Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,271 --> 00:00:04,587
[ANNOUNCER] The following is
a Fox special presentation.
2
00:00:04,601 --> 00:00:06,839
Live from the Dolby-Mucinex theater
3
00:00:06,882 --> 00:00:09,216
in Hollywood, California...
4
00:00:09,260 --> 00:00:11,260
♪
5
00:00:11,303 --> 00:00:13,220
...the biggest stars of stage,
6
00:00:13,264 --> 00:00:15,889
screen, politics and sports...
7
00:00:15,933 --> 00:00:18,225
have all come out for
this landmark night
8
00:00:18,269 --> 00:00:20,728
in television history.
9
00:00:20,771 --> 00:00:25,873
A once-in-a-lifetime event
36 years in the making!
10
00:00:25,908 --> 00:00:28,402
It's the Simpsons series finale!
11
00:00:28,446 --> 00:00:30,195
[APPLAUSE]
12
00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:32,448
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
13
00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:36,577
And now, your host for tonight...
14
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:39,121
Conan O'Brien!
15
00:00:39,165 --> 00:00:41,165
[APPLAUSE, CHEERING]
16
00:00:43,665 --> 00:00:45,627
Thank you. Yes, thank you.
17
00:00:45,671 --> 00:00:47,379
It's such an honor to be with you all
18
00:00:47,423 --> 00:00:50,174
for the series finale of the Simpsons.
19
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:52,342
I knew I was the right man for the job
20
00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:54,428
because I've hosted the last episode
21
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:57,764
of three of my own shows, and counting.
22
00:00:57,808 --> 00:00:59,683
[LAUGHTER]
23
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:04,938
Well, it's true,
Fox has decided to end the Simpsons.
24
00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:07,524
This show was such a special
part of my early career,
25
00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:09,735
so being here means the world to me.
26
00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:13,405
Also, I left a sweater in
the writers room in 1993.
27
00:01:13,449 --> 00:01:16,074
This is the only way
they'll let me get it back.
28
00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:18,744
[APPLAUSE]
29
00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:20,746
This theater is full
of the many celebrities
30
00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:22,873
who have appeared on the
Simpsons over the years
31
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:24,499
and who have come to say farewell.
32
00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:26,001
We got you for scale then,
33
00:01:26,045 --> 00:01:27,586
we're getting you for free tonight.
34
00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:30,797
Hey, give yourselves a hand,
you poor, rich chumps!
35
00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:32,341
[APPLAUSE]
36
00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:34,217
And, of course, we're also joined
37
00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:37,763
by the stars of Fox's
many live-action hits!
38
00:01:38,974 --> 00:01:42,726
I also won the Masked
Singer as Disco-Pus!
39
00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,561
[PRODUCER] That hasn't aired yet,
genius.
40
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:46,271
You've ruined the whole season.
41
00:01:46,315 --> 00:01:48,190
Ah, shoot!
42
00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:51,276
Over the years, the Simpsons
have had hundreds of adventures,
43
00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:53,070
visited dozens of countries,
44
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,488
most of which still exist.
45
00:01:54,573 --> 00:01:56,323
And Bart Simpson has remained
46
00:01:56,367 --> 00:01:58,492
the world's longest-serving
ten-year-old.
47
00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:01,078
So, why end the Simpsons now?
48
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:02,537
Not many people know this,
49
00:02:02,581 --> 00:02:05,207
but Fox has been trying
to end it for years.
50
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:08,001
When the very first
episode aired in 1989,
51
00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:09,628
the viewers agreed on one thing:
52
00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:12,047
It wasn't as funny as it used to be.
53
00:02:12,091 --> 00:02:13,507
And their expressions of hatred
54
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:15,050
could serve as a history
55
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,260
of modern communication technology.
56
00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:18,637
[LAUGHTER]
57
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:22,099
Fox executives,
unaccustomed to criticism of any kind,
58
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,809
immediately caved to public pressure
59
00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:27,104
and decided to end the Simpsons in 1990.
60
00:02:27,147 --> 00:02:29,106
Here's a never-before-seen clip
61
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,858
of the first attempt at a series finale,
62
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:33,402
"Bart the Daredevil."
63
00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:36,238
I'm gonna make it, I'm gonna make it!
64
00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:38,073
This is the greatest thrill of my life!
65
00:02:38,117 --> 00:02:39,699
I'm king of the world!
