All language subtitles for Deadpool.and.Wolverine.2024.2160p.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.Atmos.DV.HDR.H.265-FLUX

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: Eߣ�B��B��B�B�B��matroskaB��B��S�gZ M�t�M��S��I�fS��M��S��T�kS���M��S��S�kS���#M��S��T�gS��X��O�I�f@�*ױ�B@M��libebml v1.4.4 + libmatroska v1.7.1WA�mkvmerge v74.0.0 ('You Oughta Know') 64-bitD��A]K�Da� f��m��s���?ۙ���Dv��,�T�k���ׁsňė�-r�V̓�������S_TEXT/UTF8"���enU��U���D)C�u@�炊������That logo music just gets you pumped. Right?��ʠϡɁqI'm sorry. I just, I'm excited to be here. It's been a while.�� �C�u@�炦.�̡ƁYou know, for a long time, I wasn't sure I'd ever be back.�� ����� �Disney bought Fox...����Сʁthere was a whole boring rights issue, blabbity-blabbity-blah.�� �C�u@���������But then, it turned out, they wanted me.�� ��ơ�� eThe one guy who shouldn't even have his own movie...�� qC�u@���+�����much less a franchise.��0�����MMarvel's so stupid.��M������Look, we know the title of this thing. So...���C�u@���*�����I know what you're wondering.��5�Ρȁ�How are we gonna do this without dishonoring Logan's memory?���C�u�� p�����And I'll tell you how.�������� We're not.��AC�u@��������I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.��Р����wWolverine is not dead.��ʠɡÁ�Sure, it made for a perfect ending to a very sad story.�� �C�u@��<�ǡ��But that's not how regenerative healing factors work.�� 5�աρ �You think I wanna be out here in beautiful downtown North Dakota...�� /C�u@��W��ǡ��digging up the one and only Wolverine? No, thank you.�� ����� �But the fate of my entire world is at stake.�� C�u��n6�աρHe may not be living his best life, but he sure as hell ain't dead.��dC�u��������Bingo.��蠒���Yahtzee.���C�u���ڠ����Yes, yes, yes.�� ;C�u��������Damn it!��蠙���#Son of a bitch!�� AC�u���x�����You...��;����� �Christ. Motherfucker!�� �C�u���������My world is fuck...������� �That was weird.�� ������I'm much calmer now.��_C�u��{�����Look, I'm not a man of science.�� ����� �But you seem incredibly passed away.�� AC�u@��Gossip Girl.��v����� 5Here we go. Maximum effort.���C�u���K�ġ��Okay, peanut. Guess we're getting that team up after all.�� �C�u���y�����Maradona from outside the box!��*������{\an8}Goal!��#C�u��}������Come on, big fella.���C�u��'�����I am soaking wet right now.�� pC�u@��1s�����To be clear, I'm not proud of any of this.��Рӡ́wThe wanton violence, the whiff of necrophilia. It isn't who I am.��#C�u@��I������It isn't who I wanna be.��6������Who I wanna be?��⠵��� eWell, to help you understand that...��/�����;I've gotta take you back.��C�u@��`��á��A little joyride I took through space and time...�� ����� �to the day that changed everything.�� �C�u���������{\an8}I can't believe I'm finally here.��Y�����{\an8}I've waited for this moment for so long.�� �C�u���Ҡ����Thank you, sir, for seeing me.��M����� �I firmly believe...��SC�u@���T�����that my services could be of...�� ������great use to your organization. Now I know...�� ��š��I was caught smashturbating in the lobby of Stark Tower...���C�u@��������- but I can assure you that... - Smashturbating?��������_I'm sorry, what, what was that?������� �No, I'm sorry. That, that's when you get those toy...�� �C�u@���ϡɁHulk hands, right? And then you just, you look down, and you just...�� j������you brace yourself, and you ravage the midsection.�� C�u@��z�¡��- Pinch the... Yeah. Okay. - I get it. Okay, thank you.��ܠ�����- The picture's painted. - You get the gist.��S�����|What exactly brings you here today?��wC�u��4�����Why am I... Wow. Okay.�� ������ ;I care.��S������I know I turn everything into a joke, but I...�� �C�u��YY�����I care, and I, I wanna use that feeling...�� A�����Sfor something important.��SC�u��p������I, I wanna matter.��6������I need to show my girl that I matter.���C�u@���E�����And...��������you know, I feel like I'm wasting the good stuff here.��Р����#- Is the man not gonna be joining us? - The man?��|C�u@���������Yeah. I should save this if he's gonna...��M����� kAs, as far as you're concerned right now, I'm the man.��S�����d- No. - The man is me.��eC�u���������I am the man in this circumstance.�� �������He doesn't do this kind of thing anymore.���C�u@��������- Cameos? - Meetings.��A������- Meetings. - Entry-level meetings.������� �Entry-level?�������QAren't you the chauffeur...��+C�u���3�����- maybe? - I... Common misconception.��Р����x- Okay. - I did begin my career as Mr. Stark's driver.�� C�u@���]�����- Okay. - Quickly pivoted to...��蠲����- Chauffeur. - ...the Head of Security.��_����� �The Head of... Of course, yes, yes, yes.��*�����dAnd why I am vetting your résumé.�� ;C�u@��������You seem to have left out whether or not you had...��#������any experience as a member of a team.��ܠ����MCould you maybe add a little bit of perspective there?���C�u@��67�����No, yes, of course. I was Special Forces...��v����� - Okay. - but I was... Mainly, I was team leader...�� Ġ�����founder, really, of X-Force.��;C�u@��N������Sadly, they, they all perished in action though.��|�����#How exactly did that happen?�� ����� �Well, the police say gravity, but if...��SC�u@��dp�����Just between us...��A������- they didn't test well in the focus group. - I see.��/����� �- Particularly Cable. - X-Force.��֠á��;Whoa, whoa, whoa. Look, I can see this isn't going well.��SC�u��~������Please stop writing. Look, I, I...��_�����I'm just... I wanna be an Avenger.��)C�u���������I wanna be an Avenger.��֠����SWhy do you wanna be an Avenger?��_C�u@��y�ΡȁLook around you. I mean, they're the, they're the best of the best.�� ������ 5And, and what they do matters.���C�u@���T�����I need to be an Avenger.��ʠסс �Sir, my girl has kinda had it with my shtick, and I, if I don't, you know...�� �C�u@���蠿���turn things around and do something with my gifts...�� A����� �I don't think it's gonna really work out for me...��������and I wouldn't blame her.���C�u���栽���Avengers are a very unique group of superheroes...���������that stand for something...��eC�u�� ������more than just fighting and wearing costumes.�� ����� �I mean, people look up to us. Kids look up to us.�� eC�u@�� U�����- They... - I'm sorry. "Us?"��������_I wasn't aware that you were an Avenger.��֠����M- Avengers-adjacent, technically. - Oh, wow.���C�u@�� 2��ɡÁWhat's your superpower? Is it parallel parking? I am so sorry.�� ⠙��� �That was cruel.��⠻���^I lash out when I'm nervous. Won't happen again.��MC�u@�� OM�����- Let's cut to the chase. - Please.�� ������You just said moments ago...��6����� �that you wanted to be an Avenger because you need it.��MC�u@�� l�����Yes, sir, I do.���¡���But the Avengers don't do the job because they need it.�� �����AThey do the job because people need them.��|C�u�� �������Do you see the distinction?�������� �Yes, sir.���C�u�� ������Please, Mr. Hogan.���ӡ́�I don't wanna spend the rest of my life like an annoying one-trick pony.�� �C�u�� �������All right.��蠦����Oh, my God, you're standing.��/������Yeah, now's the time that we stand.��5C�u�� �S�����Damn it.��A������Now, the problem might be that you're...�������� Areaching a little, little too high.���C�u@�� ������Aim for the middle, and you'll never miss.�� q�͡ǁ Right? I think you got a good heart. I believe what you're saying.��vC�u�� �'�͡ǁBut not everybody's the world-saving type. I'm not, and I'm happy.�� 5������Right? I found my place.���C�u@�� �����Find your place.��⠵��� �- All right? Get back out there. - Mm-hmm.��_������- We'll keep an eye on you. Good luck. - Okay.�� ;C�u@�� ?ܠ����Fetch the car. I wanna hit Shake Shack.��}����� GRejection makes me hungy.��֠����_- Really? No? - No, no. Please.��C�u@�� Y砻���- Yeah, no, no, no. Okay, thank you. - Oh, okay.�� ������You know what they say. When one door closes...�� C�u�� }ߠ����your locker at work opens.��C�u�� �N�ˡŁNow let's go sell some certified pre-owned vehicles, motherfu...�� �C�u�� �ʠ����Technically, the, the Carnival's not a minivan.�� ������qIt's an MPV.���C�u@�� �ɠ����So how does the Kia compare to...��0������- the Honda Odyssey? - The Odyssey?�� ����� �That's a great question. It doesn't fucking suck.�� �C�u@�� �ڠ¡��You know, you can answer the question without swearing.�������� GI'm sorry, Tammy, I don't, I don't have kids.��}������Not that I haven't dreamt of that...��/C�u�� 8�����but I don't have a lot of vaginal sex.���C�u@�� ޠ����{\an8}You'll get 'em next time, pal.��_�����And look, you can always go back to superhero-ing.�� ������FI mean, I know I'd like to see you back in the suit.��SC�u@�� 8<�����I don't keep it in my locker so that I can wear it.�� p�š�� I keep it in my locker in case we need to saddle up again.�� �C�u�� M������Hey, hey, hey. What? What is that doing in there?�� ;����� �I'm done.��AC�u�� d.�����I'm done.��蠧����And I'm fine with being done.��Р����FLook, is sales the best match?���C�u�� z������Probably not.��A�ǡ���Is this the life that I always imagined for myself? Fuck no.�� /C�u@�� �̠����But this is the right fit for me, Sugar Bear, it is.�� A����� eOkay, Mr. Wilson.����ʡāeI'm just saying, once a month, we could go on a little mission.���C�u@�� �}�����We're human beings. We crave purpose.�� Ġ���� kAfter all, we're Deadpool.����֡Ё�Please stop saying that. We're not Deadpool. I'm not even Deadpool anymore.��wC�u@�� �F�����Well, if you're gonna have a midlife crisis, go big.�� ����� �A few years ago...���̡ƁGa friend of mine got his nipples pierced with a titanium chain...�� �C�u�� �렺���that goes down and attaches to his Van Johnson.�� �C�u�� C�ˡŁAre, are you feeling grumplestiltskin 'cause it's your birthday?�� 5C�u�� "H�����What?��B�����*No.��A������No.��AC�u�� B������Surprise!��֠�����Hey, you guys are lucky I'm not armed.�� GC�u@�� V������Get in here.��������6If this were six years ago, you'd all be dead.��ʠȡ�So then, he gets out of the cab, and you will not believe it.�� �C�u@�� p������- I turn around, and what do I find? - AirPods.�� ����� �- His AirPods. Come on. - His AirPods!�� �����vCrazy story.