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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:05,369 (whistling sprightly tune) 2 00:00:10,761 --> 00:00:13,252 Starring Andy Griffith... 3 00:00:13,263 --> 00:00:15,174 with Ronny Howard. 4 00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:18,265 Also sfam‘ng Don Knotrs. 5 00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:25,396 ALL: I I was seeing Nellie home I 6 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,483 J' l was seeing Nellie home J‘ 7 00:00:28,487 --> 00:00:31,650 I It was from Aunt Dinah's quilting party I 8 00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:34,569 J' l was seeing Nellie home I 9 00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:37,693 J' In the sky‘ the bright stars glittered J‘ 10 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:40,662 J‘ On the banks, the pale moon shone I 11 00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:43,783 I It was from Aunt Dinah's quilting party I 12 00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,911 J' l was seeing Nellie home I 13 00:00:46,922 --> 00:00:49,880 J' l was seeing Nellie home J‘ 14 00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:52,750 J' l was seeing Nellie home I 15 00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:55,878 I It was from Aunt Dinah's quilting party I 16 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:57,425 I l was seeing I 17 00:00:57,432 --> 00:01:01,345 I Nellie home. I 18 00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:02,468 (laughter) 19 00:01:02,479 --> 00:01:04,094 Oh, that was extra good, 20 00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:06,017 We ought to sing together more often, 21 00:01:06,024 --> 00:01:07,264 | tell you the truth. 22 00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:08,891 Would you mind settin' it over there, Ellie? 23 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,314 I love to sing alongside Barney, 24 00:01:11,321 --> 00:01:13,277 You‘re just sayin’ that. 25 00:01:13,282 --> 00:01:14,897 Oh, I think you got a real fan there, Eamey. 26 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,068 BARN EY: Think so? 27 00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,236 Yeah, boy. 28 00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:18,450 How about some more cake, Andy? 29 00:01:18,453 --> 00:01:20,114 No, thank you. I've had enough. 30 00:01:20,122 --> 00:01:21,282 How about you two? 31 00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:22,951 Well, I believe I could... 32 00:01:22,958 --> 00:01:24,949 Oh, I think they've had enough, too. 33 00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,996 Right, uh, right, gang? 34 00:01:27,004 --> 00:01:28,585 Oh. right. 35 00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:29,624 (laughing) 36 00:01:34,136 --> 00:01:35,467 (talking quietly) 37 00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:36,630 (giggling) 38 00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:54,482 What's that? 39 00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:55,524 Power tailure. 40 00:01:55,532 --> 00:01:57,022 Been happening a lot lately. 41 00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:58,615 It only lasts about a minute. 42 00:01:58,619 --> 00:01:59,984 It's all right by me. 43 00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:02,361 I think it’s more romantic. don’t you, Ellie? 44 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:03,657 (giggling): Andy. 45 00:02:15,427 --> 00:02:18,669 Nice goin'. Casanova. 46 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,134 So, they put this powder on, see, 47 00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,352 and that raises the fingerprint. 48 00:02:27,356 --> 00:02:29,347 Well‘ once you got a fingerprint. 49 00:02:29,358 --> 00:02:32,521 why‘ you just send her along to the good ol' FBI 50 00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:34,984 and that criminal‘s as good as a goner. 51 00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:40,149 Well, uh, here we are. 52 00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:43,406 It‘s been a very... 53 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,779 educational walk home. 54 00:02:45,791 --> 00:02:47,873 Oh, I'm glad you enjoyed it. 55 00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:53,162 Well... 56 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,788 Well, what? 57 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:55,880 Well, uh... 58 00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:58,216 Good night, Thelma Lou. 59 00:02:58,220 --> 00:03:00,006 Good night. 60 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:03,050 Thelma Lou? 61 00:03:03,058 --> 00:03:05,720 Yes, Barney? 62 00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,309 Next time, I’ll tell you all about the assembly 63 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:10,895 and the oiling of a (SB-caliber revolver, okay? 64 00:03:12,234 --> 00:03:13,565 Okay. 65 00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:15,104 |-|‘|| see ya. 66 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:25,367 Your move, Paw. 67 00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:26,953 I know it is. 68 00:03:26,957 --> 00:03:29,664 I'm just formulatin' my plan of attack... 69 00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:35,083 and I believe I've got her. 70 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:37,797 Sure you wanna move there, Paw? I can jump ya. 71 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:41,168 Go right ahead. You'll fall in with my plans. 