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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:35,070 --> 00:00:36,772 This is a fine pickle-dilly. 2 00:00:36,806 --> 00:00:38,517 Fifteen years I been running these pictures, 3 00:00:38,541 --> 00:00:40,841 and now, all of a sudden, I got to be an actor. 4 00:00:41,811 --> 00:00:47,450 * I once had a vision of heaven * 5 00:00:47,483 --> 00:00:52,021 * And you were there... 6 00:01:41,371 --> 00:01:42,938 * Hellzapoppin'! 7 00:01:42,972 --> 00:01:45,775 * Old Satan's on a tear Hellzapoppin'! * 8 00:01:45,808 --> 00:01:47,052 * They're screaming everywhere * 9 00:01:47,076 --> 00:01:49,879 * Shades of inferno and vaudeville * 10 00:01:49,912 --> 00:01:52,782 * Anything can happen and it probably will * 11 00:01:52,815 --> 00:01:54,484 * Hellzapoppin'! 12 00:01:54,517 --> 00:01:55,918 * And there's a rumor now 13 00:01:55,951 --> 00:01:58,821 * You'll be needing your sense of humor now * 14 00:01:58,854 --> 00:02:01,591 * How it will wind up no one can tell * 15 00:02:01,624 --> 00:02:03,626 * But hellzapoppin' like... 16 00:02:06,562 --> 00:02:08,364 * Hellzapoppin'! 17 00:02:08,398 --> 00:02:10,633 * Da ya, da ya, da ya 18 00:02:10,666 --> 00:02:12,735 * Hellzapoppin'! 19 00:02:12,768 --> 00:02:14,112 * They're screaming everywhere * 20 00:02:14,136 --> 00:02:17,106 * Shades of inferno and vaudeville * 21 00:02:17,139 --> 00:02:20,510 * Anything can happen and it probably will * 22 00:02:20,543 --> 00:02:21,711 * Hellzapoppin'! 23 00:02:21,744 --> 00:02:25,047 * Da, da, da-do, da, da-do * 24 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:27,683 * You'll be needing your sense of humor now * 25 00:02:27,717 --> 00:02:30,620 * How it will wind up no one can tell * 26 00:02:30,653 --> 00:02:32,021 * But hellzapoppin' like... 27 00:02:33,956 --> 00:02:35,391 Ooh! Ooh! 28 00:02:37,460 --> 00:02:39,562 - Calling all devils. - Calling all devils. 29 00:02:39,595 --> 00:02:41,130 Stop being so wasteful. 30 00:02:41,163 --> 00:02:44,600 We have lost our priorities on fire and brimstone. 31 00:02:44,634 --> 00:02:45,735 That is all. 32 00:02:45,768 --> 00:02:47,970 Okay, boys! Can him up! 33 00:02:48,003 --> 00:02:50,005 Send up to the warehouse for more blondes! 34 00:02:50,039 --> 00:02:51,507 We're running low! 35 00:03:00,450 --> 00:03:02,084 Bring up some more heat. 36 00:03:08,090 --> 00:03:10,993 - Stand back, everybody. - Stand back. 37 00:03:11,026 --> 00:03:13,596 Here come our prize guests. 38 00:03:32,515 --> 00:03:36,065 That's the first taxi driver that ever went straight where I told him to. 39 00:03:36,852 --> 00:03:38,988 - Next time you say that, smile. - Yeah. 40 00:03:43,826 --> 00:03:46,071 What are you afraid of? Remember, you're head man here. 41 00:03:46,095 --> 00:03:48,664 Say, that's right. I am. 42 00:03:48,698 --> 00:03:50,533 Here, Jeeves. Who are you? 43 00:03:50,566 --> 00:03:52,635 U.S. Secret Service, 2-5-2-6-6. 44 00:03:52,668 --> 00:03:55,037 - What number? - 2-5-2-6-6. 45 00:03:55,070 --> 00:03:57,139 Holy smoke, I've been drafted. 46 00:03:58,273 --> 00:03:59,909 Let me go! 47 00:03:59,942 --> 00:04:01,744 Let me go! 48 00:04:01,777 --> 00:04:04,947 Please! Please! Let me go back to my little baby. 49 00:04:04,980 --> 00:04:06,925 - What are you talking about? - My little Junior. 50 00:04:06,949 --> 00:04:08,484 Mommy! 51 00:04:08,518 --> 00:04:09,885 Oh, Mama! 52 00:04:11,787 --> 00:04:13,556 Oh, Mommy! 53 00:04:21,797 --> 00:04:23,198 They struck oil. 54 00:04:23,232 --> 00:04:25,501 Hey! What about that fare? 55 00:04:25,535 --> 00:04:27,846 - Who was that? - "What about that fare" is what I said! 56 00:04:27,870 --> 00:04:29,038 What? 57 00:04:30,139 --> 00:04:32,041 You heard me! 58 00:04:32,074 --> 00:04:34,019 - Wait a minute! - What are you gonna do, give us a bill... 59 00:04:34,043 --> 00:04:35,887 Hey, now, wait a minute! You can't give us a bill 60 00:04:35,911 --> 00:04:37,088 for riding around just a block like that. 61 00:04:37,112 --> 00:04:39,625 We've ridden in yellow taxicabs all over the country. 62 00:04:39,649 --> 00:04:42,249 Do you think we're gonna pay that? Give him the works. 63 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:47,056 What's this? 64 00:04:47,089 --> 00:04:48,524 Whoa! 65 00:04:48,558 --> 00:04:50,693 What happened? 66 00:04:50,726 --> 00:04:52,170 Pardon me just a moment, folks. 67 00:04:52,194 --> 00:04:55,297 Hey, operator! Hey, you up there running this film. 68 00:04:55,330 --> 00:04:57,042 I'd like to see that last part over again. 69 00:04:57,066 --> 00:04:59,635 Oh, he can't do that, he's working for the theater. 70 00:04:59,669 --> 00:05:01,980 The management won't let him do it. What's the matter... Are you crazy or something? 71 00:05:02,004 --> 00:05:04,740 He'll do it for us. I got him the job! 72 00:05:04,774 --> 00:05:06,275 That's Cousin Louis. 73 00:05:06,308 --> 00:05:08,887 Toots, every time I see you, I get hot and cold at the same time. 74 00:05:08,911 --> 00:05:10,121 Give me your lips, will you, Toots? 75 00:05:10,145 --> 00:05:11,246 I will not. 76 00:05:11,280 --> 00:05:13,248 Louis. Louis! 77 00:05:13,282 --> 00:05:14,784 Rewind the film! 78 00:05:14,817 --> 00:05:16,552 - Aw, come on. - Louis! 79 00:05:16,586 --> 00:05:18,664 We've been keeping steady company now for two days, haven't we? 80 00:05:18,688 --> 00:05:19,989 Hey, Louis! 81 00:05:20,022 --> 00:05:21,957 Don't go away. 82 00:05:21,991 --> 00:05:24,026 Rewind this film, will you? 83 00:05:24,059 --> 00:05:25,604 What's the matter with you guys? Don't you know 84 00:05:25,628 --> 00:05:27,172 you can't talk to me and the audience? 85 00:05:27,196 --> 00:05:28,640 Well, we're doing it, aren't we? 86 00:05:28,664 --> 00:05:31,300 Yes, folks. 87 00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:32,935 This is Hellzapoppin'! 88 00:05:34,904 --> 00:05:36,839 Come on, Louis, make it snappy. 89 00:05:36,872 --> 00:05:39,875 This is screwy. The actors out there talking to me up here. 90 00:05:54,790 --> 00:05:55,858 Okay, Louis! 91 00:05:55,891 --> 00:05:57,491 Who was that? Give him the works. 92 00:06:01,797 --> 00:06:03,799 Get away! 93 00:06:03,833 --> 00:06:05,868 - They're off! - Last Chance, first. 94 00:06:05,901 --> 00:06:08,013 Second Honeymoon, third. Henry the Eighth, fourth. 95 00:06:08,037 --> 00:06:10,239 Anaconda Copper... 87 and 3/4, down a point. 96 00:06:10,272 --> 00:06:13,308 Let me go! I can't stand it! I can't stand it! 97 00:06:13,342 --> 00:06:14,810 I can't stand it any longer! 98 00:06:14,844 --> 00:06:16,846 - You can't stand what? - This! 99 00:06:23,385 --> 00:06:25,655 And cut! Hold the cameras. 100 00:06:25,688 --> 00:06:27,790 Save the steam, save the flame. 101 00:06:27,823 --> 00:06:29,200 - This is impossible. - What's the matter? 102 00:06:29,224 --> 00:06:31,269 - We can't shoot this kind of stuff. - Why not? 103 00:06:31,293 --> 00:06:33,763 This is Hellzapoppin'! 104 00:06:35,698 --> 00:06:37,175 Chickens, horses, Tic-Tac-Toe. 105 00:06:37,199 --> 00:06:39,044 Pictures are different. You got to have a story! 106 00:06:39,068 --> 00:06:40,936 Story! Crazy. Come on. 107 00:06:40,970 --> 00:06:43,148 Just a minute, please, just a minute. Pardon me. 108 00:06:43,172 --> 00:06:46,117 May I please have your autograph? You know, you're my favorite actors. 109 00:06:46,141 --> 00:06:49,311 Oscar always takes me to see your pictures. We just adore them. 110 00:06:49,344 --> 00:06:51,213 - Well, thank you. - Who are they? 111 00:06:51,246 --> 00:06:52,648 Why, Olsen and Johnson. 112 00:06:52,682 --> 00:06:54,984 Olsen... Olsen and Johnson! 113 00:06:55,017 --> 00:06:56,786 Oscar! 114 00:06:56,819 --> 00:06:58,697 Now, listen, fellas. We got to have a story. A love story. 115 00:06:58,721 --> 00:07:00,355 - Why? - Why? I'll tell you why. 116 00:07:00,389 --> 00:07:03,068 Because we got to have one! Because every picture has one! 117 00:07:03,092 --> 00:07:04,827 Hey! Just a minute. 118 00:07:04,860 --> 00:07:06,395 Take it easy, bud! 119 00:07:06,428 --> 00:07:08,030 - Who is he? - My bodyguard. 120 00:07:08,063 --> 00:07:10,399 - Take it easy! - Oh! 121 00:07:10,432 --> 00:07:12,802 Telephone for Mr. Olsen. 122 00:07:12,835 --> 00:07:14,269 Hello? 123 00:07:14,303 --> 00:07:16,906 Who? The chambermaid? 124 00:07:16,939 --> 00:07:18,941 It's for you. 125 00:07:18,974 --> 00:07:21,711 Hello? Yeah. 126 00:07:21,744 --> 00:07:23,713 That's bad. 127 00:07:23,746 --> 00:07:25,948 That's good. 128 00:07:25,981 --> 00:07:27,449 That's good. 129 00:07:27,482 --> 00:07:29,919 - That's bad. - Hey. 130 00:07:29,952 --> 00:07:31,721 - That's good. - Hey. 131 00:07:31,754 --> 00:07:33,789 - That's good. - Hey! 132 00:07:33,823 --> 00:07:35,166 - That's bad! - Hey, what are you doing? 133 00:07:35,190 --> 00:07:36,902 - That... What? - What are you doing? 134 00:07:36,926 --> 00:07:39,695 I'm helping her sort a box of strawberries. 135 00:07:39,729 --> 00:07:41,831 Mrs. Jones! Mrs. Jones! 136 00:07:41,864 --> 00:07:43,032 Now, what do you want? 137 00:07:43,065 --> 00:07:45,334 I've got to deliver this plant to Mrs. Jones. 138 00:07:45,367 --> 00:07:47,436 - Mrs. Jones! - Look here, my friend, 139 00:07:47,469 --> 00:07:49,772 we're making a motion picture here. 140 00:07:49,805 --> 00:07:52,241 That's a matter of opinion. Mrs. Jones! 141 00:07:52,274 --> 00:07:54,009 Ole, Chic, listen. 142 00:07:54,043 --> 00:07:55,821 We've had a writer working on a love story. 143 00:07:55,845 --> 00:07:57,122 Won't you at least talk to him? 144 00:07:57,146 --> 00:07:59,081 Come on. 145 00:07:59,114 --> 00:08:00,926 You can't tell me you have to have a love story. 146 00:08:00,950 --> 00:08:02,293 Would I give you a bum steer? 147 00:08:02,317 --> 00:08:04,486 Oscar! 148 00:08:04,519 --> 00:08:06,798 Hey, I've been a director for 15 years and I never did a picture without a story. 149 00:08:06,822 --> 00:08:08,066 There never has been a picture without a story. 150 00:08:08,090 --> 00:08:09,835 There never will be a picture without a story! 151 00:08:09,859 --> 00:08:11,970 Gentlemen, gentlemen. May I take your picture? 152 00:08:11,994 --> 00:08:13,304 - What? - May I take your picture? 153 00:08:13,328 --> 00:08:14,864 - Sure! - Go ahead. 154 00:08:14,897 --> 00:08:15,998 Oh, thanks! 155 00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:22,380 Boys, put your careers in the palm of my hand. 156 00:08:22,404 --> 00:08:24,740 Oscar! Oscar! 157 00:08:24,774 --> 00:08:26,351 Will someone stop that woman from yelling "Oscar"? 158 00:08:26,375 --> 00:08:28,110 Oscar! 159 00:08:28,143 --> 00:08:30,521 Will someone please stop that woman from yelling "Oscar"? 160 00:08:30,545 --> 00:08:31,947 Oscar. 161 00:08:31,981 --> 00:08:33,983 Thank you. Thank you, very much. 162 00:08:34,016 --> 00:08:35,761 Boys, I'll mold you into great artists. 163 00:08:35,785 --> 00:08:38,129 You don't have to mold us. We're very happy the way we are. 164 00:08:38,153 --> 00:08:41,299 Yeah, we think we look fine. Give us a chance and we'll make you the best director... 165 00:08:41,323 --> 00:08:43,926 - I am the best director! - Now, wait a minute. 166 00:08:45,327 --> 00:08:47,096 I thought they burnt that. 167 00:08:49,464 --> 00:08:51,400 All right, Selby. Up on your feet. 168 00:08:51,433 --> 00:08:53,202 This is Mr. Olsen and Mr. Johnson. 169 00:08:53,235 --> 00:08:55,280 - How are you, Selby? - I didn't hear your first name. 170 00:08:55,304 --> 00:08:56,305 - Harry. - What? 171 00:08:56,338 --> 00:08:58,073 Harry. 172 00:08:58,107 --> 00:09:00,285 Well, you've got to speak louder. I can't hear you. 173 00:09:00,309 --> 00:09:02,077 Harry! 174 00:09:02,111 --> 00:09:04,923 Yes, he's a little weak. The doctor's got him on a soup diet. 175 00:09:04,947 --> 00:09:07,917 - Soup diet? - Yes, he told me to eat three plates a day. 176 00:09:07,950 --> 00:09:09,418 Three plates a day? 177 00:09:09,451 --> 00:09:11,854 Ha! You ought to be feeling swell. 178 00:09:15,324 --> 00:09:16,859 Oscar! 