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1
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:30,095
Becker's here.
2
00:00:35,233 --> 00:00:36,701
You know what I like
about this place?
3
00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:39,003
Any time I walk in,
there's always a seat.
4
00:00:39,972 --> 00:00:41,005
Morning, John.
5
00:00:41,007 --> 00:00:42,106
Yeah, you know--
6
00:00:42,108 --> 00:00:44,108
You know
what's killing this country?
7
00:00:44,110 --> 00:00:46,845
Those idiotic TV talk shows.
8
00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:48,079
You know,
I watched one last night.
9
00:00:48,081 --> 00:00:50,715
I should have just
stuck a fork in my eye.
10
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,351
You know, it's like
America stepped in something
11
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:56,888
and is scraping off its shoe
directly over my TV set.
12
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:59,758
I'm telling you,
Jerry Springer, Jenny Jones,
13
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:02,994
they're all broadcasting
straight from hell.
14
00:01:02,996 --> 00:01:04,995
You know, I watched
one the other day.
15
00:01:04,997 --> 00:01:06,698
I don't even know
what the hell it was.
16
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:08,667
Apparently, some guy
wanted to be a woman,
17
00:01:08,669 --> 00:01:10,569
so he chops it off.
18
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:12,870
Then he decides
he likes chicks after all,
19
00:01:12,872 --> 00:01:14,872
so he becomes a lesbian.
20
00:01:16,308 --> 00:01:19,577
Tell me there's not a wasted
step in there somewhere.
21
00:01:22,715 --> 00:01:24,916
You know, Becker, you
could have changed the channel.
22
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:25,984
I did.
23
00:01:25,986 --> 00:01:27,385
I ran across a bisexual guy
24
00:01:27,387 --> 00:01:30,087
having a three-way
with his aunt and his uncle.
25
00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:34,192
I tell you, if I were his dog,
I'd be on my toes.
26
00:01:35,661 --> 00:01:38,964
Well, here's a wacky idea:
turn it off.
27
00:01:38,966 --> 00:01:39,865
Don't you get it, Reggie?
28
00:01:39,867 --> 00:01:42,667
He leaves the TV on
so he can get upset.
29
00:01:42,669 --> 00:01:44,903
Hey, nobody called on you.
30
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:47,004
It doesn't matter
if you turn the set off.
31
00:01:47,006 --> 00:01:48,906
The people
are still in there.
32
00:01:48,908 --> 00:01:51,175
Frankly, I like knowing
exactly what they're up to.
33
00:01:51,177 --> 00:01:52,544
Trust me on this one.
34
00:01:52,546 --> 00:01:55,112
White trash;
it's the only natural resource
35
00:01:55,114 --> 00:01:57,649
this country
will never run out of.
36
00:01:57,651 --> 00:02:00,719
You're really
a miserable human being.
37
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:02,220
Doesn't mean I'm not right.
38
00:02:04,223 --> 00:02:08,226
You know something?
I'm sorry your father died.
39
00:02:08,228 --> 00:02:09,827
You know, when he
was running this place,
40
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:11,997
he was a lot nicer
to me than you are.
41
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:14,666
My father
was hard of hearing.
42
00:02:16,134 --> 00:02:17,936
Just give me one of
my cigarettes, will ya?
43
00:02:17,938 --> 00:02:19,103
Why don't you get
a nicotine patch
44
00:02:19,105 --> 00:02:20,772
like the rest of the world?
45
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:23,508
I tried one.
They're too hard to light.
46
00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:24,542
Jake?
47
00:02:24,544 --> 00:02:25,876
Yeah.
48
00:02:25,878 --> 00:02:27,545
You don't want people
to know you're blind,
49
00:02:27,547 --> 00:02:29,581
you might wanna stare
into that shiny metal part
50
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:31,749
instead of directly
at the napkin.
51
00:02:36,689 --> 00:02:38,223
Oh. Damn!
Right.
52
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:42,126
So, uh, John,
how much will you pay me
53
00:02:42,128 --> 00:02:43,595
not to go down to your office
54
00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:46,097
and tell Margaret you're still
sneaking cigarettes, huh?
55
00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:47,165
How much will you pay me
56
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:50,135
not to paint
your white cane brown?