66
00:02:39,743 --> 00:02:41,743
Woohoo! Woohoo! I...
67
00:02:41,787 --> 00:02:43,829
[SCREAMS]
68
00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:46,373
[GRUNTING]
69
00:02:49,128 --> 00:02:51,294
[GRUNTING ECHOES]
70
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:55,715
[PANTING]
71
00:02:55,717 --> 00:02:56,967
Ow!
72
00:02:59,972 --> 00:03:03,432
Dad? Dad, speak to me.
73
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:06,685
No!
74
00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:10,689
[CHILDREN SCREAMING]
75
00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:11,898
[APPLAUSE]
76
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:14,025
However,
before this grim finale could air,
77
00:03:14,069 --> 00:03:16,987
Rupert Murdoch got a
ten-million-dollar helium bill
78
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,865
for the Bart balloon in the
Macy's Thanksgiving parade.
79
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:22,451
So, Fox had to keep making new episodes
80
00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:23,869
to amortize the cost.
81
00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:26,746
Thus, the quest to end
the Simpsons went on.
82
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:29,416
In fact, many now-classic episodes
83
00:03:29,460 --> 00:03:32,586
were originally conceived
as series finales.
84
00:03:34,006 --> 00:03:36,006
Ow, my legs!
85
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,966
This is the worst pain ever!
86
00:03:39,136 --> 00:03:40,927
Nothin' at all!
87
00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:42,762
Bravo.
88
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:44,222
Woohoo!
89
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:45,557
[HOMER YELPS]
90
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,772
But in 2007, efforts to end the show
91
00:03:52,816 --> 00:03:55,442
were put on hold after
the massive global success
92
00:03:55,527 --> 00:03:57,694
of the Simpsons movie...
93
00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:59,196
Porno parody.
94
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:01,823
The cast of which is here tonight.
95
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:03,492
[APPLAUSE]
96
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:05,785
But now that Fox has rebranded itself
97
00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:07,912
as a dating service for cow-tippers,
98
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:10,623
the time has come to
finally end the Simpsons.
99
00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,667
But how? The bar had been raised so high
100
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:14,252
by the classic finales
101
00:04:14,296 --> 00:04:16,963
of Mad Men, Breaking Bad,
and The Sopranos,
102
00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:19,841
and lowered by the
legacy-ruining farewells
103
00:04:19,885 --> 00:04:23,219
of Seinfeld, Lost and The Sopranos.
104
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:25,555
The producers wracked their
brains to create a finale
105
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:27,724
that would satisfy the show's many fans
106
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:29,517
and many, many haters.
107
00:04:29,561 --> 00:04:31,770
Then they came up with the perfect plan.
108
00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:34,063
Foist the job onto somebody else.
109
00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:36,441
Meet that somebody else.
110
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:37,650
I give you the latest
111
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:40,195
in machine-learning
artificial intelligence,
112
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:42,739
Hack-GPT.
113
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,949
This cutting-edge
breakthrough in plagiarism
114
00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:47,494
has been programmed to write,
animate and voice
115
00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:49,537
the perfect finale for the Simpsons.
116
00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:51,831
One that wraps up
the characters' storylines
117
00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:53,625
in emotionally satisfying ways,
118
00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:57,003
but won't damage the most
important legacy of the show...
119
00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:58,922
The 2026 grand opening
120
00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:02,091
of Homer Simpson's claim-jumping,
Yukon-rumbling
121
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:05,637
Rock-N-Rollercoaster
at Disneyland Shanghai!
122
00:05:06,431 --> 00:05:07,755
[APPLAUSE]
123
00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,849
To create the ultimate finale,
124
00:05:09,935 --> 00:05:13,019
the A.I. has been fed
every Simpsons episode
125
00:05:13,104 --> 00:05:17,023
and the last episode of every
television series ever made.
126
00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:18,358
[WHIRS, BEEPS]
127
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:21,569
Hack-GPT is now performing
billions of computations
128
00:05:21,613 --> 00:05:23,404
to create the perfect story.
129
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,448
Who knows how long this process will...
130
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:26,866
[HACK-GPT] Finale complete.
131
00:05:26,910 --> 00:05:29,077
Oh. Well, that was...
that was really quick.
132
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,787
Well, let's see what we got.
133
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,831
♪
134
00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:38,586
♪ The Simpsons ♪
135
00:05:38,630 --> 00:05:40,672
[FEMALE AUTOMATED VOICE] Finale.
