All language subtitles for Dan Da Dan S01E01 (Awafim.tv)

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Huh?

I said, if you ain't lendin' me money, then no date today.

Oh, but I'd be okay if you finally put out instead.

You'll pay for the love hotel, though.

You need to be punched!

Why you little...

You're full of it!

I've had enough of you!

Yer broke and ya ain't puttin' out! Get lost!

Gimme a break, moron!

Octopus! Squid! Tuna!

Totes funny!

Seafood names aren't insults.

Come on, comfort me! He was my first boyfriend.

That's why I told you to not go for him.

What was so good about him, anyway?

He looked like Ken Takakura.

- Oh, there you go. - You're so annoying.

Nothing wrong with that! I like masculine guys like Ken Takakura!

"I am an awkward fellow, after all."

Dudes like that are extinct.

What the heck.

Will I not be able to meet another Mr. Ken in my lifetime?

Come on, someone comfort me!

Such a cruel world.

- Damn it! - You missed?

- I did miss. - Don't look over here. Gross.

- We have this, too. - Nice.

Put a magnet inside.

This'll hurt, won't it?

What are you reading there?

Oh? Uh, um...

BIRTH OF THE AEROSPACE SELF-DEFENSE FORCE GUARDING OUTER SPACE!!

How lame.

Do only scum live in this world?

Man, I've had enough.

Where can I relieve all this stress?

Miss Momo Ayase!

- I know you're in love! - Huh?

I know you're in love!

How many times you gonna say that?

Someone like Miss Ayase talking to me? That's gotta be the only reason!

Maybe you got the wrong idea?

It's not like I wanna get chummy with you or anything.

Forget all that earlier.

This is what I'm talking about!

The President has already gone to Mars! What is the entirety of Project Pegasus?!

Huh? What?

You're a fan of the occult!

Oh, I don't believe in UFOs or aliens or stuff like that.

I'm not talking about a UFO, but a UAP!

Unidentified Aerial Phenomena!

Hey, you're being a pest.

The U.S. military has officially acknowledged the existence of UAPs

and reformed the Space Force!

Japan has also newly created an Aerospace Self-Defense Force!

Any way you look at it, they're getting ready for Space Wars!

Can I go now?

What?

No, wait! This has the newest image of Nessie, too. Here!

It also talks about Lieutenant Colonel Jim Channon and Skinwalker Ranch!

Shut up!

I just got dumped so I don't want any of this.

How you push stuff at me is so typical of otaku and really annoying!

That's why you have no friends!

Don't talk to me like you know me.

Sorry, that was a bit much.

YOUR TRUE POWERS AND POTENTIAL HAVE YET TO AWAKEN...

Here.

I don't believe in aliens.

But I do believe in ghosts.

Oh no, there's no such thing as ghosts.

I matched the conversation topic to yours, but you outright deny that?!

Don't you mock the occult!

Just so you know, my grandma is a spirit medium.

What?

Have you ever seen an exorcism? It's really wicked!

The possessed person goes into convulsions!

You can go into convulsions from illness, too.

It's not proof that ghosts are out there.

Then have you ever had an alien let you ride a UFO?!

Your logic is jumping too far! Are you an idiot?!

Huh?

She gave up on Ken Takakura and went after an otaku?

Look. It's like she doesn't care what other people would think.

Can't say I hate it.

Then let's have a contest, dammit!

If there really are ghosts, you'll be serving me as a gofer!

I'll show you UFOs, I mean, UAPs!

If you're able to see one, M-Miss Ayase, you'll be my gofer instead!

NAGI GENERAL HOSPITAL

OCCULT-KUN

What is this place? It's way too scary!

What part of this is a UFO hotspot?

They call that Nagi Hospital a sanctuary for UFOs!

If you call for a UFO on the roof, you will experience an Abduction!

What's an Abduction?

That's when an alien kidnaps you and experiments with your body.

Wait, hold on! Have you been experimented on before?!

There is a chance that I have!

Huh?

Many people who experience an Abduction have their memories erased.

Hey, you. You've never seen a UFO before, have you?

Do you know about regressive hypnosis?

Don't change the subject on me.

It's not an issue of whether or not you've seen one!

The point is whether or not there's proper proof that they exist!

Shut up!

Anyway, how are things on your end?

I have arrived.

KEEP OUT

At the spiritual hotspot.

