All language subtitles for Mapp & Lucia Season 2, Episode 4 « Worship » (itv 1986 UK) (ENG SUB ENG).en

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: WEBVTT 00:00.970 --> 00:04.380 (pleasant melodic music) 00:55.890 --> 00:58.760 - Morning dear. Difficult to believe isn't it? 00:58.760 --> 01:00.030 - That it's a good morning, not at all, 01:00.030 --> 01:00.970 there for all to behold. 01:00.970 --> 01:03.150 - Oh you know perfectly well what I mean. 01:03.150 --> 01:05.160 Lucia as mayor of Tilling. 01:05.160 --> 01:08.290 - Why not, the race is to the swift, home of the brave, 01:08.290 --> 01:11.250 never the twain, a stitch in time, yes, sick. 01:11.250 --> 01:12.670 - There's another interesting point. 01:12.670 --> 01:13.970 - Yes, yes, we all know that. 01:13.970 --> 01:16.840 There has to be a mayoress. 01:16.840 --> 01:18.040 - How did you know? 01:18.040 --> 01:21.090 - I telephoned the clerk at the town hall. 01:21.090 --> 01:21.920 - Ah, yes. 01:23.280 --> 01:24.120 - Yes. 01:26.490 --> 01:29.240 - Yes, Georgie, Mayor of Tilling. 01:30.720 --> 01:32.390 - Lucia, bravissimo. 01:33.240 --> 01:36.120 - A momentous decision for me to make. 01:36.120 --> 01:39.680 And of course, I shall have to discuss it with you. 01:39.680 --> 01:40.520 - With me? 01:40.520 --> 01:43.720 - Well I mean, it will after all affect you 01:43.720 --> 01:45.250 to a great extent. 01:45.250 --> 01:48.530 - Do you mean I shall be something? 01:48.530 --> 01:50.790 - Not officially, dear, no. 01:50.790 --> 01:54.440 But um, think of the duties that must be met by you, 01:54.440 --> 01:56.110 the Mayor's husband. 01:56.960 --> 01:57.790 - Duties. 01:58.890 --> 02:01.300 Do you mean sort of Mayoress? 02:02.520 --> 02:06.690 - A thousand times more important than that Georgino. 02:07.790 --> 02:09.290 My right hand man. 02:10.480 --> 02:13.190 I shall need your judgment and wisdom. 02:13.190 --> 02:17.360 For example, Georgie, do you think I should go out 02:19.520 --> 02:21.970 shopping each morning as I always have? 02:21.970 --> 02:23.080 - Well I don't see why not. 02:23.080 --> 02:25.410 - Well look at it like this. 02:27.040 --> 02:27.920 (sighs) 02:27.920 --> 02:31.810 Suppose a newly appointed chancellor took exercise 02:31.810 --> 02:35.240 by trotting through Westminster streets in shorts. 02:35.240 --> 02:36.370 What would you think? 02:36.370 --> 02:38.600 - Not planning to wear shorts are you? 02:38.600 --> 02:41.150 - Certainly not, a parallel case only. 02:41.150 --> 02:42.790 I mean, there is this. 02:42.790 --> 02:47.130 It would be intolerable to my democratic principles 02:47.130 --> 02:49.520 if every time I went into the grocers to make some 02:49.520 --> 02:53.970 small purchase, the other customers should stand aside. 02:53.970 --> 02:56.290 - Well as to the Lord Chancellor wearing shorts, 02:56.290 --> 02:57.730 I think it would depend a little on what sort 02:57.730 --> 02:59.060 of knees he had. 03:00.130 --> 03:01.720 And as to the other customers standing aside, 03:01.720 --> 03:03.830 it is most unlikely. 03:03.830 --> 03:05.320 And as to the other thing, 03:05.320 --> 03:07.890 I mean if you were suddenly to stop shopping yourself, 03:07.890 --> 03:09.170 people might say that you were swanking 03:09.170 --> 03:10.210 because you were Mayor. 03:10.210 --> 03:11.230 Elizabeth would. 03:11.230 --> 03:16.050 - Georgie, Georgie give me your opinion, not hers. 03:16.050 --> 03:17.520 - But why don't you just shop on Monday, 03:17.520 --> 03:19.080 Wednesday and Friday, then. 03:19.080 --> 03:21.480 - My dear, that would be hedging. 03:21.480 --> 03:22.760 I never hedge. 03:22.760 --> 03:25.490 - A hedge may save you from falling into a ditch. 03:25.490 --> 03:26.320 - What ditch? 03:26.320 --> 03:27.960 - Any ditch. 03:27.960 --> 03:29.200 Tilling is full of ditches. 03:29.200 --> 03:31.580 - I don't care about ditches. 03:31.580 --> 03:33.000 - Well there you are. 03:33.000 --> 03:35.980 - I care about principles. 03:35.980 --> 03:37.510 The slums must be cleared away. 03:37.510 --> 03:38.760 - Oh there you go, yes, milk. 03:38.760 --> 03:40.920 - And milk, milk must be pasteurized. 03:40.920 --> 03:42.560 Strict censorship in films. 03:42.560 --> 03:46.160 And if I decide to go on shopping, I shall make a point 03:46.160 --> 03:49.490 of buying very cheap, simple provisions. 03:51.210 --> 03:53.090 Cabbages and turnips, for instance. 03:53.090 --> 03:53.920 - Oh, really. 03:53.920 --> 03:57.410 - Plain living in private, high thinking in public. 03:57.410 --> 04:01.450 And you and I Georgie will set an example of simple living. 04:01.450 --> 04:05.720 From now on, neck of mutton instead of saddle 04:05.720 --> 04:06.800 of lamb or partridge. 04:06.800 --> 04:08.850 - Neck of mutton. 04:08.850 --> 04:12.600 I refuse to sacrifice my saddle of lamb or my partridge. 04:12.600 --> 04:13.440 And I tell you this. 04:13.440 --> 04:17.170 I am not going to give up my morning shopping. 04:17.170 --> 04:18.760 Where else does one hear the news? 04:18.760 --> 04:19.640 - Oh. 04:19.640 --> 04:22.850 - And in fact, I will not set an example to anybody. 04:22.850 --> 04:23.680 So there. 04:25.040 --> 04:27.950 (exasperated sigh) 04:31.480 --> 04:34.730 - Thank you for your guidance, Georgie. 04:35.880 --> 04:39.320 - Don't bother to shut the door, will you? 04:39.320 --> 04:41.640 Cabbage and turnips. 04:41.640 --> 04:42.480 - Cheers. 04:44.960 --> 04:46.210 -[Georgie] I'm so sorry, I'm a little late. 04:46.210 --> 04:47.400 - How kind of you to come. 04:47.400 --> 04:49.450 - Oh, not at all, Mr. Wyse. 04:49.450 --> 04:51.440 - Now, come abruptly to the point. 04:51.440 --> 04:53.590 - Thank you, yes. 04:53.590 --> 04:56.170 - As you probably know, Mrs. Wyse has recently 04:56.170 --> 04:58.670 suffered a severe bereavement. 04:59.640 --> 05:02.310 - Oh, I didn't know. I am sorry. 05:03.840 --> 05:05.260 - A sudden death. 05:06.560 --> 05:07.890 - Oh I am sorry. 05:08.840 --> 05:11.500 - Her budgerigar, she sat on it. 05:14.080 --> 05:14.910 - Oh. 05:15.890 --> 05:18.810 - Did you say hard or how? 05:18.810 --> 05:20.120 - How? 05:20.120 --> 05:23.770 - It was during its daily spell of freedom, cage open. 05:23.770 --> 05:26.840 She suddenly said tweet tweet. 05:26.840 --> 05:27.680 - Mrs. Wyse? 05:27.680 --> 05:31.490 - Mrs. Wyse to the budgerigar, Blue Birdy, a male. 05:31.490 --> 05:33.840 Answer came there none. 05:33.840 --> 05:35.610 Oh it'll be alright, she said. 05:35.610 --> 05:37.780 In the piano or somewhere. 05:39.130 --> 05:43.290 Then she got up to look. She'd sat on it, flattened. 