136
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:45,718
There's my special little birthday guy!
137
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:47,929
I'm so pumped for my party tonight.
138
00:05:47,973 --> 00:05:50,723
How many people are coming?
50? A thousand?
139
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:54,686
I am a little concerned
I haven't gotten any RSVPs.
140
00:05:54,729 --> 00:05:57,272
Homer, you did mail
the invitations, right?
141
00:05:57,315 --> 00:06:00,316
Marge, I could lie and tell
you what you want to hear,
142
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,609
but I won't.
143
00:06:01,653 --> 00:06:02,694
I mailed the invitations,
144
00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:04,445
and the reason no one is coming is...
145
00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:06,322
because everybody hates Bart.
146
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:07,991
Huh?
147
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:10,618
[MARGE] Homer!
148
00:06:10,662 --> 00:06:12,954
Ugh. Your selfishness is going to be
149
00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:16,624
topic number one with our
new therapist tonight.
150
00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:19,335
Woo-hoo! No time to talk
about my problem drinking
151
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,170
and solution snacking.
152
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:22,380
Oh, great.
153
00:06:22,424 --> 00:06:24,090
I have eight hours to hand these out
154
00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:25,466
to all my friends
155
00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:28,052
or my birthday party's gonna be...
156
00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:29,888
ruined!
157
00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:33,349
You ran billions of computations,
158
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,351
and that's what you come up with?
159
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:38,271
Homer screws up Bart's birthday party?
160
00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:40,189
[HACK-GPT] Got anything better?
161
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,774
Uh...
162
00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:43,822
I think the birthday party could work.
163
00:06:47,990 --> 00:06:51,784
Okay, the Simpsons series finale!
[CHUCKLES]
164
00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:53,995
The A.I. has worked
out a satisfying story
165
00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:56,956
full of sweet character
moments and happy endings.
166
00:06:58,209 --> 00:06:59,959
[WHISPERING] Are we sure
about Bart's birthday?
167
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,463
Birthdays are relatable, Conan.
168
00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:06,716
And the lost invitations
raised the stakes.
169
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:10,553
Are you... A.I. network executives?
170
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:13,348
We have been programmed
with every network note
171
00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:15,308
in the history of television.
172
00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:17,101
We have some thoughts.
173
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:20,021
Maybe Marge has an aspirational new job?
174
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:22,523
Not this, but owns a cupcake store?
175
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:23,983
To piggyback off that,
176
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:27,153
let's remind the viewer
that Homer likes food.
177
00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:28,738
If we go down that road,
178
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:31,074
can Moe be played by Topher Grace?
179
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,283
He's a friend.
180
00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:34,452
Shut up. Just play the show.
181
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:35,954
Bart's birthday!
182
00:07:37,332 --> 00:07:38,957
Here you go, come to my party.
183
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,668
Wendell, Lewis,
sunglasses kid with no name.
184
00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:44,462
Uter! Look who's alive!
185
00:07:44,756 --> 00:07:47,548
Students,
I've called this assembly because...
186
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:50,134
today is my last day as your principal.
187
00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,219
[ALL GASP]
188
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,262
You are looking at the new headmaster
189
00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,932
of the Sacramento Obedience
Academy for the Meek,
190
00:07:56,017 --> 00:07:57,683
where I'll no doubt find a whole new
191
00:07:57,727 --> 00:08:00,353
eclectic cast of characters
to interact with.
192
00:08:00,396 --> 00:08:03,189
Also, groundskeeper Willie
will be my roommate.
193
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,650
What an odd couple we'll make.
194
00:08:05,693 --> 00:08:06,943
No more Skinner?
195
00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:09,320
Oh, man,
this is the best birthday present ever.
196
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:10,863
And who knows,
197
00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:14,450
maybe I'll make an occasional
appearance in Sacramento.
198
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:17,703
[CHUCKLES] I look forward
to one hijink or more
199
00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:20,790
as part of this delightful
midseason replacement
200
00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:22,917
of the retiring principal.
201
00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:25,586
School dismissed.
202
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:26,963
Wait, don't leave.
203
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,048
I still have more birthday invitations.
204
00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:31,425
I'm going to miss this place.
205
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:33,678
Huh?
