All language subtitles for Batman s02e46 A Riddling Controversy.eng

� Batman

When last we saw,
our beleaguered battlers

they were slowly sinking

in a bitter batter
of Riddler quicksand.

A grim and gritty end
awaits them

unless something awfully good
happens awfully fast.

[theme music]

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

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� Batman

� Batman

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� Na na na na na

� Batman

[instrumental music]

Holy Titanic, Batman, we're
going down for the last time.

Don't be a pessimist, Robin.

Many of those who survived
that tragedy did so by remaining

calm on treading water
until help arrived.

But this is quicksand.

I know, Robin

but I seem to recall a recent
report on Jungle Survival

which indicated that many
victims of quicksand are victims

because of their own panic.

It's not doing a lot
for my nerves either.

The specific gravity
of quicksand approximates

that of water. If we remain
calm and motionless

we shouldn't sink much further
than your lower lip.

- It's working, Batman.
- Yes.

One thing worries me though,
how long can we keep floating.

We won't have to float
long, old chum.

If our experimental
heel-and-toe Bat-rockets

perform as well as they should.

Experimental
heel-and-toe Bat-rockets?

They haven't been tested yet.

Let's not put off till tomorrow
what we can do today, Robin.

As I begin the countdown,
slowly reach

for the heal and toe Bat-rocket
controls in your utility belt.

Remember, any sudden movement,
will disturb our equilibrium

'and we can't afford
to sink much further.'

Now, on the count of zero,
activate your Bat-rockets.

Roger.

zero minus five..

...zero minus four..

...zero minus three..

...zero minus two..

...zero minus one..

...zero.

Later, at The Riddler's hideout
in the soon to be opened

Noman Jigsaw Puzzle Factory

the magic of electronics
provides The Riddler

and his band
of malevolent yeoman

with a fascinating account
of their latest criminal coup.

[instrumental music]

(man on TV)
'All of Gotham City is aghast today'

'at the daring daylight robbery
in Gotham City Square Park.'

In which, one million dollars
of charity funds accumulated

in Batman's honor, was snatched
from the hands of the poor

by the light-fingered Riddler.

Light-fingered.

Yes, that's what I am.

Light-fingered,
nimble, quick, wonderful.

(man on TV)
'In a joint statement, issued just minutes ago'

'Commissioner Gordon
and Batman and Robin'

promised an intensified search

for the perpetrators
of this shameless crime

'and the speedy recovery
of the charity funds.'

The following riddle,
left at the scene of the crime

provides their only clue.

"When is an eagle's nest
blessed best?"

[intense music]

That mealy-mouthed faker

issued a joint statement
with Batman and Robin, did he?

Well, he knows and we know

that the Caked Crusaders
are defunct

departed, demised...dead!

What if he isn't lying?

- What if Batman and Robin are--
- Alive?

Impossible, dear Anna Gram.

Even if it were possible,
it couldn't matter less.

One more cunning caper
and I'll have the price

of Professor Charm's
demolecularizer.

Then, let them send
a regiment of Batman against me.

When is an eagle's nest,
blessed best?

Seems to me that any nest
is most blessed

when there're little ones in it.

- Yes.
- Or nest eggs.

Riddler's after a nest egg.

Which leaves me to speculate
that he intends to strike

an eagle's nest
somewhere here in Gotham City.

- Do you agree, Robin?
- I agree.

But, there hasn't been an eagle
in Gotham City in 75 years

e-except in a zoo.

Perhaps not, Chief O'Hara,
but I know of at least

one eagle's nest.

Where's that, Batman?

A nightclub.

High atop
the Gotham City State Building

known as The Eyrie.

Of course, The Eyrie
or eagle's nest.

A favorite watering place
for Gotham City's elite.

And a perfect target
for an aquiline attack.

Aquiline.

That's a very descriptive word,
Commissioner Gordon.

Are you acquainted
with the terminology, Robin?

Aquiline, of or like an eagle

from aquila, Latin for eagle.

Yes.

And what,
Latin eagle now lives

resides or nests
here in Gotham City?

Anthony Aquilo, the exile
dictator from South America.

And a multi-millionaire
who's rumored to keep at least

one million dollars in cash
in his wall safe at all times.

That must be it, Batman.

How could The Riddler
resist such a treasure?

There's treasure at both ends
of the rainbow, commissioner.

While Robin and I dash

to Anthony Aquilo's
palatial penthouse apartment

you and your men,
in blue, protect the area.

An ingenious tactic.

Thank you, commissioner

and good luck
to all of us.

Meanwhile, in Anthony Aquilo's
palatial penthouse reproduction

of his former plantation home

The Riddler and his bearers
lurk in the underbrush.

Haa-ha-ha, there it is,
you near-sighted nitwits

the answer
to a hard-heart's dream.

Don't stand there staring
at it, the loot sack, please.

Fill it, quickly.

(Batman)
'Riddler, come out of the bush and surrender.'

As a duly deputized peace
officer, I order you to drop

that sack, and give yourself up.

Impossible!

Fifteen feet
of lethal quicksand.