���C�u�� �m�����- Every time. Come on. - Every single time.�� G�����kMake any sales today?���C�u@�� ������You know I didn't.��_�СʁDid you sell any dreamcatchers on Etsy or whatever it is that you do?�� 5������Our rent's due in three days, Wade.���C�u@�� �A�����I can't keep carrying you.��⠢����Relax. I have the money.��Y�ʡā �I sold some old blood pressure medication I found lying around.�� XC�u@�� Й�����You tryin' to kill me, motherfucker?��_�á��I'm not the one dousing everything in salt, motherfucker.��M������I pray every day that...���C�u@�� �3�����fire finds your body...��������)and finishes the job...��_����� /- God didn't have the nuts to do. - That's hurtful.�� �C�u@�� ���ˡŁIf you could hear the look on my face, you'd smell how sad I am.�� ����� �You watched anything good?��e������Great British Bake Off.��/C�u@�� =�����Oh, goddamn.�� ������That show stood between me and suicide for ten years.�� �¡��vThose are my feelings on abortion, religious freedom...�� GC�u@�� 0������animal rights, privacy rights, vaccines...��#������free-market capitalism, global climate change.��������Yeah, duh-duh-duh. No, no speaking lines, Buck.��MC�u@�� MF�����Hi, Yukio.��������eHi, Wade.���������Nice fake o'clock shadow.�������� It's a summer balayage. From the French.�� �C�u�� mӠ����It's meant to mimic the natural highlights of the sun.�� _����� - It's a toupée. - It's a hair system.���C�u�� �,�����- I love your hair system, Wade. - Thank you.�� ������RWanna do some cocaine?��0C�u@�� �T�ǡ��Hey, cocaine is the one thing that Feige said is off limits.�� ��ҡ́ 5- What about Bolivian marching powder? - They know all the slang terms.�� kC�u@�� �������They have a list.��������e- Even snowboarding? - Even disco dust.�������� �- White girl interrupted? - Even Forrest Bump.��/�����d- Booger sugar? - I wouldn't even try powdered gonuts.��SC�u�� �������- You wanna build a snowman? - Yes. But I can't.�� �������Pull here.��AC�u�� �]�����- Here? - Yeah.��蠲��� G- What happened? - That's the fun part.���C�u�� ������Thanks for coming.��e����� Yeah.�������� GHow's work?��蠠���SOh, I got a promotion.���C�u�� ������No way.��k�ġ��Yeah. It's mind-numbing middle management, but I'm happy.�� ������AThat's great.��C�u��*������- You seeing anyone? - How about you?��5����� �Yeah.��A������A guy from work. Dermot.�� �C�u��Fv�����Dermot.��������- He's kind. - Good.��5����� �Likes to go hiking.��ܠ����Hasn't gotten me shot yet.��_C�u��]������Well, it's early days.��MC�u@��u������What about you? You seeing anyone?��֠ҡ́ �No, no, I live in a one-bedroom apartment. I share a bed with Blind Al.�� C�u���l�����- Okay. All right. - All right.�� ������5Happy birthday to you�� �C�u���������- Speech! Speech! - Yes!��������All right. Okay, okay, okay.��������kBirthdays.���C�u@���š��Boy, every spin around the moon is a new adventure indeed.�� k����� - Sun, dumbass. - Okay, round-earther.���C�u@��䀠����- Where was I? - The adventure of life.��}�����#Right.��蠬��� �It's been a challenging few years.�������� Haven't seen you guys in a while.��SC�u@���������Been through a lot, change of life.��#������- Menopause? - Bitch, are you improv-ing?��|������- Mm-mm. - Sorry.��/C�u��`�����I'm sorry that you had to see that, Yukio.��_�����It's okay.��<�����4But I'm happy.��C�u@��3G�����You know, and that's, that's...��⠯����because of each and every one of you.�� 蠯����I guess, what I'm trying to say is...���C�u@��K������how proud I am, how grateful I am...��_�����to be standing in a room...��⠪��� �with every single person I love.�� kC�u��wO�����I'm the luckiest man alive.��Y�����Make a wish, buddy.��<C�u���N�����Ten-four, good buddy.��6����� �Going down.��eC�u@���������Wade Wilson?��k�����Oh, yeah. Dancers. Dopinder must have ordered you.�� e�����jAre those supposed to be cop costumes?��5C�u��˞�����Never mind.����ۡՁYTake your clothes off but leave the helmets. And this isn't Pretty Woman.�� C�u��⻠����We're kissing. All right?�� ������What song do you guys normally dance to?��Y�����jWhoa, whoa, whoa!�� C�u��[�����Is that supposed to be scary?����á��_Pegging isn't new for me, friendo. But it is for Disney.��)C�u��������Ah, ta, ta, ta!��B�ءҁeOkay, I've never been a natural bottom, so we're gonna take things real slow.���C�u@��)������And I want some crazy eye contact.��S������Not you. You.���š�� �Can't see your eyes through the mask, but I can feel them.��C�u@��?�����We're gonna move on down the hallway...��0�ޡ؁�so we can spare a cleanup on aisle asshole. How does everyone feel about this plan?�� _C�u��R�š��- I don't like you. - Yes. Let's hold on to that attitude.�� ������ 5And we're gonna do it angry.���C�u���������Mr. Wilson...�������� you appear to have soiled yourself while unconscious.�� ;C�u@���{�����I wasn't unconscious. Who are you?��ʠ���� I go by the name of Paradox.��������Mr. Paradox. And you're sitting here at the TVA.�� XC�u@���8�����The Time Variance Authority.��Р����wWe're really a watchdog organization...��ʠ̡Ɓ�except we're more lighthearted than that sounds with a sort of...��}C�u��B�����throwback, ironic twist.��$�Сʁ�And we're in charge of defending what's known as the Sacred Timeline.��qC�u@��#�ǡ��Holy fuck. That is a shit-ton of exposition for a threequel.�� _����� Is this because I used Cable's time machine?��SC�u@��4"�ȡBrought a couple of people back to life, then I destroyed it.�� A����� �- That was a long time ago. - Yes...��_������we're aware of your abuse of your timeline.�� jC�u��P!�����And you were so abusive of it.��M����� eNo, it has nothing to do with that.��S�����^Walk with me.��<C�u@��~��ˡŁI brought you here, Mr. Wilson, to tell you that you're special.��p�����^In fact, you've been chosen for a higher purpose...�� ;C�u������a purpose unclear even to me.��������MBut one that could...���������save the entire Sacred Timeline...�� eC�u��������from a possibly grisly fate sometime in the future...�� ����� �which may very well need to be... avenged.���C�u��׌�����This Sacred Timeline...��_����� �I assume I'm going to marvel...��}����� at how...��C�u@���C�����cinematic it feels?��֠����}Gratuitous cameos...��Р�����indiscriminate use of Variants, the whole package?��*C�u�� �����Well, you tell me.��MC�u��+۠����Cap!��AC�u��Kn�����You are no longer lost, Wade.�� Ġ���� kYou can be a hero among heroes.�� �C�u��a������We've been surveilling you for quite a while.��w����� - Subway station. - A TVA outpost, yes.�� �C�u��z%�����- And what is that? - Hmm?��e�����FIs that me? Is that Thor?��_C�u@���������Is he crying?��������_Let's not get ahead of ourselves.������� That happens in the distant future.��5�ǡ���- Why is Thor crying? Quick! Tell me. - Do not speak to her.���C�u@���Ϡ����Stop that. Eyes on me.��A������I brought you here to offer you an opportunity.����ҡ́ /The opportunity you sought years ago, but for which you were not ready.�� �C�u@���V�����We believe you're ready now.��Y�����Ready for a chance to leave your timeline...��S������and join the greatest universe of all.�� C�u@��������I am about to give you the thing you've always wanted.��������Oh, I smell what you're steppin' in.���ǡ�� XThe power in the Marvel Universe is about to change forever.�� qC�u��$�����I am the Messiah...�������� �I am...��wC�u��!L�����Marvel Jesus.���̡Ɓ kCan you excuse me for just a moment? I'm just gonna go over here.�� �C�u��C������Suck it, Fox!��_�����I'm going to Disneyland.�� ����� /Get fucked!��kC�u@��b�¡��- Where do I sign? - Oh, there's no need for paperwork.��������MGood. Not to brag, but I do not read.���������- Oh. - There is one thing I will need, though.�� eC�u���q�����Oh, fuck off!��#������Adorn me, Beardo.���C�u���r�����Fuckin' A!���������It's perfect! FYI...��)������your tailor is a predator, but I love it. Snug.�� C�u�� ʠ����No camel toe. New car smell and adamantium katanas?��������You shouldn't have.���C�u@��'X�����Go ahead. Take it in.��M������And yes, your underwear is getting tighter.�� Ġ����^That guy knows what I'm talking about.��YC�u@��A������His clothes says middle management...��ܠ�����but his eyes say fuck-y fuck-y.�� �������Yes. You look very nice.���C�u@��Y��ȡ"Nice?" Your buddy here is ready to throw it all away for me.�� ᠩ��� �- You callin' your wife? - HR.���������Does your wife work in HR?���C�u@��p������I'm really glad you're taking this so well.��$����� qOh. I'm taking it well.���ơ��I have never had a problem traveling for work. That said...�� �C�u@��� �����we should talk vacation days.��������I'm more of a one-week-on-one-week-off kind of guy.�� q�����I think it's what they do in Denmark.��6C�u@����ǡ��You know, you'll never see a Danish flag on the moon, but...�� ������ Agoddamn it, they're happy.��<�š��#Now, let's power up your little Amazon Fire phone there...�� �C�u@�����ڡԁand zip me back home so I can let my friends know that they've been upgraded...�� ������ /to disciples.��������Yeah. I don't think you... quite understand.�� �C�u���s�ݡׁYou will not be returning to your home because there will be no home to return to.��p�����Come again?��AC�u���r�����This time in my ears.��C�u@��������This is your universe, Mr. Wilson.�� e����� �That...���ġ��_is what happens when a universe loses their Anchor Being.���C�u��,������See how it decays from the inside?��#�¡���- This is how a reality dies. - What's an Anchor Being?�� jC�u@��@n�֡ЁAn Anchor Being is an entity of such vital importance that when they die...�� ����� �their whole world slowly withers out of existence.�� �C�u@��\m�����You've just won the lottery because I didn't die.�� A����� �It was just a little midlife crisis. I'm better now.��������:Oh, no, no, no.���C�u���������- Oh, my God. - Oh, I love to laugh.�� ������ ;Can you imagine if you were the Anchor Being?�� �C�u@��� �����- Yeah. - No, it isn't you, Mr. Wilson.�� Ġȡ Your Anchor Being died in an act of self-sacrifice so epic...���C�u���t�����that it sent shivers down the Timeline.��M����� �I am referring, of course, to...�� C�u���Ҡ����Logan. The Wolverine.