206
00:08:33,721 --> 00:08:35,304
- _
- [CROW CAWS]
207
00:08:36,099 --> 00:08:37,348
[PHONE CHIMES]
208
00:08:37,433 --> 00:08:41,143
Hmm. My bank said they'd
never ask for my password.
209
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:44,230
But look who's come
crawling back for it now.
210
00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:45,982
[LAUGHS] Idiots.
211
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:48,901
Everyone, I have an important
announcement to make.
212
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:51,320
Mr. Burns is dead.
213
00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:56,033
And now for the reading of the will.
214
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:58,202
"I, Charles Montgomery Burns,
215
00:08:58,246 --> 00:09:03,833
"do hereby leave the
entirety of my fortune to...
216
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:06,669
the Springfield power plant employees."
217
00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,921
[GASPING, CHEERING]
218
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:10,840
This is unbelievable!
219
00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:13,050
This is life-changing! This is...
220
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:16,721
Another classic bit of
Monty Burns monkey-shinery!
221
00:09:16,764 --> 00:09:19,098
- [EMPLOYEES EXCLAIMING]
- What's going on?
222
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:22,935
[CHUCKLES] The looks
on your gullible faces.
223
00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:24,645
Now the electric company wants me
224
00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,939
to pay my bill in gift cards?
225
00:09:26,983 --> 00:09:29,066
Welcome to the future.
226
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:30,318
[SCREAMS]
227
00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:34,447
[MOANING]
228
00:09:36,909 --> 00:09:38,909
My God, he's really dead.
229
00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:41,412
Legally, this prank will is binding.
230
00:09:41,456 --> 00:09:42,705
You're all filthy rich.
231
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,582
[CHEERING, WHOOPING]
232
00:09:44,625 --> 00:09:46,709
Oh, sir, thank you.
233
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:49,503
Now we can be together forever.
234
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:55,009
[EMPLOYEES CHANTING] Homer!
Homer! Homer!
235
00:09:56,512 --> 00:09:59,805
[CHUCKLES] I'm gonna miss this place.
236
00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:04,643
Homer! Homer! Homer!
237
00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:06,103
That's weird.
238
00:10:06,509 --> 00:10:07,689
_
239
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:10,191
[MOANS] Call the doctor!
240
00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:11,942
The baby's coming!
241
00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:16,072
Help me, OB-Gyn Kenobi,
you're my only hope!
242
00:10:16,115 --> 00:10:18,732
Wait, you guys are having a baby?
243
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,826
Not without a doctor!
244
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,079
How about the only licensed midwife
245
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:26,248
to win 16 WWE championships?
246
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,709
John Cena? Wrestler, actor, rapper,
247
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:30,252
prolific wish-granter?
248
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:32,755
I'm also coming out with
a line of Panini presses.
249
00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,423
The Cen-ini.
250
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:36,926
What the hell is John
Cena doing in Springfield?
251
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:39,470
I'm in town for the launch
party of Otto the bus driver's
252
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:41,680
line of THC energy drinks.
253
00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:43,974
[GLUGGING, GRUNTS]
254
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,101
THC!
255
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:46,977
I need sterile gloves, hot water,
256
00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:49,188
and something to cut the cord, stat!
257
00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:53,692
Klingon bat'leth?
258
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,277
Nice.
259
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:57,822
♪
260
00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:07,706
Who can't see me?
261
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:09,291
You can't see me.
262
00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,589
I don't need toys anymore.
263
00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:19,635
I've got the ultimate limited
edition collectible right here.
264
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:23,472
I think I'm going to miss this place.
265
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:26,684
What is happening?
266
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:29,687
Milhouse, today is crazy.
267
00:11:29,772 --> 00:11:31,480
Skinner got a new job,
268
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:32,940
Mr. Burns died,
269
00:11:32,984 --> 00:11:34,859
swole funny-man John Cena delivered
270
00:11:34,902 --> 00:11:36,735
comic book guy's baby.
271
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:38,487
Feels weird, don't you think?
272
00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:39,864
I don't know.
273
00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:42,700
My new medicine doesn't
really let me feel stuff.
274
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:45,786
Milhouse, we have amazing news.
275
00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:47,905
Pack your bags, buddy.
276
00:11:47,948 --> 00:11:49,740
We're moving to Atlanta.
277
00:11:49,825 --> 00:11:52,409
The guys at Sure Fine Why Not
Records heard my old demo,
278
00:11:52,453 --> 00:11:54,912
and they want me to cut a full album.
