Original subtitles

The boots are tight... The drawers are small...

I don't eat anything... But I'm putting on weight...

It smells like new wine...

I'm starving

My hands and body are numb...

I haven't died and I never will...

Get up, you idler, get dressed, get up

It hurts, everything hurts... But I remember everything...

Hurts?

Crawl to your father then! He will heal you

I won't go... I'm in the queue with everyone else...

And you are in the queue... Getting on peoples nerves

I'm fed up with you being here... You keep on preaching...

You dressed out again, fake generalissimo...

You sleep in your full dress uniform...

You stink already

Come on the judge is waiting...

You, baldie, stink too go away

Duke, don't mess with the guy

Him, Christ, he's young and kind...

He could come in useful for us

If you go through the forest, don't get angry,

My elder brother is waiting for you there

You're running around like the living... Noone's in a hurry here... huh, marshal?

I've found you now you're still lying here...

Don't touch me, I haven't ascended to my father yet...

Make your confession, the father is waiting for you...

Get up, it's time to work

Everything hurts... I'm in pain...

I don't understand how you got here, who dragged you here... you're a suicide

And I don't understand why you got stuck here

everyone talks about the imperative power of my eyes... I'm strong

I will wait for my father to deal with all of you...

Father of mine...

Brothers!.. Brothers, where are you?

How are my beloved Russian people doing...

Communism has already been built... Happiness has come

Yes, they have built communism for sure

Best Christians are communists

Midway along the journey of our life, I woke to find myself in a dark wood...

I feel it: He's somewhere here, mean and fat

I've never trusted him you'd better not trust him either

Stalin, they say you slaughtered half of Russia with your dagger

while looking for happiness

Yes, a lot were slaughtered as they deserved

If you cut the grass, cut it to the root

Duke, it seems that Napoleon was seen here yesterday

Forsaken place

The hell with you, you're an old stinking fox

Searching for Napoleon...

Oh, my friend, what a hat...

Again you're hiding

What a wonderful posture you have...

As if you were wearing a corset... Grey suit

We've been here for a long time... The creator must be afraid of us...

We wander...

Wander...

Everything will be forgotten...

Everything will be forgotten and it will start over

Will start over...

And we are waiting for the queen...

We're all waiting for the queen...

Germans have always been the best warriors...

Workers...

Musicians...

Thinkers...

We must rule the world - the Jews got in the way...

Forgive me, soldiers!

We'll return and the Jews will be where they should...

Great soldiers! Rise!

We're still awake

I will rise and kill you once and for all...

Will rise and kill you once and for all...

Where are you going, where?..

War and architecture are my real craft

Mediocre architects they sit pretty even in paradise

We need a great paradise! Endless paradise!

Where are you, the great Germans?

Not a single vineyard... Everything ran wild...

No master here either... There is no master...

- Hello, brother Benito! - Hello, brother Benito!

Where are you?

I feel bored... where'd you get this horse?

I don't know, I'll set her free...

- Oh, you have a nice greatcoat! - Brother, I figured it all out!

I understood it all, but I have no one to talk to, only only you

All hail the great Italy...

Everything will return, all I need is to cross the Rubicon

Hello, brothers, how are you? Come in! Go on!

Hey, hunchbacked, where are your brothers?

In Vienna, they only know how to stifle talents... I know

Midway along the journey of our life...

Everybody to god!

Brothers! Brothers, come on, go...

Everybody to the god's gates!

- We're here again... but why? - The warder called us

God to one, warder to the other

Oh lord, there are Bolsheviks and Nazis all around...

It feels like I'm seeing a dream...

Stalin, brother, don't look at them, we re here temporarily...

There is no god! Why did we come here?

My struggle proves that there is no god

The fuhrer is a barbarian after all...

I'm a lonely traveler, I've risen from the bottom to the top of the people...

Oh my, Stalin, you have the snots? Why do you need it here?

The communists have everything

- What a lovely brother I have... - I'm ready for everything...

Marshal, will we go to the confession?

Authorities must be respected

Respected

God, it's so beautiful here...

But the Kremlin is way better...

Stalin, you treated me to some good wine in the Kremlin...

We drank a great deal

Contemporaries, gather your wits everyone!

I treated everyone to good wine communists are generous

Who will go first?

