Original subtitles

* MY LOVE WILL GROW FROM THE FIRST HELLO *

* UNTIL THE LAST GOODBYE

* SO TO SWEET ROMANCE THERE IS JUST ONE ANSWER *

* YOU AND I

VERY GOOD!

ALL WE NEED IS AN ELECTRIC GUITAR,

AND WE'RE ON OUR WAY.

HEY, THAT IS A GOOD 'UN.

HELEN, HERE, YOU PICK ONE.

OH, GOOBER, I'M ABOUT SUNG OUT.

OH, ME, TOO.

BEEN QUITE AN EVENING.

HEY, SAM, SAM, I FORGOT TO PAY YOU FOR THE MOVIE.

NO, NO, NO, FORGET IT.

WELL, AS LONG AS YOU PUT IT THAT WAY.

HEY...

KNOW ANY GOOD GAMES?

I THINK WE'VE HAD IT, GOOB.

AW.

I BET Y'ALL KNOW SOME GOOD GAMES.

NO, NO.

* DARLIN', YOU AND I

* KNOW THE REASON WHY

WELL...GUESS I'LL BE RUNNIN' ALONG.

I GUESS WE'D BETER BE GOIN' PRETTY SOON, TOO.

WELL, THANKS FOR THE ROOT BEER AND EVERYTHING, SAM.

OKAY, GOOB.

IF THERE'S ANYTHING GOIN' ON

TOMORROW NIGHT, OLD GOOB'S FREE.

RIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

All: GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT, GOOB.

NO.

DOESN'T GOOBER KNOW ANY GIRLS?

OH, YEAH, HE KNOWS GIRLS.

HE JUST HAS KIND OF A BAD TIME.

HE STRIKES OUT A LOT.

HE'S PRETTY SHY.

WELL, DIDN'T SOMEBODY ONCE SAY,

"FOR EVERY MAN, THERE'S A WOMAN"?

WELL, IT SEEMS LIKE, BETWEEN THE FOUR OF US,

WE COULD COME UP WITH SOMEBODY FOR HIM.

IT WOULD HAVE TO BE A...CERTAIN TYPE OF GIRL.

OH, SHE'D HAVE TO BE A CERTAIN TYPE, ALL RIGHT.

THAT'S GOOD.

VERY GOOD.

GOOD MORNING, DR. GIBSON.

GOOD MORNING, MR. FRANKLIN.

WELL, I WENT OVER THE QUESTIONNAIRE YOU PREPARED

AND I MUST SAY IT'S GENERALLY VERY SATISFACTORY.

WELL, I THINK IT'S CLOSE,

BUT IT'S GOT TO BE MORE THAN GENERALLY SATISFACTORY.

WE'VE GOT TO ENSURE ACCURATE RESULTS,

PARTICULARLY JUST STARTING IN BUSINESS.

OF COURSE. WHEN DEALING WITH A PERSON'S FUTURE

THERE CAN BE NO MARGIN FOR ERROR.

RIGHT.

I HAD A THOUGHT.

OH?

BEFORE WE START OUR STATEWIDE OPERATION

IF WE WERE TO RUN A TEST,

PUT AN AD IN A SMALL-TOWN PAPER.

I WAS JUST GOING OVER SOME NAMES HERE.

THERE'S MAYBERRY, TOAST, MANTEO...

YOU KNOW, UH, THAT'S A VERY GOOD IDEA.

YES, I'M SURE WE'D GET, UH, HALF A DOZEN ANSWERS,

AT LEAST FROM MEN.

AND WOMEN.

WELL, I'M NOT INTERESTED

IN THEM AT THE MOMENT.

SEE, I'VE BEEN THINKING.

IF I WERE TO MAKE A DATE WITH A MAN...

YOU? I DON'T KNOW

HOW A MAN'S GOING TO REACT TO A DOCTOR OF PSYCHOLOGY.

HE WOULDN'T HAVE TO KNOW.

I'D MAKE A DATE WITH A MAN WHO SEEMED THE MOST COMPATIBLE.

AND THAT WAY, I'D HAVE FIRSTHAND INFORMATION.