57
00:02:50,137 --> 00:02:52,369
You know, if you ever
pick up a handicap,
58
00:02:52,371 --> 00:02:54,839
I'm gonna be all over you.
59
00:02:56,642 --> 00:03:00,312
All right, John,
I'll see you tomorrow.
60
00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:02,247
And, Reggie,
I'll see you for lunch.
61
00:03:02,249 --> 00:03:04,115
Okay, Jake, have a nice day.
62
00:03:04,117 --> 00:03:05,116
Yeah, well, I'd better hurry
63
00:03:05,118 --> 00:03:06,384
if I'm gonna get
where I need to go.
64
00:03:11,123 --> 00:03:12,190
Phew!
65
00:03:15,494 --> 00:03:16,761
Hey, John,
you're killing me here.
66
00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:18,662
Why don't you park that smelly,
oil-burning
67
00:03:18,664 --> 00:03:20,265
heap of yours
down the street, huh?
68
00:03:20,267 --> 00:03:22,934
You're just jealous, Jake,
that you can't drive it.
69
00:03:22,936 --> 00:03:24,569
Looks like he already did.
70
00:03:27,006 --> 00:03:30,575
You know something?
You both can go to hell.
71
00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:32,043
Now, if you'll excuse me,
72
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,947
it's time for me to go heal
the sick and comfort the dying.
73
00:03:35,949 --> 00:03:37,115
So, what do you think,
74
00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:39,050
that stethoscope
is gonna stop people from seeing
75
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,987
the stains on your shirt
and the stubble on your face?
76
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:43,921
The not-shaving is a look.
77
00:03:43,923 --> 00:03:46,491
I saw it in a cologne ad.
78
00:03:46,493 --> 00:03:48,025
As far as the clothes,
what's the point?
79
00:03:48,027 --> 00:03:50,161
I can almost guarantee you
by the end of the day
80
00:03:50,163 --> 00:03:53,197
some kid will have
thrown up on me.
81
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:55,033
Well, then, it's true
what they say.
82
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:57,802
Kids are wonderful
judges of character.
83
00:03:59,104 --> 00:04:00,671
Bite me.
84
00:04:04,609 --> 00:04:08,713
You sure he's really a doctor?
I mean, he's such an ass.
85
00:04:08,715 --> 00:04:12,016
He's not just a doctor,
he's a brilliant one.
86
00:04:12,018 --> 00:04:14,118
As far as I can tell,
that's his only flaw.
87
00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:16,220
Otherwise,
he'd be a perfect ass.
88
00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:32,436
I know, I know,
I know, I'm late.
89
00:04:33,906 --> 00:04:37,174
You're late!
And you forgot to shave.
90
00:04:37,176 --> 00:04:38,843
No, I didn't. It's a look.
91
00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:41,779
Well, it's
not a good look.
92
00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,948
And you've been smoking.
I can smell it.
93
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:45,082
That's not true, Margaret.
94
00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:47,919
It was Jake
down at the newsstand.
95
00:04:47,921 --> 00:04:48,986
He blew it all over me.
96
00:04:48,988 --> 00:04:52,157
What was I gonna do,
yell at a blind guy?
97
00:04:52,159 --> 00:04:54,993
John Becker,
you're a damn liar.
98
00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:57,829
Mrs. Zellman's in 1.
Oh, perfect.
99
00:04:57,831 --> 00:05:01,032
How's she doing today?
All hands on deck?
100
00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:02,300
Well, she remembered her teeth.
101
00:05:04,870 --> 00:05:06,838
Well, thank God for that.
102
00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:08,973
Otherwise, it's like
talking to a sock puppet.
103
00:05:10,276 --> 00:05:12,043
Whoa, get back.
Back, back, back, back, back.
104
00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:14,245
Mr. Capelli's waiting in 2.
Yeah.
105
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:16,081
Marvin Johnson
is in your office.
106
00:05:16,083 --> 00:05:17,682
You wanna tell me
why they're here, please?
107
00:05:17,684 --> 00:05:19,717
Not especially. That's why
I gave you their charts.
108
00:05:22,287 --> 00:05:27,024
Aw, jeez! Mrs. Zellman,
put your clothes back on!
109
00:05:27,026 --> 00:05:28,993
You're here
about an eye infection.
110
00:05:30,730 --> 00:05:32,997
Serves you right
for being late.
