Original subtitles

Alright, Yesmay? I want to see more… fire in you.

-Even more? -You have a beast inside you.

-A beast? -Set it free.

-It wants to fight. -Right.

You're going to let it. Yes? Okay, do it.

-But… -Raw power. We're rolling again!

Rolling.

Hotter Than all those haters

Let's go Nobody does it better

Yesmay

It's a warning Global warming

In my head, on my skin Just sweat it out

My dikes are breaking There's no faking

Oh shit This track is so lit

Oh yeah Global warming

You're changing my climate

Ooh, la, la, la

Let's go Global

Ooh, la, la, la

Global, yeah Global

Ooh, la, la, la

Cut! Hey, Yesmay? Is something wrong?

Hugo, I just don't know about this.

I mean, the choreography, this skirt. It is way too…

-Too long, yes. -You think it's too long?

Shorter is better. Then the video will go viral.

Great idea. Cestmocro is going to love that.

But you should really be more concerned about your vibe.

I want to see more raw power. Yes?

What exactly do you mean by that?

I'll explain it tonight, at my house. Yes? Bathrobe.

-Bathrobe? -Bathrobe! Let's go!

Just exude more sex. It's very feminist, you're comf…

-Bathrobe… -For her, not for me.

You are very comfortable in your femininity and…

-You looked really good on screen. -Really?

-Yes. I wouldn't worry, if I were you. -Oh, thanks.

Just a sec. Hey, amigo. What's your name?

-Elias. -I see that you have a dream.

Make it big in film and TV. The new Tarantino.

-Yeah, perhaps. -Great.

But are you the director on this set? No, you're not.

-You are a… -A runner.

A runner, yes. And a runner runs.

I direct and when I say something, you don't walk, you run.

-Yes. -Thanks.

But I expected to do a bit more than just bring bathrobes.

You want to do more? Okay. Go get coffee for the whole crew.

Okay, we're going to roll again!

Set clear!

Yesmay, raw power, okay? Play the track, please.

Hotter…

Hey, Yesmay!

Nobody does it…

Sorry, sorry! Apologies!

Just a short interruption.

Mieke, listen. I'm not sure about this. This video and this outfit…

But you look great! You're absolutely radiant!

And this is what the people want to see.

Trust me, this video will be your comeback!

And I have great news.

You are going to an island in the Pacific Ocean for two weeks.

For a new dating and survival show.

You and seven other national celebrities. I've arranged that for you.

You're welcome, don't mention it.

Dating and survival on an island? I don't really know if I want to do reality TV.

This is going to make you super famous.

Reality TV begets attention, attention begets talk shows, talk shows begets…

More attention.

More shows, more concerts, more merch, more money.

Not that it's all about money.

But if you want a solo career, you have to play the game.

Yes, but flirting on an island? I mean, people already see me in a certain way.

This is your chance to prove them wrong.

You're going to show those haters who you really are.

You're a woman with pizzazz, a power girl. Hey.

A while back a strong girl came to me because she wanted to go solo after Girl.

And I could tell by the look on her face that she was willing to do what it takes.

Stadium concerts. A massive tour.

-That's what you want, right? -Yes.

-I really want that. -Very good.

Just do some flirting on an island and then in no time

you'll fill up stadiums.

Are you ready for a fantastic new show?

This summer, eight single celebrities

will compete against each other in a passionate game

in which everything revolves around love.

Did I say love? I mean sex!

These hot candidates will battle it out in difficult challenges

and the winner will spend a night in the hot…

Villa of Temptation.

If you win a night in the villa, you can't be voted off in the eliminations.

Who will be the winner of…

Expedition Cupid.

These are our singles.

Chef Frits has his own popular vegan restaurant,

but will the women want a taste of him?

Will former kickboxer Kahnil have to fight off the women

or will he go home alone?

Former top model Estelle has traveled to many exotic places,

but will she survive this hot island?

Can writer Noortje Sas use the erotic fantasies in her books

to seduce the men?

Will beauty influencer Laila show us her true colors

or will she have to use her charms?

Can comedian Mika find someone

with the same bad sense of humor as his?

Can rocker Thymen seduce everyone with his sultry voice

or will he get voted off?

And will former child star Yesmay from the girl band Girl

finally be taken seriously, or will she seriously get taken?

We are going to kick things off with the first challenge.

I'm taking the first win.

This is going to be the show of my life.

Can I please rest for a moment? We just got here.

Challenge 1. Three, two, one…

Go!

Who will find their bag of rocks first?

I'm so excited for this!

Thymen is slipping. Hold on tight to your sack, Thymen.

Switch up that mindset.

Your boy Thymen is here for one thing: to win.

Once the bag has been found, they move on to the next part.

