Original subtitles

During the early days of the Republic, in

Sekai, trying to make himself king,

he resorted to assassination to eliminate

his rivals. He sent out special teams

to do his work, but he hadn't reckoned

with a revolutionary Yu Tsu Hai and his

special monkey style of kung fu.

He proved much too good for him.

You so high! Don't think I'm afraid of

you. You're not getting away.

I'm gonna beat the daylights out of you.

Hacksong!

Hacksong!

Coming! Ah, tong!

Uh, Mr. Heng, I brought you your lunch.

Mmm, that's good. Put it over there,

huhOh.

Hey, you're too slow. You have to be

quicker. Now try again.

ohh

Hey, that's right. Now you watch me.

You can't stop, have

you?Get up! Get up, get up!

Mr. Tech, please stop hitting me.

You hurt me. Leave me alone. Hey, I'm

wanting you. You gotta learn.

You must take it as well, dish it out!

This is Tiger Fist! And

this one's called Tiger Crouching!

Tiger leaping! Tiger

striking! Tiger tracking!

Tiger chilling! Ohh

Now once again, huhOh wow!

Whoa! Mr. Cheng!

Your hand! It's her! Never mind! Never

mind you! Oh my god! Are

you all right?Go to hell! Get up! Huh

Mr. Cheng! Mr. Cheng!

Get away, get away with it! Mr. Cheng,

when are you going to let me practice

kung fu?Well, first,

you must pay three silver bits for a mud.

You know I got no money. That's why I

have to work as a sparring partner. It's

been two years. Every day,

you hit me. All right, all right

Just watch. You lucky?

Oh.

Now, what is this?I know.

That's step. Try to push me then. All

right.

Ohh

ohh How you doing?Can you move me?No, I

can't. Go practice! Two

steps! Ohh One step...

Two steps, three steps. There are

39 steps, but I don't think you can even

learn one. You're hopeless.

Get lost.

Ow! Listen,

you'll have to practice harder, all of

you. You got it?

Yes, boss.

Those 99 steps. You know all of them?

Yes, sir. Good. You can show me them.

Ohh

The fourth step...

The fifth step... The sixth

step... The

seventh step...

The eighth step...

What about the rest?Any more?

HuhSome

more?Yeah.

What is that called?

It's a special stamp. Try this

one! It's called the stamp of fall, you

idiots!One step! Two step! One step!

Hey! Get out of my way! What do

you think you're doing?What are you doing?

Please get your hands off me! You're

crazy! Huh

I wasn't doing anything! You must have

just gone crazy! Why did you pick on me,

huh

I'm beginning to get the hang of this.

One step! Get away from

me! Don't touch me!

One step, two step, one step, two step.

Oh, go. A

more specialized technique.

At least I meet someone and notice it.

This stupid bathroom gave me a hard time.

I did nothing to him. Ah

Turtle kung fu! I'm the turtle! Ohh

So many secret techniques it has to

mean... troubles in store. How

dare you make up with my wife, bastard

Huh That woman, she's your wife.

She's my auntie! Huh

You married your auntie, huhIt doesn't

matter. But you must pay for insulting

her. HuhPay?

But I'm only a humble waiter. I...

I've got the money. You shut up.

If you don't pay, I'll beat you up.

HuhAre you gonna... Are you gonna pay?Huh

Nothing. Hey! Are you gonna pay?Get him!

HuhHe's bleeding, he's bleeding! You see?

Ohh

Get him!

Brush, brush, brush, brush,

brush, brush, brush. Hey, hey, take a

look

at that. Ohh See how clean it is,

huh

Hey, easy, now wait

your time, buddy.

Hey, where shall I begin?

All right.

Ah

Brush, brush, brush, brush, brush.

Well well that's pretty enough for ya.

Yes. One

step, two steps, one step, two steps, one

step, two steps, one step... Hey! What's

the matter with you, you stupid?I'm

sorry, I'm sorry. One

step, two steps, one step... Hey,

he's gone mad. On Saturday. Hold it.

What do you think you're doing?I...

I'm quite single. You better tidy up

first.

Be more careful in

the future.

OhhHey

Mistress, you know

kung fu too. Old man,

I've come here today to get my revenge.

Revenge?I don't

know what's wrong with them. All the time

fighting.

Thanks a lot. Next please. Don't play

dumb. You can't fool me. Why don't we

talk this over, huhCome on!

Hey! So high! I'm

coming!

Huh

Haha!

And

now do you still want to get your revenge?

Ohh Let's

get out of here! Master.