111
00:05:35,701 --> 00:05:37,701
Hey, doc,
how you doing?
112
00:05:40,071 --> 00:05:41,973
What?
113
00:05:41,975 --> 00:05:43,675
That diet I put you on.
114
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:46,977
The one you asked me for.
Right.
115
00:05:46,979 --> 00:05:48,680
Perhaps I didn't
make myself clear.
116
00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:51,316
You have to do more than
just read the piece of paper.
117
00:05:52,418 --> 00:05:54,285
You've gained six pounds.
118
00:05:54,287 --> 00:05:55,853
You sure about that, doc?
119
00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:58,623
'Cause, you know,
this sweater is pretty bulky.
120
00:05:58,625 --> 00:06:01,392
Yeah, right.
It's the sweater.
121
00:06:01,394 --> 00:06:02,627
I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do.
122
00:06:02,629 --> 00:06:04,662
I'm gonna stand
way over here,
123
00:06:04,664 --> 00:06:07,432
and I'm gonna give you
my diagnosis, free of charge.
124
00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:08,800
Your blood pressure's
too high,
125
00:06:08,802 --> 00:06:10,602
your cholesterol's
through the roof,
126
00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:12,303
and your legs are killing you.
127
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:13,371
But then why wouldn't they be?
128
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,673
Look what
they're trying to hold up.
129
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:17,041
Geez, doc,
I kind of thought that--
130
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,409
Kind of thought what?
131
00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:19,744
That I'd give you
a pat on that continent
132
00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:21,179
you call a butt?
133
00:06:21,181 --> 00:06:23,281
Tell you everything's gonna be
fine and send you home?
134
00:06:23,283 --> 00:06:25,950
Whoa, whoa, aren't doctors
supposed to be nice?
135
00:06:25,952 --> 00:06:29,086
Check out the Hippocratic Oath.
It doesn't mention nice.
136
00:06:30,222 --> 00:06:32,423
Look,
Mr. Capelli, I like you.
137
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:35,659
More importantly, your wife
and your kids probably love you.
138
00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:37,261
So if you care
about them at all,
139
00:06:37,263 --> 00:06:39,297
or, hell, if you
just care about yourself,
140
00:06:39,299 --> 00:06:42,066
I want you to remember
this one word:
141
00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:43,701
salad.
142
00:06:47,106 --> 00:06:50,041
Hey, you can do this.
143
00:06:52,844 --> 00:06:54,312
Morning, doctor.
144
00:06:54,314 --> 00:06:56,481
Ah, yeah, good morning...?
145
00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:57,482
Linda.
146
00:06:57,484 --> 00:06:58,616
Right, right.
147
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,451
I knew it was
something weird like that.
148
00:07:03,222 --> 00:07:04,856
I know you said
never to talk to you
149
00:07:04,858 --> 00:07:06,758
unless it was absolutely
necessary--
Right.
150
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,092
--but I-I just
wanna say thanks a lot
151
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:09,394
for making me a nurse's aide.
152
00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:11,963
I never thought
I'd be a professional anything.
153
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,965
And this is way better
154
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:15,700
than sweeping up hair
at a beauty salon.
155
00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:17,735
Although the fumes
from those hair dyes
156
00:07:17,737 --> 00:07:19,804
can give you
a pretty good buzz.
157
00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:20,638
You know--
158
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:21,972
You know, this one time,
I had a--
159
00:07:21,974 --> 00:07:24,008
If you shut your mouth,
160
00:07:24,010 --> 00:07:27,145
it keeps the words
from just falling out like that.
161
00:07:27,147 --> 00:07:29,747
I know. I know, I talk too much,
and I'm working on that.
162
00:07:29,749 --> 00:07:33,051
But you just don't know
what it's like in here.
163
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:36,054
All these thoughts
keep flying around, and...
164
00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:39,424
I'm sensing a little hostility.
165
00:07:39,426 --> 00:07:40,725
Go with that.
166
00:07:40,727 --> 00:07:41,960
You mean--?
I mean go.
167
00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:42,693
Yeah.
168
00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:49,533
Hey, doc?
169
00:07:49,535 --> 00:07:50,868
Yeah?
170
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:53,471
What's this?
171
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,406
Uh...that's called an ovary.