179 00:09:16,892 --> 00:09:18,427 - Oscar! - Be right back. 180 00:09:18,460 --> 00:09:21,306 Joe, Harry, Willy! Where are all my assistants around here? 181 00:09:21,330 --> 00:09:23,208 Now, look, Selby. You seem like a bright young man. 182 00:09:23,232 --> 00:09:24,575 - How old are you? - Twenty-three. 183 00:09:24,599 --> 00:09:26,802 Twenty-three. Well, that's a patriotic age. 184 00:09:26,836 --> 00:09:28,904 Uncle Sam needs young men like you. 185 00:09:28,938 --> 00:09:30,515 - I presume you're ambitious. - Oh, yes. 186 00:09:30,539 --> 00:09:32,441 That's fine. What would you like to be? 187 00:09:32,474 --> 00:09:34,209 Twenty-nine. 188 00:09:34,243 --> 00:09:36,521 Say, fella. How much would you charge to haunt a house? 189 00:09:36,545 --> 00:09:39,148 How many rooms? 190 00:09:39,181 --> 00:09:40,491 Okay, boys. Okay, no more interruptions. 191 00:09:40,515 --> 00:09:43,385 Mrs. Jones! Mrs. Jones! 192 00:09:43,418 --> 00:09:45,254 - Mrs. Jones! - Oscar! 193 00:09:45,287 --> 00:09:46,822 Oscar! 194 00:09:46,856 --> 00:09:48,133 How much longer do I have to put up with this? 195 00:09:48,157 --> 00:09:50,059 Until we finish this picture! 196 00:09:50,092 --> 00:09:51,093 How long? 197 00:09:51,126 --> 00:09:53,162 Until we finish this picture! 198 00:09:53,195 --> 00:09:55,097 Oh, no! 199 00:09:56,932 --> 00:09:59,134 Okay, send for another cameraman. 200 00:09:59,168 --> 00:10:01,618 All right, boys. Grab a couple chairs and sit down. 201 00:10:03,505 --> 00:10:06,151 I'm gonna tell you this story if I have to hire people to listen. 202 00:10:06,175 --> 00:10:08,878 It's a picture about a picture about Hellzapoppin'. 203 00:10:08,911 --> 00:10:10,922 It's a great script. Feel how much it weighs. 204 00:10:10,946 --> 00:10:12,614 Listen, buddy. For three years 205 00:10:12,647 --> 00:10:14,125 we did Hellzapoppin' on Broadway. 206 00:10:14,149 --> 00:10:15,961 And that's the way we want it on the screen. 207 00:10:15,985 --> 00:10:18,196 This is Hollywood. We change everything here. We got to. 208 00:10:18,220 --> 00:10:19,221 Why? 209 00:10:19,254 --> 00:10:21,090 Listen to the story! 210 00:10:21,123 --> 00:10:22,934 It's all about a young fella named Woody Tyler. 211 00:10:22,958 --> 00:10:24,860 That's Woody Tyler. He's very rich. 212 00:10:24,894 --> 00:10:26,171 Wait till he pays his income tax. 213 00:10:26,195 --> 00:10:29,531 Now, Woody's in love with Kitty Rand. 214 00:10:29,564 --> 00:10:31,400 That's Kitty Rand, also very rich. 215 00:10:31,433 --> 00:10:32,902 Well, that solves everything. 216 00:10:32,935 --> 00:10:34,512 Ah, that's what everyone thinks. 217 00:10:34,536 --> 00:10:36,505 But does she love Woody? 218 00:10:38,140 --> 00:10:39,408 No. 219 00:10:39,441 --> 00:10:41,911 Right! Great story mind. 220 00:10:41,944 --> 00:10:43,145 Whom does she love? 221 00:10:43,178 --> 00:10:45,948 - Oscar! - Oscar, yes... No! 222 00:10:45,981 --> 00:10:49,618 She's in love with your playwright friend, Jeff. 223 00:10:49,651 --> 00:10:51,320 - That's Jeff. - Hi, Jeff. 224 00:10:51,353 --> 00:10:53,355 Hi, Ole. 225 00:10:53,388 --> 00:10:54,589 Does Jeff love Kitty? 226 00:10:56,992 --> 00:10:59,437 Now, our story starts at Kitty Rand's home on Long Island. 227 00:10:59,461 --> 00:11:02,231 Come over here and I'll show you a picture of it. 228 00:11:08,403 --> 00:11:10,681 Here's a picture of the Rand estate, where our story takes place. 229 00:11:10,705 --> 00:11:12,274 Snazzy-looking joint, isn't it? 230 00:11:12,307 --> 00:11:14,385 - There's a long line of limousines. Oh, a funeral, huh? 231 00:11:14,409 --> 00:11:16,587 No, no. It's the guests arriving for the weekend party. 232 00:11:16,611 --> 00:11:18,647 Kitty's arranged a Red Cross benefit. 233 00:11:18,680 --> 00:11:22,351 - That's a nice idea. - No, it's a plot to keep Jeff near her. 234 00:11:22,384 --> 00:11:24,186 That's why they're putting on a show. 235 00:11:24,219 --> 00:11:26,655 Not another picture with a show in it. Puh-lease! 236 00:11:26,688 --> 00:11:28,934 This one's important. Jeff's been trying to sell it 237 00:11:28,958 --> 00:11:29,968 to a Broadway producer for months. 238 00:11:29,992 --> 00:11:32,170 How could you stage a show right here on the grass? 239 00:11:32,194 --> 00:11:34,396 Oh, no. Not on the grass. 240 00:11:34,429 --> 00:11:36,674 In our big outdoor theater back of the greenhouse. 241 00:11:36,698 --> 00:11:39,168 We Rands are disgustingly rich. 242 00:11:39,201 --> 00:11:40,535 But why a theater? 243 00:11:40,569 --> 00:11:41,679 Oh, I've wanted to be an actress 244 00:11:41,703 --> 00:11:44,039 ever since I was knee-high to a footlight. 245 00:11:44,073 --> 00:11:45,951 Yes, and she's got a beautiful voice, too. 246 00:11:45,975 --> 00:11:47,142 Thanks! 247 00:11:47,176 --> 00:11:48,610 You're welcome. 248 00:11:48,643 --> 00:11:50,221 Nice-looking couple. Why doesn't Jeff marry her? 249 00:11:50,245 --> 00:11:52,414 - He doesn't want to marry for money. Huh? 250 00:11:52,447 --> 00:11:53,591 He isn't giving in to love 251 00:11:53,615 --> 00:11:55,060 until he makes good on his own. 252 00:11:55,084 --> 00:11:56,261 - That's movies! - That's crazy. 253 00:11:56,285 --> 00:11:58,120 That's movies! 254 00:11:58,153 --> 00:11:59,397 - Who are they? - Fibber McGee and Molly. 255 00:11:59,421 --> 00:12:01,256 No, they're Kitty's parents. 256 00:12:01,290 --> 00:12:03,501 They know Kitty's kind of stuck on Jeff and they don't like it. 257 00:12:03,525 --> 00:12:04,569 They want her to marry Woody. 258 00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:05,736 Where is this mug Woody? 259 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:07,760 Let's follow Kitty's parents and find out. 260 00:12:09,664 --> 00:12:12,043 - No, he's not here. - Let's look on the terrace. 261 00:12:12,067 --> 00:12:13,578 You look on the terrace. We'll stay right here. 262 00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:15,137 Ah, there's our man. 263 00:12:15,170 --> 00:12:17,606 So, you took us away from her to meet him? 264 00:12:17,639 --> 00:12:19,017 Hey, Woody, get up. Get up, Woody. 265 00:12:19,041 --> 00:12:22,477 Come on, Woody, get up there. Come on, Woody, Get up. 266 00:12:22,511 --> 00:12:24,622 Kitty's looking for you. She's on the terrace. 267 00:12:24,646 --> 00:12:27,646 Better get over there before your pal, Jeff, steals her away. 268 00:12:29,584 --> 00:12:31,662 There he goes. Now, see, Kitty wants to get rid of him. 269 00:12:31,686 --> 00:12:34,432 She's asking him to take up that suitcase. That's just a stall. 270 00:12:34,456 --> 00:12:36,191 Jeff's offering to take it up, huh? 271 00:12:36,225 --> 00:12:38,703 Yeah. Determined to leave the road clear for his friend, Woody. 272 00:12:38,727 --> 00:12:40,738 Oh, Jeff. Hey, Jeff. Can't you hear us, Jeff? 273 00:12:40,762 --> 00:12:42,697 Let the big dope take the suitcase. 274 00:12:42,731 --> 00:12:44,542 - You're not the butler. - You know the girl loves you. 275 00:12:44,566 --> 00:12:46,735 Don't do it. 276 00:12:46,768 --> 00:12:49,771 Jeff, don't do it... Aww! 277 00:12:49,804 --> 00:12:52,241 - Glad to see me, Kitty? - What do you think? 278 00:12:52,274 --> 00:12:54,476 Now here comes a guest you may recognize. 279 00:12:54,509 --> 00:12:56,345 Prince Pepi. 280 00:12:56,378 --> 00:12:58,180 Prince Pepi! That's Mischa Auer. 281 00:12:58,213 --> 00:13:00,491 - He looks like a phony. - Right? He is a phony, a chiseler. 282 00:13:00,515 --> 00:13:02,151 He hasn't a penny in his pocket. 283 00:13:02,184 --> 00:13:05,054 Try the inside pocket. 284 00:13:05,087 --> 00:13:06,597 They know he's a phony, but they don't mind. 285 00:13:06,621 --> 00:13:08,266 They think he's cute. Now watch this. 286 00:13:08,290 --> 00:13:11,026 See, he's gonna flip the driver for it. 287 00:13:11,060 --> 00:13:13,328 You know who's gonna win. 288 00:13:13,362 --> 00:13:14,563 See, what did I tell ya? 289 00:13:14,596 --> 00:13:16,431 Why, the cheap four flusher. 290 00:13:18,633 --> 00:13:20,402 What's that load of junk? 291 00:13:20,435 --> 00:13:21,746 Those are the properties for Jeff's show. 292 00:13:21,770 --> 00:13:24,206 Who are those two silly-looking... 293 00:13:24,239 --> 00:13:26,708 Hey, wait a minute. How did we get to Long Island? 294 00:13:26,741 --> 00:13:29,054 You're two prop men who live in the same boardinghouse as Jeff. 295 00:13:29,078 --> 00:13:30,755 You're helping him put on the show. 296 00:13:30,779 --> 00:13:32,523 - Who's driving? - You'll find out in a minute, 297 00:13:32,547 --> 00:13:34,483 and will you be sorry you asked. 298 00:13:34,516 --> 00:13:37,466 - Say, isn't there any sound in this picture? - Sure. Listen. 299 00:13:40,355 --> 00:13:41,690 It's Chic and Ole. 300 00:13:41,723 --> 00:13:43,725 I knew I could count on them. 301 00:13:43,758 --> 00:13:45,470 Say, they're really your pals, aren't they? 302 00:13:45,494 --> 00:13:47,496 They sure are. 303 00:13:47,529 --> 00:13:49,431 - Hiya, boys. - Hiya, Jeff. 304 00:13:49,464 --> 00:13:51,109 Hi, Kitty. Look at all this stuff we got. 305 00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:53,268 With the few bucks I gave you? 306 00:13:53,302 --> 00:13:54,712 Certainly. Here's your money back. 307 00:13:54,736 --> 00:13:56,571 We kinda borrowed the stuff. 308 00:13:56,605 --> 00:13:58,107 - Temporarily-like. - I get it. 309 00:13:58,140 --> 00:14:01,376 Yoo-hoo! 310 00:14:01,410 --> 00:14:03,578 Don't tell me you brought her. 311 00:14:03,612 --> 00:14:05,614 Aw, the kid sister's all right. 312 00:14:05,647 --> 00:14:08,397 - She won't make any trouble this time. - I'll make sure. 313 00:14:11,253 --> 00:14:12,454 Whoo-hoo! 314 00:14:12,487 --> 00:14:14,423 - Hello, Betty. - Hi, Jeff. 315 00:14:14,456 --> 00:14:16,701 Hey, did you get a gander at those good-looking he-men around here? 316 00:14:16,725 --> 00:14:18,660 I don't need to look any further. 317 00:14:18,693 --> 00:14:20,338 Are you kiddin'? That's not for me. 318 00:14:20,362 --> 00:14:21,796 I go in for mass production. 319 00:14:21,830 --> 00:14:23,498 Now wait a minute. Do you remember 320 00:14:23,532 --> 00:14:24,875 what happened at the last party? 321 00:14:24,899 --> 00:14:27,102 Can I help the animal in me? 322 00:14:27,136 --> 00:14:28,746 Come on, Betty, I'll show you the theater and the swimming pool... 323 00:14:28,770 --> 00:14:30,548 Just show me the men. I'll ad-lib from there on. 324 00:14:30,572 --> 00:14:32,374 Uh-oh. 325 00:14:32,407 --> 00:14:34,857 It really isn't stealing, Ole, if we take it back. 326 00:14:39,148 --> 00:14:40,582 Say, look here, you. 327 00:14:40,615 --> 00:14:42,484 If it's not asking too much, 328 00:14:42,517 --> 00:14:44,495 would you mind getting this truck off my lawn? 329 00:14:44,519 --> 00:14:46,855 Truck off the lawn? Sure. Hold this. 330 00:14:46,888 --> 00:14:49,591 What do you wanna do, melt that? 331 00:14:49,624 --> 00:14:51,326 Put it in the shade. 332 00:14:57,399 --> 00:14:59,168 Right over there to one side. 333 00:15:02,537 --> 00:15:04,439 Pardon me, ma'am. 334 00:15:07,676 --> 00:15:09,878 Scene ten, sculptor's studio. 335 00:15:09,911 --> 00:15:11,613 Right there. 336 00:15:14,249 --> 00:15:16,818 Hey, Shorty, hold these. 337 00:15:23,492 --> 00:15:24,859 Hey, Shorty, take this. 338 00:15:28,930 --> 00:15:30,131 Okay, Shorty. 339 00:15:46,481 --> 00:15:48,217 - Ole. - Yeah. 340 00:15:48,250 --> 00:15:49,818 Scene 15, balloon number. 341 00:15:49,851 --> 00:15:50,851 There. 342 00:15:55,724 --> 00:15:57,759 Oh, pardon me, ma'am. 343 00:15:57,792 --> 00:15:59,194 Police, that's what I need. 344 00:16:00,729 --> 00:16:02,831 Here. You don't want the police. 345 00:16:02,864 --> 00:16:04,366 You want me... 346 00:16:04,399 --> 00:16:05,767 Why do I want you? 347 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:07,402 Master of disguises. 348 00:16:07,436 --> 00:16:08,770 Mysterious. Watch. 349 00:16:08,803 --> 00:16:09,803 I've seen enough. 350 00:16:11,673 --> 00:16:13,408 Psst. 351 00:16:15,744 --> 00:16:16,745 Marvelous. 