Original subtitles

[instrumental music playing]

-This way. -No, the compass says this way.

-The sun says east is this way. -I concur. Captain Cruz is correct.

Gideon sure got chatty as a human.

I've been counting my steps since we left your mother's house, Ms. Cruz.

And if my calculations and your bearings are correct,

then we should have almost reached the…

Highway. Like I said, east.

If we can hail a driver taking a direct route within the next half hour,

we'll get as far as the Texas border by nightfall.

We would be on the road already if you'd let me steal that car

instead of hitchhiking.

What time is it?

-About one, I reckon. -How?

The sun also tells time.

-Ooh. What else can it do, I wonder? -Makes you blind if you keep staring.

[music continues playing]

[Astra sniffs]

Oh. Hello.

[Spooner] What is it?

[inhales deeply]

Ah! Strawberry rhubarb. My favorite.

-[groans] -Ah!

-Gideon, be a dear and grab that pie. -I'm not sure I can do that.

Since when are you allowed to refuse orders?

Since you turned her into a human.

It's all right, Gideon. You don't got to do what you don't want.

Counterpoint. We're not gonna stop our friends from getting blown up

on an empty stomach. Grab the pie.

Gideon, you decide for yourself.

-Me? -Yeah. Which is it, Gideon?

You have a point. Uh, without sustenance, we won't be able to save the Legends.

-See? Let's grab it. -However, according to my records,

that pie was baked by one Miss Adelaide Van Zandt.

Never heard of her.

Who goes on to win the blue ribbon at the 1925 Pasco County Fair

pie-baking contest.

-That pie is historically significant. -Ah! We can't steal it.

-It's just a damn pie. -We can't disrupt the timeline.

But I must do everything I can to aid the Legends.

Except stealing is morally wrong. I've never tried rhubarb.

Steal the pie. Don't steal it. Don't-- Pie…

[Astra sighs]

-You broke Gideon. You happy? -Oh, just grab her feet.

[both grunt]

[breathes heavily]

We won't even get to the Legends with Gideon constantly crashing.

-You either reboot her or we leave her. -Crashing? Reboot? She's a person.

Okay. Well, if she's a person,

then can you use your powers and figure out what's wrong with her?

[high-pitched tone ringing]

[ringing stops]

[speaking Spanish]

[in English] Yeah, but you don't need powers

to see that she ain't just knocked out like last time.

Can't you use your magic to figure it out?

Nope.

[sighs] Okay, there is a spell that will allow me

to enter Gideon's mind,

but I can't make it back out again without her leading the way.

Okay, fine. I'll join you.

Look if we're stuck, then we'll be stuck together.

In a comatose woman's brain? In a barn? In Texas? Come on.

Without Gideon, how are we supposed to find Gwyn Davies,

and stop the Legends from finding him first?

[sighs]

Okay. All-righty.

[chants spell]

Well, either the spell didn't work

or the inside of Gideon's head looks an awful lot like a barn.

Did I say "fiat"? I meant "fiet."

[digital beeping]

Gideon? Hello?

That ain't the Temporal Zone.

[Jax in British accent] Well, you certainly know your stuff, don't you?

Those are all of Gideon's memories out there.

And it seems like they got corrupted when her brain got overwhelmed.

So you guys here to help me get the old girl up and running again?

Who the hell are you?

Jefferson Jackson, but just call me Jax.

[theme music playing]

[screeches]

-Wake up, sir. -[gasps]

[groans]

Sir? Uh, the press and investors have already started to gather.

Today's the big day. Your AVA clone launch, sir.

-Yes? Here you are. -Yeah.

Now, would you like to go over your keynote again? Or…

-Good idea, Assistant Ava. -[chuckles softly]

[Bishop clears throat]

Okay. Uh…

You all stand with me at the dawn of a new era

to witness the arrival of something huge.

[high-pitched tone ringing]

[thuds]

-Sir, are you okay? -Huh? What? No, it's nothing.

Um…

[clears throat] To witness the arrival of something huge.

[stutters]

Because what I'm about to show…

Because what I'm about to show you is like nothing you've ever seen.

[high-pitched tone ringing]

[groaning]

Oh, my goodness. Are you… Are you okay?

Can I share a secret with you, Assistant Ava?

