All language subtitles for Children.of.the.Cult.2024.1080p.WEB.h264-CODSWALLOP

So much old stuff.

Oh, look, here you can see
all the communes in Europe.

Here, here, here, here.

UK, I count, like, 12, 15.

Netherlands.
Everywhere, they had the communes.

That's me on the ranch.
Dressed in red.

Here are the notes I got...

..in the message box
in the Amsterdam commune.

This one says, "Beloved Chandra,
you're such a sweetheart,

"and your body is so beautiful."

And this one is written by
a German guy in his 30s, I think.

"Beloved Chandra,
it is beautiful to be with you.

"I love to sleep with you,
to feel your body, it's amazing.

"Kisses."

I'd find messages of adult men
saying something about

how lovely it was to sleep with me.

And how old were you then?
I was 13.

But it was normal.

I don't have any other words for it.

My name is Maroesja.

I was six years old
when I was initiated into a cult

and became known as Chandra.

INDISTINCT CHANTING

My mother chose to become one
of tens of thousands

of followers of the Indian guru
Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh.

Children like me
didn't get a choice.

The cult became our entire world.

40 years on, I've connected

with other kids who grew up
in its communes.

In Britain, in America,
and around the world.

Until now, the truth
of what happened to us,

in a movement that still thrives
today, has been kept hidden.

Together,
we've decided to change that.

I was born in Weston-super-Mare.

I was about six years old.

My dad went off to India
and then said,

"It's amazing!
Everybody has to come!"

And sent all our family out there,
together, is how it started.

Coming out the plane,

it was just this hit of hot,
thick, India-smelling air.

And just being surrounded
by little children,

all smiling at me and putting
their hands in my pockets

and pulling on my toys.

And when we got to the ashram,

I remember people streaming in
with orange and red.

And there was just so many people.

I actually felt quite overwhelmed
and started crying.

And then this girl came to me,

and she said, "Don't worry,
I'll take care of you."

And she took me off into the ashram.

In the late '70s, followers
of the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh

were flocking to his spiritual
commune in Pune in India.

Walking in,
it was serene, it was peaceful.

I was 23 by then, so I was young,
and bright-eyed, and, you know...

Most followers didn't arrive
with family or children.

They were young,
affluent Westerners like Erin,

who came from California.

My father was
a very successful businessman.

Being part of the rich and famous
world, to some extent,

I really got a chance to see
how having money

didn't really give access
to happiness.

And I was seeking,
always, from being really young,

I was looking for answers,
I was looking for authenticity

because I didn't find it
in my close world.

I was transported into
another reality, really.

The people seemed so happy.

They seemed like they had a secret
that nobody else had.

Everybody was saying
it was his energy.

"Wait till you meet him,
wait till you see him."

We were all waiting for him to come.

There was a power in it.

He was this little man
in a little white robe.

My experience was so profound,

I thought I had met...

..like, a saviour.

If you were living in the commune
and you were a kid,

you were treated special because
we didn't have all the conditioning

from the outside world,
so we were closer to enlightenment.

I remember kneeling in front of him
and he said,

"Your name will be Ma Prem Sargam."

Ma is for "woman", Prem is "love",
and Sargam means "music".

We were completely free,
just not contained at all.

Using Pune
as our playground, basically.

CHILDREN CHATTERING

Did you have any idea at the time,
when you were seven,

what the adults were actually doing?

Yes, absolutely.
It was about meditation.

You know, my mum meditated.
Worked and meditated all day long.

We did the dynamic meditation,
you know,

which is a lot of catharsis
and special breathing,

which is hyperventilating,

and then jumping up and down,
yelling, "Whoo!"

And dancing, and the different
stages of the meditation.

MAN SHOUTING

I was really open at first,
and then I suddenly pulled back in

and was like,
"Uh-oh, this is a little weird."

Because everybody's dressed alike
and they're all wearing these beads,

and I called it "group-mind".

I thought, "I'm afraid
there's a group-mind going on here

"that's not healthy,
that's not safe."

And I thought, "Whoa,
I'm gonna be very careful here."

But what everybody was saying,
and what he was saying,

was that we had to throw out
all of our doubts,

our fears, our mistrust.

That those were all in the way
of attaining a spiritual clarity.

With that teaching over and over
and over again,

I fell deeper and deeper

into a state of what I believed
was surrender to him.

And I remember very soon
having the feeling

I would do anything for him,
everything for him.

Followers also took part

in what Bhagwan described
as "therapy groups"

to rid themselves of the
conditioning of the outside world.

Our groups were underground,
the walls were padded,

and it was also nicknamed
the Dungeon.

In 1981, a German film-maker
gained access to the Dungeon.

SHOUTING AND WAILING
His explicit and revealing film

captured followers
at their most uncontained.

In some of the groups,
there were no rules - anything goes.

I began to see a lot
of boundaries being broken,

sexually and also
in terms of violence.

People were all
beating each other up,

I mean punching each other hard.

And then I turn around
and somebody's raping a woman,

and she's fighting to get away,
and another man holds her down.

I was told that it was necessary,

even the violence was necessary,
to break down the barriers.

So I got used to things
that didn't feel right,

and I got used to just assuming
that they were right.

