Original subtitles

STARRING ANDY GRIFFITH...

WITH RONNY HOWARD.

ALSO STARRING DON KNOTTS.

ALL RIGHT, BOYS, COME ON. LET'S GET OUT.

COME ON, COME ON. ALL RIGHT, COME ON. OUT.

YOU GOT PRISONERS?

YEAH. I GOT FOUR.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAND?

OH, I HAD A LITTLE TROUBLE BRINGING THESE BIRDS IN.

WE ALL STOPPED OVER AT DOC ZACK'S AND HE FIXED US UP.

OH, I WISH I COULD'VE BEEN THERE.

I WISH I'D A-HAD A CRACK AT THESE BABIES.

EASY NOW, BARNEY.

EVERYTHING'S UNDER CONTROL.

GET 'EM IN THERE, CHIEF.

ALL RIGHT. COME ON. COME ON. GET IN THERE.

ALL RIGHT. BREAK IT UP. THE SHOW'S OVER!

KIDS ALWAYS HANGING AROUND.

GREAT WORK, CHIEF.

WHO ARE THEY? WHAT'D YOU GET 'EM ON?

502 308?

WANT ME TO SEND OUT AN A.P.B.?

ALL POINTS BULLETIN, BARNEY?

THEY'RE ALREADY HERE.

THEY'RE CAPTURED.

UNLOCK THE OTHERS.

WELL, COME ON, CHIEF, GIVE. WHAT'S THE SCOOP?

WELL, BARNEY, THESE HERE ARE THE GORDON BOYS.

THEY'RE THE OWNERS AND PROPRIETORS OF THAT STILL

WE'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR UP AT FRANKLIN HOLLER.

FRANKLIN HOLLER?

WELL, THE OLD FRANKLIN HOLLER STILL, HUH?

WELL, YOU GUYS OUGHT TO KNOW

WE'D CATCH UP TO YOU SOONER OR LATER.

LOCK 'EM UP, BARN.

YEAH. COME ON. MOVE. GET IN THERE.

MOVE. YOU TWO IN THERE.

COME ON, COME ON.

NOW, IN CASE YOU BIRDS GET ANY IDEAS

ABOUT BREAKING OUT OF HERE,

I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING YOU OUGHT TO KNOW.

THIS IS A MAXIMUM SECURITY PRISON.

UH, HEY, BARN?

MAYBE WE OUGHT TO MAKE IT

A LITTLE MORE MAXIMUM BY MOVING THE KEY.

MOVING THE KEY.

I WAS JUST, UH, JUST GONNA DO THAT.

WELL, I WAS.

SURE IS GOOD TO BE DOING

A CAPACITY BUSINESS, HUH, SHERIFF?

BOTH THESE BABIES FILLED UP.

WELL, I'LL TELL YOU THE TRUTH,

I'D AS SOON SEE THEM CELLS EMPTY.

THAT WAY WE KNOW LAW AND ORDER'S BEING OBSERVED.

WELL, YEAH. I SUPPOSE YOU CAN LOOK AT IT THAT WAY.

OH, OTIS IS ON ANOTHER TOOT.

HEY, WHO'S IN MY ROOM?

BARNEY, I DEMAND TO HAVE THE ROOM I'M ACCUSTOMED TO.

YOU'LL GET ALONG FINE WITH THESE BOYS.

YOU'VE BEEN BUYING MOON FROM THEM FOR YEARS.

SO?

JUST WAIT RIGHT THERE. I'LL GET THE KEY.

THIS IS MY ROOM. OUT!

DON'T YOU TALK TO US, YOU DIRTY DOUBLE CROSSER!

WHAT?! YOU STOOL PIGEON!

YOU'RE THE ONE THAT PUT THE FINGER ON US, AIN'T YA?

OH, WHY WOULD I DO THAT?

WHY? BECAUSE YOU'RE PALSY WITH THE SHERIFF HERE.

