Original subtitles

[bluesy rock music]

♪ ♪

[video game music]

Um, Cody, you said

we could come over here and play your game,

and we've been watching you play

for, like, an hour. [snickers]

I didn't say you could play it.

I said you could see it.

Um, what?

It's called seeing.

You do it with your eyes, genius.

Damn it, Cody, we wanna play.

Yeah, yeah, I wanna shoot guys in the butt.

Yeah. [snickers]

I don't care. I hate you guys.

Cody, you suck

more than anyone has ever sucked.

- Yeah, and you suck. - Aw.

it's so good to see Cody is making friends.

What friends?

This is wonderful.

Cody, why don't you invite your new friends

for dinner, hmm? - But...

Beavis, do you like broccolini?

Is she, like, a chick or something?

So you two are Cody's new friends?

Uh, sir, we're just here

because we wanna play this video game.

It's turning into such a good year for Cody.

I knew it would happen sooner or later.

Uh, no, seriously, he's, like, kind of a butthole--

We're gonna do everything we can

to make it work out this time.

Dad, help me in the kitchen a minute?

Don't have too much fun without us. [laughs]

Get out of my house.

We're not leaving until we play the video game,

you butthole.

That's right. Yeah. [snickers] You said.

No matter how much this place sucks,

we will stay until we can shoot those guys

in the butt.

Yeah, exactly. [snickers]

Okay, fine, you can shoot one guy in the butt, then go.

One guy in the butt each. [chortles]

Fine.

Okay, then.

Seconds for everybody.

Mom, can Beavis and Butt-Head go play the video game,

like, right now?

Of course you can.

But before we have screen time,

what do we have?

Family time.

Does anyone see an edge piece with a little bit of cloud?

This sucks. [snickers]

[tranquil chime music]

♪ ♪

Uh... hmm.

[snickers] - [snickers]

Yeah. [laughs]

♪ ♪

Huh.

This is the worst song I've ever heard in my life.

[guffawing]

Is it a song, though?

I don't think it's a song, Butt-Head.

Yeah, it is.

It's got, like, notes

and music or something.

Yeah, yeah, definitely not a song.

I think it's just, like, sounds

that are supposed to, like, calm you down, you know?

[snickers]

Damn it, Beavis, just sounds can't calm you down.

You need a song to calm you down.

No, you don't!

It's calming me down, and it's not a song.

What's your problem?

My problem is,

I'm sick of sitting next to you

being wrong all the time about everything.

Yeah, well, I'm sick of you

telling me I'm wrong all the time, yeah.

I've had enough of your crap,

so shut up.

Beavis, I will beat the living crap out of you

if you ever talk to me like that again.

Oh, yeah, yeah?

Well, let me say it again, Butt-Head.

You're wrong, and I'm tired of you giving me crap

all the time!

You wanna do something about it?

Uh, yeah.

I'm gonna do this about it.

Agh! Damn it!

[grunts] [blows landing]

Shove it up your ass, you--

[groans] [glass shatters]

- [grunts] - I've been waiting

a long time for this, Beavis.

Oh, no, you don't! No, you don't!

Your mom is a--[groans]

- [grunts] - [groans]

Shut up, Butt-Head. [blow lands]

Say one more thing about my mom!

[fighting sounds continue]

You don't like that, do you, huh?

[grunts]

Beavis, I'm gonna kill you.

- Yah! - [groans]

[blows land] [groans]

[groans] Don't even try that--ugh!

Oh, no, you don't, no, you don't!

- [groans] - Gah!

[mutters]

♪ ♪

Ugh. [groans]

Oh, what's that?

Uh... [groaning]

Uh, where are we? What happened?

[snickers]

What's that? - Uh...

I don't know, but this song sucks.

[chortles weakly]

Yeah, um...

I don't think that's a song, Butt-Head.

Yeah, definitely not a song.

[sighs]

Damn it, Beavis.

Oh, this is definitely the side of the barn.

Can Beavis and Butt-Head just play the video game

for five minutes so they can leave?

Cody, you know that this time is important

for us to connect as a family.