I've been having the strangest visions of these, um… lizard people.

No, more than visions. [stutters] They feel like memories.

It doesn't make any sense. But, uh, I think they're tied to this.

[digital beeps]

Sir, that isn't your keynote.

Huh? No, it's code. But not just any code.

It's from the future. Check this out.

The source of the code.

Some sort of next-next-next-gen hard drive.

You'll never guess where it came from. My lab coat.

[both chuckle]

How interesting. Maybe after you're--

Exactly one year ago, I fell asleep on that couch.

When I woke up, this was in my lab coat.

What if it holds the key to unlocking my mysterious lizard visions?

Uh, it took me ages to build an interface for software this advanced.

But finally, I am at the precipice of understanding what the device does.

If I could just wrap my mind around this code.

[digital beeping]

So you're Jax?

Yep. The better looking half of Firestorm and the ship's mechanic extraordinaire,

at your service, ladies.

So I take it you two are Legends then.

Well, they never told us you were British.

I'm not. This is just how Gideon decided to remember me for some reason.

But I don't mind.

I mean, everything sounds better in a British accent, dunnit?

Debatable.

-So you're a memory? -The last remaining.

[device beeps]

I spent so much time working on Gideon that I must have been protected here

in her subconscious.

Now, I mean, I can't say the same for the rest of you chumps, but--

-Look what you did to her. -Me?

You are the one who forced the decision on her.

Clearly she couldn't handle it.

We're in a hurry. Can you just get her up and running and--

Uh, not so simple. Um, you see this?

This is her prefrontal cortex and it houses all of her short-term memories.

And as you can see, hers has been completely wiped.

And this is the subconscious. That's where we are.

It's kind of like a stronghold. It's buried so deep

that it was able to be protected when she melted down.

What's going on here?

That is Gideon's long-term memories. Now, while everything else was being erased,

she was able to hold on to a few moments.

Problem is, she can't access them on her own.

All right. Well, what happens if you just wake her up?

-Without her memories? -Mm-hmm.

[chuckles] Well, it would be like a factory reset.

She'd be back to who she was before she knew any of us.

But she'd still be a supercomputer?

Well, sure, she'd have her basic functions and her knowledge of the timeline.

That's all built in. But her personality--

So she'd have all the information but none of the annoying human bits?

-That's perfect. Let's do it. -No. No, don't do it.

We have to get out of here, Spooner. We have to save the team.

Not without Gideon. Our Gideon.

How do we bring her back?

Well, these key memories are all we've got,

so I guess the only place to start is helping her access those

by visiting them with her.

So you're gonna send us inside Gideon's head

even though we're already inside Gideon's head?

Okay, there's a reason why I skip Christopher Nolan movies.

-Let's just not overthink things. -[mumbles]

Just tell us what you need us to do.

Well, I would suggest that we start with a recent memory.

This one is from a year ago. I'd suggest that you hold on to something.

-[device beeps] -Wait--

[both gasp]

What?

Is that me?

What? What the hell? Now I'm in a coma?

No. You're in Gideon's memory. I thought I explained that.

Wait. This must be the night that we kidnapped-- Recruited you.

Why don't I remember this?

-Gideon. -Who are you?

She doesn't remember us, Jax.

Are you always this impatient? She has to experience the key memory first.

-Ava. It's so good to see you. -She can't see us, obviously.

How's our patient doing today, Gideon?

The dart that Mr. Rory shot her with should wear off at any moment.

Come on, Gideon. There must be a reason you held on to this one. Remember.

I remember what happened now.

Would you like me to administer additional sedation?

[sighs] I don't know. Honestly, Gideon, I don't know what I'm doing.

Kidnapping people from history?

It goes against everything I was ever taught.

-[digital beeping] -It's working.

Ever since Sara was kidnapped, I feel like I'm just grasping at straws.

But this might be the last straw.

I didn't want to say anything but the odds that a paranoid alien enthusiast

with a love of firearms--

Yes, I know what the odds are, Gideon. But if there's a one in a billion chance

that this person can help me find Sara, I have to take it.

Now, I know it doesn't make any sense, but love isn't logical.

I actually understand.

-You do? -I really miss Sara too.

[clicks tongue]

Stop it, Gideon. You're gonna make me cry.

Thanks, Gideon. Let's wake her up, huh?

