Original subtitles

(whistling sprightly tune)

Starring Andy Griffith...

with Ronny Howard.

Also sfam‘ng Don Knotrs.

Strike!

Boy, you really do burn ‘en1!

No fouling, Paw? Did it really sting you?

Boy, you better know it did, cannonball.

I reckon | bel‘ler ease up a mite.

Nah, I'll just have to learn to live w'nh it

lill my hand loughens up.

Too bad we ain't got a batter, though

so you could get the feeling of pitching to somebody.

Good morning, Andy,

Annabelle Silby, how in the world are you?

Opie, take off your hat and say how do

to Miss Silby,

How do, Miss Silby?

Hello, Opse.

Andy, once again, the women of Mayberry

have elected rne chairman

of the underprivileged children's charity drive.

Oh, and I reckon you want me to serve

on the fund soliciting committee, do you?

Well, yes!

This year especially‘ the need is so great

Andy.

Now, we have divided Mayberry...

Excuse me. would you mind stepping,..?

,..with soliciting help for each section,

and I thought you might take the area

that goes from Grovers Plaoe

over to Banner Street

then around Cornwell‘s gas station

up to Tate Warren's store.

Strike!

Boy, you caught her flat-footed, Opie.

What?!

No use arguing about that one, Annabelle.

It was waist high over the outside corner.

Andy Taylor, what are you doing?

I'm sorry, Annabelle.

l was just trying to give Opie

the feeling of pitching to a batter.

You got a real nice stance there, too.

-Really? -Yes, sir.

You could have been a power hitter.

See if you can find yourself another catcher, Opie.

Okay. Paw.

Come on in, set down, Annabelle.

Annabelle, I declare

you sure do keep yourself busy.

There ain’t been a single time of need

that you and your ladies club

ain‘t been right there.

Well, thank you, Andy.

It's the truth.

Sit down here and rest yourself.

Want some coffee?

Oh, please.

I never will forget that fine canteen

that you and the club got up for the boys

when they was coming back from the war.

Giving up your time to dance with them.

Every Saturday night.

'Course | always did figure

the boys had been through enough.

It was a fine canteen.

Fine.

But you always was one for doing things right,

Well, I'm a proud woman, Andy.

Can't help it.

l was reared that way.

lknow. I know.

It gets harder, though. keeping up

especially the past two years

since my poor Torn, rest his soul...

passed on.

I know you must miss him.

Yes, I do, Andy.

'Course I guess I did pick at him

more than was right.

Now, now, don‘t, don‘t go blaming yourself too much.

After all, it ain't easy being married to a..,

drinking man.

Andy Taylor, my Tom was not a drinking man.

He wasn't?

Absolutely not.

Well, it's too bad Tom didn't know that

‘cause he sure did waste hisself

on some awful hangovers.

Well, he may have had a little tonic now and then,

for his blood, you understand.

Well. you know, I never saw a man

take tonic with a beer chaser.

Annabelle, Ideclare, you're a sight in this world.

You got too much pride to have a husband who drinks

so he didn‘t even though he did,

Well, now and then, on special occasions

he might have...

Oh, Andy.. .

l was so foolish about my poor Tom.

I just can‘t tell you how sorry I am

that I ever let him go

on that business trip to Charlottesville without me.

Yeah, I know.

Being run over by a taxicab

ain't the most fitting way for a man to go.

But I'll say one thing.

You sure give him some fine funeral.

It was beautiful, wasn't it?

The finest this town's ever seen.

It was the least I could do.

Yes, sir.

Folks still say

they say, "that Annabelle Silby

she sure puts out some fine funeral."

But you always was one for doing things proper.

That's the way I like to do things.

Well, then I can oount on you

to, uh, serve on the fund committee?

Oh, why, certainly. Certainly.

We need everyone‘s cooperation.

Even the schoolchildren

are trying to outdo each other raising funds.

Is that right?

Yes, donating their spending money, savings.

