Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,315 --> 00:00:13,491
Keep working,
you delinquents.
2
00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:15,406
I've got my eyes
on you.
3
00:00:15,450 --> 00:00:17,582
Don't think I'm
not watching you-
4
00:00:17,626 --> 00:00:19,236
[videogame]
Prepare to fist!
5
00:00:20,455 --> 00:00:22,413
You know I'm no
computer expert,
6
00:00:22,457 --> 00:00:25,068
but that's very
impressive work, boys.
7
00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:26,635
Todd:
We totally made this.
8
00:00:26,678 --> 00:00:30,421
Yeah, Mrs. Dempsey, you should
probably give us both 'A's.
9
00:00:30,465 --> 00:00:31,466
Yeah...
10
00:00:32,684 --> 00:00:34,686
That better not
be porn, Tyler-
11
00:00:34,730 --> 00:00:35,774
What are
you playing?
12
00:00:35,818 --> 00:00:37,211
Fisting Fantasy 8.
13
00:00:37,254 --> 00:00:40,562
It's only the best game
since Fisting Fantasy 7.
14
00:00:40,605 --> 00:00:42,042
Which one are you,
Curtis?
15
00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:43,086
LadyDeathBoobs.
16
00:00:43,130 --> 00:00:44,870
If you touch my boobs
you die!
17
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,046
Unless it was you.
18
00:00:46,089 --> 00:00:47,656
I'd let you
touch my boobs.
19
00:00:47,699 --> 00:00:48,657
[giggling]
20
00:00:48,700 --> 00:00:50,441
Okay,
XXXASSASSIN23XXX.
21
00:00:50,485 --> 00:00:52,226
You go through
the Deadly Gate first,
22
00:00:52,269 --> 00:00:54,924
you know, 'cause you're
so noble and strong and stuff.
23
00:00:54,967 --> 00:00:56,447
I'm on it,
noble friend!
24
00:00:56,491 --> 00:00:57,448
For the clan!
25
00:00:57,492 --> 00:00:58,449
[mocking]
For the clan!
26
00:00:58,493 --> 00:00:59,450
Uhhhhhh-
27
00:00:59,494 --> 00:01:00,451
[laughing]
28
00:01:00,495 --> 00:01:02,453
Who's
XXXASSASSIN23XXX?
29
00:01:02,497 --> 00:01:03,672
No idea.
30
00:01:03,715 --> 00:01:05,674
Probably some young
naive Norwegian boy?
31
00:01:05,717 --> 00:01:06,892
He's our
Norwegian bitch.
32
00:01:06,936 --> 00:01:09,243
Watch, he's about
to go through the gate.
33
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:12,072
I'm gonna block the gate
for you with my arrows-
34
00:01:12,115 --> 00:01:14,248
You're shooting me!
I'm on your team!
35
00:01:14,291 --> 00:01:15,901
Oh, dude!
I'm not trying to!
36
00:01:15,945 --> 00:01:18,078
Ugh! I'm getting
crushed by the gate!
37
00:01:18,121 --> 00:01:20,471
Wait, let me summon
some bolt lightning.
38
00:01:20,515 --> 00:01:21,777
Oh my God!
39
00:01:21,820 --> 00:01:23,474
Stop guys!
You're making it worse!
40
00:01:23,518 --> 00:01:25,041
Ohhhh, haha,
look at that guys.
41
00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:26,347
I'm dead.
42
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,262
[videogame]
XXXASSASSINXXX is dead!
43
00:01:28,305 --> 00:01:29,698
[laughing]
44
00:01:29,741 --> 00:01:30,786
That was mean.
45
00:01:30,829 --> 00:01:32,701
He was supposed
to be in your clan.
46
00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:33,789
Oh, whatever.
47
00:01:33,832 --> 00:01:35,486
It's just a game,
it's not real life.
48
00:01:35,530 --> 00:01:36,531
No-
49
00:01:36,574 --> 00:01:38,489
Besides, it was funny.
Right, Jenny?
50
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:40,274
Don't know.
Don't care.
51
00:01:40,317 --> 00:01:41,579
We're not done,
are we??
52
00:01:41,623 --> 00:01:42,841
I'll try harder
next time.
53
00:01:42,885 --> 00:01:44,582
I can be good
at this game.
54
00:01:44,626 --> 00:01:47,237
I'll prove I'm a good
member of the clan.
55
00:01:50,327 --> 00:01:52,503
Betcha XXXASSFACE
is probably crying
56
00:01:52,547 --> 00:01:54,288
somewhere in Norwegia
right now-
57
00:01:54,331 --> 00:01:55,724
[Curtis laughing]
Yeah, he's like:
58
00:01:55,767 --> 00:01:57,595
I'm a Norwegian...
59
00:01:59,467 --> 00:02:01,686
[energy pulsing]
60
00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:08,737
"Iterium Initium..."
61
00:02:08,780 --> 00:02:10,521
♪
62
00:02:10,565 --> 00:02:11,522
[energy pulsing]
63
00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:18,790
[videogame voice]
Prepare to fist!
64
00:02:29,192 --> 00:02:31,325
[videogame voice]
Do you have what it takes
65
00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:32,717
to fist this fantasy?
66
00:02:32,761 --> 00:02:34,719
Assemble your party!
