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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:13,871 You must remember this 2 00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:16,543 A kiss is still a kiss 3 00:00:16,583 --> 00:00:21,783 A sigh is just a sigh 4 00:00:21,822 --> 00:00:25,816 The fundamental things apply 5 00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:29,387 As time goes by. 6 00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:39,665 - Morning, Mum. - Oh, I thought you'd have gone! 7 00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,902 - Nice weekend? - Yes. 8 00:00:41,942 --> 00:00:44,070 Yes, it was. 9 00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:46,410 - And how was...? - Any more coffee in the pot? 10 00:00:46,446 --> 00:00:48,745 - Yeah, I'll get you one. - No, I'll get it. 11 00:00:49,182 --> 00:00:51,014 How was Aunt Penny? 12 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:54,488 Much as usual. Depressing. She asked after you. 13 00:00:54,521 --> 00:00:57,514 "How's poor Judith?" 14 00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,550 "Poor LITTLE Judith", actually. 15 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,358 Did Uncle Stephen get a word in edgeways? 16 00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:04,058 Just the one! 17 00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:09,031 - What about Lionel? - What ABOUT Lionel? 18 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:12,267 Why do you say it like that? 19 00:01:12,306 --> 00:01:15,765 All I said was, "What about Lionel?" 20 00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:17,505 No, you said, "What ABOUT Lionel?" 21 00:01:17,544 --> 00:01:22,380 - Not at the office? - I've a meeting at ten. 22 00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:26,615 When I started there, I was at my desk at 8 am. 23 00:01:26,653 --> 00:01:30,146 Working by gaslight. 24 00:01:30,190 --> 00:01:34,855 Candle-light, actually! One candle only, of course! 25 00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,558 So, what ABOUT Lionel? 26 00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,624 Oh, not again! What about Lionel? 27 00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:42,431 Well, did he have a nice weekend? 28 00:01:42,469 --> 00:01:47,134 - Bet he didn't. - Well, he did, actually. 29 00:01:47,174 --> 00:01:51,475 Oh? I was expecting you back last night. 30 00:01:51,511 --> 00:01:55,949 We were having such a nice time, we decided to stay. 31 00:01:55,983 --> 00:01:57,076 I see! 32 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,450 So we did! 33 00:01:59,486 --> 00:02:04,424 It's a funny sort of place to have a nice time -Aunt Penny's. 34 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:08,725 - Where's the meeting? - Fitzroy Square. 35 00:02:08,762 --> 00:02:09,991 Shouldn't you be on your way? 36 00:02:10,030 --> 00:02:11,862 Yes, I suppose I should. 37 00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:17,634 I'm glad you had a nice time. 38 00:02:17,671 --> 00:02:22,939 Well, I'm glad... you're glad I had a nice time! 39 00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:25,445 I'll see you later! 40 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:30,774 - Morning, boss. - Morning, Sandy. 41 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:34,811 Post. Mostly routine. Mostly downright dull. 42 00:02:34,855 --> 00:02:36,346 - Any cheques? - Some. 43 00:02:36,390 --> 00:02:38,052 Then it's not all that dull. 44 00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:41,391 - Nice weekend? - Yes, thank you. 45 00:02:41,428 --> 00:02:44,956 - I'm glad. - Good. 46 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:48,059 No, I mean I'm really glad! I like Lionel! 47 00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:51,196 - You've been talking to Judith! - Yes. 48 00:02:51,238 --> 00:02:56,074 She said that you and Lionel had gone away for the weekend. 49 00:02:56,109 --> 00:02:57,839 That's all. 50 00:02:57,878 --> 00:03:00,473 Well, we did NOT go away for the weekend. 51 00:03:00,514 --> 00:03:03,177 - Judith made it up? - No. 52 00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:05,913 - You're not making sense. - I am. 53 00:03:05,952 --> 00:03:10,356 Lionel and I spent a few days with my sister-in-law. 54 00:03:10,390 --> 00:03:13,485 We did not "go away for the weekend". 55 00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:17,191 - What's the difference? - Oh, Sandy! 56 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:19,563 You're so touchy! 57 00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:21,591 My private life is my business! 