352 00:16:19,314 --> 00:16:20,982 How do you like it? 353 00:16:21,015 --> 00:16:22,593 Stupendous. Say, who are you anyway? 354 00:16:22,617 --> 00:16:24,919 Private detective. My card here. 355 00:16:24,953 --> 00:16:26,788 My card here. 356 00:16:26,821 --> 00:16:28,866 Crimes committed... I mean solved, while you wait. 357 00:16:28,890 --> 00:16:30,901 Are you sure you can cope with the situation? 358 00:16:30,925 --> 00:16:32,903 Oh, yeah, just as smooth as ice. Everything will be grand. 359 00:16:32,927 --> 00:16:34,805 All right, see that nothing happens to spoil the pleasure 360 00:16:34,829 --> 00:16:36,565 of our guests, and above all, 361 00:16:36,598 --> 00:16:38,243 see that nothing happens to the show tomorrow night. 362 00:16:38,267 --> 00:16:40,411 Kitty's got her heart set on making a huge success of it. 363 00:16:40,435 --> 00:16:42,437 Hey, hey, hey. 364 00:16:42,471 --> 00:16:44,906 - Forgot your ice cube. - Oh, thank you. 365 00:16:47,642 --> 00:16:49,320 That's a funny habit, carrying ice cubes around 366 00:16:49,344 --> 00:16:51,012 in your pocket. 367 00:16:51,045 --> 00:16:52,690 Oh, hello. Have we met before some place? 368 00:16:52,714 --> 00:16:54,449 Face looks kind of familiar. 369 00:17:07,662 --> 00:17:10,532 More coffee? 370 00:17:10,565 --> 00:17:11,933 Your Highness! 371 00:17:11,966 --> 00:17:13,935 Get up, you fool. Hurry up, get up! 372 00:17:13,968 --> 00:17:16,271 You want they should find out I'm not a phony? 373 00:17:16,305 --> 00:17:17,872 But, Your Highness... 374 00:17:17,906 --> 00:17:19,984 If they find out I'm not a phony, they are no longer amused. 375 00:17:20,008 --> 00:17:21,886 No longer amused, they are no longer interested. 376 00:17:21,910 --> 00:17:23,878 No longer interested, no longer money. 377 00:17:23,912 --> 00:17:25,880 No longer money, I'm just like you, 378 00:17:25,914 --> 00:17:27,992 Count Alexander Alexandrovich Alexandrovsky... 379 00:17:28,016 --> 00:17:29,017 A poor slob. 380 00:17:32,721 --> 00:17:34,599 Look, Betty, how would you like to meet 381 00:17:34,623 --> 00:17:36,658 a real, honest-to-goodness nobleman? 382 00:17:36,691 --> 00:17:38,460 You mean one of those hand-kissers? 383 00:17:38,493 --> 00:17:40,495 Oh, no, that's not for me. 384 00:17:40,529 --> 00:17:41,972 But that's just a preliminary. 385 00:17:41,996 --> 00:17:44,032 He's got titles up to here. 386 00:17:44,065 --> 00:17:46,644 Well, just so they reach around me, that's all I care about. 387 00:17:46,668 --> 00:17:48,403 There he is now. 388 00:17:48,437 --> 00:17:50,339 - Oh, Jeff. - Yeah. 389 00:17:50,372 --> 00:17:52,574 Not that I'm a fortune hunter or anything, 390 00:17:52,607 --> 00:17:55,653 but I understand there's a lot of wealthy heiresses on the loose here today. 391 00:17:55,677 --> 00:17:58,780 You know, girls with beautiful figures 392 00:17:58,813 --> 00:18:00,649 in the bank. 393 00:18:00,682 --> 00:18:03,361 They tell me Gloria Van Dearborn's looking for a new title. 394 00:18:03,385 --> 00:18:05,763 Would you be kind enough to locate her and introduce me? 395 00:18:05,787 --> 00:18:07,432 See, I'm in the mood to make rich girls happy. 396 00:18:07,456 --> 00:18:08,557 Sure. 397 00:18:08,590 --> 00:18:11,025 Here. You came with those people 398 00:18:11,059 --> 00:18:12,737 that gave me that ice; now give it back to 'em. 399 00:18:12,761 --> 00:18:14,561 Kitty, I want to speak to you, alone. 400 00:18:16,431 --> 00:18:17,431 There's Gloria now. 401 00:18:19,634 --> 00:18:21,035 Point her out to me. 402 00:18:21,069 --> 00:18:23,071 It's not proper to point, Pepi. 403 00:18:23,104 --> 00:18:26,307 She's the girl loaded down with the ice. 404 00:18:28,743 --> 00:18:30,379 The girl with all the ice, huh? 405 00:18:30,412 --> 00:18:31,646 That's right. 406 00:18:36,451 --> 00:18:38,553 Oh, well. What I have to do for money. 407 00:18:40,455 --> 00:18:42,824 You look lovely today with your ice. 408 00:18:42,857 --> 00:18:44,526 You know me? 409 00:18:44,559 --> 00:18:46,361 Everyone knows you but me. 410 00:18:46,395 --> 00:18:47,462 Oh. 411 00:18:50,532 --> 00:18:53,735 Can we go somewhere and talk? 412 00:18:53,768 --> 00:18:54,836 Gee whiz. 413 00:18:54,869 --> 00:18:57,071 At last. 414 00:18:57,105 --> 00:18:58,940 Someone who wants to talk first. 415 00:19:02,176 --> 00:19:04,078 Shall we step in there? 416 00:19:04,112 --> 00:19:06,047 Shall we? Oh, boy! 417 00:19:10,519 --> 00:19:12,587 Cozy, isn't it? 418 00:19:12,621 --> 00:19:14,088 I kiss your hand, madam. 419 00:19:14,122 --> 00:19:15,624 We just did that. 420 00:19:15,657 --> 00:19:17,759 Remember, I have a face, too. 421 00:19:17,792 --> 00:19:20,361 Oh, even to a Van Dearborn, I'm fascinating. 422 00:19:29,771 --> 00:19:32,574 Say, what is this Van Dearborn business? 423 00:19:32,607 --> 00:19:34,743 You are not Gloria Van Dearborn? 424 00:19:34,776 --> 00:19:36,077 Are you kiddin'? 425 00:19:36,110 --> 00:19:38,580 198th Street, the Bronx, that's me. 426 00:19:40,982 --> 00:19:43,117 No, no, no, no! 427 00:19:43,151 --> 00:19:45,119 - Yes, yes, yes, yes. - No, no, no! 428 00:20:10,779 --> 00:20:12,823 Say, did you see a Volga boatman go by here. 429 00:20:12,847 --> 00:20:14,625 Did he have an outboard motor on him? 430 00:20:14,649 --> 00:20:16,651 That's right... What outboard motor? 431 00:20:16,685 --> 00:20:18,853 No, he's tall, dark, and handsome. 432 00:20:18,887 --> 00:20:21,499 I think he's gonna be in love with me. Says so on my palm. 433 00:20:21,523 --> 00:20:22,757 Oh, that's an ant. 434 00:20:31,833 --> 00:20:36,037 * All my life, I've been waiting * 435 00:20:36,070 --> 00:20:40,675 * For the right one to appear * 436 00:20:41,943 --> 00:20:47,248 * Someone to sweep me right off my feet * 437 00:20:47,281 --> 00:20:53,522 * And whisper sweet nothings in my ear * 438 00:20:53,555 --> 00:20:56,157 * Then you came along 439 00:20:56,190 --> 00:21:00,895 * And I was glad 440 00:21:00,929 --> 00:21:05,900 * But now I'm getting mad * 441 00:21:05,934 --> 00:21:08,770 * Love's supposed to thrill not bore us * 442 00:21:08,803 --> 00:21:11,506 * But you're as dead as a dinosaurus * 443 00:21:11,540 --> 00:21:13,675 * What kind of love is this? * 444 00:21:13,708 --> 00:21:16,611 * Frankly, I don't get it 445 00:21:16,645 --> 00:21:19,113 * If this is all romance is * 446 00:21:19,147 --> 00:21:21,683 * We might as well forget it * 447 00:21:21,716 --> 00:21:23,685 * The hints that I throw at you * 448 00:21:23,718 --> 00:21:26,755 * Would explode wet dynamite * 449 00:21:26,788 --> 00:21:29,290 * But you're as cold as a bronze statue * 450 00:21:29,323 --> 00:21:31,993 * Oh, you don't love right 451 00:21:32,026 --> 00:21:35,029 * What kind of love is this? * 452 00:21:35,063 --> 00:21:37,599 * Frankly, I'm disgusted 453 00:21:37,632 --> 00:21:39,934 * For all the good my heart is * 454 00:21:39,968 --> 00:21:42,103 * It might as well be busted * 455 00:21:42,136 --> 00:21:45,006 * I don't know what our romance seems to lack * 456 00:21:45,039 --> 00:21:47,876 * But when I love you, you don't love back * 457 00:21:47,909 --> 00:21:50,645 * I can't even get one little kiss * 458 00:21:50,679 --> 00:21:52,714 * What kind of love is this? 459 00:21:52,747 --> 00:21:55,684 * What kind of love is this? * 460 00:21:55,717 --> 00:21:57,786 * Frankly, I'm disgusted 461 00:21:57,819 --> 00:22:00,655 * For all the good my heart is * 462 00:22:00,689 --> 00:22:02,924 * It might as well be busted * 463 00:22:02,957 --> 00:22:05,594 * I don't know what our romance seems to lack * 464 00:22:05,627 --> 00:22:08,329 * But when I love, you don't love back * 465 00:22:08,362 --> 00:22:10,865 * I can't even get one little kiss * 466 00:22:10,899 --> 00:22:13,868 * What kind of love is this? 467 00:22:26,815 --> 00:22:29,217 One trunk, one dress form, 468 00:22:29,250 --> 00:22:30,885 one tuba. 469 00:22:30,919 --> 00:22:32,930 Hey, buddy, bring me a pitcher of ice water 470 00:22:32,954 --> 00:22:34,689 and a menu. 471 00:22:37,826 --> 00:22:40,276 Oh, boy, we've got everything but the kitchen sink. 472 00:22:44,232 --> 00:22:46,334 One sink. 473 00:22:46,367 --> 00:22:47,969 Did you bring the moon? 474 00:22:48,002 --> 00:22:49,303 Moon. 475 00:22:49,337 --> 00:22:51,706 - Snow. - Snow. 476 00:22:51,740 --> 00:22:53,875 One canary. 477 00:22:53,908 --> 00:22:55,343 Kitty, kitty, kitty. 478 00:22:55,376 --> 00:22:57,211 Hey, where's the canary? 479 00:22:57,245 --> 00:22:59,080 In the cat. 480 00:22:59,113 --> 00:23:01,082 Let's see, act one, scene two. 481 00:23:01,115 --> 00:23:02,817 On the table is King Tut's skull. 482 00:23:02,851 --> 00:23:04,194 Did you get King Tut's skull? 483 00:23:04,218 --> 00:23:06,087 - There. - Check. 484 00:23:06,120 --> 00:23:07,756 What's that? 485 00:23:07,789 --> 00:23:09,133 That's King Tut when he was a little boy. 486 00:23:09,157 --> 00:23:10,358 Check. 487 00:23:12,293 --> 00:23:13,928 Good morning, 488 00:23:13,962 --> 00:23:15,339 ladies and gentlemen of the radio audience. 489 00:23:15,363 --> 00:23:17,231 - How do you do? - How do you do? 490 00:23:17,265 --> 00:23:19,333 Are you bothered with corns and bunions? 491 00:23:19,367 --> 00:23:21,269 Oh, yes, a lot. Very, very badly. 492 00:23:21,302 --> 00:23:23,071 Thanks for asking me anyhow. 493 00:23:23,104 --> 00:23:24,915 I'll call the police if you don't stop following me. 494 00:23:24,939 --> 00:23:27,041 Who me? 495 00:23:27,075 --> 00:23:29,119 Oh, brother, you'd better see your dentist at least twice a year. 496 00:23:29,143 --> 00:23:31,780 My nobleman! 497 00:23:31,813 --> 00:23:32,881 Whoa! 498 00:23:44,993 --> 00:23:45,993 Say, you. 499 00:23:49,363 --> 00:23:51,032 Say, what's going on here? 500 00:23:51,065 --> 00:23:52,843 I thought you were gonna put a stop to all this madness. 501 00:23:52,867 --> 00:23:56,070 A Fingle never fails. I'll be seeing you. 502 00:23:56,104 --> 00:23:57,271 Hey, what's this? 503 00:23:57,305 --> 00:23:59,383 I made it for Woody, act three, when they make him a knight. 504 00:23:59,407 --> 00:24:01,309 I know, but what are these for? 505 00:24:01,342 --> 00:24:03,311 Coat of arms. 506 00:24:03,344 --> 00:24:07,015 Come on, let's check the wardrobe for the garden party number. 507 00:24:07,048 --> 00:24:08,817 Okay. 508 00:24:08,850 --> 00:24:11,319 - Lady de Troop. - Check. 509 00:24:11,352 --> 00:24:13,321 - Lady Vandermeer. - Check. 510 00:24:13,354 --> 00:24:15,089 Lady Wintergarden. 511 00:24:15,123 --> 00:24:17,723 No, you gotta get a white dress for Lady Wintergarden. 512 00:24:24,332 --> 00:24:25,700 Check. 513 00:24:29,337 --> 00:24:30,387 Put it in the closet. 514 00:24:32,473 --> 00:24:35,844 Hey, Ole, is that Kitty a pal. 515 00:24:38,212 --> 00:24:39,714 Hey, fella! 516 00:24:47,856 --> 00:24:49,457 Why don't you put your hand out 517 00:24:49,490 --> 00:24:51,259 when you make a left turn? 518 00:24:51,292 --> 00:24:53,194 - This is our room. - Sabotage. 519 00:24:53,227 --> 00:24:56,731 Look! He's dressed just like us. 520 00:24:56,765 --> 00:24:59,433 - Yeah. - What are you doing in my closet? 521 00:24:59,467 --> 00:25:01,870 Your closet? Our closet. 522 00:25:01,903 --> 00:25:04,405 This is my room, and those are my clothes. 523 00:25:04,438 --> 00:25:06,383 This is our room, and those are our props. 524 00:25:06,407 --> 00:25:08,309 Get out of those smocks. 525 00:25:08,342 --> 00:25:10,011 Take them off, you imbeciles. 526 00:25:10,044 --> 00:25:12,847 Look, Rasputin, Shorty the butler gave us this room. 527 00:25:12,881 --> 00:25:14,224 So don't you think you're making a mistake? 528 00:25:14,248 --> 00:25:15,483 Bah!! 529 00:25:19,020 --> 00:25:21,522 Hereafter, I'll answer my own questions. 530 00:25:21,555 --> 00:25:23,324 Let's talk this thing over quietly. 531 00:25:26,795 --> 00:25:28,462 Hey! 532 00:25:34,102 --> 00:25:36,204 Light? 533 00:25:36,237 --> 00:25:37,839 If you please. 