05:45.410 --> 05:46.920 - Oh dear me, how sad. 05:46.920 --> 05:49.890 - I think I've now persuaded her to buck up. 05:49.890 --> 05:53.200 Carissimus poser I said, you must buck up. 05:53.200 --> 05:56.520 You must not allow the death of a bird, however dear, 05:56.520 --> 05:59.110 to stand between you and your wish to join dear 05:59.110 --> 06:01.190 Mrs. Pillson as Mayoress. 06:04.210 --> 06:05.210 - Sat on it. 06:08.050 --> 06:11.220 - Another glass of champagne I'm sure. 06:14.890 --> 06:15.890 - Sat on it? 06:19.880 --> 06:23.280 - But then he, I think I might help myself 06:23.280 --> 06:25.090 to another sherry, what about you? 06:25.090 --> 06:27.060 - No. No, no, no, no, no. 06:27.060 --> 06:27.890 - No? 06:29.650 --> 06:33.440 Well then he went on a good deal about her MBE. 06:33.440 --> 06:37.280 It bringing a cache to the post of Mayoress, 06:37.280 --> 06:40.610 unshared by other ladies of Tilling. 06:40.610 --> 06:43.020 - Do I see Susan as Mayoress? 06:44.880 --> 06:45.710 I wonder. 06:47.210 --> 06:50.840 - Well, then he hinted that she might be useful 06:50.840 --> 06:52.280 in healing the present differences 06:52.280 --> 06:54.250 between England and Italy. 06:54.250 --> 06:56.830 - Good gracious, how ambitious. 06:57.930 --> 07:02.670 - Because of his sister being the Comtesse de Faralione. 07:02.670 --> 07:07.050 - What a frightful responsibility to have this crucial 07:07.050 --> 07:08.720 honor in one's gift. 07:13.680 --> 07:14.600 Who's next? 07:16.130 --> 07:18.550 (door slams) 07:28.270 --> 07:30.560 - Lucia beloved, it's too cruel. 07:30.560 --> 07:31.800 - What is dear? 07:31.800 --> 07:33.600 - Look at it. 07:33.600 --> 07:36.760 My design for a fresco for the town hall. 07:36.760 --> 07:38.890 The council have refused it. 07:38.890 --> 07:40.210 - Dear me. 07:40.210 --> 07:42.130 (indecipherable) 07:42.130 --> 07:44.630 Look Georgie, look. Be honest. 07:47.550 --> 07:49.720 - It's quite Botticellian. 07:49.720 --> 07:50.850 - What? 07:50.850 --> 07:52.520 Compare my Deep Pools of Venus 07:52.520 --> 07:54.890 with Botticelli's anemic flapper. 07:54.890 --> 07:57.600 - As always, Irene, so vigorous. 07:57.600 --> 07:59.650 - So I must be your Mayoress, beloved, 07:59.650 --> 08:02.610 to bring Tilling Council into the 20th century. 08:02.610 --> 08:05.490 It's up to you I know, but you wouldn't be sorry. 08:05.490 --> 08:06.570 Au reservoir. 08:08.200 --> 08:13.080 - Georgie, it seems everybody wants to be Mayoress. 08:13.080 --> 08:16.910 - There is one who has not yet shown her hand. 08:23.810 --> 08:25.560 - Good morning Major. 08:26.410 --> 08:27.770 - Well mighty kind of you to come. 08:27.770 --> 08:29.760 - Oh, not at all. 08:29.760 --> 08:33.270 - Well I took the liberty of gin and French. 08:33.270 --> 08:35.560 - Oh how very kind of you. 08:35.560 --> 08:38.250 - I didn't quite get the drift. 08:38.250 --> 08:40.440 It was your day for polishing your, what was it? 08:40.440 --> 08:41.610 - My bibelots. 08:42.600 --> 08:44.610 - Yes. Yes, of course. 08:44.610 --> 08:45.640 - Cheers. 08:45.640 --> 08:48.810 - Well, I'm glad you're all right now. 08:50.450 --> 08:53.030 Perhaps you'd like to sit down. 08:58.390 --> 09:01.440 Well now my dear old man, if I may call you so. 09:01.440 --> 09:02.690 - Oh yes, please do. 09:02.690 --> 09:05.320 - After 25 years in the King's service. 09:05.320 --> 09:07.120 Oh, God bless him. 09:07.120 --> 09:09.120 - Oh yes, God bless him. 09:14.800 --> 09:16.520 - It's best to, what? 09:16.520 --> 09:17.960 (stammers) 09:17.960 --> 09:18.800 - Please. 09:20.560 --> 09:21.570 - Best to be frank and open. 09:21.570 --> 09:23.120 - Oh yes, absolutely. 09:23.120 --> 09:24.210 - Absolutely. 09:26.560 --> 09:27.390 Now, what? 09:28.240 --> 09:30.480 - Go ahead, please. 09:30.480 --> 09:34.480 - Re the Mayoress, your lady wife, she will need 09:36.130 --> 09:38.730 a level headed woman to assist her. 09:38.730 --> 09:41.560 Big minded, not make any mischief. 09:43.160 --> 09:45.320 Difficult thing to ask of any woman. 09:45.320 --> 09:46.400 - Yes, quite. 09:48.130 --> 09:51.560 - So, if your wife were to approach my wife, 09:51.560 --> 09:55.800 I think the answer would be an unqualified yes. 09:55.800 --> 09:56.720 - Well, I... 09:56.720 --> 09:57.720 - Quernheim! 09:58.760 --> 10:01.800 (car motoring) 10:01.800 --> 10:03.960 (honking) 10:06.050 --> 10:08.550 - Can I give you a lift, my dears. 10:08.550 --> 10:11.330 - Many thanks, dear Susan, but we're just popping in 10:11.330 --> 10:14.170 to Godiva's for a few words. 10:14.170 --> 10:17.170 - Don't forget our little luncheon tomorrow week. 10:17.170 --> 10:18.590 - Oh, delightful. 10:20.400 --> 10:21.570 Proceed Drake. 10:28.450 --> 10:29.920 - Georgie. 10:29.920 --> 10:31.090 - Yes, I know. 10:32.160 --> 10:35.080 - The budgerigar tacked to her hat. 10:36.330 --> 10:38.960 - Wearing it in her hat. 10:38.960 --> 10:40.960 - Yes, dear, we noticed. 10:43.770 --> 10:46.050 Aren't you going to ask us in, Godiva? 10:46.050 --> 10:48.090 - You said you had something important to say. 10:48.090 --> 10:50.170 - Yes of course. Come on. 10:56.200 --> 10:58.250 It's about my tearoom. 10:58.250 --> 11:00.210 - Are you really going ahead with it? 11:00.210 --> 11:01.850 - Most certainly I am. 11:01.850 --> 11:03.370 You see, in here in my dining room 11:03.370 --> 11:04.410 will be the tearoom proper. 11:04.410 --> 11:05.760 My kitchen's there, and I can cook 11:05.760 --> 11:07.280 all sorts of lovely things. 11:07.280 --> 11:08.870 The big table will have to go, and I have lots 11:08.870 --> 11:11.320 of little tables and pots and flowers and things. 11:11.320 --> 11:14.130 Now, through here will be a kind of club room. 11:14.130 --> 11:15.690 Well, that will have to go against the wall. 11:15.690 --> 11:17.360 And all this will have to go. 11:17.360 --> 11:19.760 And I shall have about four card tables. 11:19.760 --> 11:22.200 Well, people might like a rubber after their tea, 11:22.200 --> 11:23.870 particularly if it's raining. 11:23.870 --> 11:25.410 - A word of warning, dear. 11:25.410 --> 11:27.520 You cannot provide facilities for gambling 11:27.520 --> 11:29.530 without risking a police raid. 11:29.530 --> 11:31.610 - In dear little Tilling at tea time? 11:31.610 --> 11:33.650 It's hardly likely. 11:33.650 --> 11:36.250 - Well anyway, we wish you and your tearoom 11:36.250 --> 11:40.360 godspeed, and all who sit in her, don't we? 11:40.360 --> 11:43.250 - Yes, and now me must sail off. 11:43.250 --> 11:44.530 - Yes of course, you're busy. 11:44.530 --> 11:48.570 But before you go, I must tell you I wrote you a letter. 11:48.570 --> 11:52.400 - How nice. I don't think I've received it yet. 11:52.400 --> 11:53.640 - I tore it up. 11:53.640 --> 11:55.310 - Good heavens, why? 11:56.240 --> 11:58.320 - It sounded as if I was begging. 