Yeah, I reckon Opie's right up there

with the top donators, is he?

Well, as a matter of fact, no.

No?

Some of the children have been most generous

giving as much as a dollar, and two.

Well, what about Opie?

Three cents.

Three cents?

Yes. The next lowest was five cents

given by Roy Pruitt.

Well, he must be kind of tight, like Opie.

Not exactly.

He's one of the underprivileged children.

Well, how do you like that boy?

OPIE: Hi, Paw.

Well, I’ll be running along now.

Bye, Andy.

Bye, Opie.

as?“

Well, if it ain't Charlie Moneybags

the big philanthropist?

How do you do?

What you talking about, Paw?

I'm talking about

the underprivileged child ren's drive.

Oh. They collected for that at school, Paw.

Oh, I know they did.

I know they did.

And when they called your name

you gave the large, generous amount of three cents.

My, that is big of you, Diamond Jim.

Did I give them too much, Paw?

Too much?

I could ask them to give back two cents.

Now, looky here.

We better talk about this thing.

Now, now, now, look here, Opie

you can‘t give a little bitty piddling amount

like three cents to a worthy cause

like the underprivileged children's drive.

Why, l was reading here just the other day

where there‘s somewhere like 400 needy boys

in this county alone

or one and a half boys per square mile.

There is?

There sure is.

I never seen one, Paw.

Never seen one what?

A half a boy.

Well, it‘s not really a half a boy.

It's a ratio.

Horatio who?

Not Horatio-- a ratio.

It's mathematics.

Arithmetic.

Look, now, Opie, just forget that part of it,

Forget the part about the half a boy.

It's pretty hard to forget athing like that, Paw.

Well, try!

Poor Horatio.

Now, look, Opie, Horatio is not the only needy boy...

Son, uh, didn't you...

didn‘t you ever give anybody anything

just for the pleasure of it?

Something you didn't want anything in return for?

Sure. Just yesterday, I gave my friend Jimmy something.

Now, that's fine.

What did you give him?

A sock in the head.

|-| meant charity.

I didn't charge him nothing.

I meant something for the joy of giving.

I enjoyed it.

I don't like Jimmy no more.

He makes fun of Charlotte.

Who's Charlotte?

My girlfriend.

0h.

Well, ljust don't see

how anybody who has got as much as you

could care so little about others.

I care about others, honest.

Not when you give

a little, piddling amount like three cents.

That's being selfish.

You should have given

at least a half a dollar or a dollar.

A dollar?

Gosh, Paw, | only have $2.20 in my whole piggy bank

and I’m saving it to buy Chanotte something.

Well, now, that's dandy.

That is just dandy.

Whole dollars you'll squander

on your girlfriend, Charlotte

but when it comes

to the underprivileged children's fund

you've got only three cents.

I wasn’t going to squander it, Paw.

lwasn‘t going to squander it.

Yeah.

What's squander?

That‘s throwing your money away foolishly.

Oh, but, Paw, lwouldn't be throwing it away,

All I can say is if your head can be turned

by a pretty face at your age

heaven help you when you're grown up.

ANDY: Oh, hi, Aunt Bee.

Hi, Andy.

I thought I'd find Opie here.

Maybe you’ll help me carry home some packages

trom the store, hmm?

Sure, Aunt Bee.

Me and Opie was just having a little talk

on the meaning of charity,

Charity?

Yeah, I was kinda explaining to Opie

that there’s two kinds of people in the woitd.

There's givers and there's takers

and Opie, he's somewhere in the middle.

He's a squeezer.

I don’t understand.

Do you know how much this young'un gave

to the underprivileged children's fund?

Three cents.

Three miserable, measly pennies.

You sure you don‘t want to make that four cents?

It‘s tax deductible, you know.

Is that true, Opie?

With all the money

you have saved up in your piggy bank?

But I'm saving that money.

He's saving it to buy his girlfriend Charlotte something.

Well, it’s downright embarrassing for me

I'll tell you that.

