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1
00:00:01,914 --> 00:00:03,481
[wolves howling]
2
00:00:03,525 --> 00:00:05,353
Oh, my God.
I can't watch this.
3
00:00:05,396 --> 00:00:07,137
Just tell me what's going on.
4
00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:09,183
[door creaking]
5
00:00:13,839 --> 00:00:15,885
Jake!Screw you, H&R Block!
6
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,411
Babe, you are
falling asleep again.
7
00:00:20,455 --> 00:00:21,586
Why don't we just go upstairs?
8
00:00:21,630 --> 00:00:23,501
No. No way.
Claire... [sighs]
9
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:25,547
...we are living with a
world-famous pop star.
10
00:00:25,590 --> 00:00:29,029
We cannot let him see us
go to sleep at... 9:25.
11
00:00:30,813 --> 00:00:32,075
Well, it can't be worse
than the time
12
00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:34,425
that he saw us high-five
over a coupon.
13
00:00:36,993 --> 00:00:39,996
Okay, uh, we clearly have
no choice here but...
14
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:42,564
to get super into cocaine.
15
00:00:42,607 --> 00:00:45,088
This, coming from the guy
who legitimately thought
16
00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:47,786
he was becoming a chocoholic?
17
00:00:47,830 --> 00:00:50,398
You have no idea what I
almost did for a Snickers.
18
00:00:50,441 --> 00:00:52,313
You know what?
19
00:00:52,356 --> 00:00:53,705
This is our house,
all right?
20
00:00:53,749 --> 00:00:56,056
We get to decide when
it's time to go to bed.
21
00:00:56,099 --> 00:00:59,015
And it's time to go
to bed right now.Thank you.
22
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:01,539
I'm sick of this, man,
tiptoeing around here.
23
00:01:01,583 --> 00:01:02,975
We going to sleep,
all right?
24
00:01:03,019 --> 00:01:04,890
Hi guys.Oh, hey, hey,
what you doing
25
00:01:04,934 --> 00:01:07,067
turning off the lights, girl?
We're staying up all night.
26
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,765
What's wrong with you?
27
00:01:09,808 --> 00:01:11,332
What's up, man?
28
00:01:11,375 --> 00:01:14,074
Not much. My stuff's getting
delivered to the house tomorrow,
29
00:01:14,117 --> 00:01:15,292
so I thought
I'd head to bed early.
30
00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:17,164
Oh. God. Thank God.
31
00:01:17,207 --> 00:01:18,426
[laughs][whoops]
32
00:01:18,469 --> 00:01:20,080
Okay, we are also
going to bed,
33
00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:21,733
but we didn't want to say
anything, 'cause we were
34
00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:23,431
afraid you'd think
we're losers.Yeah.
35
00:01:23,474 --> 00:01:25,128
No way. Bed is awesome.
36
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:28,000
In fact, we should all
head up there together.
37
00:01:29,045 --> 00:01:31,830
Well... [laughs]
No, no.
38
00:01:31,874 --> 00:01:33,049
No. We...
39
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,138
No. Right? No.
40
00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:37,923
Ah, uh, Coops,
we're very flattered,
41
00:01:37,967 --> 00:01:40,143
and we wish we could say
that was the first time
42
00:01:40,187 --> 00:01:41,579
someone asked us
to sleep with them...
43
00:01:41,623 --> 00:01:44,626
Yeah, we misread
a Craigslist ad.Yeah.
44
00:01:44,669 --> 00:01:46,454
But, as handsome
45
00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:49,892
as we both find you,
that's just not on the table.
46
00:01:49,935 --> 00:01:53,025
[laughs]
Not gonna share my Claire.
47
00:01:53,069 --> 00:01:55,419
Are we talking
about Bed, the nightclub?
48
00:01:55,463 --> 00:01:58,118
Oh. No, no, no, no, no, no.No.
49
00:01:58,161 --> 00:02:00,337
Okay. Well,
have a great sleep, guys.
50
00:02:00,381 --> 00:02:01,991
Hey, just because
we're going to bed doesn't mean
51
00:02:02,034 --> 00:02:03,253
we're going to sleep.
52
00:02:03,297 --> 00:02:05,125
We about to do it.
[chuckles]
53
00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:08,084
[both mouthing]
54
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:11,131
Going right to sleep.
[laughs]
55
00:02:11,174 --> 00:02:13,350
Come on, honey.
Come on, come on.
56
00:02:13,394 --> 00:02:14,525
♪
57
00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:17,920
♪ Imagine me and you, I do
58
00:02:17,963 --> 00:02:20,792
♪ I think about you
day and night ♪
59
00:02:20,836 --> 00:02:22,272
♪ It's only right [fans clamoring]
60
00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:25,014
♪ So happy together
61
00:02:25,057 --> 00:02:27,277
[vocalizing]
62
00:02:33,370 --> 00:02:36,330
Claire-bear, check it out.
63
00:02:36,373 --> 00:02:38,636
I got a dolly to help us
move Cooper's stuff.