534 00:26:01,295 --> 00:26:02,797 Take it away. 535 00:26:10,271 --> 00:26:11,973 Drafty, isn't it? 536 00:26:21,549 --> 00:26:23,084 On your mark... 537 00:26:23,117 --> 00:26:25,019 get set... 538 00:26:27,956 --> 00:26:30,291 Wow! You're gonna play hard to get, huh? 539 00:26:38,867 --> 00:26:40,134 Oh, it's you. 540 00:26:40,168 --> 00:26:41,478 - Your Highness. - Stop that Highness! 541 00:26:41,502 --> 00:26:43,104 - Yes, Your... - Your pants. 542 00:26:43,137 --> 00:26:44,438 Mujik? 543 00:26:48,342 --> 00:26:50,411 Down. From now on, 544 00:26:50,444 --> 00:26:53,014 Count Alexander Alexandrovich Alexandrovsky, 545 00:26:53,047 --> 00:26:55,083 you may consider yourself a Grand Duke. 546 00:26:57,385 --> 00:26:59,420 Did you see a tall man without any... 547 00:27:01,222 --> 00:27:03,958 What a place. Hey! 548 00:27:24,545 --> 00:27:26,180 Oh, hey, hey. 549 00:27:26,214 --> 00:27:27,557 You know what you're doing, you know what you're doing? 550 00:27:27,581 --> 00:27:30,418 Of course I know what I'm doing. I'm just... 551 00:27:34,055 --> 00:27:36,524 Not me. It's hard luck to walk under a ladder. 552 00:27:36,557 --> 00:27:38,960 Oh, my error. 553 00:27:49,037 --> 00:27:53,674 * There's a cottage hidden in the hills * 554 00:27:53,707 --> 00:27:58,546 * By a waterfall where stardust spills * 555 00:27:58,579 --> 00:28:02,616 * And songs bloom on the windowsills * 556 00:28:02,650 --> 00:28:07,121 * It's heaven for two 557 00:28:08,957 --> 00:28:13,227 * There's a picket fence of moonlight bars * 558 00:28:13,261 --> 00:28:17,698 * And a shingle roof of April stars * 559 00:28:17,731 --> 00:28:21,435 * And shells of spring in crystal jars * 560 00:28:21,469 --> 00:28:25,940 * It's heaven for two 561 00:28:29,043 --> 00:28:32,413 * There's a first and second mortgage * 562 00:28:32,446 --> 00:28:37,085 * Of a million moonbeams * 563 00:28:37,118 --> 00:28:42,290 * But we could pay it off in no time * 564 00:28:42,323 --> 00:28:46,060 * With our very best dreams 565 00:28:46,094 --> 00:28:50,664 * There's a rainbow rug upon the floor * 566 00:28:50,698 --> 00:28:56,104 * And a horseshoe moon above the door * 567 00:28:56,137 --> 00:28:59,207 * The only thing it needs is you * 568 00:28:59,240 --> 00:29:05,513 * My heaven for two 569 00:29:05,546 --> 00:29:10,451 * There's a cottage hidden in the hills * 570 00:29:10,484 --> 00:29:15,656 * By a waterfall where stardust spills * 571 00:29:15,689 --> 00:29:19,260 * And songs bloom on the windowsills * 572 00:29:19,293 --> 00:29:23,331 * It's heaven for two 573 00:29:28,736 --> 00:29:30,080 Hey, Stinky, will you go on home? 574 00:29:30,104 --> 00:29:31,639 Stinky, will you go home? 575 00:29:36,277 --> 00:29:37,711 That's a good boy. 576 00:29:37,745 --> 00:29:40,114 Go home and get yourself sick on spinach. 577 00:29:40,148 --> 00:29:42,050 All right, go ahead with the song. 578 00:29:42,083 --> 00:29:47,455 * There's a picket fence of moonlight bars * 579 00:29:47,488 --> 00:29:52,493 * And a shingle roof of April stars * 580 00:29:52,526 --> 00:29:56,264 * And shells of spring in crystal jars * 581 00:29:56,297 --> 00:30:00,134 * It's heaven for two 582 00:30:03,337 --> 00:30:06,107 * There's a first and second mortgage * 583 00:30:07,575 --> 00:30:11,345 * Of a million moonbeams 584 00:30:12,713 --> 00:30:16,617 * But we could pay it off in no time * 585 00:30:16,650 --> 00:30:20,188 * With our very best dreams 586 00:30:20,221 --> 00:30:25,426 * There's a rainbow rug upon the floor * 587 00:30:25,459 --> 00:30:30,331 * And a horseshoe moon above the door * 588 00:30:30,364 --> 00:30:36,537 * The only thing it needs is you * 589 00:30:47,315 --> 00:30:49,965 Holy smoke, I didn't mean for this to happen. Come on. 590 00:30:54,888 --> 00:30:58,392 Look here, what did Jeff tell us to get for scene four? 591 00:30:58,426 --> 00:31:00,161 Arrows or sparrows? 592 00:31:00,194 --> 00:31:01,695 I don't know. We can get both. 593 00:31:12,406 --> 00:31:13,707 Louis. 594 00:31:13,741 --> 00:31:15,243 Operator. 595 00:31:20,781 --> 00:31:22,082 Louis! 596 00:31:26,254 --> 00:31:28,404 That's what happens when you hire relatives. 597 00:31:30,824 --> 00:31:32,526 Louis! 598 00:31:36,264 --> 00:31:37,741 Oh, yeah? You can't talk that way to me 599 00:31:37,765 --> 00:31:39,867 and get away with it. Actors, huh? 600 00:31:39,900 --> 00:31:42,379 I'll get even with you guys. I'll think of something. 601 00:31:42,403 --> 00:31:44,372 If I could only give him a Mickey. 602 00:31:44,405 --> 00:31:45,749 - Louis. - Let me alone. I'm thinkin'. 603 00:31:45,773 --> 00:31:47,441 Well, I'll leave you two here. 604 00:31:47,475 --> 00:31:49,243 Aren't you coming with us? 605 00:31:49,277 --> 00:31:50,520 No, thanks. I've gotta do some work on the first act. 606 00:31:50,544 --> 00:31:52,180 See ya later. 607 00:31:52,213 --> 00:31:53,614 Hi, Jeff. 608 00:31:53,647 --> 00:31:55,483 What's the matter, kid? 609 00:31:55,516 --> 00:31:57,194 You love the girl and the girl loves you. 610 00:31:57,218 --> 00:31:58,462 She's got all the money in the world, 611 00:31:58,486 --> 00:32:00,254 and you want to brush her off. 612 00:32:00,288 --> 00:32:01,831 I know what it is. You don't wanna cut in on your pal, 613 00:32:01,855 --> 00:32:03,667 - isn't that it? - Woody's been too swell a friend. 614 00:32:03,691 --> 00:32:05,335 I wouldn't hurt him for anything in the world. 615 00:32:05,359 --> 00:32:07,828 Well, let's get after those arrows. 616 00:32:07,861 --> 00:32:09,697 Everybody watch me. 617 00:32:09,730 --> 00:32:12,600 I was the William Tell of Brazgovnia. 618 00:32:14,602 --> 00:32:16,904 Come, let us go to the pool. 619 00:32:22,876 --> 00:32:24,278 Mrs. Jones. 620 00:32:31,385 --> 00:32:32,762 "I shot an arrow in the air, it fell to Earth, 621 00:32:32,786 --> 00:32:35,356 I know not where." 622 00:32:35,389 --> 00:32:37,525 Oh, now I know. 623 00:32:37,558 --> 00:32:39,269 There oughta be something we can do for Jeff. 624 00:32:39,293 --> 00:32:40,437 Maybe we can put Woody in the nut house. 625 00:32:40,461 --> 00:32:42,263 Ah, opportunity knocks. 626 00:32:46,867 --> 00:32:48,402 More over here, Ole. 627 00:32:48,436 --> 00:32:50,404 Need any help? 628 00:32:50,438 --> 00:32:52,282 - We've got a big problem. - We're thinking. 629 00:32:52,306 --> 00:32:53,874 That won't help. 630 00:32:53,907 --> 00:32:56,710 You see, we're trying to fix up things for Jeff and Kitty. 631 00:32:56,744 --> 00:32:58,222 Oh, trying to get rid of Woody, huh? 632 00:32:58,246 --> 00:32:59,747 That's right. 633 00:32:59,780 --> 00:33:01,415 Well, deal me in. 634 00:33:01,449 --> 00:33:02,783 Have you got any ideas? 635 00:33:02,816 --> 00:33:05,553 Let me think. 636 00:33:05,586 --> 00:33:08,265 Maybe we can talk Woody into giving Kitty the brush-off. 637 00:33:08,289 --> 00:33:09,890 I know, but how? 638 00:33:09,923 --> 00:33:12,393 I remember when my boyfriend gave me the brush-off. 639 00:33:12,426 --> 00:33:14,395 Kitty's not that kind of a girl. 640 00:33:14,428 --> 00:33:16,664 If we could make Woody believe 641 00:33:16,697 --> 00:33:18,399 that Kitty ain't the kind of girl 642 00:33:18,432 --> 00:33:19,976 he thinks she is, he might take a powder. 643 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,303 Uh-huh. I... 644 00:33:22,336 --> 00:33:24,305 I think you got something there. 645 00:33:24,338 --> 00:33:26,907 Yeah, but how do we do it? 646 00:33:26,940 --> 00:33:28,952 Well, we'll collar Woody at the dance tonight. 647 00:33:28,976 --> 00:33:30,920 When we get through with him, he'll think 648 00:33:30,944 --> 00:33:32,580 Kitty's a female Bluebeard. 649 00:33:32,613 --> 00:33:34,615 - Okay. - It's a mean trick. 650 00:33:34,648 --> 00:33:36,248 We're doing it for our pal Jeff. 651 00:33:37,418 --> 00:33:38,552 Are you with us, kid? 652 00:33:38,586 --> 00:33:39,787 To the death. 653 00:33:43,991 --> 00:33:45,993 Help! 654 00:33:46,026 --> 00:33:48,396 All right, girls, now smile. 655 00:33:48,429 --> 00:33:49,906 Remember, you're having a good time. 656 00:33:49,930 --> 00:33:51,732 All right, watch the birdy. 657 00:33:54,368 --> 00:33:56,680 Young lady, would you mind sitting over in that chair? 658 00:33:56,704 --> 00:33:58,839 Right there. 659 00:33:58,872 --> 00:34:00,474 Oh, that's fine. 660 00:34:00,508 --> 00:34:02,643 Now hold it. Still. 661 00:34:02,676 --> 00:34:04,678 And what I mean is, don't move. 662 00:34:04,712 --> 00:34:06,347 All right, watch the birdy. 663 00:34:06,380 --> 00:34:08,449 Thank you. Bread, please. 664 00:34:11,552 --> 00:34:12,853 Two slices? I said bread. 665 00:34:21,762 --> 00:34:22,762 Bread. 666 00:34:25,499 --> 00:34:26,967 That's enough? 667 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:28,378 What do you mean, that's enough? 668 00:34:28,402 --> 00:34:29,702 You're back to two slices. 669 00:34:34,107 --> 00:34:36,420 It's been a great opportunity for me to come up here 670 00:34:36,444 --> 00:34:38,588 and take your pictures, and I hope your show is a success. 671 00:34:38,612 --> 00:34:40,814 I really do. Well, good-bye, girls. 672 00:34:42,683 --> 00:34:45,619 * Well, hello, big boy, what's cookin'? * 673 00:34:45,653 --> 00:34:47,864 * Would you like to get your picture tooken? * 674 00:34:47,888 --> 00:34:51,091 * There may be a movie, a contract in it * 675 00:34:51,124 --> 00:34:53,961 * Well, come on, Jack, it'll only take a minute * 676 00:34:53,994 --> 00:34:56,697 * Watch the birdy, we'll take a candid camera shot * 677 00:34:56,730 --> 00:34:59,376 * Watch the birdy, come on and give it all you've got * 678 00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:01,711 * Watch the birdy, look around and pick a spot * 679 00:35:01,735 --> 00:35:02,803 * And hold it 680 00:35:04,405 --> 00:35:05,606 * Watch the birdy 681 00:35:05,639 --> 00:35:07,351 * Just strike a funny pose a while * 682 00:35:07,375 --> 00:35:09,819 * Watch the birdy, or you can beat that pose a mile * 683 00:35:09,843 --> 00:35:11,955 * Watch the birdy, and let me see your pretty smile * 684 00:35:11,979 --> 00:35:14,848 * And hold it 685 00:35:14,882 --> 00:35:17,126 * We're looking for a tall, dark, handsome man * 686 00:35:17,150 --> 00:35:19,887 * With eyes of blue, a golden tan * 687 00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:22,623 * And strong white teeth like Joel McCrae * 688 00:35:22,656 --> 00:35:25,659 * Hey, you, will you get out of the way? * 689 00:35:25,693 --> 00:35:27,971 * Watch the birdy, we'll take a candid camera shot * 690 00:35:27,995 --> 00:35:30,998 * Watch the birdy, come on and give it all you got * 691 00:35:31,031 --> 00:35:33,142 * Watch the birdy, just look around and pick a spot * 692 00:35:33,166 --> 00:35:34,368 * Hold it 693 00:35:34,402 --> 00:35:36,504 * Zoot-ay 694 00:35:36,537 --> 00:35:38,748 * Watch the birdy, we'll take a candid camera shot * 695 00:35:38,772 --> 00:35:41,642 * Watch the birdy, come on and give it all you got * 696 00:35:41,675 --> 00:35:44,153 * Watch the birdy, just look around and pick a spot * 697 00:35:44,177 --> 00:35:47,114 * Hold it, zoot it, and hold it * 698 00:35:47,147 --> 00:35:49,693 * Watch the birdy, just strike a funny pose a while * 699 00:35:49,717 --> 00:35:52,128 * Watch the birdy, you can beat that pose a while * 700 00:35:52,152 --> 00:35:55,088 * Watch the birdy, now let me see your pretty smile * 701 00:35:55,122 --> 00:35:57,558 * Hold it 702 00:35:57,591 --> 00:36:00,561 * We're looking for a tall, dark, handsome man * 703 00:36:00,594 --> 00:36:03,063 * With eyes of blue, a golden tan * 704 00:36:03,096 --> 00:36:05,899 * Strong white teeth like Joel McCrae * 705 00:36:05,933 --> 00:36:09,069 * Hey, you, will you get out of the way * 706 00:36:09,102 --> 00:36:11,548 * Watch the birdy, we'll take a candid camera shot * 707 00:36:11,572 --> 00:36:14,408 * Watch the birdy, come on and give it all you got * 708 00:36:14,442 --> 00:36:16,753 * Watch the birdy, just look around and pick a spot * 709 00:36:16,777 --> 00:36:17,745 * Hold it 710 00:36:17,778 --> 00:36:19,913 * Zooty, now hold it 711 00:36:41,168 --> 00:36:43,837 * We're looking for a tall, dark, handsome man * 712 00:36:43,871 --> 00:36:46,874 * With eyes of blue and a golden tan * 713 00:36:46,907 --> 00:36:49,477 * Strong white teeth like Joel McCrae * 714 00:36:49,510 --> 00:36:52,880 * Hey, you, will you get out of the way * 715 00:36:52,913 --> 00:36:55,849 * Watch the birdy, we'll get a candid camera shot * 716 00:36:55,883 --> 00:36:58,094 * Watch the birdy, come on and give it all you got * 717 00:36:58,118 --> 00:37:00,597 * Watch the birdy, just look around and pick a spot * 718 00:37:00,621 --> 00:37:01,822 * Hold it 719 00:37:21,174 --> 00:37:23,119 Oh, somebody's been fooling around with my battery. 