Benito, you first! Go first...

Have you seen my baroness Clementine here?

Brother, you go first, you are in such a magnificent coat

Of course, we're the first

They will not open to your brother anyway

Here he goes... He's nervous...

Oh, lord!

God, I'm here...

Don't open

Don't open, god, don't be stupid!

They will open to such a dress uniform!

Wait a little bit

Yes, brother, we need to wait a little bit

Brothers, I'm sure the medals aren't his...

Churchill is always dressed properly

Your dress uniform is better Brother, show them your uniform

Benito, they won't say no to your white trousers...

Glory to Duce! There is no god! I know it for sure

Could you put me through with the queen...

Your majesty, hope for victory

We all miss you

Your majesty, are you feeling well?

All the Churchill's brothers look forward to seeing you...

We'll greet you properly...

Benito, Benito! It sent you to hell

Poor Duce!

You, Catholics, are all socialists, communists, the same kind!

Duce is Lenin's favourite... This world is ridiculous

Comrade Hitler, it's your turn! Don't keep your brothers waiting

Don't get sassy, fatty!

Go on, friend Adolf, go ahead!

- Go on, fascist! - Don't worry...

So? Where are you? Come out... Out with you!

Devils, devils... They are all devils...

Stalin, it's your turn, tyrant, despot, atheist...

Go ahead, assault god's citadel!

Generalissimo stole my white field jacket

Lord, Lord, open

Later... later...

The Jews... the Jews... The Jews are everywhere

Koba, thousands of passengers aboard the Titanic were rich and young,

but just a few of them were lucky

Our family is having a bad day today

We can't persuade him to open the gates We have nothing to offer

Benito, Stalin shivers...

Stalin remembered that Lenin loved me as well, he's jealous

Stalin, why's your face that pockmarked?

I'm tired of you all! You will be lost, vile bastards!

Despot, let's play interrogation, huh?

- Brother, what is this arse doing here? - Shall we slaughter him?

But he's immortal... now...

Chancellor of the Reich, what are you musing about?

Go to hell, I'm on the astral plane

- Take Stalin with you... - I offered

Only the Germans could possibly build the heaven's gates

immaculate piece of work

Lenin said, in Italy the only socialist who can lead the people to the revolution

is Benito

Lenin said a lot of things...

Stalin, did you grow deaf? Lenin is my master

Stalin are you a Christian? Or a communist?

Wait... Let me think...

Fascism respects god, ascetics, faith fascism salutes god!

Stalin, it was you! You who stirred up trouble

Your socialism made everything possible for us!

Socialism Italian-style, capitalism Italian-style...

And I'm hungry

Religion is a mental illness...

God is corrupted! Holiness remains only in Vatican!

Oh, don't scare me, the first marshal of the empire

Duce, you re great!

And you smell like a bolshevik, Stalin!

Get away!

Brothers! It's time to go to the rally, brothers!

It's time to go to the rally! Why are you still sitting?

Yes, brother, it's time, the way is long...

Duce, they say you've seen Napoleon here?

Angels spilled the beans, they say he's in paradise already

I dream to meet him...

Brother, let's go to the people... Socialists, Nazis are such talkers

The first pilot of the Italian empire...

Benito - the emperor!

Napoleon... assassin, slaughterer... forgiven...

They killed Napoleon and France became African

I'm suffering so much... I'm surrounded by idiots...

Why didn't I burn London? After all, I could have!

Benito, we can agree upon anything here...

- I'll give you southern France - that's interesting...

Cain saw how a raven takes a stone and kills another raven...

Cain takes a stone and kills Abel...

How simple it is...

Chancellor, I always liked this coat of yours, it's well-tailored

Stand up, let me see

So, I stood up...

There's no chance that Stalin has some good tailors!

Change your dress uniforms, Bolsheviks, you stink

Do you want to take my seat?

Brothers, Stalin is a skunk

He forgot that I turned a blind eye to his Finnish war

Tyrants cannot be trusted...

But I trusted him! That's how credulous I am...

Stalin smells of sheep

Don't forget, Lenin organized all the life

And we are only Lenin's shadow

Everyone has read Mein Kampf but they didn't understand anything...

Those who do not understand will understand

Malevich, Malevich, damned Malevich...