Master. I'll carry it for you. I'll do

everything for you. If in return you

teach me kung fu. Shut your face.

Master, please take me as your student.

I'll do anything you say.

Master!

Hey, where's my tools?Ohh

I'll get them for you.

Hey, watch it, will ya?Ohh

If you want a shake, don't ask me. Ohh

Hey, what are you

doing?You son of a bitch

Don't talk like that to me. Uh-huhAnd

never raise your voice. Uh-huh.. Tell me,

is this Chin Chin Chong?Uh.. yeah. Are

there any fighters here?Huh

One...

What the hell are you doing here?From

here on in, all the fighting gyms are

under my special protection for each

student... I got a cut of that feed.

Who do you think you are?I'm the deadly

snake, Hyun. HuhA snake?

My tiger will eat your snake!

Ohh

Get out

of

here!

Master! Master! Wait

for me! Master! Master! Please wait for

me! Master! Poser master!

Get lost!

Master!

Master!

Now go back. Master!

Master! I'm

coming

too!

Huh

Young man, you really want to learn from

me?

Even if you refuse to teach me, I'm still

going to keep following you until I die.

HuhAll right.

All right I'll teach you. Right through

the sky.

Big and big.

Canada, please...!

Drum, drum, blow!

Get out!

Yeah

Tiger strikes!

That's enough!

Huh

Get 'em!

Come on. Hurry up to the fight!

Huh

The same. You're not much for me.

You call that?That's how I got it! It's a

little pussycat!

Huh

Crane's feet! Crane's feet! Ohh

Crane's feet?Call that a crane?

It's a special kind of crane.

ohh

You fight more like a chickie's beach.

Now what are you doing?He goes .

You know that

too!

My eagle's caught! Eagle?

I'll change you to a ticket! Ohh

Got anything else to show me?

Snake fish! Ohh What

kind of snake is that?A cobra!

A cobra?

Is it poisonous?You better

watch that!

Ohh

Come on, you got any other tricks?No

more, no more. Well, I'm going to teach

you one more. It's a real thing. Yes, yes

You do this. Ohh Follow by

that.

Patton, when are you gonna start giving

me kung fu lessons?What do you mean?

I'll be teaching you now. What's that?You

mean shaving pumpkins is kung fu?Better

cut a pumpkin on a face, my boy. Huh

But I'm not a father. Oh, yes you

are. I started shaving

pumpkins for three years at the start.

Until now I'm the fastest raiser in the

whole of China, boy. Master,

I don't want to be a barber. I just want

to learn gung fu, you know. Learn

how to what?Uh, tiger leaping, tiger

striking, you know, that sort of thing.

But I don't think I know them. Yes, you

do. No, I don't. Yes, you do.

No, I don't. You just don't want to teach

me. Hey, if I don't know it, how can I?

All right. Don't teach me!

Hey, what are you doing there?I'm filling

your toes. Hey, no you don't! Come back

here! Hey, come back!

HuhDon't run in! Stop runnin', will ya?

Come back here! Stop! Stop Hey, stop!Stop

Wait!

ah Hey, you can run faster!

All right. Quick. Faster. Go on.

Faster. One, two,

one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two,

one, two, one, two. Faster, faster, one,

two, one. Faster.

Hey, hey, heyTold you you couldn't get

away from me. Who said that I

wanted to?Now you give it to me.

I refuse.

Then you carry it back for me. Huh

What's that?You can carry it back

yourself. Huh

Hey! Hey Hey Hey Hey

Hey You've got your pole! Come here!

Hey! Come on, come on

Now you give it back to me. All

right, you teach me gunk and I'll give it

to you. I'm not gonna teach a chiseled

bastard like you. Ohh

Well, what now?

I won't do it again. I won't do it again.

Here you are. Ohh

Pull it. Oh, unpull it. Catch

it. Pull.

oh

That's the kind of good boy I want to

learn. How much juice is it going to be

there?Ohh

You're

not going anywhere.

Ohh Enough of this.

Now what tricks will you get up to this?

No more tricks!

What do you call this?Well now,

you won't hit a man when he's down.

Bastard you're hopeless! Ohh

No! Oh,

I

know. Hey, hold it! Hey!

Ohh Hey, now don't

you run! Come back! Hey,

come here! Come back!

I

don't need you yet. What are you shouting

at?Don't you want business?I'm calling

for customers, huh

ohh

I don't give a damn anymore. I'm gonna

teach you a lesson.

Hey, John!Come out here, you bastard

son of a bitchWhere the hell are you?