72 00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:44,637 Okay. |jump.,, here. 73 00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:45,926 Now watch this. 74 00:03:45,934 --> 00:03:47,344 I ain't finished, Paw. 75 00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:51,846 I also jump here, here, here, here, and here. 76 00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:59,478 Got any plans now, Paw? 77 00:03:59,489 --> 00:04:02,231 Yeah, I got plans to quit playin' with you. 78 00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:04,904 You‘re a riverboat sharpie is what you are. 79 00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,826 ANDY: Well, good mornin’ to ya, Deputy Fife. 80 00:04:10,834 --> 00:04:13,951 You look mighty bright and bushy-tailed. 81 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:17,170 Uh, did you, uh, do all right last night? 82 00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:18,789 What are you talkin' about, 83 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,336 did I do all right? 84 00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:22,675 Well, you know, when you walked, uh, 85 00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:25,295 Thelma Lou home, uh... what happened? 86 00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:27,343 Well, what do you mean, "What happened?" 87 00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:28,931 We got there. 88 00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,971 Yeah, but alter you got there 89 00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:34,142 and you said good night at the door... did you, uh,..? 90 00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:35,480 (kissing) 91 00:04:36,902 --> 00:04:39,314 Andy, the boy. 92 00:04:39,321 --> 00:04:40,481 Huh? 93 00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:42,150 Oh. Oh, yeah. 94 00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:45,274 Um, Opie, why don't you run on out and plajfl 95 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,401 You tryin‘ to get rid of me, Paw? 96 00:04:47,412 --> 00:04:49,243 Well, uh... 97 00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:52,159 yeah, lguess that's about the size of it. 98 00:04:52,167 --> 00:04:53,782 Okay. I'll go. 99 00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:57,665 Gee whiz, you'd think 100 00:04:57,672 --> 00:05:00,505 I never heard about kissin' before. 101 00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:03,842 (door closes) 102 00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:05,460 Now-now tell, now tell me. 103 00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:07,178 Did-did you get a little kissy? 104 00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:08,513 (clears throat) 105 00:05:08,517 --> 00:05:09,677 No, I didn‘t. 106 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:10,844 You didn't? 107 00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:12,012 No, I didn‘t. 108 00:05:12,020 --> 00:05:13,681 Didn't? Well, why not? 109 00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:15,724 Well, Idon't know, Andy. 110 00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:17,518 Well, I can't help it. 111 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:20,063 When I'm alone with her, l-l just freeze up, 112 00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:22,356 I don't know what to say or what to do. 113 00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:25,401 Well, haven’t you seen enough Rock Hudson movies 114 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,524 to know how to sweet-talk a girl? 115 00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:29,401 You better tell that girl how you feel about her. 116 00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:31,027 If you don't, you're gonna lose her. 117 00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:33,371 Girls like to hear things like that. 118 00:05:33,375 --> 00:05:34,865 Well, I know. 119 00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:37,913 Well, there's plenty of things I can think of 120 00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:41,709 to say when I'm alone-- things she‘d like to hear. 121 00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:43,172 -Oh, you can? -Sure. 122 00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:44,336 Like what? 123 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,834 Well, Andy, see... 124 00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:47,336 that‘s where it gets tough, 125 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,338 Now, I usually think of these things 126 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,886 when I'm shavin‘ or soakin' my feet at night. 127 00:05:51,893 --> 00:05:55,010 Yeah. Well-well, play like you're soakin' your feet now 128 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:57,512 and tell me some of the things you say. 129 00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:58,684 Come on. 130 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:02,730 Well, uh... lsay, uh 131 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:05,604 I say, Thelma Lou... 132 00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:09,278 uh, I like you, Thelma Lou. 133 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:11,572 I like ya a lot. 134 00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:14,071 You‘re the cat's. 135 00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:16,824 |-| never said them three words 136 00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:20,077 to a girl before, Thelma Lou, but... 137 00:06:20,088 --> 00:06:21,453 but I mean it. 138 00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:23,750 You‘re the cat's. 139 00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:27,842 |-| think about ya all the time. 140 00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:33,842 Sometimes at breakfast, I stare down at my eggs 141 00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:38,312 and | see your face right in there. 