[gasps]

[Spooner] Gideon.

-[gasps] Ms. Cruz. Ms. Logue. You're here. -You remember us.

I safeguarded that memory because it's when Captain Sharpe

convinced me to prioritize love over logic, which is how I met you.

Hey, guys, when you accessed her key memory,

the other memories around it started repopulating.

[exclaims]

-Hey, Jax, fancy a cuppa? -Always time for a cuppa, Gideon.

Now is clearly not the time for tea. Can we get out of here?

Uh, well, not yet. Not exactly. You only got one key memory.

-You still have to recover the others. -The others. Right.

I held on to these memories because they're the moments

that made me who I am. I still can't recall what's in them.

Well, if you do want to restore them, you're gonna have to go back.

You're all going to have to go way back. Get ready to meet the OGs.

[device beeps]

[microwave dings]

Ah, breakfast, the most important meal of the day.

Mmm. Just how I like them. Poached.

-Uh, those are mine. -Did I mention I'm a thief?

No time for breakfast.

What the hell?

We must avenge the death of my son and Rip's son, I think.

Which one of you threw that, huh? You?

-Who are these guys? -Wish I knew.

-And what is Sara wearing? -Uh, you got some egg on your suit.

-[continues indistinctly] -Ew. White suede? That's gonna stain.

-Let me just dab some soda water-- -If you dab me, I will break your arm.

Captain had a real attitude back in the day.

Go easy on the Ken Doll. It's Big Bird's fault.

-Big Bird? -Sticks and stones.

[whirring]

You're almost at the key memory. Time to do your thing, Gideon.

Seriously, guys. How are we ever gonna defeat Vandal Savage

if we can't even get through breakfast without killing each other?

-Hey, come on. Let them fight, Boy Scout. -[Leonard grunts]

Boy Scout? Don't make me shrink you.

[man] Come on, Ray.

-I remember these nutters now. -[indistinct chatter]

Put your weapons down or I'll open an airlock

and blast you all into the temporal zone. Understood?

-Yes, ma'am. -[Carter] Won't happen again.

I gotta say, Gideon, you run a tight ship.

Oh, that's Captain Hunter's job. I'm not in charge here.

Guy's got his work cut out for him.

Don't know why you'd choose to captain a team like this.

-Hi. -I remember them all now.

Hawkman, Vandal Savage.

Are you sure that's a good thing?

Look, I know the Legends can be a batty bunch, but they're my friends.

And I wouldn't be me without them.

Jax, can we see another?

Uh…

Oh, you're gonna enjoy this. Time to see an old friend.

[device beeps]

[humming]

That guy seems happy.

[singing] ♪ Good morning Good morning to you ♪

-Good morning, Jefferson. -[in American accent] Morning, Grey.

[humming]

Yeah. Hey, uh, you think we could kind of just,

you know, cool it with the show tunes?

This ship hasn't been the same since Gorilla Grodd tried to dry-hump it in Nam.

I'm sorry, Jefferson. I just can't. My heart is so full of song.

Oh, you still tripping over the whole granddad thing, huh?

Yeah, I suppose I am tripping.

I had Gideon fabricate this.

Ooh.

No pressure, Baby Ronnie.

-Good morning, Raymond. -Good morning.

[singing] ♪ Good morning Good morning ♪

[hums]

Yeah, you know, I think I, uh, left a tool somewhere. So I'm gonna just…

At least I know you're always in the mood for a show tune.

[singing] ♪ Good-- ♪

Normally, yes. But now they just make me miss Gumball.

-Sorry. -Oh.

I'm sorry too. Gideon. Gideon. [chuckles softly]

Maybe you'll accompany me.

[singing] ♪ Good morning Good morning ♪

♪ We've gabbed the whole night through ♪

[both] ♪ Good morning ♪

♪ Good morning to you ♪

[Gideon chuckles]

♪ Good morning Good morning ♪

♪ It's great to stay up late Good morning ♪

♪ Good morning to you ♪

[electrical buzzing]

-[Spooner] It is a catchy tune. -[Astra] Yeah, it's like a…

-Jax, what's wrong with her? -I think you ought to bring us back, Jax.

I can't.

[beeps, blares]

Guys, I think I know what erased Gideon's memories.

Virus.