172
00:07:56,875 --> 00:07:58,810
Don't worry about it.
You don't have one.
173
00:08:00,512 --> 00:08:01,880
Where's your mother?
174
00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:03,814
She had to work,
but my brother brought me.
175
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:05,016
Should I get him?
176
00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:06,150
No, no, that's all right.
177
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,553
You and I can have
a little talk right here.
178
00:08:12,224 --> 00:08:13,491
So, what's the deal?
179
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:17,495
Well, M.J.,
the deal kind of stinks.
180
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:21,866
Remember last week how we talked
about good and bad blood cells?
181
00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:22,766
Yeah.
182
00:08:22,768 --> 00:08:25,436
Well, the bad guys are--
Are winning.
183
00:08:25,438 --> 00:08:27,639
You mean, my T cells
are down again?
184
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:30,408
Boy, you're getting
the hang of this, aren't you?
185
00:08:30,410 --> 00:08:32,243
Uh, yes,
they are, but I, uh--
186
00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:33,844
I don't want you
to worry about it,
187
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:36,047
'cause I'm gonna try to come
up with something new for you.
188
00:08:36,049 --> 00:08:37,815
I could use a new bike.
189
00:08:39,384 --> 00:08:41,185
Nice try.
190
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,954
Um...
191
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:45,990
Okay, next week I want you to...
192
00:08:45,992 --> 00:08:48,159
Oh, hell, you know the drill,
don't you?
193
00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:49,293
Yeah.
Yeah.
194
00:08:51,163 --> 00:08:53,397
Are you okay?
You don't look so good.
195
00:08:54,233 --> 00:08:56,234
No, I'm fine. Thank you.
196
00:08:56,236 --> 00:08:57,535
Are you smoking again?
197
00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:58,636
Oh!
198
00:09:00,572 --> 00:09:05,276
Yeah, I'm-- I'm, uh--
I'm trying to quit. It's just...
199
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:06,911
Hey, do me a favor, will you?
200
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:08,679
Please, don't--
Don't tell Margaret.
201
00:09:10,882 --> 00:09:13,451
Oh, yeah. All right, what--?
What are we talking?
202
00:09:13,453 --> 00:09:15,353
Candy or cash?
203
00:09:52,524 --> 00:09:54,926
Hey, foreign guy!
204
00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:57,161
Do we have to go
through this every night?
205
00:09:57,163 --> 00:10:00,464
Just finish killing your cat
and go to sleep!
206
00:10:02,334 --> 00:10:05,269
Turn it off,
or I call Immigration!
207
00:10:27,125 --> 00:10:30,628
Dr. Kagan, please.
208
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,364
"Whom may I say is calling?"
209
00:10:33,366 --> 00:10:35,199
Hey, just drop
the Harvard attitude
210
00:10:35,201 --> 00:10:36,967
and tell him
it's an old friend.
211
00:10:42,374 --> 00:10:44,042
Lee, hey, it's Becker.
212
00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:46,811
Uh, I know it's been
a long time since I--
213
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,779
No, no, don't hang up. Just--
214
00:10:50,248 --> 00:10:52,884
I have no idea
how your ex-wife is.
215
00:10:52,886 --> 00:10:56,521
As of a year ago,
she's my ex-wife too.
216
00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:58,689
Yes, really.
217
00:10:58,691 --> 00:11:02,292
Yeah, well, screw you too,
you Ivy League quack.
218
00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:05,063
Hey, can you do me a favor?
219
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:07,465
Yeah, I've got
a kind of tricky case here.
220
00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:08,966
Yes, yes, me.
221
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:10,968
I got a--
222
00:11:10,970 --> 00:11:14,638
I got an HIV-positive
7-year-old.
223
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,207
Uh, transfusion.
224
00:11:17,209 --> 00:11:19,710
Yeah, the ice under
this kid's getting pretty thin.
225
00:11:19,712 --> 00:11:22,113
Look, I-- I-I'm afraid
that I maybe missed something.
226
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,949
You know, some new treatment,
some-- Some drug.
227
00:11:24,951 --> 00:11:27,985
M-maybe there's a program
you could, uh, get him into?
228
00:11:27,987 --> 00:11:31,989
Do me a favor, let me just fax--
Fax this chart to you, will you?