Now, I'll go and prove it right now...

that there are no such things as ghosts!

Hey, you aren't freaking out, are you?

By the way,

that spot is famous on the 'net for something definitely being there.

Too shy, shy boy, in this moment!

They say speaking loudly is the most dangerous thing to do.

Too shy, shy boy...

On the 'net.

You've been mentioning the 'net a lot.

So have you seen a ghost, Miss Ayase?

Nope.

What?

How dare you talk so authoritatively earlier!

My bad!

Take back that attitude you've been giving me!

It's absurd that you've never seen a ghost but believe in them!

It's not absurd.

I told you my grandma's a spirit medium.

I love my grandma a lot since I don't have parents.

Oh, I see.

Why are you getting all meek and stuff?

Get a load of this. My family is seriously weird.

I always had to perform

a good luck ritual before stepping outside.

I was always forced to do it the entire way to school.

And of course, I was the laughingstock of all the boys.

If I don't do it, Grandma got pissed. It was the pits.

But the toughest part of it all...

was when the boy I liked made fun of me.

I really hated my grandma.

"Because of that weird ritual, the boy I like hates me."

I think I said something horrible like that to Grandma.

Since then,

I didn't talk to Grandma until recently, and I stopped doing the ritual.

But you know,

I get pissed when someone else makes fun of my family.

That's when I realized...

I didn't hate the fact that the boy I liked didn't like me.

I hated the fact that the boy I liked made fun of my grandma.

In reality, I loved both Grandma and her job as a spirit medium,

because it felt special.

How she decided to take me in, and lovingly raised me all by herself...

I have faith in my grandma.

That's why I believe in ghosts.

So anyway, why do you believe in aliens?

That really doesn't matter, right?

What's with that? You don't have any reasons?

Do you need a reason to like something?

Well, you have a point.

More like, Occult-kun, you sure talk bluntly over the phone.

I-Is that so?

Miss Ayase, you're pretty easy to talk to.

I'll let you suckle my teats, so...

lemme gobble that weenie.

Ghost!

Hold on! You shouldn't run there!

Hey, Occult-kun!

No way! Impossible!

- That was just an ordinary granny! - Oc... kun...

- Stop right now! - That's it.

- Just an ordinary granny! - They say on the 'net she's bad news!

I'm pretty sure I misunderstood something.

I simply bumped into a lewd granny!

They say you can't let her outrun you at any cost!

If you lose a race against Turbo Granny, you'll be cursed!

OCCULT-KUN

Hey, Occult-kun! Are you listening?

Hello? Answer me!

You're kidding me, right?

I'll head over there right now! Just hang on!

What are those things? Seriously, cut it out.

Hello, woman person.

We are Serpoians. We are called that because we come from the planet Serpo.

Aliens?

Don't be afraid. We are a friendly people.

Friendly guys don't strip girls naked, you know!

Where are my clothes?

We have taken proper care of your belongings.

They're all tattered! Pay for damages!

And I wanna go home, so can you take this off?

Our kind only has males.

Thus, we reproduce through clone technology.

Are you even listening?

However, identical units do not instigate biological evolution.

Conflict, as well as basic emotions, were annihilated.

Therefore, for us to regain reproductive function similar to humans,

we want your "bananas."

We will now have sex.

After having sex with you, we will extract your uterus and your banana for research.

Gimme a break!

I did date a douchebag, but I didn't let him take my virginity!

My chastity has been saved for a Ken Takakura I have yet to meet!

No way some creepy alien is gonna take it from me!

In order to arouse your desire,

we will use psychokinesis to control your brain waves.

How is it? Isn't the temperature of your body getting warmer?

What's this? She is resisting the psychokinesis.

What incredible spiritual power.

However...

Let us begin.

No...

Stop!

A phone call?

Someone sure has a really bad sense of timing.

Miss Ayase! I'm sorry!

There was a ghost!

Turbo Granny has cursed me!

Occult-kun! I'm glad! Can you help me?

Who are you?

Infiltrating using a smartphone. Not even we have technology like that.

Please help! I can't control myself!

Lemme gobble that weenie!

Come on, get a grip!

Man person over there.

We did not authorize your intrusion.

Leave immediately, or else...

Please give us your banana.

Gross!

Six Sense Organs!

So fast! I cannot set my psychokinesis.

Our cherished bananas!