WE'D SOON FIND OUT WHETHER THE QUESTIONNAIRE WAS RIGHT OR NOT.

WELL, IT WOULD CERTAINLY BE A TRUE TEST.

MM-HMM.

PERFECT FOR OUR PURPOSES.

YEAH.

HEY, ANDY. OH, HI, SAM.

YOU GOT A MINUTE?

I'M JUST WAITING FOR GOOB TO COME BY WITH THE SQUAD CAR.

HE'S FIXING THE BRAKES.

OH, WELL, UH, LET'S GO INSIDE.

I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING.

HERE. OH, THANKS.

WHAT IS IT?

JUST LET ME PUT THIS DOWN.

UH, NOW, I KNOW THIS IS NONE OF OUR BUSINESS, ANDY,

BUT LOOK AT THAT AD DOWN THERE IN THE CORNER.

"SCIENTIFIC INTRODUCTIONS."

YEAH, FOR GOOBER.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

"FIND A PERFECT MATE FOR A LASTING RELATIONSHIP.

ANSWER QUESTIONNAIRE."

YEAH, AND THEN YOU JUST SEND THEM IN FIVE BUCKS.

IT'S ONE OF THOSE COMPUTER THINGS.

I'VE HEARD THEY'VE BECOME REAL POPULAR.

I UNDERSTAND THEY WORK REAL GREAT.

THEY'VE BEEN VERY SUCCESSFUL. YEAH.

THIS PLACE HERE IS IN MT. PILOT.

GOOBER HAS EXHAUSTED THE GIRLS IN MAYBERRY.

IT'LL OPEN UP THE REST OF THE COUNTY FOR HIM.

THE LINING'S STILL GOOD.

THEY JUST NEEDED TIGHTENING UP.

HEY, SAM.

HEY, GOOB, GOOB?

WE WERE JUST LOOKING AT THIS RIGHT HERE.

WHAT IS IT?

I UNDERSTAND IT WORKS REAL GOOD.

AW, YEAH.

HEY, YEAH, I'VE READ ABOUT THESE THINGS.

YOU FELLERS FIGURE ON GETTING COMPUTERIZED?

UH, IT'S NOT FOR US, GOOB.

OH, I DIDN'T THINK SO.

THESE ARE FOR FELLERS WHO CAN'T GET GALS--

YOU KNOW-- THOSE WHO AIN'T GOT NO CHARM

OR SMOOTHNESS ABOUT THEM.

I ALWAYS KIND OF FEEL SORRY FOR THEM KIND OF FELLERS.

THAT'S SOMETHING THAT'S HARD TO DEVELOP--

CHARM, HOW TO TALK TO A GIRL ON ANY SUBJECT:

CARBURETORS, SPARK PLUGS, TIRE PRESSURE.

THAT'S JUST SOMETHING YOU'RE BORN WITH.

IT'S A KNACK.

IT SURE IS.

"SCIENTIFIC INTRODUCTIONS." HMM.

UH... GOOB

YOU KNOW, I'VE ALWAYS HAD THE FEELING

THAT THESE THINGS WERE FOR EVERYBODY

WHO WOULD LIKE TO BROADEN THEIR ACQUAINTANCESHIPS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

I SUPPOSE.

I DON'T SEE WHERE IT'D FIT ANY OF US.

ANDY, YOU GOT HELEN

AND, SAM, YOU AND DARCY SEEM TO BE GETTING ALONG FINE.

RIGHT.

ME, THE ONLY REASON

I HAVEN'T BEEN SEEING JUANITA

IS SHE'S BEEN GOING OUT TO MYER'S LAKE EVERY NIGHT

PARKING WITH HAROLD FOSSETT

TO DISCUSS BUSINESS. OH?

HE'S THINKING ABOUT RENTING BOATS

AND WANTS HER OPINION.

SHE'S GOT A GREAT BUSINESS HEAD.

YEAH.

THEY'RE GIVING THIS BOAT-RENTING

A LOT OF THOUGHT...

FROM 8:00 TO 12:00 EVERY NIGHT.

GOTTA THINK A LOT ABOUT BOATS.