229
00:11:31,991 --> 00:11:34,158
Oh, come on, you owe me.
230
00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:38,495
If I hadn't met your wife,
you'd still be married to her.
231
00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:43,533
You're welcome.
232
00:11:45,270 --> 00:11:46,770
Yeah, please. Thank you.
233
00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:49,173
And get-- And get back
to me quick, will ya?
234
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:52,143
I wanna make sure this kid
gets to his next birthday.
235
00:11:52,145 --> 00:11:53,210
Yeah.
236
00:12:04,789 --> 00:12:07,258
Hey, man. Spare change?
237
00:12:07,260 --> 00:12:08,959
You mean extra change?
238
00:12:08,961 --> 00:12:12,630
Money that if you weren't here,
I'd just throw away?
239
00:12:12,632 --> 00:12:13,698
Uh...
240
00:12:13,700 --> 00:12:15,967
No, man. Spare change.
241
00:12:15,969 --> 00:12:17,435
Oh, like a spare tire.
242
00:12:17,437 --> 00:12:21,272
For when something goes wrong
with my regular change?
243
00:12:21,274 --> 00:12:23,374
O-oh, no. You're that doctor
244
00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:25,275
from over on Lester Avenue,
aren't you?
245
00:12:26,945 --> 00:12:28,112
Forget it. I don't need this.
246
00:12:30,549 --> 00:12:32,784
Your reputation's growing, John.
247
00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:35,586
These-- These car ads
are such a crock.
248
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,688
You can't even buy
a used car anymore.
249
00:12:37,690 --> 00:12:39,189
They're all "previously owned",
you know.
250
00:12:39,191 --> 00:12:41,692
"Formerly experienced."
"Well-serviced."
251
00:12:41,694 --> 00:12:43,060
If I added the word slut,
252
00:12:43,062 --> 00:12:44,662
you could be talking
about my ex-wife.
253
00:12:46,898 --> 00:12:48,498
You were married?
254
00:12:49,501 --> 00:12:51,803
Yeah. Why?
255
00:12:54,139 --> 00:12:57,341
Who would--?
I mean, why would--?
256
00:12:57,343 --> 00:12:59,410
So, what kind of car
are you looking for?
257
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:02,980
Basic transportation.
258
00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:05,082
Something to get me
from here to there.
259
00:13:05,084 --> 00:13:06,384
Get a bicycle.
260
00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:08,553
Uh-oh.
What?!
261
00:13:08,555 --> 00:13:12,223
They're inexpensive, great
exercise and pollution-free.
262
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:13,524
Oh, yeah.
That's just what I wanna be:
263
00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:15,793
another schmuck
riding down the street
264
00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,194
with a little bell
and a stupid helmet,
265
00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:18,829
trying to save the environment.
266
00:13:18,831 --> 00:13:20,397
Like my little two-wheeler's
267
00:13:20,399 --> 00:13:21,765
gonna make a difference
in a city
268
00:13:21,767 --> 00:13:25,202
with 50 million cabs
belching out toxic smoke.
269
00:13:25,204 --> 00:13:27,872
Oh, little Timmy can't breathe,
but don't worry,
270
00:13:27,874 --> 00:13:29,673
Becker's riding a bike.
271
00:13:32,343 --> 00:13:33,811
I tried to warn you.
272
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,946
I swear, Becker,
if you're not talking medicine,
273
00:13:35,948 --> 00:13:38,115
you're, like, just an idiot.
274
00:13:39,585 --> 00:13:41,485
I think she likes you.
275
00:13:42,921 --> 00:13:44,355
You know,
just 'cause you're blind
276
00:13:44,357 --> 00:13:46,623
doesn't mean you have some
sixth sense about these things.
277
00:13:46,625 --> 00:13:48,159
It just means you're blind.
278
00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:03,440
So, Linda, just curious.
279
00:14:03,442 --> 00:14:05,209
How long have you had
the nipple ring?
280
00:14:06,778 --> 00:14:10,147
Uh, gee, what makes
you think I even do?
281
00:14:14,686 --> 00:14:18,089
See, I-I-I just wondered
what it would look like.
282
00:14:18,091 --> 00:14:19,789
It looks like that.
283
00:14:19,791 --> 00:14:22,026
That machine is not a toy.