67
00:02:34,763 --> 00:02:35,329
Barbarian!
68
00:02:35,372 --> 00:02:36,156
HA!
69
00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:37,157
Lady wizard!
70
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,158
Oh!
71
00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:39,159
Village minstrel!
72
00:02:39,202 --> 00:02:40,160
[flute sounds]
73
00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:42,162
Catarian!
74
00:02:42,205 --> 00:02:43,163
Meow-
75
00:02:43,728 --> 00:02:45,077
Holy shit, dudes!
76
00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:46,340
Did you hear
that voice?
77
00:02:46,383 --> 00:02:47,993
That's totally
from our game!
78
00:02:48,037 --> 00:02:49,952
Curtis: That's not the only
thing from our game-
79
00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:51,171
Awww,
my barbarian costume!
80
00:02:51,214 --> 00:02:52,172
Badass!
81
00:02:52,215 --> 00:02:53,782
Dude, you're purple!
82
00:02:53,825 --> 00:02:56,567
And your arm's back!
And you're stacked-
83
00:02:56,611 --> 00:02:57,351
GASP!
84
00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:58,569
I'm LadyDeathBoobs69!
85
00:02:58,613 --> 00:03:01,006
With actual
LadyDeathBoobs boobs!
86
00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:02,791
I'd hypothesize that
someone's used the Book
87
00:03:02,834 --> 00:03:05,097
to put us
in your video game.
88
00:03:05,141 --> 00:03:06,186
Someone who
likes cats.
89
00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:07,622
Todd:
I don't get it.
90
00:03:07,665 --> 00:03:09,798
Usually whoever uses the Book
makes our lives shitty.
91
00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:10,929
But this is wicked!
92
00:03:10,973 --> 00:03:12,931
Why am I
a merry man? Huh?
93
00:03:12,975 --> 00:03:14,803
Actually,
you're a minstrel-
94
00:03:15,238 --> 00:03:16,196
Great!
I'm a busker.
95
00:03:16,239 --> 00:03:17,371
Are you kidding me??
96
00:03:17,414 --> 00:03:19,199
Jenny, back when
people lived in castles
97
00:03:19,242 --> 00:03:20,765
minstrels were like
rock stars.
98
00:03:20,809 --> 00:03:23,507
They made the most kick
ass music in all the land!
99
00:03:23,551 --> 00:03:25,988
Instead of a weapon
I get a friggin' pan flute?
100
00:03:26,031 --> 00:03:27,990
That's an ocarina
and I think we'd all
101
00:03:28,033 --> 00:03:29,731
appreciate it
if you could try not
102
00:03:29,774 --> 00:03:31,515
to be so ignorant
towards medieval history.
103
00:03:31,559 --> 00:03:33,778
There were no cat
people in the middle ages.
104
00:03:33,822 --> 00:03:34,518
Or purple
she-males.
105
00:03:34,562 --> 00:03:35,563
I beg to differ.
106
00:03:35,606 --> 00:03:37,608
But if it makes
you feel any better,
107
00:03:37,652 --> 00:03:40,220
I got stuck with this
shitty level one wooden sword.
108
00:03:40,263 --> 00:03:42,483
It's a good thing
I have my arm back-
109
00:03:42,526 --> 00:03:45,007
How do you girls not
play with these all day?
110
00:03:45,050 --> 00:03:46,008
Uhhh!
111
00:03:46,051 --> 00:03:47,618
What's wrong
sweetie-cat?
112
00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:50,273
I think there's a
dead snake in my pants.
113
00:03:50,317 --> 00:03:51,796
♪
114
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:52,841
GASP!
115
00:03:54,277 --> 00:03:55,235
Jenny!
116
00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:56,758
[Hannah squealing]
117
00:03:56,801 --> 00:03:58,629
Oh...no...
that's not right.
118
00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,806
BUT, Curtis got a rack,
so you have a penis.
119
00:04:01,850 --> 00:04:03,634
and that
evens out.
120
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,245
Futanari!
121
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:06,811
I don't wanna
have a penis!
122
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,248
Here's what
we're gonna do-
123
00:04:08,291 --> 00:04:10,641
First we're gonna find
that lame dork that stuck us
124
00:04:10,685 --> 00:04:12,426
in this fantasy,
and then we're gonna
125
00:04:12,469 --> 00:04:13,557
make your
penis vanish.
126
00:04:13,601 --> 00:04:15,298
You ladies should
stick with us experts.
127
00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:18,432
I say first, we find the
asshole that stuck us in
128
00:04:18,475 --> 00:04:21,435
this wicked fantasy, and then
we make Hannah's wang vanish.
129
00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:23,045
Yep, that's
what I just said.
130
00:04:23,088 --> 00:04:24,873
Yeah,
but I said it better.
131
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,831
♪
132
00:04:26,875 --> 00:04:29,051
[videogame voice]
The adventure begins!
133
00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:31,096
Start your journey!
134
00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:36,058
Best part about being
stuck in a videogame
135
00:04:36,101 --> 00:04:37,451
is how straightforward
it is-
136
00:04:37,494 --> 00:04:39,844
First you fight some dudes,
then you get some swag,
137
00:04:39,888 --> 00:04:40,845
game over.
No surprises.
138
00:04:40,889 --> 00:04:41,977
Ah!