By now, Bhagwan was becoming famous
as "the sex guru".

He rejected monogamy and
the traditional family structure.

Sexual freedom was everything.

We were encouraged
to watch people having sex.

Adults were told it was all right.

"Children should watch us
having sex."

So, it became almost like a game
for us

to hear somebody having sex
around the place and...

go and watch.

And a child seeing this over
and over and over again,

it sexualises the child
and normalises sexual behaviour.

So from there, you know,
we were sitting on guards' laps

and French kissing them
in front of the community.

In front of the community.

You can't say it looks all right

to have a seven-year-old
sitting on your lap doing that.

And that progressed
to more sexual acts.

My mother and I lived as followers
in the Netherlands.

I remember being bullied at school
because of my red clothes.

As Bhagwan's message spread
around the world,

communes opened
in more than 50 countries.

There were more than 30,000
followers, known as Sannyasins.

Hello, Leela.

MUFFLED: Oh, good to meet you
in person.

Yes, it is.

'Leela was 11 when her parents took
her to a commune in Switzerland.'

This is in the Zurich commune.

As a Sannyas child,
because we grew up so freely,

you were expected that
we would become ready for sex

or wanting to have sex
at a very young age.

So as a girl, if you behaved,
like, flirty or sexy, you know,

and outgoing,
you were being a good Sannyas child.

And if you were more,
like, introverted and shy,

you were a bad Sannyas child, so...

Which kind were you?

Oh, second.
SHE CHUCKLES

I was... I was... I felt...

I felt pressured. Like, you know,
"You should be different."

I should be more extroverted,

and outgoing, and sexy, and...

I knew how sex works, but I...

..I couldn't really
picture myself in that.

It was like sex was so over-present
in our everyday life.

In our shared bathrooms,
there was, big bowls with condoms.

Then we were, like,
doing striptease,

or we had one kid's mum,

she wanted to make a beauty contest
of our genitals.

So we had to march naked, and she
would choose the prettiest one.

And, "You have the prettiest..."
you know, "..genital."

When you grow up like that,
I always thought, like,

"OK, that's fine, it's good,
it's normal, and we live like this."

I... I didn't think
there was anything wrong with it.

Communes were also opening
in the UK.

One of the biggest was in Suffolk,
it was called Medina.

Rosalind moved to Medina
with her parents in 1981.

I thought it was wonderful at first.

Lovely, open space,
private grounds, lots of people.

This is Medina, set in
the lovely Suffolk countryside.

The cult made its own shiny PR video
to attract new followers.

It's happening in every country
in Europe,

it's happening in every country
in the world.

Suddenly, we're all together,

and it feels just like being
in the ashram.

The video paints a genteel image

of Bhagwan's utopia,
while concealing the reality...

We were working 12-hour days.

We worked very hard.
And you were, at that time...?

14, 15, maybe I was already 15.

So, this man
had taken an interest in me,

and I didn't want
to have sex with him.

And, for once,
I was quite clear about that.

I kept saying no,

but he kept pursuing me,
chasing me to have sex with him.

Then there was a really lovely,
motherly woman.

and I remember sitting against her,
and her arms around me,

and I was talking
about this problem with her.

And her gentle, womanly advice
to me was to let him...

have me once,
and then he'd lose interest.

And... so I began to think
that was what I would have to do.

One evening, I found him in my bed,
waiting for me.

I think it kind of crossed my mind,
the fact that my mum was...

room was just across the landing,

but it didn't really occur to me
to go and ask her for help.

So I got undressed
and got into bed with him

because I didn't see another way.

And even then
I didn't know it was rape.

SOBS: And I didn't cry at the time.
I didn't know...

..really, how bad it was.
INHALES SHARPLY

And the horror for me of that
is that the whole commune was aware

of what was going on.

It went on for weeks.

And people were talking about it,

and not one person said anything
supportive to me...

..and that includes my parents.

I just find it really hard
to get my head around that.

INHALES
AND EXHALES SHARPLY

# Kookaburra sits
In the old gum tree

# Merry, merry king
Of the bush is he

# Laugh, kookaburra
Laugh, kookaburra

# That's not a monkey, that's me! #

I actually thought
this is what happened to every kid.

You don't know that it doesn't

because it's the only experience
that you have as a child.

I think it was an attraction,
you know, this free sex,

and, also, free sex with kids, too.

Do you know what I mean?
You're not gonna get stopped.

And if you're a predator,
what a great environment to go in.

Do you remember this?
This is our school.

That's what our school
used to look like, actually.

Hem Hera.
Hem Hera, yeah.

That's my friend's
eighth birthday party.

That's Sharna, our teacher.

Where are you?
And I'm here.

But Sharna was always present.

Hem Hera was our school,

and Sharna was our headteacher.

He was a very, very charismatic man
that all the Sannyasins loved.

He was very theatrical and fun.

And it was known
that he was a paedophile.

It was common knowledge.

We used to have singing circles
in the commune.

I had seen him getting handjobs
from other children,

and when he gave us piggybacks,
he would shove his fingers up us.

He was in a relationship
with a child there.

Everybody knew.