YEAH.

FIVE DOLLARS THEY WANT, HUH?

YEAH, WELL,

THAT'S JUST FOR PROCESSING THE QUESTIONNAIRE.

"LASTING RELATIONSHIP."

WELL, THAT'S WHAT THEY HOPE FOR.

I SUPPOSE A LOT OF GUYS

WOULD FILL OUT THIS QUESTIONNAIRE.

SURE, YEAH. COULD BE.

I MEAN, AFTER ALL, IT'S ONLY FIVE BUCKS.

I MAKE THAT MUCH FOR A MINOR TUNE-UP.

HEY, YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST THINKING.

WHAT?

I MIGHT JUST FILL THIS OUT FOR A LARK.

JUST FOR A LARK.

SURE. WHY NOT?

SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

YEAH. I'LL FILL OUT THIS QUESTIONNAIRE.

OF COURSE, I WON'T LET THEM KNOW

I GOT ALL THE GIRLS HERE I NEED.

DON'T MENTION THAT. NO, NO.

I'LL MAKE THEM THINK

I'M JUST DYING TO MEET SOMEBODY.

YEAH... I'LL SEE YOU.

YEAH. YEAH.

PAGE 33.

"SEX."

I GUESS THEY MEAN MALE.

NOW, HERE COME THE IMPORTANT ONES.

"DO YOU READ MANY BOOKS IN THE COURSE OF A MONTH?"

WONDER WHAT BOOKS THEY MEAN?

THEY DON'T SAY.

COMIC BOOKS IS BOOKS, AIN'T THEY?

YEAH, BUT I DON'T THINK...

I'VE BEEN AVERAGING ABOUT SEVEN A WEEK.

THAT MAKES ABOUT 30 A MONTH.

I'LL PUT DOWN 30... A LITTLE MORE, LITTLE LESS.

WHAT'S THE NEXT QUESTION?

"DO YOU LIKE SPORTS?"

WELL, I DON'T GUESS THERE'S A WEEK GOES BY

THAT I AIN'T IN THE BOWLING ALLEY OR POOL ROOM.

THINK THAT'S THE KIND OF SPORTS THEY MEAN?

OPE, YOU'VE GOT TO UNDERSTAND THE REASON BEHIND THE QUESTION.

THEY DON'T EXPECT ME TO PLAY FOOTBALL WITH NO GIRL.

NO, YOU SEE, GOOB...

YOU GOT TO USE THE OLD HEAD.

DO I LIKE SPORTS? YES.

WELL, WHAT'S THE NEXT ONE?

"ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SUCH THINGS

AS SCULPTURE AND PAINTING?"

SCULPTURE'S STATUES, AIN'T IT?

MOSTLY, BUT...

I DON'T KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT THAT

BUT WHEN IT COMES TO PAINTING

THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE AGAIN.

WHAT I THINK THEY MEAN, GOOB...

OPE, I KNOW WHAT THEY MEAN.

I HAPPEN TO BE OLDER THAN YOU.

SURE, GOOB.

I WANT TO MAKE SURE THESE ANSWERS ARE RIGHT

BECAUSE WHAT THEY GON' DO IS PUT THEM ON CARDS

PUNCH HOLES IN THE CARDS

AND THEN RUN THEM THROUGH THEM COMPUTER MACHINES

WITH A LOT OF OTHER CARDS...

NINE POSSIBLES, HUH?

YEAH. NOT REALLY A BROAD ENOUGH SELECTION.

ANYBODY THAT'S CLOSE ENOUGH?

THERE IS ONE HERE

THAT RELATES TO THE CARD THAT I FILED

AND WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON.

HE READS 30 BOOKS A MONTH, ENJOYS SPORTS...

YOU LIKE SPORTS, DON'T YOU?

YES.

UH, HE'S THE RIGHT AGE.

I SEE HE HAS AN INTEREST IN PAINTING

SO THERE ARE AREAS THAT WOULD INDICATE

A POSSIBLE COMPATIBILITY

THOUGH I MUST SAY SOME OF HIS ANSWERS

ARE A LITTLE INCONSISTENT.

