Original subtitles

Marine Command Post, Inspector Chang Choy calling.

Beach Order is in place. Over.

Son of a bitch!

Oh shoot.

With June 30th only 72 hours away, Hong Kong is poised

for one of the most historic moments of the closing century.

The return of Hong Kong to Chinese rule after a

century and a half as a British colony.

With both Prince Charles and President Jiang Zemin at the podium,

and high-ranking guests from a all over the world in attendance,

there will be an unprecedented level of security for Tuesday's ceremonies.

Three security zones for land, sea and air will be patrolled...

♪ I confess that this is really not my song ♪

♪ I bought it in Hong Kong ♪

- A belly ring. Does that increase pleasure during sex? - Not really.

I meant for me. Lance, work with me.

- I'm working. Sorry, sir. - I'm not loving this.

Lance, burn this in front of your parents. Will you do that?

- We can't wear underwear with these clothes. - Why not?

This underwear sucks. I'm not gonna wear it.

- Why not? - They're denim.

- The underwear are spandex nylon. - So.

They're chemically reactive.

So then, then don't wear the underwear! I've always been against underwear.

My record proves that.

Come on, people! Work with me! You're models! Look bitchy!

Look like you haven't eaten in a week.

♪ Don't fake it V-Six Jeans ♪

♪ Don't fake it I'm good enough to wear ♪

- I need your support today. - Yes, sir.

- It's a very hard day for me. - Why can't you be a gentleman like your partner?

My partner! Where is Ray?

- Give me the phone! I need your support. - Yes, sir.

- Does that mean anything to you? - Yes, sir.

- I gotta get out of the garment business. - Yes, sir.

- Hey, nice wheels, man. - Take it for a spin.

- Are you sure? - A short spin.

- Hey, guys! - Yeah!

- Yo, Bobo! - Marcus. Hey, nice glasses.

- Cartier? - Yeah. You want them?

I've got boxes. Greatest knock-off artist in Hong Kong.

- Ah, hard to believe Marcus Ray gone "regit." - Legit, legit.

- Yeah. - Oh, ho, ho, ho. Any good? The last ones.

Work good. 15, 20 minutes. Long enough to make sale.

Good. I wanna go out with my reputation intact. I always made quality crap.

You know, Ray, you can always come back.

Hey, Choy. You've got to use designers who speak English.

What's wrong? These excellent.

Right out of picture in catalog.

I know, but Puma, one "M." Only an idiot would buy these.

One "M," two "M's." These are hot. Collector item.

This is not your shipment, Marcus.

Get your gweilo hands off the merchandise, or you'll lose it.

You're in the toy business now, Skinny?

I thought you were too big for that.

I can be in any business I want, and no one can touch me.

Not you, not the law.

You wanna know why your legs didn't just get broken?

I put a big bet on you in today's race.

Ladies and gentlemen,

your attention, please.

The Hong Kong Merchants' Association

will begin its seventh annual charity race in ten minutes.

V-Six Jeans is our name.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Give me some energy, huh?

Come on! Give me the illusion that you give a crap.

- Come on, people! Pachy. Pachy! - No, really.

- Are you okay? Can I get you some water? - Uh-uh.

- You work for me, right? You're an elephant? - Right.

Then put your head on and get to work! I'm not paying you peanuts!

Get going! Get on it!

Marcus, Marcus, he's our man.

If he can't do it, no one can!

Hey, girls.

I'm late, I'm late.

Where were you? At 8:00, we had a tax meeting.

At 10:30, we had a fashion show. At 11:15, we had a design meeting.

At noon, the copier blew up.

At 1:00 p.m., we had an office meeting, Ray,

with the entire staff of V-Six Jeans saying, "Where's Ray? Where's Ray?"

Good job. Hey, did you get my running shoes?

I got something even better.

You're gonna love this. It's Puma, 5000-X, hydroplane sole, shock absorbent.

Trust me, it's the bomby-bomb. It's the shit.

It is shit.

You're kidding right?

It doesn't matter what you wear because I'm gonna win.