��|C�u���$�����Don't be what they made you.�� C�u��+Ƞ����So this is what it feels like...��w������Logan.���C�u��B堔���Of course.��蠐����Logan.��AC�u��Xa�����Logan?�� ������The guy with forks for hands?�������� �That Wolverine?���C�u@��p��ۡՁYeah, I got it. You can turn your retro graphics of death off now. Make it stop.��ʠơ��pWe're not doing it, Mr. Wilson. We certainly can't stop it.�� �C�u@��������How long have we got?��������eIn most cases, couple thousand years.�� �����)- Well, sweet. - Well, most cases aren't fast enough.���C�u@���������Not for me.��������What does that mean?��蠭��� �It means that I have been tasked...��$�����^with overseeing the end of your universe.���C�u@��Nj�͡ǁAnd regardless of what the pencil pushers upstairs would prefer...�� A����� �I will not...��e�¡��waste my life watching it die slowly of natural causes.�� �C�u@���$�����We used to just prune these things. Simple.��w����� Elegant. Efficient. But I'm told the TVA...��������qdoesn't like to do that anymore. Well I do.���C�u@���ˡŁAnd no matter what my so-called superiors say, the multiverse...�� ����� �does not need a babysitter.���������We need a mercy killer.���C�u��������And in this instance...��������/I am the mercy killer.�� qC�u��<�����What in the MacGuffin is that?��}�����$That's a Time Ripper, Mr. Wilson.��v�����AAn accelerant.��C�u@��T�ݡׁOnce completed, it will allow me to destroy the spacetime matrix of your universe.��蠴����You see, I don't want to work for the TVA.���C�u@��o�����I want to be the TVA.��#�á���And the first step involves showing this organization...�� ���^how much more efficient it can become.���C�u@�����СʁTo wit, I will be giving your universe a swift and compassionate end.��à����jAnd don't worry, your friends won't feel a thing.���C�u���'�����It'll be over just like this. "Oh, what's that?"������� _Trust me.��;C�u@���f�����You're gonna Old Yeller my fucking universe?��v����� Mm... In your parlance, yes.��������dTwo in the heart, one in the head.��C�u@���|�����Look, Mr. Wilson, you have two choices.����֡ЁMYou can either rejoin your loved ones and collectively cease to exist in...�� �C�u��������I'd say, seventy-two hours. Or...�� ����� �you join the Sacred Timeline.�� �C�u��'E�����And you end your days of insignificance...��ʠ���� pand mediocrity.��}������Wade.���C�u��?2�����Wade, you can finally...��������Sfinally, matter.�� pC�u��v �����That's all I've ever really wanted.���������I know.��⠑����I know.���C�u���������And you know I'm, I'm nothing if not morally flexible.�� �C�u��������Yep, yep.�������� �I'll do it.�������jWise choice. The Sacred Timeline's happy to have you.�� qC�u���������I was actually talking about finding the Wolverine...��)������and breaking your fucking nose.��;C�u��������Find him. Find him!�� ����� �And boy, did he ever.���C�u��������Which brings us back to this.��������The desecration of the sacred corpse.���C�u��A+�����Oh, my God!�������� AOh! My own fucking arm!�� AC�u@��eʠ����Now we're talkin'!��<������Not like this!�� ����� kNo, dear God! No!���������I'm sorry! Wolverine-ing is hard!��wC�u���������Make it stop!��蠘����Mangold tried.���C�u@���Π����You sick fuck!��������MLogan was a hero.����ơ�� �And the only thing worth a shit to ever come out of Canada.�� �C�u���ˠ����Get my country's name out of your fuckin' mouth.���C�u���������And my sword. Give me that.��/C�u@���������Oh, I gotta find me another Logan.��󠗡�� �An alive one.�� ������Don't get up, guys. I'll see myself out.��wC�u��-�����Logan!��B������I'm gonna need you to come with me.��YC�u��Jˠ����Who's asking?��蠳��� _Oh, look at this little Hairy Lou Retton.���C�u��_ʠ����Did you stick the landing, little guy?��0������Yes, you did!��B����� �Comic accurate short king.��}C�u@��t������Such a cute wittle Wolvie.��#������Cue the fuckin' montage, baby.���������Ahoy! Everything seems to be on fire.�� �C�u��������You have a dragon?��<�����*You have Anchor Being written all over...�� dC�u��������Patch!��蠜��� �Now we're talkin'.��⠓���4Oh, yeah.�� C�u@���Ġ����That's the whole goddamn package right there.��}����� eHowdy!��;�����GI'm just... I'm auditioning Anchor Beings.�� �C�u���u�����Oh. Yeah, that's gonna need some coconut oil.�� �C�u��z�����What in the fuck?��)������Are you okay?��ܠ�����Oh, yes, yes.��C�u��/̠����Classic John Byrne brown and tan.��*������Now, you fought the Hulk in this outfit. No?���C�u��J~�����I'm Marvel Jesus, you dull creature, and I will not...���C�u��{��á��It's not you. We're just going in a different direction.�� �C�u@���n�š��You know, from behind, you look a little bit like Henry...��M������Oh, my fuck!���������The Cavillrine. The legends are true.�� �C�u@���������And may I say, sir, on behalf of all humanity...�� ������ dthis just feels right.����ҡ́�We will treat you so much better than those shit fucks down the street.�� C�u��������You were just leavin'.��������No, sir. Not while the fate of my universe is at...��vC�u���:�����This one looks promising.��������0Down you go.��A�����qAgain.��AC�u@��Q�����I told you. You're not welcome here.��������MYou're not welcome anywhere.��������|Now get the fuck out of my bar.���C�u@��,�����Just give me one more drink and then I'll leave.�� ������ AThat's not how it works.��Y�����AIt does now. Leave the bottle.���C�u��4ޠ����I know you, bub?��A������Nope. But I know you.��#����� �Everybody knows me.��_C�u��N�����I'm the Wolverine.��������5Yes, you are.������� �And I'm gonna need you to come with me right now.���C�u��ip�����Look, lady, I'm not interested.��_�ˡŁ- Really gettin' into your cups here. - Why would I go with you?�� �C�u@��~ ����Because, unfortunately...��*������I need you...����¡�� and even more unfortunately, my entire world needs you.���C�u��������You two gonna fuck or fight?���C�u@���+�����You gonna take that from him?��������/Yep.��B����� �I can tell you have a sort of...���͡ǁ�don't-get-too-close-I'll-only- break-your-heart vibe going here...�� �C�u@����ġ��but every other Wolverine would've really hurt me by now.��ʠȡ qAnd, I'm sort of on the tick-tick. So upsy-daisy. Here we go.�� ;C�u���R�á��- Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey! - Up you go. I got you, big guy.���C�u@���K�����Whiskey dick of the claws.��e�ϡɁ - It's quite common in Wolverines over forty. - You don't want this.�� ������MYou're right. I don't. And you don't want this.�� �C�u@��,�ϡɁUnless you wanna take a deep breath through your fuckin' forehead...�� A����� �I suggest you reconsider.��S������Let's go, peanut.��;C�u��=�����Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.��)����� �Watch this.��B������All right. That... Whoa.���C�u��Y/�����Easy.��A�����Good God.��AC�u@��qo�����Thirsty little honey badger, aren't ya?��֠���� eIt's okay. Keep goin'.�������Audiences are accustomed to long run times.��*C�u���C�����Guess you'll have to do.��������}Okay, here we...��蠤���Oh! Look at those jammies.�� C�u��������That only took twenty fucking years.�� ������SOne Anchor Being coming right up!���C�u��Ӿ�����On your left, baby girl.��#�ɡÁ GThis Logan has the same he-can-do-anything-even-musicals look.�� C�u@��걠����And bonus...��蠬����he's actually wearing a costume...�� �ɡÁ Alike he's not embarrassed to be in a superhero movie for once.���������I don't understand.��5C�u@��!�����You said my universe is dying...��������/because this sack of nuts got himself killed.�� q�����G- Well, problem solved. - My God.�� �C�u��������You actually think you can replace an Anchor Being...��������Gwith this?���C�u@��6 �ˡŁI wouldn't have accepted any other Wolverine BT dubs. But you...�� �ġ�� �have outdone yourself and brought me the worst Wolverine!�� YC�u��P������What do you mean, the worst one?��������eMr. Wilson.�������� �This Wolverine let down his entire world.�� 5C�u��j򠻡��He's the stuff of legend, but not in a good way.��S������And what he did...�� �����}well...���C�u��~Π����some things are just beyond forgiveness.��M�����dOkay.��AC�u����¡��How do I... How do I make this right? I'll do anything.�� k����� _I gave you a chance at greatness.�� �C�u@���������Because my superiors deemed you special.��󠬡�� �Clearly not special in a good way.��ܠơ��Apparently you have some important future purpose to serve.�� C�u��Ƀ�����With Thor. He holds me.��e�ɡÁ But, I did my duty. I gave you the opportunity to be somebody.��wC�u@��ޫ�ΡȁAnd instead of accepting my offering with humility and gratitude...�� ������ /you broke my nose.��B�ġ���- It looks great. - And you decimated dozens of my men...�� �C�u@���'�����with the exhumed corpse of a hero.��Y�����Dishonoring not only his remains but his memory.���������What are you, the Internet?��C�u�������Your world is dying!��w����� Thank you very much.��蠥����And there's no stopping it.��eC�u@��+Ѡ����The humane thing to do...��ܠ�����is to make it quick.��k�ǡ�� �Is the thought of vaporizing my universe making you peckish?�� �C�u@��A������I'm eating my feelings.���ءҁ�I'm about to lose everything that I've ever cared about because that hairy...�� ⠬���@thundercunt from down undercunt...���C�u��Z^�ġ��finally dies and he's standing right behind me, isn't he?�� ⠩����Welcome to the MCU, by the way.�� C�u@��p������You're joining at a bit of a low point.���������As for you, I wanna talk to your boss.��|�ϡɁ�I want you to get him on the phone and you tell him, her, or them...�� _C�u���s�����that Marvel H. Christ isn't playing.��MC�u���������Holy shit.����ơ��*I just heard a symphony of buttholes clenching all at once.���C�u@���_�����You're off grid.��k�ʡāYour bosses don't know what you sick fucks are doing down here.�� �ġ�� �Well, I'll tell you what. I have a black belt in Karen...�� �C�u@��ܽ�����And I'm gonna go upstairs...�� ������and I'm gonna tell 'em all about you and your...���������Silence is nice, isn't it?��YC�u���z�����Where the fuck did he go?��蠱����To the trash heap. You'll fit right in.���C�u�� g�����That was close.��BC�u�� d������Don't just stand there, you ape.