139
00:04:42,020 --> 00:04:44,849
Welcome to my
kingdom...OF DEATH!!!
140
00:04:44,893 --> 00:04:47,461
I am The Red Knight,
ruler of all!
141
00:04:47,504 --> 00:04:50,464
Listen up, asshole, give us the
Book before it kills you, ok?
142
00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:52,857
No puny book
shall destroy me!
143
00:04:52,901 --> 00:04:55,077
You will be the one
slain by me!
144
00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:58,559
Three times each and then
I will rule this Kingdom!
145
00:04:58,602 --> 00:04:59,821
FOREVER!
146
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:00,865
Holy shit!
147
00:05:00,909 --> 00:05:02,302
You're XXXASSASSIN23XXX,
aren't you?
148
00:05:02,345 --> 00:05:04,304
If he is, and
he's got the Book,
149
00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:06,088
then he must go
to our school-
150
00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:08,308
Dude, this is because
we punked you, isn't it?
151
00:05:08,351 --> 00:05:09,526
I know
what you're thinking
152
00:05:09,570 --> 00:05:11,702
but the Book of Pure Evil
is no game!
153
00:05:11,746 --> 00:05:12,703
It is no game!
154
00:05:12,747 --> 00:05:14,879
But rather
a mighty quest!
155
00:05:14,923 --> 00:05:16,881
First you must find
the sacred sword!
156
00:05:16,925 --> 00:05:19,797
And then you must
fight your way to defeat me!
157
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,364
But be warned!
158
00:05:21,408 --> 00:05:23,845
For hidden in these enchanted
lands are my evil allies!
159
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:25,237
OF DEATH!!!
160
00:05:25,281 --> 00:05:28,719
Joke's on you, pal, we're
gonna smoke you right now.
161
00:05:28,763 --> 00:05:29,764
Oh, will you?
162
00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:33,942
Whoa!
Badass!
163
00:05:35,378 --> 00:05:36,684
[videogame voice]
Entering the filthy village
164
00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:39,382
of !
165
00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:42,385
The first thing we need to do
is find the sacred sword.
166
00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:43,865
Whoa, whoa-
What the hell?
167
00:05:43,908 --> 00:05:45,345
What's the problem,
Todd?
168
00:05:45,388 --> 00:05:47,782
Uh, I thought we were
leading this quest?
169
00:05:48,783 --> 00:05:50,872
Hannah, um-
170
00:05:50,915 --> 00:05:52,787
Remember how
we asked you girls
171
00:05:52,830 --> 00:05:54,919
to leave the questing
to us?
172
00:05:54,963 --> 00:05:58,140
Apologies if I seem curt,
honey, but no way.
173
00:05:58,183 --> 00:05:59,750
Jenny's life
and my life
174
00:05:59,794 --> 00:06:01,448
are as much
on the line as yours.
175
00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:02,927
You tell 'em,
Hannah.
176
00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:07,236
Wow, Curtis, who wears the
penis in this relationship?
177
00:06:08,411 --> 00:06:09,673
[beeping]
178
00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:11,545
The Murk Lurkers,
the Murk Lurkers!
179
00:06:11,588 --> 00:06:13,938
They razed our village
and ate all our crops!
180
00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:16,811
You must help us before they
make passes at our wives!
181
00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:20,162
Murk lurkers?
182
00:06:20,205 --> 00:06:21,772
Todd:
What's a murk lurker?
183
00:06:21,816 --> 00:06:22,947
[growling]
184
00:06:22,991 --> 00:06:25,254
Sound dumb!
Little...and stupid.
185
00:06:25,602 --> 00:06:27,387
We're the Murk Lurkers!
186
00:06:27,430 --> 00:06:28,388
AH!
187
00:06:28,431 --> 00:06:29,606
OF DEATH!!!
188
00:06:29,998 --> 00:06:32,174
Leave this
to the barbarian-
189
00:06:32,217 --> 00:06:33,218
WHACK!
CLANG!
190
00:06:34,437 --> 00:06:35,830
Aw...man.
191
00:06:35,873 --> 00:06:36,831
[growling]
192
00:06:36,874 --> 00:06:39,486
Leave this
to the lady wizard!
193
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:40,182
Curtis-
194
00:06:40,225 --> 00:06:41,575
Bolt lightning!
195
00:06:41,618 --> 00:06:42,837
ZAP!
196
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:44,491
Oh-
197
00:06:44,534 --> 00:06:46,231
I had my staff
turned the wrong way-
198
00:06:46,275 --> 00:06:46,971
[growling]
199
00:06:47,015 --> 00:06:48,016
ZAP!
200
00:06:50,627 --> 00:06:51,585
What the hell,
dude?
201
00:06:51,628 --> 00:06:53,151
What- I killed
the Murk Lurkers!
202
00:06:53,195 --> 00:06:54,588
And you
killed us too!
203
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:54,979
WHACK!
204
00:06:55,023 --> 00:06:55,937
Todd!
205
00:06:55,980 --> 00:06:57,199
What? It's just
a wooden sword!
206
00:06:57,242 --> 00:06:59,984
I didn't think it would
actually hurt him!
207
00:07:00,028 --> 00:07:02,944
So each of us has lost a
life before we've taken
208
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:04,815
a single step
on our "quest".