YOU BEEN OUT TO GET US EVER SINCE WE RAISED OUR PRICES!

THAT IS A FALSEHOOD.

THEN WHY HAVEN'T YOU BEEN BUYING MOON FROM US?!

WELL, IT AIN'T BECAUSE YOU RAISED THE PRICE.

IT'S 'CAUSE YOU LOWERED THE QUALITY.

JUST DOESN'T HAVE THE ZI IT USED TO HAVE,

AND BESIDES, I FOUND SOMEBODY WHO DELIVERS.

WELL, I'M SORRY YOU WON'T HAVE ANY PRIVACY, OTIS,

BUT I DON'T RECKON IT'LL HURT YOU THIS ONCE.

SHERIFF, PUT HIM IN MY CELL, PLEASE!

OH, NO. I WANT HIM OVER HERE WITH ME!

HOLD IT! HOLD IT!

LISTEN TO THE SHERIFF!

BARNEY, HE AIN'T GONNA PUT ME IN THERE, IS HE?

BARNEY, I'M AFRAID WE CAN'T PUT OTIS IN THE SAME JAIL WITH THEM.

WELL, ANDY, IT'S THE ONLY JAIL WE GOT.

COULDN'T WE DOUBLE 'EM UP

AND PUT THE GORDON BOYS IN THAT CELL

AND

NO, I DON'T THINK THAT'D WORK OUT.

THERE'S JUST THE ONE BED AND THERE AIN'T ENOUGH PALLET SPACE.

WE'LL STAND UP.

WELL, HE CAN HAVE MY BED, SHERIFF.

HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT!

SHH.

LISTEN TO THE SHERIFF.

MUCH OBLIGED, OTIS.

NO, I'M AFRAID WE CAN'T KEEP 'EM ALL HERE TOGETHER.

IT'D JUST BE ONE RUCKUS AFTER ANOTHER

THE WHOLE TIME.

ONE RUCKUS AFTER ANOTHER.

OH, OTIS.

ALL RIGHT, BOYS.

TURN HIM LOOSE.

TURN HIM LOOSE. TURN HIM LOOSE NOW.

WHEW!

ALL HE WANTS TO DO IS TRY

TO SLEEP IT OFF AND SOBER UP.

WELL, I'VE GOT ONE SOLUTION.

YEAH. WHAT'S THAT?

I'LL TAKE HIM HOME WITH ME

AND HE CAN SERVE HIS TIME THERE.

ANDY, HAVE A PRISONER IN YOUR HOUSE?

WHAT'S WRONG?

WELL, HE'S A PRISONER, NOT A GUEST.

WELL, YOU GOT ANY BETTER IDEAS?

WELL... NO.

IN THAT CASE, COME ON, OTIS.

OH, YOU'RE GONNA TAKE ME HOME WITH YOU?

THAT'S RIGHT.

GOODY. THIS OUGHT TO BE FUN.

THAT'S IT.

MAKE A SHAM OF THE WHOLE THING.

UNDERMINE THE WHOLE PEANUT JUST TO...

WELL, AT LEAST I CAN STAY HERE AND RUN THIS PRISON

THE WAY A PRISON OUGHT TO BE RUN!

WATCH OUT!

NOW, LOOK ALIVE!

SNAP TO!

THIS IS A JAIL!

OH, CLARA, THESE ARE BEAUTIFUL.

HOW MANY MORE DO WE HAVE TO MAKE, BEE?

14 WEREN'T ENOUGH LAST YEAR.

THEN LET'S EACH MAKE SIX,

AND WE'LL BE RESPONSIBLE FOR 18.

OKAY.

* THE DIPSY DOODLE WILL GET IN YOUR HAIR *

* THE COW'S JUMPING OVER THE DIPSY DOODLE *

* THAT'S THE WAY...

ALL RIGHT, OTIS, COME ON.

COME ON, COME ON.