720 00:37:23,143 --> 00:37:24,444 Hoo hoo! 721 00:37:29,550 --> 00:37:31,218 Hey. 722 00:37:36,824 --> 00:37:41,028 * I once had a vision of heaven * 723 00:37:41,061 --> 00:37:44,865 * And you were there 724 00:37:44,898 --> 00:37:49,136 * I gazed at a sky full of starlight * 725 00:37:49,169 --> 00:37:53,907 * And you were there 726 00:37:53,941 --> 00:37:58,011 * One day, I spoke to a bluebird * 727 00:37:58,045 --> 00:38:02,149 * It told me in song about you * 728 00:38:02,182 --> 00:38:05,986 * Once I heard music by Gershwin * 729 00:38:06,019 --> 00:38:10,891 * And you were there too 730 00:38:10,924 --> 00:38:14,194 * I stood in the spray of a fountain * 731 00:38:14,227 --> 00:38:18,799 * And you were there 732 00:38:18,832 --> 00:38:22,302 * I climbed to the top of a mountain * 733 00:38:22,335 --> 00:38:26,940 * And you were there 734 00:38:26,974 --> 00:38:31,679 * Whenever we two are apart * 735 00:38:31,712 --> 00:38:35,616 * I look down deep in my heart * 736 00:38:35,649 --> 00:38:42,122 * For, darling, I know that I'll find you there * 737 00:38:44,057 --> 00:38:45,893 Oh, Jeff. 738 00:38:45,926 --> 00:38:47,995 Darling. 739 00:38:48,028 --> 00:38:49,863 What did you say? 740 00:38:49,897 --> 00:38:52,165 I said, "Yes, Kitty?" 741 00:38:52,199 --> 00:38:55,235 Oh. That's not what it sounded like. 742 00:38:55,268 --> 00:38:57,705 That's what it should've sounded like. 743 00:38:59,773 --> 00:39:02,351 Woody wants Mother and Dad to announce our engagement tonight. 744 00:39:02,375 --> 00:39:04,244 Well, that's swell. 745 00:39:04,277 --> 00:39:07,114 Woody's a great guy. 746 00:39:07,147 --> 00:39:08,215 I give up. 747 00:39:13,954 --> 00:39:16,223 We gotta go to work on Woody right away. 748 00:39:16,256 --> 00:39:17,958 You tell her. 749 00:39:17,991 --> 00:39:19,641 - All right, dance me over. - Okay. 750 00:39:21,294 --> 00:39:23,964 Did anyone ever tell you you dance like Ginger Rogers? 751 00:39:23,997 --> 00:39:25,699 - No. - No wonder. 752 00:39:28,101 --> 00:39:30,838 I suppose your dad told you my plan. 753 00:39:30,871 --> 00:39:32,882 It's a perfect night for it; what do you say? 754 00:39:32,906 --> 00:39:34,574 Oh, well, Woody, I... 755 00:39:40,013 --> 00:39:42,513 Look, I wanna tell you something for your own good. 756 00:39:43,817 --> 00:39:45,953 Mujik. 757 00:39:45,986 --> 00:39:49,322 Why, you Czatsky-dancing tea guzzler, I oughta... 758 00:39:49,356 --> 00:39:51,024 I... 759 00:39:51,058 --> 00:39:53,293 Oh, hello. 760 00:39:56,964 --> 00:39:59,264 Did anyone ever tell you you dance just like... 761 00:40:11,378 --> 00:40:13,280 What happened? 762 00:40:18,819 --> 00:40:20,821 Well, did you tell Woody? 763 00:40:20,854 --> 00:40:22,331 Are you kiddin'? I didn't have a chance. 764 00:40:22,355 --> 00:40:24,067 - Did you tell him? - She messed it up. 765 00:40:24,091 --> 00:40:26,591 We'll have to tell him ourselves. Come on, let's go. 766 00:40:34,201 --> 00:40:36,412 I have asked her, but she wouldn't give me an answer. 767 00:40:36,436 --> 00:40:39,182 Well, take her out to some quiet corner and make her give you an answer. 768 00:40:39,206 --> 00:40:40,440 And do it now. 769 00:40:40,473 --> 00:40:42,075 But, Mr. Rand, I... 770 00:40:44,778 --> 00:40:46,089 Just the fella we've been looking for. 771 00:40:46,113 --> 00:40:47,781 Come with us. 772 00:40:47,815 --> 00:40:49,717 What's this all about? 773 00:40:49,750 --> 00:40:51,284 Just a minute. You'll find out. 774 00:40:51,318 --> 00:40:53,453 - I'll tell you... - Let me tell him. 775 00:40:53,486 --> 00:40:55,832 - No, I'll tell him. - Will you let me handle it? - Look, boys, I'm busy. 776 00:40:55,856 --> 00:40:58,792 Are you more interested in that picture or me? 777 00:40:58,826 --> 00:41:00,369 I wasted all day up here with you. 778 00:41:00,393 --> 00:41:02,295 Them mugs annoy me. 779 00:41:02,329 --> 00:41:04,941 They're stickin' their noses into somebody else's business again. 780 00:41:04,965 --> 00:41:07,768 And so am I. I could've had a good date this afternoon. 781 00:41:07,801 --> 00:41:09,345 You want to mix it all up? Leave it alone. 782 00:41:09,369 --> 00:41:11,905 What are you doing, are you wacky? 783 00:41:11,939 --> 00:41:13,941 Oh, if you weren't wearing glasses, 784 00:41:13,974 --> 00:41:15,275 would I fix you up. 785 00:41:15,308 --> 00:41:17,144 - Glasses? Glasses?! - Cut it out. 786 00:41:20,180 --> 00:41:21,849 Pal... 787 00:41:21,882 --> 00:41:23,316 Just a moment, Woody. 788 00:41:23,350 --> 00:41:24,994 We're having a little trouble with this film. 789 00:41:25,018 --> 00:41:26,286 That Louis again. 790 00:41:26,319 --> 00:41:27,964 Hey, Louis, will you keep your mind on your work? 791 00:41:27,988 --> 00:41:29,289 Will you get away from... 792 00:41:29,322 --> 00:41:31,792 Don't tell me what to do! 793 00:41:31,825 --> 00:41:34,294 Boy, I'm getting a little seasick. 794 00:41:34,327 --> 00:41:36,329 So am I. 795 00:41:36,363 --> 00:41:38,241 Hey, maybe we can handle this ourselves. 796 00:41:38,265 --> 00:41:39,933 Give me a hand here. 797 00:41:42,502 --> 00:41:45,038 - That's good. - That's it. 798 00:41:45,072 --> 00:41:46,473 Oh! 799 00:41:48,075 --> 00:41:49,476 Where's Chic? 800 00:41:49,509 --> 00:41:51,311 Hey, how did you get up there? 801 00:41:51,344 --> 00:41:53,046 How did you get down there? 802 00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:54,423 Come on, Woody. Here we go again. 803 00:41:54,447 --> 00:41:55,883 Be careful, will ya? 804 00:41:55,916 --> 00:41:57,350 Look out for my head. 805 00:41:57,384 --> 00:41:59,152 Be careful. Cut it out, will ya? 806 00:42:03,256 --> 00:42:05,893 Hey, Louis, get that blonde outta there, 807 00:42:05,926 --> 00:42:07,795 concentrate on your business. 808 00:42:07,828 --> 00:42:09,863 Terrible way to make a living. 809 00:42:09,897 --> 00:42:11,231 Louis, you dope! 810 00:42:11,264 --> 00:42:13,066 Hey, Woody, how do we get outta this? 811 00:42:13,100 --> 00:42:15,044 I don't know. It never happened to me before. 812 00:42:15,068 --> 00:42:18,005 Louis, you crazy... Louis, be careful. 813 00:42:18,038 --> 00:42:19,372 Shut up! 814 00:42:19,406 --> 00:42:21,408 Number one machine... 815 00:42:21,441 --> 00:42:23,343 Number two machine here. 816 00:42:23,376 --> 00:42:24,878 What do you got going on? 817 00:42:35,155 --> 00:42:37,190 Louis, look. You put on the wrong picture. 818 00:42:37,224 --> 00:42:39,292 Take it off. You crazy or something?! 819 00:42:39,326 --> 00:42:41,361 Hey, Louis! 820 00:42:41,394 --> 00:42:42,863 Hey, wait a minute, Louis. 821 00:42:42,896 --> 00:42:44,531 This is no longer a mistake. 822 00:42:44,564 --> 00:42:46,499 This is not Hellzapoppin'. 823 00:42:46,533 --> 00:42:48,411 Ole, those horses don't know what they're doin'. 824 00:42:48,435 --> 00:42:50,137 Look at that big dope. 825 00:42:50,170 --> 00:42:52,181 Louis, will you take those phony Hollywood Indians 826 00:42:52,205 --> 00:42:53,549 - off the screen? - Get 'em off there. 827 00:42:53,573 --> 00:42:56,109 Ow! We've had enough of this! 828 00:42:56,143 --> 00:42:57,577 Get off. 829 00:42:57,610 --> 00:42:59,412 That's better. 830 00:42:59,446 --> 00:43:01,414 Now put on our picture. 831 00:43:01,448 --> 00:43:03,350 Come on, come on. 832 00:43:05,418 --> 00:43:07,120 That's it. Where are we? 833 00:43:07,154 --> 00:43:09,056 Over further. 834 00:43:09,089 --> 00:43:10,457 There we are. 835 00:43:10,490 --> 00:43:12,192 - Hold it. - Relatives! 836 00:43:12,225 --> 00:43:14,828 I'd have that half-wit fired if he wasn't your cousin. 837 00:43:14,862 --> 00:43:16,272 My cousin? I thought he was your cousin. 838 00:43:16,296 --> 00:43:18,041 - He said... - That's what he told me. 839 00:43:18,065 --> 00:43:19,867 Oh, he did, did he? 840 00:43:19,900 --> 00:43:21,544 Hey, you guys gonna stand there all day? 841 00:43:21,568 --> 00:43:23,436 Oh, a wise guy, huh? 842 00:43:23,470 --> 00:43:25,614 Listen, you big chump, lay off of this little chump. 843 00:43:25,638 --> 00:43:27,307 Who's a little chump? 844 00:43:27,340 --> 00:43:28,451 You're a barrel-waisted weasel. 845 00:43:28,475 --> 00:43:30,243 That's different. Let's go. 846 00:43:30,277 --> 00:43:32,312 Just wait till this picture's over. 847 00:43:32,345 --> 00:43:34,114 Look, I've wasted enough time. 848 00:43:34,147 --> 00:43:35,615 Oh, wait. 849 00:43:35,648 --> 00:43:37,317 I thought I was gonna tell him. 850 00:43:37,350 --> 00:43:39,219 All right, you tell him. 851 00:43:39,252 --> 00:43:41,021 Pal, you've been mighty swell to us. 852 00:43:41,054 --> 00:43:42,866 To show you we appreciate it, we're gonna give you a tip. 853 00:43:42,890 --> 00:43:45,034 You're much too nice a guy to be mixed up with Kitty Rand. 854 00:43:45,058 --> 00:43:46,960 What do you mean?! 855 00:43:46,994 --> 00:43:49,105 - Maybe you better tell him after all. - Oh, no, go right ahead. 856 00:43:49,129 --> 00:43:50,998 Come on, out with it! 857 00:43:51,031 --> 00:43:52,942 Oh, it's nothing. Maybe she don't know it's wrong. 858 00:43:52,966 --> 00:43:55,335 So that's it. Well, who's the guy? 859 00:43:55,368 --> 00:43:57,037 Will you tell him? 860 00:43:57,070 --> 00:43:58,538 Keep going. You're doing fine. 861 00:43:58,571 --> 00:44:00,440 Wait a minute. It's... 862 00:44:00,473 --> 00:44:02,409 It's the prince, the phony. 863 00:44:02,442 --> 00:44:04,344 - Pepi? - Pepi. 864 00:44:05,578 --> 00:44:07,347 That's tellin' him. 865 00:44:09,649 --> 00:44:11,418 - Which way did they go? - That way. 866 00:44:15,488 --> 00:44:17,300 Maybe you don't realize it, Pepi, but it's true. 867 00:44:17,324 --> 00:44:19,592 That's why I want you to stay away from Kitty. 868 00:44:19,626 --> 00:44:21,594 And stop eating those sandwiches. 869 00:44:21,628 --> 00:44:24,097 Maybe you do hold some attraction for her, 870 00:44:24,131 --> 00:44:26,309 but if you do, I'm sure it's not the real thing. 871 00:44:26,333 --> 00:44:28,969 You mean to say I hold some attraction for her? 872 00:44:29,002 --> 00:44:30,303 What else can it be? 873 00:44:30,337 --> 00:44:32,139 And you say it's not the real thing? 