��S����� �Give me a hand up.��C�u�� yz�����Nope. I'm actually okay. Thank you very much...��S�����AWhere the hell are we?��AC�u@�� �������I don't know. Looks kind of Mad Max-y.�� ������ �But that would be IP infringement, right?��S������Fucking jokes.���C�u@�� ����Fuck! Fuck.��_�����Were you even listening back there?��5�¡�� �If we don't make it back to that Mr. Paradox asshole...�� kC�u�� ʈ�����everyone I know is gonna die.��������5Not my fuckin' problem.�������� _Oh, is that all you got?���C�u�� ߱�����Is that what you said when your world went to shit?��Р����jCome again?��AC�u@�� ������Yeah, I heard all about you.��_�����}How you screwed up everything.����ѡˁYou should be thankin' me for pulling you out of that bed you shit in.�� kC�u��!O�����You back-stabbing son of a bitch!���C�u��!0������Are you ready to be calm now?���C�u��!Q󠞡��Rest in pieces, Fox.�� �C�u��!�U�����I don't want to fight you, peanut.��ܠ���� �Doesn't matter what you did.��������jI just need your help.��C�u��!�$�����I don't fuckin' care.��/������Uh-oh.��AC�u��!ځ�����Fuck. This is gonna hurt.�� GC�u��!������All right.��5������Fuck it.��B����� XLet's give the people what they came for.��SC�u��" Ҡ����Let's fuckin' go.��֠���� eGet your special sock out, nerds.���C�u��"������It's gonna get good.��*C�u��"�ߠ����Gotcha!���C�u��#~�����Baby Knife!��AC�u@��#)������Let's see you grow your fuckin' head back.��������Wait, wait, wait! I can fix it! I can fix it.��������G- Fix what? - Whatever it is that you did.���C�u��#DϠ����Whatever made you so bad.��_�����SThose, those pricks in the TVA. You heard him.���C�u��#_Ԡ����They have the power to end my universe...��⠷����but they also have the power to change yours.�� C�u��#x�����We get back there...��;������and we can fix your world. Together.�� �C�u��#� �����I promise.��;����� They can fix it.��⠎���^Hey!���C�u��#�������We fight each other, we lose.��Р����wDear God, it's him.��⠜��� �- Who? - The one.���C�u@��#������The superhero equivalent to comfort food, or Molly.�� G�ϡɁ �White guys' answer to all the disappointments. And another A-lister.�� C�u@��#�?�����Fair warning, gorgeous.��_�����You're going to encounter some indelicate language...��������Sa smidge of ass play, but we've been prohibited...�� C�u��#�V�����from using cocaine. On camera.��_�����They're coming.��B����� AWho's "they?"���C�u��$*�����Oh, they're driving angry.���C�u��$7|�����Now that's a superhero landing.���C�u��$Z������I got this.���C�u��$�������Stay close.��A������Aye, aye, Cap'n.��k�����LYou got this.���C�u��$�!�ġ��Cassandra is gonna be giddy when she sees what we caught.�� Y�����jYou can't run.���C�u@��$������Everybody knows that.��������_You see anyone runnin', dick for brains?��M�����You're not gonna love what happens next.���C�u��%T�����Oh. Oh, my God.��������}Oh, my God.��A����� e- Oh, my God, he's gonna say it. - Ah! Fuck.���C�u@��%�����- Oh, my God! He's gonna say it! - Say what?��M������Avengers, assemble...��蠭��� �- Flame on! - I'm sorry, what now?���C�u��%�������Fuck!��BC�u��%�ܠ����We don't know that guy.��;������We thought we did.��k����� GI know you.���������Holy...��AC�u��%�ɠ����Sabretooth.��������Your brother.��A����� �Ready to die?���C�u@�%� ����Wait, wait, wait! Time!��ʠ���� �You look ridiculous.��������People have waited decades for this fight.�� �C�u@��%𺠮���It's not gonna be easy. Baby Knife.��������*Shoot the double, you take him down.��֠�����Side control, then full mount...���C�u@��&נ͡ǁand you ground and pound till he makes no sound because he's dead.�� ������ 5Shut the fuck up!��A�����Oh, my God!���C�u��&Y�����Okay. Good luck. I'm a huge fan.��YC�u��&U������What is it, girl?��;������Is there trouble at the well?��eC�u��&w+�����Big trouble.��������;Behold!��0����� The head of your precious queen...�� ;C�u��&������Furiosa!��蠟���wI have the Wolverine!���������I alone control her!�� C�u��&�p�����You come for me...��}����� qyou come for her.�� GC�u��&���ۡՁSo sorry. I know it's pronounced "him." I'm gender blind. It's my cross to bear.��)������Who's next?���C�u��&������Toad!��������You're up.��kC�u��&�l�����- Uh-oh. Oh, holy... - Fuck.���C�u��'1 �����God of Thunder.���C�u@��'G������How long was I asleep?�� ������Not all of you was asleep.�������� YDon't bother.��_�����_They're very thorough.���C�u��'d&�����If you know where we are, start talking.�������� �You're in The Void.��蠣���@Think of it as purgatory.�� C�u@��'}ݠ����Reed called it a metaphysical junkyard.�� q�ʡā Where anything useless goes before it gets annihilated forever.�� 5C�u@��'�G�ߡفAnd where the TVA sends people that don't play nice with the rest of the multiverse.��������G- Like you? - And you.���C�u@��'�������What does the annihilating?��_������Alioth.��B�ϡɁ �Alioth is in this thing? From Loki, season one, episode five?��SC�u@��'�E�����Everyone here is on the run from Alioth.��|����� Most don't make it.��������pThere's a resistance, though.�� C�u@��'�ؠ����Other people like us that managed to survive.�� ��ۡՁ They're hidin' out in the borderlands, trying to find a way the fuck outta here.���C�u��'�������Then that's where we go.��5������"We?" Us? A team?�������� /The answer is yes. Shake on it.���C�u@��(������Fuck! You nicked it.��⠹����Just got the tip with your little steak knife.��)����� YThese "others" can help us get back to the TVA.���C�u��((F�����Make 'em fix things.�������� �Something funny, bub?��蠵����She might have somethin' to say about that.���C�u��(Bz�����Who's "she?"���������In The Void...��<�����you're either food for Alioth...���C�u��(Z�����or you work for her.���C�u@��)|������Huh. Paul Rudd finally aged.�������� You must be this year's Juggernaut.��_������- Thank you. - I'd keep your voices down.��C�u��)�)�����She don't like the chatter.��e����� She's gonna love you.���C�u��)������Is it... Is that Charles?���������Hey... Hey, Chuck! It's us!��v������That's not Chuck.���C�u��)������Ah, shit.��e����� Oh, ableism. Great.��������qThat's not gonna go over well with the woke mob.�� pC�u��*������A Wolverine.���������I wondered when I'd get one of you.���������You're one of Xavier's.���C�u@��*'W�����You-You know him? You know Chuck?��������YOh, I knew him.��<����� �We shared a womb.��ܠʡāeTried to strangle the sly little fellow with my umbilical cord.�� �C�u@��*H�����Amen. I've never loved roommates. Mine's blind.�� ������ Except she can see cocaine.��_�����_For some... reason.���C�u@��*a���You want to chime in, Your Majesty? I'm dying here.�� ������ ;Who are you?��e�����GCharles Xavier's twin, Cassandra Nova.�� �C�u��*~�����- Bullshit! - I was an anal birth.��_������You two are cute.��������I have a good feeling about this.��5C�u��*�F�����And I've been trying to catch...��e����� this little firefly for years.���������Haven't I, Johnny?��0C�u��*�렿���Aw... You picked the wrong time to make new friends.�� ������ /Oh, Johnny told us all about you.�� C�u@��*�ޠ����- Maybe shut up now. - Yeah, maybe don't...�� ������We're just talkin' here.��;�ʡā �Yeah, Johnny told us you're a psychotic megalomaniacal asshole.�� ^C�u@��*�x�����His words, not mine.������Hellbent on domination and pain.�� G������- You said all that about me? - No!���C�u@��*�Y�ҡ́- No! I don't... I didn't say any of that! - Sticks and stones, Johnny!�� �����^Don't let her intimidate you.���C�u@��+.�����It's like you said in the convoy.��/������This finger-lickin' dead-inside pixie slab of...�� ������third rate dime-store nut-milk...���C�u@��+4�����can eat your delicious cinnamon ring...��������- and kick rocks all the way to bald hell. - Okay.��Р����I have never said any of those words...��)C�u��+K������- in my entire life! - Ha! The modesty.���������People think I'm a shit talker. But this guy...�� ;C�u@��+aN�����Next level.��B������What? This... I... We...��}����� I don't even know what half of that means!����ʡā;- This... I... What? This... - My hat's off to you, sir. Truly.�� �C�u��+}������I didn't... He's... That's...���������I don't...��;C�u@��+�������Not my favorite Chris.����š��;You stupid piece of shit. You just got him fucking killed!�� Ġ�����Hey! We're all grieving!���C�u��+�Ǡ����PS, do you know what he was doing to the budget?���������Alioth is hungry.��*C�u@��+������There's been some kind of mistake.��0������Big yellow is a back up Anchor Being...��������)and I'm Marvel Jesus. MJ, if you're nasty.�� qC�u@��+�T�����This may be hard to hear...���ѡˁ�but there's another British villain who's gonna destroy my universe...�� k������and I'm gonna stop him.���C�u��+���ʡāOh, honey, you don't really strike me as the world-saving type.�� ;C�u��,ՠ����Did I hit a nerve?���������I didn't want it to come to this.�� �����pEither you help us...���C�u��,)��סсor my friend here is gonna sing the entire second act of Music Man...�� ������ 5with zero warm-up.���C�u@��,=������Where'd you get the chair?����¡��_Well, once in a while, I do get a Charles through here.�� Ġ�����Never mine, though.��_C�u��,Tx�����No. He didn't care to find me.�� _������Gen Z and their trauma-bragging!�� �C�u@��,oРǡ��Can't you just stuff it down, turn it into accomplishment...�� ��� �or cancer like the rest of us?��Y������But I'm not like the rest of you.���C�u@��,�������Except maybe the Wolverine.��֠����|Now, we could be truly terrifying together.�� �������You're that scary, huh?���C�u@��,�Ԡ����The TVA certainly thought so.��)����� qThey sent me here before I could walk.��M�ơ���And you know, it's the best thing that ever happened to me.�� kC�u@��,�������I love it here.��������;You live in a garbage dump.�������� �I think we both know who lives in the garbage dump.�� �C�u��,�Z�����The Void is a paradise.��������I can wield my power here without shame.���C�u��,�ʠȡUnfortunately I had no Charles Xavier to teach me temperance.�� ܠ�����What about your Charles?��*C�u��-:�����Did he protect you?��e�����}Did he make you feel safe?��#�����GWe're mutants. We're never safe.��}C�u@��-=�����Whoa, whoa, whoa! I don't... I don't want the smoke.