* THE DIPSY DOODLE

ALL RIGHT, NOW, OTIS, OTIS, BE QUIET.

SHH. SHH.

NO MORE DIPSY DOODLE.

OKAY, COME ON. * NO MORE DIPSY DOODLE

COME ON, SHH. SHH.

Aunt Bee: LET'S DO THAT, SUCH A GOOD IDEA.

LOOKS LIKE AUNT BEE'S GOT SOME COMPANY.

SHH! COME ON, WE'LL GO IN THE FRONT WAY.

* THE DIPSY DOODLE, WE'LL GO IN THE FRONT *

SHH! SHH!

* THE DIPSY DOODLE...

COME ON. COME ON.

* THE DIPSY DOODLE...

COME ON. * THE DIPSY DOODLE IS...

* AND I LOVE YOU AND YOU LOVE... *

I KNOW, I KNOW.

SHH, SHH.

ANDY, SHH.

THAT'S RIGHT. SHH.

ANDY, I...

OTIS CAMPBELL?

WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?

ANDY, WHAT'S HAPPENED TO YOUR HAND?

OH, I HAD A LITTLE RUCKUS

WITH A COUPLE OF PRISONERS.

IT WOULD BE MY PLEASURE, DEAR LADY,

TO BE INCARCERATED IN YOUR DOMICILE.

OH, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

IT MEANS YOU'RE CRAZY ALL THE THINGS THAT...

SHH! THE LADIES ARE IN THE KITCHEN.

OH, SHALL WE JOIN THE LADIES IN THE KITCHEN?

OH, ANDY, WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT?

I GOT A LITTLE PROBLEM DOWN AT THE JAIL, AUNT BEE.

I'VE RUN OUT OF SPACE AND I HAD NOWHERE TO PUT OTIS

AND I HAD TO BRING HIM HOME WITH ME.

OH, WELL, THIS IS RIDICULOUS, BRINGING HOME A PRISONER!

I'M NOT GOING TO PUT UP WITH THIS, ANDY.

WELL, HEY, AUNT BEE, I'VE GOT NO OTHER CHOICE.

OTIS, GIVE ME THAT!

I'M THIRSTY, ANDY!

LATER, LATER. GIVE IT HERE.

I'LL JUST PUT HIM UP IN THE GUEST ROOM,

AND WHEN HIS 24 HOURS IS UP,

I'LL SEND HIM ON HOME.

OF ALL NIGHTS, WHEN WE'RE BAKING THE CAKES FOR THE CHURCH SOCIAL.

* THE DIPSY DOODLE IS A THING TO BE LOVED *

OTIS, OTIS, DRINK, DRINK, DRINK. DRINK.

I'LL JUST TAKE HIM UPSTAIRS.

COME ON, OTIS.

WE'LL GET SETTLED. COME ON.

Clara: BEE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

HUH?

OH. OH, I'M COMING, CLARA.

* THAT'S THE WAY YOU DIPSY DOODLE... *

ALL RIGHT, OTIS. COME RIGHT OVER HERE.

STAND RIGHT THERE.

COME HERE, COME HERE, COME HERE.

GIVE ME THAT.

GIVE ME YOUR ARM.

COME ON. GIVE ME...

PULL!

GIVE ME THAT.

NO, NO, NO. THAT'S MY WATER.

ALL RIGHT. GIVE ME YOUR OTHER ARM.

PULL!

TURN AROUND.

LET'S GET YOUR TIE.

NOW, SIT DOWN, OTIS.

SIT DOWN. I WANT TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

NOW LISTEN. I WANT YOU TO SETTLE DOWN AND BE QUIET.

NO MORE SINGING.

I WANT YOU TO GO TO SLEEP, YOU UNDERSTAND?

SHH.

SHH.

OTIS!

WELL, HERE'S THE COCONUT ONE.

I THINK WE OUGHT TO DECORATE IT WITH JELLY BEANS.

WHY DO YOU KEEP LOOKING OUT THERE, BEE?