Hey, hey, who are you? I can't see you, who are you?

Paradise fog is driving me crazy...

Adi, brother! You took offence again! You're such a child

Adi! Where do you run away all the time...

You're such a child

Benito, your excellency...

My friend, let's go ahead, never look back

No place for melancholy don't listen to Sokurov, let's go ahead

Black cape... That's beautiful...

Chancellor, you dress nicely, but you smell like a soldier

Germans everywhere, Germans and Marxists,

They can be distinguished by smell

- I wanted to sting you! - It doesn't hurt me, it doesn't

Go ahead, over the dead bodies of our enemies

The English men are bad brothers...

I have a sore throat all the time

I'd love to sing or give a speech, but I have a sore throat...

Desert brother, where were you wandering?

I won in Africa

Well, at least like this...

- Hey, soldier! Wait! - What do you need?

Take this gift! It was a great rifle...

- Scum, Slavic scum... - Brother, let's be friends!

Again with this Africa

Over and over you have to feed her, dress her... feed, dress...

I remember our mother all the time... mother...

I'm tired of this Africa, all the time it needs something...

Mother was lying still, dead

...The sun and the storm of her life was over...

There is everything in Africa...

...Her dead face was the one that I admired in my childhood...

This lyricism is inappropriate This melancholia again...

It wasn't like that she was old and died for good...

Hello, chancellor! We won... everywhere

Brothers! How many husbands did your mother have?

Why? You, devil, must know everything

It seems, three... yes, three husbands...

Virtuous mother

- Three is a good number... - Very funny

Fat men, did you bomb the eternal city?

Don't be late for the rallies, fatties

And now we'd rather catch up with Lenin's main apprentice

Disciple!..

Huh? What?

Stalin, my eyes are blue...

Oh... Schubert, Schubert, a German...

Be all eyes

You stink of burnt meat

You stink of your past

But everyone is used to this...

I love it fresh shoot it and eat it right away

Stalin, are you a Caucasus Jew?

A Caucasus Jew

Never stand if you can sit... Never sit, if you can lie...

Pummeling... no rest for the Germans... I'm sure its a German...

Even here, in paradise they pummel...

There is no rest for the Germans...

And Italians

Benito is too stupid, but thank god he died early...

I'm always near sir, can I introduce you to the dark forces?

Duke, my eyes are blue

These are my children... Look, they are crawling towards you...

Don't touch me! Take away your pummeling machine!

Closed again... never mind, I opened doors bigger than this...

Well, open

This young man is persistent, he sneaked in all alone, while there is no one here

Young bolshevik, have some conscience...

I read homer... Voltaire...

Rousseau

Me too Have you read Lenin?

I wrote "dialogue on love"

Lenin? Of course, I read it

Hmm, the French are always lying

- Young man, who does your hair? - Close it, I'm not here for you!

A good hairdresser

Enlist this young Stalin in your army, in naval intelligence

Do it... Yes, come in, come in!

- The naive Jew Joseph... - He is still not a pure Jew...

Hitler, keep in mind: Fascism is a reality, communism is a theory

to be healthy people must fight in a war every 25 years

I'll cut off your heads alive...

Stalin writes poems

I'll cut off your heads alive!

- Fuhrer, I see, they are afraid of us - that's it, that's it

It's time... it's time...

Stalin promised to send a lot of cognac...

And build a cognac factory in England

He lied

Oh, I can hear the sounds of the paradise carousel...

And here it is...

- And here is our park... - It looks pretty much like life...

Old carousels are poetic

Where is my Heisenberg? Where's my new bomb?

It's old, still it spins and spins...

Need uranium, plutonium...

Chancellor, you better call god or the pope

I'd rather call the pope I gave him freedom

The Vatican is free

- And here I am! - I'm excited, is that you?

- It's me! - At last, emperor, at last!

I wrote the treatise "on bomb throwing" what about you, German?

I took Moscow

I lived there in the Kremlin then I returned to Paris

I haven't had time yet, but I'll be there soon

- Napoleon smells of Cologne water - take this bomb!

- Much obliged! - Fooled him!

Fuhrer, don't take it!..

Fuhrer, take the bomb

Well, follow me! Let's go!

I'm excited, what a gift

Stalin, you're an instigator!