WELL, FOR THE MOMENT, DR. GIBSON

WE'VE GOT TO TRUST THE QUESTIONNAIRE AND MACHINE.

SO LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

WELL, I'LL GET A LETTER OFF TO HIM.

HEY, HEY, GUESS WHAT I'VE GOT!

WHOO! GUESS! WHAT

A LETTER FROM THAT SCIENTIFIC PLACE--

THE THING I SENT IN FOR A LARK?

WHAT'S IT SAY?

THEY RUN MY CARD THROUGH THEM MACHINES

AND THEY HAVE COME UP WITH A LADY WHO'S GONNA BE...

"COMPATIBLE." COMPATIBLE.

OH, HEY, THAT'S EXCITING.

I NEVER MET A LADY

THAT COME FROM A MACHINE BEFORE.

WHAT HAPPENS NOW?

THEY SENT ME HER NAME AND PHONE NUMBER

AND I GUESS I'M SUPPOSED TO CALL AND MAKE A DATE.

SHE LIVES IN MT. PILOT.

YOU KNOW THEM CITY GALS CAN GET REAL FRISKY.

ANDY, CAN I USE YOUR PHONE?

YEAH, YEAH.

I'M ANXIOUS TO HEAR WHAT SHE SOUNDS LIKE.

HELLO, SARAH?

I WANT TO CALL MT. PILOT, 4872.

WELL, IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!

ALWAYS WANTING TO KNOW WHO YOU'RE CALLING.

GOT TO HAVE SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT

IN THE BEAUTY PARLOR. GREAT SPY NETWORK.

HELLO?

I'D LIKE TO SPEAK TO... EDITH GIBSON, PLEASE.

OH, MISS GIBSON!

THIS IS GOOBER PYLE.

WELL, IT'S A PLEASURE TO TALK TO YOU, TOO.

She's got a nice voice. GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.

I EXPECT THE FIRST THING WE OUGHT TO DO

IS MAKE A DATE.

She wants to know when.

TONIGHT! TAKE HER OUT TO DINNER.

TONIGHT. TAKE YOU OUT TO DINNER?

YOU WILL?

WELL, UH, UH, YOU'RE IN MT. PILOT.

HAVE YOU GOT YOUR OWN CAR?

WELL, THERE'S A PLACE CALLED MORELLI'S.

IT'S ABOUT HALFWAY IN BETWEEN.

WELL, YOU CAN'T MISS IT.

WELL, THEY GOT GOOD FOOD AND DANCING

AND THEY'VE NEVER BEEN RAIDED.

SHE SAYS I GOT A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR

And I wasn't even trying!

GO AHEAD, TALK. TALK.

WELL, YEAH!

7:00 WILL BE FINE.

I'LL GET THERE FIRST AND GET A TABLE

AND THE WAITER WILL TELL YOU WHERE I'M SITTING.

WELL, GOOD.

YEAH, I'LL SEE YOU.

ALL SET.

GOOD.

HELLO?

WELL, NEVER MIND WHO SHE IS!

THAT SARAH.

WELL... LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE IN FOR A BIG NIGHT.

YEAH.

ANDY, YOU KNOW THAT SUIT I BORROWED

WHEN WE WAS IN RALEIGH?

THAT TIME YOU TORE THE SLEEVE?

I WONDER IF YOU COULD LOAN ME THAT?

A FEW PEOPLE SEEN ME AND SAID I LOOKED GREAT.

YOU GOT IT.

I OUGHT TO WEAR

MY WHITE SHIRT WITH THAT SUIT.

I AIN'T GOT ANY CUFFLINKS.

I GOT A PAIR, GOOB.

HEY, THANKS, SAM. BOY, HOWDY.

I THINK I'LL GET A HAIRCUT, TOO.

MIGHT EVEN USE THAT NEW BARBER IN TOWN.

WANNA LOOK RIGHT.

I WOULDN'T WANT THAT LADY

THINKING SHE WASN'T GETTING

HER FULL FIVE DOLLARS' WORTH FROM THAT MACHINE.