64
00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,203
Oh, great.[door closes]
65
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:41,291
Ooh, you think
he's gonna have one
66
00:02:41,335 --> 00:02:44,033
of those super fancy
giant TVs?
67
00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:47,167
Like, a 200-inch
IMAX one with GPS,
68
00:02:47,210 --> 00:02:50,605
all-wheel drive
and cup holders?
69
00:02:51,823 --> 00:02:53,608
You don't know much
about TVs, do you?
70
00:02:53,651 --> 00:02:56,045
I do not.
71
00:02:56,088 --> 00:02:58,221
[doorbell rings]Uh-oh.
72
00:02:58,265 --> 00:03:00,136
Oh. Hey.Ah.
73
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,224
Ooh. Hi.
74
00:03:01,268 --> 00:03:02,747
Hi. I have a delivery
for a Mr. James?
75
00:03:02,791 --> 00:03:03,879
Yeah.Oh, yeah, awesome.
76
00:03:03,922 --> 00:03:06,011
Uh, electronics
can go over here, right?
77
00:03:06,055 --> 00:03:07,578
Uh, clothes can go upstairs,
78
00:03:07,622 --> 00:03:10,146
and, uh, any exotic animals
can just chill in the backyard.
79
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,713
I put out bowls of water.
80
00:03:12,801 --> 00:03:14,890
Have a nice day.
81
00:03:14,933 --> 00:03:16,326
But wait.
Isn't there more?
82
00:03:16,370 --> 00:03:17,458
Nope.
83
00:03:19,155 --> 00:03:20,896
Huh.
84
00:03:20,939 --> 00:03:23,159
Okay.Oh, here we go.
85
00:03:25,292 --> 00:03:27,250
That'll do it.
86
00:03:39,349 --> 00:03:41,395
Hey, that works, too.
87
00:03:41,438 --> 00:03:43,875
[knocking]Coop 'a noodles,
what's up?
88
00:03:43,919 --> 00:03:45,877
Hey.Got your stuff.
89
00:03:45,921 --> 00:03:47,444
Aw, sick.
90
00:03:47,488 --> 00:03:50,186
Yeah. Uh, is this one box
seriously everything you own?
91
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,275
Yeah, man, what happened
to all your other stuff?
92
00:03:52,319 --> 00:03:54,451
You know, your Grammys,
your Rolling Stonearticles,
93
00:03:54,495 --> 00:03:58,107
that wax sculpture that made
you look like Angela Lansbury?
94
00:03:58,150 --> 00:03:59,674
Yeah, I got rid of all that.
95
00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:02,198
Now the only things I take
with me are my guitar and this.
96
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,460
[sniffles]
It's the last photo I took
97
00:04:03,504 --> 00:04:05,157
with my family
before I moved out of home.
98
00:04:05,201 --> 00:04:07,203
Oh, what a cutie.[chuckles]
99
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:10,772
Wow. I've never seen a
ten-year-old with a six pack.
100
00:04:10,815 --> 00:04:13,209
And since I've moved around
so much over the years,
101
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,342
it's always been easier
to be a minimalist.
102
00:04:15,385 --> 00:04:16,995
So you just
throw everything away?
103
00:04:17,039 --> 00:04:19,346
Yeah, I, uh... I scrub it all.
104
00:04:19,389 --> 00:04:20,912
Do you guys know
what I mean by "scrubbing"?
105
00:04:20,956 --> 00:04:24,046
Who me? Yeah,
dude, of course.
106
00:04:24,089 --> 00:04:26,309
I love to scrub.
[chuckles]
107
00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:28,659
Scrub-a-dub-dub.
108
00:04:28,703 --> 00:04:30,008
But, just so Claire
doesn't feel left out,
109
00:04:30,052 --> 00:04:31,967
why don't you bounce
it her way, you know?
110
00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:33,577
So, whenever I move in
to a new place...
111
00:04:33,621 --> 00:04:35,797
Later, old place.I get rid
of all my old stuff.
112
00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:37,538
[high-pitched]:
To the curb, y'all.Yeah, it's best
113
00:04:37,581 --> 00:04:39,061
just to let that stuff go,
'cause
114
00:04:39,104 --> 00:04:40,323
I don't need things from...
115
00:04:40,367 --> 00:04:41,977
BOTH: ...the past to remind me
of who I am.
116
00:04:42,020 --> 00:04:45,720
And that, young lady,
is what scrubbing is.
117
00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:47,809
You see, because
me-- me and Coops--
118
00:04:47,852 --> 00:04:48,984
we get rid of everything,
119
00:04:49,027 --> 00:04:50,768
because the past is
not what defines us.
120
00:04:50,812 --> 00:04:52,248
CLAIRE:
Jake, you are literally
121
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,816
surrounded by boxes
of your old crap.
122
00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:56,600
This? This isn't crap.
123
00:04:56,644 --> 00:04:58,254
This is all the stuff from
my past that defines me.
124
00:04:59,386 --> 00:05:01,257
I am so sorry, Cooper,
that you have been
125
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,824
living up here like this.