They sure don't look
defunct to me, Riddler.

Or demised, departed, and dead.

How?

(Riddler)
'How did they survive?'

Right was
on our side, that's how.

Get them.

[intense music]

The loot sack, Riddler.

And then we'll talk
about the money

you took from
the poor and needy.

No, we don't, Boy Wonder.

Because you and your
deputized friend

are gonna watch me
walk out of here.

Follow me,
then I'll show you why.

At ease, old chum,
I suspect

'Riddler's prisoner
is Senor Aquila himself.'

Brilliant deduction, hold this.

Yes, the eagle himself
caged like a big bird

and, Batman, his life
is in your hands. Thank you.

I prepared this tricky cage,
in case the news report was true

and you two showed up.

In mere moments,
an explosive charge inside

that ticking green box,
will send Senor Aquila

and his palatial penthouse

higher than any eagle
has ever flown.

Unless?

Unless you and, uh, junior here
unlock the secret

to these baffling bars
and disarm the bomb inside.

Well, adios amigos.

Better get to work.
Ta-ta, huh?

Are we gonna let them
walk out just like that?

We have no choice.

Senor Aquila has many friends
in his home

and we cannot risk
an international incident.

I suppose you're right.

This particular puzzle case
doesn't seem to conform

to the usual
puzzle cage pattern.

Some of the medieval
puzzle cages were designed

so that all the intersecting
rods were dependent

upon the axis
of only one supporting rod.

Disengaging that one rod..

...unlocks the entire cage.

Stand clear, Robin.

Curious, but decidedly
an explosive.

"To whom it may concern."

"If the tail fits, wear it."

There you are, professor.
Three million dollars.

I must admit, Mr. Riddler,
you are a man of your word.

Where do we go
to pick up the demolecularizer?

Oh, I have it with me
at all times.

- This is the demolecularizer?
- Mm-hm.

You want me to pay
three million dollars

for an 89 cent
pencil flashlight?

That "89 cents pencil
flashlight"

as you call it, Mr. Riddler

is in reality a highly
sophisticated weapon

'which took
a life time to develop.'

Powerful enough to disrupt

the molecular structure
of matter

yet so simply designed
that it can be recharged

by plugging it in any
household electrical outlet.

How does it work?

Um.

Watch that, uh, green derby

'on the chair over there.'

[demolecularizer buzzing]

It's good.

It disappeared.

That thing really works.

As I said it would.

Make it come back now.

That isn't yet possible.

I haven't even begun work
on the molecular restorer

for lack of funds.

Well, now you have
three million dollars..

...and I have Gotham City

right by the throat.

Get Commissioner Gordon
on the phone.

He should be the first to know.

[laughs]

[instrumental music]

Another crisis, commissioner?

A rather enigmatic phone call
from The Riddler.

He suggested that we keep

our eye
on Marshall Coley's statue.

Do you think he'd dare
desecrate the statue

of our revered war hero,
right here in Coley Square?

(Batman)
'A life of crime is more in The Riddler's

moral fiber to a frayed strand,
commissioner.

He may have little respect

for the memory
of the great Marshall Coley.

This could be
another of Riddler's ruses.

Quite true, Robin.

Holy Houdini!

(Commissioner)
'Great slithering snakes!'

'The marshal, he's gone.'

Uncanny.

Careful, Chief O'Hara,
whatever, unknown force

was employed in dematerializing
Marshall Coley's statue

may have left a contaminating
residue on the pedestal.

Begorrah, you're right.
Thanks, Caped Crusader.

Someone here called Batman?

Yes, I'm Batman.

Telegram.

Another Riddler-gram.

It's an ultimatum.

Unless Gotham City
is declared an open city

and all criminal statutes
rescinded within two hours..

...Police Headquarters
will disappear as surely

and as quickly
as Marshall Coley's statue.

That swaggerin' peacock!

Oh, he's only bluffin'.

(Gordon)
'I'm afraid not, chief.'

Listen to this.

"If the city fathers
refuse to capitulate

"that the police headquarters
is gone

"building after
building will disappear.

Until they do."

To confound us further
the telegram ends with a riddle.

"What is it that travels
on all fours in the morning

"and two legs at noon
and three at twilight?

If you intend to follow me, add
the answer to the other three."

What can we do, Batman?

It saddens me,
commissioner, but..

I just don't know.

[instrumental music]

Gosh, Batman, I'm sure
hung up on this riddle.

I'll help you just as soon
as I collate these figures

from the remote Bat-computer.

Now, if my original premise
was correct

and that machine has done
a man's job.

Man's job?

Man's job!

Man!

That's it, Batman!

Man travels on all
fours in the morning

of his life,
or as an infant.

And on two legs
at noon or as an adult.

And with a cane or three legs
in the twilight of his life.

(Batman)
'Congratulations, Robin. Now's let's concentrate'

on the last part
of Riddler's challenge.

If you intend to follow me, add
the answer to the other three.

Select the key words from each
of the first three riddles.

Page, banquet

eagle's nest and man.

For instance, the letter "P"
in the word "Page"

is the 16th letter
in the alphabet.