��#�ʡā �I don't have any beef with you. I just want to save my friends.�� AC�u@��-R������I just... I want to go home.��5������Well, the thing is, I could get you home.�������� - Good. - But I don't want to.��/C�u��-f������Not good.�� �����jWhat do you want, Wade Wilson?���C�u@��-������Your... fingers are inside me, but not in a good way.�� /����� �My brother could enter one's mind with a thought.�� �C�u��-�젧���I have to get my hands dirty.�� C�u��-�D�����I've got you.��5������I've got you...��eC�u��-ΐ�����What do you mean?�������� I can't, I can't reach you. You're not here.�� qC�u@��-䳠����I'm right here.��������S- No, you're not. I can't... - I'm right here.�� ����� Then show me. You got to do something.���C�u��.�����Show you what?��k������Show me you care about something bigger than you.�� �C�u��.�á��Ever since they turned you down, you took a knee.��Ϡ����Baby, you never got back up.���C�u@��.You just say it. Okay?�������� �Say, "I don't want you.��A�����|"I don't want to be with you."�� C�u@��.�!�����Go ahead. Say it. Say, say, "I don't..."��6������Say it. You don't wanna be with me.��<�ˡŁ �Tell me that and I'll walk away. Say, "I don't want you."�� C�u��.�Ҡ����Fuck...��A������You'll never fucking matter.�� �C�u��.�ʠ����What?��������$- You'll never fucking matter. - Fucking matter.�� �C�u@��/ 栩���- You'll... - You'll...��S������- never... - never...��_������- fucking... - fucking...���C�u��/"������- matter. - matter...�� 蠞����She never said that.��_C�u��/;������No.��������eBut I bet she thought it.��SC�u��/O������You are so mean!��Y�ȡMy brain could taste your fingers, and they tasted like hate!�� AC�u��/c������And where in God's name is the intimacy coordinator?�� Ġ���� kYou're so lost, Mr. Wilson.���C�u��/x������And long before you came here.��ʠġ���This is Baby Knife. She's gonna fuck you in the face now.�� pC�u��/��ϡɁIf you want to kill me, it's going to take more than a little blade.�� ������ �How about six?��kC�u��/�������My boy's wicked strong.��*����� That's my big boy.�������GYes, you are.��5C�u��/�B�����Well, this has been fun.��/������But the big guy needs to eat and the rent is due.��vC�u��/�᠗���By the way...��A������you're the rent.���C�u��0L�����Come on! Fuck!��*������You comin' or what?��<����� �Coming!��kC�u@��0�&�����What you thinkin' 'bout?��蠡����Get the fuck off of me!������� �Almost done.��k������Almost done what?��<C�u��0�נ����Getting my knife out of your buttocks, pervert!�� G����� �Fuck!��������)Get your mind out of my pants!���C�u@��0�S�����I'm telling Blake.��B������New rules.������� I talk now.��A�ˡŁ- That's gonna be very hard on the audience. - Shut the fuck up!�� XC�u��0򙠟���Let me fuckin' think.��k������Now we gotta get back to Paradox, right?��)C�u��1u�����Right?��A����� �- Am I allowed to speak now or... - Just nod, asshole.�� �C�u@��1$>�����Right.�����߁;Then we find the others that poor kid, Johnny was talking about before you got him killed!�� ������"Poor kid." He's like fifty!��YC�u@��1;1�ӡ́Yeah, if there's a chance they know how to get out of here, we find 'em.�� Ġ̡Ɓ jAnd make those TVA fuckers fix my shit like you fucking promised!�� /C�u��1Sq�����I smell quest.��������vI smell food.���C�u��1t(�¡��So what made you finally wear an honest-to-God costume?�� C�u��1�ڠ����Mine's red so they can't see me bleed.��#������But I could see how yellow would be useful too.�� jC�u��1�������Have you been checked for ADHD?��������Mm-mm.������� �But I've had several STDs, which...��MC�u��1�a�����were probably caused by ADHD.��������SFuck!�������What are you looking for?���C�u@��1�H�����Thank fuck.��蠭����No, no, no. That's rubbing alcohol.���Ρȁ�You don't want to drink... Oh, yeah. There you go. Fuck that liver.�� C�u��1髠����Good. Okay.�������� �What the fuck are those?��eC�u��1�Q�ġ��Back in civilian life, I wear a toupee, but nobody knows.�� �C�u��2D�����Everybody knows.��ܠ�����Wanna talk about what's haunting you, or...���C�u��2.[�����should we wait for a third act flashback?��|����� Go fuck yourself.���C�u��2JY�����You know...��B����� �in my world, you're...���C�u@��2bp�����You're well regarded.��⠢���Yeah, well, not in mine.�� �š���- They don't like me much in mine either. - You don't say.�� �C�u@��2������I wanted to be something, you know. I...��Y����� �Shit, I wanted to be an Avenger.��������- Fuck the Avengers. - Yeah.��)C�u��2������I didn't make the cut, though. Same with the X-Men...��$�����qWhen my girlfriend left me...���C�u@��2�頷���- and then I just... - You had a girlfriend?��e������Yeah.������� �Vanessa.��A�����eWhen we met, she was a dancer.���C�u��2̏�����We had a whole life.��蠖����It was good.��蠡����But, oh, boy, I just...��_C�u��2釠����Fucked that right up.��ܠ���� GBut you.�������You were an X-Man.��eC�u��2�9�����Fuck that. You were the X-Man. You...��)������The Wolverine.���C�u��3������He was a hero in my world.������� �Yeah, well...��AC�u��30�����he ain't shit in mine.���C�u��3J5�����You said, "Logan was a hero." What happened?�� Ġ���� /He died.��B�����_How?��AC�u@��3d@�š��Well, technically, you were chest-fucked by a tree, but...�� Ġȡ kreally, you just ran out of batteries trying to save someone.�� C�u��3yi�����Who?��A�ɡÁ�The shitheels that grew her in a lab called her "X-23." But...�� �C�u��3�렝���she was just a kid.��e�����|A younger, daintier, somehow meaner version of you.�� YC�u@�3�g�����You died trying to save her.��_������It was beautiful.��A����� Look, mijo, I know you're hurtin'.���C�u@��3�N�֡ЁMy blind, elderly, African-American roommate, Blind Al, always says that...��)������pain teaches us who we are.���C�u@��3�G�ϡɁSometimes we need to listen to that pain instead of running from it.�� ������ �- Holy shit. - Yeah, she's wise.���������No, no, no. That's her name? You call her "Blind Al?"�� GC�u��3�򠜡��Well, she's blind.���C�u@��4�Ӡ����Look at you!��⠟����She's coming with us.��蠷��� - No, she's not. Fuck no! - Oh, yes, she is.��S�����- Oh, yes... - Sorry!��}C�u��4�ؠ����Sorry about that!��_������Come here, girl!��e�����#Who are you?���C�u@��4�Z�����Oh, I'm Deadpool.�� ������And I guess you're Deadpool too.�� ����� dBut in here, everybody calls me "Nicepool."���C�u��4�/�ȡOh, my goodness. Wait till you see Ladypool. She is gorgeous.�� ������ 5She just had a baby too. And...��_C�u@��4ݱ�����Can't even tell.��A������I don't think you're supposed to say that.��5����� �That's okay.��A������I identify as a feminist.���C�u��4�Ԡ����Right.��k�ȡ jAre those gold-plated, ...50 caliber Desert Eagle pistoleros?�� �C�u��5 ������'Course.��e������To match my ear huggie.�������� Can I have 'em?��k�����;Over my dead body.��5C�u��5#Z�����You're fun.��k�ġ��And I guess you've already met Mary Puppins. AKA Dogpool.���C�u@��59�����Careful where you put your hands.���á���She's ninety percent g-spot, and she'll let you know it.�� �̡ƁpYou let this little flirt out of your sight for one second and...�� YC�u@��5Wp�����she starts shopping for a new papa.�����߁�If you can't be a responsible pet owner, then maybe you don't deserve this little unicorn.��jC�u@��5r������Guilty on all charges, Your Honor.���������Shan't happen again.��蠞��� /Why are you so nice?��5����� Oh, it costs nothing to be kind.��_C�u@��5�������Shutting the fuck up is also free.��֠���� pThis is Logan.��k�͡ǁ �He's usually shirtless, but he's let himself go since the divorce.�� �C�u��5�$�����Where's your mask?��������Come on, guys.��BC�u@��5Â�����Ugh, this guy.��<������We're looking for a group of survivors.��ܠ���� eOh, they're out there.��A�ޡ؁MYeah, but merc to merc, you better hope that you don't run into the Deadpool corps.�� /C�u@��5ॠ����Yeah, they're crazy.����סсeThey will chop you up into a thousand pieces and hide you all over The Void.�� �������If they could only process their childhood trauma...��)C�u@��5������they'd go on one heck of a healing journey.��/������Look, we're headed for the borderlands.��蠟��� dYou know where it is?����ܡցFYeah, that... That's twelve klicks due west. I can lend you my ride, if you like.��qC�u��6l�����It would be my honor.���C�u��6/k�����No, no, no. Absolutely not.���������Uh-uh. What the... No! No!��S������Just get in the car.���C�u��6DA�����This isn't a car.��;������This is a Honda fuckin' Odyssey.��������)Throttle response sucks a cock.��SC�u@��6Zc�����Dated infotainment system.��e�ˡŁ When Honda saw that untreated chlamydia was makin' a comeback...�� A������they invented the Honda Odyssey to compete.�� �C�u��6u堡���Get in the fucking car.�� ������ �She'll get you there safe and sound.���������Old Betsy always does.���C�u@��6�������You're gonna have to give me my dog back, though.��}������I know. Listen. Yes, child.�� Ġǡ��_If you ever wanna give her up, or if she needs a new home...�� �C�u@��6�*�����or if something should happen to you...��S������I'd love to be her papa.��������vWhat would ever happen to me?��YC�u��6Ơ�����Lots of stuff.��������- Jesus. - No! We're running away.���C�u@��6� �����- Give me that. - The corn was too dense, girl!��������S- There. - Come here!��B����� ;- Fuck! - Hello!���C�u��6������Bye.���C�u@��7g ����Okay, I'm just gonna ask...��蠟���_What's with the suit?�������� �First thing I did when I flamed out...���������- I took mine off. - Drop it.���C�u@��7}>�����It's not that ugly.����ġ��e- Stop talking about my suit. - Did you make it yourself?��/����� ;- Been there. - Quit. Now.����š��jThe X-Men make you wear it? Those sons of fuckin' bitches.�� C�u@��7�Z�����They are not your friends, I'll tell you that.��ܠ�����Friends don't let friends...���ҡ́ leave the house lookin' like they fight crime for the Los Angeles Rams.�� ;C�u@��7�M�����Shut the fuck up about this, or...��;������Whoa, whoa, whoa. Watch your frown lines, angel baby.�����ځ)- I'm just trying to bond a little bit. - Yeah, well, then talk about somethin' else.��wC�u��7ɓ�����Fine.���C�u@��7�'�����Stop it.������� �If they can fix your world...��A�ˡŁ�what's the first thing you're gonna do when you get out of here?