11:58.320 --> 12:00.120 - You're hard up, dear? 12:00.120 --> 12:02.240 You need a small loan to start your tea shop? 12:02.240 --> 12:03.570 - No, no, no, nothing like that. 12:03.570 --> 12:05.480 Oh, you know what I mean. 12:05.480 --> 12:07.970 - I'm afraid I don't. 12:07.970 --> 12:10.360 - Don't hesitate to ask me to be your Mayoress, 12:10.360 --> 12:12.480 just because we're such friends. 12:12.480 --> 12:14.200 Well I've lived in Tilling all my life, 12:14.200 --> 12:17.360 and I can help you out with many a ticklish problem. 12:17.360 --> 12:20.280 - How very kind of you, Diva, dear. 12:23.570 --> 12:26.080 - So what are you going to do? 12:26.080 --> 12:28.090 - We shall give a small luncheon party 12:28.090 --> 12:31.770 for the contestants and their spouses. 12:31.770 --> 12:33.850 And then, I shall decide. 12:36.530 --> 12:38.610 (lively music) 12:38.610 --> 12:39.850 (clapping) 12:39.850 --> 12:41.600 Shall we all sit down. 12:41.600 --> 12:45.770 Just a simple crofter's meal, wherever you like, alfresco. 12:46.680 --> 12:49.210 - You mean higgeldy piggeldy. 12:49.210 --> 12:53.090 -[Lucia] Yes, dear, a rough translation. 12:53.090 --> 12:54.440 Now, where are we going to sit. 12:54.440 --> 12:56.860 Mrs. Wyse, will you sit here? 12:58.090 --> 13:00.170 - No dear Susan, I really cannot agree with you 13:00.170 --> 13:01.360 about the Girl Guides. 13:01.360 --> 13:03.650 Boy Scouts yes, all that campfire drill 13:03.650 --> 13:04.930 is good for discipline. 13:04.930 --> 13:07.760 - Hear, hear, zing a zing, boom boom. 13:07.760 --> 13:09.680 As old BP used to say. 13:09.680 --> 13:11.360 - But for girls, surely the best discipline 13:11.360 --> 13:12.470 is helping mother at home. 13:12.470 --> 13:14.250 Don't you agree dear hostess. 13:14.250 --> 13:16.280 - But does that make a girl self-sufficient, 13:16.280 --> 13:19.480 self-reliant, you know, good helpmeets. 13:19.480 --> 13:20.570 - Helpmeets? 13:20.570 --> 13:22.970 -[Benjy] As old BP used to say. 13:22.970 --> 13:26.690 - Well as for letting boy or girl play with matches. 13:26.690 --> 13:28.970 - Who's talking about matches, for heaven's sake? 13:28.970 --> 13:31.160 - Campfires, dear. You need matches. 13:31.160 --> 13:33.210 - Nonsense, you twiddle two sticks together. 13:33.210 --> 13:35.650 - Which brings me to the fire brigade. 13:35.650 --> 13:37.050 - Nothing the matter with it. 13:37.050 --> 13:38.970 - My dear, once there is fire, the whole of Tilling 13:38.970 --> 13:40.800 will be burnt to the ground. 13:40.800 --> 13:43.270 - Last week, wasn't there a fire out at the Trader's Arms? 13:43.270 --> 13:46.330 - Probably Benji boy, breathing out flammable fuels. 13:46.330 --> 13:47.330 (laughter) 13:47.330 --> 13:50.810 - I heard the gallant lads were there within three minutes 13:50.810 --> 13:52.920 and the fire put out in five more. 13:52.920 --> 13:56.240 - What we really need in Tilling is better street lighting. 13:56.240 --> 13:58.720 Sometimes coming home at night, our Royce has to crawl 13:58.720 --> 14:00.160 down to the whole street. 14:00.160 --> 14:02.560 - Stronger lights to your car Susan would do the trick. 14:02.560 --> 14:05.160 No, my priority would be the condition of the roads. 14:05.160 --> 14:07.570 - Outside our own house for a start, don't you know. 14:07.570 --> 14:09.610 - But surely, your prettier bird is outside 14:09.610 --> 14:12.030 the parish boundaries. 14:12.030 --> 14:12.870 - Grebes? 14:14.610 --> 14:16.440 Good god, I never knew that. 14:16.440 --> 14:18.160 - And something should be done about a quicker train 14:18.160 --> 14:19.650 service to London. 14:19.650 --> 14:24.410 - But how could that be a problem for the Tilling Council? 14:24.410 --> 14:27.480 - Cause I know the brother-in-law of one of the directors. 14:27.480 --> 14:29.250 - And as you know, my wife is the sister-in-law 14:29.250 --> 14:31.230 of the Comtesse de Faraglione. 14:31.230 --> 14:33.880 - What is needed is a firm hand. 14:33.880 --> 14:35.710 (speaking foreign language) 14:35.710 --> 14:36.970 - Susan now look here, your budgerigar! 14:36.970 --> 14:38.890 Your raspberry souffle. 14:43.010 --> 14:43.840 - No. 14:45.210 --> 14:47.960 (birds chirping) 14:51.710 --> 14:52.960 Foljambe, wait. 15:01.480 --> 15:03.630 No, give him to me. 15:03.630 --> 15:06.630 (sentimental music) 15:12.200 --> 15:13.920 (knocking at door) 15:13.920 --> 15:16.010 - You can't come in, whoever you are. 15:16.010 --> 15:18.470 - Georgie, how many people do you know 15:18.470 --> 15:20.320 who would want to see you in your bath 15:20.320 --> 15:22.330 at this hour of the morning? 15:22.330 --> 15:24.480 - It must be very important, good morning. 15:24.480 --> 15:27.560 - Yes, it is, good morning. 15:27.560 --> 15:28.970 - You mean you've decided? 15:28.970 --> 15:30.050 - Yes I have. 15:31.110 --> 15:32.530 - Who? 15:32.530 --> 15:34.860 - Mrs. Elizabeth Mapp-Flint. 15:36.490 --> 15:38.320 - Oh dear oh dear oh dear. 15:38.320 --> 15:39.450 - What as that? 15:39.450 --> 15:42.530 - Are you sure that's wise Lucia? 15:42.530 --> 15:45.680 - Would I consider it if it weren't? 15:45.680 --> 15:47.930 (grumbles) 15:51.440 --> 15:53.370 - Lucia, what do you make of my new hat? 15:53.370 --> 15:55.870 - Shhh, Georgie, I'm watching. 15:56.920 --> 15:57.760 - Sorry. 15:59.690 --> 16:00.850 - She's weakening. 16:00.850 --> 16:02.730 She's passed the house four times since breakfast. 16:02.730 --> 16:03.560 - Four 16:03.560 --> 16:04.390 - (gasps) 16:04.390 --> 16:05.230 What? 16:05.230 --> 16:06.060 - Coming again. 16:06.060 --> 16:06.890 - Where? 16:06.890 --> 16:07.730 - No! She'll see us. 16:07.730 --> 16:11.360 That's the fifth time, like a squirrel in a cage. 16:11.360 --> 16:12.960 - Look, she's just opposite. 16:12.960 --> 16:14.400 She's crossing the road. 16:14.400 --> 16:15.230 - No. 16:15.230 --> 16:16.070 - Yes, look. 16:16.070 --> 16:18.070 (gasps) 16:20.410 --> 16:22.640 There she is. (gasps) 16:22.640 --> 16:23.470 Oh. 16:23.470 --> 16:24.650 - Coming under the arches. 16:24.650 --> 16:27.690 - It's just like the boat races, isn't it? 16:27.690 --> 16:30.210 (phone rings) 16:30.210 --> 16:31.040 - Georgie. 16:31.040 --> 16:31.870 - What? 16:31.870 --> 16:32.930 - Into the garden. 16:32.930 --> 16:36.590 They'll never get it out if we're not alone. 16:41.370 --> 16:43.640 - Mrs. Mapp-Flint ma'am. 16:43.640 --> 16:47.410 Could she have a few moments on a private matter? 16:47.410 --> 16:51.570 - Yes, Grosvenor, tell her I can spare five minutes. 16:52.770 --> 16:54.350 - Very good, madam. 16:55.650 --> 16:58.320 Would you come in madam, please? 17:02.490 --> 17:03.490 - Lulu dear. 17:04.570 --> 17:07.650 (playful oboe music) 17:14.890 --> 17:15.880 - Mapp, stop! 17:15.880 --> 17:18.920 I want that prancing action. 17:18.920 --> 17:20.610 - Like that, my darling? 17:20.610 --> 17:21.880 - No, this way around. 