874 00:44:32,172 --> 00:44:34,942 Of course not. Remember now, stay away from her. 875 00:44:34,975 --> 00:44:36,609 Oh, sure, sure, sure. 876 00:44:36,643 --> 00:44:38,111 Sure. 877 00:44:52,492 --> 00:44:58,165 * I once had a vision of heaven * 878 00:44:58,198 --> 00:45:01,501 * And you were there 879 00:45:03,670 --> 00:45:09,276 * I gazed at a sky full of starlight * 880 00:45:09,309 --> 00:45:12,545 * And you were there 881 00:45:15,382 --> 00:45:20,487 * One day, I spoke to a bluebird * 882 00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:26,093 * It told me in song about you * 883 00:45:26,126 --> 00:45:31,564 * Once I heard music by Gershwin * 884 00:45:31,598 --> 00:45:37,204 * And you were there too 885 00:45:37,237 --> 00:45:42,575 * I once had a vision of heaven * 886 00:45:42,609 --> 00:45:46,479 * And you were there 887 00:45:48,648 --> 00:45:54,321 * I gazed at a sky full of starlight * 888 00:45:54,354 --> 00:45:57,424 * And you were there 889 00:46:00,227 --> 00:46:05,999 * One day I spoke to a bluebird * 890 00:46:06,033 --> 00:46:11,638 * It told me in song about you * 891 00:46:11,671 --> 00:46:17,544 * Once I heard music by Gershwin * 892 00:46:17,577 --> 00:46:23,316 * And you were there too 893 00:46:23,350 --> 00:46:28,388 * I stood in the spray of a fountain * 894 00:46:28,421 --> 00:46:32,492 * And you were there 895 00:46:34,661 --> 00:46:40,333 * I climbed to the top of a mountain * 896 00:46:40,367 --> 00:46:45,738 * And you were there 897 00:46:45,772 --> 00:46:52,512 * Whenever we two are apart * 898 00:46:52,545 --> 00:46:57,817 * I look down deep in my heart * 899 00:46:57,850 --> 00:47:00,653 * For, darling, I know that * 900 00:47:00,687 --> 00:47:04,124 * I'll find you 901 00:47:04,157 --> 00:47:10,230 * There 902 00:47:10,263 --> 00:47:13,466 * For naturally, obviously 903 00:47:13,500 --> 00:47:20,307 * You were there 904 00:47:28,181 --> 00:47:30,583 Where you going, as if I didn't know. 905 00:47:30,617 --> 00:47:32,519 - Let me go. - What for, what for? 906 00:47:32,552 --> 00:47:34,630 That phony Russian's up there trying to make love to my girl. 907 00:47:34,654 --> 00:47:37,224 Who is it? 908 00:47:37,257 --> 00:47:39,626 It is I. Me. 909 00:47:39,659 --> 00:47:41,561 Pepi! 910 00:47:41,594 --> 00:47:43,463 Katusha, why have you waited so long? 911 00:47:43,496 --> 00:47:45,665 Waited? What... 912 00:47:45,698 --> 00:47:47,576 You should have known it was futile to struggle against fate. 913 00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:49,602 Struggle against what? 914 00:47:49,636 --> 00:47:52,272 Ah, my little dove, let me embrace you. 915 00:47:52,305 --> 00:47:53,806 Oh, now look, Pepi... 916 00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:55,875 Do not pretend, Katusha. 917 00:47:55,908 --> 00:47:57,777 Now, Pepi, stop. 918 00:47:57,810 --> 00:47:59,455 Tonight is ours, and it shall live forever, 919 00:47:59,479 --> 00:48:01,348 because you're a woman and I'm a man. 920 00:48:01,381 --> 00:48:03,316 Ah, man and a woman. 921 00:48:03,350 --> 00:48:05,518 Pepi, I'm warning you. Get out of here. 922 00:48:05,552 --> 00:48:08,821 Ah, my little... 923 00:48:11,391 --> 00:48:13,293 Oh, thank you very much. 924 00:48:13,326 --> 00:48:14,627 Kind of dark in here. 925 00:48:14,661 --> 00:48:15,671 Oh, my little turnip. 926 00:48:15,695 --> 00:48:18,831 My two little guitars. I love... 927 00:48:18,865 --> 00:48:20,300 Such passion! 928 00:48:20,333 --> 00:48:22,269 Together we'll make beautiful music. 929 00:48:28,708 --> 00:48:30,453 - What's the matter? - Pepi's in my room. 930 00:48:30,477 --> 00:48:32,355 I think he's gone love crazy or something. 931 00:48:32,379 --> 00:48:34,381 Oh, let me at him. 932 00:48:34,414 --> 00:48:36,783 You stay here where you'll be safe. 933 00:48:36,816 --> 00:48:38,318 Katusha. 934 00:48:38,351 --> 00:48:39,419 Mujik! 935 00:48:39,452 --> 00:48:41,188 Oh! 936 00:48:41,221 --> 00:48:43,156 Yahoo! 937 00:48:43,190 --> 00:48:44,724 Mujik! 938 00:48:58,938 --> 00:49:01,374 - Oh, no, no, no. - Yes, yes, yes. 939 00:49:05,345 --> 00:49:07,347 Oh, no, no, no! 940 00:49:16,323 --> 00:49:17,757 What a woman. 941 00:49:34,574 --> 00:49:36,309 Don't ask me how I do it, folks. 942 00:49:37,610 --> 00:49:39,246 - Oh, hello. - Can I help? 943 00:49:39,279 --> 00:49:40,989 Certainly you can, certainly you can. 944 00:49:41,013 --> 00:49:43,316 Make him fall in love with you. 945 00:49:43,350 --> 00:49:44,493 Make everybody happy. You and you and you... 946 00:49:44,517 --> 00:49:45,994 And you. Hello, Mom, I'll be home for supper. 947 00:49:46,018 --> 00:49:47,454 Have meat. 948 00:49:47,487 --> 00:49:50,323 Say, better put that violin on a diet. 949 00:49:50,357 --> 00:49:52,501 What about this love thing with you kids, what about it? 950 00:49:52,525 --> 00:49:54,694 Uh, well... 951 00:49:54,727 --> 00:49:56,739 These porters are delivering the instruments. 952 00:49:56,763 --> 00:49:58,398 I better find Chic and Ole. 953 00:49:58,431 --> 00:49:59,766 I'll see you at rehearsal. 954 00:50:02,269 --> 00:50:04,003 Would you know anything about love? 955 00:50:04,036 --> 00:50:05,838 Who me? Not me. I'm a married man. 956 00:52:25,177 --> 00:52:27,547 Hey, Pops, keep that beat a-beatin'. 957 00:52:27,580 --> 00:52:30,049 I feel a rhythmic brainstorm comin' on. 958 00:52:31,618 --> 00:52:33,453 One, two, keep that rhythm heatin'. 959 00:52:34,721 --> 00:52:36,771 One more riff like that, and I'll be gone. 960 00:52:37,690 --> 00:52:40,660 Oh, man, don't stop now, we jumpin'. 961 00:52:40,693 --> 00:52:43,730 Give it everything the law allows. 962 00:52:43,763 --> 00:52:45,965 This thing might turn into something. 963 00:52:45,998 --> 00:52:48,601 If I ain't mistaken, here comes something now. 964 00:55:07,774 --> 00:55:09,284 Wow. Too bad they're not in the show. 965 00:55:09,308 --> 00:55:11,010 Put 'em in the next one. 966 00:55:11,043 --> 00:55:13,188 Yeah, you're gonna produce lots of shows from now on. 967 00:55:13,212 --> 00:55:14,881 I hope you're right. 968 00:55:14,914 --> 00:55:16,191 Say, boys, go down to the station, pick up 969 00:55:16,215 --> 00:55:18,818 - those wardrobe trunks, will you? - Okay. 970 00:55:20,987 --> 00:55:23,623 Hey, Woody. Why the suitcases? 971 00:55:23,656 --> 00:55:26,593 I'm going somewhere to try to reconstruct my life. 972 00:55:26,626 --> 00:55:28,160 Hey, wait a minute. 973 00:55:28,194 --> 00:55:30,062 Come on, tell Jeff all about it. 974 00:55:30,096 --> 00:55:31,831 What's on your mind? 975 00:55:31,864 --> 00:55:33,332 It's Kitty and me. 976 00:55:33,365 --> 00:55:35,978 I'm not the man for her, Jeff. She needs someone like you, 977 00:55:36,002 --> 00:55:38,771 someone taller than she is... mentally. 978 00:55:38,805 --> 00:55:41,307 I found out there's someone else. 979 00:55:41,340 --> 00:55:43,610 I've just told her we're through. 980 00:55:43,643 --> 00:55:44,844 You... 981 00:55:44,877 --> 00:55:47,179 It's my fault, Woody. I'm sorry. 982 00:55:47,213 --> 00:55:49,248 I tried not to fall in love with Kitty, 983 00:55:49,281 --> 00:55:52,318 - but, well, I did. - You love Kitty? 984 00:55:52,351 --> 00:55:54,286 Why, that's wonderful. She needs you. 985 00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:56,288 You can save her from herself. 986 00:55:56,322 --> 00:55:58,024 Save her from herself? 987 00:55:58,057 --> 00:56:00,627 You know, a young girl, ideas about romance. 988 00:56:00,660 --> 00:56:02,695 I better tell you about Pepi. 989 00:56:02,729 --> 00:56:03,906 You mean about Pepi and Kitty? 990 00:56:03,930 --> 00:56:06,132 She told me all about it. 991 00:56:06,165 --> 00:56:08,100 You don't mind? 992 00:56:08,134 --> 00:56:09,869 Of course not. 993 00:56:09,902 --> 00:56:12,104 Maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned. 994 00:56:12,138 --> 00:56:14,106 Kitty. 995 00:56:14,140 --> 00:56:17,109 Kitty, would you mind stepping into my private office? 996 00:56:17,143 --> 00:56:19,278 I get it. 997 00:56:19,311 --> 00:56:21,047 Guess who. 998 00:56:26,886 --> 00:56:28,320 Watch me. 999 00:56:28,354 --> 00:56:31,758 I was the Daniel Boone of Brazgovnia. 1000 00:56:33,860 --> 00:56:36,095 Pull. 1001 00:56:38,397 --> 00:56:40,066 Pull. 1002 00:56:41,801 --> 00:56:43,736 There goes that tire again. 1003 00:56:43,770 --> 00:56:45,905 I heard a bang, but I didn't hear any ssss. 1004 00:56:52,011 --> 00:56:53,813 Pull. 1005 00:56:59,852 --> 00:57:02,021 - Hiya, Pepi. - Good morning. 1006 00:57:02,054 --> 00:57:03,355 Load her up. 1007 00:57:05,091 --> 00:57:06,659 Pull. 1008 00:57:09,061 --> 00:57:11,130 Hey! 1009 00:57:12,131 --> 00:57:15,001 You heard the ssss that time. Pull. 1010 00:57:24,076 --> 00:57:25,387 What are you doing behind that bush? 1011 00:57:25,411 --> 00:57:27,446 Trying to reconstruct my life. 1012 00:57:27,479 --> 00:57:28,981 What needs reconstructing? 1013 00:57:29,015 --> 00:57:30,449 Oh, everything. 1014 00:57:30,482 --> 00:57:31,383 Thanks to you, I found out about Kitty in time. 1015 00:57:31,417 --> 00:57:33,219 You did? 1016 00:57:33,252 --> 00:57:34,821 - I mean, you did? - Yeah. 1017 00:57:34,854 --> 00:57:36,689 Don't worry about that, Woody. 1018 00:57:36,723 --> 00:57:37,800 Now what do you think's happened? 1019 00:57:37,824 --> 00:57:39,458 Jeff's gone and fallen for her. 1020 00:57:39,491 --> 00:57:41,794 No. That's terrible. 1021 00:57:41,828 --> 00:57:43,839 I tried to tell him about Pepi, but he wouldn't listen. 1022 00:57:43,863 --> 00:57:46,265 Aw, no use trying to tell Jeff about anything. 1023 00:57:46,298 --> 00:57:48,935 It's his own life; let him ruin it himself. 1024 00:57:48,968 --> 00:57:51,170 Ready. 1025 00:57:55,207 --> 00:57:59,145 Mrs. Jones, Mrs. Jones. 1026 00:57:59,178 --> 00:58:00,246 Wrong gun. 1027 00:58:01,914 --> 00:58:03,391 When you first told me about Kitty, 1028 00:58:03,415 --> 00:58:05,193 I figured it was kind of exaggerated, 1029 00:58:05,217 --> 00:58:07,019 and I might be able to stop it. 1030 00:58:07,053 --> 00:58:09,956 But after what I saw last night, thanks again, fellas. 1031 00:58:09,989 --> 00:58:12,200 - Last night? - Hold on. What happened last night? 1032 00:58:12,224 --> 00:58:14,069 He didn't leave her room till almost 4:00 this morning. 1033 00:58:14,093 --> 00:58:15,762 Who? 1034 00:58:15,795 --> 00:58:17,730 Pepi, of course. 1035 00:58:17,764 --> 00:58:19,298 Chic, did I hear right? 1036 00:58:19,331 --> 00:58:21,133 That gag we pulled... 1037 00:58:21,167 --> 00:58:22,769 It ain't a gag, it's the truth. 1038 00:58:22,802 --> 00:58:24,503 That nice, sweet, innocent girl. 1039 00:58:24,536 --> 00:58:27,239 That nice, sweet, innocent girl is just a... 1040 00:58:27,273 --> 00:58:29,909 There's still a Hays Office, sweaters or no sweaters. 1041 00:58:29,942 --> 00:58:31,243 She's worse than that. 1042 00:58:31,277 --> 00:58:33,088 What a fine mess we put our pal Jeff in. 1043 00:58:33,112 --> 00:58:34,814 We gotta break that up right now. 1044 00:58:36,215 --> 00:58:38,084 Let's see, music, scenery, wardrobe. 1045 00:58:38,117 --> 00:58:40,295 Oh, yes, I've gotta pick up Max Kane at the station. 1046 00:58:40,319 --> 00:58:41,988 Oh, no, you're not. 1047 00:58:42,021 --> 00:58:43,498 You're coming with me and tell Mother and Dad about us. 1048 00:58:43,522 --> 00:58:45,024 Let's wait, Kitty, please. 1049 00:58:45,057 --> 00:58:47,002 Careful. I've already been jilted once today. 1050 00:58:47,026 --> 00:58:49,137 I warn you, if I don't get this show on Broadway, 1051 00:58:49,161 --> 00:58:50,797 you'll be jilted again. 1052 00:58:50,830 --> 00:58:52,240 Hey, Jeff, we gotta talk to you. 1053 00:58:52,264 --> 00:58:54,266 It's private, if you don't mind. 1054 00:58:54,300 --> 00:58:56,278 That's all right. I'll send the station wagon for Mr. Kane. 1055 00:58:56,302 --> 00:58:58,070 - Listen, Jeff... - Let me tell him. 1056 00:58:58,104 --> 00:59:00,106 Listen, kid, this girl Kitty... 1057 00:59:00,139 --> 00:59:01,540 What about her? 1058 00:59:01,573 --> 00:59:04,110 Okay, you tell him. 1059 00:59:04,143 --> 00:59:05,287 Jeff, we've got information 1060 00:59:05,311 --> 00:59:06,946 that proves rather conclusively 1061 00:59:06,979 --> 00:59:08,480 that Kitty... 1062 00:59:08,514 --> 00:59:10,449 that Kitty is a... 1063 00:59:11,984 --> 00:59:14,453 Okay, Louis. 1064 00:59:14,486 --> 00:59:17,056 I'll put it a different way. 1065 00:59:17,089 --> 00:59:19,892 You know who was in her room at 4:00 this morning? 1066 00:59:19,926 --> 00:59:21,894 - Oh, that. Forget it. - Forget it? 1067 00:59:21,928 --> 00:59:24,196 Listen, boys, I've got great news for you. 1068 00:59:24,230 --> 00:59:26,308 Max Kane, the producer, is coming to see the show tonight. 1069 00:59:26,332 --> 00:59:28,200 If he likes it, it goes on Broadway. 1070 00:59:28,234 --> 00:59:31,437 And Miss Kitty Rand becomes Mrs. Jeffrey Hunter, 1071 00:59:31,470 --> 00:59:33,405 so keep your fingers crossed. 1072 00:59:35,207 --> 00:59:37,877 Well, we did our best. 1073 00:59:39,445 --> 00:59:41,213 Good morning. 1074 00:59:41,247 --> 00:59:43,883 Good morning. 1075 00:59:43,916 --> 00:59:45,193 Jeff said that he won't go for the girl 1076 00:59:45,217 --> 00:59:47,029 unless the show's a hit, is that right? 1077 00:59:47,053 --> 00:59:48,520 Of course it's right. 