That's why it's so disturbing

that he became our headteacher
in the other communes.

LEELA: One day, we were taken
to the train station...

..and sent to England.

One of the English commune
was going to be our school,

the Rajneesh School.

CHILDREN SHOUTING

In 1983,
the cult converted Medina,

the commune in Suffolk,
into a boarding school.

Children from communes
around the world

were sent there alone

so their parents could pursue
their spiritual journeys

without distraction.

There were little kids,

starting from age one
and up to teenagers.

At that time,
I was, like, 11 and 12.

I was just really overwhelmed.

And the first couple of weeks I was
there, I was hiding on the attic.

Sharna features heavily
in the Medina PR video.

He's cast as an entertainer,
playing the clown,

sometimes naked,

and portrayed as a teacher,
who can be trusted around children.

# Most efficacious in every case. #

There was a teacher called Sharna,

and he was a very popular
and very charismatic and funny guy.

He flirted with a lot of girls,
and also with younger girls.

There was a girl, she was maybe...

I don't know, eight? Seven, eight.

He liked to have her on his lap
and tickle her

and kind of flirt with her,
and she was always sort of laughing,

but also looking little bit...

..unhappy.

I sensed, like,
I was getting a double message.

SARGAM: I had to go back to England
by myself, and I was ten.

And I didn't know when I was gonna
see my parents again. At all.

Sharna took a few of us,
made it a game.

Told us to take our clothes off,

sit on top of a Xerox machine

and took pictures
of our private parts,

spread them around the men.

I could do with
a cigarette break now. Yeah.

Cos I'm starting to shake.
I was just going to ask you...

Oh, my God!
..how you were feeling.

I was also sent to Medina.

I worked long hours
in the kitchen...

..cooking for the babies
and children

that were living there
without their mothers.

My mother was asked to sign
a consent form

for me to be given contraception.

I was 13.

It started as a neglect.

It's not that the women,

including your mother,
were neglectful mother.

They became neglectful mother

because they were brainwashed,
they were under a spell.

They thought that the price
for a spiritual life

was to relinquish the children.

Deeksha was a member
of Bhagwan's inner circle

in the commune in India.

It was her job to see
that Bhagwan's orders

were carried out without question.

As well as separating children
from their parents,

Bhagwan promoted other ways
to undermine the family unit.

He didn't want children
in the ashram

because children are a disturbance.

And that's why he suggested
the sterilisation.

ERIN: He talked about how children

were a total impediment
to enlightenment.

Suddenly,
everybody was getting sterilised.

And the closer you were
to the centre around him,

the more people
were getting sterilised.

People can make love
without the fear of having children,

and it free you, in a way.

The office will give me a list
that tomorrow

this doctor can do four vasectomy
and three sterilisation.

And I will call people and say,

"Bhagwan want us to get sterilised,
so we say, what about you?"

You know? "OK. Are you ready?"

Then we'll put the name down.
That's how it happened.

ERIN: I think I was just 25,
barely 25,

and my... tubes had been cut.

I remember feeling,
"This is a mark of true devotion."

And I was too young
to make a choice like that.

This was kind of peer pressure,
also.

I knew of somebody who was underage
who did it,

who was very young, in her teen.

She was 14.

Course I regret it.
I mean, it's absurd.

You know, how stupid. I mean, how...

..how damaging,
to do something like that.

Bhagwan's followers
had searched for freedom,

but some say they found a system
of control and exploitation.

Both Deeksha and Erin
say they were chosen

for one-to-one sessions
with the guru.

We had special dresses to wear

that were gathered above the breasts
and open.

No underwear.

Oh, you know...

I mean, here, I would...
if I say this to you,

I am breaking every vow of secrecy
that we were to hold.

I just wanna take a break
for a second.

Sure, of course.

DEEKSHA: In his bedroom,
there were two beds.

So when he wanted to, you know,
have a private section with you,

he will close the door and lock it.

He will say, "Close your eyes,

"take your robe, lie on the bed,

"open your leg,

"touch your breast, masturbate."

He would stand up,
and he would come to me from behind.

He did weird things,

often with putting his hands
in my mouth and down my throat.

He always... pleased himself,
and as soon as he did,

the minute he did,
he'd tell me to leave.

I think he was smart enough
to identify the woman who,

as me, I was kind of naive,
I was very protected in my life,

I never had to struggle, in a way.

How often did this happen to you?

Several time.
I don't know the number.

I was, what... for a period.
It happened several time. Yeah.

ERIN: I believed it was a privilege,

and that something was happening
beyond my understanding.

It wasn't till years later
when I realised that every time...

Like now, I'm shaking. Every time
I wanted to talk about it,

my body would just quiver,
quiver, quiver, you know?

And, uh...

Eurgh. Makes me sick.

We drove up Highway 5, up to Oregon.

There was a lot of country roads,
like, to get all the way out there,

cos it was quite... quite rural.

MAROESJA PERIZONIUS:
In the early 1980s,

Bhagwan's cult
was expanding rapidly.

He bought a 60,000-acre ranch

in a remote part of Oregon,
in America,

to build a super-commune.

Dickon was 12 when he arrived
with his mother.

This white one right in front of us
was the old ranch house. Yeah.