��YC�u@��7�̠ơ��Get some rubbing alcohol shots, maybe a wiper fluid chaser?�� 5����� �What did you say?����̡ƁI said when you get back, what's the first thing you're gonna do?��YC�u��8㠢���No, no, no. Before that.��5����� If... they can fix your world?���C�u@��87������What do you mean, "if?"���������- I mean... - You lied to me.��A�Сʁ �You don't have a fucking clue if they can help me fix things, do you?�� �C�u��8O �����No. I, I mean...��;������Fuck! Fuck! I didn't lie!�� 蠵���d- You lied! - No! I made an educated wish!�� kC�u��8s,�����Because I need you.���������This. This is why. Right here.�� �C�u@��8�頴���'Cause if we don't do something, they die.��ܠ����}I don't know anything about saving worlds.��}������And why would I even care?��C�u��8�6�����Because my entire world is right here in this picture.�� d����� /It's only nine people...���C�u��8�۠����and I have no idea how to save it alone.�������� _I know how to fuck people up for money. But you...��#C�u��8������you know how to save 'em!��/����� At least the other Wolverine did.���C�u@��8ᰠ����Fuck! I guess I'm stuck with the worst one.�� p����� Did you say you made...��ʠ�����an educated fucking wish?�� �C�u@��9������They call me "The Merc with the Mouth."��M�ϡɁ�They don't call me "Truthful Timmy, the Blowjob Queen of Saskatoon."��#C�u��9)������One more word.���������Please give me one.���C�u��9Fo�����Gubernatorial.��������}Oh, fuck!��蠯����You know what? You're a fucking joke.���C�u@��9d������No wonder the Avengers didn't take you.��������0Or the X-Men. And they'll take fucking anyone.��M�����qI mean, you are...��_C�u��9{+�����a ridiculous, immature, half-wit moron.�� ֠����GI have never met...���C�u@��9�Š����a sadder...��������_more attention-starved, jabbering little prick...�� G�̡ƁMin my entire life. And that says a lot, 'cause I've been alive...�� XC�u@��9��ȡfor more than two hundred fuckin' years, and I'll tell you...����ԡ΁�that bald chick was right about one thing. You will never save the world!��pC�u@��9�Ƞ����You couldn't even save a relationship...�� Ġ���� kwith a goddamn stripper!��S�¡��dAnd motherfucker, I wish I could say you'd die alone...�� �C�u��9�m�����but it's one of God's best jokes that you can't die...�� e����� except that's on all of us!���C�u��:H�����Oh, you got nothing to say, Mouth?�� �C�u��::������I'm gonna fight you now.��������#Oh, are you?���C�u��:x������Mm. Not talkin' now, are ya?���C�u��:�q�����You dirty bitch.��C�u��:�ߠ����Whoo!��AC�u��;蠕���No, no, no!���C�u��;n1�����Baby Knife!��B������I take it all back. The Honda Odyssey fucks hard.�� C�u��;�Š����Too bad you don't, needle dick.��������YOh, we're just gettin' started, bub.���C�u��;�������Oh, you... Fuck!���C�u��<~T�����Thor!��A�����MWhere are we?���������No clue, but... I like it here.�� AC�u��<������Whoa, whoa, whoa!��)C�u��=�������Okay.��������)Look at you... all. You must be the others.�� C�u@��=�������Terrific.��A������So just to refresh, you are...�� �����:- Wonder... Elektra? Yes. Who could forget? - Elektra.�� GC�u��=���ءҁAnd you. I was not expecting to see you here. I thought you were, you know...��d����� retired.���C�u��=�,�����Retarded?��A����� "Retired."����ɡÁ �I'm already in The Void. I'm not trying to get canceled again.���C�u@��=�������I don't like you.������You never did.��A�ġ�� �And who's this succulent reminder of my own inadequacies?��|C�u@��>������Look at you.��;������You look like the superhero version of Hawkeye.��#�����jThe name's Remy LeBeau, Le Diable Blanc.�� �C�u@��>$������But you can call me the Gambit.����ΡȁeIt's been a while since I've seen Sling Blade. Hit me again.�� ������^They call me the Gambit.���C�u@��>VU�����You know, we never had a Wolverine up in here.����ȡ But I can tell you now, it's just a common courtesy to ask...�� �C�u��>n������before you drink up all of my liquor.���������Well, it's a good thing I don't give a fuck.���C�u��>�������Fuck.��@�����uSo embarrassing.��eC�u@��>�:�աρWell, now that that's settled, look, we came a long way to find you three.�� i����� There's four of us.��������There's four... Hey, wait. Is it Magneto?��SC�u@��>�������Dear sweet God in heaven, let it be Magneto...�� ����� �- because with him... - He's dead.��k����� �Fuck! Now Disney gets cheap?��SC�u��>�m�֡ЁIt's like Pinocchio jammed his face in my ass and started lying like crazy.�� 5����� �Ooh, you nasty!��;C�u��>�������Not a single word. What do you do exactly?�� ������ ;Charge the playing cards and make 'em go boom!�� C�u@��?������Your power's close up magic. That's good.��������MWe're not totally fucked at all.��������|So who brought us here?���C�u��?󠛡��That would be me.���C�u��?F堢���Don't make me regret it.��A����� Holy shit. Logan. That's her. That's X-23.�� eC�u��?`I�����She's the one I told you about.���C�u@��?wᠵ���Hey, how did you all get stuck in The Void?��%������There was a knock at the door.��_������- TVA sent me here. - Me, too.��}C�u@�?�ԠɡÁWell, maybe I was born here. It's, it's hard to know for sure.��x����� �TVA decided our universe was dying.���C�u��?�D�����And I never even got a chance to fight for it.��S�����fPeople like us don't go quietly.��#C�u��?�t�����TVA knows that, so they took us out.��)����� �The answer is yes. I'm in.��Р����d- In what? - A team.���C�u@��?�������Me, you, you, and me. All of us together.��S������Let's get the fuck out of this place.��:�ѡˁ �- Don't listen to him. He's a fucking liar! - It was an educated wish!�� YC�u��?�@�����Look.��C����� HWe've been inside Cassandra's lair.��������The only way out of The Void is through her.�� �C�u@��@������She can get us home. She told us.��֠����|Wait a minute, you've been inside?��������- And you made it out alive? - Bullshit.���C�u@��@.-�����- Nobody's ever done that. - We did.��/������Every time one of us has gone up against her...��ʠ����Athey die.��AC�u@��@Dy�����The Punisher, The Quicksilver, The Daredevil.�� ������ ;Daredevil? I'm so sorry.��6�����- It's fine. - Okay.���C�u��@c�����Even that sweet, baby angel, Johnny Storm.�� ������ �He up and gone missing like...��C�u@��@vĠ����what, two days ago?��蠝����Ugh. That's so sad.��������Wherever this Johnny fella is, I'm sure he's thriving.�� �C�u@��@�.�ǡ��Look, there's, there's strength in numbers. All right? Us...�� ����� �plus, you guys. We can put Cassandra...��_������over our knee and force her to let us out of The Void.��MC�u@��@�٠����I know what it means to feel self-doubt.��0������- I don't feel that at all. - I'm good.�������� Gnawing at your gut like a coked-up tapeworm.��|C�u@��@������It's like you're holding up a mirror to my soul.����¡��)You guys may not have been able to save your universes.�� A�����But you can avenge them.���C�u��@�ݠ����It's what Johnny would have wanted.��_�����Wait. You knew Johnny?�� jC�u@��@�5�����Oh, yeah.��������6Dickhead here talked him into a team up...��)����� and Johnny came down with a little case of the deads.�� GC�u@��A (�����No, no, no. We don't know that.��⠻����It was just a flesh wound. He may have survived.��M�����}If he survived that, he is prayin' for death.�� C�u@��A&c�����- Thank you, Doctor Wolverine! - Spill it!��󠧡�� �What'd you do to Johnny, huh?���������Talk or I'm gonna start dealin'.���C�u��A:������Okay. Okay. Hey, hey, hey.��������SLook.��A����� ;He ran his fat-ass mouth about Cassandra.���C�u@��AO������Then she zip-zapped his skin...����¡��Sleaving his organs to splash crudely onto the ground...����ġ���while the soil greedily drank his blood. It was horrible.�� �C�u��Aj�����He was like a brother to me.��5�¡���Look, he died before he could make a difference. But...�� �C�u��A~�����Look, maybe you couldn't save your worlds, but...�� ����� �but Jesus Christ, you can save mine!�� �C�u@��A�u�����I don't give a shit about your world, but...�� ��š�� Aif these two made it out of there alive, maybe together...�� eC�u@��A� ����we can get back in. And take her down.��Y�¡���Where I come from, we call that suicide, Chère.�� �Ρȁ�If we can block her psychic powers, we can get a leg up. I know it.��}C�u@��Aʜ�����Now I know Magneto's dead.�������$But I'd venture to guess that his helmet...��|�͡ǁG- is lying around here somewhere... - Cassandra melted the helmet.�� GC�u@��A�Ѡ����- Fuck! - After she killed him.��e����� Fuck!�������� GShe don't play.���ԡ΁ She knows that helmet was the only way to protect anyone from her powers.�� eC�u@��A��ġ��The only other helmet that strong is Juggernaut's, but...�� �ơ�� �- he works for Cassandra. - Juggernaut's helmet. That's it.��$�ġ���Yeah, and we done be knowing that lid ain't comin' off...��C�u@��B�Сʁ- without that dome gonna come off wit'it. - I'm so sorry, beautiful.���̡Ɓ �I want this to be gentle. Who is your dialect coach? The Minions?�� C�u��B.b�����I feel like we are missing critical exposition here.�� ������I'm sick of this shit. I'm sick of hiding.�� �C�u@��BN���Let's face it, our worlds forgot about us.��}�����$Or never learned about us.��Y�����#The heroes we were.�� C�u��BcŠ����Lives we saved.��e����� Or wanted to save.�������� dMaybe these two are our chance.���C�u��B|�����To be remembered.��;�����The way we deserve.��;������Yes.��������5An ending.���C�u@��B�9�����- Legacy. - Yes!��e����� Yes! Let this man cook.��/����� �This is what I'm talking about.��⠬���kBig slow-motion fights, sad music.��)C�u@��B�t�֡ЁEverybody working together. Who knows if you live or die? That sorta thing.�� ������ 5- Who's ready? - I was born ready.���C�u@��B������Yes! Gambit?���̡Ɓ�I ain't know my daddy, but I'm sure I shot out of his dick ready.�� e������Jesus Christ, that is graphic.���C�u@��B�6�š��Yeah. He was layin' them buttery nuts all up in my mama...��S������and I shot out there and I said, "What's up, Doc?"��������;Johnny must have loved you. X-23, what's it gonna be?�� �C�u@��B�d�����The name's Laura.��蠲����- Let's fucking go. - Let's fucking go!�� ;�����p- It's on like chicken and corn. - Yeah!��YC�u��CԠ����- We're doing this. - You're all fuckin' dead.��}�����#My God! Read the room.