SAY, PA, THEY'RE HAVING A SALE

AT WEAVER'S ON THEIR TURTLENECK SHIRTS.

THEY'RE REGULARLY $2.50 AND NOW THEY'RE $1.85.

OH...

WHAT DO YOU SAY, PA?

WELL...

MAKE SURE IT FITS.

THANKS, PA.

HEY, PA, LOOK.

HEY, ANDY. HEY, OPIE.

WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR, GOOB?

THAT NEW BARBER IN TOWN'S ONE OF THEM HAIRSTYLISTS.

HE SAYS EVERYBODY OUGHT TO HAVE

THEIR OWN PERSONAL HAIRSTYLE.

OH.

DID HE DESIGN THAT ONE JUST FOR YOU?

YEAH. IT SUITS THE CONTOUR OF MY FACE.

OH.

WHAT'S A THING LIKE THAT GO FOR, GOOB?

SIX DOLLARS, BUT THAT INCLUDES A CAN OF HAIR SPRAY.

DID YOU HAVE TO GO UNDER A DRYER?

WELL, HE DON'T MAKE YOU

GO UNDER THERE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO.

I DON'T RECKON I WAS UNDER THERE

NO MORE THAN A MINUTE.

WELL, IT REALLY LOOKS GOOD, GOOB.

YOU MEAN THAT, ANDY?

YEAH. IT'S YOU.

GOOD.

WELL, I GOT TO GET BACK TO THE STATION.

THANKS FOR THE SUIT.

YEAH.

HAIR SPRAY?

WELL, OPIE, IF A MAN SPENDS SIX DOLLARS

FOR A HAIRCUT

HE'S GOT A RIGHT TO DO ANYTHING

HE WANTS TO WITH IT.

I GUESS SO.

SEE YOU, PA.

MM.

GOOB?

GOOB?

Come in, Sam.

HEY, SAM.

UH, HI, GOOB.

I DIDN'T WANT TO GO OUTSIDE TILL THIS THING DRIES.

I PUT SOME SPRAY ON IT.

OH.

I GOT A SPECIAL HAIRCUT.

CAN YOU TELL?

WELL, NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT

I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT YOU.

I JUST COULDN'T PUT MY FINGER ON IT.

I'D SHOW IT TO YOU

BUT I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO TAKE THE NET OFF

TILL THE SPRAY HARDENS.

WELL, I'LL SEE IT SOME OTHER TIME.

UH, HERE ARE THE CUFFLINKS, GOOB.

OH, THANKS.

SAM?

YEAH?

YOU KNOW, I CAN TALK REAL GOOD TO A GIRL

AFTER I KNOW HER A LITTLE WHILE

BUT IT'S WHEN I FIRST MEET 'EM--

THOSE FIRST MINUTES THAT I HAVE A LITTLE TROUBLE.

YOU'LL DO JUST FINE.

I WAS JUST WONDERING--

I KNOW IT'S A LOT TO ASK, BUT I WAS JUST WONDERING

IF MAYBE YOU AND ANDY COULD DROP BY MORELLI'S TONIGHT

AND MAKE BELIEVE WE SORT OF MET BY ACCIDENT.

KIND OF WALK BY THE TABLE LIKE IT WASN'T PLANNED

AND SIT DOWN A WHILE TILL I GOT THINGS UNDER CONTROL.

YOU DON'T WANT ANYBODY THERE.

PLEASE?

YOU REALLY WANT US THERE?

I SURE WOULD APPRECIATE IT.

WELL, I'LL CHECK WITH ANDY.

THANKS.

NOT YET, SORRY.

WELL, I'LL, I'LL SEE YOU.

I'M GOOBER PYLE.

THESE ARE FOR YOU.

HEY!

NO OFFENSE...

HE'S RIGHT OVER THERE.

THANK YOU.

MR. PYLE?

HUH?

THE WAITER SAID THAT YOU WERE MR. PYLE.

HE DID?

OH, WELL, HE WAS RIGHT.

THAT'S WHO I AM, ALL RIGHT.

HELLO. I'M EDITH GIBSON.

I'M GOOBER PYLE.

YES, I KNOW.