Eddie. Hey. Chrome Dome.

Just back from Tokyo, huh? You son of a bitch.

I'm one step ahead of an angry husband. Hah!

- Hey, Tommy. - Hey Eddie, nice clothes. Steal 'em?

He doesn't mean it. Hey, I thought you'd given up.

I heard you were running. I can't let you spoil my record.

Anyway, get ready to weep.

I'm gonna kick your ass again, like last year.

Hey, you won last year because you cheated.

No, because since you hooked up with Tommy, you've gotten soft.

Soft? I'll show you soft.

Who's next?

We've got Sharks, We've got K3, We've got Kandoo,

I've got a 100,000 on Eddie Wang. We've got a 100,000 on V-Six Jeans.

Any takers?

Bang-bang!

Hey, he's betting on both of us again.

He's a two-timer.

See you at the finish line.

Okay, all right, all right.

Here, here. Here, take it. Take it. Take it all.

If you keep hanging out with them, we're not gonna be worth crap.

All we have is our reputation, Ray!

- He's family. - Oh, he's family. Yeah, the five families.

His brother is the biggest mobster in Hong Kong.

He's not his brother, that's his cousin.

- Just stop being an old lady. - No! You ruined it. I don't want to anymore.

Hey, no.

You worry too much. Look, I'm in condition.

- I don't. - We'll go on Eastern Avenue, then come back on Second.

- I don't want to! - It's a straight shot to the finish line.

We are a lock to win, my buddy.

- Eddie's got the fix in. - Okay?

Okay, no problem.

Bite me.

On your marks!

Get set!

Go!

Go! Go!

Go, go! Now go!

Whoo!

Shit.

We're a lock to win!

I'm not worried about winning.

I wanna be a lock not to die.

You're not gonna die, okay?

Turn it around.

The cars.

Go, go, go. Go.

- You're in shape. You're in shape. - I'm in shape.

- Go, go. - I'm in shape.

- He's taking a shortcut. Turn here! Turn here. - Here?

- There's no "here" here. - Trust me. Turn here.

- Turn! - Okay.

What are you waiting for, you idiot?

Go.

Go, go, go!

- It's all you, baby. - Sorry.

Sorry. Excuse me.

Go, go! Don't even think about it.

- Sorry. - Go, go, go.

You got it! You got it.

We're winning. We're winning.

Come on! Move that big beautiful ass of yours.

Hey, what you doing?

I'm just... I'm just saying we're winning, that's all.

Hey!

Move it!

You gotta want it!

Finish line. Super fast.

Yah-ha-ha, baby! Yah-ha-ha!

- Hey, how the hell did he get ahead of us? - Good question.

Those Pumas must be knock-offs.

What kind of scumbag would sell knock-offs?

God damn traitor.

Eddie.

Something's not right.

- It's not him. - So what?

Eddie.

- Uh, Ray. Not a good idea, Ray! - Stop it!

Hey, what are you doing?

- They've got Eddie. - You've got me.

Drop it.

Eddie! Eddie.

He was cheating again.

Thank goodness.

Get up.

You're gonna talk, perp.

No, he's not.

Move, move, move.

Police! Don't move.

Now stand up slowly.

No sudden moves.

I got her. I got her.

Tommy.

What did you do? She's a cop.

She's a cop?

Yeah, she's a cop.

You didn't tell me she was a cop.

You say you were innocent participants in this rickshaw race?

For which I see no permit was issued.

However, a number of questions remain.

What kind of questions? All we did was defend ourselves.

We're innocent.

- We're not... We're not criminals. - That remains to be seen.

We've identified this man, Ivan Largoff.

Killed at the scene by Detective Ling.

He's formerly a KGB agent, Russian Intelligence.

And since you're so innocent, why would such a person attack you?

Maybe he wasn't that intelligent.

Look, we're legitimate businessmen with an office to run.

An office that employs a lot of Hong Kong citizens.

And pays those Hong Kong taxes.

Pay for the police, and that's why Hong Kong police are everywhere.

Mr. Ray, our records indicate...