58 00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:23,001 Okay! 59 00:03:24,337 --> 00:03:27,068 - I'm glad. - What about? 60 00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:30,202 Well, that after all these years you've got a private life! 61 00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:31,302 Sandy! 62 00:03:31,344 --> 00:03:33,006 Oh, someone's at the door. 63 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:36,844 - Good morning. - Well, good morning! 64 00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:39,819 - Is Jean free? - Oh, for you...? 65 00:03:39,853 --> 00:03:42,379 It's your P.L. 66 00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:45,392 - Oh, hello, Lionel. - Hello. 67 00:03:45,425 --> 00:03:47,189 I'll close the door, shall I? 68 00:03:48,762 --> 00:03:51,095 - Hello, Lionel. - Hello. 69 00:03:51,965 --> 00:03:54,332 - What's a P.L.? - I don't know. 70 00:03:54,367 --> 00:03:56,563 Oh, yes, I do. Private Life. 71 00:03:56,603 --> 00:03:59,095 Oh. Rather impertinent. 72 00:03:59,139 --> 00:04:00,198 Impertinent? 73 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,005 - Nosey, then. - Yes, I'd accept nosey. 74 00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:05,911 Judy's as bad. "Nice weekend? How's Lionel?" 75 00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:08,609 - And you said? - I said you were fine. 76 00:04:08,648 --> 00:04:12,483 - You know what I mean. - I said nothing. 77 00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:19,289 It's flattering being the objects of youthful curiosity at our time of life. 78 00:04:19,326 --> 00:04:21,522 I'm fed up with it! 79 00:04:21,561 --> 00:04:25,225 And I don't like the "our time of life" much either! 80 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,564 As Alistair says, 81 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:33,370 "If pressed on personal matters, smile mischievously and say "Hey!""" 82 00:04:33,406 --> 00:04:35,932 - Not us! - No. 83 00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:37,638 YES? 84 00:04:37,677 --> 00:04:41,114 Don't snarl! It's Atwells on the phone. 85 00:04:41,148 --> 00:04:42,776 MISTER Atwell, actually. 86 00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:44,876 - Tell him I'll ring him back. - Okay. 87 00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,848 - When? - Oh, soon. 88 00:04:48,789 --> 00:04:52,726 Sorry, I'm rather rushed today. 89 00:04:52,759 --> 00:04:57,322 I just wanted Penny's phone number. I think I've left my watch there. 90 00:04:57,364 --> 00:05:00,994 - I'll phone her. - If you're too busy... 91 00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:02,400 Don't push it! 92 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:07,939 I still can't get used to seeing you as an executive woman. 93 00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:10,671 Look silly if I was a junior nurse, wouldn't it? 94 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,440 - Free for lunch? - Yeah, fine. 95 00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:17,541 Ah, Penny? 96 00:05:17,584 --> 00:05:19,018 It's Jean. 97 00:05:19,052 --> 00:05:20,748 ..I'm fine, thank you. 98 00:05:20,787 --> 00:05:23,279 Yes, he's fine too. 99 00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,815 It was a lovely weekend. Thank you very much. 100 00:05:26,626 --> 00:05:29,619 Oh, a kleptomaniac, I think. 101 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:32,360 Lionel thinks he left his watch at the cottage. 102 00:05:33,366 --> 00:05:34,698 ..Would you? 103 00:05:34,734 --> 00:05:38,068 Oh, yes, all right. Okay, bye. 104 00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:41,703 She's going to ring back. 105 00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:45,542 - Kleptomaniac? - You're treating one. 106 00:05:45,579 --> 00:05:48,174 To Penny, you're a psychiatrist. 107 00:05:48,215 --> 00:05:51,811 Mm. Why? 108 00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:53,377 You didn't want to talk about the book. 109 00:05:53,420 --> 00:05:59,451 - But why a psychiatrist? - I'll see one and ask! 110 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,256 I'll be off. 111 00:06:01,294 --> 00:06:03,456 - See you for lunch. - Yeah, fine. 112 00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:06,398 Oh, I'd like a chat about something. 113 00:06:06,433 --> 00:06:09,961 - What about? - Em... 114 00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:12,472 Us taking a holiday together. 