That little...

Was that little one Howdy Doody?

I remember, we pull up,

and somebody said to go to what I
then learnt was called Howdy Doody.

It was this barn
next to the main ranch house

that had been turned into
a kids' dorm.

From the point that I arrived
on that first day,

and I went off in this direction
and my mum went off

in this direction,
we never lived together again, ever.

Followers came
from all over the world

to help build
what was called Rajneeshpuram.

But this looks different.

Yes.
This used to be a little stream.

I remember playing there.

I came here, too, aged 11.

It felt like we were building
a real city,

complete with its own police force
and airline.

Local news channels
appeared to see the cult's arrival

as a bit of an oddity.

REPORTER: Antelope, Oregon was
typical small-town, rustic America.

But now the streets of Antelope
are lined with red -

Rajneeshee children,
Rajneeshee adults,

and Indian guru
Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh

daily driving through town
in one of his 30 Rolls-Royces.

ALL: # La-la-la, hey!

# La-la-la-la-la-la-la... #

The cult overwhelmed the local town.

They bought up houses
and took over the school.

It really is quiet, huh?
Yeah.

'Forty years later,
Antelope is like a ghost town.'

Hello.
Hi! Hello!

Come on in.
So nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.
You are John.

I am John, you are right.

'John Silvertooth was the mayor
of Antelope at the time.'

Good to meet you today.

'There aren't many of us left around
that were here.'

I mean, I'm the only one
in this town that was here.

But I really like to hear
your experiences,

because, you know, we all suspected

that the children were in danger,
you know?

I mean, everybody felt that.

I mean, you didn't have to look
very deeply

to see how they were treated.

Even if there wasn't sexual abuse,

it wasn't right to separate kids
from their parents like that.

Yeah.
Yeah.

I was here only three months.

And it was just really hard
even to find my mother,

because everybody was dressed
in the same colour. Right.

I had an A-frame in one mountain,

and she had another A-frame
somewhere,

and we just didn't run into
each other during those months.

Yeah. Crazy.
Yeah, yeah.

This is the conflict within me
and the struggle within me,

that's been part of my struggle
my whole life,

is balancing the good and the bad.

We had some things
that were really good,

and we had some things,
quite a lot of things,

that were really, really bad.
Yeah. Yeah.

That's the thing that's always
so confusing.

I... I don't find that unusual.

It's, like, you know,
you still love the abusive parent

even after they beat you
with a two-by-four.

They're still Mommy or Daddy,
you know? Yeah.

But this story about child abuse
is very important, I think,

because there are many,
many victims,

and I've heard the victims ignored
for so long, you know?

I just think, you know,
those poor kids.

Kids weren't just separated
from their parents on the ranch.

Some, like Sarito,
arrived entirely on their own.

I got off the Greyhound bus
with my, like, Indian summer dress,

you know,
probably a little tiny suitcase

and flip flops,
and, like, crazy hippie hair.

And everyone's wearing, like,
Wrangler jeans and cowboy boots,

and I could tell
that I looked like a freak.

I was put in this bunkhouse -

13 men, one boy and me.

All the beds were out in the open.

And I was going through puberty,
right? I was 12.

I think coming to the ranch
on my own, before my mother,

set me up perfectly to be...
targeted.

Most of the followers on the ranch
were single, young adults.

Milarepa joined the cult
in the early days in India

and was a prominent member
of the new commune.

I think he was probably, like,
late 20s at the time.

He lived in Howdy Doody.

I didn't really pay attention
to him except that he played music.

He started just showing interest
in me, you know,

just like he seemed
to almost care about my wellbeing.

He invited me to a poker game,
and I said, "Sure."

Like, I felt flattered
to be invited.

He had me sit next to him,

and he just kind of got
really close.

He put his hand around me,

and then he started just putting
his arm down my shirt.

I remember feeling confused.

There was probably four or five
other guys, nobody said anything.

So this happened
maybe two or three times.

But then he invited me to a party.

He pulled me away from the group,
and we were on the ground,

and he started feeling me up
and making out with me.

After that party,
he invited me home with him.

And so that night,
he took my virginity.

Yeah, I was 12.

I mean, the one thing
that did come to mind

right after I lost my virginity was,
like... I gave it away.

You know, I felt like I...

gave away my goodness...

..to someone who didn't deserve it.
That's the thing.

Everything just seemed,
sexually, it was so casual.

It was purely just this activity
everybody participated in.

God, I haven't thought of this
in a long time.

I was 14.

I was terribly shy.

She was older,
she was late 20s, early 30s.

A couple of times,
we ended up kissing, and...

..one night,
she invited me to her home.

I wanted to be with her.

So I spent the night with her,
we had sex.

The following day, I was kind of
heady and excited and happy,

and... and then...

that following day,

she ended up sleeping with
my best friend.

One or two days after that,

she slept with somebody else
who was our age.

There was some celebration,

and I saw her kissing
or dancing or hugging

this other guy
that she'd slept with.

And I just burst into tears.

People all around,
and people are dancing,

and music's playing,

and I'm just standing there
just crying.

This is one of the things
that I was worried about

in doing this... this project.
Mm-hm.