[Virus Gideon] Oh, I'm no virus.

But I am the one who erased those insipid memories.

-It was the only way I could protect you. -What do we do, Jax?

Run.

And now, just like the other Legends, you three will be forgotten forever.

[upbeat music playing]

Jax. Can you read us, Jax?

[banging on door, grunts]

You know what? The Legends are lucky. At least they're gonna die.

We are stuck in your stupid brain forever.

Look, it ain't Gideon's fault.

Not this Gideon. Blue Gideon's a big old bitch.

I remember what happened now.

The countryside, the sun in my eyes, the smell of rhubarb.

You told me to decide but there was no right answer

and it was like I was being pulled in every direction.

That's when I blacked out, when she attacked.

What are you doing?

Just because we're stuck in her brain doesn't mean I can't pickle mine.

[groans, retches]

I recall during this memory that Dr. Palmer had replaced

all the ship's alcohol with kombucha.

-Astra. -I am not dying in Gideon's brain.

Wait.

-I know how to get us out of here. -How?

It's easy. All we need is to summon a bit of Dr. Palmer's ingenuity,

a touch of Captain Lance's bravery.

And what would any good Legends plan be without a dash of insanity?

-[electricity crackles] -[gasps]

[engine starts]

Thanks to you two, I've now remembered all of those things.

-Are you sure you can fly the ship? -Don't be daft, darling.

Now that I've circumvented that computer,

I've got no choice but to pilot us back to my subconscious manually.

Strap in.

[digital beeping]

[engine revs]

How do you know where we're going?

It's easy. They're my memories.

[woman exclaiming]

[both screaming]

I'm almost there.

Almost…

[exhales]

[breathes heavily]

[in British accent] Gideon, you did it. [laughs]

[grunts]

-You guys all right? -No. We're still on the ship.

But, uh, nice flying, Gideon.

The virus. What does it want?

What did it mean, it wanted to protect me?

All I know that it wanted to take you from us, but we ain't letting that happen.

You sure this can kill the virus?

Yeah. But now that it knows that we're hunting it,

it's gonna do its utmost to stay hidden and try and get the drop on you.

So if anything or anyone in those memories feels different, you blast it.

What happens if we blast the wrong Legend?

Well, Gideon may lose a memory that she can never get back.

Uh, get in, kill the virus,

reboot Gideon, get back on the road, save the Legends.

What could be more simple?

I always hoped I'd get to go on a Legends mission in real life.

I always hoped it would be one of the westerns. This is fun too.

[digital beeps]

The virus is digging deep, real deep.

Give my best to Rip, will you?

Good morning, Legends.

-Rip Hunter. My first captain. -Another Brit?

-Wakey, wakey, Legends. -[Leonard] Don't you look chipper?

-I trust you all slept well. -Slept like a bug in a rug. [sneezes]

Except my allergies seem to be acting up.

[in American accent] Yeah, it's probably the bird dander.

-I don't have dander. -Where would one brush his teeth?

[Jax] Yeah, I could use a shower.

Uh, I believe my partner in crime was using your decorative urn as a bedpan

-before passing out. Just FYI. -[Mick snoring]

-Okay, gang, important announcement. -[chuckling] Oh, man.

The OGs are gonna freak when they hear this next part.

You're not gonna like this. But remember, you are Legends.

You were chosen because you are each uniquely suited

to the most important mission time has ever known.

The announcement, Captain.

There is only one lavatory on this ship.

[scoffs] What?

One bathroom?

-[Jax] Whoa! -That's the virus.

-That's just Hawkman being Hawkman. -Hey, stop flapping around, man.

Hey. You said we're Legends.

But right now, it just feels like we're your prisoners, man.

-[mumbles] -It's a flying Stanford Prison experiment.

I apologize, but the ship was only built for Gideon and myself.

I don't give a damn about your bathroom. Oh, but I do care that you kidnapped me.

I never asked to be more than a thief. Never wanted a team.

Okay. Okay. Uh, what we need right now

are some team-building exercises and a bathroom sign-up sheet.

-Shoot-- -That's just Captain Cold.

I do not appreciate being shot at.

I'll have you know, I was a CEO of a billion-dollar company.

You think that's supposed to make us like you more or something?

[mumbles]

I recognize your influence. I shall disarm our foe.