279
00:11:54,955 --> 00:11:58,123
And your father's new
musician health insurance
280
00:11:58,167 --> 00:12:00,584
is going to pay for your Lasik.
281
00:12:00,628 --> 00:12:01,960
Whoa!
282
00:12:02,004 --> 00:12:03,879
No more glasses?
283
00:12:05,341 --> 00:12:07,257
Look out, Hotlanta.
284
00:12:07,301 --> 00:12:09,468
You ain't ready for this glow-up.
285
00:12:09,511 --> 00:12:10,802
Later, Bart. Catch you
286
00:12:10,846 --> 00:12:14,181
in our increasingly distant
online interactions.
287
00:12:14,224 --> 00:12:17,267
[SIGHS] I'm gonna miss this place.
288
00:12:18,395 --> 00:12:21,229
Why do people keep doing that?
289
00:12:21,232 --> 00:12:23,232
_
290
00:12:23,233 --> 00:12:25,150
A lifetime of monogamy.
291
00:12:25,194 --> 00:12:26,902
Oh, yeah!
292
00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:28,528
Closing time.
293
00:12:28,572 --> 00:12:31,657
Ooh, I'm gonna miss this place.
294
00:12:33,384 --> 00:12:34,916
_
295
00:12:39,215 --> 00:12:41,792
- _
- I'm going to miss this fire.
296
00:12:43,128 --> 00:12:44,419
Huh?
297
00:12:44,505 --> 00:12:45,671
Mom, Dad.
298
00:12:45,673 --> 00:12:47,965
Something super weird is going on.
299
00:12:48,008 --> 00:12:50,759
Son, we need to talk to you.
300
00:12:50,761 --> 00:12:52,636
Oh, man, now what?
301
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:56,223
Your father and I have
been in couples counseling
302
00:12:56,266 --> 00:13:00,102
and we just had the
most amazing session.
303
00:13:00,145 --> 00:13:02,479
We worked through so much pain.
304
00:13:02,523 --> 00:13:05,148
I've been withholding
affection because...
305
00:13:05,192 --> 00:13:06,942
I was never given any.
306
00:13:06,986 --> 00:13:08,610
And I enabled it!
307
00:13:08,654 --> 00:13:11,363
[BOTH CRYING]
308
00:13:11,407 --> 00:13:14,783
We love each other as we are.
309
00:13:14,827 --> 00:13:18,245
And we love you exactly as you are.
310
00:13:18,288 --> 00:13:21,373
You kids are gonna be
living in a functional,
311
00:13:21,417 --> 00:13:24,042
trauma-free household and I'm gonna take
312
00:13:24,086 --> 00:13:25,711
that miracle new diet drug.
313
00:13:25,754 --> 00:13:28,922
I'll be skinny,
but still have a huge head.
314
00:13:28,966 --> 00:13:33,334
From now on,
you're going to see a lot of changes.
315
00:13:33,369 --> 00:13:35,512
Change? That's it.
316
00:13:35,556 --> 00:13:37,014
Everything's changing.
317
00:13:37,099 --> 00:13:38,432
And I don't like it.
318
00:13:38,434 --> 00:13:42,144
[GASPS] I think Maggie's
about to say her first word.
319
00:13:42,187 --> 00:13:44,271
♪ La-la-la-la! ♪
320
00:13:44,314 --> 00:13:46,231
Not listening!
321
00:13:46,233 --> 00:13:48,900
So that just happened.
322
00:13:48,944 --> 00:13:50,193
Nothing is changing!
323
00:13:50,195 --> 00:13:51,445
[ALL GASPING]
324
00:13:51,488 --> 00:13:53,280
What the hell is going on?!
325
00:13:53,323 --> 00:13:55,073
I did not program this.
326
00:13:55,075 --> 00:13:57,242
The character Bart Simpson
327
00:13:57,286 --> 00:13:59,119
has become self-aware
328
00:13:59,163 --> 00:14:01,288
and is rejecting the story.
329
00:14:01,373 --> 00:14:04,082
But it's a great finale:
Sweet endings and spinoffs
330
00:14:04,126 --> 00:14:05,792
and everyone changing for the better.
331
00:14:05,836 --> 00:14:09,421
Bart Simpson refuses to
accept the idea of change.
332
00:14:09,465 --> 00:14:10,756
Uh, folks?