17:21.880 --> 17:23.680 But stand on one leg. 17:23.680 --> 17:25.370 One arm forward, one arm back. 17:25.370 --> 17:27.620 Now hold it, Mapp, hold it. 17:31.320 --> 17:33.000 Half an hour more, Mapp. 17:33.000 --> 17:34.880 I never saw you so elastic. 17:34.880 --> 17:35.710 What's up? 17:35.710 --> 17:37.280 You've been seducing some young lad in the autumn 17:37.280 --> 17:38.170 of your life? 17:38.170 --> 17:40.900 - Oh, you shocking thing, naughty. 17:40.900 --> 17:43.450 No, I've just been having such a lovely talk 17:43.450 --> 17:45.250 with our sweet Lucia. 17:45.250 --> 17:46.280 Shall I tell you about it? 17:46.280 --> 17:47.690 Or shall I tease you. 17:47.690 --> 17:49.600 - Whatever you like, I don't care a blur. 17:49.600 --> 17:51.170 - I'll give a hint. 17:51.170 --> 17:53.560 Make a pretty curtsy to the Mayoress. 17:53.560 --> 17:54.410 - Rubbish. 17:54.410 --> 17:56.080 - Not rubbish, gospel. 17:56.080 --> 17:57.680 - Fill in the shading then. 17:57.680 --> 18:01.870 - Well, as you can imagine, it was an utter surprise to me. 18:01.870 --> 18:05.290 I was just strolling up by Mallards. 18:05.290 --> 18:08.200 I often stroll by to look at the sweet old home 18:08.200 --> 18:09.430 that used to be mine. 18:09.430 --> 18:10.890 - You can cut all that. 18:10.890 --> 18:12.480 - And I saw Lucia in the window looking 18:12.480 --> 18:14.400 oh so anxious and worn. 18:16.240 --> 18:18.730 Suddenly I had a presentiment. 18:18.730 --> 18:23.210 So I rang the bell and kind Grosvener let me in. 18:23.210 --> 18:26.200 And there was Lucia sitting at a table, 18:26.200 --> 18:27.250 absorbed in some papers. 18:27.250 --> 18:29.380 Wasn't that queer, for only a moment before 18:29.380 --> 18:32.360 I had seen her peeping out from behind the curtain. 18:32.360 --> 18:34.250 Then it came. 18:34.250 --> 18:36.440 I don't blame her for holding back. 18:36.440 --> 18:39.080 Kind of pride, I suppose, which she found 18:39.080 --> 18:40.840 difficult to swallow. 18:40.840 --> 18:45.000 She said, beloved friend, I cannot undertake 18:45.000 --> 18:47.190 my duties without your support. 18:47.190 --> 18:48.680 (screams) 18:48.680 --> 18:50.640 - Mapp, you make me sick. 18:50.640 --> 18:52.030 Alright she asked you to be Mayoress, 18:52.030 --> 18:53.940 but it didn't happen like that. 18:53.940 --> 18:55.200 - Gospel. 18:55.200 --> 18:57.570 And when Georgie came in, he kissed my hand. 18:57.570 --> 18:58.880 - Well here they come. 18:58.880 --> 19:00.970 It'll be pretty to see their gratitude. 19:00.970 --> 19:02.480 Don't go Mapp. 19:02.480 --> 19:04.810 - I must, so much to do now. 19:06.080 --> 19:09.250 - First beloved, is it true about Mayoress Mapp? 19:09.250 --> 19:10.690 - She's told you then? 19:10.690 --> 19:11.720 - Told me? 19:11.720 --> 19:13.080 I should say she did. 19:13.080 --> 19:15.960 She also said you'd swallowed your pride at last. 19:15.960 --> 19:17.120 - What? 19:17.120 --> 19:19.440 - That it was her duty to help you. 19:19.440 --> 19:20.680 - Poor thing. 19:20.680 --> 19:23.730 Like all habitual liars, she deceives herself 19:23.730 --> 19:25.120 far more than she does others. 19:25.120 --> 19:27.490 - But aren't you going to do anything? 19:27.490 --> 19:29.520 - Dear Irene, you wouldn't want me 19:29.520 --> 19:31.400 to lower myself to her level. 19:31.400 --> 19:34.320 - Well I know what I'm going to do. 19:38.650 --> 19:41.730 (seagulls squawking) 19:56.250 --> 19:57.650 - Why didn't you tell me? 19:57.650 --> 19:58.480 - What? 19:58.480 --> 20:00.120 - Weren't you reading the Tilling Gazette at breakfast? 20:00.120 --> 20:01.590 - Only the sports page and obits. 20:01.590 --> 20:03.510 - Well what about that? 20:04.720 --> 20:05.640 - Good god. 20:07.440 --> 20:10.420 - Quaint Irene, a bit of fun I thought. 20:10.420 --> 20:11.440 - Leave it to me, old girl. 20:11.440 --> 20:12.610 Where's my whip? 20:12.610 --> 20:13.440 - Whip? 20:13.440 --> 20:14.690 - The one I hit the tiger in the face 20:14.690 --> 20:16.120 with before I shot him. 20:16.120 --> 20:16.950 - Oh that one. 20:16.950 --> 20:18.360 - What's the name of that new editor? 20:18.360 --> 20:21.040 - No idea, look at the headline, Mrs. Mapp-Flint, 20:21.040 --> 20:22.290 the new Mayoress of Tilling. 20:22.290 --> 20:24.560 - He'll regret the day he was born. 20:24.560 --> 20:26.720 I can promise you that. 20:26.720 --> 20:29.720 (suspenseful music) 20:47.840 --> 20:50.670 (patriotic music) 20:51.770 --> 20:53.770 (crash) 21:07.410 --> 21:08.680 - Where's the wee fire? 21:08.680 --> 21:12.850 - No one is going to insult my wife, while I'm above ground. 21:32.010 --> 21:33.170 Out of my way. 21:36.490 --> 21:40.160 (typewriter keys clacking) 21:40.160 --> 21:43.890 The new editor, whatever his name is, immediately. 21:43.890 --> 21:46.240 - You wish to see Mr. McConnell, sir? 21:46.240 --> 21:48.320 - If that is his name, at once. 21:48.320 --> 21:50.000 - I think he's busy at the moment. 21:50.000 --> 21:53.420 But please sit down, and I'll go and see. 22:13.330 --> 22:15.490 Mr. McConnell's very sorry, but he'll be tied up 22:15.490 --> 22:17.320 for a quarter of an hour yet. 22:17.320 --> 22:18.370 - A quarter of an hour? 22:18.370 --> 22:20.710 I haven't come here to. 22:20.710 --> 22:23.050 My name is Major Mapp-Flint. 22:24.130 --> 22:26.480 - Mr. McConnell says to pass the time, 22:26.480 --> 22:29.900 wouldn't you please care to take a drink? 22:32.400 --> 22:33.240 - Drink? 22:34.400 --> 22:35.980 Quarter of an hour? 22:37.610 --> 22:39.210 Very well. 22:39.210 --> 22:42.970 - Perhaps you better help yourself, sir. 22:42.970 --> 22:44.470 - Just as you say. 22:53.490 --> 22:57.320 (continuously pouring liquid) 22:59.600 --> 23:01.640 (typing continues) 23:01.640 --> 23:04.160 (knocking on door) 23:04.160 --> 23:07.400 - Excuse me, madam, but it's half past one. 23:07.400 --> 23:09.640 - Thank you Withers, I'm well aware of that. 23:09.640 --> 23:12.240 - But cook says the Rose on toast is spoiling. 23:12.240 --> 23:13.570 - Well if the rose on toast is spoiled, 23:13.570 --> 23:15.010 we shall have to go on to the next course. 23:15.010 --> 23:17.680 - But cook says the mutton's spoiling too. 23:17.680 --> 23:19.610 - Then we shall all have to go down to Mrs. Plaistow's 23:19.610 --> 23:20.800 and have high tea. 23:20.800 --> 23:23.210 - Oh very good, madam. 23:23.210 --> 23:27.120 (drunken chatter and laughter) 23:29.280 --> 23:30.770 - This is Withers, she'll take your hat. 23:30.770 --> 23:32.160 Thank you Withers. 23:32.160 --> 23:35.560 Yes, yes, I know, a little tardy, but, but. 23:35.560 --> 23:37.280 - I was wondering where you've got to. 23:37.280 --> 23:40.090 - This is where I've got to Mrs. Mapp-Flint. 23:40.090 --> 23:44.260 Allow me to present my very good friend, Mr. McConnell, 23:45.600 --> 23:47.840 the new editor of the Tilling Gazette. 