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♪ daring duck of mystery ♪
♪ champion of right ♪
♪ swoops out of the shadows ♪
♪ darkwing of the night ♪
♪ somewhere some Villain schemes ♪
♪ but his number's up ♪
3, 2, 1!
♪ darkwing duck ♪
♪ when there's trouble You call d.W. ♪
♪ darkwing duck ♪
Let's get dangerous.
♪ darkwing duck ♪
Darkwing, darkwing duck!
♪ a cloud of smoke And he appears ♪
♪ the master of surprise ♪
♪ who's that cunning Mind behind ♪
♪ the shadowy disguise ♪
♪ nobody knows for sure ♪
♪ the bad guys are out of luck ♪
♪ here comes ♪
♪ darkwing duck ♪
Look out!
♪ when there's trouble You call d.W. ♪
♪ darkwing duck ♪
Let's get dangerous!
♪ darkwing duck ♪
♪ you better watch Out, you bad boys ♪
♪ darkwing duck ♪♪
[sirens]
[panting]
That do-gooder duck Will never find me here.
I am the terror that Flaps in the night,
A special news bulletin
That interrupts Your favorite show.
I am darkwing...
Keen gear, a real supervillain.
Let's squish him.
Gosalyn, you're supposed to Be home studying geography.
This is much more educational.
I'll deal with you later.
Right now, let's get dangerous.
Moliarty, you're cornered Like the rat you are.
Wrong rodent, duck.
A rat could never do this.
Dig straight through The planet if you want.
You'll never escape The midnight mallard.
I ditched him.
He really did dig straight Through the planet.
You're right, launchpad.
This is kung pao city.
I told you this was educational.
I'm learning about Geography already.
He's gettin' away, d.W.
Fear not, faithful sidekick.
Darkwing duck has The situation...
Well in hand.
Woopsy.
Yaahh!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa! Whoa! Gak!
Once again, The dauntless darkwing duck
Deftly defeats the demon's Devious, uh, uh...
Deviltry.
Deviltry.
Don't you know Somebody in kung pao?
My old quack fu Instructor, goose lee.
I studied with him Longer than anyone.
And you still never Earned your black belt.
D.W. Could never get One move right...
Just never mind.
We'll surprise old master lee.
He'll be impressed
That grubworm is now the Mighty masked mallard.
Grubworm? Grubworm?
A pet name.
He used it with The utmost respect.
[gosalyn] Uh-huh. Right.
O.K., so he didn't respect me.
So I only started fighting crime
To win his approval.
Anything wrong with that?
Oh, golly-gosh no, dad.
I'll make him respect me
If I have to break Every bone in my body.
I'll show master lee
That I've perfected all the Fighting techniques he taught me...
The web kick...
The dreaded nostril flip...
And, of course,
The unstoppably Savage belly bounce.
Whoa! Whoa!
Uh, lemme guess.
You couldn't get the Belly bounce right.
Correct.
I hope master lee
Won't be offended by my Dashing crimefighter's attire.
He took a vow of poverty.
Lives in a humble shack.
Wow! I wish we lived In a humble shack.
That's goose lee?
Morty, baby, Wait'll ya see my next video...
the quack fu diet... Fight fat with your feet.
Ciao, babes. Let's do dim sum.
So, grubworm, You return at last.
Um... Ahem.
I have read of your adventures.
You've turned out to be Master lee's greatest...
What's the word?
Pupil? Disciple?
Disappointment.
You have abandoned The ways of quack fu.
You use machines, gas gun, Jet plane, motorcycle.
And you have never Mastered the belly bounce.
So, I've abandoned the Ways of quack fu, huh?
What about you, Mr. Quack fu diet?
One day master lee awoke To a great revelation.
If he utilized mass Marketing strategy,
He could guide more students
Along the true path of quack fu.
Suddenly, I'm rolling in dough.
Books, video, action figures.
It was incredible.
But humble master lee
Has an even greater dream.
This, my friends,
Is that dream.
Behold, ninja land.
Millions will come and learn
The true path to enlightenment.
Do you still think
Master lee has Abandoned quack fu?
No. Did I say that?
What I really meant to say
Was please teach me.
Put me back on the true path.
Yes.
