.

You'll play the medical student

who recovers a body that no one will claim.

You may have seen this coming, but hey...

You're going to be a tattoo artist,

who will have to reproduce his friend's tattoo on the body.

So what will you do, Doriane?

What are you going to play?

I remember this as really inflammable. Oh yes, look. Oh fuck!

The nurse friend who gets chemicals from the hospital.

The nurse friend. Yes!

That's how Valentin can stage his death

and let Lana fly away...

That's all from me.

There's no point, it's too late. You won't find her.

Ah, there you are!

Accomplices from the start.

Brother-sister solidarity is sweet.

How did you find us?

The figures on your wrist.

It couldn't be a train or a plane, they'd log your identity.

So only coaches remained.

He has nothing to do with it. If you arrest anyone, arrest me.

You must let her go.

Please...

When I told my dad who I really was,

he just said I was sick and needed help.

I can't go back.

I need to go to the Netherlands, it could be a new life for me.

You know what we'll do?

I'll look in that direction

and you will take the opportunity to board your coach.

Then, as I have heels, I won't run after you. Will that do?

- I'll come see you. - Yes. Be careful.

Gabriel admitted body theft.

He'll be sentenced by the judge.

For the rest of the troupe, we don't have much.

And Lana?

Gone. She'll be charged with reporting an imaginary crime,

but the penalty isn't big enough for an international warrant.

So if she stays abroad, we've had it.

Where is Morgane, in fact?

No idea.

She'll be at home. You know her...

Yes.

- Hmm. - Yes.

- I'll warn the Béliards. - Great.

Don't go. We've something to announce.

Will they make it official?

She's probably pregnant.

They slept together last night. It's physiologically impossible.

Yes.

Answer, Ludo!

So...

Right.

We wanted to talk to you

to announce

that following good recent results, the prefect has upped our budget.

The equivalent of one extra patrol car.

That's your announcement?

That's great, an extra car.

Sometimes you're like spoiled brats...

So you're not sleeping together?

- Sorry? - What?

Oh sorry no... Sorry no, forgive me. Because we thought... I...

- We're reassured. - Yes, in fact.

No, because we thought that...

But...

OK...

- Oh yeah... - See you tomorrow.

Shall we go?

I know... It shocked me too.

Don't you think the car's good?

- Of course. - Of course.

Hello, it's me.

Did it go well with the children?

Oh Ludo, I'm sorry.

I know I messed up with the notary but...

- No, please. - I'll make it up to you.

I'll get another appointment. I'll save the day.

Morgane, I'll ask you a simple question:

Do you want to live with me or not?

- You've a doubt. - No.

- You've doubted from the start. - No!

But the thing is, I've never had a doubt. Ever.

No, wait, Ludo...

I'll come for my things tomorrow afternoon. Don't be here.

But let's talk... Ludo!

You'll never guess!

Karadec isn't going out with Céline!

It's that other traitress, Roxane Ascher!

Oh I saw Ludo... Does he go out at this time?

Morgane...

What?

- Are you OK? - Yes...

Yes.

Subtitles by Mark Goodwin for VECTRACOM