Original subtitles

[***]

ALL: * It's time for Animaniacs *

* And we're zany to the max *

* So just sit back and relax *

* You'll laugh Till you collapse *

* We're Animaniacs *

BOTH: * Come join The Warner brothers *

* And the Warner sister, Dot *

ALL: * Just for fun we run around The Warner movie lot *

* They lock us in the tower Whenever we get caught *

* But we break loose And then vamoose *

* And now you know the plot *

* We're Animaniacs *

* Dot is cute and Yakko yaks *

* Wakko packs away the snacks *

* While Bill Clinton Plays the sax *

* We're Animaniacs *

* Meet Pinky and the Brain *

* Who want to rule The universe *

* Goodfeathers flock together *

* Slappy whacks 'em With her purse *

* Buttons chases Mindy *

* While Rita sings a verse *

* The writers flipped We have no script *

* Why bother to rehearse? *

* We're Animaniacs *

* We have pay-or-play Contracts *

* We're zany to the max *

* There's bologna In our slacks *

* We're Animan-y *

* Totally insane-y *

*Citizen Kane-y *

* Animaniacs *

* Those are the facts *

[***]

ANNOUNCER: Recently, the Warner studio janitorial staff

uncovered this long-lost film starring Yakko, Wakko and Dot.

The year, 1929.

[***]

[ALL BABBLING]

[***]

[CHOMPING]

[DINGING]

[DINGING]

[AIR SQUISHING]

[***]

[WHIMPERING]

[TOOTING]

[BRAYS]

[CLANKING]

[BUZZING]

[TOOTING]

[***]

[***]

[SNORTS]

[CRASHING]

[TOOTING]

[BOTH TOOTING]

[BOTH TOOTING]

[ALL TOOTING]

[ALL TOOTING]

[ALL TOOTING LOUDER]

[***]

[CHIRPING]

ALL: * The crankiest of creatures In the whole wide world *

* Our next cartoon features Slappy the squirrel *

Enough with the singin' already.

* That's Slappy *

NARRATOR: 1969.

As brave American soldiers went to battle in Vietnam,

back at home,

demonstrators protested the war.

It was a time of flower power,

psychedelic music,

student marches and a nation divided.

Which brings us to August, 1969,

and Slappy Squirrel.

MAN: * Going up the country Got to get away *

* Gonna leave the city Got to get away *

* We might even leave The U.S.A. *

Ah, here we go. Summer in the country.

Nothing but rest and relaxation, right, Skippy?

Yeah, groovy, Aunt Slappy, man. Groovy.

Skippy, don't talk like that.

People will think you had brain surgery.

I can dig it, man. Far out.

[SIGHS] I had to get him out of the city,

away from all those bad influences.

You mean, like peace and love?

Exactly.

That stuff'll warp ya.

There it is, our summer cottage.

Out of sight, man.

Make yourself at home, kiddo.

I can dig it.

[SIGHS] I'll have him speaking English again in no time.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING LOUDLY OVER RADIO]

[RECORD SCRATCHES]

Knock it off with the Bing Crosby,

Stills and Nash, will ya?

Why?

'Cause the only tune I wanna hear

is the sound of silence.

Can you dig that?

I hear ya.

Good. Now, let's rest up for tomorrow.

Why? What are we doing tomorrow?

Napping all day,

if I have anything to say about it.

Ah. Rest and relaxation at last.

[***]

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]

MAN [OVER MICROPHONE]: There's 300,000 of us here today, man.

[CROWD CHEERING]

And now, Miss Janis Joplin!

[WOMAN SCREECHING ON MICROPHONE]

Oops. Somebody just ran over a dog.

For the love of Kaopectate, what's going on?

Something's happening here.

What it is ain't exactly clear.

Well, thank you for that.

Hey, you kids, what are you doing?

Go on, get away from my tree.

Like, mellow out, you running-dog squirrel.

Hey, we're here for the Woodstock concert, man.

Three days of rock from groups like Jefferson Airplane,

The Band, The Who, the Grateful Dead.

I'd be grateful too

if I didn't have to listen to this noise.

Now, clear out, all of you. Go home. Scat.

[***]

Aunt Slappy, be cool.

Let's just go with the flow.

I'm not going anywhere with flow.

I want some peace and quiet.

But Aunt Slappy, man, we're witnessing history.