I'm sure,
126
00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:05,348
as a minimalist,
being around all this junk
127
00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:06,741
is driving you nuts.
128
00:05:06,784 --> 00:05:08,656
Nah, it's actually refreshing.
129
00:05:08,699 --> 00:05:10,222
People are always
cleaning up after me,
130
00:05:10,266 --> 00:05:12,399
but you guys don't even feel
society's pressure
131
00:05:12,442 --> 00:05:14,488
to clean up after yourselves.[Jake laughs]
132
00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:16,141
Ouch.
133
00:05:16,185 --> 00:05:17,534
You know, we will
have this place scrubbed
134
00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:18,927
by the end of the day.
135
00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:21,321
'Cause, I mean, we do not need
to keep copies
136
00:05:21,364 --> 00:05:23,845
of all the letters that
you wrote to Scottie Pippen.
137
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:25,150
No, no, no,
we need to keep those,
138
00:05:25,194 --> 00:05:26,848
because he literally
wrote back to every one.
139
00:05:26,891 --> 00:05:29,416
[laughs]
Okay. "Dear"--
140
00:05:29,459 --> 00:05:31,635
different font--
"...Jake,
141
00:05:31,679 --> 00:05:34,769
"Thanks for your letter
and/or drawing.
142
00:05:34,812 --> 00:05:36,727
"Keep on trippin' for Pippen.
Signed,
143
00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:39,643
"Pat Lemieux,
attorney for Scottie Pippen.
144
00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:41,950
"P.S.: this letter
does not reflect the views
145
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:43,038
of Scottie Pippen."
146
00:05:43,081 --> 00:05:45,170
Yeah.Come on, Jake, it's dangerous
147
00:05:45,214 --> 00:05:46,737
for him to sleep
up here like this.
148
00:05:46,781 --> 00:05:48,173
Oh, nonsense.
149
00:05:48,217 --> 00:05:51,481
My stuff is organized
and stacked meticulously.
150
00:06:03,232 --> 00:06:06,409
Okay, obviously, I will get rid
of the bowling ball.
151
00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,411
[creaking]
152
00:06:12,459 --> 00:06:14,199
[coughs]
153
00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:16,201
So, as I was saying,
154
00:06:16,245 --> 00:06:18,334
I will have this place scrubbed
by the end of the day.
155
00:06:25,994 --> 00:06:27,561
Hey, babe.
How's the scrubbing going?
156
00:06:27,604 --> 00:06:29,171
Oh, great.
157
00:06:29,214 --> 00:06:30,433
I'm realizing
all my stuff is awesome,
158
00:06:30,477 --> 00:06:31,739
and I'm never
getting rid of any of it.
159
00:06:33,305 --> 00:06:35,699
Come on, there's got to be stuff
in here that you don't need.
160
00:06:35,743 --> 00:06:39,137
Okay, Cooper doesn't
keep his real Grammys,
161
00:06:39,181 --> 00:06:42,184
and this is a fake Grammy
that you won
162
00:06:42,227 --> 00:06:45,187
for best karaoke
at your office Christmas Party.
163
00:06:46,754 --> 00:06:48,973
[singsongy]:
Keeping it.
164
00:06:50,279 --> 00:06:51,933
Well, you definitely don't need
165
00:06:51,976 --> 00:06:53,848
this old plastic basketball.
166
00:06:53,891 --> 00:06:57,025
Well, is it just an old
plastic basketball, Claire,
167
00:06:57,068 --> 00:07:00,158
or is it two basket-bowls?
[laughs]
168
00:07:00,202 --> 00:07:02,596
Oh, my God,
there's guacamole...
169
00:07:02,639 --> 00:07:05,381
[gags] There's still
guacamole in this.
170
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,688
[gags]
171
00:07:07,731 --> 00:07:09,341
Knock, knock.
172
00:07:09,385 --> 00:07:10,821
[scoffs]
Mom, you can't say
"knock knock"
173
00:07:10,865 --> 00:07:12,257
when you're already
in the house.
174
00:07:12,301 --> 00:07:13,476
JAKE:
Wow, uh,
175
00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,304
you two are dressed
an awful lot alike.
176
00:07:15,347 --> 00:07:17,001
Yeah, whenever I buy a
shirt for myself online,
177
00:07:17,045 --> 00:07:19,351
I always click on the
men's version as well.
178
00:07:19,395 --> 00:07:21,266
Ah.GERALD:
It's a great system for us,
179
00:07:21,310 --> 00:07:23,530
'cause we have the same style.
180
00:07:23,573 --> 00:07:25,967
Forever 51.
181
00:07:29,405 --> 00:07:32,103
Come on.
You two, this is getting crazy.
182
00:07:32,147 --> 00:07:33,757
You don't just dress alike.
183
00:07:33,801 --> 00:07:36,281
You also split every meal and
you watch all the same shows.
184
00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:38,240
And it is perfectly natural
185
00:07:38,283 --> 00:07:40,285
for a couple to merge
together over time.