115 00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:14,598 Ooh! 116 00:06:14,641 --> 00:06:16,507 - Cheerio, Sandy. - Bye. 117 00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:22,477 You're not into spritzers, are you? 118 00:06:22,515 --> 00:06:27,647 I'm not into diluted wine, nor am I into this suit. 119 00:06:27,687 --> 00:06:30,350 You look the biz! 120 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,757 Mutton dressed as lamb. 121 00:06:32,792 --> 00:06:34,420 A waitress gave you a look. 122 00:06:34,461 --> 00:06:36,157 Couldn't believe her eyes. 123 00:06:36,196 --> 00:06:38,131 It was admiration! 124 00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:41,191 She has poor eyesight! 125 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:44,136 You don't think this'll help sell a book? 126 00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:46,036 You'd be surprised. 127 00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:49,065 Not since knowing you. 128 00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:52,136 - I'll take that as a compliment. - Thought so. 129 00:06:53,213 --> 00:06:54,943 Do you know what that suit says? 130 00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:57,450 Yes. "Take me off." 131 00:06:57,484 --> 00:07:02,115 Wrong. It says, "Hold up. Coffee planters can be cool dudes!" 132 00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:04,954 Is this to do with the "hey" business? 133 00:07:04,991 --> 00:07:07,085 Right! 134 00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:11,292 Speaking of which... How shall I put this? 135 00:07:11,331 --> 00:07:15,860 - Carefully, I hope. - No, hold it for tonight. 136 00:07:15,902 --> 00:07:21,136 - Am I giving a pop concert tonight? - Dinner! You, me, Jean, Judy. 137 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,803 Before we go over the top with the book. 138 00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:26,813 You're always going over the top. 139 00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:31,045 We're using "over the top" in a different sense. 140 00:07:31,084 --> 00:07:32,643 Ye-es. 141 00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:34,416 You and Jean are still on for tonight? 142 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:39,256 Yes. I'd forgotten. Sorry. You're seeing a lot of Judith. 143 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,955 We, er... hang out. 144 00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:44,521 What exactly does that mean? 145 00:07:44,564 --> 00:07:45,862 Hey, hey! 146 00:07:47,567 --> 00:07:49,160 She looked at you again. 147 00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:51,535 Couldn't believe what she saw last time! 148 00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:54,869 No... 149 00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:58,305 Pop round to the house and I'll make an omelette. 150 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,910 In about 20 minutes? Fine. 151 00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:05,749 Penny? No, she hasn't phoned. Bye. 152 00:08:05,785 --> 00:08:08,880 Remember we're having dinner with Alistair tonight. 153 00:08:08,922 --> 00:08:10,515 How could I forget? 154 00:08:11,558 --> 00:08:13,493 Deep down, he's very sweet. 155 00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:17,054 I just wish he was intelligible! 156 00:08:17,097 --> 00:08:20,226 He can be! 157 00:08:20,266 --> 00:08:21,996 Sandwiches for the workers. 158 00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:23,003 What about the queen bee? 159 00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:26,564 She's popping home for lunch. 160 00:08:26,606 --> 00:08:28,165 - With Lionel. - Oh? 161 00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:31,872 We got tired of sandwiches in the park! 162 00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:35,279 - I didn't say anything! - Cosier at home. 163 00:08:35,315 --> 00:08:37,284 You two are getting very tiresome. 164 00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:43,150 She's getting rattled. 165 00:08:44,057 --> 00:08:45,582 She is NOT! 166 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:53,159 - They're going on holiday. - Are they? 167 00:08:54,434 --> 00:08:56,426 I'll get it. Noble soul. 168 00:08:58,905 --> 00:09:01,101 Good afternoon, Type For You. 169 00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:05,078 Oh, hello, Aunt Penny. No, she just left. 170 00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:10,106 You've found Lionel's watch. I didn't know he'd left it. 171 00:09:10,150 --> 00:09:12,676 Yes. Right. 172 00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:15,279 Under where? 173 00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:18,281 Under their bed? 174 00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:25,031 No, no, Aunt Penny, I'm on my lunch-break. 