Woodstock.

A single event pulling together a whole generation.

A bowlful of prunes would have the same effect.

[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYING]

* And it's two, four, six *

* What am I singing for? *

* Don't ask me I don't give a hoot *

* Just pay me With lots of loot *

* And it's eight, 10, 12 *

* I'm just killing time *

* My contract says To sing a song *

* Yee-haw,I made a rhyme *

[CROWD CHEERING]

All right, all of you, hit the road.

Party's over. Go on, shoo!

They're not listening, Aunt Slappy, man.

They're too into the music.

Well, we'll see about that. Come on.

Where are we going?

To the stage to put a stop to this.

I came to the country for some peace and quiet,

and I'm gonna get it.

* Who's got a box Of brand-new crackers? *

* I've got Some brand-new cheese *

Agh! Ugh!

Agh! Eeh!

Ugh!

* Would you still cheer If I had a tin ear? *

* Or would you throw A tomato at me? *

Guess!

Chill out, Aunt Slappy, man.

* Can you watch me? *

* Can you listen to me? *

* Can you smell me? *

[SNIFFS]

* Can you hear me? *

[CROWD CHEERING]

Unfortunately, yes.

Skippy, what's the name of that group playing on-stage?

Who. The name of the group.

Who.

The group on-stage. Who.

The group playing on-stage.

Who.

You're starting to sound like an owl, Skippy.

Who is on-stage.

That's what I'm asking you. Who is on-stage?

That's what I said.

You said who?

I sure did.

So tell me their name. Who.

The name of the group. Who.

The group on-stage. Who.

The name of the band on-stage.

Who!

You're doing that owl thing again, Skippy.

I am not, Aunt Slappy. I'm telling you Who is on-stage.

So tell me. Who.

The name of the group. Who.

The group on-stage. Who.

That's what I'm asking you.

And I'm telling you the answer.

Wait, Skippy. Let's start over.

Is there a band on-stage?

Yes.

Does that band have a name?

Yes.

Do you know the name of that band? Yes.

Then tell me the name of the band on-stage.

Who. The name of the band.

Who. The band on-stage.

Who.

The band playing on-stage!

Who!

That's what I wanna know!

I'm telling you!

Who is on-stage?

Yes.

Who is? Yes.

Oh, so the name of the band is Yes.

No, Aunt Slappy, Yes is not even at this concert.

Then who is on-stage?

Yes.

Who is? Yes.

That's what I just said. Yes is on-stage.

No, Yes is not here. Who is on-stage.

What are you asking me for?

I'm not!

Wait. Let's try this again.

Do you see the band on-stage?

No, I don't see The Band.

That's a different group entirely.

On-stage, Skippy. Look, see the band?

No, I don't.

Get rid of those John Lennon glasses and look.

There. There's the band.

No, that's not The Band. The Band is performing later on.

Who's on-stage.

You tell me. Who.

The name of the group on-stage. Who.

The name of the group. Who.

The group on-stage! Who!

The band!

No, The Band is performing later.

Right now, we're listening to Who.

That's what I wanna know!

[ALL CHEERING]

Hey, you squirrels are funny, man.

Come on up here and take a bow.

Yeah! Far out!

Oh, brother.

[***]

Yeah, yeah, okay.

Thank you. Now, everybody go home.

Including you guys. What's your name?

Who.

The name of your band. Who.

Don't start with me. Just get off the stage.

And the rest of you, go!

[GUITAR MUSIC PLAYING]

[CROWD CHEERING]

Why aren't they leaving?

They dig you, Aunt Slappy, man.

Oh, yeah? We'll see about that.

I said, leave!

Very groovy, isn't it, mates? Totally.

We are The Who!

[***]

[GROANING]

[ALL CHEERING]

Yeesh. These kids would applaud my laundry.

Why won't they take a hike?

They want more music.

All right, then. They can have more music.

Hey, everybody.

Let's polka.

[PLAYING ACCORDION]

* Uncle Yasha lost his shoe *

* It fell in a bog He did too *

* Uncle Smeeter Grabbed his foot *

* He jumped in the bog And went kaput *

[ALL GASP]

[ALL SCREAMING]

[***]

Ah. Peace and quiet at last.

* In the land of the free *

* Now, that's comedy *

[***]

[***]

Spew!