���C�u��CQf�¡��Hey, hey. I'm not lookin' for company. Get out of here.�� eC�u@��Cek�����You remind me of him.��������Angry. Drunk. Mean...�������� �- Sounds like a great guy... - Wasn't finished.���C�u��C�������Showed up when it mattered the most.��ܠ�����Couldn't help it.��/C�u��C�堧���You might not know it, but...�������� qyou're a good man, Logan.��eC�u��C�ؠơ��You might not know it, but apparently, I'm the worst Logan.�� ������5I got to have a life because of you.��YC�u��Cᛠ����I got to grow up because of you.��������RA lot of kids did.��<C�u��C�à����A lot of kids didn't grow up because of me.��}�����GTrust me, kid, I'm no hero.���C�u��Do�����That suit says different.��������MYeah. Do you like it?���C�u��D*\�����Scott used to beg me to wear it.��Y�����vSo did Jean, Storm, Beast.�� �C�u��DK㠖���All of them.��������They wanted me to be part of the team, but I wouldn't.�� �C�u��DcS�����Told 'em they all look fucking ridiculous. I mean...�� 5C�u��Dw������I couldn't have 'em thinkin' I wanted to be there.�� �C�u��D��ʡāAnd then one day, while I was off on my own, the humans came...�� ������#and went mutant hunting.�� C�u��D�I�����I can guess the rest.��<������No, no, let me...��B������Let me say it. I...���C�u��Dο�����I need to say it.����ϡɁ�By the time I stumbled home shitfaced from the bar, it was too late.�� 5C�u��D�������They were dead. Every...���C�u��E�����This suit's all I got to remind me of who they were.�� ������^And what I did.��kC�u��EdР����We're headed to Cassandra's at sunup.�������� �Have fun. Not my fight.���C�u��E�?�����We won't pull this off without you.��_C�u��E������Hey. Whoever you think I am, you got the wrong guy.�� 5C�u��E�ݠ����You were always the wrong guy.��eC�u��F'������What?��A������Alioth didn't get them.�������� XCassandra wanted to play with them herself first.���C�u@��F>B�����They got away.��B������- Did they find the others? - No.��Y����� �Good. All right. Phew.��������GThe others found them.��C�u@��FSA�á��Oh, very cute. Well done, Pyro. Classic bait and switch.�� A����� �- You really got me there. - Relax.���C�u@��Fg������If they come after Nova, she'll handle it.��󠫡�� �Cassandra is a lunatic wild card.��������:Why do you think we put her there in the first place?��YC�u@��F�u�����Thank God she's never chosen to leave The Void.��������MThe Time Ripper is hours away from completion.�� �������I cannot take any chances.��eC�u@��F�b�����Well, maybe not.��������But I can.��;����� �For a price.�������� �Why do you have to say it in that silly voice?���C�u@��F�������It's so icky.��;������You want it done or not?��A������All right. Your price.��A����� �Take her out.���C�u��F�頗���Ugh. Mutants.��C�u@��G������Ooh! Look at that there!��;�ܡց�You see them biggum hands come closed. Ain't not a wonna gettin' up inside there.�� ������I think what Gambit's trying to say is...���C�u@��G5T�����getting Juggernaut's helmet ain't gonna be easy.�� ������ ;I'm just making stuff up at this...��Y�����;- Yeah. Tilt up to Blade. - Gun!���C�u@��G`ɠ����Where'd he get that little beauty?���������That's Punisher's AT4.��#�����MWhich Punisher? There's been like five of them.���C�u��Gx������There's only been one Blade...�� �����Sand there's only ever gonna be one Blade.��|C�u��G�&�����Incoming!���C�u@��H�I�����Ooh, this is gonna be good.��w����� You know how long I've been waiting for this?��ʠ�����Whoo! I'm about to make a name for myself here.��wC�u@��H�������I don't think you guys walk away from this.��*�á���You just make sure people know what happened here today.��Рǡ��GAnd when you get out of here, you have a drink for me, yeah?���C�u@��HԈ�����You just stay on our six and get inside.�� ����� �We'll make sure you get the package.��}�����5And we'll get our ending.�� C�u��I�������And boom!��C�u��J~������Some motherfuckers still trying to ice skate uphill.��MC�u��J�r�����You two escaping, I could live with.��}������But coming back? Willingly?�� jC�u��J�)�����Boys are so silly.��֠����}I just need to get home.��e����� �Well, that's not on the menu, I'm afraid.���C�u��J�L�����It's death or enslavement. À la carte, of course.�� ������ YUpsy-daisy.���C�u��J�V�����Finally...��k�����it's nice to give someone else a chance to talk.��S����� Not my strong suit.���C�u��KS^�����You shouldn't have done that.���C�u��K�5�����You are an interesting one, aren't you?�� q����� �I do feel like you get lost behind all of his...��wC�u��K؁�����Deadpools are a dime a dozen here in The Void.�� Ġ���� �But you...��_C�u��K�V�����What's going on in here?�� �C�u��L-������Interesting...��e������Not what I expected back here.��|C�u��LB������Behind the anger.���C�u��LWu�����You're hiding.���������From them.��A����� �From all the ones you let down.���C�u��Lu>�����So much pain.���������I walked away.��kC�u��L������They called after me and I...��������I walked away.��������SI always do.��YC�u��L�T�����- Logan! - I know.�������� 5That's not all you did.�� ������Is it?���C�u��LǙ�����You found them.��_����� GThe X-Men.���C�u��L�񠏡��Dead.��蠚����Piled like wood.���C�u��M������What did you do?��������#I started killing.���C�u��M���And I couldn't stop. I didn't wanna stop.�� Ġ�����All those bad men.�� C�u��MCv�����It's not just the bad ones.��/����� �My little animal.���C�u��M_񠺡��And I turned the whole world against the X-Men.�� 蠐��� _Blade!���C�u��M������Just once...�������� _I wanna be the man that Charles thought I was.�� �C�u��M� �����Logan...��e����� �in The Void you can be what you are.��SC�u��M�d�����I just wanna be free.���������I can set you free.���C�u��M�I�����I can silence all those voices.��C�u��N-������I've got you.��蠗���)I've got you.���C�u��NB������No.��B������I got you.��C�u��Nqޠ����Get it off!��Y�ϡɁYou're gonna send us home, or I'm gonna twist your fucking head off.�� 5C�u��N�������Why are you laughing?��;�ǡ���I can't send you home unless you get this thing off my head.���C�u@��N�������And as soon as you do that...��e�š�� I'm going to boil your brains on an atomic level whilst...�� ;������flicking my bean to the Enya box set.�� C�u@��N�R�����There's an Enya box set?��������Either you kill me...��⠘��� Aor I kill you.��e������Both wonderful options.��C�u@��N�W�����You want me to do it?��A����� No, I'll do it.��k����� I have her neck right here. It's really no problem.���������You'll screw it up.���C�u��N������Oh, come on, Mr. PG-13, except the last one!�� ��� YWhat the fuck?��;C�u��O1�����You have no idea what it's like!��ʠ���� pDay after day. Shovel the shit.�� eC�u��O������Fetch the meats.��5������I have spent my entire...���C�u@��O2砥���Not everyone gets a speech.��ܠ���� �She's gonna die.��蠶���Okay. Hey, hey. If I take this helmet off...���C�u@��OKQ�����- do you promise you won't kill us? - Fuck!��������I promise...��B����� �I will kill you first thing.�������5Why are you like this?���C�u@��Od�����I wish I knew.��⠖����Take it off.��k����� �- What? - Take it off.��k����� �- Why? - Just take it off.��B�ġ���- This is our only chance to fix our shit! - Take it off!�� �C�u��O�ݠ����I am wearing this suit.��⠽��� �And that means a lot of things, but most of all...��MC�u��O�������it means I'm an X-Man.��e������And I know your brother.���C�u@��O������As much as I want to fucking kill you...��ܠ�����every bone in my body wants to fucking kill you...�� Ġ�����he would not let me stand here and watch you die!�� �C�u��O�P�����Take your hands off.�������� ;This is for him.���C�u��O�ꠞ���This is for Charles.���C�u��P#M�����Hey, no, no, no! Don't you dare do me like Johnny!�� AC�u��PFK�����My brother loved you.��;����� �He loved all of us.��<C�u��Pb �����Must be nice.��;������He would've loved you, too.�� C�u@��P{�����If he knew about you...�������� �if he knew where you were...��ܠ͡ǁhe would've torn a hole in the fucking universe to bring you home.�� �C�u��P�󠚡��This is my home.��;�����wWell, then at least let us save his.���C�u��P�z�����You want to hear something crazy?��ܠ���� �An amateur magician rolled through here a while back.�� ;C�u��P�̠����I killed him, of course.��������wWore his skin around for four days.���C�u��P������But...��A������I found this...�������� little trinket...��)������on his lovely fingers.��MC�u��Q������Strange!���������- Marvel sparkle circle. - What is that?��MC�u��Q2u�����This is your way home.��}�Ρȁ$I do owe you for saving my life. But let's keep things interesting.�� �C�u��QH ˡŁI'd say you have about four seconds before you're Alioth's food.�� �C�u��Qh������Race ya.��BC�u@��R�i�����{\an8}And as I said we've got a standard three-year...��/������{\an8}bumper to bumper warranty.�� ����� �Glad you gave us a second chance.���C�u��R�n�ݡׁAnd don't worry. Wade and I are a team, so I'll see he gets half the commission...�� �C�u��R�[�����That feels like a Kia.�������� GIt's a fucking Kia Carnival, isn't it?��YC�u��R�N�����Holy shit. That's Deadpool.�� ����� �And that's Wolverine.��e������You're damn straight it is.��;C�u@��S ������Fox killed him.����ӡ́;Disney brought him back. They're going to make him do this 'til he's 90.�� ���FLet's go.���C�u��S"�����I'll clock you out!��<������Forever!�������� /Forever.���C�u��SO������Wakey-wakey.��������_God?��蠶���Now you put all these bullets in my belly...�� �C�u��Sml�����and I'm gonna find out why.�������vI'll just say it.��_C�u��S������You don't have to stick your fingers in me.���������Jesus, just ask sometimes.��ʠ�����Fine.��C�u��S�������Really?��蠛����Hands in pockets.��⠜���jGuy named Paradox.���C�u@��S�E�����He said he'd get me out of The Void.��⠭����All I know is he works for the TVA.������� /The TVA.��蠞����We had an agreement.��C�u��S�8�����I don't think this guy cares.������� He will.�������Hey, people!��C�u@��S殠����How much longer before the Time Ripper is active?��M������We're running the final safety checks.��*������Okay. All right. Thanks for all your hard work, Ralph.���C�u@��S�������- Take your time. - Really?��_�����No, you drooling boob!������� �No! We have company.