Stack your Stones.

With adrenaline rushing through their bodies,

they must stay as calm as possible.

Thymen sucks up balls for the next exciting part:

Balls in your Mouth!

It looks like Estelle has had balls in her mouth before.

Yesmay hesitates, but Laila has a real talent for this!

And then the last part. Can he shoot the bell?

A slight tap, but it's enough to complete the challenge

and with that, Thymen wins a horny night in the Villa of Temptation.

Seriously?!

In the pocket. Bob's your uncle. The Villa of Temptation is mine.

Such a shame. But hey, it's okay. Next time…

Stop!

Did I say something wrong?

Did I do something wrong or…

Make it a bit more exciting. Sexy.

That I lost?

Yes, just give us a juicy quote. Something like…

"I didn't win, but I did get wet and sweaty."

That's not something I would say.

Yesmay, this is the Dutch audience.

Just look at that smile. They are so happy.

"Yesmay, Yesmay…"

Don't disappoint them. Give it your own special flavor.

-Flavor? -Make it spicy, Yesmay.

Okay…

-So get in touch with your femininity. -Okay.

Female empowerment. Shoulders back. Chest forward.

Very good. Bring the sweat!

And… action.

I didn't win, but I did get wet and sweaty.

-Like that? -Perfect. Ed?

What do you think of this?

Oh, I really love it when you…

Okay. Moving on!

Jonas?

Jonas!

Take him to the first aid tent.

We are already behind schedule. Get a replacement right away.

-Shouldn't we wait if Jonas gets better? -Pauline, your input doesn't matter.

I think, I say, you do.

Arrange a replacement.

-Hugo. -Hey Hugo, it's Pauline.

Hey Pauline, do you finally have a paid job for me?

We've lost our sound guy and need a replacement for our TV show.

Two weeks on a tropical island, flight and accommodation included.

-At minimum pay. -Sure, Pauline…

If there's someone willing to do that job, I'll eat my own dick.

I'll do it.

You're not a sound guy.

I've done things with sound before. How difficult can it be?

Hey Pauline, I have a very talented young man here

with a lot of experience in television.

-Perfect, when can he come? -The sooner, the better.

After the first challenge, the singles have to build their own camp

with survival tools they crafted themselves.

I see Yesmay and think, let's introduce myself.

Flame on!

That's my power yell, for when I go into battle.

-Hey, Yesmay. -Hey.

Your boy Mika here. Massive Girl fan.

I always thought you were the best. How you dance and sing…

Starting off strong.

Thanks. I was only 14 then…

Fourteen?

-Yes. How old were you then? -Doesn't matter.

It would matter if someone was in love with you then.

But I wasn't. I don't like children, you know.

Or I mean, I like children, but just children on the street.

That sounds even worse.

I mean, I love people. I'm a people person.

Good save, Mika.

Hey, how are you doing?

Very good, actually.

I've got Yesmay completely in tha pocket.

I've found the perfect place for a camp.

A camp? Not a good plan. What if the tide comes in?

-It's high tide now… -Your camp will be washed away.

Everything wet. You'll get a cold, pneumonia.

-Do you want that? No. -No…

We need to build a camp on higher ground.

-Where it's dry. -Exactly, sheltered from the wind.

Let the men handle this. We'll build you super nice camp. Right?

-We got this. -Mika, let's go.

Leave it to us.

There is one person who doesn't have to worry about the night ahead,

because he'll sleep in the Villa of Temptation.

But with whom?

Do you know what I always say, Frits?

Looks are nice,

but what is really important for Thymen is a beautiful character.

Why are we sharpening these sticks?

Great for the "survival" footage. It looks good. Continue!

While the others are working on setting up camp,

opposites Laila and Noortje Sas try to catch some food.

That is really impossible.

My mom always said that if you want something, you shouldn't be subtle.

You have to give it your all. There!

Good advice.

Maybe that's why she's alone.

I think it's great what you do. Writing.

Oh. Thanks.

I've been writing stories since I was very little.

Although these days it's just writing soft porn in my attic.

You create new things. That takes courage.

-I'm just messing around, it feels like. -Your books are really nice.

-You read my books? -Yes.

With Therese on Malta is a wonderful book.

Okay, and now with fish!

To make it seem as if the ladies did it all themselves.

And you have to smile.

While Laila and Noortje Sas catch lunch, Frits goes for a different delicacy.

-You eat them raw. -Yes?

And the taste of sea urchin is a bit nutty

and comes very close to a soft, creamy lobster.

Okay.

Lobster. I heard lobster.

Hey, be careful with those thick, hard spines.

Yes, don't worry.

-You have to survive on this island. -I'll be fine.

Yes…

-Ew, is there really nothing else? -Well…

"You've had dirtier things in your mouth."