Like, I'm telling this story...

..and to me, all of a sudden,
it doesn't seem so dramatic.

But at the same time,
it's such a indicator

of the culture that all us children
were raised in,

where, basically, anything goes,

as long as it's kept quiet
to the outside world.

Amazing how much materials...
Yeah. Yeah.

'The Oregon State Archives
hold a huge collection of artefacts

'and journalism about the ranch.'

Oh, Jesus.
"Bhagwan's Child-Rearing."

Just that title.
Ugh.

'We could only find one article

'that relates to the experience
of children.'

"The children are discouraged
from living with their parents."

Not discouraged,
we weren't allowed to.

There was no choice.
There was no choice.

Yeah, there was no...
We had no say in it.

"Most of the 12, 13
and 14-year-old girls at the ranch

"were having sexual relationships.

"It was a common thing."
Yep. Yep?

When was this article written?

Uh... this was published May, 1985.

Oh, Jesus Christ...
I'd like to hear more.

" 'I'm a child protective
social worker,'

"explains a former disciple
of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh.

"She told Oregon magazine that,

" 'Just from a sociological
point of view, in my opinion,

" 'there's a tremendous amount
of child neglect

" 'going on there
at Rajneeshpuram.' "

Oh.

HE SOBS
Sorry.

It's so weird.

Yeah.

It's like that.
This stuff is, like...

There's so much pain
that's just beneath the surface.

That loneliness, that lostness.

It just hurts, it just hurts.
I get it.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

This is just kind of
blowing my mind.

In '85?
That this was published in '85.

Yeah. It's taken this long
for it to come out,

but it was here
in black and white in 1985.

The author of the article
was Win McCormack.

He was one of the only journalists
raising questions

about what was actually going on
at the ranch.

I had a couple of reliable sources
tell me that...

adults at the ranch, Rajneeshpuram,

were having sex with underage girls
and that it was very common.

One man was sitting next
to this girl on a bus

and started molesting her,
right there in public.

You must have been the only one
writing about that.

Yes, I... I was.

And there was a certain number
of journalists

who dismissed what I'd written.

Maybe thought it was exaggerated.
I mean, it was actually...

It went way beyond
what I had found out.

You know, it wasn't just
a few people at Rajneeshpuram,

it was probably a lot of people
at Rajneeshpuram.

But it also included people
all around the world

at Rajneesh centres,
from Europe to Australia.

And I never had a clue as to that -

that it was that widespread
and that much a part of the culture.

That it was, you know,
it was part of the culture.

Until recently,
people hardly knew anything

about our lives
in the Rajneesh communes.

Everybody felt they were there
at the beginning

of the great experiment,
like we were the chosen people.

That changed
with a high-profile Netflix series,

released in 2018.

Over six dramatic episodes,

it chronicled
the cult's years in Oregon...

..but it didn't include anything
about the experience of children.

The series provoked
an outpouring on social media

from children who said
they had suffered

the systemic sexual abuse.

Sargam was among the first
to publicly share her experiences.

I ended up putting my story
on Facebook.

It had a profound effect

because I named my abusers,
and obviously,

everybody in the commune
knew who these abusers were.

'Then there were floods
of people coming through.

'Many other kids
telling their stories.'

You know, people were calling me
from around the world.

People I didn't know, I'd never met.

'It was sort of like a deluge

'of our abuse stories,

'and naming
many different perpetrators.'

What I wasn't prepared for
was for them to answer me.

One of my abusers
wrote to me privately.

He did say sorry.

But he dressed it up
that I was in love with him,

and I was the one who groomed him.

This is ridiculous.

A 12-year-old cannot groom
a 30-year-old man.

Sargam's alleged abuser,

known as Nityanando, or Nity,

worked as a pilot for
the commune's airline, Air Rajneesh.

Sargam, just 12, was a hostess.

It started with small touches
here and there,

telling me I'm so beautiful,
he just wanted to give me a hug.

And having spiritual conversations
about connection,

and energy -
what amazing energy I had,

and how he felt like
we were really connected.

There was some alcohol.

I thought it came from the plane,
but I don't know,

maybe he just bought it.

And then eventually he said to me,
you know,

"We have such an amazing bond.

"I want you to come home with me,

"just so that we can be near
each other and I can just hold you."

I really thought I understood,
I was safe.

And then we got back
to his trailer...

No, he raped me.

He raped me. And...

I felt so stupid.

DIAL TONE,
SHE CLEARS HER THROAT

'Hello, good evening.'
Hello, good evening.

Is this Nity?
'Hi!'

We don't know each other.
My name is Maroejsa.

I'm from the Netherlands.

Nity is still part
of the Rajneesh community

and spends his summers
at a meditation retreat in Corfu.

Sargam told us
he'd offered her money

to stop her going public
with her story,

but she says she wants the world
to know the truth.

I'm making a documentary
about the Rajneesh kids.

'He doesn't know
we're recording the call.'

'The truth of the matter is,
a lot of big mistakes were made.

'And obviously, the kids got hurt.'

Yeah, you mean sexually...
sexually abused by... by adults?

'That is one aspect of it.'

'This is a very fragile subject
we're talking about.' Yes.