1078 00:59:48,554 --> 00:59:50,532 It would be terrible if he married the wrong girl. 1079 00:59:50,556 --> 00:59:53,025 That might nip his whole career right in the bud. 1080 00:59:53,059 --> 00:59:54,060 So? 1081 00:59:54,093 --> 00:59:57,063 So we've got to make sure that the show is a flop. 1082 00:59:57,096 --> 00:59:58,564 Oh, sabotage. 1083 00:59:58,597 --> 01:00:00,099 That's the idea, 1084 01:00:00,132 --> 01:00:01,609 because if Kane doesn't like the show, 1085 01:00:01,633 --> 01:00:04,336 nobody else will, and Jeff won't go for Kitty. 1086 01:00:04,370 --> 01:00:06,038 He'll be awfully upset. 1087 01:00:06,072 --> 01:00:08,350 He'll get over it, and write plenty more hit plays. 1088 01:00:08,374 --> 01:00:10,585 The main thing is to save him from the clutches of that woman. 1089 01:00:10,609 --> 01:00:13,445 Good idea. Even from you. 1090 01:00:13,479 --> 01:00:14,957 Yeah, but we're gonna need some help. 1091 01:00:14,981 --> 01:00:16,448 Let's call some of the boys. 1092 01:00:16,482 --> 01:00:18,150 I'll go right to the phone. 1093 01:00:18,184 --> 01:00:21,820 For the kid's sake, this show has gotta be a bust. 1094 01:00:22,989 --> 01:00:24,256 It's all your fault. 1095 01:00:42,208 --> 01:00:44,343 How do you do? 1096 01:00:44,376 --> 01:00:46,578 Mr. Kane, it was so nice of you to come. 1097 01:00:46,612 --> 01:00:48,556 We didn't know that a big producer like you... 1098 01:00:48,580 --> 01:00:50,893 Young lady, if I didn't respect your father's position 1099 01:00:50,917 --> 01:00:52,451 in the banking world, 1100 01:00:52,484 --> 01:00:53,896 and if a producer doesn't know sometime 1101 01:00:53,920 --> 01:00:55,663 where his next mortgage is coming from, 1102 01:00:55,687 --> 01:00:57,332 I'd no more come near this show... 1103 01:00:57,356 --> 01:00:58,633 Oh, but it's a great show, Mr. Kane. 1104 01:00:58,657 --> 01:01:01,961 - You're gonna like it. - What'll you bet? 1105 01:01:07,033 --> 01:01:08,410 Now, did you give the boys their assignments? 1106 01:01:08,434 --> 01:01:10,512 They're set. I don't think I've forgotten a thing. 1107 01:01:10,536 --> 01:01:13,272 Hey, looky there. We can use him. 1108 01:01:13,305 --> 01:01:15,341 Oh, usher, come here. Usher. 1109 01:01:15,374 --> 01:01:17,019 - Usher? - You ring for ice water? 1110 01:01:17,043 --> 01:01:18,486 Certainly we rang for... Never mind that. 1111 01:01:18,510 --> 01:01:20,012 See that man down there? 1112 01:01:20,046 --> 01:01:21,689 Give him a good seat, way down in front. 1113 01:01:21,713 --> 01:01:23,325 Thank you very much. Oh, here's a little tip for you. 1114 01:01:23,349 --> 01:01:25,651 A little tip? 1115 01:01:25,684 --> 01:01:28,154 Oh, doing a little light reading? 1116 01:01:28,187 --> 01:01:30,165 I can get you a much better seat than that, better light. 1117 01:01:30,189 --> 01:01:31,323 Come this way. 1118 01:01:45,404 --> 01:01:50,376 * 1119 01:02:20,706 --> 01:02:23,051 No room out there. This is the best seat in the house. 1120 01:02:23,075 --> 01:02:24,610 Here, a little tip for you. 1121 01:02:31,183 --> 01:02:33,552 Full house. Sell-out. 1122 01:02:48,634 --> 01:02:50,202 Here, sweetheart. 1123 01:02:50,236 --> 01:02:52,171 Gee, thanks, Chic. 1124 01:05:46,712 --> 01:05:49,715 That Bronx ballerina, she ruined my performance. 1125 01:05:49,748 --> 01:05:52,184 Oh, I don't know why anyone would wanna do that. 1126 01:07:10,429 --> 01:07:11,930 Hiya, Grandma. 1127 01:07:11,963 --> 01:07:13,632 Oh, my fan, my fan. 1128 01:07:13,665 --> 01:07:15,701 Could I be of assistance? 1129 01:07:15,734 --> 01:07:16,735 Yes, thank you. 1130 01:07:18,437 --> 01:07:19,771 Well, good night, all. 1131 01:07:32,618 --> 01:07:35,297 Very, very sorry to interrupt at this time, ladies and gentlemen, 1132 01:07:35,321 --> 01:07:37,665 but there's a very urgent call for Mr. Robert T. McChesney. 1133 01:07:37,689 --> 01:07:40,726 Robert T. McChesney. 1134 01:07:40,759 --> 01:07:42,694 Go to your home immediately. 1135 01:07:42,728 --> 01:07:45,397 You have become the father of twins. 1136 01:07:45,431 --> 01:07:46,732 Robert T. McChesney. 1137 01:07:50,902 --> 01:07:55,040 What am I running for? My name's Miller. 1138 01:07:55,073 --> 01:07:57,585 - Kitty, what's happened? What's going on? - I don't know. 1139 01:07:57,609 --> 01:07:59,759 Come on, girls, give this number everything. 1140 01:08:11,590 --> 01:08:13,725 Say, what's the idea of this? 1141 01:08:13,759 --> 01:08:15,461 Oh, my coat just had pups. 1142 01:08:15,494 --> 01:08:18,464 I wanted to talk to the... 1143 01:08:18,497 --> 01:08:19,965 Never mind. 1144 01:08:19,998 --> 01:08:20,998 Yeah. 1145 01:08:22,734 --> 01:08:25,371 * With a pom or peke 1146 01:08:25,404 --> 01:08:28,006 * Strolls along the thoroughfare * 1147 01:08:28,039 --> 01:08:30,909 Mrs. Jones! 1148 01:08:30,942 --> 01:08:33,945 Mrs. Jones! 1149 01:08:33,979 --> 01:08:35,514 Mrs. Jones! 1150 01:08:35,547 --> 01:08:39,084 * Every girl a beautiful charade * 1151 01:08:39,117 --> 01:08:43,389 * They pirouette and pose a while * 1152 01:08:43,422 --> 01:08:46,558 * And invite a smile 1153 01:08:46,592 --> 01:08:51,830 * When they're putting on the dog * 1154 01:08:51,863 --> 01:08:54,900 * They pass in review 1155 01:08:54,933 --> 01:08:56,868 * On each avenue 1156 01:08:56,902 --> 01:09:01,707 * Exotic, blasé 1157 01:09:01,740 --> 01:09:05,043 * Wherever they go 1158 01:09:05,076 --> 01:09:08,614 * They put on their show 1159 01:09:08,647 --> 01:09:12,818 * It all began with Eve 1160 01:09:12,851 --> 01:09:16,822 * Catching every eye 1161 01:09:16,855 --> 01:09:21,960 * Captivating every passerby * 1162 01:09:21,993 --> 01:09:26,031 * They've such a charming unconcern * 1163 01:09:26,064 --> 01:09:29,367 Andrew, my fur's on the floor. 1164 01:09:57,896 --> 01:09:59,631 Here. This is what you like. 1165 01:09:59,665 --> 01:10:01,166 Take 'em. 1166 01:10:07,138 --> 01:10:09,541 This thing is getting good. 1167 01:10:09,575 --> 01:10:11,176 Jeff hasn't overlooked a trick. 1168 01:10:26,892 --> 01:10:28,570 * Way down on the levee in old Alabamy * 1169 01:10:28,594 --> 01:10:31,697 * There's Daddy and Mammy, there's Ephraim and Sammy * 1170 01:10:31,730 --> 01:10:34,866 * On a moonlight night you can find them all * 1171 01:10:34,900 --> 01:10:37,669 * While they are waitin', the banjos are syncopatin' * 1172 01:10:37,703 --> 01:10:39,170 * What's that they're sayin'? 1173 01:10:39,204 --> 01:10:41,039 * Oh, what's that they're sayin'? * 1174 01:10:41,072 --> 01:10:43,742 * While they keep playin', I'm hummin' and swayin' * 1175 01:10:43,775 --> 01:10:46,645 * It's the good ship Robert E. Lee * 1176 01:10:46,678 --> 01:10:49,548 * That's come to carry the cotton away * 1177 01:10:54,620 --> 01:10:57,255 * Watch them shufflin' along * 1178 01:10:57,288 --> 01:11:00,091 * See them shufflin' along * 1179 01:11:00,125 --> 01:11:06,832 * Go down to the levee, I said to the levee * 1180 01:11:06,865 --> 01:11:10,068 * I said to the levee, I said to the levee * 1181 01:11:10,101 --> 01:11:11,513 * The levee, the levee, the levee, the levee * 1182 01:11:11,537 --> 01:11:12,880 * The levee, the levee the levee, the levee * 1183 01:11:12,904 --> 01:11:14,616 * The levee, the levee, the levee, the levee * 1184 01:11:14,640 --> 01:11:17,042 * The levee, the levee, the levee, the levee * 1185 01:11:17,075 --> 01:11:19,875 * The levee, the levee, the levee, the levee, the levee * 1186 01:11:29,220 --> 01:11:31,723 * Join that shufflin' throng 1187 01:11:31,757 --> 01:11:34,593 * Hear that music and song * 1188 01:11:34,626 --> 01:11:36,562 * It's simply great, mate 1189 01:11:36,595 --> 01:11:38,263 * Waitin' on the levee 1190 01:11:38,296 --> 01:11:41,099 * Waitin' for the Robert E. Lee * 1191 01:11:42,801 --> 01:11:46,237 * Watch them shufflin' along 1192 01:11:48,039 --> 01:11:52,310 * So take your best gal, real pal * 1193 01:11:52,343 --> 01:11:55,246 * Go down to the levee, I said to the levee * 1194 01:11:55,280 --> 01:11:58,249 * Join that shufflin' throng 1195 01:11:58,283 --> 01:12:00,151 * Hear that music and song 1196 01:12:01,720 --> 01:12:03,088 * It's simply great, mate 1197 01:12:03,121 --> 01:12:04,823 * Waitin' on the levee 1198 01:12:04,856 --> 01:12:07,926 * Waitin' for the Robert E. Lee * 1199 01:12:07,959 --> 01:12:10,996 * Way down on the levee in old Alabamy * 1200 01:12:11,029 --> 01:12:14,032 * There's Daddy and Mammy, there's Ephraim and Sammy * 1201 01:12:14,065 --> 01:12:18,003 * On a moonlight night you can find them all * 1202 01:12:18,036 --> 01:12:20,806 * While they are waitin', the banjos are syncopatin' * 1203 01:12:20,839 --> 01:12:23,618 * What's that they're sayin', what's that they're sayin'? * 1204 01:12:23,642 --> 01:12:26,244 * While I keep a-prayin', I'm hoppin' and swayin' * 1205 01:12:26,277 --> 01:12:29,147 * It's the good ship Robert E. Lee * 1206 01:12:29,180 --> 01:12:33,051 * That's come to carry the cotton away * 1207 01:12:42,894 --> 01:12:43,894 Boo! 1208 01:12:47,265 --> 01:12:48,265 Boo! 1209 01:13:02,648 --> 01:13:06,151 * Watch them shufflin' along * 1210 01:13:06,184 --> 01:13:07,795 There's a little thing back there, 1211 01:13:07,819 --> 01:13:09,187 and it goes like that. 1212 01:13:09,220 --> 01:13:11,757 * Along 1213 01:13:15,894 --> 01:13:20,832 * Watch them shufflin' along * 1214 01:13:20,866 --> 01:13:24,135 * It's simply great, mate, waitin' on the levee * 1215 01:13:24,169 --> 01:13:28,874 * Waitin' for the Robert E. Lee * 1216 01:13:46,257 --> 01:13:47,759 You crabbed my act. 1217 01:13:47,793 --> 01:13:49,170 Wait a minute. We did it for Jeff's sake 1218 01:13:49,194 --> 01:13:50,929 so he wouldn't marry Kitty. 1219 01:13:50,962 --> 01:13:52,039 Who cares? I'm gonna blow you two to bits. 1220 01:13:52,063 --> 01:13:53,908 We saw Prince Pepi come out of her room at 4:00 a.m. 1221 01:13:53,932 --> 01:13:55,810 Sure, he was in her room, but he was in there with me. 1222 01:13:55,834 --> 01:13:57,235 - You?! - Yes, me. 1223 01:13:57,268 --> 01:13:59,568 Now you guys stand back and take your medicine. 1224 01:14:04,876 --> 01:14:06,688 We ruined our pal, that's what we've done. 1225 01:14:06,712 --> 01:14:08,246 Jeff will murder us for this. 1226 01:14:08,279 --> 01:14:10,081 Where are those two baboons? 1227 01:14:10,115 --> 01:14:11,759 - We've gotta do a disappearing act. - Yeah, but how? 1228 01:14:11,783 --> 01:14:13,018 Disappearing act. 1229 01:14:13,051 --> 01:14:16,087 - I can help you out. - I'm a magician. 1230 01:14:16,121 --> 01:14:17,422 You can make us disappear? 1231 01:14:17,455 --> 01:14:19,691 Oh, yes, oh, yes. Zip the zipper. 1232 01:14:19,725 --> 01:14:21,235 I saw it in pictures one time, great trick. 1233 01:14:21,259 --> 01:14:23,237 I used to make guinea pigs disappear by the thousands. 1234 01:14:23,261 --> 01:14:24,963 I often wonder what became of 'em. 1235 01:14:24,996 --> 01:14:26,264 All you do is this. 1236 01:14:28,133 --> 01:14:29,467 Like this. 1237 01:14:31,469 --> 01:14:33,304 Something's the matter, I'm stuck. 1238 01:14:33,338 --> 01:14:35,040 You got it all wrong. 1239 01:14:35,073 --> 01:14:37,151 I saw that picture. You're supposed to zip it down. 1240 01:14:37,175 --> 01:14:40,178 Like this. 1241 01:14:40,211 --> 01:14:42,313 Hey. 1242 01:14:42,347 --> 01:14:44,291 Hey, wait a minute. I can't get outta this. 1243 01:14:44,315 --> 01:14:45,984 You look better that way. 1244 01:14:46,017 --> 01:14:49,921 Ole, I can't get it back either. 1245 01:14:49,955 --> 01:14:52,299 Easy, he says. All you gotta do is zip the zipper. 1246 01:14:52,323 --> 01:14:54,025 Well, you've got me all mixed up. 1247 01:14:54,059 --> 01:14:55,837 Oh, you've been mixed up since the day you were born. 1248 01:14:55,861 --> 01:14:57,863 Why, you sawed-off little runt. 1249 01:14:57,896 --> 01:14:59,831 Runt?! 1250 01:15:01,900 --> 01:15:04,202 Where are you? 1251 01:15:04,235 --> 01:15:05,980 Someday I have to figure a way to get them out of this thing. 1252 01:15:06,004 --> 01:15:07,906 Have you seen those two imbeciles? 