175 00:09:25,065 --> 00:09:27,557 You just chatter away as much as you want to! 176 00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,364 This is rather good. 177 00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:36,934 Oh, we have a domestic side, we executive women. 178 00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:40,970 More comfortable than the park benches as well. 179 00:09:41,014 --> 00:09:42,676 We should do this every day. 180 00:09:42,715 --> 00:09:47,983 You think so? What about my executive side? 181 00:09:48,021 --> 00:09:50,252 Sorry. I forgot! 182 00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:51,690 It's not a hobby! 183 00:09:51,724 --> 00:09:53,317 Don't get prickly. 184 00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:58,354 Work isn't something I do in my spare time! 185 00:09:58,398 --> 00:10:00,833 Too many men have made that assumption. 186 00:10:00,867 --> 00:10:02,597 - What men? - Oh, men. 187 00:10:02,635 --> 00:10:06,902 - Men you've known? - Not necessarily. 188 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,500 You must've known them all to know they made the assumption. 189 00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:11,977 Well... 190 00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:15,641 - I'm not asking for figures. - You're not getting figures! 191 00:10:15,682 --> 00:10:21,781 - Anyway, you mentioned a holiday. - Ah. Right. 192 00:10:21,821 --> 00:10:25,349 - I've been offered a cruise. - What on? 193 00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:27,326 A ship. 194 00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:30,194 I mean, who offered you the cruise? 195 00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:31,858 It's odd. 196 00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:35,835 - You know the lecture circuit I'm on? - "My Life I n Kenya". 197 00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:40,569 - A chap on the circuit... - "My Life In Clapham"? 198 00:10:40,607 --> 00:10:42,200 - Be quiet! - Sorry! 199 00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:45,610 Well, he somehow got himself a cruise. 200 00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:48,240 Six days of luxury for three talks. 201 00:10:48,281 --> 00:10:49,840 Said it was a doddle. 202 00:10:49,883 --> 00:10:53,979 He thinks, if he recommends me to the Line, 203 00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:57,479 - it'd be the Mediterranean. - Well, well! 204 00:10:57,524 --> 00:11:02,986 - I knew there must be some perks! - Have a nice time 205 00:11:03,029 --> 00:11:05,760 You could come too! He took his wife. 206 00:11:05,798 --> 00:11:07,926 - I'm not your wife. - That's all right. 207 00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:13,099 Nobody seems to bother. We could put down "companion". 208 00:11:13,139 --> 00:11:16,576 No! Rich old ladies have companions! 209 00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:19,511 - Does it matter what you're called? - Yes. 210 00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:25,178 - I can't put "old sweetheart"! - What about "nurse"? 211 00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:34,123 No, no, no. Look, we'll just put you down as your name. 212 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:35,753 What do you say to the captain? 213 00:11:35,795 --> 00:11:40,665 - Why should I say anything to him? - You're the celebrity speaker! 214 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:46,332 - How are you going to introduce me? - "This is my friend..." 215 00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,536 "Jean Pargetter, who is sharing my cabin!" 216 00:11:49,576 --> 00:11:51,010 No! 217 00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,478 He'd know it. 218 00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:55,311 Why the concern about the captain? 219 00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:58,147 It's the other people nudging each other and saying, 220 00:11:58,184 --> 00:12:04,886 "She's not a new model, is she?" I'm tired of it. 221 00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:10,886 I see. Well, you make a compelling case for not wanting to come. 222 00:12:10,930 --> 00:12:14,833 - I'm sorry, Lionel. - It was free as well. 223 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:24,905 - What was all that for? - To prevent myself from hitting you! 224 00:12:24,944 --> 00:12:26,572 Ask me why? Go on! 225 00:12:26,613 --> 00:12:29,981 - Why? - I'd be a freebie! 