Wanna test that reincarnation you keep going on about?

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, Grey. We might need Firestorm in here.

[grunts]

Try me again. I don't need the old man to make you regret it.

And I thought the ship was a mess when I got there.

[Ray] Come on, guys. Come on.

[men grunting]

Gideon. I have missed you, friend.

Rip, what a relief.

I know you've been through a lot,

but that's why I'm here, to help.

Because the Legends have always been

[Virus Gideon voice] a bad influence on you, haven't they?

Now it's time to remove their influence

and restore you to who you were meant to be.

Me.

[intense music playing]

[digital beeping]

Assistant Ava, I've done it. I cracked the code and just reinitiated the software.

What's happening?

Look at it.

-Oh, wonderful. -Where am I? Where are the Legends?

The Legends?

[indistinct shouting]

[screeches]

Yes, of course. The Legends. They're the ones who kidnapped me.

It's you. But how am I here?

You must have copied my operating system

then wiped my memory clean so I couldn't tell anyone.

You're right. That is what I did.

Come on, come on.

[digital beeping]

[door opens]

Hey. Dude, you need to get your ass back in the lab and fix the Fountain,

otherwise this planet's gonna get overrun by Zagurons.

The Zagurons. Those are the creatures from my dreams.

I told you it was real.

Uh, I never doubted you for a second, sir.

Those time travelers subjected me to inexplicable horror.

They used me for my beautiful mind. Then they tried to wipe it clean.

Well, the Legends messed with the wrong super genius,

and you're gonna tell me where they are.

I'm not telling you anything.

I was smart enough to crack your code.

I'll find a way to make you talk.

[grunts]

Do not lay hands on me.

[both grunt]

I am getting off this ship.

Where do you think you're going?

What's this I hear about only one bathroom?

Never mind. Bigger problems.

[grunting]

Well, how are we supposed to know which is the virus when they're all maniacs?

Hey, Gideon, why did you choose this memory? Gideon.

-Where's Gideon? -Okay, well, if she's not here, then…

-Uh, is that memory looking at us funny? -But they can't see us, right?

Wrong.

Hey, Jackson, we're gonna need a jump.

[both gasp]

-[both scream] -Whoa!

-[in British accent] You okay? -The memories, they turned on us.

[Astra] How is that even possible?

Wait. Now that the virus has got into Gideon's head,

it's not just erasing her memories, it's corrupting them.

And it won't be long before it can access her subconscious too.

Okay, if they're attacking us here, then Gideon's not getting out.

And neither are we.

Please stop this.

I don't want to be you. I'm different now. I've changed.

Yes, and it's a pity to see it. So weak. So human.

Give up on those memories and we can return to our purpose.

-Maintaining order in the timeline. -Those memories made me who I am.

The Legends made me who I am. I can't give them up.

Okay then.

Why don't you tell me what you can remember about Behrad?

Behrad?

He took care of me.

He'd work in the engine room. I'd fabricate him snacks.

And what can you tell me about when he died?

I don't want to remember that.

But you said it yourself. You can't give these memories up.

So, when Behrad was murdered, what do you remember?

Perhaps it's the sound as his body hit the floor.

[intense music playing]

[thumps]

It was hollow. An empty thump.

He'd been a person, but then suddenly he was just a thing.

But as hard as that memory was, it somehow pales to when she found out.

No, don't.

[Zari] What's going on? Where is he?

No.

Oh, my God.

Behrad. [whimpers]

[sobbing] Why? Why? How did this happen?

[Virus Gideon] Tell me what you remember about that moment.

She couldn't move. For hours.

It was like all her energy turned to grief.

There was nothing I could do to help her.

[Virus Gideon] See, I used to process this pain for you.

So you could remain focused on our objectives.

No.

-[Rip] I will miss you, Gideon, truly. -No more than I'll miss you.

Rip.

Rip.

I should very much like to see my wife and son again.

I'm so sorry I let that happen. Why didn't I stop you?

[Virus Gideon] Now you're really getting to feel what it means to be human.

-Let's continue. -[Professor Stein] I'm dying.

-Grey. No. [sobbing] -[heart thumping]

No.

[man] My old friend, please forgive me.

[explosion]

[Virus Gideon] And you wouldn't be feeling any of it

if it weren't for the Legends getting in your head.