Here I am. the sheriff of the town

Justice of the Peace. respectable member

of the children's fundraising committee

and I'm raising a playboy.

Paw, I'm not a playboy.

You get along with your Aunt Bee.

I'd talk further

but I got paperwork that has to be done.

-Bye, Andy. -Bye.

Bye, Paw.

And we'll finish this talk later on, too.

Hello there, Andy.

How do?

lt-lt's me, Torn.

Don't you remember?

Well, Tom Silby!

Of course I remember!

Well, I‘ll be dogged!

I ain‘t seen you around these parts since...

since your funeral.

Funeral?

What funeral?

Well, uh, Torn, maybe we better come inside

where we can talk.

Andy, what's ailing you?

Well, it just can‘t be, that's all.

What can't be?

Well, you can‘t be, Torn.

You're gone.

lwas gone, but I come back.

But you can't come back

not after you're gone.

It just ain‘t decent.

What the devil are you talking about?

Why can‘t I come back after I've gone?

You're talking crazy.

Well, maybe I am.

Well, then-then, you-you do the talking.

Well, you ought to have figured what happened.

You know how Annabelle is.

Finally I couldn't stand it no more

and had a big fight

told her l was leaving

and never coming back.

But after a couple of years

well, I... I got kind of lonesome for her.

I thought maybe you could tell me

how she‘s getting on.

(chuckling)

(both chuckling)

(laughing)

I'll be dogged!

I'm just a flat dog.

Don't that beat anything you ever heard of?

Andy, would you tell me what's going on?

What's the joke?

It's that Annabelle.

It's just like her

not to be able to admit to anybody in town

that she couldn‘t hold on to her husband.

Only she could be so proud to do what she done.

What's she done?

She told everybody that you went down

to Charlottesville and got run over.

Run over?

By a taxicab.

And she had this nice mahogany box sent back

and had you buried

like you was in it.

What?!

Well, yes.

Far as the town's concerned

you're as dead as a hammer.

I don’t believe it.

I know she‘s proud, all right

but burying me when I'm still alive—

| just don‘t believe it.

All I did was go down to Charlottesville.

Well, Tom, we all figured

you was a lot further down than that.

Well, where to?

I'll show you.

Oh, wait.

In case you feel like paying respects to yourself.

"A fine man and a dear husband."

That's beautiful, Andy.

Was a nice funeral Annabelle gave me, huh?

Best.

Much of a turnout?

Turnout?

Shoo. More folks turned out to see you go

than they did that time

that carnival fella come through here

with that stuffed whale.

You're tooling.

No, I'm not neither.

Everybody was here.

Right over there

right there stood Mayor Jenkins

wearing them striped britches, you know,

(chuckling): Yeah.

And on both sides of him stood all the Aldermen.

All the Aldermen?

Every one of them.

-lncluding Sam Peabody? -Yes, sir.

Doggone it, Annabelle knows I can't stand Sam Peabody.

Why’d she go and invite him to my funeral?

I don‘t know that she invited...

he had a lot of nerve crashing my funeral,

Now, Torn, you're just being silly.

Now here Annabelle breaks her back

to give you the finest send»off this town has seen

and you go pouting over details.

She couldn't exactly check the guest list

with you, you know.

That's true.

And everybody was there?

Everybody.

Right over there.

Right over there stood your lodge brothers.

Right there?

Yes, all in a group, you know?

And just before they lowered you,

why, they sung the lodge song.

Oh, that's a beautiful song, Andy.

J' We’re brothers together“, I

Oh, but I used to sing second tenor with them.

They ain‘t got no decent second tenor outside of me.

They couldn‘t have been much good wthout me.

Now there you go arguing

again, Torn.

Now make up your mind.

You can‘t sing second tenor

and get lowered at the same time.

It just can't be done.

Yeah. I‘m sorry.

I guess a fella just likes to know

that everything was perfect at his funeral.

After all, it's his last party.