209
00:07:04,859 --> 00:07:05,642
Jenny: Yep-
210
00:07:05,686 --> 00:07:06,861
That doesn't
bode well.
211
00:07:09,254 --> 00:07:11,648
[videogame voice] Approaching
the hall of treasures!
212
00:07:13,955 --> 00:07:15,913
Ok, we need to find
the sacred sword!
213
00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:18,220
If this is a video game
there's gotta be
214
00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:19,613
a weapon's shop
somewhere around here.
215
00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,441
But first we need
some gold. Ideas?
216
00:07:21,484 --> 00:07:23,443
We could look in the
sparkly gold locker?
217
00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:27,882
Ooh!
I won something!
218
00:07:28,404 --> 00:07:30,624
Looks like
shopping is on me.
219
00:07:30,667 --> 00:07:31,929
Curtis:
My turn!
220
00:07:31,973 --> 00:07:33,453
[videogame voice]
Plus fifty gold!
221
00:07:33,496 --> 00:07:35,019
Cooool!
Free skull!
222
00:07:35,063 --> 00:07:36,020
No, Curtis!
223
00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:37,065
ZAP!
224
00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:42,636
Ow-
225
00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:43,854
Okay...
226
00:07:43,898 --> 00:07:45,856
We need to find
that weapon's store fast.
227
00:07:45,900 --> 00:07:47,858
Mischievio
knows the way!
228
00:07:47,902 --> 00:07:51,035
Unless you'd rather
stay and play.
229
00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:52,210
Weeeeeeee!
230
00:07:52,254 --> 00:07:54,386
Oh, weeee!
Who are you?
231
00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:57,520
Gentle Mischievio
is my name.
232
00:07:57,564 --> 00:08:00,523
Aiding heroes
is my game.
233
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:03,265
He's rhyming!
That's amazing!
234
00:08:03,308 --> 00:08:06,007
If to the blacksmith
you wish to go.
235
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:11,055
Follow brave
Mischieviooooo...!
236
00:08:11,099 --> 00:08:13,275
Are we sure we can
trust this thing?
237
00:08:13,318 --> 00:08:15,799
I mean, he has
mischief in his name.
238
00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:19,890
How can you not
trust a face like that?
239
00:08:19,934 --> 00:08:22,371
Okay, Mischievio,
you may lead us.
240
00:08:22,414 --> 00:08:23,938
But trust this!
241
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:27,332
If you punk us, we'll hold
you down and I will personally
242
00:08:27,376 --> 00:08:30,771
drop a deuce
on your furry little chest.
243
00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:32,033
You got it?
244
00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:34,557
Mmmhmmm...
245
00:08:34,905 --> 00:08:36,124
Mmmhmm.
246
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:40,389
[videogame voice]
Approaching the Blacksmith!
247
00:08:44,567 --> 00:08:49,137
You see, I'm more than fun
I get the job done!
248
00:08:49,180 --> 00:08:50,921
Oh, Jimmy's
the Blacksmith-
249
00:08:50,965 --> 00:08:53,054
Sick! I bet we'll
get a discount!
250
00:08:53,097 --> 00:08:54,098
Ugh!
251
00:08:55,143 --> 00:08:57,101
Clang! Clang!
252
00:08:57,145 --> 00:08:58,102
Hey, Jimmy!
253
00:08:58,146 --> 00:08:59,539
Hey Gang-
254
00:08:59,582 --> 00:09:01,715
What can I get you from
the Secret Chamber of Stuff?
255
00:09:01,758 --> 00:09:02,933
Doesn't he
recognize us?
256
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:03,891
Hey Jimmy-
257
00:09:03,934 --> 00:09:05,327
Hey gang,
what can I get you
258
00:09:05,370 --> 00:09:07,721
from the Secret Chamber
of Stuff?
259
00:09:07,764 --> 00:09:09,592
He must be part
of the game!
260
00:09:10,158 --> 00:09:10,941
Oh!
261
00:09:10,985 --> 00:09:14,205
Hmmmm-
What can I buy?
262
00:09:14,249 --> 00:09:15,467
How much
for that metal bra?
263
00:09:15,511 --> 00:09:17,426
Oh, you want
the Magic Titty-Holder
264
00:09:17,469 --> 00:09:19,123
for fifty smackers?
265
00:09:19,167 --> 00:09:20,342
Hell, yeah!
266
00:09:20,385 --> 00:09:21,212
No, wait!
267
00:09:21,256 --> 00:09:22,431
Nice!
268
00:09:22,474 --> 00:09:23,954
[videogame]
Minus fifty gold!
269
00:09:23,998 --> 00:09:26,130
Dude, how is that
gonna help us?
270
00:09:26,174 --> 00:09:28,089
Well, it lifts
and separates.
271
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:29,960
Ugh-
Ok, my turn!
272
00:09:30,004 --> 00:09:33,050
I will take that bitching
sword, my good dude.
273
00:09:33,094 --> 00:09:35,531
Titty Wizard spent
all your gold, dude.
274
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:36,663
Ok, how about
that one?
275
00:09:36,706 --> 00:09:38,578
Titty Wizard spent
all your gold, dude.
276
00:09:38,621 --> 00:09:39,753
That one?