186
00:07:40,329 --> 00:07:43,375
You know, just like... like
Daddy's chest and back hair.
187
00:07:46,248 --> 00:07:48,424
It'll happen to you, too.
Before you know it,
188
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,208
Claire and Jake
will cease to exist,
189
00:07:50,252 --> 00:07:51,645
and in its place will be...
190
00:07:51,688 --> 00:07:52,950
...Clake.Clake.
191
00:07:52,994 --> 00:07:54,386
Yes!
[laughs]
192
00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:55,910
Jinx.Jinx.
193
00:07:55,953 --> 00:07:58,303
Love you.Love you.
194
00:07:58,347 --> 00:07:59,696
Booga booga!Booga booga!
195
00:07:59,740 --> 00:08:01,829
[both laughing]
196
00:08:01,872 --> 00:08:04,396
[both sigh]
197
00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:05,789
You know, it
is horrifying
198
00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:07,487
to see the two of them
combined into one person.
199
00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:09,489
Uh, well,
technically, that's me.
200
00:08:13,231 --> 00:08:16,191
But I... I understand
what you mean.
201
00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:18,541
And don't worry.
We are a young, cool couple.
202
00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:22,066
We are nowhere near unisex
shopping at Tommy Bahama.
203
00:08:23,633 --> 00:08:27,028
So are you guys finally getting
rid of all your old junk?
204
00:08:27,071 --> 00:08:28,551
Uh, well,
it's actually just me.
205
00:08:28,595 --> 00:08:29,944
I have trouble
throwing things out.
206
00:08:29,987 --> 00:08:31,380
Doesn't seem to be
a problem with Claire.
207
00:08:31,423 --> 00:08:32,816
[both laughing]
208
00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:34,383
What? What?
What's funny?
209
00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:35,645
What-what are
we laughing at?
210
00:08:35,689 --> 00:08:37,429
Claire holds on to
plenty of stuff.
211
00:08:37,473 --> 00:08:38,866
She just does it
in plain sight.
212
00:08:38,909 --> 00:08:40,868
No, I-I... I do not.
213
00:08:40,911 --> 00:08:42,478
Oh, really?
214
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,872
Do you see that "art"
on the wall?
215
00:08:44,915 --> 00:08:46,830
Yeah, it's a... Claire told me
it was a Banksy print.
216
00:08:46,874 --> 00:08:49,703
Yeah, if Banksy
secretly worked at Kinko's.
217
00:08:51,835 --> 00:08:53,533
That's just a collage
of all of her
218
00:08:53,576 --> 00:08:54,534
old concert tickets.
219
00:08:54,577 --> 00:08:56,623
Wait a minute.
220
00:08:56,666 --> 00:08:58,625
Wait. Claire,
you lied to me,
221
00:08:58,668 --> 00:09:01,105
andyou saw Incubus
this many times?
222
00:09:02,629 --> 00:09:03,847
And what's in here?
223
00:09:03,891 --> 00:09:05,414
That's the, uh,
china Claire said
224
00:09:05,457 --> 00:09:06,720
we're saving for
a special occasion.
225
00:09:06,763 --> 00:09:09,592
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. No.
Okay, Jake, Jake, stop, stop.
226
00:09:09,636 --> 00:09:11,594
Stop. I-I...
227
00:09:11,638 --> 00:09:14,597
I need you to trust me.
228
00:09:14,641 --> 00:09:16,251
Aw, Claire-bear.
229
00:09:16,294 --> 00:09:18,035
That's what the
villain says.
230
00:09:18,079 --> 00:09:20,995
Oh, look what
we have here.
231
00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:23,606
Old, ratty concert
T-shirts, uh,
232
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:25,173
and some mix tapes.
233
00:09:25,216 --> 00:09:27,610
We got... Oh, my gosh.
234
00:09:27,654 --> 00:09:30,657
What in the Bride
of Chucky is this?
235
00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:34,835
It's Rebethany.
236
00:09:37,402 --> 00:09:39,666
That is her terrifying
childhood doll.
237
00:09:39,709 --> 00:09:42,669
Ugh. Rebethany.
238
00:09:42,712 --> 00:09:44,322
[in high-pitched voice]:
No one can love Claire
239
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:47,195
like I love Claire.
240
00:09:47,238 --> 00:09:48,762
[growling]JAKE: Oh, God.
241
00:09:50,111 --> 00:09:52,287
The funny thing is,
we never even bought it.
242
00:09:52,330 --> 00:09:55,072
It just... showed up one day.
243
00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:59,381
Face it-- you both have
a bit of a hoarding problem.
244
00:09:59,424 --> 00:10:00,687
Now, come on, honey.
245
00:10:00,730 --> 00:10:02,602
We have to go
to the bathroom.
246
00:10:06,344 --> 00:10:08,912
Now, that is scarier
than your doll.
247
00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,920
All right, so here's the plan.
248
00:10:16,964 --> 00:10:19,401
If we don't still use it,
we lose it.