That you first entered Hong Kong as an illegal immigrant.

At one point, you were deported and came back immediately

because of the money you could make, and proceeded to build a large illegal business.

Hey, hey, hey. We all make mistakes, huh?

Apparently.

Did you know the racer who was killed by the Russians

was a small-time gambler and worked for your friend Eddie Wang?

Eddie Wang?

Doesn't ring a bell to me.

I suppose you don't know him either, Mr. Hendricks.

No bells here,

but I do have a little ringing in my ears from the accident, though.

Sir, their stress levels are up.

- They're lying. - What a surprise.

Your self-defense story checks out, for now, that is.

You're released on your own recognizance. Don't leave the jurisdiction, gentlemen.

This investigation isn't over.

And... we know where you live.

Speaking personally, once we fold that Union Jack,

I don't care what they do with you.

Mr. Hendricks, Mr. Ray, you may go.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

Hey, we're a lock to win. You don't weigh much.

- Good call. Good job. - It's shit.

- Oh. No. - Uh-uh, wait a minute. Sit down.

I have a few more questions.

Besides trashing your company's reputation,

you mind telling me what you're doing here?

I'm sorry. Who are you?

Are you, like, the Hong Kong Five-O?

Is there a parking ticket We need to take care of'?

Karen Lee. Executive V.P. International Sales, V-Six Jeans.

Oh.

I realize this may be very difficult for you, gentlemen,

but please try to think.

- What are those? - Um, V-Six, 606, size eight.

- Your size. - I'm a six, thank you.

Ah.

Mr. Hendricks, the masseuse is here for your regular appointment.

Yeah, uh, cancel her for the rest of the week.

Make it the rest of the month.

Obviously neither one of you is used to pulling your own weight in this company.

But please, let's give it a try. Pull.

- I meant together. - Oh. Oh.

Pull.

That's enough.

Now try these.

Gentlemen, in light of our company motto and mascot, how do you explain this?

Uh, well, I've been working out, and you, uh, naturally...

- Okay, they're knock-offs. - Exactly.

Cheap eight-ounce denim instead of the 14-ounce used in authentic V-Six Jeans.

What? There are knock-off artists in Hong Kong?

I'm shocked. Okay, you see, Hong Kong is kinda like knock-off central.

They knock off everything from Benetton to Fila to knock-off Puma.

Yeah, and the Pope's Catholic. So what?

This pair came from the last shipment you sent to the States.

In fact, half the entire shipment was counterfeit.

- No, no, no, that's impossible. - That's fact.

Inspector's report. Check it against your own shipping manifest.

She's right.

She looks good when she's right, huh? Mm-hmm.

And if half the entire shipment was eight-ounce instead of 14,

at wholesale, that means V-Six Jeans is out $4,200,000.

Oh, that's bullshit. Aha.

You didn't convert from Hong Kong dollars to U.S. dollars.

The real figure is $5,400,000.

- Uh, this calculator has... - Excuse us, please.

Bangkok won't ship the yardage in 30 days because of the handover.

Okay.

Swap the destination with the origin in the computer.

When it gets here, tell Customs we made a mistake.

- Then return it to our factory here, okay? - Yes, sir.

Uh, Mel, don't you have something for me to sign?

I sign things too, in private.

Oh, things like that falsified document.

Uh, no, no, no, no, no. Ray signs all the false documents.

Oh, I agree, and I think you two have spent your time in Hong Kong

getting drunk, chasing ass and getting massages

instead of taking care of company business.

Look, the massage industry in Hong Kong is going through a really tough time right now.

I'm just trying to help out the local college girls.

I don't know and I don't care whether you two pathetic excuses for business partners

are mixed up in this knock off bullshit as instigators or just dupes.

I swear, we're just dupes.

Either way, we'll see tonight.

That's when the Customs Police is raiding the factory these bogus jeans came from.

They'll need you to identify the merchandise.

Some local named Eddie Wang signed the lease.

Eddie Wang?

Doesn't sound familiar. Ray?

I'll pick you up at 6:30 tonight.

No, wait a minute.