-Say that, Fritsie. -You want me to say that?

A little playful comment. Viewers love that, you know.

It's good for your image. Just tease Yesmay a little bit.

-Yesmay, say that quote again. -Which quote?

"Ew, is there really nothing else?"

Action.

Ew, is there really nothing else?

You've had dirtier things in your mouth.

Guys, this has to be a lot more sexy.

Yesmay, put some extra meaning into the question.

-Extra meaning? -Yes. Like…

"Is there really nothing else?"

-Use those pretty eyes and that sweet mug. -Mug?

-Your face. -Seduce him.

I don't like this. I thought this was about food.

This is about survival, Frits. About primal attraction.

Action.

Ew, is there really nothing else?

More playful and flirtatious. More sex. Come on.

Ew, is there really nothing else?

Make me crazy, Frits.

You've had dirtier things in your mouth, right?

Keep looking at each other, for the voice-over.

While sparks fly between Yesmay and Frits, Thymen goes crazy with jealousy.

Thymen, a jealous look in three, two, one…

We got it. Great. Don't you just love the tension, Pauline?

Ed?

-Sea snail. Nice… -Oh, very slippery.

Look here, a really fat snail. Look at it.

How are you?

Do you like it like this?

I had hoped to lose a bit of weight here, but…

You don't have to lose weight.

Okay, suck-up.

But I love it. Keep it coming.

Whassup, bitches?

As soon as I arrive, there's a silence.

That is the alpha energy.

That looks yummy. The food too, by the way.

Bye, bye! Good luck!

Elias!

-Hey. -Pauline. Glad you could come so quickly.

I had an opening.

Here's your contract. On then second page, sign here.

It's a confidentiality and responsibility agreement.

You'll see the participants. That's a secret.

You'll see who wins. Also a secret.

You may see some questionable things. Also a secret.

-What happens at Expedition Cupid… -Stays at Expedition Cupid.

You don't want to spend the next ten years in court.

Here's your audio recorder.

-Come with me. -Oh, sorry.

Rutger?

-Elias Moudani. -Hi. Welcome to Expedition Cupid.

My name is Rutger.

I create magic with this ragtag bunch of misfits.

You've already met Pauline?

Pauline is my right hand. It does all the hard jobs.

You're in luck, brother. It's lunch time.

Don't they catch their own food?

Welcome to the weird world of TV.

This format apparently comes from Germany. Have you ever seen it?

Yes! Insel der Lust. Das Executione.

Supergeil.

Sounds a bit dirty in German, right?

-I don't watch TV at all anymore. -Me neither.

It's nothing but weird reality shows these days.

-Hey, Yesmay. -Hey! Wow.

Did you come to this island to hand me my bathrobe?

-I don't hand out bathrobes anymore. -Oh, too bad.

Now I hand out delicious latte macchiatos.

-So you've been promoted. -Yes.

-My career is really taking off. -I can see that.

-Elias. -The runner. Who doesn't walk, but…

Runs. Yes, that was then, but now I'm a sound guy.

-You, a sound guy? -Or audio engineer, if you will.

Okay. Fake it till you make it.

Shouldn't you be hunting for food or something?

-It's a survival show, right? -Yes, but it's TV.

-So? -So, we pretend.

Audio guy!

My boss is calling, so…

-You'd better go, Rutger has a short fuse. -Okay, I'll go then.

-Ciao. -Bye.

One more rule: crew and talent don't mingle.

They eat and sleep separately.

You're here to record audio, not to chat with contestants.

-You need focus. Do you have focus? -Yeah, I'm focused.

Good. Otherwise you will get a ticket back home.

That you pay for.

-Capiche? -Capiche.

And the crew eats over there.

I wouldn't eat that, if I were you.

The previous sound guy got sick from it. It's crazy stuff.

Pauline, lobster à la crème again?!

Better than sea urchin, right, Fritsie?

They are terrible people.

Who can't do anything themselves and are always pampered.

Nice job, Pauline. I couldn't have built it better myself.

We want to film again in half an hour. Can you put the last leaves on?

No problem. Hey, if you need me,

I'll be chilling over there.

Take a look at that table.

That table, my boy, is a battlefield.

A power struggle, fought with manipulative games.

Jealousy, hatred, envy.

All those celebrities have one thing in common.

They were A-listers, but are now C-listers.

Wild hair from Amsterdam

They all need this show to give their careers a much-needed boost.

And Yesmay?

Former girl band chick who thinks she has talent.

Like a pole dancer doing karaoke.

Yesmay is too nice for Expedition Cupid. People take advantage of that.

-She's definitely the weakest link. -Ed…

It's true, isn't it? Really.