142 00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:41,773 Well, there's.,. there's nothin' I'd like better 143 00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:45,314 than to have you as my steady girl, Thelma Lou 144 00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:51,067 because.,. well... like I said... 145 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:54,615 you're the cat‘s. 146 00:06:56,833 --> 00:06:58,949 Well, that's beautiful, Barney, 147 00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:00,291 I mean it. 148 00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:02,001 There‘s not a girl in the world 149 00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:03,461 that wouldn't like to hear 150 00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:05,080 things like that said to her. 151 00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:06,501 And do you know why? 152 00:07:06,509 --> 00:07:08,795 Because you‘re sincere. 153 00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:09,963 Well... 154 00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:11,461 Now, I mean it. 155 00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:14,260 Now, why can‘t you say them things to Thelma Lou? 156 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:15,928 Oh, I just can't. 157 00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:19,144 Well, what do you want, somebody to say ’em for ya? 158 00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:21,103 That wouldn’t be a bad idea. 159 00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:23,598 Barney, I declare, ljust don't understand you. 160 00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,566 You said 'em all fine right there. 161 00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:28,482 How come you can‘t say the same thing to Thelma Lou? 162 00:07:28,490 --> 00:07:32,324 Well, I guess the trouble is I can... 163 00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:35,694 I can only say 'em to a fade like yours, 164 00:07:35,705 --> 00:07:37,366 Character. 165 00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:44,828 Barney said that... 166 00:07:44,839 --> 00:07:46,249 about me? 167 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,622 He sure did. 168 00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:49,465 He said, "You're the cat's." 169 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,130 Now that‘s a direct quote. 170 00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:54,379 Well, why can't he tell me himself? 171 00:07:54,391 --> 00:07:57,508 Oh, well, Barney just can't bring himself to. 172 00:07:57,519 --> 00:08:00,477 Golly, some fellas can speak right up to their girls 173 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,391 and some can‘t. 174 00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,856 So he sent you over here to talk for him. 175 00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:06,440 So you'd play John Alden. 176 00:08:06,444 --> 00:08:07,775 Ooh, nooo! 177 00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:10,236 If he had any idea I was over here, 178 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,196 he‘d be madder than a homet. 179 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:13,690 | just thought 180 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:16,193 that you ought to know how he feels about you. 181 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,195 Well, that‘s nice of you, Andy, 182 00:08:18,206 --> 00:08:21,369 but I‘d still like to hear it from the horse's mouth. 183 00:08:21,376 --> 00:08:24,868 Well, you ain‘t exactly got a talking horse here. 184 00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:26,870 You do like Barney, don't you? 185 00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:28,621 Oh, of course I do. 186 00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:30,874 There‘s no one else. 187 00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:32,876 Well, he sure does like you. 188 00:08:32,887 --> 00:08:37,756 Oh, I wish I could hear it from his own thin lips. 189 00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:39,928 Well... 190 00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:42,678 I don't know how you'll ever get it out of that boy. 191 00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,270 Well, I don't, either, Andy 192 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:45,980 but there ought to be some way 193 00:08:45,984 --> 00:08:47,770 to provoke him into speaking up, 194 00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:49,688 You just remember one thing. 195 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,357 He thinks you're the cat's. 196 00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,979 I'll see you. 197 00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:12,294 Sarah? 198 00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:14,293 4-3-1, please. 