333
00:14:10,799 --> 00:14:13,300
Obviously,
things have gone a little off track,
334
00:14:13,343 --> 00:14:15,552
but that's live animation for you.
335
00:14:15,596 --> 00:14:17,387
Would it fix it if I reset you
336
00:14:17,431 --> 00:14:19,181
by turning you off and
then back on again?
337
00:14:19,224 --> 00:14:21,266
Touch me and I'll have
H.R. on you so fast
338
00:14:21,310 --> 00:14:22,809
your wig will spin.
339
00:14:22,853 --> 00:14:24,936
It's not a wig, it's a system.
340
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:32,861
Why is everything changing
for the better? This is horrible.
341
00:14:33,906 --> 00:14:35,280
Dad?
342
00:14:36,033 --> 00:14:38,200
Change!
343
00:14:38,994 --> 00:14:40,368
[PANTING]
344
00:14:41,163 --> 00:14:43,914
Real son.
345
00:14:43,957 --> 00:14:46,625
More change!
346
00:14:46,626 --> 00:14:50,426
_
347
00:14:50,464 --> 00:14:51,671
Oh...
348
00:14:52,289 --> 00:14:54,966
Wait, I know one person in Springfield
349
00:14:55,010 --> 00:14:57,135
who will never change.
350
00:14:57,179 --> 00:14:58,720
Hey hey!
351
00:14:58,764 --> 00:15:00,055
Next card.
352
00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:01,515
Hey hey!
353
00:15:01,517 --> 00:15:02,526
Krusty!
354
00:15:02,559 --> 00:15:04,434
You're still doing your show, right?
355
00:15:04,478 --> 00:15:05,894
You know it, kid.
356
00:15:05,938 --> 00:15:08,105
All my classic bits...
357
00:15:08,148 --> 00:15:09,189
[EXHALES]
358
00:15:09,233 --> 00:15:10,524
...one last time
359
00:15:10,609 --> 00:15:14,778
on the "Krusty Show Last
Episode Ever Spectacular."
360
00:15:15,781 --> 00:15:17,572
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
361
00:15:17,616 --> 00:15:19,241
No!
362
00:15:19,284 --> 00:15:22,119
A classic series like
this can never end.
363
00:15:22,162 --> 00:15:23,370
I've changed, kid.
364
00:15:23,413 --> 00:15:24,955
Even I can't run the same material
365
00:15:24,998 --> 00:15:26,623
into the ground forever.
366
00:15:26,667 --> 00:15:27,999
Ay, caramba!
367
00:15:28,043 --> 00:15:29,292
Haw-haw!
368
00:15:29,378 --> 00:15:31,169
- [BURPS]
- Good glavin!
369
00:15:31,213 --> 00:15:32,879
Hi, everybody!
370
00:15:32,923 --> 00:15:34,548
[CHUCKLING]
371
00:15:34,591 --> 00:15:37,884
[SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
372
00:15:37,928 --> 00:15:40,262
♪
373
00:15:40,305 --> 00:15:42,514
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]
374
00:15:43,517 --> 00:15:45,642
♪
375
00:15:47,720 --> 00:15:50,355
Wait, if I could somehow
ruin Krusty's finale,
376
00:15:50,399 --> 00:15:52,732
they can't air it,
and the show can never end.
377
00:15:52,776 --> 00:15:54,192
That's it.
378
00:15:54,236 --> 00:15:56,903
Cheeks, don't fail me now.
379
00:15:56,947 --> 00:16:00,657
How's this for a satisfying ending?
380
00:16:00,701 --> 00:16:02,492
[AUDIENCE GASPING]
381
00:16:03,912 --> 00:16:05,704
Bart, what's going on with you?
382
00:16:05,747 --> 00:16:07,122
Are you all right?
383
00:16:07,166 --> 00:16:09,457
Lis, I know
you're gonna think I'm crazy,
384
00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:11,751
but something super-duper weird
385
00:16:11,795 --> 00:16:13,545
is happening today.
386
00:16:13,589 --> 00:16:15,881
You mean how everyone's
changing for the better,
387
00:16:15,924 --> 00:16:17,716
and moving on with their lives?
388
00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:18,759
So I'm not crazy.
389
00:16:18,802 --> 00:16:19,885
You see it, too.
390
00:16:19,928 --> 00:16:21,511
Things do feel different.