As the sun disappears behind the horizon,

the candidates discuss who will have to go home first.

Hey, I'd like to say something.

I really feel like I've known you for a long time.

As if we're a family.

Well, of course you can't choose your family,

except maybe those couples who go abroad to adopt a child.

Or lesbian couples looking for a sperm donor.

Then you can choose.

But I haven't chosen my family. And they haven't chosen me either.

But hey, who's sitting at home now

and who is on an island in the Pacific Ocean?

Who's laughing now, bitches?!

It just sucks that someone has to go home soon.

Have you already decided who you're going to vote for?

No, that's a very difficult decision.

Yeah, the same goes for me.

Well, I'd better go and prepare my sleeping area.

Yes.

I'll see you at the elimination later. Finish him!

Fatality! Crazy.

-May the best one win, eh? -Yes.

Okay, everybody vote for Mika.

-Yes. -Definitely.

No. He means well. He's just a little socially awkward.

A very strange energy, this guy.

He's just a sweet guy.

If you want to survive, you shouldn't be sweet.

Sweet animals are food.

-Everybody votes for Mika. Yes? -Yes.

-Hey. -Hi.

-How are you? -Yeah, I'm fine.

My management says I really need this show, to further my career.

Don't let them get to you, okay?

If it were up to me, you won't be going home anytime soon.

I really see how powerful you are here.

Really.

Other people might think: what a dumb, talentless cow,

such an ignorant floozy…

But not me.

I see much more. I see…

I see a fighter.

A go-getter. A strong woman.

For real?

So that's why I thought, if you come with me tonight

to the Villa of Temptation, we'll develop a strategy together.

No.

Sorry, I never wanted to… No.

You're giving off mixed signals, Yesmay.

-Excuse me? -Excuse me?

You've been eye-fucking me all day.

And then I approach you, and bam! Smack in my face.

Dammit, Yesmay! I don't want to play these games.

I'll see you at the elimination.

Go, go, go.

I need to pee, do you need to film that too?!

Is she really going to pee?

If she starts crying, I want it get it on camera.

Oh, that Yesmay. Really…

You know what I'm saying?

-Want to go for a little walk? -Yes. Okay.

Come with me?

I want to show you something really special.

Come with me for a moment.

I really see how powerful you are here.

Expedition Cupid. The elimination.

Candidates, welcome to the first elimination round

of Expedition Cupid.

Who has to go home first?

Everyone risks having to leave the island today, except Thymen.

Thymen, you can share your immunity. Who do you share it with?

Exciting…

Estelle.

We will now say goodbye to one of you.

Laila.

Kahnil.

Nice.

Yesmay.

This is your tube.

Yes!

Mika.

Mika, the island has decided.

-Go pack up your things. -This is really terrible.

-Hey… -Thanks for everything.

Eliminated first. You wouldn't wish that on your worst enemies.

I'm sure it's been a difficult decision for everyone.

It was probably a close call.

At least I can go back to my crib now. The whole house, just for me.

-And my two cats. -Cut!

So boring! This has the tempo of a turtle orgy. But less sexy.

Well, Olaf…

This is only episode one. It gets more exciting.

We have to start off strong! I want to see them fighting, arguing.

Nosebleeds. Tears and tits! That's what people want.

The drama will come. I'm slowly building it up.

No good! Start off with a bang!

No lube, no foreplay. Bam!

More fucking, more crying, more fighting!

Make those people crazy and horny. That's what we hired them for.

Think of them as little dolls that you can completely destroy.

These nobodies are your fucking Ninja Turtles.

Break them, demolish them!

-And throw that stupid bimbo out. -You mean Yesmay?

She is there for the young demographic. But she's useless if she's a prude.

You know what, let's do it. Yesmay is the next one to go.

Rutger… This your island.

Your tribe. Your show.

If you make this a hit, you'll do all the big shows in the Netherlands.

-Come on! Go! -Okay, I'll make sure we…

Go!

-There, you heard him. -Yes.

-Put them under pressure. Fucking, crying. -Yes.

I'm a winner!

-Hey. -Hey, where can I put my stuff?

Back there.

Expedition Cupid. Villa of Temptation.

Wild hair from Amsterdam With its canals and its charms

-Oh! -Mi casa, su casa.

So beautiful.

Please, have a seat.

A little chocolate.

-Merci. -Beaucoup.

Have you…

thought about who you are going to vote for?

Yes, I did.

-For you. -Oh, yeah?

But maybe you can convince me…

-to vote for someone else. -And how should I do that…

-Let's go, baby! -Take it off.

Hit me!

Hurry up.

-Who are you going to vote for? -For you.

Sorry about earlier. I…

-You're just doing your job, right? -Yes…

I'm not supposed to say this, but you're the next one that has to go.