Damn carousel

Damn carousel

Stop spinning!

Stop spinning!

I hate this place!

Fool!

You're a fool my struggle! My struggle...

Oh, you're such a fool oh, such a fool!

- Duce, your friend is a fool - he's cheerful, he loves the circus

Call Cervantes, let him take a look...

Joseph, I hate you

they brought me your charred skull in a box

I hate you...

...to wait and catch up...

Koba, we won! Long live the Great Britain!

Long live my queen!

Not a single bird in here... But that's good...

Evil comes from wings...

Oh, pity about the carousel, pity about the carousel...

I haven't called the queen for a long time... how is she?

This is me and Clara... Me and Clara, poor Clara...

Stalin, I'm annoyed with your coat, you look like a wardrobe...

You and your Lenin stole the great socialist ideas...

And your Russian people pissed all over it

Don't touch socialism! It's mine! Scram!

Wardrobe, your battle comrade is waiting for you

Stalin, we are evil allies

Like the king of Italy. First he was kind then betrayed and drove us away

Don't take offence at the Duce, he's a bit of an oddball

Stalin, we can't finish the discussion in any way, can we

Damn with you!

You, Hitler, are self-taught, provincial

Communists are unrefined men

It's bad we did not share the world with you in time

A part to the Reich, the other to the communists

- I want the whole world - Well, we'll continue later

Brother, don't talk to him, hush, hush

Duce, get out of the way!

Your majesty, I respectfully inform you that all of us, brothers, are waiting for you...

...We will greet you together... May I inquire how you are?

Long live the British empire!

...The Roman empire... the Roman empire... Do not despair

You majesty, I beg your pardon, the devils are lurking around me and eavesdropping...

Do you have a telephone? Let me make a call!

Please!

No! No! No!

Bastards, scum, we didn't have enough time to shoot all of them

Don't listen to anyone...

Stalin you're mean

Brother, hold on! I'm here, don't torture yourself

We are immortal now

A communist always struggles enemies all around

Brother, come closer...

It's time to go back...

I'm here, brother...

- Stalin, where're you going in such a haste? - The superior is waiting

Brother, where did the death disappear?..

- I'm so tired, brother - There is no death anymore

Oh, my Wagner...

The death of gods...

My friend, the masses are prone to decomposition...

My people have always followed me and my social state...

- We're not late... - Where are you in a hurry?

Women love war, and soldiers love flowers...

A miracle of the era that you, Germans, found me among millions...

I found you, Germans, it means happiness for Germany

Hitler asked what the Bolsheviks smell like

- What did you say to him? - They all smell the same...

The herd has gathered...

Don't offend the people, brother, they will never betray socialism!

I came to Stalin, he treated me to wine, but I didn't get drunk...

He and his generals were crawling drunk around the Kremlin...

- Have you met Stalin? - I've never lived for one day...

You don't know Bolsheviks well, I was friends with Lenin

We read books in the same library in Austria, sat together...

Benito, we are all a bit socialists

I hate reds and Jesuits

- There were fewer of them yesterday - and they adore us more and more

They never forget about socialism

Even in death...

Huh, fathers, you're looking embarrassed...

Come here!

- He's the first! - Stalin, don't listen to the Italian!

You both come to me!

- Look how cheerful he is! - Benito, you're a shoddy actor

Go ahead, the dead Come to me!

It's insane, we're on Stalin's tribune it's amusing!

Wow, funny guys go, go...

Imperial tribune people love the empire

People love order!

This is an empire, we all wanted it

it's not gone anywhere!

- Look, they're waiting for us - Greetings, people... my people!

I'm thinking all the time, why didn't I burn Paris?

But I could have, right?

So, they gathered... Two of every kind

the ark...

Stalin! Hello, my battle comrade!

Hello, my battle comrade!

Battle comrade...

Battle comrade...

Comrade battle...

Soldier, cadaver... get out I know what you're thinking about...

I'll strangle all of you anyway...

God, look, communists everywhere is that what you wanted?

Brother, quit blowing your nose in front of the British...

Oh, devil!

Let him blow his nose, let him...

How many of you Churchills there are...

The British are ridiculous... They're fools anyway

We shall go on to the end, we shall fight on the seas and oceans...