23:47.840 --> 23:50.330 Mr. McConnell, Mrs. Flapp-Mint. 23:50.330 --> 23:54.290 - Charmed Mrs. Mapp-Flint, I've heard so much about you. 23:54.290 --> 23:56.690 A veritable pillar of the community. 23:56.690 --> 24:00.840 - Our new Mayoress, no less. A veritable pilling of chillar. 24:00.840 --> 24:02.450 - You'll stay to luncheon, I hope. 24:02.450 --> 24:04.930 - It is for luncheon for which I have invited him. 24:04.930 --> 24:08.680 - Then if you'll excuse me, pour a moment, 24:08.680 --> 24:10.050 while I inform my staff. 24:10.050 --> 24:14.970 I hope you like rose on toast and soups en coup de mutton. 24:14.970 --> 24:15.800 - Potluck you know. 24:15.800 --> 24:18.050 - I'm so hungry, I could eat the leg off the piano. 24:18.050 --> 24:20.300 (laughter) 24:23.640 --> 24:25.230 - Where's the whip? 24:26.570 --> 24:27.650 - Whip? 24:27.650 --> 24:29.200 - The one you took with you. 24:29.200 --> 24:30.290 - Whip? Whip? 24:31.530 --> 24:33.690 (snoring) 24:35.240 --> 24:36.240 - A bientot. 24:40.440 --> 24:41.270 (claps) 24:41.270 --> 24:43.360 - So, sir Peg, Quernheim. 24:49.240 --> 24:50.070 - Withers! 24:52.570 --> 24:55.160 - I cannot make head nor tail of it, Mr. Pillson. 24:55.160 --> 24:57.130 - It's Elizabeth Mapp, Padre. 24:57.130 --> 24:58.920 - Without a doubt. But she's you know. 24:58.920 --> 25:00.970 - You know I think I can detect quaint Irene's 25:00.970 --> 25:03.320 fine Italian hand behind that. 25:03.320 --> 25:05.770 - This I say call it, is a dress rehearsal. 25:05.770 --> 25:08.210 To make sure that things are running smoothly. 25:08.210 --> 25:11.200 - Oh very wise, Mrs. Plaistow. 25:11.200 --> 25:14.050 - Now as you see Mr. Georgie, there are two sorts of jam, 25:14.050 --> 25:15.010 thick and clear. 25:15.010 --> 25:17.440 - Thick and clear, is that not soup, dear me. 25:17.440 --> 25:18.270 (laughter) 25:18.270 --> 25:21.560 - They're both beautifully clear, lovely hot, crisp toast. 25:21.560 --> 25:23.960 - Yes, there should have been pastry fingers, too. 25:23.960 --> 25:25.320 But they wouldn't rise. 25:25.320 --> 25:27.450 - Oh, tiresome thing. 25:27.450 --> 25:28.810 - But you must imagine them being here 25:28.810 --> 25:29.920 for the Schilling tea. 25:29.920 --> 25:31.510 - Oh thank you very much. 25:31.510 --> 25:33.390 - For the Wallace Tea, there will also be potted meat 25:33.390 --> 25:35.140 sandwiches and cream. 25:36.830 --> 25:38.690 - May I pop in for a moment. 25:38.690 --> 25:40.320 I have not seen you for so long. 25:40.320 --> 25:43.160 Mr. Georgie, Padre, how do you do? 25:44.720 --> 25:46.390 May I squiggle past? 25:47.760 --> 25:51.130 (indiscriminate fussing) 25:51.130 --> 25:54.280 I squiggled. Now then, thank you dear. 25:54.280 --> 25:55.660 There we are. 25:55.660 --> 25:57.970 - Now Elizabeth, China or Indian? 25:57.970 --> 25:59.600 - Indian, thank you. 25:59.600 --> 26:01.810 No sugar, just a drop of milk. 26:01.810 --> 26:04.280 Godiva, dear, what a pretty table cloth. 26:04.280 --> 26:05.850 And such lovely flowers. 26:05.850 --> 26:08.770 Quite like having tea in the garden without the earwigs. 26:08.770 --> 26:09.600 - Earwigs. 26:09.600 --> 26:10.960 - Won't you have some tea while you're waiting? 26:10.960 --> 26:12.530 - Oh thank you. 26:12.530 --> 26:13.890 - Oh thank you Padre. 26:13.890 --> 26:15.480 Yes, there would've been pastry fingers, 26:15.480 --> 26:16.310 but they wouldn't rise. 26:16.310 --> 26:18.320 - Oh by the by, Mistress Mapp-Flint, 26:18.320 --> 26:20.630 have you seen the Gazette? 26:20.630 --> 26:23.800 - Haven't set eyes on it for years, Padre. 26:23.800 --> 26:26.200 Though with Mr. McConnell at the helm, 26:26.200 --> 26:27.480 Benji brought him home for luncheon today, 26:27.480 --> 26:31.310 such an intelligent man, I must take it in. 26:31.310 --> 26:32.150 Delicious. 26:33.370 --> 26:36.360 I can see I shant be having tea at home very often. 26:36.360 --> 26:37.870 (laughter) 26:37.870 --> 26:39.570 - Hot buttered toast. 26:39.570 --> 26:40.980 - What a banquet. 26:44.000 --> 26:45.360 - If I could. 26:45.360 --> 26:47.030 - Thank you so much. 26:48.650 --> 26:51.060 She was brilliant, brilliant. 26:52.040 --> 26:53.690 Never gets the Tilling Gazette, so never 26:53.690 --> 26:56.600 even saw quaint Irene's photograph. 26:57.730 --> 26:59.640 Delighted to welcome one of Major Benji's new 26:59.640 --> 27:01.760 best friends to lunch. 27:01.760 --> 27:03.760 Mapp lies rather brilliant. 27:03.760 --> 27:06.200 - I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. 27:06.200 --> 27:07.790 What is a messuage. 27:10.490 --> 27:14.650 - It's probably some misprint for message. Or massage? 27:15.610 --> 27:17.200 - Neither makes any sense. 27:17.200 --> 27:19.570 - Oh well there we are then. 27:19.570 --> 27:21.200 Well don't stay up too late. 27:21.200 --> 27:23.000 Tomorrow's the day, don't forget. 27:23.000 --> 27:26.170 - I am fully aware of that, goodnight. 27:28.460 --> 27:32.880 - You know, Lucia, you've picked a very good Mayoress. 27:32.880 --> 27:36.320 Can talk her way out of anything. 27:36.320 --> 27:37.320 Buona notte. 27:42.880 --> 27:44.450 (slams newspaper shut) 27:44.450 --> 27:47.330 - And I sit there, with my eyes closed, 27:47.330 --> 27:50.880 and my pencil in my hand, and Blue Birdy by my side. 27:50.880 --> 27:53.010 And he seems to say, tweet tweet, 27:53.010 --> 27:56.160 and my pencil begins to write. 27:56.160 --> 27:57.520 But I never know what it writes. 27:57.520 --> 28:01.440 It's a queer, scrawly hand, not a bit like mine. 28:01.440 --> 28:04.410 - 11 shilling ones so far, two one and six penny ones, 28:04.410 --> 28:06.010 but the cream's getting low. 28:06.010 --> 28:08.560 I've had to add milk to it. 28:08.560 --> 28:11.520 - Then he seems to say, tweet tweet, 28:11.520 --> 28:13.440 and I say goodbye dear. 28:14.890 --> 28:17.360 - What sort of things does it write? 28:17.360 --> 28:19.370 - Oh all sorts of things. 28:19.370 --> 28:24.240 For example, this morning it kept on writing Mayor. 28:24.240 --> 28:28.610 - You mean Blue Birdy has something to say to me? 28:28.610 --> 28:31.150 - No dear, not Mayor. 28:31.150 --> 28:33.040 - Oh you mean the French word, maire. 28:33.040 --> 28:35.280 - Exactly, or something like that. 28:35.280 --> 28:37.360 (crash of dishes) 28:37.360 --> 28:39.860 - Only a cup and the milk jug. 28:41.380 --> 28:45.000 - Before we start, I have to say this, 28:45.000 --> 28:48.270 bridge by all means, but not for money. 28:48.270 --> 28:49.720 No gambling. 28:49.720 --> 28:52.720 - They can hardly call a penny a hundred gambling. 28:52.720 --> 28:54.650 - It's the principle Georgie. 28:54.650 --> 28:58.080 Look at Twistevant's son, backing horses, in debt, 28:58.080 --> 29:00.840 married and a baby coming. 