What?

-Says who? -The producers.

They want to create more drama or something.

They are just fucking with us.

Do they want to make me even more insecure?

What kind of game is this?

If you win the challenge tomorrow, they can't vote you off.

Immunity?

-I'm going to win that challenge. -Yes, you are.

-I'm going to win that motherfucker. -You're going to win, dammit.

Yes…

-Go get 'em. -Thanks.

Challenge 2.

Welcome to the second challenge.

The candidates have to slide across the foam track,

then run across the balance beam

and then fill their cylinder with water.

As soon as the duckie floats, they have to drag along these heavy crates

and then finish with the spectacular finale.

The Spiral.

I'm still aching from yesterday and again, a challenge?

What on earth have I gotten myself into?

I've seen tougher challenges.

Hey, if you can't stand the heat, get out of my kitchen!

After Mika's departure, the remaining candidates fight to get immunity.

You know what?

That night in the villa gives me an advantage.

I don't intend to give that up.

I have to win. I'll do anything for immunity.

Are you ready?

Three, two, one…

Go!

Look at them sliding in the foam. Their pants all wet.

That was a slippery start.

I got some bruises, but that's okay. All in good fun.

And now across the beam.

This is what I trained for. Do you see it?

Eyes here, not here.

Who will be the first to fill their cylinder?

Come on!

Thymen, make sure you don't drip!

Yesmay is letting her water slosh all over.

Yes!

Thymen takes the lead, but here is Yesmay!

She's breathing down his neck.

This is my time to show what I can do.

Look at that thing move.

Yesmay has got a firm grip and thrusts it forward.

Yesmay is a firecracker.

And then the last part: The Spiral.

Thymen has a slight lead,

but Yesmay seems to have experience with coils.

Okay, focus…

Thymen tries to be the first to reach the end…

Too bad, Thymen. Go back.

Yesmay longs for that night in the villa. You can see it in her eyes.

If she win this challenge, she wins immunity.

Who will come out on top?

-Thymen has to go back. -Come on!

Is it Yesmay? The last stretch. Will she make it?

And…

Yes, Yesmay! And now that button!

There we go, bang!

And Yesmay is the winner!

Who could have predicted this?

Wow, I just won! I have immunity!

It was very difficult, but I did it.

Expedition Cupid. The elimination.

Hey. Great job.

-Elimination round two. -Thanks.

Who will have to fly back to the Netherlands?

But first, Yesmay, congratulations.

You have won immunity.

-Noortje Sas. -Yes…

Congratulations.

Kahnil. This tube is yours.

-Congratulations. -Nice.

Thymen.

-Thymen… -No!

You must leave the island.

Oh, well…

That's what I would have said if you weren't in possession

of the ultra-joker you found.

What? Ultra-joker?

-What are there ultra-jokers? -That's the game, Yesmay.

Totally unpredictable.

With this ultra-joker, Thymen, you can decide who goes home.

Even if that person has immunity.

Seriously?

Thymen, the decision is yours. Who has to go home?

Yesmay.

Yesmay, what a shame. You can go pack your bags.

Hey, move.

Yesmay, this was your chance to show you're made of.

Do you feel like you messed it up?

No.

Well, yeah… Maybe.

It seems like everyone was against you.

Yesmay, it seems like everyone was against you.

How does that feel?

That almost no one wanted you here, on this island.

That everyone thinks you're just a stupid bimbo.

…a stupid bimbo.

Someone who is a nobody. Completely useless.

-Stupid bimbo. -Come on, cry.

-Shorter is definitely better. -They don't like you.

Unfriendly. Distant. Aloof.

-More sex! -That's what you want, right?

What would you like to say?

I…

I don't take it personally. It's just a game.

It's a shame, but nothing more.

Where are the tears? I want to see that bimbo bawl!

For her to become a meme.

Kids have to ridicule her, with scathing comments.

I'll make that happen, Olaf.

-What? But, Rutger… -You'll get those tears.

Yesmay is about to leave.

Audio guy, one last interview.

Is that really necessary? She's already upset.

Listen, if you don't help me get that fucking juice,

I'll make sure you end up on the blacklist. How does that sound?

Who cares what she thinks about you? You'll never see her again.

-Too bad you have to go. -Yes. It sucks.

Management will drop me now for sure.

I'll have to go back to being a cashier.

-Are you even allowed to talk to me? -Ah yes, since I am crew and you are…

Talent, of course.

Well, I can assure you that I am here for professional reasons.

You need one more quote?

Yes, they want to see you cry. That's what the big boss want.

Assholes.

I won't give a quote. No way.

So…

Guys, we have to go! Wet weather is coming!

Rutger, you have to have more control over the testimonials.

Write dialogue for them. We'll cut and paste it together later.