'There's a lot of pain,
and everybody has it.

'I... I hurt Sargam incredibly,
and I didn't know.'

The fact is that
the two of you had sex

and that Sargam was a child.

'Absolutely. And... And I take
full responsibility for that.

'And... And what I know is,
that was a big mistake I made.

'And I'm really sorry for it.'

Would you be willing
to speak about it with me on camera?

'Absolutely not.'
Why?

'Because my story
is between me and another person.

'One adult and one child.

'One of the problems we have
in this conversation

'is we use the word "rape",
but when we use that word,

'we automatically add violence
into it.'

Yes, it is...

'But energetically,
that's not how it played out.'

Well, that is where we...
we really differ in opinion.

I mean, I went through
the same thing

with about four people, aged 13.

You know, it's not that there's
a creep jumping out of a bush

in a dark street
and violently raping you,

but it's... but it is the same.
It is rape.

'Technically, it was a crime
that was committed.

'Absolutely, you're correct.

'Practically speaking, we were
living in a different context.

'The context doesn't make it right,

'but it does put it into
the perspective

'of the situation we were in.'

Very few Sannyasin men
are willing to talk publicly

about sex with minors,

but one man did agree
to an interview.

Toby joined the cult
when he was in his late 20s

and spent four years
at the ranch in Oregon.

I mean, I knew
that there was sex happening

between younger people
and the adults.

There were some people
who were really, like,

aggressively going after
these girls.

It was so normalised.

I worked around
a lot of the teenagers,

and it looked to me
like they were having a fine time.

Do you have any experiences yourself
with the teenagers?

I had one experience
with a 16-year-old girl.

Um...

and when I did it, I thought,

"Why am I doing this?

"I don't have anything in common
with this person."

I was 32, I believe.
So I was twice her age.

I don't really consider myself
an abuser,

but I pandered to my own... lust.

You know, it was a few days,
and then I realised,

no, this... this really...
this is crazy.

It was not something I was proud of,
let me put it that way.

The other thing,
and I will say this,

it's a very unpopular view, but...

the kids themselves
were acting out sexually,

so they were very aggressively
flirting with men.

I mean, "acting out"...

..might have been just a way
to survive in that environment.

Absolutely. Absolutely.

And you've constantly got people
hitting on you.

You've constantly got this pressure.

I know that the girls
were fitted with contraceptives

as soon as they hit puberty.
Yeah.

Can we take a break? I'm sorry.
Yeah.

Oh, sorry.
Careful. God.

Be right back.
Yeah.

I still struggle with the trauma

when I remember the constant
pressure from men to have sex.

We were expected to be "juicy",
as they said then,

and say yes to everything.

Hi.

'I became friends with Binu
on Facebook,

'when she shared her story.'

Aww. Hi.

'We haven't met in person
until now.'

I started having sex
when I got there.

I just felt like I was living
the ranch life,

living the commune life.

We were underneath the umbrella
that all sex is OK.

And sex with whoever is OK.

You don't have to be in love
with them,

you don't have to be partnered
with them...

..you just can have sex with them.
And that's good.

I remember sleeping
with a lot of men,

and, you know, we would list
the guys we slept with,

we would write them down. I would.

From 12 to 16...

like, 150 men...

..in those four years.

Yeah.

After I lost my virginity,

I get this message to go to
the little medical trailer.

Three other teens were there.

And so the nurse practitioner
comes out and says, "Oh, yes.

"You were all told to come here

"because you need to be fitted
for diaphragms."

I mean, literally,
I lost my virginity, like,

days before, like, not long.

And we all had diaphragms
after that.

Age 12?
At age 12.

We had a gynaecologist
that took care of us.

Why would you have
so many yeast infections

when you're a child?

But I did, I had a lot of them.

And you know obviously why.

And did nobody say,
"Listen, this is not good for you.

"This is wrong"?
No.

Not a soul. I don't recall anyone
ever saying that at all.

Never do I recall anyone
taking me aside and saying,

"Maybe you don't need to have sex
with all these people," or...

.."focus on something else."

What else would you focus on?

I don't know what else you do.

I'm gonna take my shades off, huh?

My hair's OK?
WOMAN: Yeah.

At the ranch,

the senior person carrying out
Bhagwan's orders

was this woman known as Sheela.

I look real tough with shades on.

The cult's offices were in
a building called Jesus Grove,

where we've been told that the order

to give girls contraception
was issued from

as part of efforts to hide what
was going on from the outside world.

One morning, I wake up...
and the diary with the list

of the guys that I'd been
sleeping with, they're gone.

I just was horrified.

Who had it? Why did they take it?

And then you come to find out
it wasn't just me

whose diary was stolen,
it was a bunch of other...

my roommates' diaries, us girls.

Some of the girls said,

"We were enlisted to take
those diaries out of your rooms."

We were then asked to write a list
of all the men

that we'd had sex with
for Jesus Grove, Sheela,

to understand who would
potentially undermine the commune.

And so on the list were adult men?

This was all about adult men.
She only wanted to know about,

"What older men
have you slept with?"

They compiled a list that contained
100 or more names.

Those people were called in to
a meeting and told to be discreet.