277
00:09:39,796 --> 00:09:41,145
Titty Wizard spent
all your gold, dude.
278
00:09:41,189 --> 00:09:42,712
This sucks!
279
00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:45,367
First I don't get a goatee and
now I don't even get a weapon?
280
00:09:45,410 --> 00:09:47,587
Way to go, Curtis.
Now our fearless leader
281
00:09:47,630 --> 00:09:48,849
doesn't have his
precious sword.
282
00:09:48,892 --> 00:09:50,981
We need to find
that sacred sword.
283
00:09:51,025 --> 00:09:54,202
If a sword to wield
my friend doth seek--
284
00:09:54,245 --> 00:09:56,378
Hey, Mischievio! Thank you,
we're thinking right now!
285
00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:58,989
But if a sword to wield
my friend doth--
286
00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:00,904
Shut up,
you little turd!
287
00:10:00,948 --> 00:10:02,340
Wait!
288
00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:03,951
I think Mischievio is
trying to tell us something!
289
00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:04,865
Mmmhmm!
290
00:10:04,908 --> 00:10:06,170
Go ahead,
Mischievio.
291
00:10:06,214 --> 00:10:10,653
If a sword to wield
my friend doth seek?
292
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:13,177
Come with me,
we'll take a peek!
293
00:10:13,221 --> 00:10:15,832
Okay, but for the record,
you're not my friend.
294
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:21,272
[videogame voice]
Approaching the secret temple!
295
00:10:23,231 --> 00:10:27,061
The sword resides
with the Great Deceiver.
296
00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:32,632
A blade called Sanddragon,
true believer!
297
00:10:32,675 --> 00:10:34,416
Ah, of course...
Sanddragon-
298
00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:36,200
What other sacred
sword could there be?!
299
00:10:36,244 --> 00:10:38,986
Oh, and I hope you're
quick on your feet!
300
00:10:39,029 --> 00:10:42,642
For Snaketicus
you must defeat!
301
00:10:46,471 --> 00:10:48,996
Snaketicus...
Right.
302
00:10:52,129 --> 00:10:57,047
♪
303
00:10:57,091 --> 00:10:58,527
Sanddragon!
304
00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:02,096
Curtis:
Hurry, Todd!
305
00:11:02,139 --> 00:11:03,663
Snaketicus
could be anywhere!
306
00:11:03,706 --> 00:11:05,099
[struggling]
I'm hurrying-
307
00:11:05,708 --> 00:11:07,667
Jenny: Todd!
Behind you!
308
00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:09,451
Sorry, Jenny,
but I'm busy trying
309
00:11:09,494 --> 00:11:11,583
to be the greatest hero
in this universe right now.
310
00:11:11,627 --> 00:11:12,454
HISS!
311
00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:13,498
Ahh!
312
00:11:15,457 --> 00:11:16,676
Oh, hello, Troupe!
313
00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:18,852
Now that I've got
you in my lair,
314
00:11:18,895 --> 00:11:22,246
prepare to be defeated
by...Thnaketicuth!
315
00:11:22,290 --> 00:11:24,248
Curtis: Not if I bolt
lightning you first!
316
00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:25,467
Bo-
Where's my staff?
317
00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,469
You must have left it
in Jimmy's closet.
318
00:11:27,512 --> 00:11:30,211
You know, if I had a weapon,
I wouldn't lose it.
319
00:11:30,254 --> 00:11:30,907
Just saying.
320
00:11:30,951 --> 00:11:32,213
HISS!
321
00:11:32,256 --> 00:11:34,519
Ha! You're gonna have
to be faster than that
322
00:11:34,563 --> 00:11:36,696
if you want to bite
my shit, Snaketicus!
323
00:11:36,739 --> 00:11:37,697
Fool!
324
00:11:37,740 --> 00:11:39,350
I wathn't aiming
for you!
325
00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:40,700
Hannah?
326
00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:41,744
Ow...
327
00:11:41,788 --> 00:11:42,963
Curtis:
What?!
328
00:11:43,006 --> 00:11:47,358
Hi fluffy pillows,
time to go nap nap...
329
00:11:47,402 --> 00:11:50,361
Hannah?!
330
00:11:50,405 --> 00:11:54,235
SNAKETICUS!!!
331
00:11:57,325 --> 00:11:59,066
Snaketicus,
if she dies so help me-
332
00:11:59,109 --> 00:12:01,851
Oh, I have a cure,
and I'll give it to you.
333
00:12:01,895 --> 00:12:04,680
But only if you feed
me... a thacrifithe!
334
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:06,595
I think we all know what
we have to do here-
335
00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,075
Yeah-
We give him Mischievio.
336
00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:08,684
Uh!
337
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:09,772
Absolutely!
338
00:12:09,816 --> 00:12:10,555
HISS!
339
00:12:10,599 --> 00:12:11,861
Whoa, hey!
340
00:12:11,905 --> 00:12:15,082
To the snake you
would throw me?
341
00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:17,432
Well, Mischievio
says blow me!
342
00:12:17,475 --> 00:12:20,652
I can't choose between my
girlfriend and a magical imp!
343
00:12:20,696 --> 00:12:23,090
You can't do that
to a man!
344
00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:24,352
It's me-
345
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,702
Hannah for me.
346
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:27,703
Jenny: No...