249
00:10:19,444 --> 00:10:21,838
If we ain't playin',
it ain't stayin'.
250
00:10:21,882 --> 00:10:25,407
If it has no purpose, then we...
251
00:10:25,450 --> 00:10:27,235
Uh, uh, we, uh...
252
00:10:27,278 --> 00:10:29,498
We just put it
in the throw pile.
253
00:10:29,541 --> 00:10:31,108
We put it in the...Yeah. Okay.
254
00:10:31,152 --> 00:10:32,414
So...
255
00:10:32,457 --> 00:10:35,112
All right, well, this
is a definite throw.
256
00:10:35,156 --> 00:10:37,375
Yoink. That is...
257
00:10:37,419 --> 00:10:38,681
a definite keep, all right?
258
00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:40,814
This is my rec jersey,
all right?
259
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:42,685
What... Oh, you still wear that?
260
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:44,556
I use it as motivation
261
00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:46,210
to get back
to my original weight.
262
00:10:49,518 --> 00:10:50,780
What original weight,
263
00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:54,697
eight pounds, seven ounces?
264
00:10:54,741 --> 00:10:57,091
It's form-fitting,
Claire, all right?
265
00:10:57,134 --> 00:10:59,833
Stop focusing on my sexy jersey
and focus on, uh,
266
00:10:59,876 --> 00:11:02,618
scrubbing this creature
from my nightmares.
267
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:06,100
Hey, hey. I can't
get rid of Rebethany.
268
00:11:06,143 --> 00:11:07,710
Both my parents
always worked late,
269
00:11:07,754 --> 00:11:10,060
and she was the only one who
would listen to music with me.
270
00:11:11,235 --> 00:11:13,063
["London Bridge" playing eerily]Wherever you go,
271
00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:16,284
I'll be there.
272
00:11:16,327 --> 00:11:17,938
I'm starting to understand
273
00:11:17,981 --> 00:11:19,504
why you guys had
so many house fires.
274
00:11:21,550 --> 00:11:24,901
Okay, well, what is this
giant elastic band for,
275
00:11:24,945 --> 00:11:26,947
really big
accounting documents?
276
00:11:26,990 --> 00:11:28,122
Claire, if you must know,
277
00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:31,125
this is my Elasta-blaster
Exercise Band.
278
00:11:31,168 --> 00:11:32,561
Allow me to demonstrate.
279
00:11:32,604 --> 00:11:35,912
I simply put this in the wedge
of the door, right,
280
00:11:35,956 --> 00:11:37,435
close said door,
281
00:11:37,479 --> 00:11:39,655
put it around said body,
282
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:42,310
and, oh,
look at all that resistance.
283
00:11:42,353 --> 00:11:44,007
Huh?
Look at that.
284
00:11:44,051 --> 00:11:45,400
See, back when I played
college ball,
285
00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:47,097
this is how I used to explode
through the lane.
286
00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:48,751
I'd be like... [grunts]
And I'd be like...
287
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:50,013
[grunts]
288
00:11:50,057 --> 00:11:52,407
[grunting]
289
00:11:54,496 --> 00:11:56,280
And it's a great way to practice
being held back in a fight.
290
00:11:56,324 --> 00:11:58,674
Be like, "What?
What you talkin' 'bout? No, no,
291
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:00,328
"no, no, no.
Eliot,
292
00:12:00,371 --> 00:12:02,591
"let me talk to him.
Let me talk to him, Eliot.
293
00:12:02,634 --> 00:12:04,549
"I just want to talk to him.
294
00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:06,073
"Huh? What?
295
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:07,291
I'm-a kill him.
I'm gonna kill him."
296
00:12:07,335 --> 00:12:10,251
[shouts]
297
00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:12,470
Hey, what's up, Coops?
298
00:12:12,514 --> 00:12:14,298
Hey.When did you get here?
299
00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:15,517
What are you guys doing?
300
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:17,475
Uh, we are trying
to scrub our old stuff,
301
00:12:17,519 --> 00:12:19,477
but it's harder than we thought
to let go.
302
00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:20,783
It can be tough.
303
00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:22,785
Maybe the lyrics
from my latest single can help.
304
00:12:22,829 --> 00:12:24,091
Oh, we love that song.Mm.
305
00:12:24,134 --> 00:12:26,571
♪ Don't let the past
306
00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:28,660
♪ Define who you are
307
00:12:28,704 --> 00:12:30,924
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
308
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:33,448
♪ Shake that booty,
yeah, yeah. ♪
309
00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:42,413
You're probably just talking
about that first line, huh?Mm-hmm.
310
00:12:42,457 --> 00:12:44,589
Yeah, I've always thought
that if you hold on to the past
311
00:12:44,633 --> 00:12:46,591
too tight,
you'll never be ready to embrace
312
00:12:46,635 --> 00:12:47,984
who you are in the future.
313
00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:51,118
Well, you are the most
successful person we know.
314
00:12:51,161 --> 00:12:53,120
And maybe we are holding
ourselves back
315
00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:55,122
by hanging on
to all these memories.