226 00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:35,387 A hanger-on. "Is she included?" "Oh, sure, chuck her in!" 227 00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:40,416 - That's not the way I think of it. - I'm going back to work! 228 00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:42,395 What if I ask for separate cabins? 229 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:46,165 I wonder if they'd stretch to that. 230 00:12:52,572 --> 00:12:53,767 Taxi! 231 00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:25,469 Nice lunch? 232 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:28,532 One more personal question this afternoon, and you're out. 233 00:13:28,574 --> 00:13:29,974 That goes for you too! 234 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:39,513 So much for love in the afternoon. 235 00:13:39,552 --> 00:13:41,453 They should stick to sandwiches! 236 00:14:18,758 --> 00:14:19,953 Ah. 237 00:14:19,992 --> 00:14:22,018 I'd like to see your commander-in-chief. 238 00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:24,053 She's out. 239 00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:26,089 Do you expect me to believe that? 240 00:14:26,132 --> 00:14:31,400 - Yes, I DO as a matter of fact! - Well, I don't. 241 00:14:33,773 --> 00:14:36,641 - I'd like to talk to your mother. - She's out. 242 00:14:36,676 --> 00:14:39,976 - Do you expect me to believe that? - He said that to me! 243 00:14:40,012 --> 00:14:41,742 - Well, do you? - Yes. 244 00:14:41,781 --> 00:14:42,874 Huh! 245 00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:47,313 - A cup of coffee? - No, thanks. 246 00:14:47,353 --> 00:14:50,050 - A wine gum? - No, thanks. 247 00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:52,251 I'm waiting for you to produce your mother. 248 00:14:52,291 --> 00:14:55,159 Biologically impossible. 249 00:14:55,194 --> 00:14:56,787 Not funny. 250 00:14:56,829 --> 00:15:01,164 - Neither is being called a liar. - Right. 251 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,135 Jean just went out? 252 00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:07,938 I have days like this. 253 00:15:07,974 --> 00:15:09,943 I don't suppose you know where she's gone. 254 00:15:09,976 --> 00:15:10,976 Yes. 255 00:15:11,010 --> 00:15:12,569 - Are you going to tell me? - No. 256 00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:15,013 Look, we don't know. She just went. 257 00:15:15,047 --> 00:15:19,417 - Rather early, isn't it? - That's up to her. 258 00:15:21,554 --> 00:15:26,458 We had a bit of a disagreement. I suppose she told you. 259 00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:28,017 No. 260 00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:30,393 Then why are you taking sides? 261 00:15:32,732 --> 00:15:36,430 Oh, I see. All girls together. 262 00:15:36,469 --> 00:15:41,407 - What if I called you a boy? - I'd say your mind had snapped. 263 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:42,704 Exactly! 264 00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:48,339 - She likes Mum. - Oh. So I gathered. 265 00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:55,484 - This misunderstanding... - Look, I don't want to know! 266 00:15:55,521 --> 00:15:58,616 - Perhaps I put it badly. - What? 267 00:15:58,658 --> 00:16:03,153 I told her that I could possibly get a lecture job on a ship 268 00:16:03,196 --> 00:16:05,097 and she could come along free. 269 00:16:09,101 --> 00:16:11,002 I think I'll go. 270 00:16:13,739 --> 00:16:17,039 - Four hundred. - Three. 271 00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:19,944 Four. 272 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:22,278 Three and a half. 273 00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:25,774 Mr Atwell, if you want girls on a regular basis... 274 00:16:27,453 --> 00:16:32,153 Girls on a regular basis! There's quite a double meaning there! 275 00:16:32,191 --> 00:16:39,291 Is there really If you want SECRETARIES on a regular basis, 276 00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:41,494 we're talking of regular salaries. 277 00:16:41,534 --> 00:16:44,026 Are you sure you wouldn't like a drink? 278 00:16:44,070 --> 00:16:45,663 Yes. 279 00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:49,107 - Afraid it might go to the head? - Yes, something like that. 280 00:16:49,141 --> 00:16:53,579 Such an attractive little lady. Such a strong will. 281 00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:55,980 It's four. 282 00:16:56,015 --> 00:17:00,248 - Look, dear... - Don't call me "dear". 283 00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:01,754 Sorry. 284 00:17:01,787 --> 00:17:05,986 Just a term of endearment. 285 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:08,290 - Mr Atwell... - Cyril. 