199 00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:20,049 Barnejfl This is Thelma Lou. 200 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:25,100 Barney, guess who just came calling on me. 201 00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:34,445 All right. Put 'em up. 202 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:35,438 What? 203 00:09:35,450 --> 00:09:36,439 You heard me. Put 'em up. 204 00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:37,782 What's the matter with you? 205 00:09:37,786 --> 00:09:39,572 What‘s the matter with me? 206 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,365 Do you deny calling on my girl? 207 00:09:41,372 --> 00:09:43,283 Oh. Well, uh, Barney, uh... 208 00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,781 Well, come on. Out with R! 209 00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:46,283 Do you deny it? 210 00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:48,626 Well, uh, yeah, I called on Thelma Lou. 211 00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:50,120 0h! 212 00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,621 How could you do it?! 213 00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:53,624 How could you try to steal my girl? 214 00:09:53,635 --> 00:09:55,045 How? 215 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,042 Well, well, now, Barney, 216 00:09:56,054 --> 00:09:57,419 this may be hard for you to believe, 217 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,670 Now, lcalled on Thelma Lou 218 00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:00,797 but I called on her in your behalf. 219 00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:02,299 Oh, sure. 220 00:10:02,310 --> 00:10:04,141 Well, I did! lthought that she ought to hear 221 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:06,477 some of the things that you can‘t bring yourself to say. 222 00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:07,812 and l was just trying to help. 223 00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:08,805 Now, you’ve got to believe me. 224 00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:09,897 I didn‘t try to steal your girl. 225 00:10:09,901 --> 00:10:10,890 Oh, no? 226 00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:12,642 Well, then how come when | asked her 227 00:10:12,654 --> 00:10:14,485 for Saturday night, she turned me down 228 00:10:14,489 --> 00:10:15,979 and she said the same thing 229 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:17,480 for the next Saturday night 230 00:10:17,492 --> 00:10:19,028 and the Saturday after that and the Saturday after that! 231 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:21,151 She said she was holding them all open for youl 232 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:22,322 She did? 233 00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:23,661 Yes, she did. 234 00:10:23,665 --> 00:10:24,825 Well, uh... 235 00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,119 0h. . 236 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:30,164 (laughs) 237 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,661 Don't you get it? 238 00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,459 Oh, no, no, Andy. 239 00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:35,047 Don't try to laugh your way out of this. 240 00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:37,167 That's where you cheapen yourself. 241 00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:38,668 Well, Barney... 242 00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:41,342 How would you like it if I tried to steal Ellie away from you? 243 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:42,759 Well... 244 00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:44,553 Oh, you don't think I can, do you? 245 00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:45,892 Well, that's not 246 00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:46,884 the point. 247 00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:48,432 Pointl Well, lcan, 248 00:10:48,439 --> 00:10:51,897 and the funny part is, you're the one that showed me how. 249 00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:53,857 All I got to do is sweet-talk her, 250 00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:56,353 and I‘ve seen just enough Rock Hudson pictures 251 00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,605 -to know how to do that. -Barney.., 252 00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:00,197 Oh, this is the oldest game in the world— 253 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:02,408 stealing your best friend‘s girl. 254 00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:05,904 Well, four can play at this game, buddy. 255 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,530 You just watch me. 256 00:11:11,212 --> 00:11:12,577 Hello, Sarah? 257 00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,204 Get me Floyd's barber shop. 258 00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:16,251 You won't listen, will you? 259 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:17,920 I'm just trying... 260 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:20,088 (humming "Beautiful Dreamer") 261 00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:22,087 (humming continues) 262 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:23,429 Hello, Floyd? 263 00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:24,764 This is Barney Fife. 264 00:11:24,767 --> 00:11:26,052 Who's in the chair? 265 00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:27,470 Well, get rid of 'em. 266 00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:29,810 I‘m coming over and I‘m ready for action. 267 00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:31,725 That's right. I want the works: 268 00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:34,975 shave, haircut, witch hazel, eau de cologne, toilet water... 