Ray got his ass kicked last night.

Ray hasn't slept in 24 hours.

Ray can't go on some wild goose chase.

Don't worry. If Ray's mixed up in this knock-off bullshit,

Ray's gonna get plenty of rest in prison, and so will you.

- Prison? - Yes, prison, gentlemen.

You see, counterfeiting happens to be a federal crime.

Whether it's clothing or whether it's money, it doesn't matter.

Now if you're not available tonight, I can only assume

that you intend to flee my jurisdiction.

In which case, trust and believe, I will take appropriate action.

Like I said, 6:30. Be there.

She looks good when she's mean, hmm?

Champagne?

Where's Eddie, big guy?

Where's your boss, huh?

Light you a cigar?

Of course not, you're dead.

Idiot Comrade Volkov killed you.

We've had enough of your screw ups, Volkov.

You're always high on something.

Now we give you tough love.

Cure you, cold turkey.

Ah, Trevyev, your passports are ready.

Didn't your mothers teach you not to make a mess?

You've turned this place into a shit hole.

You want transportation out of Hong Kong?

- And you want to get paid? - Ooh.

Our V-Six friends are headed toward the factory.

I'd suggest you cowboys get over there before they do and clean up.

You're worried about Miss V-Six, size six.

I'm worried about those guys at the market chasing Eddie.

- Why? - Why?

Ah, okay. Because he's a scumbag and

he's probably got himself mixed up in some Chinese "ting."

You mean "tong." "Ting" is a beverage.

- I thought it was "Tang." - That's another beverage.

And by the Way, Eddie's is no scumbag, okay. He's my family.

"Eddie's no scumbag. He's family."

Hey, easy on my shirt, big fella.

That's a thousand-dollar Hawaiian.

Oh, that's now... Jesus!

Oh, my... Goddamn it! You did that on purpose!

- Look, I'm a scumbag, uh? - I never said you were a scumbag.

Oh, you thought about it.

Ff lend.

Oh, great. Now he's a mind reader. Stupid asshole.

I should kill him in front of his parents.

Thanks.

Chief's upset with you about this. You made a spectacle of yourself.

You know what he's like. He wanted to keep a low profile.

Thanks.

Tommy?

- Stay out of it! - Stay out of what?

Get your ass back in there, or you're in big trouble.

I am already.

Hey, hold on.

You're supposed to report to us, but we never hear from you.

I'm busy. You don't want me to tip off Ray, do you?

You've got years of training.

You can't handle a street punk like Marcus Ray?

It's a local named Eddie Wang.

He's running a knock-off factory.

He obviously made the wrong kind of enemies, and I got caught in the middle.

Look, I gotta get back down there.

Well, Eddie Wang, we may have to send him away.

That's something we can arrange.

Jesus.

You think I can't smell cops?

It all fits now!

You make me a partner...

While the executives from the States looking for knock-offs.

You're setting me up!

It's not what it looks like, Ray!

You're using me to get to Eddie. Huh?

Help, help.

Who are you working for? Tell me!

What are you doing?

What?

What are you doing?

Who the hell are you?

If they go over, I'm the last man you're gonna see on planet Earth.

Harry!

Game's over, Harry! We gotta tell him!

Tell him.

We work for the government! We're CIA!

Harry's my boss!

Now pull us up, Ray.

Pull us up, Ray.

You look confused, Mr. Ray. It's simple really.

Because my boy Hendricks here needed a cover, so we really had to use you.

You were a little dirty, but we couldn't be picky. Understand?

You understand what I'm saying?

Don't you understand what you do affects me?

You want to destroy our business?

Is that what you want, huh?

Whoever you are, you were supposed to make me legit.

You lied to me!

It was a need-to-know basis, and you didn't need to know!

There is not one legitimate businessman

in all of Hong Kong that would work with you!

Not one, Ray. I did.

I've been carrying you for four years.

You're the king of knock-offs.

I was, but you're still a fake.

Now that is a problem. That is a problem.

Why?

There's this woman executive from V-Six Jeans.

She's from the States.