Well, it was perfect.

It was beautiful.

I even got to believing you was a great man myself, Tom

even though I never did see you equal at elbow-bending,

I don‘t drink no more, Andy.

You don't?

Without Annabelle to answer to

I found I didn't need to drink.

How come you come back here then?

Well...

Aw, you kind of miss her a latte bit, don't you?

I reckon I do.

If only she wasn't so... so proud.

Come on back to the house with me, Tom.

Oh, Andy.

Hmm?

Tell the caretaker my plot needs watering.

Paw.

Oh, hi, Ope.

Can I have some money for a soda?

Yeah, I reckon.

Well, no, I reckon you can't.

Asking me for money when you got a piggy bank

that's bulging like one of Jonah Conway's prized pig.

But I'm saving that money.

I ain't forgot about that,

and I ain't forgot that me and you

was in the middle of a talk either.

I'll see you in a little bit.

Come on, Tom.

Come on in, Tom.

Come right over here and st down.

Andy, what are you going to do?

I‘m going to call Annabelle, that's what I'm going to do.

Oh, no. Now, Andy, wait a minute.

Well, Tom, I believe she‘s ready for you to come home.

Well, what makes you think so?

How you know?

Well, I saw Annabelle not more than an hour ago

and I don't think

that she's near as sure of herself

as she was when you was alive.

Oh, no, Andy, I... I can't.

I can't do it.

Well, why not?

Well, uh.., she buried me. Don't you see?

She's considered a proper, grieving widow

and I ain’t going to spoil it for her.

I ain‘t going to have people laughing at her.

No, I ain't, and that's final.

-|'m going, -Now, Tom.

You're being a stubborn mule about this thing.

Are you going to try and tell me about my own woman?

Things is different now. | just got a feeling.

You've got a feeling, but you‘re not sure.

There ain‘t but one way to find out.

No, l.,. I don't really want to do this.

Uh, Sarah, uh, get me Annabelle Silby

on the phone, would you?

Andy, look, please...

Now, you better hush.

|'|| arrest you for being a disorderly corpse.

Uh, Annabelle

Andy Taylor over here.

Uh, are-are-are you sitting down or standing up?

Well, maybe you better sit down.

Well, all right, suit yourself.

Uh, Annabelle, listen to this.

Tom‘s back.

Tom Silby is standing right here beside of me.

(chuckling): Yeah.

Hello?

Hello?!

I believe she just sat down.

Tom, I reckon you better go on home now.

W-what'll I say to her, Andjfl

Well, what would any husband say to his widow?

Thank her for the nice funeral she gave you

for the kind words on your headstone.

Why, you've got a lot to talk about.

Look alWe now.

That's all there ever was the matter with Annabelle Silby—

just too much pride

and fearful of what folks might think.

Good thing that caretaker didn't see Tom

walk out of that cemetery.

I reckon he would have gone home

and busted every bottle of whiskey he owned.

AUNT BEE: No, no. Opie, you don‘t want that banana.

It's too near suppertime.

Okay, Aunt Bee.

ANDY: That reminds me, young man...

we was right in the middle of a little talk.

Last I remember, l was asking you

to dip down into your piggy bank

and pitch at least a dollar into the children's fund.

But I can‘t, Paw.

I got to spend it on...

I know, you got to spend it

on your girlfriend Charlotte.

Son, I can't seem to make you understand how important it is

to share what you've got with folks

that ain‘t as lucky as you are.

It just ain‘t nice to be selfish.

You-you-you see that apple right there?

Yes, Paw.

Now, that‘s the only one in the bowl

ain't that right?

Now suppose me and you both wanted that apple

and I grabbed it

and wouldn’t give you half of it.

Now, how would you feel?

lwouldn‘t mind.

You wouldn't?

There‘s a worm in it.

Opie, that's beside the point.

I'm trying to give you an example of sharing.

Now, I'd take half and I'd g'we you half.

Now, that‘s sharing.