Now, stop blubbering on my robe.
It's silk.
Thank you. I won't let you down.
I must shoot an advertisement
For my latest video...
quick quack fu with Master lee's honeys.
I will film your training For the commercial.
I'm a consummate actor.
You're strolling through The park with a date
When suddenly, ninja attack.
How can you protect your Weak and helpless date?
Hi-yah! Hi-yah!
She protected her Weak and helpless date
Using the ancient Art of quack fu.
Master lee can teach these Techniques to anyone,
Even a flabby wimp like this.
Isn't this great, gos?
D.W.'s in a real tv commercial.
Golly gee, sure is exciting.
About as exciting as Watching grout mildew.
Tell dad I'm going to see
The cultural highlights Of kung pao city,
Like the video arcade.
With my training,
This poor slob
Will become a mighty ball Of martial arts fury.
He'll be able to employ moves
Like the eyelid twist...
The navel spin...
B-b-b-ba!
And the most devastating Move of all...
Not the belly bounce.
The belly bounce.
Master lee will Teach you all this
In quick quack fu with Master lee's honeys.
So order now.
Cut!
So how did I do, master lee?
Adequately, grubworm.
Now let's try it with Film in the camera.
There's gotta be a video arcade
Somewhere in this city.
I need action.
[gosalyn] Not that much action!
Uh-oh.
O.K., you pajama-wearin' yahoos,
Take your best...
Oof! Oof!
Thanks, pal.
You saved my... [gasp]
Honker?
I saved your honker?
No. You look like... Never mind.
I'm gosalyn mallard.
Thanks for rescuing me.
I'm duk ling.
And we're not out Of the woods yet.
Whoa! Whoa!
I disapprove of this machine.
The longer gosalyn Stays at a video arcade,
The sooner I go To the poorhouse.
Help! They're stealing The dragon's horn!
Help!
[man] Help!
Sounds like trouble.
Mayhem at the museum.
If this doesn't Impress master lee,
Nothing will.
Suck gas, you ninja nincompoops.
What was the first Thing I taught you?
A quack fu warrior Needs only himself?
O.K. Stand back.
You don't want ninja Splattered all over you.
Prepare to face darkwing Duck's fearsome fists of fury.
First, the beak bash. Hi-yah!
Then the toe twister.
Hi-yo!
And finally, The double web-kick.
Grubworm, use the belly bounce.
I can't do the belly bounce.
Besides, These guys are battered,
Bamboozled, and beaten.
They're completely...
Helpless.
The second thing I taught you?
Never turn your back on a ninja.
To redeem yourself, Overcome your foolishness.
Grubworm, You must undergo the quack tao.
The quack tao? The quack tao?
What's the quack tao again?
Who are these Ninja bozos anyway?
Why are they after us?
The ninjas have been Terrorizing my neighborhood,
Trying to chase everyone out.
Some big developer Wants the land.
[duk ling] What'll we do?
Um...
Ah, forget the kids.
Come on, duk ling.
These guys must be part
Of an international ring of Criminal alien ninja zombie spies.
This looks like a job For gosalyn mallard,
Crimebuster!
Fellow followers of the master,
Our work is nearly done.
We have obtained...
The sacred horn!
We'll find the ancient Dragon of kung pao
And put the horn in place,
Bringing the great dragon... To life!
Anyone who stands in our way...
Anyone who stands in our way...
Uh... Well... Uh...
Shall die.
Shall die! Shall die!
The legendary ancient Dragon of kung pao.
This stuff is for real?
We just might need A teensy bit of help
On this one.
Let's vamoose.
Uh... Girl scout cookies, anyone?
[gulp]
Duk ling, help!
Duk ling!
[gosalyn] Duk ling, You coward, come back!
That spineless chicken!
That wimp!
He oughtta change his Name to weak ling.
I'm gonna wring his...
I thought you were a wimp.
You kick down iron doors.
Why didn't you Fight those ninjas?
I did not want to hurt anyone.
If they bring that dragon back,
People will get hurt.
We gotta tell darkwing.
Darkwing who?
[master lee] Remember grubworm,
The belly bounce ensures success
In any situation.
Observe.
Hah! Boards don't hit back.
Of course, I could be wrong.
And now the quack tao!