I JUST THOUGHT I'D MAKE IT OFFICIAL.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIT DOWN?

THANK YOU.

OH, HOW VERY NICE.

THANK YOU.

I'M SORRY I WAS A LITTLE LATE.

WELL, THAT'S OKAY.

I'M LATE SOMETIMES MYSELF.

HAIRCUT.

OH.

IT'S VERY BECOMING.

UM, I'VE NEVER BEEN HERE.

IT'S VERY NICE.

YEAH, IT SURE IS.

WELL, HI, GOOB!

WELL, ANDY, SAM.

WELL, WHAT ARE Y'ALL DOING HERE?

OH, WE'RE JUST OUT ON THE TOWN, SORT OF.

MISS GIBSON, I'D LIKE YOU TO MEET ANDY TAYLOR.

MISS GIBSON. HELLO.

AND SAM JONES.

HOW DO YOU DO?

HOW DO YOU DO?

WHY DON'T Y'ALL SIT DOWN FOR A MINUTE?

WE DON'T WANT TO INTERRUPT ANYTHING.

NO, JUST SIT ON DOWN.

WELL, IF YOU'RE SURE.

YEAH.

OKAY.

NICE WEATHER.

YES, IT IS.

Sam: WE DON'T USUALLY GET MUCH RAIN

THIS TIME OF THE YEAR.

NO.

RIGHT.

DO YOU KNOW I WAS SIMPLY AMAZED

AT THE NUMBER OF BOOKS MR. PYLE READS?

GOOBER.

EDITH.

AT ANY RATE, MY GOODNESS, 30 BOOKS A MONTH.

WELL, IT TOOK ME THREE WEEKS TO GET THROUGH

THE RISE AND FALL OF THE ROMAN EMPIRE.

THE RISE AND FALL OF WHAT EMPIRE?

THE ROMAN EMPIRE.

THREE WEEKS, HUH?

YES. IT'S A BIG, THICK BOOK.

WELL, I GUESS THE REASON I HADN'T READ IT

IS BECAUSE I BEEN READING MOSTLY THIN BOOKS LATELY.

THIN BOOKS? YEAH, YOU SEE...

I GUESS YOU FEEL

YOU READ A LOT MORE BOOKS THAT WAY.

YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I MEAN.

WELL, EACH TO HIS OWN TASTE, I GUESS.

AS I UNDERSTAND IT

YOU HAVE QUITE AN INTEREST IN PAINTING, TOO.

I'M REALLY NOT THAT GREAT.

HE'S JUST BEING MODEST.

I'D LOVE TO SEE SOME OF YOUR WORK.

WELL, NOTHING MUCH TO SEE.

A RED BARN'S A RED BARN.

I PAINTED SAM'S LAST SUMMER.

OH.

I ASSUMED THAT YOU...

YOU MEAN, PAINTINGS THAT HANG ON THE WALL?

NO, MA'AM.

DINNER FOR FOUR?

UH, JUST TWO.

WE'D BETTER BE LEAVING.

WE'LL RUN ON.

NICE TO HAVE MET YOU.

NICE TO HAVE MET YOU, TOO.

GOODBYE.

BYE-BYE.

BYE.

THE POUNDED STEAK DINNERS ARE NICE.

THEY POUND 'EM RIGHT HERE ON THE PREMISES.

THAT'S NICE.

TWO POUNDED STEAKS.

I GUESS WE SHOULD HAVE HELPED HIM

FILL OUT THAT QUESTIONNAIRE.

YEAH.

I GUESS THAT COMPUTER DIDN'T DO SUCH A GOOD JOB IN OUR CASE.

WELL, IT'S JUST A MACHINE.

PROBABLY HAD A BAD TUBE.

YOU WANT TO STAY AND EAT THE DINNER?

YES.

NOW THAT THE PRESSURE'S OFF, WE CAN JUST RELAX.

THE FUNNY THING ABOUT IT

THESE FERNS GREW ONLY IN THAT ONE SPOT

ON THE SIDE OF THAT HILL.

REALLY?

YEAH. THE MOST BEAUTIFUL FERNS YOU EVER SAW.