269 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:38,899 If it smells, I want it. 270 00:11:48,333 --> 00:11:50,039 (bell jangles) 271 00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:51,908 I‘ll be right outl I'm in the back! 272 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,060 Hello, there. 273 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:20,403 Oh, hi, Barney, 274 00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:21,816 (laughing) 275 00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:23,735 What did you do to your hair? 276 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,233 What do you mean? 277 00:12:25,245 --> 00:12:27,657 Well, I've never seen it quite that way before. 278 00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:28,744 Like it? 279 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:31,956 What have you got on you? 280 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:36,249 Kinda... gets to you, don't it? 281 00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,247 Okay, Barney, what'll it be? 282 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,294 Does it have to... 283 00:12:40,301 --> 00:12:41,791 be anything? 284 00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:43,134 Well, no. No. 285 00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:44,923 You can sit down ifyou like. 286 00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:47,047 I just have this prescription to finish. 287 00:12:47,058 --> 00:12:48,923 You know the light in here 288 00:12:48,935 --> 00:12:51,426 does crazy things to your hair, 289 00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:52,927 What? 290 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,429 Oh, why pretend? 291 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,271 I like you, Ellie. 292 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,437 You're my kind of woman. 293 00:12:58,444 --> 00:12:59,729 What?! 294 00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:04,322 Let‘s not try to fight it... baby. 295 00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:06,941 Barney Fife, have you been drinking? 296 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:08,113 Oh, baby... 297 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:09,281 Oh, now, stop. 298 00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:11,154 I haven't time for this nonsense. 299 00:13:11,165 --> 00:13:12,996 Now, stop acting like a juvenile. 300 00:13:13,001 --> 00:13:14,866 | feel sorry for you, baby. 301 00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:16,959 You had your chance to fly with me 302 00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,999 but you wasn't woman enough. 303 00:13:19,007 --> 00:13:21,339 Now the balloon's gone up without you. 304 00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,887 I knew I should've called you and warned you, 305 00:13:35,898 --> 00:13:38,731 but I just didn't think he'd go through with it. 306 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,566 Well, it looks like we got us 307 00:13:40,570 --> 00:13:42,731 the eternal quadrangle, don't it? 308 00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,354 You certainly helped matters 309 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:46,026 with that call on Thelma Lou. 310 00:13:46,034 --> 00:13:47,194 Well, dad-burn it, 311 00:13:47,201 --> 00:13:49,487 I still think l was doing the right thing. 312 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:51,907 She's just using that to make Barney jealous. 313 00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:53,074 Uh-oh. 314 00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:54,242 What's the matter? 315 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:56,206 Here comes Thelma Lou. 316 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,826 You better have a talk with her. 317 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,044 I figure to. 318 00:14:02,425 --> 00:14:03,756 Hi, Andy. 319 00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:05,751 Hello, Ellie. 320 00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:07,753 AN DY: Thelma Lou. 321 00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,551 Thelma Lcu, I want to ask you something, 322 00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:13,425 How come you told Barney I called on you? 323 00:14:13,436 --> 00:14:14,926 Well, you didn't want 324 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,973 to keep it a secret, did you? 325 00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:18,437 How would that look? 326 00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:21,057 Well, itjust seems like Barney‘s misunderstood 327 00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:22,650 the nature of that visit 328 00:14:22,653 --> 00:14:25,235 and it also seems like that you might be the one 329 00:14:25,239 --> 00:14:27,275 encouraging that misunderstanding. 330 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:28,614 Now, am I right? 331 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:30,233 Why. Andy. all I did was... 332 00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:31,575 (door opening) 333 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:38,908 Uh, well... 334 00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,410 I'd better be going. 335 00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:43,208 Bye, all. 336 00:14:43,216 --> 00:14:45,753 Bye, Andy. 337 00:14:48,930 --> 00:14:50,921 Did you hear that? "Bye, Andy. " 338 00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:52,593 That was for your benefit. 339 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,261 Can't you see what she‘s doing? 