HMM? OH, NOTHING, NOTHING.

NOW, WE NEED THE COCONUT, DON'T WE?

WE'VE GOT THE COCONUT.

THAT'S WHAT I JUST SAID.

OH, GOOD.

OH, EVENING, LADIES.

HI, ANDY. HELLO, ANDY.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAND?

OH, NOTHING. JUST A TUSSLE

WITH A COUPLE OF PRISONERS.

DON'T THEY LOOK GOOD! MMM!

THAT'S FOR THE CAKE.

MARY, WHERE'S THAT SPONGE?

IT'S OVER THERE ON THE SINK.

* SO PLAY THE DIPSY DOODLE...

HOW IS OUR PRISONER?

HE'S FINE.

HE'S IN BED ASLEEP.

OH, ANDY, STOP. YOU'RE EATING ALL THE BLACK ONES.

WELL, I LIKE 'EM, AUNT BEE.

Otis: * THE DIPSY DOODLE COMES OUT IN REVERSE *

* LIKE YOU LOVE ME AND I LOVE ME *

* THAT'S THE WAY THE DIPSY DOODLE WORKS *

I CAME TO FILL MY VASE.

NOW, AUNT BEE,

DON'T ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BLACK SIDE.

ONCE OTIS HAS SLEPT IT OFF, HE'LL BE NO TROUBLE AT ALL.

WHY, DOWN AT THE JAIL,

HE'S JUST LIKE ONE OF THE FAMILY.

BUT THIS ISN'T THE JAIL.

THIS IS OUR HOME, AND I WANT HIM OUT OF HERE.

I'LL GET HIM OUT.

I JUST GOT TO GO DOWN TO THE OFFICE

AND TEND TO A FEW THINGS

AND SOON AS I FINISH, I'LL GET HIM OUTTA HERE.

WELL, IN THE MEANTIME,

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH HIM?

WELL, NOTHIN'.

HE-HE'S A PRISONER.

OH, UH...

I EXPECT HE'S ABOUT READY FOR BREAKFAST.

BARNEY USUALLY FIXES HIM

TWO SOFT-BOILED EGGS, FOUR MINUTES,

ONE PIECE OF TOAST, AND COFFEE,

BLACK, WITH ONE SUGAR.

OH, UH...

I EXPECT IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE OUTTA ORDER,

BUT, UH, YOU RECKON IT'D BE ALL RIGHT

IF I WAS TO KISS THE WARDEN GOOD

ALL RIGHT, MEN.

MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE?

MEN, INASMUCH AS I AM

THE REIGNING OFFICER IN CHARGE HERE,

I FEEL IT WOULD NOT BE WRONG FOR ME TO START YOU

ON A PROGRAM OF REHABILITATION.

WHAT DO I MEAN BY REHABILITATION?

I MEAN ANY CONSTRUCTIVE ACTIVITY

WHICH WOULD BRING OUT THE TALENTS YOU MAY HAVE.

NOW, WHO KNOWS

THAT HAD YOUR TWIGS BEEN BENT IN ANOTHER DIRECTION,

YOU, IKE

MAY HAVE BEEN A GREAT VIOLINIST.

YOU, BILLY,

A GREAT ARCHITECT.

SHERMAN,

A DENTIST.

JUNIOR,

A DANCER.

WELL, IT'S NEVER TOO LATE.

NOW, I HAVE HERE A WOODCARVING SET,

A LEATHER CRAFT SET,

A METAL CRAFT SET,

AND A MR. POTATO SET.

NOW, WHO WANTS WHAT?

NOW, IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE TO ME WHICH ONE YOU TAKE.

WELL, COME ON, COME ON. SPEAK UP.

WHICH ONE DO YOU WANT?

I'LL TAKE THE MR. POTATO SET.

GOOD, GOOD.

THERE YOU ARE.

WOODCARVING FOR YOU.

THERE YOU ARE.