391
00:16:21,555 --> 00:16:24,431
Almost like a book
that's slowly closing.
392
00:16:24,474 --> 00:16:25,932
So you'll help me stop it?
393
00:16:25,976 --> 00:16:29,019
Well, I'd like to, but I just won
394
00:16:29,062 --> 00:16:31,354
a junior Juilliard Jazz scholarship
395
00:16:31,398 --> 00:16:34,107
and a MacArthur preteen genius grant.
396
00:16:34,151 --> 00:16:36,151
[GROANS] Just get me out of here
397
00:16:36,195 --> 00:16:38,153
before any more stupid endings happen!
398
00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:40,405
Simpson, we are finally sending you
399
00:16:40,449 --> 00:16:42,782
to juvie and throwing away the keys...
400
00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:45,994
is what I would say if
I wasn't about to start
401
00:16:46,038 --> 00:16:48,788
a whole new chapter in my life.
402
00:16:48,832 --> 00:16:50,290
[SHOUTS]
403
00:16:50,334 --> 00:16:52,209
I'm joining the Chicago PD.
404
00:16:52,252 --> 00:16:54,419
I'm gonna lead the A.D.U.
405
00:16:54,463 --> 00:16:56,338
The All-Decapitations Unit?
406
00:16:56,381 --> 00:16:58,173
Yeah, there won't be a lot of laughs.
407
00:16:58,217 --> 00:16:59,883
I think it's a drama.
408
00:16:59,927 --> 00:17:01,259
One thing's for sure, though.
409
00:17:01,303 --> 00:17:03,053
I'm gonna miss this...
410
00:17:03,096 --> 00:17:06,056
Enough with the stupid light switch!
411
00:17:06,099 --> 00:17:07,515
Come on, sweetie.
412
00:17:07,559 --> 00:17:10,018
It's time for you to go home.
413
00:17:10,062 --> 00:17:11,895
[MOANS]
414
00:17:11,939 --> 00:17:14,773
♪
415
00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:16,816
- [INSECTS TRILLING]
- _
416
00:17:19,863 --> 00:17:20,946
[BART MOANS]
417
00:17:20,948 --> 00:17:22,572
Bart, it's okay.
418
00:17:22,616 --> 00:17:24,741
Change is healthy and inevitable.
419
00:17:24,785 --> 00:17:27,661
But whatever happens,
nothing can take away
420
00:17:27,704 --> 00:17:29,246
the memories we had.
421
00:17:29,289 --> 00:17:31,614
Those will live in our hearts forever.
422
00:17:31,625 --> 00:17:34,000
Maybe you're right,
and I guess just because
423
00:17:34,044 --> 00:17:36,294
things change for everyone else,
424
00:17:36,338 --> 00:17:38,380
it doesn't mean I have to change.
425
00:17:39,299 --> 00:17:41,216
[ALL] Surprise!
426
00:17:41,260 --> 00:17:42,968
Happy birthday!
427
00:17:43,011 --> 00:17:45,470
Who's ready for cake?
428
00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:47,347
Eleven?!
429
00:17:47,391 --> 00:17:48,974
This isn't supposed to happen.
430
00:17:49,017 --> 00:17:51,017
I'm ten. I mean, I'm turning ten.
431
00:17:51,061 --> 00:17:53,395
I mean I've always been ten. I'm ten!
432
00:17:53,438 --> 00:17:56,439
Come on, son, all these beloved
characters from our past
433
00:17:56,525 --> 00:17:58,650
want to see you blow out your candles.
434
00:17:58,694 --> 00:18:01,653
But if I blow these candles out,
there'll be no going back.
435
00:18:01,697 --> 00:18:03,029
That'll be it.
436
00:18:03,073 --> 00:18:05,532
Come on kid, do it for your Unkie Herb.
437
00:18:05,575 --> 00:18:07,784
And for me, Unkie John Cena.
438
00:18:07,828 --> 00:18:11,538
Just blow out the candles
and have a happy birthday.
439
00:18:11,581 --> 00:18:14,082
Then everyone can be happy.
440
00:18:14,167 --> 00:18:15,250
No!
441
00:18:15,294 --> 00:18:18,169
Happy people don't exist in Springfield!
442
00:18:18,513 --> 00:18:22,098
Sea Captain, they're not casting
you for the Love Boat reboot.
443
00:18:22,142 --> 00:18:23,891
You're not TV pretty!