347
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:28,704
No-
348
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:29,487
No.
349
00:12:29,531 --> 00:12:30,662
How thurprithing.
350
00:12:30,706 --> 00:12:32,795
The lady withard
ith the true hero,
351
00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:34,536
and not the barbarian.
352
00:12:34,579 --> 00:12:36,190
There ith no cure.
353
00:12:36,233 --> 00:12:37,887
[laughing]
354
00:12:37,931 --> 00:12:39,323
Firtht I will eat you,
355
00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:41,108
and then I'm gonna
eat your friendth!
356
00:12:41,151 --> 00:12:44,415
And then I'll have a nap!
Becauthe I will be full.
357
00:12:44,459 --> 00:12:46,200
You're a dishonest
snake!
358
00:12:46,243 --> 00:12:47,331
HISS!
CLANG!
359
00:12:48,158 --> 00:12:49,899
My, my fangs!
360
00:12:49,943 --> 00:12:51,509
I just had
them capped!
361
00:12:51,553 --> 00:12:54,338
You just got owned
by a big-tittied wizard!
362
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:56,558
You will die
a big-tittied wizard.
363
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:57,777
HISS!
364
00:12:57,820 --> 00:12:59,822
Haha, tickles!
That tickles, that tickles!
365
00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:00,867
Stop!
366
00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:03,521
HISS!
367
00:13:03,565 --> 00:13:04,784
Stupid kids!
368
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:07,917
Oh, and one
more thing-
369
00:13:07,961 --> 00:13:08,657
HISS!
370
00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:09,963
Ok, Snaketicus-
Ugh!
371
00:13:10,398 --> 00:13:11,747
Jenny:
Too late, Todd.
372
00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,401
Aw...man-
373
00:13:16,578 --> 00:13:17,884
How do we save
Hannah?!
374
00:13:17,927 --> 00:13:19,755
Snaketicus said
there was no cure!
375
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,539
My eyes are
up here, dude!
376
00:13:21,583 --> 00:13:22,584
Sorry-
377
00:13:23,628 --> 00:13:27,023
Mischievio
knows a cure.
378
00:13:27,067 --> 00:13:27,937
Huh?
379
00:13:27,981 --> 00:13:29,199
That didn't rhyme.
380
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:32,550
Well, Mischievio
feels like poo.
381
00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:35,249
Doesn't really want
to rhyme for you.
382
00:13:35,292 --> 00:13:36,293
That rhymed.
383
00:13:36,337 --> 00:13:37,773
But Mischievio!
384
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,601
I almost sacrificed
my life for you!
385
00:13:39,644 --> 00:13:43,431
Ok...for you
Mischievio will tell,
386
00:13:43,474 --> 00:13:48,479
but the goateed Minstrel
you can go to...hell.
387
00:13:50,438 --> 00:13:52,832
[videogame voice] Approaching
the grove of healing!
388
00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:56,574
To revive the Catarian
and resume out hunt,
389
00:13:56,618 --> 00:13:59,186
we'll need a song
from this Minstrel cu-
390
00:13:59,229 --> 00:14:00,970
Todd: Hey!
391
00:14:01,014 --> 00:14:02,232
Seriously?
392
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:04,844
For Hannah.
393
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:15,202
[Jenny playing]
394
00:14:15,245 --> 00:14:16,464
Hannah:
Curtis...
395
00:14:17,465 --> 00:14:19,075
Wow, it's working!
396
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:20,816
Thanks, Jenny!
397
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:21,861
Yeah-
398
00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:24,602
You okay?
Let's go.
399
00:14:24,646 --> 00:14:25,603
[Jenny playing]
400
00:14:25,647 --> 00:14:27,040
Todd:
Come on, Jenny!
401
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:29,433
Hey, Jenny,
come on!
402
00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,435
[Jenny playing]
403
00:14:31,479 --> 00:14:32,480
JENNY!
404
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:36,223
[videgame voice]
Approaching the Ice Cave!
405
00:14:36,266 --> 00:14:42,446
♪
406
00:14:42,490 --> 00:14:46,798
The Frost Goblim roams
this cold domain!
407
00:14:46,842 --> 00:14:50,628
She'll freeze you in ice
and here you'll remain!
408
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:55,459
Frost Goblin: I smell
a bunch of delinquentsssss!
409
00:14:56,069 --> 00:14:59,507
Your ass is ice!
410
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,639
Dudes, check out
that door!
411
00:15:01,683 --> 00:15:03,641
Somehow we've got
to unlock it
412
00:15:03,685 --> 00:15:05,643
while avoiding the
Goblin's touch.
413
00:15:05,687 --> 00:15:07,515
This will
require stealth.
414
00:15:08,298 --> 00:15:09,865
Why are you
looking at me?
415
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,432
Duh,
you're a Catarian.
416
00:15:11,475 --> 00:15:12,868
Your species
specializes in stealth.
417
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,304
You gotta do it,
Hannah-
418
00:15:14,348 --> 00:15:16,350
If Hannah manages to
sneak past the frost bitch,
419
00:15:16,393 --> 00:15:18,178
how is she gonna
unlock the doors?
420
00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:19,483
No idea.
421
00:15:19,527 --> 00:15:20,963
That's why they
call it a puzzle.