You banana thief!

Serpoian Form Serpo-Grammetry!

Occult-kun!

We have never encountered someone so aggressive.

We have an amiable relationship with humans. So give us your bananas.

I'll give it to you! Anything if it's mine!

I've been wanting to see aliens for the longest time!

Because I didn't have any friends,

I thought at least aliens would be my friends.

I've been calling to the skies for a UFO since grade school!

But you never came!

No matter how much I called for you, you never showed up!

Other humans bullied me to pass their time.

Aliens didn't give me the time of day.

Nobody ever acknowledged my existence.

But Miss Ayase...

She actually stood up for me, despite that!

So don't you lay a finger on her!

I won't allow anyone to hurt her!

If it's for her sake, I'll even become a monster!

Keep at it, Occult-kun!

Show 'em what a man you are!

Fie!

Miss Ayase...

It looks impossible after all.

You gave up really fast there!

We cannot become friends with a violent person like you.

Besides, we like woman persons more than man persons.

Now, once again, I shall arouse your desire.

Take your chi out.

I don't wanna.

My friends make fun of me every single day because of that.

What are you talking about?

If you have your chi out, you won't get hurt or sick.

Bad things can't get near you.

First, firm up your lower abs.

Imagine having your chi shoot up from the top of your head.

She's doing it again!

Is she communicating with aliens or something?

I hate it! I'm never doing it again!

Momo! Hold on!

I hate you, Grandma! You fake spirit medium!

Why am I remembering the past right now?

I'm sorry, Grandma. I just felt embarrassed back then.

Firm up your lower abs.

Chi shoot up from the top of your head.

No way!

What?

Miss Ayase, you can use psychic powers?

Well, I'm surprised by that myself!

Unbelievable! My psychokinesis is being pushed back!

Why?

Did I stimulate her brain waves too much

and cause the woman person's chakra to open up?

She was for real.

Grandma was a real spirit medium!

Thank you, Grandma!

With this, I can take those scumbags...

and send them flying!

What is this? That was a UFO?

Occult-kun, are you okay?

Let's get outta here!

Ow! What are you doing, idiot! Regain your sanity already!

Damn you!

Turbo Granny?

Who the hell are you?

His curse hasn't lifted!

Granny is out of his body, though!

I have possession of that kid's weenie.

As long as I have his weenie, that kid's curse won't be lifted.

If you want it back, come to the tunnel.

This place is too far for me.

I'll take you on as much as you want if it's in the tunnel, gaudy hag.

Who you calling a gaudy hag, you old bag of crap!

Give him back his thingy!

Crap! If we don't escape, we're gonna die!

Get a grip, you idiot! We're gonna escape!

This is the worst.

I'll believe in aliens. Like, I was kidnapped and all.

I'll believe in ghosts, too. I got cursed after all.

So, what should we do from here?

What should we do?

You lose control of yourself if I don't hold the curse back with psychic powers.

I'm sorry.

I lost my uniform, my wallet, my smartphone. Everything.

How can I lift this curse?

You have to beat the crap out of Turbo Granny.

She's the cause of the curse.

I see. Then I'll head on over there.

Huh? Right now?

Miss Ayase, please wear my clothes back home.

Hold on! You'll lose control without me!

All of this happened because of what I did.

I can't get you involved in it anymore, Miss Ayase.

I'll use willpower to make it to the tunnel,

and then make it work somehow.

Why can't you ask me to come with you?

After that experience earlier, I can't leave you alone!

You would've died earlier if I wasn't around!

Is it okay for you to help someone like me?

Stuff like that is such a hassle.

Come on, put some clothes on.

Let's go!

I'm sorry.

I am an awkward fellow, after all.

Miss Ayase, please put some clothes on.

If you don't, I can't bring myself to speak properly.

No way. Why is my heart racing?

This can't be.

I was just surprised because he happened to recite one of Ken Takakura's lines.

I need to calm down for now.

By the way, what's your name?

I'm terrible at remembering names.

Oh? Um...

I'm Ken Takakura.

Aliens really did exist!

Ghosts exist, too!

The existence of aliens and ghosts being proven means that

there's a possibility of supernatural phenomena, UMA,

and all other things that were said to be absurd can be proven as well.

Oh, fine, I get it! Ready.

Next episode, "That's a Space Alien, Ain't It?!"

Hey, be in sync with me!

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