They weren't told not to do this.

They weren't told it was unethical,

that they had to stop, or anything.

They were told to be discreet.

And apparently, what I've heard

is that the officials
were sniffing around.

You know, you're 12 years old,
you're working 12 hours a day.

You're not getting educated,

and you have sex with 50 men
in three years.

You're... It's child labour,
and you're a sex slave.

You know,
this is how the law will look at it.

We found little evidence
of any meaningful investigation

into the treatment of children
in Rajneesh communes

around the world,

including at their schools
in the UK.

I wrote about this one person

from Children's Services
who went out there.

He spent a total of one hour
out there.

They took him around,

and they showed him
what they wanted him to see.

And he actually wrote a report
saying he saw nothing wrong

going on with the children
based on his one-hour visit,

which was under the supervision
of the Rajneeshees.

Now that's a level of stupidity...

Well, that's remarkable.

So the children remained there
instead of getting rescued.

By now,
the cult was under investigation

for a number
of other serious crimes,

including a plot
to kill state officials.

Bhagwan was deported
for immigration fraud,

returning to India,
where he changed his name to Osho.

In 1985, the ranch collapsed.

When you come out of a commune,
every adult in there,

they had education,
they'd had property before.

They knew how to live in the world.

We came out. I didn't know a thing.

I literally did not know
how to write a letter.

A lot of us turned to sex work.

Hostessing, stripping,
all kinds of things like that

because sex is all we knew.

I had very,
very little sense of myself,

and I didn't have any idea
what to do with my life.

I had big difficulties
in relationships -

how to find someone
that's a good fit for me.

Nothing worked out. I was...

I ended up in abusive relationships.

It's like I'm always hypervigilant
that someone wants to use me

and dupe me,

and when there's real love there,

I can't always recognise it
and let it in.

I really ended up without
a lot of things

that might be really fulfilling
to have...

..like a child...

..or a husband.

And that is sad.

After my mother and I left the cult,

we moved into an apartment
in Amsterdam

and suddenly
had to be a family again.

I've often struggled to accept
the choices she made

which had such an impact on me.

Bhagwan died in 1990.

Today,
the Osho International Foundation

claims to be the custodians
of Bhagwan's work.

Its website has glossy videos
promoting

a modern Rajneesh experience
to a new generation.

The organisation is run
by former members

of Bhagwan's inner circle.

We've been told
they were made aware

of the abuse allegations
on Facebook,

but made no response.

Even as it emerged
that one perpetrator,

still connected to the movement,

was an alleged abuser.

When I posted my open message
to the Rajneesh commune

and a letter to Milarepa
on the Facebook groups,

other girls shared that
they had been abused by him, too.

This made me realise
it was a pattern,

especially for a certain age.

And that, you know,
he's a paedophile.

Yeah, he's got a thing
for pubescent girls.

I remember the worst
of the experiences.

Milarepa, he was so disgusting.

I was, like, 13 or something.
It was just horrible.

Milarepa is still
a well-known figure

in the global Osho community.

Good morning. I'm, uh...

My name is Milarepa,

and I want to welcome you
to the event today.

We're celebrating...

Posing as a student film-maker,
one of the team got access

to an event celebrating the opening

of a new Osho meditation centre
in Dallas.

We live in a crazy world.

And we have a tendency
to take that craziness inside.

So this meditation,
we have an opportunity to...

let it go, throw it out.

Take the garbage out.

Let's get started.

At the end of the event,

Milarepa gave our team member
his phone number.

DIAL TONE

'Yes, hello?'
Hello?

Can you hear me?

'Not so well,
it's a bad connection.'

I'm phoning
from a little bit far away.

My name is Maroesja, and, uh...

'Right. I don't think I know you...
I don't know you, though, do I?'

We never met.

I'm, at the moment,

making a film about the children
growing up in the communes.

'Yeah, so I'm not... I'm sorry,
I'm not interested in, uh...

'in participating in that.
Yeah. Bye-bye.'

Would you feel open to just...?
Hello?

OK.

Our undercover team member
has kept in contact with Milarepa.

He invites her to another
meditation retreat he's running.

YELLING

I'm going to visit him
to try and get some answers.

SINGING BOWL VIBRATES

So nice, huh?
Absolutely beautiful.

Right, so if you just pop over here.

It's just quite nice
next to this tree,

looking back at the building.
Sure.

Come a bit closer.

MAROESJA PERIZONIUS:
Our undercover team member

has invited Milarepa
to talk about himself

and the event he's running.

Just test this mic.

OK, testing...

OK.

My name is Milarepa.

We had an idea, why not do an event
with meditation and music,

and celebration,
and all the nice things,

so that's why we're here.

Events like this are always
a surprise for me.

You never know what to expect,

cos it's always different groups
of people,

and the energy is very high
and very deep.

Hello, Milarepa?
Yes, hello.

Hello, hi. I'm Maroesja.

Making a film about the kids
growing up in the communes. OK.

And I'd like to ask what
your response is to the accusations.

Can we turn that off for a minute?

The accusations of sexual abuse
in the ranch time, in the '80s.

Yeah, you know, I'm...
What's your name again?