Somebody's counterfeiting our jeans, and she thinks we're involved.

- We're supposed to raid a factory tonight. - What?

Shit! What the hell is the matter with you, asshole?

You're in trouble.

Nice building.

- Thank you. - Too nice on your salaries.

- What? - Check into "Sublet, Manager's Residences," if convicted.

No, no, it's just the lobby that's nice. I mean the rooms are very small.

- Let me help... - Help you.

Thank you.

May I?

Here's the lease on the factory we're raiding.

Eddie Wang signed it.

That still doesn't prove he's a knock-off artist.

Why are you defending a gangster?

It looks like he's screwing us.

Oh, no. With Eddie, it's more like date rape.

Would you explain to my partner, there are three people on this bench,

not just his biceps.

Hey, look, I hear you like 007.

Just the ones with Sean Connery.

- I hope we find something. - We will.

Last week, we busted a whole warehouse, where they were making knock-off Apple Babies.

Apple Babies?

- Oh, I love those. - Me too.

I buy them for my niece, Ashley, all the time.

You know, it's really starting to become a full-time job.

Really?

This is Vanilla Creme.

- She's the hardest to find. - She's yours.

I gotta tell you, though, she's a phony.

It seems like they're everywhere.

Sir, everything is prepared.

Good. The men are in position.

Once it's secured, get the V-Six people inside to identify the merchandise.

Yes sir.

Marcus Ray...

Parents were doctors, died in lndo-China.

Adopted age ten, and a series of meaningless jobs until you hooked up with Tommy.

That's supposed to be me?

I'm sorry.

Don't be sorry.

I'm sorry that after tonight Eddie will probably be arrested.

What are we waiting on?

Every night at the same time they get a food delivery.

When the door opens, we go in.

Szechuan or Cantonese?

It's Mama's Pizza.

- Hello, who's there? - It's Mom's Pizza.

Come on, let's go!

Don't let him go!

Ah!

Freaking hell!

Go on.

- Nice toy. - It's not a toy, so don't play with it.

Here's your wallet.

And... I accept your apology.

No, no, no. I'm not saying I'm sorry.

Okay, okay. The apology's over.

Happy?

Happy. I'm sorry.

Me, too.

Let's go see your boss, Tommy.

These guys have something against escalators?

What's with the sign?

We're entering the Buddha.

Wait, what's the cover charge?

- We're gonna have to search him. - It's all right.

- I cleared it with the boss. - I know, we still have to search him.

- I said, I've cleared it. - Step back.

Sorry, man.

You want to tell me what it is you want?

It's okay.

A trade. I'll bring you Eddie Wang

if you'll take him out of Hong Kong.

What are you? A comedian? You think Eddie Wang is worth all of that?

- All right. - You got to show me some more.

It's okay.

It's the Green Flame project, 1989.

The Soviets were years from completing it. They must have finished it.

You see that battery your friend is carrying around out there.

That's not a battery.

It's a state of the art explosive device equal to half of a stick of dynamite.

If he knew it was a nano-bomb, he wouldn't be carrying it around like a cough drop.

Once they've achieved that level of miniaturization, Harry

they could target anywhere they want.

They're already there.

They have a remote control detonation device, probably a microwave.

And they're gonna put these bombs into clock radios, stereos, microwaves,

cell phones, even children's toys.

And once this stuff gets shipped,

there's a lot of innocent people gonna be in lot of great danger.

What about Eddie?

- What do you want me to do about Eddie? - Bring Eddie in.

You tell him I'll protect him. He might know something.

- Thanks, man. - So you're a spy, huh?

I was an intelligence analyst.

Anything I heard of?

- You've heard of the Gulf War? - Wait, wait, wait. From Eddie.

What the hell is that?

It's a message from Eddie.

I know where he is.

Where the hell are we?

It's a fruit market.

Johanson would love this place.

I hope he keeps his word.

Shouldn't we be leaving a trail of breadcrumbs or something?

So you still care?

My mother always loved that record.

You're listening to the grama for some reason, huh?

I found the record in Papa's things. You can take it.