Sure, I'm on it.

-We have to go. -You'll get those tears.

Little heads-up: there's a hurricane coming your way.

Sorry? Did you say 'hurricane'?

We deliberately booked during the storm season,

when everything is cheaper.

'Hurricane Patricia' will almost completely pass you by…

-Almost? -Cover up all the equipment.

No reason to panic. Show must go on!

Good luck!

Show must go on!

That salty water is really horrible for my hair.

See?

Hey guys, this doesn't look good, right?

Does a bit of rain scare you, papi chulo?

Oh my god! I did it!

I'm a jungle woman!

-Fuck Rutger, we can do this ourselves. -We can do this ourselves.

Yesmay! Wait!

We would like one last quote from you.

Don't worry.

Okay, go, go!

No! The show goes on! We stay on the island!

We have to get out of here.

Get on board! We have to get out of here, quickly!

-I've got you. -We'll sail right into the storm.

-Move! -Untie the ropes!

-Rutger, this is not a good idea. -This is my decision.

-Go inside. -Inside!

Everyone inside!

Out of the way!

Hang on!

Holy shit. I thought I was dying.

I saw my entire career flashing before my eyes.

I'm hurt! I have to get help!

I need get help.

Pauline!

Pauline!

Yesmay!

Yesmay!

-Where the fuck are we? -We're back on the island.

This is not our island.

Edwin!

Ed!

Edwin!

Ed!

Are you okay?

-Yes. -Yes?

Yes, I'm okay!

Hello?!

Well, this is a bit of a bummer.

We can assume that the others…

Survived too?

Yes, let's hope so.

Hey, I want compensation for this.

Emotional damage, mental damage, psychological damage.

-That's the same thing. -I want three times as much.

I totally understand. We'll handle that.

Pauline will arrange that for you back on the mainland.

When our team realizes that they've lost contact with us,

-they will come and rescue us. -Oh, yeah?

-And how will they find us? -Why wouldn't they?

There are hundreds of islands here. A rescue operation will take days.

-They can just send a helicopter. -Do you know how big the ocean is?

Okay, guys. First things first. Where are we?

-Somewhere near Spain, right? -Spain?

We're in the fucking Pacific Ocean!

You're the production assistant here.

-Excuse me? -Take it easy.

-Nerd. -Fucking hell, guys! Okay!

This is a bummer. A major setback. But I'm sure we'll be rescued soon.

If we want to survive until then, we'll have to find food.

I suggest we split into two teams.

One searches along the coastline, the other in the woods.

Thank you for your input, Yesmay.

But I am the one with the most experience on a tropical island.

Have you forgotten that I made three seasons of Op Reis met Rik, for RTL4?

What? 2.5 million viewers every week. A nomination for a Golden Televizier Ring.

-Awesome. -I know.

Let's just approach this wisely and take advice

from the person who knows the most about food.

Our secret weapon: Frits, the food whisperer.

Okay.

We make two teams. One searches the coastline, the other the forest.

We're looking for food.

It won't be much, but bring me things like shellfish, berries and insects

and I will turn it into a nutritious meal.

Great plan, Frits.

You heard it. Let's get to work.

Pauline will check if some useful stuff washed up.

-Okay folks, let's go! And, action. -Fucking do it!

-2.5 million viewers, really? -Yes.

But we hit 3.2 million at a certain point.

Seriously?

-Do you think this is edible? -Frits will probably know.

Okay. Here.

What the fuck was that?

Calm down, guys. Hey.

Come on, it's your boy Thymen. "Wild Hair from Amsterdam".

Okay, there's something here. A fucking tiger or something.

Let's go.

Everyone has worked hard. We have gathered the following.

Some berries, fruits and… a puffer fish.

Okay, Fritsie. Whip us up a delicious meal.

Get out my kitchen, because the food whisperer is about to bring the heat.

Chop, chop, motherfucker.

Time to make some fuego.

Nice, Fritsie.

Can we really eat this?

I made three seasons of Cooking in the Jungle.

But if you don't want it, fine. Then there's just more for me.

-Okay then. -Cheers.

-So many flavors! -Jesus, Frits. Are you okay?

Yes, this is another bummer.

The food whisperer almost killed us all.

Fare thee well, warrior.

Red? Serious?

The elimination color?

It was totally random.

You could have chosen green. Just sayin'.

Go on, laugh.

I'm gonna die here.

I'm gonna die here, dammit.

Rutger…

This is your island. Your tribe.

Your show.

-You're the fucking leader. -I'm the boss.

Get up! Go!

If we die, I'll have lived my life to the fullest.

I squeezed it like an orange, every last fucking drop.

-You've gotten the most out of life? -Absolutely.