284
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:24,294
If you keep
x-raying your breasts,
285
00:14:24,296 --> 00:14:25,529
you're gonna
grow a third one.
286
00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:26,964
Would you like that?
287
00:14:26,966 --> 00:14:29,800
I've got all the trouble
I can handle with these two.
288
00:14:32,470 --> 00:14:33,404
Hello, doctor.
289
00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:34,638
Uh, hello...?
290
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:36,741
Linda.
Right.
291
00:14:36,743 --> 00:14:38,976
Did my, uh, friend from
Harvard Med call back yet?
292
00:14:38,978 --> 00:14:40,544
No, not yet.
293
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:42,346
All right, uh,
get M.J.'s mom on the phone.
294
00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:43,814
See how he's doing,
will you, please?
295
00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:45,349
And then would you, uh--?
296
00:14:45,351 --> 00:14:48,152
Would you mind
draining Mrs. Salazar's boil?
297
00:14:48,154 --> 00:14:50,087
What did I do?
298
00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:51,254
Nothing.
299
00:14:51,256 --> 00:14:52,856
I-I just found a car
I'm interested in,
300
00:14:52,858 --> 00:14:54,358
and I wanna go check it out.
301
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:55,927
Oh, finally.
302
00:14:55,929 --> 00:14:57,361
The only downside
303
00:14:57,363 --> 00:15:00,064
is dealing with
those parasitic car salesmen.
304
00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:02,667
I tell you, if there's one
form of life on this planet--
305
00:15:02,669 --> 00:15:04,368
Don't you start.
306
00:15:04,370 --> 00:15:05,770
If you're trying
to get me to choose
307
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,371
between another one
of your tirades
308
00:15:07,373 --> 00:15:09,339
and Mrs. Salazar's
infected behind,
309
00:15:09,341 --> 00:15:11,108
I'll take the butt.
310
00:15:18,015 --> 00:15:21,986
No, no! No more lies, Phil!
We're over!
311
00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:23,587
You can go straight to hell!
312
00:15:33,665 --> 00:15:37,168
Hi, I'm Beverly Stone.
Can I help you?
313
00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:40,571
Uh, yeah. Hello.
314
00:15:40,573 --> 00:15:43,307
Now let's let that do it
for the pleasantries, shall we?
315
00:15:43,309 --> 00:15:45,609
Now before we get started,
let me say something.
316
00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:48,612
I know all the gimmicks,
all the angles.
317
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,481
There isn't anything
you could say to me
318
00:15:50,483 --> 00:15:52,416
that I haven't heard before.
319
00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:54,351
I've been sleeping
with the manager of this place,
320
00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:55,986
and I just now found out
that he's married.
321
00:15:55,988 --> 00:15:57,354
In order to get even with him,
322
00:15:57,356 --> 00:15:59,089
I'm prepared to give you
a deal on this car
323
00:15:59,091 --> 00:16:00,858
that you won't believe.
324
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:07,430
Well, I haven't heard that one.
325
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:10,968
What do you think?
326
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:13,870
Think I'm an idiot.
Think I'm gonna fall for that?
327
00:16:13,872 --> 00:16:15,672
Sticker says 18-five.
328
00:16:15,674 --> 00:16:18,309
I'll give you 16,
not a penny more.
329
00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:22,079
He told me he loved me.
You can go lower.
330
00:16:24,183 --> 00:16:26,984
You--? You want me to pay less?
331
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:29,119
Yes, I really wanna hurt him.
332
00:16:30,088 --> 00:16:33,758
What do you mean? Like 15-five?
333
00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:36,027
We were talking
about having kids.
334
00:16:36,029 --> 00:16:37,361
Fourteen?
335
00:16:37,363 --> 00:16:39,196
Thirteen. Sold.
336
00:16:39,198 --> 00:16:41,965
No, no, no, wait a second.
Wait a minute.
337
00:16:41,967 --> 00:16:44,101
Just... Let...
338
00:16:44,103 --> 00:16:46,203
I'm not saying yes.
339
00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:51,075
But if I did, would you, uh,
throw in a new set of tires?
340
00:16:51,077 --> 00:16:52,276
Absolutely.
341
00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:54,978
Oh, wait a minute.
342
00:16:54,980 --> 00:16:58,015
All right, all right,
what's wrong with the car?