I'm up here. Come on, come onOkay, you

want it?Oh, come on, you. Get away from

me, you.

Hey.

HuhHuhYou can't escape.

WellWell

Well...

You can't fool me. You won't get away

with this. I'm not a fool, you know. Ohh

ohh

Master.

What's the matter?Did you hurt yourself?

Not really. Oh, you didn't?

You needn't worry. Remember I told you

I was a sparring partner.

I'm used to it. I can

take it, all right. Huh

Sparring partner?

Master, won't you

reconsider?All right. I will

teach you kung fu. Uh, good.

But don't make me shave pumpkins anymore.

Don't worry about it. You won't be

shaving any more pumpkins.

What did you get you?Ohh

I've been busy learning Kung Fu.

I will dock your wages. Ohh Don't dock

anymore. Otherwise, I won't have any

left. In that case, you'll have to

work for free. All right, I'll be your

slave. Who wants you?

Ohh

Come on, come on, eat up. Eat up. Come

on, fellas. Eh,

Mister, he's your wife. Eh,

mister, why not?Don't ask any

questions. Huh My

mistress said you will be nothing.

ohh You

keep quiet, or I'll beat ya! Now get

it out!

Alright, don't get upset. Let's have a

drink. Come on, fellas. That passion I

learned so much. We must think about land

and get rid of him somehow. He's already

got agents under his control. But why is

he coming here?What's so special about

our toy?He must have a purpose. I don't

care why he's coming here. All I know is

that we don't want him to stick around.

We're all gonna have to walk together on

this it wouldn't be. Anyone wanna fight?

Step this way.

Are you?We don't have any crow with you.

So where you making trouble for us?I

think you got a delightful town here. You

understand me?I wanna be the boss of us.

It suits my purpose fine. And once I've

knocked all the opposition down, it'll be

like I'm the king. Huh

But the people don't want you here. Yeah,

I'll only steal from them. You better

leave before it's too late.

I see. You better try to make me that,

haven't you?

You mean, even we're in danger now?That's

right. Our young's coming here,

and he ain't just coming for the good

hospitality.

Oh, dear. Does that mean we have to leave?

No. We'll sneak away now,

but he'll come back.

We have to fight him. Brother, are you

sure we can win?

No man can be sure.

What about that fellow Atung?Hmm

Well, I figure even though he's a fool,

he's born to be a fighter.

However,

I don't want to risk him getting involved

in this. Unless he really has

to. You better practice your kung fu.

Come here. Ah

ohh From here on in,

I'm running this year town. You obey

my orders. Do I make myself clear?Sir!

Yes, sir. How about you?Me?I'd

obey you. I've

now taken over every gym in this town.

There's no one left who dares oppose me.

Starting from today, you'll pay me a

regular protection fee of two silver

ounces. Yes, sir. And anyone who

refuses to pay, gets beaten up.

Leave me alone!

Stop fighting! Will you pay?I'll pay.

Give me!

That's smart of you. Come on.

Have you paid?I don't make any money at

all. Ah, you better pay your fee,

and then you'll have no more trouble.

We'll make sure you're protected.

You better pay up, unless you want to

die. Beat him up!

Ohh

I'm the king of our fighters. Here to

see, justice is done.

Hey! What do you want?I

want nothing. Eh

You're looking for trouble, mister?

No. I don't want trouble.

How do I make trouble?I'm here.

See justice done!

All right. Get him! Hold

it! I have to warm up first

before I start the fight. Let me have

some rock.

Ohh Are you

ready?I am.

ohh What is it now?If

I have to fight punks like you, then it's

took you milliarding. You'd better leave.

Tell your boss to come and see me.

All right, but just you wait. Come on.

Old fella. We meet again.

Master Ha has ordered us to collect

payment.

Hey, if you know what's good for you,

you'll pay him. He's a mean man to cross.

He's in control now. Are you gonna pay?

I won't. HuhYou won't?

huh

My knee, tell Har to come and get it

himself.

What did you say?A simple barber

has the guts to dare stand up against me.

That's... that's his to what he said.

Who does the stupid fool think he is?

That's right. Come on, let's get him.

Umm Richard, do you want a haircut?

Or do you want a shave?I'm gonna

shave you. Shave off your face.

I'm sorry, snake fish just ain't good

enough. ohh We'll see about that. I'll

have to try again.

Hey, you want a haircut or do you want a

shave?

oh

You all right?No need to worry.

I'm still alive.

Brother, I don't know where to find you

now. So even though you scared him off

this time, watch out. Because he'll be

back again for sure.