Sometimes, honey, we feel

like we're just not connecting with you like we should.

And that's why it's important for us to spend time

with you and your friends,

who I know are very important to you.

This piece looks like it has a schlong.

- [snickering] - [snickering]

- [laughs] - [laughs]

Cody, you didn't tell us your friend was a comedian.

Uh, a what?

"Schlong" is age-appropriate language.

Very natural for teenagers to be testing limits.

Look, Beavis, your piece fits right in here.

Yeah, whoa! [snickers]

Boing-oing-oing-oing- oing-oing-oing.

See, Cody never tells us

the cool teen lingo like "boing."

We have to learn it from his friends.

Boing. - Yeah, that there's

a real nice boing.

- Mom. - Boing-oing-oing.

Boing-yoing-yoing.

[both laugh]

That new teen slang is terrific.

Whoa. Your mom's got wood.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, your dad, too, yeah.

Yeah, they're probably gonna score.

Yeah. [snickers]

Mom, Dad, seriously.

They have to g-- - You know what?

We're all having such a good time.

Why don't you two spend the night?

That's a great idea.

Oh, it's just so much fun that Cody has friends now.

- Mom... - Wait, what's happening?

We can finish the puzzle and then play Risk.

Or Settlers of Catan.

And then hot cocoa and go to bed.

Uh, no.

We wanna play the video game.

Yeah, yeah, we wanna shoot guys in the butt.

Yeah. [snickers]

You can play all day tomorrow.

Don't worry.

Cody's got some PJs he's grown out of.

Uh... this sucks.

- Yeah, really. - I know.

Uh, well, this sucks.

[snickers] - Oh, God.

Now, I know you guys were planning

on playing video games all day...

Yeah, we're gonna shoot a guy in the butt.

But after breakfast, let's all go down to the park

and enjoy this sunny weather.

What?

We just wanna give Cody some quality time

with his new friends.

Just leave, please.

Sorry, Cody.

We don't like this any more than you do,

but we cannot leave until we play your video game.

That's true, yeah, yeah.

I'm gonna shoot a guy in the butt.

Yeah. [snickers]

Usually, for breakfast, we have unsweetened granola,

but since it's a special occasion--

Cody made some friends--

we're having Cody's special breakfast.

He's so creative, he came up with this himself.

It's Cocoa Puffs, Count Chocula, and Sugar Smacks

with a scoop of ice cream on top.

It is a whole lot of sugar, but what the heck?

It's not every day that Cody makes friends.

Whoa. [laughs]

[gibbering]

This is gonna be cool.

[gibbering]

[ceramics breaking] Hey!

Philip, can I talk to you for a second?

[crashing noises] - [snickering]

- I hate to say this... - I know.

But Cody's so shy.

It's good for him to be friends with someone so expressive

and theatrical, like Beavis.

Exactly.

It could really bring him out of his shell.

He's an only child, and it's just good for him

to be around an extrovert, you know?

Oh, maybe he'll join theater club.

[gibbering]

Exactly. Beavis is a good influence.

I am Cornholio!

I need TP for my bunghole. [snickering]

- Cody needs this. - [gibbering]

Mom, Dad, you gotta do something.

We know, sweetie.

We know what we have to do.

We need to start listening to you better

and respect your choice of friends.

- What? - Ooh!

[gibbering]

- Hey, Beavis? - Ah!

I just want you to know, we hear you.

I'm Cornholio too.

And we're always here if you and your friends

want to rap about TP and bungholes

or substance abuse or just whatever.

Are you threatening me?

Not at all, man.

Boing. - Boing-oing-oing.

Broccolini! [chortling]

I have broccolini in my bunghole.

[gibbering]

[snickering]

I'm gonna go ahead and borrow this.

See you later.

You will give me all your broccolini!

Are your friends leaving?

Well, their parents probably want them home

on Saturday morning.

I can't wait to meet them.

I bet they're really bunghole.

I need broccolini for my bunghole.

Broccolini!

I knew he liked that broccolini.

[gibbering]

You will not disrespect my bunghole!

[rock music]

[bluesy rock music]

♪ ♪

[chiming noises]

Chirp.