We raided a factory last night, Eddie.

Why?

You were knocking off our jeans.

Come on, Ray, you're more than adopted, you're family.

Be a buddy.

And Tommy's my bud. Right, Tommy?

Buddies like to play. Right?

They're just the tip of the iceberg. Do you know what you did?

Who set you up, huh? Tell me!

Look, you won't like it. It was Skinny.

When he brought these Russians to me, it seemed like a sweet...

- Skinny? - Yes!

I provide them with knock-off toys, toasters, whatever.

They do some modifications, I ship them.

This is obviously between you two. So if you can aim at him...

When I found out what they really were

I shipped them right to the bottom of the sea.

They were name-bombs.

You know?

Tommy's CIA.

The little dweeb is CIA? Good cover. Good.

I don't know how much longer, if Ray keeps telling everyone.

Right, Ray?

Eddie, I made a deal for you.

They're going to help you go somewhere safe. I promise you.

That's what Skinny told me, that he'd help. But I'm gonna help myself.

I've something for you, in the safe.

Oh, hold on. This is the biggest thing to hit Hong Kong since Typhoon Hattie.

- Better than money. - Watch him. Come on.

I was going to sell it to the highest bidder,

French, Germans or Beijing.

But family is family.

Eddie!

Damn it.

Ray!

We've got to run.

Don't you know the way out?

- No idea. - Great!

Don't they have bananas here?

Ahhh! God, I hate this fruit!

Shit!

Whoa!

It's me. A VCR?

Surveillance tape. Anyone who's been in and out of here is on it.

Move!

Stop playing around. Come on.

Let's go.

I'm going to find a place around here to collapse.

Great. Wait for me in the office.

All right.

- Let's get rid of this shit. We're running out of time. - Okay.

Hey, Skinny!

You better run, Skinny. They're coming after you.

Gweilo, you're a dead man. You killed Eddie.

The Russians did it. The people you got Eddie involved with.

You're a lousy liar, Marcus! I didn't get Eddie involved with any Russians.

Then who was he hiding from?

Who knows? You were with him when he was executed.

Executed.

Executed.

Why... Why did you say "executed"?

You're gonna tell me everything.

Cut it out, Ray.

Stop, Ray. Stop.

You're not really gonna do this!

Uh yeah!

You bet on both sides, right, Skinny?

- You bastard. - Tell me.

That was a Hong Kong love song.

And we hope it put President Jiang Zemin and Prince Charles in a cuddly mood

for tonight's handover ceremony.

We'll have the news in five, with an update on the explosion

at the fruit market this morning.

But this is another romantic song.

This time from the US...

What happened to you?

Some explosion.

- At the fruit market? The one on the news? - Yeah. Easy, easy.

Look at you. You're bleeding. We got to get you to a hospital.

Ahhh, no hospitals. No.

We have to get you to a hospital. Look at this, there's blood... Aww! Shit!

- We need to get cleaned up. - Yeah.

You know sometimes you're in such shock, you don't realize that you've been hurt.

- So... - Ah! Easy, easy, easy.

What were you doing in a place like that anyway?

You know Ray has some contacts.

What kind of contacts?

A friend, a buddy.

He blew up. You know shit happens.

- Ah! - Easy.

- Oh! - Got it?

Eddie knew about the bombs, huh! That's why you killed him, huh!

I don't know what you're talking about. Eddie was like a brother to me.

Yeah. Lucky man, this brother.

If I'm right, this tape will prove you booby-trapped Eddie's safe.

Piece of shit! You killed him.

Hey, don't go anywhere. Okay. We're gonna have a movie night and make some popcorn.

Watch this, you sit, be comfortable. We'll be back.

Hold on. Let me find it.

Wait a minute. Stop it there.

- Son of a bitch! - Who is that?

Karen, the V-Six exec. I don't believe this!

Hendricks is in danger, you gotta go after him. He's walking right into a trap.

I'll talk to Skinny.

Knockoffs, Jesus!

You and Marcus have been acting really strange lately.

You sure you told me everything?

We were trying to decide what to have...