I'm not scared of him. Just wait for

him. Let him come to me.

Ohh I'm afraid that your courage is all

going to be for nothing. I'm sorry.

But I have to do this by myself.

Didn't you say that even though Atom's a

fool, he's a natural fighter?Yeah, I

think he's born to be one. But you

see... Brother, why don't we train

Atom?We can't let him face Hyun yet.

But if he learns quickly, he can fight

him soon. You must teach him your

technique.

Get out of here! Hey,

hey,

hey What the hell's going on here?This

guy's boss, he's no longer here. Well,

he's disappeared. Let me get my hands on

him. Come on, you

disappeared. That's odd.

He's received his just dessert.

What time about that?Ah,

Maitan! You're always pretending to be so

good. Let's see, how could you kung fu it?

Oh, if I do

show you, you'll only be scared.

Someday I'll force you to show me.

Oh, Mr. Chang! Hey, Art Chung!

Long time no see. Where have you been on

this?I've been out. I've been learning

some kung fu. Now Mr.

Chang's an expert at kung fu. A mighty

fighter. Yes, that I

am. Wu Yan's finished. I'll beat him up.

If he dare shows his face again here--

HuhMr.

Chang, audience disappeared. HmmI said

disappeared?Uh, that's what people told

me. So I guess it must be the truth.

Damn it! He got away!

Mr. Chang, don't be upset. Do you still

want to teach Ah Chung how to fight Kung

Fu?HmmAll

right, but first you go get me something

to eat.

Bastard didn't you say I wouldn't have to

say pumpkin?I didn't say shave. I just

said move 'em. Oh. Come on! Ohh

Hurry up!

The whole way up!

ohh Get lost! Come on.

Hey, you can't leave without paying. What

if I refuse to pay?

All right, let's not have trouble. That's

wrong. If we let him go,

everybody else will refuse to pay. Pay

up! Oh, you bastard

How dare you try to push me around, you

punk. Huh You wanna get

killed?

Come on! Why do you hit me?

Come on!

Ah

I...

I..

You gonna pay now?Yes,

I'll pay. The money?All

right. All

rightHuhMoney!

HuhUh, yeah... Yes...

Manager?Thank you. Thank you. HuhHuh

Why aren't you leaving?But where's my

change?What change?HuhWhat?

No change?Come

on.

Mrs. This will pay for the

damages. No, I'm not.

And I'm gonna learn more kung fu, so that

nobody else will come here trying to make

trouble. Atung, you practice art. You're

a good man.

I've been looking for you. This is

hopeless. I'll never be able to teach you

kung fu. Kung fu?

Do you want to learn Kung Fu?

Master, I only want you to teach me.

So... So that...

My Kung Fu is the best. Ah

Is that true?

If you doubt it, why not try

it?Come on, try me. He'll soon find out.

Oh, all right. Let me test you. Allright.

I only fight when I'm in the mood.

Oh.

Here you're on.

It's a shack. Huh

Faster. Have some more. Go on.

Faster. Eat some more. And drink up. I'll

pay for it. And so,

why are you being so generous to me, huh

Come on, you have some more. Oh, no, no,

for me. I don't drink. Eat the food.

Huh

Good, good, good, good, good

What's the matter, son?A

child! Mistress, mistress,

mistress. Go away. I'll

pay for it. I'll pay, I'll pay.

I'm done. What the hell's going on?Uh..

Huh

Monkey cool. Huh

Now that's a master kung-fu secret.

ANDUNG!

ANDUNG! ANDUNG!

ADUNG! You stupid fool, you smashed my

rice bowl!

Have you seen my book around anywhere?I

haven't.

Now give me that. I've not got

it. Come on, hand it over.

Give it!

Ohh

Come and give it to me. I

don't got it. It's in there. It's

not. Oh, there then.

HuhIn there?

I still don't got it.

Oh, it was my fault.

Master, you've made a big mistake.

Ohh I don't have

it. Give it to me. Give it here, will you?

Unless you're willing to teach me kung

fu. All right, all

rightI'll teach you. I'll teach you.

Don't try to trick me. Have I ever tried

to trick you quick, huhCome on now,

quick! No trick this

time! Master,

you're tricking me again!No, I didn't

trick you. But you're going to have to

learn. Ohh Please spare

me, Master! Well,

make all you want, but it's too late.

You're my student now, boy. Master, I

don't want to learn. I can't stand it

anymore. What did you say?You want to

stop?Master, I don't want

to learn this kind of gung fu. Once

you've read our holy book, you'll become

bound to learn gung fu. You're one of us!