Threesomes, quattros, sex on cocaine, sex on MDMA,

-sex on cocaine ánd MDMA. -Wow.

Sex on stage, sex in my Porsche, sex on my horse.

-What about love? -Love…

-So old-fashioned. -Children?

Once. But I thought she was 18, really.

Can you picture me as a dad?

-I do want children one day. -One day?

Are you making plans for the future? That's quite bold.

One thing you can devote your life to is just having a lot of sex.

Yes, high on drugs. That's important.

-In a Porsche or on a horse. -Yes.

What have you done with your life?

-It was a joke, Thymen. -No, seriously.

What have you achieved?

I won an Edison twice.

-Not once. Two… -Twice, right.

-We get it. -Yes.

Maybe you can use one to build a hut with.

Yeah, or maybe you can use it to kill a fish or something?

No, that's mean.

Nice work, Pauline.

Can I help?

Yeah. Sure.

-Thanks for saving my life. -Of course.

I can't let my personal assistant drown.

Because I need to do everything for you?

-Just kidding. -You're right.

It's okay. That's how the roles are divided.

It's not okay.

I'm sorry.

-Where did you learn that? -From playing in the streets as a kid.

-Building huts in the neighborhood. -You did that?

-Then I started kickboxing. -And demolishing stuff.

True. I've wrecked a lot of shit in my life.

Hey, but you're not doing it right.

-Show me how I should do it then. -Hey, you're distracted. How come?

If you stop talking, I can keep working.

If looks could kill…

There! Our new Villa of Temptation!

-Are you okay? -Yes. An old injury.

Yes, against Javoski, in 2018.

I saw it live.

-My dad was a fan of yours. -Really?

So was I.

Stop! Oh, Jesus!

-What the hell are you doing? -A massage?

Did you learn that in a torture camp?

-Sorry… -It got worse.

Here, look.

Okay… There.

That's how you do that. You see?

Like kneading bread.

With a bit of care. A bit of love.

Do you know what my favorite constellation is?

Well?

The Big Dipper.

A very horny good morning, lovebirds.

Or should I say, one-night-stand birds?

All hunters, gather here!

What the fuck is this?

-This is primal. -Primal?

In order to survive, we go back to basics. To the core of our lizard brain.

To the primal version of ourselves where we hunted for food

with knives and spears we carved from bone and wood.

We draw on our primal creativity that is necessary for survival.

-Okay… -Nice.

We have a problem. We don't have much water left.

And our body needs 2000 calories per day.

-Per day. -Men even a bit more.

There are six of us, so that's…

Well, a lot of food. And that's why we go hunting.

If we don't, we will be faced with difficult choices.

You're not going to eat me. No way.

I see those cannibal looks of yours. So look the other way.

We have to get off this island. If we stay here, we're going to die.

We can go hunting and maybe find some food.

That'll work for a few days. But there are six of us.

To do that every day? No way.

We need to figure out how to get out of here.

Thanks for your pessimistic input. Not our vibe though.

Getting out of here is the only way to survive.

Getting away is the only way to…

We don't even know where we are.

-The mainland is that way. -How do you know that?

-Star navigation. -Exactly.

Yeah, okay. But how do we get there?

-Let's build a raft. -We have to stay here.

-That's a stay of execution. -We stay.

-Then we're going to die. -This is my decision!

I run the show here!

I decide what happens!

We stay. So we go hunting.

One more rule. Whoever catches something, eats.

If you don't catch anything, you don't eat either.

Nothing. Nada. Zip.

Come.

-Damn. -Look.

It's all about the right spirit.

-Ah yes, the right spirit? -Really, look.

You just have to go all Bear Grylls.

And then you look…

-Did you catch anything? -Look.

Peace?

Look.

You've caught a fish!

Do you have it?

You just had a fish.

We had a fish.

This is not enough for everybody.

Either we all go hungry, or some of us get a good meal.

-We can draw straws. -Yes, or take turns not eating.

Or we vote.

Who eats and who doesn't?

-That's ridiculous. -It is ridiculous, yes.

Crazy even. But it's also necessary.

Fine. Tonight we vote who doesn't eat.

-Agreed? -No, that doesn't seem okay.

-This is what I warned you about. -Just shut up.

We don't need to hear that pessimistic bullshit.

-Either you're with us… -Or what?

You vote that I can't eat?

Everyone has voted. Welcome to this elimination round.

Who isn't going to eat tonight?

It could be anyone. No one has immunity.

Kahnil.

Yesmay.

Lucky you.

Elias.

Well, that's a clear result.

-Too bad. -Fine!

Sore loser.

-Where are you going? -I see how this goes.

First we vote on who can eat, then on who we are going to eat.

-Just stay. -Just stay?