316
00:12:55,165 --> 00:12:57,559
Yeah, I guess we could
get rid of some of this stuff.
317
00:12:57,602 --> 00:12:59,735
If it helps, there's an old
Australian proverb that says
318
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,868
if you throw something away
and you're meant to have it,
319
00:13:01,911 --> 00:13:03,565
it'll boomerang back to you.
320
00:13:03,608 --> 00:13:06,394
That's funny. [grunts]
I have a Nerf Boomerang theory:
321
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:08,613
that everything
will end up on the roof.
322
00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:11,399
Well, thanks, Cooper.
323
00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:12,835
[chuckles]
Does it work?
324
00:13:12,879 --> 00:13:15,098
Totally. I once threw this shirt
out at a concert,
325
00:13:15,142 --> 00:13:17,274
and, the very next night,
a beautiful woman came up
326
00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:19,059
to my hotel room
and returned it to me.
327
00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:21,670
She gave me my own shirt
right off her back.
328
00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:23,498
That... Wait a minute.
329
00:13:23,541 --> 00:13:25,500
[chuckles]
330
00:13:25,543 --> 00:13:28,590
What did she wear
in the hotel room?
331
00:13:28,633 --> 00:13:30,418
Oh.
332
00:13:32,115 --> 00:13:34,988
She was topless.Yeah.
333
00:13:35,031 --> 00:13:36,467
She had her b...
334
00:13:36,511 --> 00:13:38,948
Yo.
335
00:13:40,994 --> 00:13:42,647
Claire-bear!
336
00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:43,997
[chuckles]
337
00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,085
I'm back from Goodwill,
338
00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:46,826
and we are officially scrubbed.
339
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,088
CLAIRE:
How'd it go, babe?
340
00:13:48,131 --> 00:13:49,089
Oh, it was fine,
341
00:13:49,132 --> 00:13:50,525
though there was a weird moment
342
00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:52,527
when Rebethany
slid out of her box
343
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:55,399
and got wedged
under my brake pedal.
344
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,490
I think this is
gonna be good for us.
345
00:13:59,534 --> 00:14:02,058
We can't let the past
define who we are.
346
00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:04,147
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah,
shake that booty ♪
347
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:06,671
♪ Yeah, yeah.
348
00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:09,457
It's time to embrace
the future us.
349
00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:11,459
[chuckles]
350
00:14:11,502 --> 00:14:15,419
Oh... my... God.Oh... my... God.
351
00:14:15,463 --> 00:14:16,594
Why are you wearing that?Why are you wearing that?
352
00:14:16,638 --> 00:14:17,900
Oh, my God.Oh, my God.
353
00:14:17,944 --> 00:14:19,510
I got it online.I got it online.
354
00:14:19,554 --> 00:14:21,251
Now we both paid for shipping.Now we both paid for shipping.
355
00:14:21,295 --> 00:14:22,383
Stop doing that.Stop doing that.
356
00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:23,601
Stop doing that!Stop doing that!
357
00:14:23,645 --> 00:14:24,994
[both gasp]
358
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,343
We're Clake.We're Clake.
359
00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:28,171
I'm going to change.I'm going to change.
360
00:14:28,215 --> 00:14:29,259
No, I'mgoing to change.No, I'mgoing to change.
361
00:14:29,303 --> 00:14:30,913
Okay, you go ahead.Okay, you go ahead.
362
00:14:30,957 --> 00:14:32,959
Ugh!Ugh!
363
00:14:41,489 --> 00:14:42,969
I know it's crazy,
but it feels
364
00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:45,145
like the moment we got rid
of all our old stuff,
365
00:14:45,188 --> 00:14:47,103
we merged
into the same person.
366
00:14:47,147 --> 00:14:48,888
This is the best thing
that's ever happened to you.
367
00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:51,238
Just give in to being Clake.
368
00:14:51,281 --> 00:14:54,328
But we don't want to be Clake.But we don't want to be Clake.
369
00:14:54,371 --> 00:14:55,938
Please.
370
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:57,113
Thank you.
371
00:14:57,157 --> 00:14:59,811
But we don't want to be Clake.
372
00:14:59,855 --> 00:15:01,944
I'm really sorry, guys.
373
00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:04,294
If I'd've known the lyrics to
"Shake Your Booty, Yeah, Yeah"
374
00:15:04,338 --> 00:15:07,341
would've caused so much pain,
I never would've written them.
375
00:15:10,387 --> 00:15:12,781
Trust me, guys,
it is so much better this way.
376
00:15:12,824 --> 00:15:15,088
You always know what the other
person is talking about.
377
00:15:15,131 --> 00:15:17,699
For instance, if I say
something vague, like...
378
00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:19,701
"that actress
with the hair,"
379
00:15:19,744 --> 00:15:21,964
Daddy says...Naomi Watts.
380
00:15:22,008 --> 00:15:23,270
Mm-hmm.And if I say
381
00:15:23,313 --> 00:15:24,880
"the place with
the chairs..."