Master! I don't want to learn

it! Ah You're hopeless! Master!

Yeah, the men who learn our Kung Fu must

be upright, and they must be fearless,

dedicated, and strong. You must be

devoted to our country and our

people. I don't like you. You're quick

thinking and smart. I like your

nature. Ask your boss if you can have

a holiday and study with me. Oh,

all right.

And then their hand.

Now I want you to try again.

With the Eagle Car you use your fingers!

Press... Catch...

Grab... Blop!

Do you think you got all that?Mr. Ah

Mr. Chick! Those stars you just showed,

I've seen them used before! Hey! I only

just learned it! It's used to count on

the snake style! Maybe you'd like to try

it now?Uh, not me. Never mind, I'll show

you my eagle claw technique anyway. Now

I'm done. Let's see you try it, huh

Come on now, huh

Mr. Cheng, have a drink.

Mr. Cheng, take it easy. Goodbye.

What are we eating?All right, all right,

take a break! That's not necessary!

Mr. Cheng, our master knows. You've been

learning the eagle's claw. So he's coming

to find out if you can catch a snake. Heh

heh heh. Master, please.

Get up!

Hey,

now my Eagle car.

ohh

Master, fantastic. I have to find out

where that old barber's hiding. HuhWhat,

that old fellow?That young waiter is

always following him about. Let's find

Atung. Atung just left. Just

left?Where's she

going?How should I know?Hmm

Hold it. Come

here.

You should know why I'm looking for you.

HuhAnd you should know I won't tell you a

thing. HuhYou'll talk to me, all

right?

Seems you've loved the monkey style.

Talk! Where is that old fella?

Talk! Talk

Now

speak up.

ohh

Now, will you talk?

I'll talk, I'll talk. Hey, get your leg

off.

Oh,

huhMaster!

Master!

OhhHayun?

He has come back.

He defeated me. I couldn't

escape. He's not so good

for me. Ah

So, he has perfected the Technique-style

kungfu.

Let's go.

And on those.

AhOh. I can't do that.

What's that?Get on there! Master!

Master! It's... It's.. Get up

there!

Ohh

Get up!

ohh

You keep knocking me down. Oh, you stupid

idiot.

I'm stupid, I'm stupid, I'm stupid! I'm

stupid! You idiot!

Ah

Master! Who said you set it up like this?

Master, I... I

did it. Pretty good.

Well, you can pull them out for me. Huh

Pull them out. Master, take a look. How

can I pull them out?I said do it now.

Quickly. But, Master, I can't do it. I'll

pull them. Oh, all right.

Come on. Master, I am pulling

them. Who said to pull like that?Now

get out there. Use one hand to pull.

Master, how can I with one hand?Huh

Ah

Hurry it up! You

know what you have to do now?Quick! Hurry

up!

Quick, quick!

Hurry!

Maxi, what's going on?Is today a special

day?Oh, but today

we're going to celebrate by having a

drink together, huhHere, drink.

Master, I don't drink. Well, I'm now

going to teach you a highly specialized

technique. I'm listening.

All right. It's called

Drunken Monkey.

You left here a long time ago.

No, I've come here for you this time.

For me?Don't play games. If

you know what's good for you, you'll tell

me where I can find our Tung and the old

man. Ah

I love you again. Where can I find Yu

Zhuhai?

If you don't tell me, I'll rip your

dress off bit by bit until you're naked.

What's the

matter with her?Ivan's about to... An

animal! Well, there's gone crazy.

What could have happened to her?

Oh... Oh,

don't... Don't

don't.. Huh

HuhIt's me, Artal! Oh, I beg

you. I beg you! Please don't touch me!

Please don't touch me! Please don't touch

me!!! Mistress!

Mistress.

Chin high what?

Master! Master!

this is between Harriet and myself now.

You stay out of it. I'm Bastard

Bastard Bastard I want you to carry on

practicing kung fu. I don't want you to

get involved.

Bastard 'Cos it concerns me as well.

I can't stay away. I don't want you

here. Now off you go. Go

far away from me and never come back

here. Go!

Master! Go! Master!

Master!

Master! Ayun... You pushed me

too far this time.

Now I'm gonna make you pay for it!

Fine by me, I'll send you...

Mercer!

Mercer! Mercer!

Ah

Young man, they're not bad.

huh

hmm

Are you all right?

Master, I have only

one wish. What is it?

I want me to know what happened.

Ah

Oh my god! No!