- for dinner. - Mmm-hmm.

I said, "How about Szechuan?"

And... Let the machine get that...

And he said, "How about Cantonese?" We already had Cantonese.

- Mmm-hmm. - Yeah.

Well, I was trying to decide what Hawaiian shirt to wear...

Oh, I like this. I'm into this!

Back when you got that fake identity from the CIA...

We're gonna play a little game, Hendricks. It's called called 20 Questions.

Question number one.

If that's even you're real name, are you working alone, or are there more of you?

Hey!

Tommy... She saw Eddie before we did.

She's a bigger knock-off than us.

Watch your step, Ray!

- Are you sure? - She was on the tape.

I was never into threesomes!

I've got her!

What do we do with her?

We take her to see the chief right now.

- Johanson is dead. - What?!

The Russians killed him. And Skinny, too.

You'd better talk right now, bitch, or I'll blow your goddamn head off! Talk.

- Right now! - Look into my pants.

Go ahead, come on, you were pretty eager five minutes ago, you little shit.

Just do it.

In the back.

CIA?

Bullshit.

It's a fake, Tommy.

- Just like her. - No, it's real. Check it.

It's good.

I'm sorry for what I said in the other room.

But those handcuffs were really biting into my wrists, you know.

I should have blown your head off and set you up.

- Yeah! - Why the jeans act?

Langley suspected there was a mole in Hendricks' division.

I'm here to find out who it is.

I have an emergency contact. But there's no way I can trust him.

No! There's a special security unit attached with the American VIP's here

for handover. I think they can help us.

The American delegation is led by Vice-President Al Gore,

who is a champion of trade with Hong Kong.

Vice-President Gore is also expected to meet with the commercial attaches...

You can't go like that. You got to change.

Formal or casual?

Let's go.

I'll bring the van. I'll bring the van around.

Holy fucking shit! The pockets of our jeans.

This is knock-off. This is knock-off.

Boom!

Meanwhile, at Government House, another historic moment.

With the last British governor, Christ Patton, in attendance.

The British flag has been lowered for the last time.

After Eddie dumped the knock-offs in the sea,

the Russians switched to our jeans.

Oh! So they're into fashion now. And your business is booming.

You know where you're going?

The computer says they're shipping the jeans tonight.

- You're never gonna get away with this. - Shut up!

They're already getting away with it.

I know. I'm trying to mind-fuck them.

And the placement test at Langley

I was off the chart in verbal skills.

Could I die alone, please?

Lucky for some, it's the handover tonight.

- There's only way out of Hong Kong by sea. - Oh yeah.

If we hurry up we can intercept them.

And by the way, do you know how to swim?

Electronics are amazing, huh? Three months old, already obsolete.

The best part of microchips to get mega-bucks.

Small as a cell phone.

With this little kukla, you can do the job. Boom!

We already told everybody. The FBI, the Mossad...

- Shut up! - Surete, Barnaby Jones...

Now you'll eat these. Turn green in a flash. Better than a diet pill.

Two of these, you'll lose your appetite completely.

In fact, you'll lose you completely.

Or maybe you will drink this?

You wanna drink this, baby?

Let's talk about this. I wanna talk, I got some information.

- No, you don't wanna do that. - You like it?

You want more? I'll give you more.

I open your mouth. I open it wide open this time.

Way to go away, Harry! Nice shot!

Hey! Even left a few alive to interrogate. Now come on, untie me!

Harry! Come on, man.

Congratulations.

You're giving the cigar to the wrong guy, Harry.

You didn't keep them alive for interrogation. You just eliminated a partner

you didn't need anymore.

Just like you did with Skinny.

Washington thought it might be someone in our organization, but never you, Johanson.

After twenty years, why?

Entrepreneurship, baby cakes.

Once We have our little baby bombs all over the U.S.,

there's gonna be a monthly satellite bill that would make HBO green with envy.

A hundred million dollars a month.

And if they don't pay, we send a detonation signal,

and "Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road!"

"Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road"? You'd better buy some new CD's, Harry. It's pathetic!