286 00:17:08,327 --> 00:17:11,422 Mr Atwell, we have no need of endearments. 287 00:17:11,464 --> 00:17:14,628 We're talking business. 288 00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,863 - Three and a half. - Four. 289 00:17:16,903 --> 00:17:20,499 - I've got a time-share. - Really? 290 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:25,478 Marbella. Through-lounge, all ethnic-tiled, 291 00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:28,845 microwave, sun deck, use of pool. 292 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:33,080 Maria comes every day. She's very good despite the limp. 293 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,486 - Is this relevant? - Think about it. 294 00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:39,049 I have, fast. Four. 295 00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:43,586 You misunderstand me. I wasn't inviting YOU. 296 00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:44,756 Oh. 297 00:17:44,797 --> 00:17:47,995 No, I thought perhaps you and Hubby might... 298 00:17:48,034 --> 00:17:50,526 I don't have a hubby. 299 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:51,765 Poor woman. 300 00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:55,605 I'm not a poor woman, I'm a businessman... woman! 301 00:17:55,641 --> 00:17:57,803 That's all? 302 00:17:57,843 --> 00:18:02,178 You make it sound as if it should have black edges round it. 303 00:18:02,214 --> 00:18:06,276 - It explains a lot. - It doesn't. Four! 304 00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:12,589 - Three and three-quarters. - Four. 305 00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:14,526 You're a tough lady. 306 00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:17,325 Not a rascal or a rogue? 307 00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:22,992 - I'm not with you. - No, never mind! 308 00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:26,005 - You little business ladies... - Four. 309 00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:28,767 Four. 310 00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,607 Li, Li, Li... 311 00:18:32,411 --> 00:18:35,347 I hate being called Li, let alone Li, Li, Li! 312 00:18:35,381 --> 00:18:38,579 What did I do or say that was so terrible? 313 00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:40,883 You admitted you were on a freebie! 314 00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:45,085 - I said perk. - Same thing, different generation. 315 00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:47,218 Perks are fine, 316 00:18:47,259 --> 00:18:51,321 but never tell your lady that SHE's on a freebie. 317 00:18:51,364 --> 00:18:53,560 It's not flattering. 318 00:18:53,599 --> 00:18:55,295 - It's honest. - Li, 319 00:18:55,334 --> 00:18:59,169 we are talking man-woman, not about honesty. 320 00:18:59,205 --> 00:19:03,267 I'm out of touch with women. 321 00:19:03,309 --> 00:19:07,178 What about the romance with Jean early in the century? 322 00:19:07,213 --> 00:19:10,047 - Middle of the century! - So it was. 323 00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:15,680 Oh, that was... Well, understanding each other didn't come into it. 324 00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:19,681 - It must've been something! - It was. 325 00:19:19,725 --> 00:19:25,164 Then there was no relationship that required me to understand women. 326 00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:26,961 Your wife? 327 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,490 She didn't want to be understood. 328 00:19:28,534 --> 00:19:33,165 It would've been an intrusion. 329 00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:36,698 - Jean IS coming tonight? - She WAS, 330 00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:42,147 but in the prevailing climate, she may not support this book business. 331 00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:47,245 Actually, that may not be entirely a bad thing. 332 00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:50,779 It's the Three Graces rolled into two women! 333 00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:52,689 That makes us one and a half women each! 334 00:19:55,127 --> 00:19:58,359 - Lionel. - Hello. Hello, Judith. 335 00:19:58,397 --> 00:20:00,525 - Sandy's forgiven you. - What for? 336 00:20:00,566 --> 00:20:03,365 - All I said was... - Oh, one of those! 337 00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:05,871 - Shall we take in some bubbles? - Judith. 338 00:20:08,741 --> 00:20:10,141 Excuse me. 339 00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:12,870 - Cheers. - Cheers. 