422
00:15:21,007 --> 00:15:23,052
'Cause no one
knows the answer.
423
00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:24,967
Don't think
I'm not watching!
424
00:15:25,011 --> 00:15:28,666
Even though I'm blind
I can still smell.
425
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:29,667
Good luck-
426
00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:39,286
♪
427
00:15:39,329 --> 00:15:42,680
[sniffing]
428
00:15:42,724 --> 00:15:44,726
I smell teenagers!
429
00:15:45,553 --> 00:15:52,908
[sniffing]
430
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:53,953
Yes!...
431
00:15:53,996 --> 00:15:56,651
I feel like I'm
very close now...
432
00:15:56,694 --> 00:16:00,698
It smells a little bit
like shit back here!
433
00:16:01,743 --> 00:16:02,787
GASP!
434
00:16:02,831 --> 00:16:04,702
That shape is
strangely familiar-
435
00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:07,140
If only I had
some sort of stick
436
00:16:07,183 --> 00:16:09,185
that was ten inches long
with a bulbous
437
00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:11,883
mushroomshaped end
and two dangling orbs--
438
00:16:12,580 --> 00:16:15,626
Oh, come on, come on,
we must make haste!
439
00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,585
The answer lies
below your waist!
440
00:16:17,628 --> 00:16:19,674
Shut the fuck up,
Mischievio?!
441
00:16:20,153 --> 00:16:22,590
I smell you, feline!
442
00:16:24,026 --> 00:16:25,201
Hannah:
This is ridiculous!
443
00:16:25,245 --> 00:16:27,334
Wait-
This is a video game.
444
00:16:27,377 --> 00:16:29,466
It specializes
in the ridiculous!
445
00:16:34,776 --> 00:16:36,952
Uh, is she doing what
I think she's doing?
446
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,562
That's my girl!
447
00:16:38,606 --> 00:16:40,434
And what a cock!
448
00:16:40,477 --> 00:16:42,479
She's pricking
the lock!
449
00:16:43,437 --> 00:16:49,704
[growling/hissing]
450
00:16:49,747 --> 00:16:50,748
[beeping]
451
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:52,794
Yes!
452
00:16:54,622 --> 00:17:00,236
Noooo, you have brought
warmth to my frozen hell!
453
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:04,675
I must retreat
into my ice cave!
454
00:17:04,719 --> 00:17:07,200
Ohhhhhhhhhh!
455
00:17:10,420 --> 00:17:11,421
Let's go!
456
00:17:14,294 --> 00:17:14,859
Way to go,
sweetie!
457
00:17:14,903 --> 00:17:16,513
[giggling]
458
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:21,170
Don't forget, Mischievio!
Haha! Ha...ha-
459
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:25,174
Oh, Mischievio,
we could never forget you-
460
00:17:25,218 --> 00:17:26,175
Get him!
461
00:17:26,219 --> 00:17:29,222
[struggling]
462
00:17:30,658 --> 00:17:32,616
Why'd you guys
go and do that for?
463
00:17:32,660 --> 00:17:34,096
Because that
fuzzball is a liability.
464
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:35,402
He almost got
Hannah frozen!
465
00:17:35,445 --> 00:17:36,533
And he smells.
466
00:17:36,577 --> 00:17:38,535
He's got like
shit-nuggets in his fur.
467
00:17:39,449 --> 00:17:41,103
Come on!
bang-bang!
468
00:17:41,147 --> 00:17:43,453
[videogame] Approaching the
lair of the Red Knight!
469
00:17:48,763 --> 00:17:50,199
Curtis:
The cafeteria? Wicked!
470
00:17:50,243 --> 00:17:51,983
Maybe I can
score some mead-
471
00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:53,289
Hannah:
And a dragon burger.
472
00:17:53,333 --> 00:17:54,551
Yeah!
473
00:17:54,595 --> 00:17:56,379
You ride dragons, Hannah,
you don't eat them.
474
00:17:56,423 --> 00:17:58,251
Look, it's
that red guy again.
475
00:17:58,860 --> 00:18:02,211
We meet again,
XXXASSASSIN23XXX.
476
00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:05,823
And so ends your
life... OF DEATH!!!
477
00:18:05,867 --> 00:18:06,868
STOMP!
478
00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:08,870
Ugh!
479
00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:11,699
Woo-
480
00:18:12,265 --> 00:18:13,788
It's a dance
challenge!
481
00:18:13,831 --> 00:18:15,529
I jumped and
dodged the first blast!
482
00:18:15,572 --> 00:18:17,226
Oh, man,
I suck at these.
483
00:18:17,270 --> 00:18:18,836
Then follow my lead!
484
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:20,838
Remember: The key
is in the timing.
485
00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:22,710
Watch the lights
and forget the music!
486
00:18:23,711 --> 00:18:25,147
Wait a minute!
487
00:18:25,191 --> 00:18:28,455
Jenny, you play Boogie Woogie
Uprising, don't you?!
488
00:18:28,498 --> 00:18:29,238
No comment.
489
00:18:29,282 --> 00:18:31,240
Now follow my lead!
490
00:18:31,284 --> 00:18:32,285
[videogame voice]
LEVEL ONE!
491
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:34,852
STOMP!
492
00:18:34,896 --> 00:18:36,506
Jump! Step!