343
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:58,915
Nothing.
344
00:16:58,917 --> 00:16:59,849
Come on, what is it?
345
00:16:59,851 --> 00:17:01,885
What, is, uh,
the engine block cracked?
346
00:17:01,887 --> 00:17:03,387
There is no engine?
347
00:17:03,389 --> 00:17:05,523
Was it a cab in Mexico City?
348
00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:06,490
Come on, what is it?
349
00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:07,891
There's nothing wrong
with the car!
350
00:17:07,893 --> 00:17:12,096
He broke my heart.
351
00:17:12,098 --> 00:17:12,996
Oh, no, don't--
352
00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,869
Th-- This is not working.
353
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:22,139
Can I talk to
a man salesman, please?
354
00:17:36,454 --> 00:17:38,088
Okay.
355
00:17:38,090 --> 00:17:41,191
I got the latest
lab work in.
356
00:17:41,193 --> 00:17:42,826
And to tell you the truth,
357
00:17:42,828 --> 00:17:46,697
M.J.'s numbers are not quite
as good as I was hoping for.
358
00:17:46,699 --> 00:17:49,800
Maybe they're wrong,
'cause I feel pretty good.
359
00:17:51,303 --> 00:17:54,271
M.J., honey, why don't you--?
I know.
360
00:17:54,273 --> 00:17:56,206
You guys wanna talk about me.
361
00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:58,942
So I'll go out
and talk to that new girl.
362
00:17:58,944 --> 00:18:00,678
She's weird.
363
00:18:02,347 --> 00:18:03,546
I like that in a woman.
364
00:18:05,183 --> 00:18:06,884
Now, M.J., don't be rude.
365
00:18:07,719 --> 00:18:09,920
He's right. She is weird.
366
00:18:12,090 --> 00:18:14,724
Mrs. Johnson,
I have to be honest with you.
367
00:18:14,726 --> 00:18:18,863
M.J. needs better care
than I can give him.
368
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:23,868
He needs a cutting-edge program,
the newest treatments.
369
00:18:23,870 --> 00:18:25,269
We don't have
that kind of money.
370
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:26,637
Nobody does.
371
00:18:26,639 --> 00:18:28,938
That's why hospitals name
buildings after rich people.
372
00:18:28,940 --> 00:18:30,641
Don't worry about it.
There are ways.
373
00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:33,110
But where will I find
a program like that?
374
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:35,145
I already have.
A friend of mine--
375
00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:37,614
Actually, he's, uh--
He's not really a friend.
376
00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:41,051
It's more like
we share custody of an ex-wife.
377
00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:43,921
Anyway, uh,
h-he's recommended
378
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,789
a program
downtown at Mount Sinai,
379
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:47,625
and I really think
that we should give it a try.
380
00:18:47,627 --> 00:18:50,927
Now, I know that you work,
so if you can't take him,
381
00:18:50,929 --> 00:18:53,096
I thought maybe that I--
382
00:18:53,098 --> 00:18:57,300
Well, uh, you know,
maybe somebody from this office
383
00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:58,569
could take him down.
384
00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:00,003
And I promise not, uh...
385
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:02,672
Linda?
Right, Linda.
386
00:19:05,043 --> 00:19:08,345
Jesus blessed us
when he sent M.J. to you.
387
00:19:08,347 --> 00:19:10,347
Yeah. Jesus, right.
388
00:19:10,349 --> 00:19:11,982
Uh, if you're
gonna talk to him,
389
00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:13,717
you might wanna
leave my name out of it.
390
00:19:13,719 --> 00:19:16,453
We don't exactly have
a great working relationship.
391
00:19:16,455 --> 00:19:18,155
You gotta admit
that if he's really
392
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,558
sitting up there,
uh, watching us,
393
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,626
I think he fell asleep
at the wheel, you know?
394
00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:25,829
I mean, how else could you
explain how a disease like this
395
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,931
could slip through
the cracks, let alone--?
396
00:19:33,271 --> 00:19:34,738
Sorry.
397
00:19:34,740 --> 00:19:37,675
Obviously, I have a little work
to do in the faith department,
398
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:41,044
so why don't I just,
uh, say amen and shut up?
399
00:19:42,580 --> 00:19:44,114
Thank you, doctor.