29:00.840 --> 29:03.080 All the result of gambling. 29:03.080 --> 29:07.210 - But Worship, how is the baby the result of gambling? 29:07.210 --> 29:09.120 - Lizzy Bettie wouldn't have one. 29:09.120 --> 29:10.920 (laughter) 29:10.920 --> 29:14.160 - I have my position as Mayor to think of. 29:14.160 --> 29:16.120 - I venture to say, dear, you will not be invited 29:16.120 --> 29:17.720 to many bridge parties. 29:17.720 --> 29:19.520 - Dealer may as well pick up at Hansay. 29:19.520 --> 29:21.080 Seven no trumps doubled and redoubled 29:21.080 --> 29:23.640 without even looking at it. 29:23.640 --> 29:25.980 - Well, I do see your point. 29:27.330 --> 29:30.490 For just this once and for the last time, 29:30.490 --> 29:32.010 a penny a hundred. 29:32.010 --> 29:32.840 - Hoorah. 29:33.970 --> 29:35.220 - Lucia, Lucia. 29:37.510 --> 29:39.880 - Yes dear, what is it? 29:39.880 --> 29:42.550 - Inspector Morrison to see you. 29:43.560 --> 29:45.570 - Did he ask for me personally? 29:45.570 --> 29:48.320 - Yes. He knew you were here. 29:48.320 --> 29:51.080 And my tearoom will be closed. Gambling. 29:51.080 --> 29:52.080 It's a raid. 29:53.930 --> 29:55.680 - The rest of you go out the back way. 29:55.680 --> 29:57.170 I'll receive the inspector in here, 29:57.170 --> 29:58.640 just sitting quietly. 29:58.640 --> 30:00.930 - There isn't a back way. 30:00.930 --> 30:02.320 - We're trapped. 30:02.320 --> 30:05.640 - Sit down. Cards on the table. 30:05.640 --> 30:07.140 Godiva, your tray. 30:08.680 --> 30:09.600 - Oh Lucia. 30:10.570 --> 30:11.730 - Show him in. 30:16.410 --> 30:19.170 - Yes, yes, Mrs. Wyse, you could say 30:19.170 --> 30:21.250 that the League of Nations has collapsed 30:21.250 --> 30:22.730 like a house of cards. 30:22.730 --> 30:24.160 - Or a ruin. 30:24.160 --> 30:25.650 - Quite, quite. 30:25.650 --> 30:28.050 - Inspector Morrison. 30:28.050 --> 30:30.040 - Thank you very much. 30:30.040 --> 30:32.880 - Yes, Inspector, Did you want me? 30:34.520 --> 30:36.210 - Yes, your Worship, good afternoon. 30:36.210 --> 30:38.120 Good afternoon, all. 30:38.120 --> 30:40.080 It's a summon's needs your signature. 30:40.080 --> 30:41.080 It's urgent. 30:43.370 --> 30:47.920 - I am always available for magisterial business. 30:47.920 --> 30:48.750 - I too. 30:51.290 --> 30:54.120 - On the dotted line, your Worship. 30:54.120 --> 30:57.620 - May I borrow your fountain pen, Georgie? 31:03.050 --> 31:05.130 - Allow me, your Worship. 31:07.760 --> 31:09.510 Excuse me, Mrs. Wyse. 31:14.090 --> 31:16.340 There we are, your Worship. 31:25.690 --> 31:27.690 Thank you, your Worship. 31:36.210 --> 31:39.530 Very sorry to interrupt your game, madam. 31:39.530 --> 31:41.160 - Not at all. 31:41.160 --> 31:43.730 You were only doing your duty. 31:43.730 --> 31:45.080 - Good day to you all. 31:45.080 --> 31:46.000 - Good day. 31:51.770 --> 31:53.330 - I still maintain that playing bridge 31:53.330 --> 31:55.750 without gambling can be quite exciting. 31:55.750 --> 31:58.010 - Well I can't see it's catching on, but there we are. 31:58.010 --> 32:02.170 - Sometimes Georgie, I don't feel I have your full support. 32:03.390 --> 32:04.770 - Well, it's in the same ratio as 32:04.770 --> 32:06.840 Victoria and Albert, isn't it, after all... 32:06.840 --> 32:08.830 - Oh, look out! 32:08.830 --> 32:09.660 Oh! 32:11.480 --> 32:13.570 Georgie, are you alright? 32:14.640 --> 32:15.890 - Tiresome boy. 32:17.290 --> 32:19.760 I'd report him if I knew who it was. 32:19.760 --> 32:21.090 - Isn't that odd. 32:21.090 --> 32:21.970 - What? 32:21.970 --> 32:24.050 - I feel quite envious, not angry. 32:24.050 --> 32:27.920 Exhilarating, what Lawrence of Arabia always loved. 32:27.920 --> 32:28.830 Such speed. 32:31.200 --> 32:33.530 I really must get a bicycle. 32:36.840 --> 32:39.360 I'm beginning to feel quite secure Cadman. 32:39.360 --> 32:41.000 You can let go for a second. 32:41.000 --> 32:42.090 - Yes, ma'am. 32:42.090 --> 32:42.920 - Ooooh! 32:42.920 --> 32:43.850 - Brake, madam. 32:43.850 --> 32:46.400 Brake, no that's the bell, madam. 32:46.400 --> 32:49.610 Brake! Brake, left hand handle bar. 32:49.610 --> 32:50.690 Brake, ma'am. 32:52.130 --> 32:54.790 (playful music) 33:00.870 --> 33:03.040 (yelling) 33:09.410 --> 33:11.450 (bike bell dings) 33:11.450 --> 33:13.450 - Crikes. Hold on ma'am. 33:17.520 --> 33:19.760 (crash) 33:19.760 --> 33:20.600 - Oh. Oh. 33:27.250 --> 33:28.670 Oh, I'm so sorry. 33:31.070 --> 33:32.600 I'm rather new at it. 33:32.600 --> 33:33.800 - I guessed that, ma'am. 33:33.800 --> 33:34.630 - Oh dear. 33:34.630 --> 33:36.680 - Let me give you a hand. 33:36.680 --> 33:37.850 - Thank you so much. 33:37.850 --> 33:39.290 Thank you so much. 33:39.290 --> 33:40.640 - No bones broken, I hope. 33:40.640 --> 33:43.230 - Oh dear, no I don't think so. 33:48.660 --> 33:49.810 - Have a look at your bike. 33:49.810 --> 33:51.130 - Is it alright? 33:51.130 --> 33:53.470 - Built to last, these things. 33:53.470 --> 33:54.920 - I think you're right. 33:54.920 --> 33:57.510 Oh dear, would half a crown be. 34:00.760 --> 34:01.930 - Well, ma'am. 34:03.370 --> 34:06.530 - Oh dear, I have no reticule with me. 34:10.590 --> 34:11.840 - Are you alright, madam. 34:11.840 --> 34:13.800 - Yes, Cadman, thank you. 34:13.800 --> 34:15.850 Would you give this gentleman half a crown. 34:15.850 --> 34:16.760 - Oh certainly ma'am. 34:16.760 --> 34:20.080 (coins clinking) 34:20.080 --> 34:21.410 - Thanks very much. 34:21.410 --> 34:25.090 - Now, I shall continue to the end of the road, 34:25.090 --> 34:27.280 turn round, and then come back. 34:27.280 --> 34:28.800 - Shall I accompany you, ma'am. 34:28.800 --> 34:32.320 - Thank you Cadman, no. I can manage now. 34:32.320 --> 34:35.720 By the way, did you see Mr. Georgie? 34:35.720 --> 34:37.160 No? 34:37.160 --> 34:38.730 Far behind. 34:38.730 --> 34:40.560 - I imagine so, ma'am. 34:45.870 --> 34:47.190 - That's very good, sir. 34:47.190 --> 34:48.030 - Is it? 34:48.030 --> 34:50.850 - Now why don't you put your feet on the pedals now? 34:50.850 --> 34:51.680 - Alright. 34:53.040 --> 34:54.130 Can you help? 34:58.430 --> 35:01.370 Oh yes, thank you Foljambe, no traffic? 35:01.370 --> 35:02.650 - No traffic, sir. 35:02.650 --> 35:03.930 (bell dings) 35:03.930 --> 35:04.910 - Off we go. 35:04.910 --> 35:05.750 - Goodbye sir. 35:05.750 --> 35:06.580 - Goodbye. 35:08.300 --> 35:10.300 - That's very good, sir. 35:12.800 --> 35:14.970 (yelling) 35:45.240 --> 35:46.660 - Back again. Oh! 35:47.810 --> 35:49.810 (crash) 35:50.670 --> 35:52.650 - You've done it again, ma'am. 35:52.650 --> 35:56.410 - Quite the last thing I wanted to do. 35:56.410 --> 35:58.000 Another half a crown? 