We shall defend our island, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets...

We shall. Never surrender, victory at any cost...

Without victory there will be no life

Either Nazism, or Hitler, or me... we

I offered nothing but tears, sweat, and death... nothing...

Nothing

Hitler is mad, what a hysterical pig don't listen to him, the best is yet to come

We must always remember about love I loved everyone and the people loved me

You've lost your mind again, brother

Brother, get dressed

Dzhugashvili, are you a Caucasus Jew?..

Join the bolshevik party, fool!

We'll knock some sense into your head!.. And yours too...

Stalin is a Caucasus Jew, a rare Jew...

Everyone is going crazy!

A German soldier's bride! A beautiful bride

A communist's daughter...

You all came again!

Germans, I release you from the chimera of conscience

You are free!

I love you all, don't go I will lead you forward!

Churchill's brothers, come with us to the tribune... to the people...

I hate Stalin no less than you, corporal, but I will not give you Europe

you don't understand Germany Germany is smart

The pigs are good...

Devil knows why we keep coming here

He's somewhere here...

Nasty ass maybe I should hit him with my boot?

I want to, I really want to oh well

I woke to find myself in a dark wood... in a wood!

You underestimated England...

Midway along the journey of our life...

Midway along the journey of our life...

You underestimated... England is wise...

Italians! The Romans! The empire! The empire!

I need to have time to talk to god alone...

Now or never

We need to shoot dozens of deputies to rescue Italy

the parliament is the plague of the nation we need to wipe them out!

Only idiots stick to their convictions! Wise people don't!

Where are your gods...

They say, Stalin has a parliament the Russians could never have one!

I'm so glad I made it...

God...

Yes, but I'm alone, without my brothers, they will come later...

Take us away...

What do you say?

I'm ready, I am pure

We are ready

Leave the communists alone, I feel pity for them...

I'll try... I'll try... I'll try...

Churchill's brothers, I'll take you with me...

And I'll send down the rest of them

they'll be of use there soon...

I'll take you to me...

And what about my queen?

Call her

Lovely bonnets we like them even here...

God, I love you...

You look hostile at me

I see that you're not a proper soldier

I'll rise and kill you once and for all

Back to the grave with you deep underground

To the rock bottom

Heaven, what's in there... no signs...

And there's nobody there: It's hollow it's good that it's hollow

I can't understand why Stalin and I have red-haired daughters?..

Kids, get ready for school...

The cockerel sang a long time ago long ago

We're not the Jews - forever wandering in a desert, waiting for forgiveness

The Germans will do everything on their own!

Great Roman soldier...

I love you I'm grateful to you

Duce... we love you... What shall we do now?

It's time to go back...

Officer, where is my Clara?..

Germans are barbarians after all... Officer, it's time go to the brothel

My father, how many of them are around you...

How much longer do I have to linger...

Brother, we need to have a rest...

It's time to have a rest...

I could have married Wagner's niece...

Your Eva is still better

Here he is, my little brother...

Little brother loneliness, agony of soul...

Look, he's suffering

Your brother is suffering he chooses a bride for himself

Don't lament, my brother, all will be forgotten, we'll start anew...

The best is yet to come...

Soon, soon...

Wagner's niece is still better...

Will you forgive him, Churchill?

Young man, it didn't start out so bad

We all started well

Is a German soldier more dangerous than a bolshevik?

Everything is forgiven everyone is forgiven

Mussolini is still the Roman genius...

Duke, where are you?

I'm always near, Stalin, you understand English, don't you?..

Even Roosevelt noticed this what do you say?

I’m always close, I'm always near...

There is no god, there is only the party...

The party will give you both bread and man.....

Did you give the order to bomb Rome? Did you?

Soon there will be a battle... wait...

Bomb the eternal city - this is the will of my American friend

And your friend, too

I'm tired, I close my eyes and think only about the future

I can see it

Bright colours laughter, scent of lilacs...

You don't see a thing...

Communists are blind and deaf

Stalin, the capitalist, who is it?

Who? What? Where? Tell me

Capitalist is a cow cash cow

We will eat it later

We stepped on something it reeks...

I know whose it is...

Why are there smells here?..

Uncle Joe... you didn't go to your mother's funeral?..

You didn't go, did you?

I was away