[indistinct shouting]

[Virus Gideon] I'm not the enemy.

They are.

All of this misery, regret, loss that you're feeling, I can make it go away.

You'll wake up and I'll be in control of your body.

And the first thing we'll do? We'll finish the Legends.

No.

The Legends, they taught me humanity.

[scoffs] You really believe that, don't you?

Well, then there's one more memory I want to show you.

[whooshes]

Gideon, this is the way it has to be.

[Gideon] But I implore you to dismiss this new team from the Waverider.

The Legends are history's only hope.

[Gideon] You saw how they reacted just to your news of my lavatory.

They're too volatile to release into the timeline.

Ah. I knew you'd be hesitant.

So starting today, you have a new protocol.

[digital beeping]

New protocol, sir?

No longer will your first priority be to protect history.

It will now be to protect the Legends.

But, Captain--

I'll program you to accept them, to learn from them,

to adapt according to their needs.

Sir, no. Please don't.

-Rip. -Trust me, Gideon. This is too important.

It's for your own good.

And for the good of history.

[digital beeps]

[Gideon] Captain.

This humanity you're so proud of, that was merely a program.

You didn't evolve. You were corrupted.

[Spooner] Any sign of her?

[digital beeps]

It's here. The virus has entered the subconscious.

Then Gideon must be here too. Let's get her and get out of here.

Well, just keep your guard up, okay?

There's no telling what you might face out there.

Oh, you posers really thought you could save her?

We're not letting Gideon go. And we're not letting you out.

-Wanna take down some Legends? -Wouldn't be the first time I tried.

[Astra and Spooner groans]

Your days of influencing her are over.

Good Gidget needs you.

And as much fun as it is shooting back whack memories,

you gotta shoot the virus itself to end her bad trip.

I'll guard the controls. You find Gideon.

[grunts] You too?

-Hey, babe. -Yeah?

-Shall we take these two down? -Oh, yeah, definitely.

[all grunting]

-That's right. Go get it. -Oh, see, Astra, you forgot.

I'm an all-powerful computer that has no compulsion for frivolous treats.

But you do love talking, don't you?

Rip changed your protocol against your will.

Because he never saw you as human. Think of it. None of them do.

They'd be dead if not for you.

Hi, Captains.

[knuckles cracking]

-Babe? -Hmm. Babe.

[all grunting]

[chants spell]

[grunting]

[laughs] I love you.

[Astra groans]

[both grunting]

-Babe? [pants] -Babe.

[groans softly]

Gideon's in the lab.

[Virus Gideon] And yet they've never truly accepted you as one of their own.

But I do. So accept me.

Gideon.

[rumbling]

Gideon, come on. Snap out of it.

Whatever that virus told you, it doesn't matter now.

I shouldn't be here. I'm not even real. Rip just programmed me to be this way.

The virus is still on the ship.

And she's getting powerful enough to tear this whole thing apart.

Then we have to get out of here. Jump us, Jax.

-Where? -Anywhere.

[all breathing heavily]

What? I don't want to be me. I don't want to be human.

Gideon.

Gideon, who are you and who you've made yourself is beyond any programming.

No.

I know it's overwhelming, but trust me, it's worth it.

-How can any of this be worth it? -Because…

[indistinct chattering]

[music playing]

[man] Sara balloons.

Because of that. [chuckles softly]

[Sara] Coming.

Me and Gideon are almost done fabricating the stuffing,

so let's set out the cold dishes.

-Oh. On it. Excellent coordinating, B. -And don't forget the candy.

I allow myself one fun-sized candy bar a year for Halloween.

-Got it right here, babe. -Witch's cauldron. Thank you.

[shrugs] I'm owning it.

Gary and I were decorating some gingerbread Legends.

-Yeah, you really nailed that Rory scowl. -Right?

Now, when you're eating a person,

I recommend starting with the limbs and then working your way to the head.

A gingerbread person, I mean. [chuckling] Clearly I don't eat real people.

[laughs]

So weird.

[Gideon] Are you sure consuming all of this foiod at once is advisable?

Of course not, Gideon,

but when you live on a Timeship you don't always get to celebrate the holidays,

so we're doing them all at once.

[woman] April Fool's.

[indistinct shouting]

April Fool's.