LEATHER CRAFT FOR YOU,

AND METAL CRAFT FOR YOU.

OTIS?

OTIS CAMPBELL?

BREAKFAST.

HMM WHAT IS IT?

I'VE GOT YOUR BREAKFAST.

OH.

I BELIEVE I'LL SLEEP A LITTLE LONGER, AUNT BEE.

KEEP MY BREAKFAST HOT AND THE COFFEE SIMMERING.

OTIS CAMPBELL, YOU TAKE YOUR BREAKFAST NOW

OR YOU WON'T GET IT AT ALL.

DO YOU HEAR?

NOW JUST A MINUTE.

I GOT MY RIGHTS.

I'M A PRISONER IN THIS HOUSE,

AND I EXPECT TO BE TREATED LIKE ONE.

OTIS?

OTIS?

OTIS? HMM?

WHAT WAS THAT YOU SAID ABOUT BEING A PRISONER?

OH, I SAID, "I'M A PRISONER IN THIS HOUSE

AND I EXPECT TO BE TREATED LIKE ONE."

WELL, IF YOU'RE A PRISONER, I'M RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU,

AND THAT MAKES ME THE WARDEN.

OH, AUNT BEE, DON'T HOLLER SO MUCH, PLEASE.

I GOT A HEAD THAT FEELS LIKE

IT WAS IN A DRAWER ALL NIGHT.

NOW, WILL YOU GO AWAY?

GET UP, PRISONER, AND GET TO WORK.

WORK?

THAT'S RIGHT,

AND YOU CAN START WITH YOUR ROOM.

CLEAN IT UP!

CLEAN...? OH!

ANDY! WHERE'S ANDY?

I'M A PRISONER!

CLEAN IT UP!

OTIS, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

ANDY, YOU GOTTA GET ME OUTTA THIS.

SHE'S ABOUT TO WORK ME TO DEATH.

AUNT BEE?

AUNT BEE?

BLOODY MARY.

ANDY, GET ME OUTTA HERE.

LOOK, I AIN'T NEVER WORKED SO HARD IN MY LIFE.

OH, I GOT A HANGOVER AND EVERYTHING.

SHE'S A BEAST.

SHE'S A REAL BEAST.

ANDY, LOOK, CAN I GO?

WELL, OTIS, YOUR TIME AIN'T UP.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, TAKE YOU BACK TO JAIL?

YEAH. TAKE ME BACK TO JAIL.

WITH THE GORDON BROTHERS?

THEY'D KILL YOU.

OH, NO, NO.

NO, NOT THAT. NO.

WELL, IT'S EITHER THE GORDON BROTHERS OR THIS.

OH...WHAT A MESS I MADE OF MY LIFE.

THERE'S ONLY ONE THING TO DO --

CRACK OUT.

THAT'S WHAT I'LL DO. I'LL RUN AWAY.

DID YOU FILL THE WOODBOX?

NO.

GET TO IT.

HEY. PSST!

HEY.

COME HERE. COME HERE.

NO, NO. BRING THE LADDER.

THE LADDER.

DID YOU VACUUM THE HALL?

NO.

GET TO IT.

ARE YOU SURE YOU'LL HAVE THAT BY WEDNESDAY?

YES, MA'AM. YOU'RE SURE?

I PROMISE.

GOOD. BYE-BYE.

BYE-BYE, AUNT BEE.

OTIS, WHEN YOU GET FINI--

OTIS?

OTIS?

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!

JUST A MINUTE. JUST A MINUTE.

OPEN THOSE DOORS.

Otis: OW! OW! OW!

I...

I GIVE UP.

DID YOU FINISH THOSE DISHES?

NO.

GET TO IT.

HI, AUNT BEE.

HI, ANDY.

SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG.

I HAD TO SERVE SOME PAPERS OUT ON THE POST ROAD.

TOOK A LITTLE WHILE. HMM?

HOW'S THE PRISONER?

FINE.