Hey! Hey!
[master lee] Now you live or die
With nothing to save You but your belly.
[darkwing] Hey! Stop all this!
It's gonna leave a mark!
Darkwing!
Darkwing!
I'm learning the belly bounce,
To retrieve the dragon's horn.
But we've seen the horn!
[whistles]
Hold it, guys.
You've seen the horn?
All these ninjas...
Are bringing to life...
This giant dragon...
[duk ling] In the jungle.
An old wives' tale.
There's no such dragon.
I've seen it. A dragon statue in the jungle.
We must stop them.
Just to prove this is nonsense,
We will go see this dragon.
[darkwing] I may have trouble With the belly bounce,
But at sleuthing,
No one beats st. Canard's crafty caped crime-crusher!
No minute detail Escapes the trained eye
Of darkwing du...
Ow!
The dragon!
[master lee] The legend is true.
The ancient dragon exists.
What now?
Let's blow it up.
That's your solution To everything.
It works on clogged sinks.
As the proverb says,
"When monkey and squirrel Argue, lion wins."
What's that supposed to mean?
The game's over.
With the dragon,
I'll chase everyone Off that property
And start building ninja land.
You're the one scaring us Out of our neighborhood,
And I led you to the dragon. Rats!
I don't believe it.
Master lee... A common criminal.
You'll be my partner, my heir.
Whaddaya say?
I say...
Suck gas!
[coughing]
Your loss, grubworm.
Get 'em, boys!
No more mr. Nice duck!
Hi-yaaaah!
[duk ling] Sorry. I hope that didn't hurt.
My apologies.
I'm not usually like this.
Excuse me.
Way to go, duk ling!
D.W., the dragon!
I've done it!
The dragon's mine!
Nothing can stop me now!
Nothing can stop me now!
Oh, great ancient dragon,
You are mine to command.
Let me hear your fearsome roar!
Ah!
Goo goo ga ga!
Huh?
Hey, it's just a baby.
It's 2,000 years old.
Maybe for dragons that's young.
Toys!
No, you idiot! Forget them.
Take me to kung pao city. Do what I say!
Nobody panic. Darkwing duck's on the job.
O.K. Now you can panic.
Toys!
Wanna pway!
Aah! Aah!
[darkwing] Avalanche!
In here!
[dragon sniffing]
Toys?
Ha ha ha!
Toys!
Uh, everyone o.K.?
I'm o.K., d.W.,
Aside from being Doomed to death.
Where did I go wrong?
I wanted to spread Quack fu wisdom.
Don't beat yourself up.
I'll do it!
We trusted you,
And you set a giant Monster loose.
You're some pal.
No time for recriminations.
Time to dig.
[dragon gurgles]
Wanna pway!
Ah!
Toys!
Rowah skates!
Ooh!
Choo-choo!
Whoo!
Twain wide!
Choo-choo bwoken!
Toy boat!
Toy boat!
The dragon's been through here.
Amazing deduction, launchpad.
Devise a plan, grubworm.
I've waited years to say this...
Quit calling me grubworm!
I hate it!
I am darkwing duck!
[darkwing] And we'll Handle this dragon my way.
Oh, draggie-poo!
Lookie what unca Darkwing's got you.
Ice cweam!
Ice cweam!
Now!
Oops!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Darkwing duck scores Another smash success.
Faw down an' go boom!
Darkwing, my son, speak to me.
Wattle!
Yaahh!
He called me s-s-son.
Ooh, wattle! Wattle!
Ha ha ha!
D.W., The dragon took master lee.
He called me... Son!
O.K., dragon...
Let's get dangerous!
I am the terror that Flaps in the night.
I am the bubble gum that Sticks in your hair.
I am darkwing duck!
Perhaps I overdid The terror thing.
Tuh-rouble!
That was the finest belly Bounce I've ever seen.
Now I can call you A true warrior.
You better call me A doctor instead.
Well, d.W., You got your quack fu black belt,
Master lee got ninja land,
And the dragon got What he wanted...
To play all day long.
And master lee taught me About marketing strategy.
I'll produce half-hour videos...
self-defense the darkwing way.
Yeah, right, dad.
Who'd wanna sit and watch you
For half an hour?
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