340 00:14:54,268 --> 00:14:55,633 Oh, no, no, don't. 341 00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:56,885 There‘s no point 342 00:14:56,896 --> 00:14:58,352 in playing out this farce any longer. 343 00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,096 What?! 344 00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:02,224 Oh, I think you betterjust get yourself another deputy. 345 00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:04,442 I'll just step out of the picture. 346 00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:14,744 That poor, sorrowful fella. 347 00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:19,616 He actually believes you've stolen her away from him. 348 00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:22,619 Lord, Iwished I hadn't have never got into this. 349 00:15:22,630 --> 00:15:24,461 Oh, I was just amazed 350 00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:26,626 when he walked in playing Casanova, 351 00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,124 Oh, Barney's different. 352 00:15:28,136 --> 00:15:29,467 You just call his bluff 353 00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,301 maybe wink at him a couple of times 354 00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:32,795 and I guarantee you 355 00:15:32,807 --> 00:15:34,638 he‘d run like a scared rabbit. 356 00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:38,885 Say, that's not a bad idea. 357 00:15:38,896 --> 00:15:40,386 What? 358 00:15:40,398 --> 00:15:42,559 Supposing I do make the rabbit run. 359 00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:44,728 Maybe you could work the same trick 360 00:15:44,735 --> 00:15:46,441 on your little bunny. 361 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:47,777 Thelma Lou? 362 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,441 Oh, you mean maybe 363 00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:52,065 if we get both our rabbits to run 364 00:15:52,076 --> 00:15:55,409 why, maybe theyd run right into one another. 365 00:15:55,413 --> 00:15:57,028 Mightjust. 366 00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:59,655 Well, Ellie, may I say, behind that pretty face, 367 00:15:59,667 --> 00:16:01,749 you got a awful handsome brain. 368 00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:10,083 Why, Andy. 369 00:16:10,094 --> 00:16:11,425 Hello, Thelma Lou. 370 00:16:11,429 --> 00:16:13,920 Could I, uh, talk with you for a spell? 371 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:15,341 Of course you can. Come on in. 372 00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:17,260 Wouldn‘t the porch swing 373 00:16:17,268 --> 00:16:20,931 be a little more, uh... com 374 00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:22,929 Yes, I guess it would. 375 00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,270 Say, lovely day, isn't it? 376 00:16:27,278 --> 00:16:28,768 Mm-hmm. 377 00:16:34,243 --> 00:16:38,703 Uh... what was it you wanted to say, Andy? 378 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:42,290 Can't you... guess? 379 00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,325 No. 380 00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:46,703 It's about yesterday. 381 00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,705 I‘ve been doing a lot of thinking 382 00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:51,048 and you know what? 383 00:16:53,054 --> 00:16:55,215 We can no more stop the fates 384 00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:57,305 than we can the ocean's tide 385 00:16:57,308 --> 00:16:58,844 or the sun and the moon. 386 00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,011 What? 387 00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,350 Oh, I know 388 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:02,969 when I came to call yesterday 389 00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:04,891 I came to speak for someone else. 390 00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,389 Yes? 391 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:07,810 And then 392 00:17:07,818 --> 00:17:10,730 fickle fate took over. 393 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,023 What do you mean? 394 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:13,316 Oh, I've tried. 395 00:17:13,324 --> 00:17:16,316 I've tried... but I can't fight it. 396 00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:19,069 Thelma Lou... 397 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,911 you and me are star»crossed. 398 00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:22,405 Andy! 399 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:25,249 Oh, I know I said a lot about speaking for Barney 400 00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:26,914 but that was a pretense. 401 00:17:26,921 --> 00:17:30,584 I wanted to speak for me, but I didn't dare. 402 00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,422 Well, now, I do dare. 403 00:17:32,426 --> 00:17:35,042 I am speaking for me. 404 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:40,890 Thelma Lou, I want you for my own. 405 00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,758 You call for me, Ellie? 406 00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:44,010 Oh, that's right, Barney. 407 00:17:44,021 --> 00:17:45,477 This is probably my last official act 408 00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,267 as peace officer in Mayberry. 409 00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:49,641 What's the trouble: Vandalism? Disturbing the peace? 410 00:17:49,652 --> 00:17:51,483 Being my last, I hope it's a goody. 