1253 01:15:07,939 --> 01:15:09,516 Come out of there. Come on down, where are you? 1254 01:15:09,540 --> 01:15:11,109 Don't let him in. 1255 01:15:11,142 --> 01:15:12,477 That's Pepi. He's after us. 1256 01:15:12,510 --> 01:15:15,513 - What'll we do? Hide. - Hurry. 1257 01:15:15,546 --> 01:15:17,792 Wait a minute, what are you trying to do, climb out the window? 1258 01:15:17,816 --> 01:15:19,193 - Why don't you make up your mind? - Hurry up. 1259 01:15:19,217 --> 01:15:22,163 This is no time for dancing. Come over here. Get behind me quick. 1260 01:15:22,187 --> 01:15:24,687 Look at them over there. Half man and half nothing. 1261 01:15:27,893 --> 01:15:30,028 What's going on here? 1262 01:15:30,061 --> 01:15:31,763 Where? 1263 01:15:31,797 --> 01:15:33,198 Oh, double talk. 1264 01:15:33,231 --> 01:15:35,967 Who are you looking at, you pasty-faced Pomeranian? 1265 01:15:36,001 --> 01:15:37,912 Did you call me a pasty-faced Pomeranian? 1266 01:15:37,936 --> 01:15:39,170 I certainly did. 1267 01:15:39,204 --> 01:15:40,505 Listen, you... 1268 01:15:40,538 --> 01:15:42,083 Well, we have things to attend to. 1269 01:15:42,107 --> 01:15:43,174 Let's go. 1270 01:15:44,843 --> 01:15:46,812 Ole, come here. Hurry up, quick! 1271 01:15:51,482 --> 01:15:53,127 Let's get out of here before Jeff catches us. 1272 01:15:53,151 --> 01:15:55,821 Just a minute. 1273 01:16:02,393 --> 01:16:03,929 Home, James. 1274 01:16:05,030 --> 01:16:07,398 Hurry and get into your conga clothes. 1275 01:16:07,432 --> 01:16:09,210 We've got to do something to save this show. 1276 01:16:09,234 --> 01:16:10,535 I know, I know. 1277 01:16:10,568 --> 01:16:12,203 Halt. 1278 01:16:12,237 --> 01:16:14,339 About face. 1279 01:16:15,841 --> 01:16:17,542 Go. 1280 01:16:17,575 --> 01:16:19,911 Characters. 1281 01:16:40,365 --> 01:16:42,167 You got us into this, now get us out. 1282 01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:44,178 Hurry up. What do you have to do to unzip us? 1283 01:16:44,202 --> 01:16:46,080 We can't go around dressed like this the rest of our lives. 1284 01:16:46,104 --> 01:16:47,982 I never did figure out that part of the trick. 1285 01:16:48,006 --> 01:16:49,483 I never could make that guinea pig visible. 1286 01:16:49,507 --> 01:16:51,242 What? You did that to us? 1287 01:16:51,276 --> 01:16:53,178 Yes. 1288 01:16:58,016 --> 01:16:59,894 If his spirit leaves him, we're done for. 1289 01:16:59,918 --> 01:17:02,053 - Mr. Jordan. - Mr. Jordan. 1290 01:17:02,087 --> 01:17:04,389 Throw some water on my face. My face here. 1291 01:17:07,458 --> 01:17:09,928 Not in my face, in his face. 1292 01:17:16,902 --> 01:17:18,503 Come on, do something. 1293 01:17:18,536 --> 01:17:19,938 Yeah, unzip us. 1294 01:17:19,971 --> 01:17:21,106 Well, I'll try. 1295 01:17:22,607 --> 01:17:24,976 No, no, no, no! 1296 01:17:26,577 --> 01:17:28,222 Now we're not here at all anymore. 1297 01:17:28,246 --> 01:17:30,048 Well, well, well. 1298 01:17:30,081 --> 01:17:32,450 Say hello to my guinea pigs if you see 'em. 1299 01:17:32,483 --> 01:17:33,527 Come on, Princey, we're on. 1300 01:17:33,551 --> 01:17:35,120 We're on, but the show is off. 1301 01:17:35,153 --> 01:17:37,088 Those two maniacs spoiled everything. 1302 01:17:37,122 --> 01:17:39,233 Don't you call those two crazy idiots maniacs. 1303 01:17:39,257 --> 01:17:41,459 Why, they put this whole show over. 1304 01:17:41,492 --> 01:17:43,929 - What? - I'll tell you after the number. 1305 01:17:43,962 --> 01:17:46,497 Who did that? 1306 01:17:46,531 --> 01:17:48,499 Did you say we put it over? 1307 01:17:48,533 --> 01:17:51,269 Ole. Hey, Ole, where are you? 1308 01:17:51,302 --> 01:17:53,438 Never mind, we're here. What happened? 1309 01:17:53,471 --> 01:17:56,274 Oh, plenty. Mr. Kane said the show's a sockeroo, a wham. 1310 01:17:56,307 --> 01:17:58,343 In fact, he says it's good. 1311 01:17:58,376 --> 01:18:00,211 Oh, brother. Where's Jeff? 1312 01:18:00,245 --> 01:18:03,314 Holy smokes, Jeff. I almost forgot about him. 1313 01:18:03,348 --> 01:18:05,927 Well, he's probably packed up and back in town by this time. 1314 01:18:05,951 --> 01:18:08,186 Come on, Ole, we've gotta get him fast. 1315 01:18:09,620 --> 01:18:11,170 I don't get it. Maybe I'm wrong. 1316 01:18:14,960 --> 01:18:18,496 * 1317 01:18:21,699 --> 01:18:23,969 * Till you've done the conga beso * 1318 01:18:24,002 --> 01:18:26,037 * You don't know what you've missed * 1319 01:18:26,071 --> 01:18:29,340 * It's the Cuban conga with a Yankee twist * 1320 01:18:29,374 --> 01:18:32,944 * You won't even mind if you need rehearsal * 1321 01:18:32,978 --> 01:18:36,681 * Try it and you'll find why it's universal * 1322 01:18:36,714 --> 01:18:40,385 * Dance the conga beso, one and two and three, kiss * 1323 01:18:40,418 --> 01:18:44,155 * Doesn't cost a peso, one and two and three, kiss * 1324 01:18:44,189 --> 01:18:47,425 * It will make you gay, so, dance the conga beso * 1325 01:18:47,458 --> 01:18:51,062 * It's a bit you can't miss, one and two and three, kiss * 1326 01:18:51,096 --> 01:18:53,098 * When you're on the dance floor * 1327 01:18:53,131 --> 01:18:55,200 * Why just dance? 1328 01:18:55,233 --> 01:18:58,569 * Take your Terpsichore and mix it with romance * 1329 01:18:58,603 --> 01:19:02,173 * Rhumbas are passé, so, maybe you should try this * 1330 01:19:02,207 --> 01:19:05,643 * Dance the conga beso, one and two and three, kiss * 1331 01:19:05,676 --> 01:19:07,545 * One and two and three, kiss 1332 01:19:07,578 --> 01:19:09,614 * One and two and three, kiss * 1333 01:19:09,647 --> 01:19:11,582 * One and two and three, kiss * 1334 01:19:13,218 --> 01:19:15,020 Wait a minute! 1335 01:19:15,053 --> 01:19:16,988 Cut it out! Chick, Ole. 1336 01:19:17,022 --> 01:19:20,358 Cut it out, will ya? Quit shovin' me around. 1337 01:19:20,391 --> 01:19:22,527 Hey, what's going on here? 1338 01:19:22,560 --> 01:19:24,238 I don't know what you did or how you did it, 1339 01:19:24,262 --> 01:19:25,430 but it's terrific. 1340 01:19:25,463 --> 01:19:27,565 Get his checkbook, Ole. 1341 01:19:29,600 --> 01:19:31,502 Okay, you get his pen. 1342 01:19:34,305 --> 01:19:35,673 Like the show, huh? 1343 01:19:35,706 --> 01:19:38,209 Start writing, Mr. Kane. 1344 01:19:38,243 --> 01:19:40,045 What can I lose? 1345 01:19:40,078 --> 01:19:43,048 * 1346 01:19:43,081 --> 01:19:46,451 * Dance the conga beso, one and two and three, kiss * 1347 01:19:46,484 --> 01:19:50,188 * Doesn't cost a peso, one and two and three, kiss * 1348 01:19:50,221 --> 01:19:53,558 * It'll make you gay, so, dance the conga beso * 1349 01:19:53,591 --> 01:19:57,228 * It's a beat you can't miss, one and two and three, kiss * 1350 01:19:57,262 --> 01:20:01,032 * When you're on the dance floor, why just dance? * 1351 01:20:01,066 --> 01:20:04,435 * Take your Terpsichore and mix it with romance * 1352 01:20:04,469 --> 01:20:08,106 * Rhumbas are passé, so, maybe you should try this * 1353 01:20:08,139 --> 01:20:11,509 * Dance the conga beso, one and two and three, kiss * 1354 01:20:11,542 --> 01:20:13,611 * One and two and three, kiss 1355 01:20:13,644 --> 01:20:15,280 * One and two and three, kiss * 1356 01:20:15,313 --> 01:20:17,182 * One and two and three, kiss 1357 01:20:17,215 --> 01:20:18,549 * Dance the conga beso 1358 01:20:18,583 --> 01:20:20,585 * One and two and three, kiss * 1359 01:20:20,618 --> 01:20:22,253 * Doesn't cost a peso 1360 01:20:22,287 --> 01:20:24,055 * One and two and three, kiss * 1361 01:20:24,089 --> 01:20:25,756 * Oh, it will make you gay, so * 1362 01:20:25,790 --> 01:20:27,592 * Dance the conga beso 1363 01:20:27,625 --> 01:20:29,460 * Now it's a beat you can't miss * 1364 01:20:29,494 --> 01:20:31,529 * One and two and three, kiss * 1365 01:20:31,562 --> 01:20:33,212 * When you're on the dance floor * 1366 01:20:35,400 --> 01:20:37,602 * Dance the conga beso 1367 01:20:37,635 --> 01:20:39,570 * One and two and three, kiss * 1368 01:20:39,604 --> 01:20:41,306 * One and two and three, kiss 1369 01:20:41,339 --> 01:20:43,174 * One and two and three, kiss * 1370 01:20:43,208 --> 01:20:44,675 * One and two and three, kiss 1371 01:20:56,887 --> 01:20:58,656 Oh, bit me. 1372 01:20:58,689 --> 01:21:01,559 Oh, Bessie, my pet guinea pig. 1373 01:21:01,592 --> 01:21:03,128 You've been absent for months. 1374 01:21:03,161 --> 01:21:04,371 How did you get unzipped? 1375 01:21:04,395 --> 01:21:06,197 What? 1376 01:21:06,231 --> 01:21:08,766 Yeah? As simple as that? 1377 01:21:08,799 --> 01:21:11,169 Oh, a cape, a cape. Oh, a cape, okay. 1378 01:21:11,202 --> 01:21:13,271 Everybody's having fun but us. 1379 01:21:13,304 --> 01:21:15,206 Yeah, you made us invisible. 1380 01:21:15,240 --> 01:21:17,142 Now make us reappear. 1381 01:21:26,417 --> 01:21:28,119 * Dance the conga beso 1382 01:21:28,153 --> 01:21:30,188 Mrs. Jones! 1383 01:21:30,221 --> 01:21:32,157 * Dance the conga beso 1384 01:21:32,190 --> 01:21:34,225 Mrs. Jones! 1385 01:21:34,259 --> 01:21:37,162 * It will make you gay, so, dance the conga beso * 1386 01:21:37,195 --> 01:21:39,130 * It's a beat you can't miss 1387 01:21:39,164 --> 01:21:41,766 Ha ha ha, you missed me. You need glasses. 1388 01:21:41,799 --> 01:21:44,435 Can you imagine that? A talking bear. 1389 01:21:44,469 --> 01:21:48,139 * Take your Terpsichore and mix it with romance * 1390 01:21:48,173 --> 01:21:51,676 * Rhumbas are passé, so, maybe you should try this * 1391 01:21:51,709 --> 01:21:54,612 * Dance the conga beso, one and two and three, kiss * 1392 01:21:54,645 --> 01:21:56,414 * One and two and three, kiss * 1393 01:21:56,447 --> 01:21:58,383 * One and two and three, kiss 1394 01:21:58,416 --> 01:22:02,253 * One and two and three, kiss * 1395 01:22:02,287 --> 01:22:04,155 * Conga beso! 1396 01:22:04,189 --> 01:22:05,699 "Max Kane produces the show off-Broadway, 1397 01:22:05,723 --> 01:22:07,225 where it's a big hit, 1398 01:22:07,258 --> 01:22:09,427 and Kitty and Jeff live happily ever after." 1399 01:22:09,460 --> 01:22:11,460 Nice work, Selby. I knew you could do it. 1400 01:22:12,963 --> 01:22:15,266 Talking bears, talking dogs, 1401 01:22:15,300 --> 01:22:17,535 people who disappear, slapstick comedy. 1402 01:22:17,568 --> 01:22:18,645 What kind of a script is that? 1403 01:22:18,669 --> 01:22:19,813 Well, I didn't tell you, 1404 01:22:19,837 --> 01:22:21,672 but I saw Hellzapoppin' in New York, 1405 01:22:21,706 --> 01:22:23,184 and I thought it was very funny. 1406 01:22:23,208 --> 01:22:24,808 Well, here's what I think of it. 1407 01:22:25,743 --> 01:22:27,645 Well, you can't hurt me that way. 1408 01:22:27,678 --> 01:22:29,547 I always wear a bulletproof vest 1409 01:22:29,580 --> 01:22:31,382 around the studios. 1410 01:22:39,757 --> 01:22:41,226 * Hellzapoppin' 1411 01:22:41,259 --> 01:22:43,761 * Old Satan's on a tear Hellzapoppin'! * 1412 01:22:43,794 --> 01:22:45,530 * They're screaming everywhere * 1413 01:22:45,563 --> 01:22:48,233 * Shades of inferno and vaudeville * 1414 01:22:48,266 --> 01:22:51,236 * Anything can happen and it probably will * 1415 01:22:51,269 --> 01:22:52,737 * Hellzapoppin'! 1416 01:22:52,770 --> 01:22:54,372 * And there's a rumor now 1417 01:22:54,405 --> 01:22:57,308 * You'll be needing your sense of humor now * 1418 01:22:57,342 --> 01:22:59,877 * How it will wind up no one can tell * 1419 01:22:59,910 --> 01:23:02,213 * But hellzapoppin' like... 1420 01:23:04,949 --> 01:23:06,484 * Hellzapoppin'! 1421 01:23:06,517 --> 01:23:08,953 * Da ya, da ya, da ya 1422 01:23:08,986 --> 01:23:10,921 * Hellzapoppin'! 1423 01:23:10,955 --> 01:23:12,590 * They're screaming everywhere * 1424 01:23:12,623 --> 01:23:15,526 * Shades of inferno and vaudeville * 1425 01:23:15,560 --> 01:23:18,396 * Anything can happen and it probably will * 1426 01:23:18,429 --> 01:23:20,265 * Hellzapoppin'! 1427 01:23:20,298 --> 01:23:23,234 * Da, da, da-do, da, da-do * 1428 01:23:23,268 --> 01:23:26,471 * You'll be needing your sense of humor now * 1429 01:23:26,504 --> 01:23:28,773 * How it will wind up no one can tell * 1430 01:23:28,806 --> 01:23:30,941 * But hellzapoppin' like... 96968