Using numerical positions in the
alphabet as a common denominator

we then add the number

two for "banquet"
and five for "eagles"

and thirteen for "man".

And the total?

- Thirty six.
- Thirty six.

Thirty six inches
in a yard or three feet.

And who has three feet? You?

No one.

Or no man.

I seem to recall
a recent announcements

of a factory
opening by that name.

Robin, activate remote
Bat-computer again.

[beeping]

Noman Jigsaw Puzzle Factory

on the corner
of Shady Glade and fifth.

Excellent.

- Commissioner?
- Yes, Batman.

Could you arrange for
the immediate delivery

of four one hundred pound
sacks of sodium dichlorite

to the Bat-copter?
I'll explain later.

Consider it done.
Anything else?

Yes, do not..

I repeat do not capitulate
to any of Riddler's demands

until you hear from me
under any circumstances.

You have my word
on that too, Batman.

Good.

What are we going to do with
four one hundred pound sacks

of sodium dichlorite, Batman?

Checkmate Riddler! Hopefully.

While the Caped Crusaders
race against approaching doom

their impatient adversary frets
away the remaining minutes.

How can you lamebrains play
cards at the time of this?

Gee, Riddler honey, what else
is there to do?

Turn the television on.

That fat-headed police
commissioner has little

less than half an hour
before he starts looking

for new headquarters

Chief O'Hara, I'm Bud Furillo,
the Gotham City Herald

is there anything
I can tell my readers

about your investigation?

Well, we've moved every piece
of furniture in this building.

We've looked under every rug
but nothing could be found.

What is it that you and your
elite squad are looking for?

Well, we don't exactly know

'but will keep looking
till the very last second.'

(Bud)
'Thank you, chief.'

Poor Chief O'Hara, knocking
himself out, looking all over

the building for
a demolecularizer

when its hidden right there
in the commissioner's office.

- It is?
- When did you do that?

On my way back
from Marshall Coley Square

I plugged it into an ordinary
electrical outlet behind

the Commissioner's couch.

If the commissioner
follows my instructions

and issues a
capitulation proclamation

at precisely 4:55 pm,
I'll call him and tell him

how to deactivate
the automatic trigger.

- How?
- Simple.

Turn the wall switch
to the off position.

[laughing]

Meanwhile, the Dynamic Duo
wings across the city

with their cargo
of sodium dichlorite.

[intense music]

(man on TV)
'The moment is almost at hand now'

'when the city must
announce its decision.'

Capitulation will amount
to official sanction

of wanton lawlessness.

Standing fast will
prompt unholy destruction.

We understand that
Commissioner Gordon

has refused to
leave the building.

Wonderful! Let him go
down with his building.

[laughing]

There is very good time
left now.

[instrumental music]

No time to use the stairs.
we'll have to try the Bat-rope.

Stand clear.

(Man on TV)
'Our telephoto lens is providing the view of police headquarters'

'which you see on your screen.'

'Except for Commissioner Gordon'

'Chief O'Hara and his elite bomb
squad, the building is empty.'

All we can do
is watch and wait.

Watch and wait, Gotham City!
There's more to come.

As the seconds tick away,
the clouds above

police headquarters
seem to be darkening

as though a storm were imminent.

(man on TV)
'Just five seconds to go.'

'Four..'

'...three..'

'...two, one.'

[thunder rumbling]

What happened?

The demolecularizer.

It didn't work.

I knew it was
a cheap flashlight.

Flashlight.
Flashlight!

Try again, Riddler.

Didn't your mother ever tell you
not to play with electricity?

You two.
How did you do it?

The super charge electrical
power of that lightning bolt

neutralized the effect
of your fiendish weapon.

How did you know the lightning
would strike at the right time?

We arranged for it.

Cloud seeding with 400
pounds of sodium dichlorite

fortunately my
calculations proved correct.

As usual your riddles
led us right to you.

You've made the mistake of
being predictable yourselves

with your legendary
window entrances.

Riddle me this.

When is a floor like a puzzle?

[beeps]

[instrumental music]

[groaning]

Help, Batman!

[music continues]

[beeping]

Oh.

Nice catch, chief.

Let go of me,
you blue coated baboon!

I'll bet she's
the toughest one of the bunch!

She's the only
one still kicking.

[screaming]

Coming forward voluntarily
with this stolen charity money

you should tip
the scales of justice

in your favor, professor.

No man can live with
the wails of hungry children

on his conscience.

Professor, when you
paid your debt to society

you'll be able to continue
your scientific studies

under the wing of the Gotham
City Science Institute.

I don't know how
to thank you, Batman

for arranging my membership.

You can thank our
friend Bruce Wayne.

(Batman)
'Mr. Wayne persuaded the membership'

to lower the customary
educational requirements.

Robin, we should take this money
to the Wayne Foundation

before they close
the business hours.

Roger!

Amazing man!

Do you know who
is under that mask of his?

To ask, professor, who he is

is nowhere near as important
as where he is..

...at all times.

Next week, Cesar Romero
returns as The Joker.

[theme music]

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Batman

� Na na na na na

� Batman

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