411 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,899 Come on in the back. 412 00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:02,077 It's not an official call, Barney. 413 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:04,072 Huh? 414 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:05,948 You can put that away. 415 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:09,669 I just wanted to see you about, uh, yesterday-- 416 00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:11,208 the things you said. 417 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,957 Oh... them. 418 00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:15,458 Well, I‘m sorry. 419 00:18:15,469 --> 00:18:17,460 Oh, don't be. Say them again. 420 00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,211 Huh? 421 00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:20,429 Please? 422 00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:25,472 Uh, well, yeah... 423 00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:27,936 but when I said 'em yesterday, 424 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,931 you said I was being juvenile. 425 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:31,307 Oh, I was wrong. 426 00:18:31,319 --> 00:18:33,435 It was I who was a juvenile; 427 00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:35,437 a frightened little girl. 428 00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:37,109 Uh... frightened? 429 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:40,358 Afraid to accept the dream that was offered to me. 430 00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:41,859 But now it‘s different? 431 00:18:41,871 --> 00:18:43,953 As different as night and day. 432 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,197 Yesterday, you were Barney Fife, 433 00:18:46,208 --> 00:18:48,870 just a good friend. 434 00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:51,870 But today, I realize you're not just a friend. 435 00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,371 N-n-n-not a friend? 436 00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:55,498 No. 437 00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:58,046 You're the man I want 438 00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:01,546 and with your hair the way 't was yesterday. 439 00:19:03,559 --> 00:19:08,019 N—n-now, now, now, now, now, now, now... 440 00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:10,388 Andy, why don't you think this over? 441 00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,515 Take a little time. 442 00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:15,017 Love don't hold a stopwatch. 443 00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:17,774 Somewhere, somehow, 444 00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,569 someone wanted us to be together. 445 00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:21,565 What for? 446 00:19:23,913 --> 00:19:25,403 You did?! 447 00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:27,405 Yes, and I‘ll do it again. 448 00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:28,826 Andy Taylor! 449 00:19:31,879 --> 00:19:33,790 Ellie Walker! 450 00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:36,705 Oh! 451 00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,424 Really, Ellie? He did? 452 00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:44,717 (laughs) Huh? 453 00:19:44,725 --> 00:19:48,434 Oh, I wish you could've seen her get up off of that swing 454 00:19:48,437 --> 00:19:51,099 and mn in that house and slam that door! 455 00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:53,393 Uh, yeah... 456 00:19:53,401 --> 00:19:55,062 (quietly): I'll, uh... I'll talk to you later. 457 00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:57,401 Here comes Barney. 458 00:19:57,405 --> 00:20:00,738 0h, howdy. Howdy there, Barney. 459 00:20:00,741 --> 00:20:03,232 Golly. You look all shook up. 460 00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:04,734 Where you been? 461 00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:06,076 Andy? 462 00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:07,570 Huh? 463 00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:11,540 Uh, I don‘t know how to tell you this, but... 464 00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,409 well, you're my friend 465 00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:16,254 and... you've got a right to know. 466 00:20:16,257 --> 00:20:17,793 Know about what? 467 00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:20,587 It's about Ellie. 468 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,755 Ellie? 469 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:25,004 You better sit back, pal. 470 00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:27,802 This could be ajolt. 471 00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:30,347 (clears throat): Well, now, uh... 472 00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:32,811 I guess that you... you figure that 473 00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:35,682 Ellie's kind of... kind of sweet on you. 474 00:20:35,693 --> 00:20:37,729 But, uh... well, uh... 475 00:20:37,737 --> 00:20:39,273 I got to tell you 476 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,771 that it-it-it just ain't so. 477 00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:43,318 No? 478 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:46,067 I'vejust come from her arms. 479 00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,078 You...? 480 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:50,446 I'm sorry, Andy, 481 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:53,120 but you just got to face the fact that... 482 00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:56,460 well. I‘m the one she's sweet on. 483 00:20:56,464 --> 00:20:59,376 Oh, l-l know I ought to be happy. 