340 00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:15,347 - Mm, cheers. - Cheers. 341 00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,405 Thank you. 342 00:20:17,583 --> 00:20:21,179 - What do you think? - Oh, it's Lionel. 343 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,951 - I like it. - I feel a twerp! 344 00:20:23,989 --> 00:20:28,051 Lionel, it's the biz! A friend fixed us up! 345 00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:29,289 Another perk 346 00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:32,488 Shall we order? 347 00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:36,195 Actually, I've put ordering on hold. 348 00:20:36,235 --> 00:20:38,670 Let's do the stuff first then mungus. 349 00:20:38,704 --> 00:20:42,266 Sorry, I only understood every other word. 350 00:20:42,308 --> 00:20:45,506 Alistair wants to talk about the book first, then eat. 351 00:20:45,544 --> 00:20:47,536 Judy can interpret! 352 00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:53,710 Sorry. I try to keep up with the young fellows. 353 00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:58,714 Right, we have ignition. We publish in a week. 354 00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,786 Then, hopefully, Lionel will be in the public eye. 355 00:21:02,828 --> 00:21:05,821 - In this suit! - Which they will love. 356 00:21:05,865 --> 00:21:08,892 Part of the image. 357 00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:11,335 If the public gets interested in an author, 358 00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:13,532 they get interested in the book. 359 00:21:13,572 --> 00:21:16,906 If only you'd published Shakespeare... 360 00:21:16,942 --> 00:21:20,037 - I'm serious. - So is Judy! 361 00:21:20,079 --> 00:21:22,810 Look, we don't want to suggest that 362 00:21:22,848 --> 00:21:27,252 My Life In Kenya is simply the story of a coffee planter. 363 00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:30,814 - But it is. - WE know that, mate, 364 00:21:30,856 --> 00:21:36,796 but we want to hint that that guy didn't JUST plant coffee. 365 00:21:36,829 --> 00:21:40,095 - We're back to the "hey, hey" thing! - Right! 366 00:21:40,132 --> 00:21:44,866 Look, if you want to persist with this ridiculous fiction... 367 00:21:44,904 --> 00:21:47,738 He sells books! 368 00:21:47,773 --> 00:21:52,677 - But what's it to do with me now? - To believe the "then", 369 00:21:52,711 --> 00:21:57,615 we have to believe that the "now" is still half-way "then". 370 00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,084 Judy? 371 00:21:59,118 --> 00:22:01,952 You've got to appear a bit of an old dog. 372 00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:03,285 Hardly! 373 00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:05,587 That's where you come in. 374 00:22:05,624 --> 00:22:10,221 Do I follow him around saying, "He's an old dog!"? 375 00:22:10,262 --> 00:22:16,691 You're one hell of a lady but, for the sake of the book, 376 00:22:16,735 --> 00:22:19,432 I don't want you to follow him around at all. 377 00:22:19,471 --> 00:22:21,940 - Oh... I see. - Alistair! 378 00:22:21,974 --> 00:22:23,840 I'm not talking people. 379 00:22:23,876 --> 00:22:26,846 - I'm talking business. - I know the difference! 380 00:22:26,879 --> 00:22:28,780 What? 381 00:22:28,814 --> 00:22:33,548 Being seen with a mature lady doesn't fit the "old dog" image. 382 00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:34,645 I see. 383 00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:36,918 - No offence. - It's business. 384 00:22:36,956 --> 00:22:38,754 In that case, bugger business! 385 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:46,931 But for her, I'd have packed the bloody thing in! 386 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:50,027 She encouraged me and even persuaded me 387 00:22:50,069 --> 00:22:53,870 that your mad ideas actually made sense! 388 00:22:53,906 --> 00:22:57,240 But this one doesn't, Alistair. 389 00:22:57,276 --> 00:23:00,041 If Jean has the will, or the stamina, or the time 390 00:23:00,079 --> 00:23:04,414 to help me sell this book, I'll feel gratitude. 391 00:23:04,450 --> 00:23:06,976 You'd better get used to it. 392 00:23:07,019 --> 00:23:13,152 Oh, and I'll feel something else as well, and that's proud. 393 00:23:13,192 --> 00:23:15,286 Right, may we see a menu, please? 394 00:23:24,870 --> 00:23:26,702 Not fancy coming on somewhere? 395 00:23:26,739 --> 00:23:30,176 We'd be asleep by the time we got there! 396 00:23:30,209 --> 00:23:33,577 Then we'd go inside and fall asleep again! 