400
00:19:44,116 --> 00:19:47,751
You just may go to heaven
whether you like it or not.
401
00:19:47,753 --> 00:19:49,786
Thanks, that's the first time
402
00:19:49,788 --> 00:19:54,191
anyone's ever suggested
I go in that direction.
403
00:20:09,474 --> 00:20:11,875
Oh, John,
your accountant just called.
404
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:13,577
He said to tell you
that he transferred the money
405
00:20:13,579 --> 00:20:15,579
into your checking account
for the new car.
406
00:20:15,581 --> 00:20:18,281
Uh, you know,
I changed my mind about the car.
407
00:20:18,283 --> 00:20:20,250
Ahem.
I couldn't make a deal.
408
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,720
I knew it was
too good to be true.
409
00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,990
All right, I'll tell him
to transfer the money back.
410
00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:28,625
No, don't do that.
Uh, just keep it in checking.
411
00:20:28,627 --> 00:20:30,794
I've got
some expenses coming up.
412
00:20:30,796 --> 00:20:32,096
What expenses?
413
00:20:32,098 --> 00:20:34,131
Just stuff, okay?
414
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:35,332
Don't worry about it.
415
00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:36,667
Okay, fine.
416
00:20:36,669 --> 00:20:39,470
Oh, I forgot to tell you.
M.J.'s all squared away.
417
00:20:39,472 --> 00:20:41,104
But there seems
to be some mistake.
418
00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:42,439
The hospital said
that they would
419
00:20:42,441 --> 00:20:44,642
contact you
personally for payment.
420
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,809
Is that what--?
Yeah, that's-- That's okay.
421
00:20:46,811 --> 00:20:49,246
Uh, thank you. See you Monday.
422
00:21:01,192 --> 00:21:02,793
Hello, Reg.
423
00:21:02,795 --> 00:21:04,394
I'll have a club sandwich,
424
00:21:04,396 --> 00:21:07,298
French fries
and a cup of coffee.
425
00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:10,534
No, make that a milkshake.
Chocolate.
426
00:21:10,536 --> 00:21:13,771
Do you have any of that pie
left over from yesterday?
427
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:15,873
Oh, hi, Becker. It's you.
428
00:21:20,578 --> 00:21:22,346
I'm not getting my dinner, am I?
429
00:21:23,648 --> 00:21:25,149
I have a date.
430
00:21:25,151 --> 00:21:29,787
Well, this isn't right.
Who goes out on a Friday night?
431
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:32,255
Look, Becker,
he's gonna be here any minute,
432
00:21:32,257 --> 00:21:36,960
and I don't wanna waste the
first two hours explaining you.
433
00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:39,263
Who is this guy?
Wh-what's he do?
434
00:21:39,265 --> 00:21:41,364
Why do you care?
435
00:21:41,366 --> 00:21:42,432
I don't. I--
436
00:21:42,434 --> 00:21:43,934
You know, forget it.
437
00:21:43,936 --> 00:21:47,171
Okay, well, if you must know.
438
00:21:47,173 --> 00:21:48,372
He's a dentist.
439
00:21:48,374 --> 00:21:50,207
A dentist?
440
00:21:50,209 --> 00:21:51,374
You're going out with a guy
441
00:21:51,376 --> 00:21:53,110
who couldn't even
get into medical school?
442
00:21:55,412 --> 00:21:56,747
Good night, Becker.
443
00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:58,148
All right, all right.
444
00:21:58,150 --> 00:22:00,016
I'm not being fair.
445
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:02,418
Uh, you and your dentist
go have a wonderful dinner,
446
00:22:02,420 --> 00:22:06,055
and I'll-- Let me just
grab one of my smokes.
447
00:22:06,057 --> 00:22:10,794
You know, when you came in,
you sounded...different.
448
00:22:10,796 --> 00:22:12,696
Almost, I don't know, happy.
449
00:22:12,698 --> 00:22:14,064
Happy?
Well, for you.
450
00:22:14,066 --> 00:22:15,299
No, no, no, no.
451
00:22:15,301 --> 00:22:18,935
No, just end of the week,
that's all.
452
00:22:18,937 --> 00:22:22,505
Well, have a good time.
Don't forget to floss.
453
00:22:28,879 --> 00:22:31,814
Would it have killed you to say
something about the dress?
38226
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