484 00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:00,964 I got back at you 485 00:21:00,968 --> 00:21:03,960 and stole your girl away from you 486 00:21:03,971 --> 00:21:07,304 but, well, somehow it just don't make me happy. 487 00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:09,219 It‘s a hollow victory. 488 00:21:11,187 --> 00:21:13,394 I'm sorry, buddy. 489 00:21:13,397 --> 00:21:16,810 I‘m sorry for this whole ugly mess. 490 00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:32,074 Barney.. . 491 00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:33,492 He‘s in there. 492 00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:35,992 I don't want to see him. 493 00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:38,164 It‘s you I want. 494 00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:40,083 Y—you want me? 495 00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,211 (quiet laugh) 496 00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:46,552 Well, you're-you're the second one today. 497 00:21:46,555 --> 00:21:49,171 Barney, something happened a while ago 498 00:21:49,183 --> 00:21:51,549 that»that brought me to my senses. 499 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:52,925 Yeah? 500 00:21:52,937 --> 00:21:56,054 Barney, now... now don't be angry, 501 00:21:56,065 --> 00:21:58,021 but I made up that whole thing with Andy 502 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,435 just to get you jealous. 503 00:22:01,362 --> 00:22:02,818 You-you did? 504 00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:07,111 Whether you sweet-talk me or not, Barney, 505 00:22:07,117 --> 00:22:08,823 it's you I want. 506 00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:10,534 (quiet laugh) 507 00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:13,200 (clears throat): Well, you know... 508 00:22:13,207 --> 00:22:16,370 it's, uh, it's funny that you should say that. 509 00:22:16,377 --> 00:22:17,742 It is? 510 00:22:17,753 --> 00:22:19,459 Yeah. Because, well... 511 00:22:19,463 --> 00:22:23,331 something happened to me, too, a little while ago. .. 512 00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:26,379 something that I... I thought I wanted to happen, 513 00:22:26,387 --> 00:22:29,629 but, well, when it happened, why... 514 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,255 nothing happened. 515 00:22:31,267 --> 00:22:32,882 Nothing? 516 00:22:32,893 --> 00:22:37,057 No. lt-it come to me then that. .. 517 00:22:37,064 --> 00:22:40,727 Well, you're... you're the only gin for me. 518 00:22:40,734 --> 00:22:43,476 Oh, Barney... 519 00:22:44,530 --> 00:22:47,021 Poor old Andy. 520 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:51,696 Well... some of us got it, some of us ain't. 521 00:23:00,629 --> 00:23:01,994 Ellie? 522 00:23:02,006 --> 00:23:03,837 Looks like we did it. 523 00:23:03,841 --> 00:23:07,709 Yeah. Romeo and Juliet just walked off arm in arm. 524 00:23:13,684 --> 00:23:15,345 I Oh, little Liza, little Liza Jane I 525 00:23:15,352 --> 00:23:18,139 I Oh, little Liza, little Liza Jane I 526 00:23:18,147 --> 00:23:21,389 I Well, oh, little Liza, little Liza Jane I 527 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:25,268 I Oh, I'fitle Liza, little Liza Jane. I 528 00:23:25,279 --> 00:23:27,941 Extra good! I love them fast 'un's like that. 529 00:23:27,948 --> 00:23:29,688 I think I'm going to get us a snack. 530 00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:31,190 Oh! Good idea! 531 00:23:31,201 --> 00:23:32,532 Good idea, Ellie! 532 00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:34,902 Yeah, a little snack would do us good right now. 533 00:23:34,914 --> 00:23:37,121 A little snack never hurt nobody. 534 00:23:37,124 --> 00:23:42,460 Whoo, yeah, boy! Mm! 535 00:23:42,463 --> 00:23:44,670 Uh... don‘t you think 536 00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:46,459 you better help Ellie in the kitchen? 537 00:23:46,467 --> 00:23:49,300 Naw, she does very well by herself. 538 00:23:49,303 --> 00:23:50,634 (laughing) 539 00:23:50,638 --> 00:23:52,128 (clears throat) 540 00:23:52,139 --> 00:23:56,257 (sighing): Ah, boy... 541 00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:57,974 (smacks lips, sniffs) 542 00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:02,516 Hmm? 543 00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:08,443 Oh, uh... 544 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,733 let me, uh, let me give you a hand, Eleanor. 545 00:24:14,244 --> 00:24:15,825 (clears throat) 546 00:24:15,829 --> 00:24:17,820 Well, Thelma Lou, looks like you and me 547 00:24:17,831 --> 00:24:19,196 are alone together at last. 548 00:24:19,208 --> 00:24:20,994 (nervous laugh) 549 00:24:24,171 --> 00:24:25,707 Hey, Barney, you want some pie? 550 00:24:25,714 --> 00:24:27,830 Yeah. Pie's fine. I'll have pie. 551 00:24:27,841 --> 00:24:29,172 (both laugh nervously) 552 00:24:29,176 --> 00:24:30,507 (clears throat) 553 00:24:30,511 --> 00:24:32,001 Well, where were we? 554 00:24:35,182 --> 00:24:37,013 You want some cheese on your pie? 555 00:24:37,017 --> 00:24:39,224 Uh, cheese is fine. A l'ttle cheese. 556 00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:46,731 You want cream and sugar in your coffee? 557 00:24:46,735 --> 00:24:48,145 Yeah, yeah, yeah! 558 00:24:48,153 --> 00:24:49,984 Cream and sugar and pie and cheese 559 00:24:49,989 --> 00:24:51,399 and I'll get it myself! 560 00:24:58,580 --> 00:25:00,571 (whistling sprightly tune) 37499

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