382
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,708
Macaroni Grill.
383
00:15:27,752 --> 00:15:29,189
Okay.
384
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,147
Well, you guys could just be
making this whole thing up.
385
00:15:31,191 --> 00:15:33,193
Oh, really?
386
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:40,809
[clears throat]
387
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:42,637
What's that thing
with the thing?
388
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:45,466
Slightly damaged
golf umbrella.
389
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:00,785
Can I help you?Yeah,
390
00:16:00,829 --> 00:16:02,874
I, um... I made my friends
give all their stuff away,
391
00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:04,964
and I feel like I ruined
their lives.
392
00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:07,053
Um, can I get it back?
393
00:16:07,096 --> 00:16:09,490
Yeah, that sounds like
a you problem, Crocodile Dun...
394
00:16:09,533 --> 00:16:12,014
Oh, my God.
395
00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:15,278
You're Cooper James.Hi.
396
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:17,324
[laughing]:
Oh, my God.
397
00:16:20,327 --> 00:16:23,199
You're funny.
[chuckles]
398
00:16:23,243 --> 00:16:24,505
So, can I get it back?
399
00:16:24,548 --> 00:16:26,159
Oh, I'm so sorry.
400
00:16:26,202 --> 00:16:27,943
I mean, obviously, I want to,
401
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,250
but I just have to ask
my manager first, so...
402
00:16:30,293 --> 00:16:33,731
Tina, get your ass out here
right now!
403
00:16:34,776 --> 00:16:36,517
TINA:
I'm on lunch.
404
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:38,171
Oh, Tina, stop studying.
405
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:39,868
You're never gonna graduate.
406
00:16:39,911 --> 00:16:41,609
Just get out here!
407
00:16:41,652 --> 00:16:43,089
[laughs]
408
00:16:43,132 --> 00:16:45,917
She's so stupid.
409
00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:48,485
Donna, what is your...
410
00:16:48,529 --> 00:16:51,532
My good friend, Cooper James,
left his stuff here
411
00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:52,968
and needs some help
getting it back.
412
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:53,969
Is that cool?
413
00:16:57,886 --> 00:17:00,280
Oh...
414
00:17:01,324 --> 00:17:03,457
Oh, damn it, Tina!
415
00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:06,068
This is why celebrities
never come in here.
416
00:17:09,898 --> 00:17:12,379
I'm-I'm sorry.
417
00:17:16,644 --> 00:17:19,038
Good news, guys.
I have your stuff back.
418
00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:20,952
You remember my bodyguard.
419
00:17:20,996 --> 00:17:21,953
Ha-ha! Nightmare.
420
00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:23,303
[grunts]
421
00:17:23,346 --> 00:17:24,739
[laughs]
422
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:27,437
Same old Nightmare.
423
00:17:27,481 --> 00:17:30,049
God, our treasures.
424
00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:31,528
[chuckles]
425
00:17:31,572 --> 00:17:33,748
The boomerang theory is real.
426
00:17:33,791 --> 00:17:35,054
Sorry we made fun
of you about it.
427
00:17:35,097 --> 00:17:36,533
You guys didn't make fun of me.
428
00:17:36,577 --> 00:17:39,362
Oh. [chuckles]
We did.Uh...
429
00:17:40,885 --> 00:17:42,104
Ah. Rebethany!
430
00:17:42,148 --> 00:17:45,934
Aw, how did someone
not immediately buy you?
431
00:17:47,457 --> 00:17:49,590
'Cause I don't think
Satan shops at Goodwill.
432
00:17:53,246 --> 00:17:55,074
My Grammy. Ha!
433
00:17:55,117 --> 00:17:58,555
Uh, uh, this is so
unexpected. Um...
434
00:17:58,599 --> 00:18:00,035
Oh, wow, I'm shaking.
435
00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:03,256
Uh, thank you, uh, the...
to the academy. Uh, I want
436
00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:04,866
to thank Cooper for
bringing this back.
437
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,955
Uh... [stammers] They're
gonna play the music soon.
438
00:18:06,998 --> 00:18:09,827
Um, uh, support
music education!
439
00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:13,135
[laughs]:
Stupid.
440
00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:15,181
You know, this is weird.
Now that I'm looking at this,
441
00:18:15,224 --> 00:18:18,880
I'm realizing I haven't been
to a concert in years.
442
00:18:18,923 --> 00:18:20,360
Really?
443
00:18:20,403 --> 00:18:22,492
Well, not since the "flashing
of the band" incident.
444
00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:27,018
Never taking my mom
to see Andrea Bocelli again.
445
00:18:29,586 --> 00:18:31,022
Isn't he blind?
446
00:18:31,066 --> 00:18:32,415
He is now.
447
00:18:33,982 --> 00:18:37,464
And I haven't played in
my rec league since, uh...
448
00:18:37,507 --> 00:18:39,901
[sniffs, gags]
449
00:18:39,944 --> 00:18:42,512
...2010.
