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♪
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♪
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- Okay, orphan Warners.
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Wakkiver needs his gruel.
What are we gonna sing?
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- Let's not go through the whole
rigmarole of you pretending
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you don't wanna sing your
countries of the world song.
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It's getting old.
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- Countries of the early 19th century?
This might be a quick one.
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♪
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♪ Yakko's World music playing ♪
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♪ Great Britain and Prussia,
the Empire of Russia ♪
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♪ Two Sicilies, Sulu, Siam ♪
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♪ The Papal States, Zululand,
Persian Empire ♪
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♪ And Jolof, Kaabu, and Bhutan ♪
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♪ Ashanti and Toro, Punjab and Bunyoro ♪
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♪ Holy Roman Empire is gone ♪
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♪ Dahomey, Bukhara, Selangor, Bambara ♪
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♪ The Ottomans, Parma, and Kong ♪
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♪ There's Brunswick Bavaria,
Central America ♪
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♪ Schleswig and Saxe-Coburg-Gotha ♪
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♪ Archduchy of Austria,
next Queen Victoria ♪
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♪ Goodbye, the Empire Maratha! ♪
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♪ China's Empire of Qing,
Bhutan calls Norbu king ♪
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♪ The lovely free city of Bremen ♪
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♪ The Afghani Emirate, Aden Protectorate ♪
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♪ That's what they used to call Yemen ♪
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♪ Kingdoms Gomma and Khiva,
Limmu-Enarrea ♪
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♪ The Sultanates Maldives, Perak... ♪
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EGWIND: [grunts] Ah!
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♪
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- How'd we do, boss?
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- You have met the targets und quotas.
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[coins rattling]
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[slurping]
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- I know I've said this before,
but can I have seconds--
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- Nein! One meal per day!
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No more!
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- Well, at least give us
our cut of the profits.
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Oof.
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Queen Victoria has really let herself go.
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- Is eine Fagincoin.
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Completely decentralized,
private, instant payment,
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very low transaction fees.
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Is the next big thing!
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Just wait till our ICO. [laughs]
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You'll see.
- So, lemme get this straight.
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We don't get a proper meal break,
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you don't pay us a real wage,
and you take all the profits.
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How is any of this legal?
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- Why, it's the miracle of
independent contracting.
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Let me explain.
[Warners screaming]
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♪ Conceive of yourself, freelance ♪
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♪ Conceive of yourself,
not a real employee ♪
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♪ Sign here, you don't have to read ♪
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♪ Certain legal protections might
be something you concede ♪
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♪ Conceive of yourself, well poor ♪
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♪ Conceive of yourself,
part of the inventory ♪
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♪ We've taken away your rights ♪
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♪ You'll find that there's no overtime
when you are working nights ♪
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♪ If it should chance to be that
you have made a small mistake ♪
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♪ Or need a bathroom break, tough luck! ♪
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♪ So, go out and sing and dance,
and if you pee your pants ♪
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♪ Then, I don't give a-- ♪
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- Good night, everybody!
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- Nein! Your shift goes
for another eight hours!
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♪
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- How come they always
get more gruel than us?
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It's not fair!
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- Well, because they are pickpoc--
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I-I mean,
because they are employees.
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Ja. That's what they are, young Wakkiver.
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They do a harder job.
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You are only eine temp worker.
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[stomach growls]
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- Can I be an employee?
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Please?
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- Hm... Boys!
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Take Wakkiver out with you
und show him the ropes.
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He wants to become...
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an employee.
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[laughing]
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- ♪ Great Britain and Prussia,
the Empire of Russia ♪
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♪ Two Sicilies, Sulu, Siam ♪
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♪ The Papal States, Zululand,
Persian Empire ♪
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♪ And Jolof, Kaabu, and Bhutan ♪
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♪ Ashanti and Toro, Punjab and Bunyoro,
Holy Roman Empire... ♪
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- Huh? What?
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Stop! Thief!
[Yakker stops singing]
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♪
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[grunts]
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- [Cockney accent]:
Duh, 'ello, 'ello, 'ello!
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Duh, what is all of this then?
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- This gutter snipe stole my handkerchief
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while these two gutter snipes
distracted me!
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- Hey! We prefer the term waifs.
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- Or ragamuffins.
- Tatterdemalions for me.
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- Tatter-duh-- eh, duh, uh... aliens?
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- That was surprisingly close.
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- You three are coming with me!
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- Don't worry, sibs. This is London!
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Birthplace of due process!
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Innocent until proven guilty.
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- Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!
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10 years hard labor!
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Have them deported to the colonies!
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- Here you go, pal.
Get us a nice cell on the ship, hm?
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Something in premium convict...
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- Passing fake currency?
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Double their sentence! 20 years!
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- That's not fake! It's a Fagincoin.
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- Yeah! Our boss pays us in it.
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♪
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[crowd gasping]
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- Oh, I knew it was a bad idea
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to come to the trial, but,
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you know, I just love
these procedural dramas.
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- 30 years hard labor
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for circulating counterfeit tender!
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- Ah! [grunts]
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♪
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- Send him to Australia!
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- He means Austria, ja?
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Oh, it will be so nice to visit home.
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Ah!
[clattering]
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[whimpering]
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- I suppose I owe you an apology.
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I didn't realize that awful man
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was preying on your
desperation so callously.
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I'm sorry.
- That's okay, Mrs. Lady.
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Just adopt us like in the original
story and feed us gruel
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for the remainder of our natural lives.
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- Side note, we might be immortal.
- And we'll call it a day.
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[elephant bellowing]
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[screaming]
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♪
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[crying]
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- Parliament will crumble
like an over-floured Scottish shortbread!
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Onwards, vile orphans, onwards!
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[laughing]
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- Wow. Maybe we should've
stuck with that storyline.
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- Yeah. Looks way more interesting
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than our heavy-handed
treatment of workers' rights.
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[bellowing]
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♪
10436
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