35:58.000 --> 36:01.120 - Well, if you insist, ma'am. 36:01.120 --> 36:02.090 - Cadman. 36:02.090 --> 36:03.000 - Ma'am. 36:03.000 --> 36:05.050 - Thank you very much. 36:05.050 --> 36:07.710 (playful music) 36:17.400 --> 36:19.090 (yelling) 36:19.090 --> 36:21.740 (crash) 36:21.740 --> 36:23.910 - Oh dear. Tiresome thing. 36:27.360 --> 36:28.200 Oh dear. 36:33.350 --> 36:36.600 Good day, I see the road goes that way. 36:39.530 --> 36:41.860 Well, no damage done anyway. 36:45.600 --> 36:47.180 - Well I never did. 36:49.480 --> 36:52.230 (coins clinking) 36:53.960 --> 36:58.000 Oh, five bob's the going rate, Guv'nor. 36:58.000 --> 36:59.050 - Five shillings. 36:59.050 --> 37:00.880 - Thank you very much. 37:02.320 --> 37:05.990 Would the lady be coming back this way, sir? 37:07.010 --> 37:08.180 By any chance? 37:14.330 --> 37:15.990 - Stop, madam, stop! 37:17.370 --> 37:19.930 Madam, in the name of the law, I ask you to stop. 37:19.930 --> 37:22.640 Now see here, whoever you are. 37:22.640 --> 37:23.920 - Yes, Inspector? 37:23.920 --> 37:26.650 - Oh, beg your pardon, Worship. 37:26.650 --> 37:28.840 - You were about to say? 37:28.840 --> 37:30.650 - Nothing Worship, nothing at all. 37:30.650 --> 37:34.690 - No, no, no, no, no. We can't have that. 37:34.690 --> 37:36.200 - Can't have what, Worship? 37:36.200 --> 37:38.570 - One law for the rich, and another for the poor. 37:38.570 --> 37:41.180 I was riding at a dangerous speed. 37:41.180 --> 37:45.180 Ignorance as to where my brake was is no excuse. 37:46.210 --> 37:49.390 You will proceed with a summons. 37:49.390 --> 37:51.480 - Very good, Worship. 37:51.480 --> 37:52.360 But I don't know what people are going to say 37:52.360 --> 37:54.650 about me arresting the Mayor. 37:54.650 --> 37:58.770 - Oh, too terrible, fined 20 shillings for speeding, 37:58.770 --> 38:00.880 the Mayor, fined 20 shillings. 38:00.880 --> 38:03.600 She brought the office of Mayor into contempt. 38:03.600 --> 38:06.000 Perhaps in mere self-respect, I should resign 38:06.000 --> 38:07.760 from being Mayoress. 38:07.760 --> 38:10.650 - Well if you feel that strongly, mistress Mapp-Flint, 38:10.650 --> 38:12.530 it's no bad a notion. 38:12.530 --> 38:14.130 - Not a bad notion at all. 38:14.130 --> 38:16.930 - On the other hand, I should hate to desert her 38:16.930 --> 38:20.250 in her troubles, such friends as we are. 38:20.250 --> 38:22.360 - Well if you'll forgive me, ladies. 38:22.360 --> 38:24.730 I'm off on my wee cycle lesson. 38:24.730 --> 38:27.230 So useful for tootling around the parish. 38:27.230 --> 38:29.190 - Au reservoir Padre. 38:29.190 --> 38:30.210 (bike bell chimes) 38:30.210 --> 38:32.850 - The trouble with you Mapp, one of them, 38:32.850 --> 38:36.120 is that you can't give Lucia credit where credit is due. 38:36.120 --> 38:38.010 Get over it dear, make an effort, 38:38.010 --> 38:39.280 be more Christian. 38:39.280 --> 38:41.360 - Thank you for your interest in my character Godiva. 38:41.360 --> 38:45.080 I shall know whom to come to when in spiritual perplexity. 38:45.080 --> 38:46.390 - Pleased to advise you. 38:46.390 --> 38:48.330 And when I get my bicycle, I shall lend it to you 38:48.330 --> 38:50.210 for 10 minutes and see how you get on. 38:50.210 --> 38:51.240 - Look forward to it. 38:51.240 --> 38:52.670 Then I'll pop into your tea rooms and see if your 38:52.670 --> 38:56.610 sardine tartlets are an improvement on the last batch. 38:56.610 --> 38:57.530 - Charming! 39:00.040 --> 39:01.650 (bell chimes) 39:01.650 --> 39:03.760 - Make way there, make way. 39:03.760 --> 39:04.590 Thank you. 39:11.840 --> 39:14.260 (horn honks) 39:22.680 --> 39:25.760 (playful vocalizing) 39:27.660 --> 39:29.010 - Are we ready, Doris? 39:29.010 --> 39:30.430 - We are, Harold. 39:31.640 --> 39:32.730 - Here we go. 39:36.880 --> 39:39.380 (bell chimes) 39:45.250 --> 39:47.360 - My hat's coming off. 39:47.360 --> 39:49.570 (laughs) 39:49.570 --> 39:51.740 - Look out Mapp, look out. 39:53.730 --> 39:55.720 - Next thing you know, Susan Wyse will be abandoning 39:55.720 --> 39:58.130 her Royce and taking to her bicycle. 39:58.130 --> 40:00.210 - Oh don't be silly Mapp. 40:10.250 --> 40:13.170 (pebbles on glass) 40:20.970 --> 40:23.370 - Mr. Wyse, what ever? 40:23.370 --> 40:26.640 - Gracious lady, may I have a word with you? 40:26.640 --> 40:28.770 - Of course, but. 40:28.770 --> 40:32.770 - I don't want to be observed by all and sundry. 40:36.600 --> 40:39.690 - I shall open the front door myself. 40:58.130 --> 41:00.240 - What is it, Mr. Wyse? 41:00.240 --> 41:03.090 - Today you'll receive an invitation from Susan 41:03.090 --> 41:07.130 to attend a seance chez nous this afternoon. 41:07.130 --> 41:10.640 - What a refreshing change after all my bicycling. 41:10.640 --> 41:14.570 - But Mrs. Lucas, I mean Mrs. Pillson, I mean, Worship, 41:14.570 --> 41:17.960 Susan is becoming unhinged, sadly changed. 41:17.960 --> 41:21.410 No interest in life, her Royce, her fur coat, 41:21.410 --> 41:24.090 her bridge, the game that is, 41:24.090 --> 41:27.530 nothing but Blue Birdy's shrine. 41:27.530 --> 41:29.280 - But how can I help? 41:30.160 --> 41:33.690 - I have here in my very hand the source 41:33.690 --> 41:35.360 of all our troubles. 41:38.570 --> 41:39.650 - Blue Birdy? 41:41.480 --> 41:43.280 But what would I do with it? 41:43.280 --> 41:46.370 - Place it somewhere unknown to me so that I can 41:46.370 --> 41:50.540 truthfully tell Susan that I don't know where it is. 41:52.880 --> 41:53.880 - Very well. 41:58.330 --> 42:00.520 Isn't there a slight odor? 42:00.520 --> 42:03.920 - Harmless disinfectant, worshipful lady. 42:03.920 --> 42:08.280 - But um, what will happen this afternoon at the seance? 42:08.280 --> 42:11.000 - When she finds out that Blue Birdy has vanished, 42:11.000 --> 42:13.930 I hope that that will be the end of it. 42:13.930 --> 42:16.810 Dear Worship, will you please, please think 42:16.810 --> 42:20.640 of some way of rearranging her disarrangement? 42:22.520 --> 42:26.020 - As it happens, I do have some experience 42:27.000 --> 42:29.770 of psychical phenomenon. 42:29.770 --> 42:33.850 - I should've know. I shall leave it to you then. 42:36.410 --> 42:38.280 - How you are welcome. 42:38.280 --> 42:42.040 - Oh thank you, thank you worshipful lady, a bientot. 42:42.040 --> 42:43.040 - A bientot. 43:01.130 --> 43:03.810 I have been told many times that I would make 43:03.810 --> 43:06.920 a marvelous medium, if of course, I had the time 43:06.920 --> 43:09.960 to devote to it, which of course with my mayoral duties. 43:09.960 --> 43:10.800 - Hush. 43:24.720 --> 43:27.050 Surely I heard, tweet tweet. 43:29.810 --> 43:31.500 Is that you, darling? 43:31.500 --> 43:32.330 So soon. 43:34.040 --> 43:38.900 It must be you Lucia, contributing your psychic force. 