450
00:18:42,556 --> 00:18:44,123
Why'd you stop doing
those things?
451
00:18:44,166 --> 00:18:45,733
Oh, I don't know.
452
00:18:45,776 --> 00:18:47,735
I guess I-I like spending
my nights with Jake.
453
00:18:47,778 --> 00:18:49,737
And he hates live music.
454
00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:51,304
But why'd you quit basketball?
455
00:18:51,347 --> 00:18:53,306
You know, well, all the games
were on Sunday mornings,
456
00:18:53,349 --> 00:18:55,395
and that's when Claire and I go
to the farmers' market
457
00:18:55,438 --> 00:18:57,658
and buy a bunch of produce
that we throw out on Thursdays.
458
00:19:02,315 --> 00:19:05,970
Jake, I don't want
to be the girl who stops you
459
00:19:06,014 --> 00:19:07,276
from playing basketball.
460
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:08,973
Well, I don't want to be
the guy that stops you
461
00:19:09,017 --> 00:19:10,888
from going to concerts.
462
00:19:10,932 --> 00:19:14,153
We're not becoming Clake because
we scrubbed our old selves--
463
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:17,199
it's because we've stopped being
our old selves.
464
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:20,637
Wait, so Ididn't screw
you guys up?
465
00:19:20,681 --> 00:19:22,639
No way, man.
466
00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:24,989
Turns out, uh, we were
already screwed up.
467
00:19:25,033 --> 00:19:26,904
[chuckles]
468
00:19:26,948 --> 00:19:28,993
We just have to schedule
some time for you
469
00:19:29,037 --> 00:19:30,604
to go out there
and be Claire.
470
00:19:30,647 --> 00:19:33,259
Yeah. And for you
to be Jake. [chuckles]
471
00:19:33,302 --> 00:19:34,956
Thanks, babe.Thanks, babe.
472
00:19:34,999 --> 00:19:36,523
Hey!Hey!
473
00:19:36,566 --> 00:19:38,133
That... that was crazy.That was crazy.
474
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,308
[both chuckle]
475
00:19:39,352 --> 00:19:40,309
Booga booga!Booga booga!
476
00:19:40,353 --> 00:19:41,528
Ah!
[laughs]
477
00:19:43,051 --> 00:19:45,836
So, uh, do you think
the ladies at Goodwill
478
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,229
will let you bring
this stuff back?
479
00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:50,841
Yeah, I really don't think
I can go back there.
480
00:19:55,368 --> 00:19:57,196
Bye-bye, basket-bowls.
481
00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,417
Whoa! Whoa.Whoa!
482
00:20:01,461 --> 00:20:02,505
Those went up quick.
483
00:20:02,549 --> 00:20:03,419
Okay, well...
484
00:20:03,463 --> 00:20:04,681
[clicks tongue]
485
00:20:04,725 --> 00:20:06,683
Farewell, Rebethany.
[chuckles]
486
00:20:06,727 --> 00:20:10,426
You only had one eye,
but you saw me with two.
487
00:20:12,515 --> 00:20:14,300
I'm proud
of you guys.
488
00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:16,302
You're way too young and cool
to be living
489
00:20:16,345 --> 00:20:17,346
like Bonnie and Gerald.
490
00:20:17,390 --> 00:20:18,956
Which is why,
tomorrow night,
491
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,481
I am going to a concert
with my girlfriends.
492
00:20:21,524 --> 00:20:22,569
Ah.Yeah, and I'm gonna
493
00:20:22,612 --> 00:20:24,092
play basketball
with my old crew.
494
00:20:24,135 --> 00:20:25,659
Although it's been
so long, I don't know
495
00:20:25,702 --> 00:20:27,313
if I can still
talk smack.
496
00:20:27,356 --> 00:20:29,184
Man, your hair
looks stupid!
497
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,968
[chuckles]
Yep, still got it.[chuckles]
498
00:20:31,012 --> 00:20:32,448
[laughs]
499
00:20:32,492 --> 00:20:35,364
Hey, are you guys
seeing this?
500
00:20:35,408 --> 00:20:36,626
CLAIRE:
Oh, my God.
501
00:20:36,670 --> 00:20:37,932
She's not burning.
502
00:20:37,975 --> 00:20:40,151
[cackling]
503
00:20:40,195 --> 00:20:42,284
Aah!Aah!
504
00:20:42,328 --> 00:20:46,070
"Make me a grandchild,
and I'll spare your soul..."
505
00:20:46,114 --> 00:20:48,508
[chuckling]
506
00:20:49,509 --> 00:20:51,119
Uh, but seriously,
it's-it's weird
507
00:20:51,162 --> 00:20:52,555
that she's not burning, right?
508
00:20:52,599 --> 00:20:54,296
Yeah, we should
probably go inside.Yeah.
509
00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:59,040
Good riddance.
[spits]
510
00:20:59,083 --> 00:21:00,650
[screams]
511
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:08,092
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
512
00:21:08,136 --> 00:21:11,139
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
36759
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