I HOPE YOU DIDN'T WORK HIM TOO HARD.

OH, I DON'T THINK SO.

WELL, HIS TIME'S ABOUT UP.

I MIGHT AS WELL LET HIM GO.

HEY, OTIS?

OTIS?

IS THAT YOU, OTIS?

SHE MADE ME DO IT.

WELL, I'LL BE DOGGED.

OTIS, TELL HIM THE NEWS.

THE NEWS?

OTIS...

TELL HIM.

I AIN'T GONNA GET DRUNK NO MORE.

AUNT BEE PUT ME ON PROBATION.

IF I MAKE ONE MORE FALSE MOVE, I GOTTA COME BACK.

AUNT BEE, I BELIEVE YOU MISSED YOUR CALLING.

YOU OUGHT TO HAVE BEEN A WARDEN.

GETTIN' OTIS TO WALK THE STRAIGHT

AND NARROW AIN'T NO SMALL ACCOMPLISHMENT.

ANDY, CAN WE GO NOW?

I DON'T EVER WANNA SEE THE ROCK AGAIN.

THE ROCK?

OH, THAT'S WHAT OTIS

CALLS MY LITTLE JAIL HERE.

OH.

WELL, DON'T BE BITTER, OTIS.

DON'T BE BITTER.

I'LL DRIVE YA HOME.

BELIEVE I'LL STOP BY AT THE OFFICE

AND SHOW HIM OFF, THOUGH--

SHOW BARNEY THERE'S MORE THAN ONE WAY TO REHABILITATE.

COME ON.

FREEDOM...

OH, IT SMELLS GOOD.

Barney: HEY, ANDY!

OH, HI, BARN.

OTIS?

AIN'T HE SOMETHIN', ALL CLEAN AND SCRUBBED?

AND YOU KNOW SOMETHIN' ELSE?

HE AIN'T GONNA DRINK ANYMORE.

WHAT?

LOOKS LIKE OUR LITTLE JAIL ANNEX HERE

DID A PRETTY GOOD JOB OF REHABILITATIN', DON'T IT?

HOW'S, UH, HOW'S THINGS WITH YOUR PRISONERS?

UH...

UH, ANDY, CAN I TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?

WELL, SURE. GO AHEAD.

WELL, I MEAN, UH, PRIVATELY.

OH, UH, OTIS, W-WOULD YOU MIND WAITIN' IN THE CAR?

OKAY, ANDY. YEAH.

WHAT IS IT, BARN? SOMETHIN' WRONG?

Y-YEAH, YEAH.

WITH THE PRISONERS?

YEAH.

WELL, WHAT IS IT?

WELL, UH...

THEY ESCAPED.

ESCAPED?!

WELL, HOW'D THEY ESCAPE?

WELL, YOU KNOW THAT METAL CRAFT SET I GAVE TO ONE OF 'EM?

YEAH.

DARN GUY WENT AND MADE A PASS KEY.

ALL RIGHT, OUT, BOYS, COME ON.

LET'S GO. COME ON, ALL RIGHT.

COME ON! MOVE! LET'S GO!

WHAT ARE WE STOPPIN' HERE FOR?

AIN'T THIS YOUR HOUSE, SHERIFF?

THAT'S RIGHT -- WE FIGURED THIS WOULD BE

A BETTER PLACE TO REHABILITATE YOU.

OH, NO, WE HEARD ABOUT THIS PLACE.

IT'S THE ROCK!

HEY!

COME ON, COME ON.

COME ON! COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.

COME ON, COME ON, COME ON!

COME. ANDY, WAIT A MINUTE.

Aunt Bee: HELLO, BOYS.

I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU.

BLOODY MARY! GET IN THERE.

COME ON, IN, GET IN.

WE DON'T WANT TO!

COME ON!

WELL, THAT'S THE WAY IT IS IN THE LAW GAME, BARN.

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BE RUTHLESS.

YEAH.