AND NOBODY HAD SEEN THEM

IN ANY PART OF NORTH CAROLINA.

HOW THEY GOT THERE NOBODY HAS EVER FIGURED OUT.

THAT MUST HAVE BEEN SOMETHING TO SEE.

YEAH, IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL SIGHT.

FIRST TIME I SAW 'EM IS WHEN I WAS A BOY

KNOCKING ABOUT IN THEM HILLS.

YOU WANT MORE WINE OR COFFEE?

OH, NO, THANK YOU.

I GUESS I BETTER BE GOING.

OH.

EDITH...

I KNOW I'M NOT WHAT YOU EXPECTED

BUT, WELL, I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY

I HAD A GOOD TIME.

WELL, I'M NOT WHAT YOU EXPECTED, EITHER.

OH, YES, YOU ARE.

I WAS HOPING FOR A NICE PERSON.

YOU'VE BEEN ALL OF THAT.

THAT'S VERY SWEET.

I KNOW YOU'LL FIND THE RIGHT GIRL

ONE OF THESE DAYS...

PROBABLY RIGHT IN YOUR OWN BACKYARD.

WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS

BIRDS OF A FEATHER OUGHT TO BE STICKING TOGETHER?

ARISTOTLE SAID THAT, NOT I.

WELL, GOODBYE, GOOBER.

BYE, EDITH.

EVERYTHING SATISFACTORY, SIR?

ABOUT AS WELL AS COULD BE EXPECTED.

OH, YOU'RE CHANGING THAT ONE, TOO?

MM-HMM.

WHY?

BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE

THAT PEOPLE ARE NECESSARILY PERFECT MATCHES

BECAUSE THEY HAPPEN TO BE LEFT-HANDED.

OR RIGHT-HANDED

OR EVEN HAVE THE SAME TASTE IN YOGURT.

BUT A LASTING RELATIONSHIP

IS BASED ON COMMON INTERESTS.

YES.

YES, BUT MAYBE THERE'LL BE SOME WOMEN

WHO AREN'T THINKING IN TERMS OF COMMON INTERESTS

OR LASTING RELATIONSHIPS.

MAYBE THERE ARE SOME WOMEN WHO HAVE DEVOTED

TOO MUCH TIME TO THEIR CAREERS...

WHO DON'T EXACTLY REQUIRE AN EXACT REPLICA OF THEMSELVES.

JUST SOMEBODY WHO'S PLEASANT...

GENTLE...

A NICE PERSON.

HI, GOOB.

OH, HEY, OPE.

BOY, IT SURE IS NICE TO SEE YOUR OLD HAIRDO BACK.

THANKS.

I BROUGHT YOU OVER THESE COMIC BOOKS.

I'M THROUGH WITH THEM.

NO, THANKS.

ARISTOTLE?

UH-HUH.

OH. WELL, SEE YOU.

SEE YOU.

* AND MY LOVE WILL GROW FROM THE FIRST HELLO *

* UNTIL THE LAST GOODBYE

* SO TO SWEET ROMANCE THERE IS JUST ONE ANSWER *

* YOU AND I *

WELL, WE SURE HAD FUN LAST NIGHT, HUH?

YEAH, I FOUND OUT A LOT OF THINGS

ABOUT EDITH I DIDN'T KNOW BEFORE.

OH

WELL, FIRST OF ALL, SHE WORKS

FOR THAT SCIENTIFIC INTRODUCTIONS PLACE.

THEY'RE JUST STARTING UP, AND THEY WANTED TO MAKE SURE

THAT THEY GOT THE QUESTIONS RIGHT,

AND THIS WAS KIND OF A TEST.

SHE'S A DOCTOR OF PSYCHOLOGY.

WOW! I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING SPECIAL ABOUT HER.

YOU GONNA SEE HER AGAIN?

MAYBE. SHE CERTAINLY SEEMED TO LIKE ME

WHEN I TOOK HER HOME LAST NIGHT.

WHAT HAPPENED? OH...

OH, COME ON, COME ON, TELL US.

WELL, THAT'S THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE

I EVER KISSED A DOCTOR.