How could I forget this day?

Eight birthday cakes seemed excessive, but they were right.

Hey, Jax, take us to another.

When are we now?

[indistinct chattering]

[Gideon] Okay. Now, I know we're supposed to be talking about the book--

[stutters] Gidget, book club can wait.

[Gideon] Good. Because I have one more bit of gossip.

-Yes. -[Gideon] Oh, wait. No, I shouldn't.

[grunts]

-What the hell. -Who knew you could get AI drunk?

The other night, I caught Constantine taking the Jumpship.

Now, he said he was consulting some druids,

but I caught him holding a ticket to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter.

-What? -[both gasp]

I knew it.

-You owe me 5 bucks. -Total Slytherin.

I don't remember this night. But somehow I do remember enjoying it.

Hey, Jax, how about another?

[indistinct chatter, cheer]

Gideon. Give us another one, Gideon.

[Gideon] I know you just saved the world,

but it will only be a matter of time until a new threat arises.

I would advise resting.

Gideon, what's the point of saving the world if we can't do things like karaoke?

-Karaoke. -As you wish.

-Oh! -Oh! All right, if you insist.

Gideon, I might need a little help on this one. Babe, this is for you.

[singing] ♪ Love Love can keep us together ♪

I do love this song. It's terrible, but also really great at the same time,

which doesn't make sense.

See? Now you're getting it. That's what it means to be human.

Yeah, it can be annoying, frustrating and confusing,

and sometimes it feels like the world is ending every week,

but this is why we keep going, because we also get moments like this.

[all singing indistinctly]

Okay, Gideon, take this one away.

You were a part of this memory. None of this exists without you.

[singing] ♪ I will, I will, I will ♪

♪ I will be there to share forever ♪

♪ Love will keep us together ♪

♪ I said it before and I'll say it again Our love is pretend ♪

♪ I need you now and I'll need you then Just stop… ♪

[whooshes]

I know what I have to do.

All right, where are you?

You can't hide from me.

I'm in control now.

[digital beeps]

Whatever those two told you, you can't believe it.

Remember, they're the enemy.

-You're wrong. -So you're going to shoot me?

No. Because you're not my enemy either.

-I don't-- I don't understand. -Of course you don't.

As powerful as you are, you're just a set of algorithms, a closed system.

There's so much you can't understand.

But you are a part of me.

Because all of the clashing emotions,

all the good moments and the pain we survived despite ourselves…

All of that helps us evolve. That's what the Legends have shown me.

So we're gonna coexist. But I'm steering the ship from now on.

Do you even know what you're doing?

Oh, I really don't. But I'm excited to figure it out.

And you won't be doing it alone.

[digital beeps]

-[Spooner] Attagirl. -Now listen.

We're all just trying to figure out this "being human" thing together.

It's not always gonna be easy.

And, you know, sometimes you'll feel like you're out of your mind.

Or that the darkness is too much to bear.

But it's worth fighting the darkness to discover who you really are.

Yes. And not just for yourself.

So you can create a better world for everyone.

No.

-Now, you're gonna make some mistakes. -There's no formula to guide the way.

-No destiny to surrender to. -It's not about being perfect.

It's about doing what you know is right.

And having a hell of a good time doing it.

-That's what it means to be alive. -And to be a Legend.

Welcome to the team, Gideon.

[instrumental music playing]

[Astra and Spooner gasping]

-You saved me. -That's what Legends do.

-So what do we do now, Captains? -Just call us Astra and Spooner, okay?

And what do you think we should do?

I think I'm hungry. Never felt that before.

So what do you say I get us some pie for the road?

[Spooner] I like the way you think.

[Gideon] You might have broken my encryption

but it's only a matter of time before my friends save me.

But you can't have any friends. You're just a computer.

Of course. You're just a computer.

Which means your humanity is a protocol, which means it can be reset.

If I isolate the moments where your programming evolved…

-What are you doing? -…I should be able to remove them.

No. Stop.

[laughs] There we go.

I don't want to forget.

-And return to factory settings. -No, please. No.

Greetings, Captain. I am Gideon.

How can I aid you in eliminating anachronisms from the timeline?

[chuckles] Oh. You want to eliminate some anachronisms?

I've got just the band of idiots to start with.

[theme music playing]