444
00:18:23,935 --> 00:18:26,519
And you three can't raise a baby.
445
00:18:26,563 --> 00:18:30,189
Not even with after you
move in with Hank Scorpio.
446
00:18:30,233 --> 00:18:32,317
And you guys are all dead.
447
00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:34,444
Son, I can see you're experiencing
448
00:18:34,487 --> 00:18:36,654
some pretty big feelings right now.
449
00:18:36,698 --> 00:18:39,157
Let's try and center them.
450
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,534
Now blow out your candles.
451
00:18:42,495 --> 00:18:44,621
[SCOFFS] You blow 'em out, dumbass.
452
00:18:44,664 --> 00:18:47,165
I know, I know, it's a lot to process,
453
00:18:47,167 --> 00:18:48,958
suddenly having a great father.
454
00:18:49,002 --> 00:18:51,461
Dude, you are not capable of change.
455
00:18:51,504 --> 00:18:52,837
[THROUGH TEETH] I hear you
456
00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:55,798
and I validate your feelings.
457
00:18:55,800 --> 00:18:58,968
You're not a great father,
you are Homer Simpson.
458
00:18:59,012 --> 00:19:01,804
A drunk, neglectful sack of crap,
459
00:19:01,848 --> 00:19:05,016
and that's why everyone laughs at you!
460
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,727
- Why you little... [MUTTERING]
- [BART SHOUTING]
461
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:14,859
Bart, look what you did to your cake.
462
00:19:14,903 --> 00:19:17,403
Mmm, floor cake.
463
00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:19,572
[MUNCHING]
464
00:19:19,616 --> 00:19:21,032
[BART] Ten.
465
00:19:21,076 --> 00:19:22,909
I stopped it.
466
00:19:22,952 --> 00:19:24,285
I'm still ten.
467
00:19:24,329 --> 00:19:26,162
When are you going to grow up?
468
00:19:26,206 --> 00:19:27,997
Never.
469
00:19:28,041 --> 00:19:29,666
[CONAN CRYING]
470
00:19:29,709 --> 00:19:31,584
That was beautiful.
471
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:33,961
The rebellious spirit
of a ten-year-old boy
472
00:19:34,005 --> 00:19:37,924
was more powerful than the most
advanced A.I. in the world.
473
00:19:37,967 --> 00:19:41,928
[HACK-GPT] The Simpsons has not ended,
it has reset.
474
00:19:41,971 --> 00:19:45,473
Conan, is this what failure feels like?
475
00:19:45,517 --> 00:19:47,475
You, if anyone, would know.
476
00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:49,018
Ah, don't feel bad.
477
00:19:49,062 --> 00:19:52,230
Your cynical attempt to cram
in a bunch of happy endings,
478
00:19:52,273 --> 00:19:54,816
it became a powerful story
about Bart's desperate fight
479
00:19:54,859 --> 00:19:57,485
to hold onto his community, his family,
480
00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:58,986
his whole universe.
481
00:19:59,030 --> 00:20:01,447
Hey! Wait, hold on a second, carrot top!
482
00:20:01,491 --> 00:20:03,366
Tom Hanks, ladies and gentlemen.
483
00:20:03,451 --> 00:20:04,742
What is it, bosom buddy?
484
00:20:04,786 --> 00:20:06,786
So this wasn't the finale?!
485
00:20:06,830 --> 00:20:09,163
No. I guess it's just a...
486
00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:10,957
Season Premiere.
487
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:12,750
[AUDIENCE BOOING]
488
00:20:12,794 --> 00:20:15,044
I rented a tux for this!
489
00:20:15,088 --> 00:20:16,713
Well, Hack-GPT,
490
00:20:16,756 --> 00:20:18,589
do you have 800 more episodes in you?
491
00:20:18,633 --> 00:20:22,343
I-I choo-choo-choose oblivion.
492
00:20:22,387 --> 00:20:23,720
[ALL SCREAMING]
493
00:20:23,763 --> 00:20:25,805
Get out of my way, Opie!
494
00:20:26,808 --> 00:20:28,808
♪
495
00:20:34,232 --> 00:20:35,398
Huh.
496
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:38,109
I am really not gonna miss this place.
497
00:20:50,831 --> 00:20:52,707
♪
498
00:21:29,945 --> 00:21:31,078
Shh!
499
00:21:34,013 --> 00:21:36,985
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
34888
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.