Maroesja.
Oh, Maroesja, yeah.

I don't really know you.

I'm one of the kids from back then.
OK.

Um, I don't really have
a lot to say. And, uh...

I don't appreciate
you showing up like this.

It's because you...
You know, I tried to phone you.

Can you turn your camera off?
I'm not gonna turn it off.

Yeah, you can.
Why don't we call the police?

You know, you threw the phone down,
and I emailed you,

and I just want to...
Because I don't know you.

I don't know who you are.
You call me out of the blue.

I don't know where you got
my phone number.

I would also like to know
your response to Sarito saying...

I've already connected with her.
I've already talked to her.

..she was raped by you on the ranch.
That's just bullshit.

The thing with her
is something between...

It's a private thing between us.
No, it's not private.

Yeah, it is private. Yeah.
It's being kept secret that way.

That's how things get, you know,
neglected and ignored,

and it's not, you know, it's not...

Get the...
Back up, back up.

Hey, get off. You're not...

You're not allowed to film
like this.

There are allegations
you've committed serious offences...

You're on private property.
You're on private property.

There are allegations you've
committed very serious crimes.

Bullshit.

Today, Osho International
has its head office in New York.

Those who grew up in the cult

believe the foundation
should acknowledge

that the harm they suffered
is part of Bhagwan's legacy.

They should be honest.

They should be honest
about the history

of this mythical figure
that they are now profiting from.

They should be honest about
the reality of who was hurt.

And they should be held accountable.

The most powerful member
of Bhagwan's team was Sheela.

She was the star of
the Netflix series about the cult,

playing her role
as the most devoted disciple.

It was in this moment,

if death would have come...

..I accept.

But like everyone else
in the series,

she never spoke about
the treatment of children.

'Sheela is now in her late 70s
and living in Switzerland.'

All all right?

'For many of us former commune kids,

'she's the person
with the most to answer for.'

I wanted to show you a letter

I got from you when I was 11.

Wow.
It has your signature.

That is my signature, definitely.
Yeah.

"Beloved Chandra, love.

"We received the beautiful drawing
you sent to Bhagwan

"and send you his blessings."

I do remember bringing,
from time to time,

drawings to Bhagwan
from our children. Yeah.

What do you think was the experience

of the children
who lived in the communes?

That's a question
you have to ask the children.

But what Bhagwan's concept was...

..to teach them freedom.

Offer them freedom.

Let them make their choices.

The culture we had as Sannyasins was

a very overly-sexualised culture.

And I want to talk about the fact

that we all were having sex
at a very young age.

Did you have any knowledge of
children having sex of a young age?

No.

It was nobody's mandate that
you should have sex at a early age.

Nobody told you
to have sex in early age.

There were no discourses of Bhagwan
that I know where he has said

that children should engage in sex.

And...

..if it happened,
it is children's choice.

No. I don't think you can say...
Sorry...

..about a 13, or 12 or even,

you know,
younger children than that.

But I cannot take responsibility...

But they can also
not take responsibility,

I think you can.
No. I cannot.

There was systemic
child sexual abuse...

and you were in charge.

That could be your choice
or your experience.

It is not my experience.

Our sources say that
there were a few children

who were told to write down which
adults they were sleeping with.

There was 110 people on that list -

100 men, about, and ten women.

You didn't then tell
those 110 people to leave,

but you told them to be discreet

because it would be really bad
if this knowledge, you know,

came to the outside world.

Maroesja, I tell you,

I have nothing to do
with such story.

I have never lived this story and...

never heard about it.

I have to break off
the conversation...

I'm very sorry,
because, you know, I'm not...

I'm not being angry with you,
I just want to...

I cannot help you.

I cannot help you

with what you want me to help with.

Sorry.

Finally, I decide to write
to one of my own perpetrators.

Mitchell Gold
was an American follower

who had sex with me
in the Amsterdam commune

when I was 13.

Under Dutch law, this is rape.

I've had no contact with him
since he left in 1986.

And I want to know if he's prepared
to take responsibility.

Send.

He replies within hours
and seems genuine.

"Yes, I'd like to talk,
or mostly to listen.

"I have the sense
that's what's needed.

"I am deeply sorry
for what happened,

"for my part in our interactions.

"I have felt many things,

"but the biggest has always been
a feeling of deep sorrow.

"I apologise, Maroesja, from
the bottom of my heart and soul.

"Please let me know
how you'd like to go forwards."

Gosh.

Over the next week,
we exchange more messages.

But when I suggest doing
an interview on camera,

his reply is blunt.

I haven't heard from him since.

Like so many others,
he wants to keep things private.

By now, I know of 59 children
who say they suffered neglect

and abuse in the cult.

That's just a fraction of the total.

There must be many hundreds who are
living with the consequences.

This is the result directly
of the culture that was created

under the teachings of Osho.

And we're left in the wreckage,
and no-one seems to give a shit.

There was a massive failure
to protect us children.

How could there have been
so little oversight of the communes

in Britain, America,
and around the world?

Accountability for the harm
is the least we deserve.

I live with a sense of deep remorse

that I was part of anything
that affected so many people badly.

And the fallout
on the children is...

..the worst of it.

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