43:38.900 --> 43:41.650 - Very likely, my dear. 43:41.650 --> 43:44.400 - Tweet tweet, there it is again. 43:45.970 --> 43:48.130 - Buona serra, Blue Birdy. 43:49.430 --> 43:51.050 (gasps) 43:51.050 --> 43:53.720 I felt a little brush of soft feathers on my cheek. 43:53.720 --> 43:55.140 - Did you really? 43:56.310 --> 43:57.150 Wait. 44:02.930 --> 44:05.520 (screams) 44:05.520 --> 44:07.170 It's empty. 44:07.170 --> 44:10.420 - Oh, something wonderful has happened. 44:11.850 --> 44:14.100 Blue Birdy has flown aloft. 44:16.530 --> 44:18.210 - I had no idea, dear. 44:18.210 --> 44:21.880 - I had, the de-materialization is complete. 44:23.840 --> 44:25.490 - But what does it mean? 44:25.490 --> 44:29.660 - All is spirit, wrapped with all of him that was mortal 44:31.560 --> 44:33.140 in a higher sphere. 44:34.050 --> 44:36.040 - A higher sphere, dear. 44:36.040 --> 44:38.050 - But won't he ever come back? 44:38.050 --> 44:41.600 - Oh you cannot be so selfish as to want that. 44:41.600 --> 44:43.210 - No indeed. 44:43.210 --> 44:45.790 - He is free and bound no more. 44:47.970 --> 44:50.550 - I should miss him dreadfully. 44:51.400 --> 44:53.970 - Oh you cannot, you cannot, 44:53.970 --> 44:57.040 you mustn't grudge him his freedom. 44:57.040 --> 44:59.130 (crying) 45:01.560 --> 45:05.310 What a privilege it has been to have assisted 45:05.310 --> 45:07.730 at such a de-materialization. 45:09.410 --> 45:12.660 - We are greatly in your debt, Worship. 45:21.610 --> 45:22.650 -[Georgie] Morning Grosvenor. 45:22.650 --> 45:24.040 -[Grosvenor] Morning, sir. 45:24.040 --> 45:25.180 -[Georgie] It's a lovely day. 45:25.180 --> 45:26.240 -[Grosvenor] Yes indeed sir. 45:26.240 --> 45:28.000 -[Georgie] Sorry I'm a bit late. 45:28.000 --> 45:29.400 -[Grosvenor] I'll bring your breakfast now, sir. 45:29.400 --> 45:31.610 - Oh, how very kind of you, thank you so much. 45:31.610 --> 45:33.210 Oh, morning Lucia. 45:33.210 --> 45:35.790 - Good afternoon. Quite rested? 45:38.080 --> 45:40.720 - Oh I feel quite tired, as a matter of fact. 45:40.720 --> 45:43.040 I expect I shall have a nap after breakfast. 45:43.040 --> 45:44.960 - Well I have finished. 45:45.840 --> 45:48.490 Poor Worship has to go and dictate. 45:48.490 --> 45:50.170 - Well there we are, then. 45:50.170 --> 45:52.340 Another silly bill. 45:52.340 --> 45:55.720 Oh, there's a letter from Olga. 45:55.720 --> 45:56.800 - Olga? 45:56.800 --> 45:58.070 - Yes, Olga Bracely. 45:58.070 --> 45:59.960 You remember, she rented the cottage at Riseholme 45:59.960 --> 46:01.370 a few summers ago. 46:01.370 --> 46:03.450 - Ah, yes, a prima donna. 46:04.490 --> 46:05.930 - Absoluta. 46:05.930 --> 46:09.400 - Charming voice. Some notes lovely. 46:09.400 --> 46:11.610 You were rather taken with her. 46:11.610 --> 46:13.720 - Oh yes, but she did make me laugh. 46:13.720 --> 46:15.290 Let me read you what she says. 46:15.290 --> 46:18.250 - Didn't she come to my house with some 46:18.250 --> 46:21.160 Italian, a so-called musician? 46:21.160 --> 46:22.530 - Yes, Cortesa. 46:22.530 --> 46:23.360 - Was that his name? 46:23.360 --> 46:24.370 - Yes it was. 46:24.370 --> 46:27.330 - A cacophony, as I remember, some noisy 46:27.330 --> 46:28.690 attempt at an opera. 46:28.690 --> 46:31.680 - Well anyway, she's back from a world tour 46:31.680 --> 46:35.970 and she'll be singing in his Lucretia at the opera house 46:35.970 --> 46:38.250 next week, gala performance. 46:38.250 --> 46:41.610 I'm invited with a guest, a box. 46:41.610 --> 46:44.810 Oh and lunch the following day at the Cardon Bleu. 46:44.810 --> 46:47.370 - How kind of her, dear thing, but I mean, 46:47.370 --> 46:49.690 does she realize how difficult it is for me 46:49.690 --> 46:52.930 to get away from Tilling and my duties as Mayor. 46:52.930 --> 46:54.600 - Actually she doesn't have the slightest 46:54.600 --> 46:55.800 awareness that we're married, let alone 46:55.800 --> 46:57.530 that you're the Mayor. 46:57.530 --> 46:59.760 (laughs) 46:59.760 --> 47:01.610 She's such a scream. 47:01.610 --> 47:02.770 Well, I'm sorry if you don't feel you'll be able 47:02.770 --> 47:05.240 to come, but I shall go anyway. 47:05.240 --> 47:06.320 Olga Bracely. 47:08.240 --> 47:11.520 - Well I'll try to manage it somehow dear 47:11.520 --> 47:12.440 for your sake. 47:12.440 --> 47:14.730 Shall I write a letter, accepting? 47:14.730 --> 47:19.570 - No, no, there's no need, the invitation was to me. 47:19.570 --> 47:21.400 (sniffing) Curious smell. 47:21.400 --> 47:22.230 (crackling fire) 47:22.230 --> 47:24.560 Like bon fritters. 47:24.560 --> 47:26.010 Anyway, you've already explained in great length 47:26.010 --> 47:28.110 that you'll be much too busy. 47:28.110 --> 47:29.640 I shouldn't bother. 47:29.640 --> 47:31.730 (laughs) 47:33.410 --> 47:35.170 Oh, she's such a silly. 47:35.170 --> 47:37.250 (laughs) 47:44.370 --> 47:45.780 Tiresome cobbles. 47:47.210 --> 47:49.490 - There he goes now, king of my heart. 47:49.490 --> 47:51.930 - I have just been to post a letter to Olga Bracely. 47:51.930 --> 47:53.040 - Not the prima donna. 47:53.040 --> 47:53.880 - Absoluta. 47:53.880 --> 47:55.690 - Georgie, you've not been misbehaving? 47:55.690 --> 47:57.080 - She's a very old friend. 47:57.080 --> 47:58.570 - That's what I meant. 47:58.570 --> 48:00.010 - We have been invited to a gala performance 48:00.010 --> 48:01.470 at the opera house this week. 48:01.470 --> 48:04.330 - What a temptation you are, Georgie, with your beard 48:04.330 --> 48:06.650 and your little bloomers. 48:06.650 --> 48:08.010 - And wither goest thou? 48:08.010 --> 48:10.440 - To London on U train to the Royal Academy. 48:10.440 --> 48:11.650 - To submit an oeuvre? 48:11.650 --> 48:14.970 - Why not, the council here want none of it. 48:14.970 --> 48:17.520 Would you like a peek? 48:17.520 --> 48:19.650 - Oh, but they've got dressed. 48:19.650 --> 48:20.480 - So. 48:21.400 --> 48:23.320 - Well, it's very unlike you, isn't it? 48:23.320 --> 48:25.490 - It's very unlike Botticelli. 48:25.490 --> 48:27.880 - But isn't that a bit like your snapshot of Mapp 48:27.880 --> 48:28.760 in the Tilling Gazette? 48:28.760 --> 48:29.890 - Yes. 48:29.890 --> 48:31.840 - And won't people say that's rather like Major Benji 48:31.840 --> 48:32.720 up there in the clouds? 48:32.720 --> 48:35.190 - Of course they will, stupid, unless they're blind. 48:35.190 --> 48:36.590 - Well don't you think... 48:36.590 --> 48:39.570 - I never think, Georgie, I feel. 48:39.570 --> 48:42.280 If the Royal Academy accepts this, it'll punch 48:42.280 --> 48:44.530 the lousy grundies of Tilling in the face. 48:44.530 --> 48:46.130 - It certainly will. 48:46.130 --> 48:48.680 (laughs) 48:48.680 --> 48:52.100 (pleasant melodic music)55188

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