493
00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:39,118
Jump! Step!
494
00:18:39,161 --> 00:18:40,119
Jump!
495
00:18:40,162 --> 00:18:41,120
NO!
496
00:18:42,904 --> 00:18:44,253
[videogame voice]
LEVEL TWO!
497
00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:52,261
♪
498
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:54,263
[videogame voice]
LEVEL THREE!
499
00:18:54,307 --> 00:19:02,271
♪
500
00:19:02,315 --> 00:19:03,533
Look at his chest!
501
00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:05,753
Time to finish this!
502
00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:08,495
Yeaaaaaah,
uh!!!
503
00:19:12,934 --> 00:19:14,849
I am defeated!
504
00:19:15,937 --> 00:19:18,548
But you will encounter me
again in Fisting Fantasy 9.
505
00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:21,029
Next spring!
Pre-order it now.
506
00:19:22,335 --> 00:19:24,467
Why hasn't the world
gone back to normal?
507
00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:26,295
I thought I defeated
XXXASSASSIN23XXX?
508
00:19:26,339 --> 00:19:28,384
Is it possible that
killing The Red Knight
509
00:19:28,428 --> 00:19:29,907
wasn't the end
of the quest?
510
00:19:29,951 --> 00:19:30,517
Ugh-
511
00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:31,909
What?!
512
00:19:31,953 --> 00:19:33,955
So how do we
get out of this game?
513
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:37,915
Oh, man,
I didn't kill the boss?!
514
00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:40,179
But I'm supposed
to be the hero!
515
00:19:40,744 --> 00:19:42,790
Ahahaha!
516
00:19:42,833 --> 00:19:46,054
And now the Red Knight
will meet his demise!
517
00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:48,491
When Mischievio
and friends take him by-
518
00:19:49,971 --> 00:19:51,407
Surprise?
519
00:19:51,451 --> 00:19:53,279
Yeah, we already defeated
the Red Knight, Mischievio.
520
00:19:53,322 --> 00:19:54,628
No thanks to you.
521
00:19:54,671 --> 00:19:57,674
We were supposed to
finish the quest together!
522
00:19:57,718 --> 00:19:58,936
Don't you understand?
523
00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:02,201
I'm XXXASSASSIN23XXX!
524
00:20:02,244 --> 00:20:04,420
So the Red Knight
is Mischievio!?
525
00:20:04,464 --> 00:20:06,379
No, no, no!
I am Mischievio!
526
00:20:06,422 --> 00:20:07,597
Kyle!
527
00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:08,859
Who's Kyle?
528
00:20:08,903 --> 00:20:10,948
I'm in your
computer class.
529
00:20:10,992 --> 00:20:14,387
I used the book to make
Fisting Fantast real
530
00:20:14,430 --> 00:20:17,172
so that we could be
a clan for real.
531
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:20,349
We kill you all the time.
We think you suck.
532
00:20:20,393 --> 00:20:21,611
I know that.
533
00:20:21,655 --> 00:20:23,700
I knew you guys hated
the Red Knight
534
00:20:23,744 --> 00:20:26,268
so I changed who I was
so that we could fight
535
00:20:26,312 --> 00:20:28,009
the Red Knight
together!
536
00:20:28,052 --> 00:20:29,445
What's your name again?
537
00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:30,838
Kyle!
538
00:20:30,881 --> 00:20:32,361
That doesn't
sound Norwegish.
539
00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:34,929
So you thought you
could be our friend
540
00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:37,236
by becoming an annoying
little shithead?
541
00:20:37,279 --> 00:20:39,281
Annoying??
I thought I was being funny!
542
00:20:39,325 --> 00:20:40,326
Endearing!
543
00:20:40,369 --> 00:20:42,197
No one wants to
be here except you.
544
00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,417
None of that
matters, okay?
545
00:20:44,460 --> 00:20:47,202
You have ruined
my fantasy!
546
00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:50,423
And you have ruined
my life!
547
00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:52,294
[energy pulsing]
548
00:20:52,338 --> 00:20:55,254
For your folly,
you must pay!
549
00:20:55,297 --> 00:20:59,301
For now it is
Mischievio's day!
550
00:21:02,652 --> 00:21:03,784
[energy pulsing]
551
00:21:03,827 --> 00:21:05,002
[giggling]
552
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:07,004
Yeah, now's my chance
to be the hero!
553
00:21:07,048 --> 00:21:10,791
Enough with the stupid
fucking rhymes, you jackass!
554
00:21:10,834 --> 00:21:11,835
THUMP!
555
00:21:13,010 --> 00:21:19,408
[videogame voice]
GAME OVER!
556
00:21:19,452 --> 00:21:20,670
I did it!
557
00:21:21,845 --> 00:21:23,020
I win!
558
00:21:23,064 --> 00:21:25,240
I totally saved us!
I did it!
559
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:31,333
My penis is gone!
560
00:21:31,377 --> 00:21:33,335
What's with
the sad faces?
561
00:21:33,379 --> 00:21:35,816
Man, I was supposed
to be the hero.
562
00:21:35,859 --> 00:21:37,252
My boobs are gone.
563
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,254
I had plans
for those.
564
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:40,255
Me too.
565
00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:41,909
[laughing]
Yes!
37364
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