And it's fair to everybody concerned.

No, it ain‘t, Paw.

It ain't?

No. You didn't leave nothing for the worm.

You don't have to carry the thing that far.

You don't share things with worms.

Why not?

Well, because, they ain't like people.

They don‘t work or wear clothes

or go to school or anything.

All they do is lay around all day

inside apples and eat.

That's all they do?

That‘s all.

Boy, and l was feeling sorry for them.

I've got a feeling we're kind of drifting here.

Son, ljust can't seem to get through to you

how important it is

that you give more than three measly pennies

to an important charity.

But I can‘t, Paw.

That's what you've been saying

and that ain‘t good enough.

Now, are you going to dip down and do better?

Paw, Ican‘t.

Then just march right on up to your room

right up there— right up to your room, go on--

and don't bother coming down for no supper neither

not at least until you're ready to give

more than three cents.

You can just sit down up there

and study about that thing.

There's no excuse for that kind of stinginess.

It's just downright selfish is what it is.

Even young‘uns ought to know better than that

especially this young'un.

Son of the sheriff

and he gives the least amount.

That boy is going to make me

the laughingstock of Mayberry. . .

Andy Taylor, will you just stop and listen to yourself?

What?

You've been talking, but you haven‘t been listening.

Annabelle?

Annabelle Silby.

She was always afraid of what folks might think

and here you are carrying on the same way.

Well...

Annabelle Silby

didn't have any faith in her Tom.

And now it appears you don‘t have faith

in your own little boy?

Oh, you know what a good little fella he is.

Just because he doesn‘t give enough to a collection

you're ready to forget all that?

Just 'cause you're afraid of what folks might think?

Well, | just thought that...

lwas... lwastr...

Didn‘t you hear me trying to...?

You know something, Aunt Bee?

No, not yet I don‘t.

You‘re as right as rain.

I just hadn‘t thought of it that way.

It‘s true.

I know my own little boy, and he's a fine little fella.

And if he decides to hold back once in a moon

why, ain‘t no harm done.

Good.

Now, call him down for supper.

Yeah, I guess I better.

Uh...

Well, you'll have to call louder than that.

Yeah.

Uh...

Uh... Opie, you can come on down!

We'll just forget about what we was talking about

and we‘ll have our supper!

You like me again, Paw?

Son, I never stopped liking you.

You know that.

And we’re going to forget about

raising your donation at school

and about breaking into your piggy bank...

I'd like to, Paw, but like I said...

It‘s all right.

You're saving to buy

your little girlfriend Charlotte a toy—

that's all right this time, I expect.

No, Paw.

Or if you want to take her to the movies

and buy her two dollars worth of popcorn

that's all right.

I'm going to buy her a coat.

After all, it's your savings.

And whatever you...

You're going to buy her a what?

A coat.

The one she's got‘s kind of wore out.

It is, huh?

Mm-hmm, When I asked her

how come she didn't get a new one

she said ’cause her ma didn't have enough money.

And you were saving to buy her a coat

for next winter?

Mm-hmm. By then I'll have enough.

Well, Opie, you never told me

that's what the money was for.

You never asked me.

No, I guess I didn't, did I?

What are we having for supper?

Well, you and Aunt Bee‘s having fried chicken...

and I‘m having crow.

Tom, how‘s it feel being back?

Just fine, Andy.

It’s going to be all right.

You know, this morning, Annabelle and me,

we went and took a walk

over to the cemetery where I'm buried.

-You did? —Mm-hmm.

You sound like you're beginning to believe

you really are buried over there.

Well, that‘s the whole idea, Andy.

You see, the hen-pecked Tom Silby,

the one who drank too much, he is buried over there.

Oh, I see what you mean.

Of course I never did really believe

you was buried over there.

You mean you knew all along?

No, not exactly.

Just with all the alcohol you had in your system,

it seemed mighty peculiar

that the grass over you was growing so well.

(whistling sprightly tune)