Mmm-hmm!

Ahh.

Shoot 'em.

What the hell was that? Go find out!

Toss it!

Yes!

Sir, our mobile unit has picked up a signal. There's an unauthorized intrusion.

Sir!

- Any change? - No, ma'am. Still incoming.

Footprint of cargo vessel, sir. No friend or foe beacon.

She already passed the first line of buoys.

There goes the second.

The next line is the deadline. And that's exactly what it means.

Attention, all air units.

Attention, all air units.

This is Guardian. Proceed to shipping warning line,

and intercept approaching vessel.

- Use whatever force is necessary. - Roger.

Ahhh!

Ahhh!

Attention, cargo vessel. Attention, cargo vessel.

Bouncer! Report in! What's going on?

Guardian, we have visual. The vessel is under power, seems to be drifting.

Approaching final deadline. ETA, one minute.

Bouncer, that vessel must not, repeat, must not cross the deadline.

If it does, execute with extreme prejudice. Do you copy?

We copy, Guardian. Extreme prejudice, over.

You heard him, boys. Activate and arm weapon systems.

Weapon systems are active. Activating now!

Attention, cargo vessel! Attention, cargo vessel!

This is a restricted area. If you don't change course, we will fire on you.

Do you read? Cargo vessel, do you read?

Attention, cargo vessel. This is a restricted area...

If you don't change course, we will fire on you.

Attention barge 28. You will be over the deadline in ten seconds.

You must change course, or we will open fire.

- Locked on target. - Fire on my command.

Steady!

- Steady. Five... - Come on!

Four...

Three...

- Two... - Guardian, she's stopping.

The vessel has stopped. Six meters from the deadline.

It appears to be turning back.

Sir, weapons are still hot.

Deactivate weapon system.

Please confirm, deactivate weapon system.

- Orders confirmed. - Return to base and wait for further orders.

- Roger, Wing Commander, returning to base. - Phew! That was a close one.

Come on!

Come on, come on.

Move your asses up to the tower! Hear me? Go!

Damn it.

We are under heavy fire. We should move now, sir.

See if it's clear.

Move!

Ohhh!

Oh, shit.

It's gonna blow! Come on, it's gonna blow!

Come on. Let's go, start the engine! Hurry up!

- We're all gonna die. - I'm doing my best.

I got it. I got it!

Come on! Come on!

Over here!

Are you okay?

- You all right? - Yeah!

- What happened? - I smoked his fat ass like a Roman candle.

Look! This is his detonator.

What are you looking for?

Johanson.

Victoria Harbor lights up with the first fireworks starting

just a few hours before the official handover,

kicking off a two-day fireworks extravaganza,

where over $100 million will literally go up in smoke.

The use of fireworks, traditionally a symbol of celebration,

seems particularly meaningful in these two nights,

when the world watches as Hong Kong puts on its biggest-ever fireworks,

- to welcome the Chinese... - They found explosives in our jeans?

That's not good! People don't want explosives in their jeans.

Hey! Some people do, you know.

Check this out.

Are you crazy! That's evidence.

I've been doing some research. The average American home has 3.57 remote controls.

I was thinking, what if you had one that did everything?

I'm not just talking the VCR, I'm not just talking the TV.

I'm talking Jacuzzi, sprinklers...

The police estimates that there are over one million people

on both sides of the harbor tonight...

You turn that thing and the garage opens up.

- Oh, yeah. - It opens.

Forget it.

We don't know anything about electronics.

Well, let's stick to what we know.

The following is a special report. A loud explosion was witnessed in Kowloon area

this evening shortly after the fireworks began.

Spectators noted green flames from the explosion.

The authorities will not confirm whether the explosion was part

of the fireworks show.

- Earlier this evening a similar explosion with... - What do you know?

Massage parlors? Gambling? Booze?

- Yes. - Hmm! That's not bad.

If I had lot of money, a lot of money.

- I'd start my own football league. - Yeah.

Yeah. Only women players.

- Why? - Then I'd be the only guy.

Fantastic!

No action movie would be complete without sweat.