Can't you choose for yourself for once, Yesmay?

I'm choosing for myself now.

Elias?!

Today is another beautiful day to go hunting.

I can feel it! The island will give bountiful to us today.

And a new system will come into effect.

You all earn tokens based on what you provide to the group.

Food. Clothing. Entertainment.

The more tokens, the more you eat.

Thymen came up with this great idea, so he has immunity for the next round.

Bitches!

This means that he can take a bit from each of your meals.

What?

-Congratulations, Thymen. -Thanks.

And more one more thing. I want to see you make an effort.

Give me more energy and a lot more grit!

-And, action! -Yeah, very nice. Great.

Okay, let's go!

-I'm really proud of us. -Yes.

Now we move on to the official ceremony in which we divide the tokens.

Pauline and Kahnil both get…

five tokens, for picking fruit. Well done.

Thymen and I each receive seven tokens for fortifying the camp.

Yes.

What about me?

You should try a bit harder. I saw you being a diva.

-You spent the whole day on the beach. -I've been fishing.

You call this fish?

-Yes. -Okay.

You get two tokens.

Alrighty, let's see…

That's a nice piece. Let's see. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.

Yes, the middle one. Yummy. Thanks.

-Look at this. -That's a good portion, Thymen.

-Enjoy, guys. -Let's eat.

So good, this. Oh man.

I thought we wouldn't find anything…

-Where are you going? -I'm going to find Elias.

We're getting off this island.

I'm sorry.

Yeah…

I'm sorry for being such a shit all the time.

It's because of the hunger, I think. And the island. And… Rutger.

And I think I just miss a little… a little warmth.

A little love.

Affection.

I can get you more water. More food. More tokens.

-I'm not going to sleep with you. -Yesmay, hey…

Everyone here knows you story. How you fuck your way to the top.

And then with me, you to act like you're too good for that?

Listen.

The only reason girls sleep with you is because of your fame.

Not for who you are or what you have to say.

They just want a good story.

And you say you don't want to settle down, but of all those girls you've slept with,

not one wants a future with you.

That's why you're here alone.

Elias.

Elias.

Elias?

Elias.

Elias?

I saw something.

-They filmed the German version here. -Insel der Lust?

Das Villa von Verleidung.

You dirty slut! I'll fuck you up!

Estelle!

-Oh, and… -Edwin.

They've gone all Blue Lagoon.

You said we were the only ones and had to reproduce?

Shut up!

I'm so glad there are more people.

An orgy!

Yes, there was nothing to eat at all…

-They are spacing. -…pills and magic mushrooms.

-So we were like, yeah… Why not? -Yes.

Oh, we used all the condoms, so if you still wanted…

-Once I get going… -You're so dirty.

Elias.

Yes, the Germans add a little bit more sex.

We are trying to get off this fucking island.

Well, there is one thing…

The German team used this to bring in supplies.

When the show was canceled, they just left it behind.

-Okay… -Forget it.

I gave up after hours of tinkering. It just won't work.

I'm sorry, Estelle, for not telling you.

That's okay. My father was a mechanic.

I grew up in his garage.

-Give me a 32. -A what?

-A 32. -This one?

-No, the other one. -This?

Yes.

-A 17. -A 17…

Okay, try it!

Monkey wrench.

Start the engine!

-Have a nice trip. -You're not coming?

No. Boats aren't really my thing.

-Mine either. -No.

Okay. We'll send a rescue team for you.

The island will decide. Who will be tonight's dinner?

Pauline.

Thank you. Sit.

Elias.

Thymen.

Rutger.

Come on…

-Rutger… -Hey, this is insane.

The almighty ultra-joker has chosen you.

-You are my Turtles. -Three, two, one…

-No! -Action!

Eli, man.

-We can get off this island. -What?

We have a working boat. And you can come along.

Beyond the forest, on the east coast.

And we found the cameraman. And Estelle.

Since when is this Lord of the Flies?

Ah, since we've made soup from these mushrooms.

And Pauline and I took power this morning.

Immunity!

No, shit!

Shit!

Yesmay!

-What a bummer, huh, Rutger? -I'm sorry, Yesmay.

I'm sorry.

I was afraid that I would lose control of you guys.

But the only thing I lost…

was my self-control.

Audio guy…

You're always so pessimistic, audio guy.

Rutger!

Ha, the useless child star is back.

How lonely is it to never really be seen by anyone?

You're so weak!

Are you okay?

Yes?

You think you can get away with this?

Look at that cloud.

That's a helicopter.

We are saved.

Sometimes the world seems like a very lonely place.

And in our desire to be seen, we desperately seek connection.

Acceptance, love.

We do everything to be seen by everybody,

but not everyone needs to see you.

You really only need one person.