397 00:23:33,612 --> 00:23:35,342 See you for the book launch then? 398 00:23:36,949 --> 00:23:38,542 With my walking frame 399 00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:40,610 I'll wear the suit. 400 00:23:40,653 --> 00:23:44,021 - You like it? - No. I'll just wear it. 401 00:23:44,056 --> 00:23:46,116 Good. See you. 402 00:23:46,158 --> 00:23:49,890 'Night, Mum. Goodnight, you. 403 00:23:53,232 --> 00:23:58,967 Oh, by the way, Aunt Penny phoned. She found Lionel's watch. 404 00:23:59,004 --> 00:24:00,939 It was under your bed apparently. 405 00:24:03,642 --> 00:24:04,905 'Night. 406 00:24:18,490 --> 00:24:20,118 Are you dropping off? 407 00:24:20,159 --> 00:24:22,185 Too many late nights. 408 00:24:22,227 --> 00:24:24,128 Have you had many recently? 409 00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:25,461 Just tonight. 410 00:24:28,734 --> 00:24:32,694 - Quite a speech you made tonight. - I just said what I thought. 411 00:24:32,738 --> 00:24:35,572 That's why it was quite a speech. 412 00:24:35,607 --> 00:24:38,975 I'm sorry I was so ratty about the cruise. 413 00:24:39,011 --> 00:24:40,240 Probably won't come off. 414 00:24:40,279 --> 00:24:42,373 If it does, I'm your shipmate! 415 00:24:43,916 --> 00:24:46,715 I was offered a time-share in Marbella this afternoon. 416 00:24:46,752 --> 00:24:48,516 Oh, yes? 417 00:24:48,554 --> 00:24:53,356 No, I don't get those offers now! He wanted me to bring the hubby. 418 00:24:53,392 --> 00:24:56,624 - Hubby? - He was that kind of chap. 419 00:24:56,662 --> 00:24:59,461 He referred to women as "little ladies". 420 00:24:59,498 --> 00:25:01,467 Which hospital's he in? 421 00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,560 I hit him where it really hurt - in his wallet! 422 00:25:06,005 --> 00:25:09,942 - You used to get "those offers"? - Yes. 423 00:25:09,975 --> 00:25:11,944 - Did you...? - Mind your own business! 424 00:25:11,977 --> 00:25:13,639 Right. 425 00:25:13,679 --> 00:25:15,375 No, I didn't. 426 00:25:15,414 --> 00:25:19,875 It was the woman alone in business. 427 00:25:19,918 --> 00:25:23,411 - It's called sexual harassment now. - Gosh, you're moving with the times! 428 00:25:23,455 --> 00:25:26,391 I heard it from the town crier! 429 00:25:26,425 --> 00:25:28,018 What was it called then? 430 00:25:28,060 --> 00:25:30,529 Putting up with it. 431 00:25:30,562 --> 00:25:34,966 When David died, he didn't leave much money, and there was Judith. 432 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:39,700 I just started here. Me and a telephone and a typewriter. 433 00:25:39,738 --> 00:25:42,139 It's in a museum now! 434 00:25:42,174 --> 00:25:45,576 - But you made it? - Yes. 435 00:25:45,611 --> 00:25:49,241 The highest compliment that a male client thinks he can pay me is, 436 00:25:49,281 --> 00:25:51,546 "My God, you're as tough as a man!" 437 00:25:55,587 --> 00:25:59,854 If we hadn't lost touch... 438 00:25:59,892 --> 00:26:03,886 would you have wanted to go into business then? 439 00:26:03,929 --> 00:26:05,955 Would you have wanted me to? 440 00:26:05,998 --> 00:26:08,343 In the light of this conversation, that's a leading question! 441 00:26:08,367 --> 00:26:09,391 I know. 442 00:26:11,070 --> 00:26:14,802 - No, I wouldn't. - No, I thought not. 443 00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:18,038 - Would you have wanted to? - THAT's a leading question! 444 00:26:18,077 --> 00:26:22,572 - It was my turn! - All right, then. No. 445 00:26:22,614 --> 00:26:25,812 I would've cooked for us and our 15 children 446 00:26:25,851 --> 00:26:28,150 and become a Mother Earth figure! 447 00:26:28,187 --> 00:26:29,883 Don't tell anyone! 448 00:26:31,857 --> 00:26:33,450 - Oh! - Oh! 449 00:26:33,492 --> 00:26:36,894 What are we going to do about that smirk on Judy's face? 450 00:26:36,929 --> 00:26:38,158 Questions will be asked. 451 00:26:38,197 --> 00:26:40,757 - Not in The House? - I hope not. 452 00:26:40,799 --> 00:26:44,292 Any idea what to say? 453 00:26:45,571 --> 00:26:47,199 I have. 454 00:26:47,239 --> 00:26:51,904 Alistair talks a lot of twaddle but he has one handy phrase... 455 00:26:51,944 --> 00:26:54,504 - Hey, hey! - Hey, hey! 456 00:27:02,488 --> 00:27:05,117 You must remember this 457 00:27:05,157 --> 00:27:07,683 A kiss is still a kiss 458 00:27:07,726 --> 00:27:11,163 A sigh is just a sigh 459 00:27:13,098 --> 00:27:17,092 The fundamental things apply 460 00:27:17,136 --> 00:27:21,096 As time goes by 461 00:27:24,209 --> 00:27:26,872 And when two lovers woo 462 00:27:26,912 --> 00:27:29,677 They still say "I love you" 463 00:27:29,715 --> 00:27:32,685 On that you can rely 464 00:27:34,953 --> 00:27:40,756 The world will always welcome lovers 465 00:27:40,792 --> 00:27:46,424 As time goes by. 32238

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