��<������Cancel the safety checks. We need to be live now!�� �C�u��TX�����I hate you so much.��������RNo! Stop!��蠤����Piss off! You're too late.��/C�u@��T8�����- You're fuckin' done. - Why was Thor crying?��֠����}How dare you!��蠪��� No one comes back from The Void.��wC�u��TM8�����Tell that to Cassandra Nova.���C�u��Tuk�����Paradox. We have a problem.������� Paradox.���C�u@��T�L�����Well, you are doughier than you looked in Pyro's head.�� ������ AYou tried to kill me.��������vI literally have no...���C�u��T�i�¡��You come for the king, you better kill the king.��R������Welcome to the skull fuck club, Paradox.�� GC�u��T�>�����You know she doesn't wash that hand.��M�����#What's this?��eC�u@��T�������A Time Ripper?��5������- Naughty boy. - Oh, no. We're on it.�������� /We're gonna head down and dismantle that thing now.��YC�u@��T�*�����We got ya, boo. You just keep playing those keys.��󠥡�� �I don't want to destroy it.��ܠ����I want to use it.��5C�u��U������Now, shoo. Mummy and Daddy are having a conversation.�� �C�u@��U3������You know, the funny thing is...��������I was happy in The Void.��������jYou sent your trash to me. Alioth and I cleaned it up.�� eC�u��UP������Everyone was happy.����á�� And then you had to go and piss on my side of the fence.�� C�u@��Uh������And so now the fence must come down.��w����� ;I'm going to use your little Time Ripper.��)����� And I'm going to destroy this universe...�� C�u��U�������and the next and the next and the next...�� ������ ;until all that's left is The Void.�� �C�u@��U�i�����And I get to play God.��S����� qCome on.���͡ǁ#Now you're going to show me how to use this fancy gadget of yours.�� C�u��U�D�֡ЁAnd don't worry, I've called some friends to make sure we're not disturbed.�� /C�u@��U�r�ɡÁSorry to bother, madam, but there's something you need to see.�� �ޡ؁ We're getting indications of an unsanctioned Time Ripper activating on Earth-10005.���C�u��U������Whose district is that?��������0Paradox.���C�u@��V3ߠ����Well, thank you so much for your help, darling.�������� GGod. Good to get out of that head.�� q�����^What a mess!���C�u��Vi������Stop!��A�����5Let's give it a beat for the extras to clear.��Р���� �Go, go, go! Oh, my God!���C�u��V������- Oh. My. God. - Fuck.�� kC�u��V�͠����It's her!��_����� ACome on, girl!��eC�u��V�k�����Come on, girl!���C�u@��W$ ����That's my girl!��e�š�� We don't have to be apart ever, ever again. Never, ever...�� ܠ�����- Sorry! - Fuck!��;C�u@��W?𠬡��What's Café Gratitude doing here?��������Sorry about that.��⠼��� /Tremble not, sweet Mary Puppins. I'll handle him.�� C�u@��W\������Come here, girl. Papa's here.��������Hey, do not insult this animal's autonomy.�� p������She can decide who her papa is.���C�u@��Wv#�����What's it gonna be, girl, huh?��������Original recipe or Van Milder here?�� Ġ�����That's funny. I can gently tap the fourth wall too.�� ;C�u@��W�?�����The Proposal.�������� eThe fuck was that?���ơ���- Bitch, you think that's what I do? - Both of you shut up.��vC�u��W�������You smell somethin'?��蠔����Yeah, you.��A����� ;A lot of you.��0C�u��W�.�����Told you there were a lot of Deadpools over there.���C�u��X5�����That's bad.���C�u@��X�������I take it they're not friendly.��������5Goodness, no.��k����� GSorry about this, boys. Mission over.���������Cause of death, one hundred kill-thirsty Deadpools.�� kC�u@��X�y�����They're dumb.��<������But they can fight. Not me, though.��֠ơ�� _Would love to get in the mix but I have low bone density...���C�u��X������and I have to keep my face safe.��ܠ���� �- Hold, please. - Oh, God.��蠚���)All right. Look.���C�u��Xٛ�����Guys!��蠞����Deadpool Prime here.��֠����- Our fight isn't with you... - Hey!���C�u@��X��ҡ́When I want your opinion, I'll take Wolverine's dick out of your mouth.��)������That's Kidpool. She's the dirtiest.��/C�u@��Y������Can we just be done?��⠥����We're just getting started.������� 5No, no, no. With the whole multiverse thing.�� �C�u��Y"\�����It's not great.��蠠����It's just been miss...�������� after miss...��ܠ�����after miss.���C�u@�Y= �ġ��Look, The Wizard of Oz did the multiverse first...�� ����� �and they did it best. The gays knew it.���C�u@��YQ������But we didn't listen.��⠬����Let's just take the L and move on.�� �������I think it's been steadily great since Endgame.�� C�u@��YlA�����What are you talking about?��������YThe multiverse is over.�������� �Cassandy gonna destroy the fuck outta every timeline.�� ;C�u@��Y�Ԡ����- Y'all can't do shit about it. - Do you not get it?����ơ�� �If we don't go down to the subway and stop her, we all die.���������Say, the boss lady don't want no disturbances.���C�u@��Y�&�š��You wanna get down to the subway, you gotta go through us.�� ������ ;Uzi time, baby.��������Uzi time, baby.���C�u��Y�Ҡ����Look alive!���C�u@��Yެ�����- I think I'm hit. - No shit.��������*You did that on purpose.�������� eI did no such thing!�������Listen to me, gorgeous.���C�u��Y�L�����How long does it take for you to regenerate?��⠕����Regenerate?���C�u@��Z������You really are God's perfect idiot, aren't you?��������- I'm okay. - How dare you!��_����� �You insensitive son of a bitch!��}C�u@��Z-Ơ����How was I supposed to know he doesn't regenerate?��}�����$I'm not a medicine woman.��e�����SLook. A donut cart.���C�u@��ZA������- They're practically hospitals. - What?��;������- They sell portable triage units. - They don't.��)����� �- I'm gonna get you to safety. - He's not.�������^Deep breath.���C�u@��ZzF�����Hey, why are we stopping?��Р����vI'm just catching my breath.�������� �What, are your legs on vacation? You're dead weight!�� C�u��Z�٠����That's because I'm paralyzed.��0������We all have problems. Listen to me.��Р����MYou're gonna live.���C�u��Z�s�����Look at me, Nicepool.���C�u��Z�ˠ����You're gonna live.��������SSay it!��⠙���SI'm gonna live.��5C�u��Z�w�����Say it with me. You're gonna live.���������I'm gonna live!��wC�u��Z�à����Say it louder!���������I'm gonna live...���C�u��[Ǡ����Hold your fire!��蠝��� Sweet little puppy.�� C�u@��[V)�����God damn it! I don't think he's gonna make it.�� ������ AGod, he loved his face.��$����� I can taste his final thought.�� GC�u@��[s"�����He was so afraid.��������But he died a hero.�������� He died from murder, you dumb fuck.��}�����5And all I have to remember him by...���C�u��[��̡Ɓare these two gold-plated, ...50 caliber Desert Eagle pistoleros.��S�����This is for him.���C�u��[�7�����Are you ready?���������I get to kill a hundred yous?��֠����SFuck yeah, I'm ready.���C�u��[�~�����Hey, you don't want to see this, bub.�� ������That's a good girl.�� C�u��\Yp�����Holy shit.��_�����You save the good stuff for special occasions?��#������Killing mostly.���C�u@��\mɠ����What's the wind resistance on those blowjob handles?�� �����)I'm sorry. I'm just a catty bitch when I'm jealous.�� �C�u��\�J�����All right, let's do this.��⠙���YMaximum effort.���C�u��]/N�����You're dead.��<C�u��]�������Motherfucker.��⠝���vI wish I were deaf.��YC�u��]�栯���I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die.��)������I don't wanna...��C�u@��^6*�����Come on.��������5I blew it.���á�� �After all that, the only thing they're gonna remember...��������dis that God awful dismount!���C�u��^b�����What you laughing at, you little fucker?��ܠ����)Uh-oh.��e����� 5Uh-oh.��C�u��^�Ӡ����I guess these ones regenerate.��/�����|Come on. We don't have time for this.�� GC�u��^�=�����Deadpools!��������Stand down.��<C�u��^�5�����This Deadpool's with me.��ܠ�����Oh, no.�������� �Holy shit.��������@That's fuckin' Peter!���C�u@��^ﶠ����Wait, you... You guys know Peter?��)������You kidding me? Every Deadpool has a Peter.��M�ġ���Shit. Peter's a goddamn legend in every Deadpool's world.�� �C�u��_ �����Peter-san.��;C�u��_4�����Peter. Peter. Peter.��#C�u��_SϠ����Enjoy my Peter.��C�u@��_�j�ɡÁOh, now you're here. Oh, well, you're too late. It's all over.�� ������ ANot yet, it's not.��B�����)Whoa. No, no, no. We're very close.���C�u@��_ڽ�����Homestretch, folks. Promise.��5������Quick, let's up the stakes.��ܠ���� ^If she steals the Time Ripper's energy...��6�ġ��:she has the power to shred the fabric of all realities...�� �C�u��_�8�����until there is nothing left but The Void.��Y�����How do we shut it down?�������� _I don't know.���C�u@��`�����How about now?��;������The mask is really intimidating, huh?��5����� �It's like Batman, except he can move his neck.��Р����4Okay, look, look, look.���C�u@��`,q�����The Ripper is fed from a secure chamber below ground.�� G�ۡՁ �It is powered by twin matter and anti-matter feeds converging inside the device.��C�u@��`G#�����Now, Cassandra Nova...��e�ѡˁ is redirecting the Ripper's power to eliminate all timelines...��w�����)starting with this one.��蠮����Theoretically, you could stop her...��6C�u@��`_������by short-circuiting the feeds in the chamber below.��*�ǡ���One of you were to create a circuit between the two feeds...�� G������then the released power would destroy the machine.�� �C�u@��`~������- But, well, but... - Come on, man.��������If you're not gonna swallow, spit it out.��Р����Whoever formed the bridge would be annihilated.�� �C�u@��`�H�ӡ́- I could live with that. - Yeah, I could live with that, too, actually.��Y�����You know, we survive anything. We're like cockroaches.��������SNot this time.���������This is matter and anti-matter.�� kC�u��`�蠲���They do not play nicely with each other.��|�����#When they mix in your body you will be atomized.�� �C�u@��`������Trust the laws of physics if you don't trust me.��Р����wEven if you lived long enough to make the circuit...��������you will die down there.�� �C�u@��aL �����Hold off. Hold.��6������You heard that asshole upstairs.��ܠ���� _Even if we pull this off, we're dead. Permanently.���C�u��aj������That's why it's got to be me.��������What?��AC�u��a�ꠖ���Look, man...��A�����#you didn't ask for any of this.��֠�����You were right.��eC�u��a�`�����I lied.��������SI lied right to your face...���������just to get you to help me. And you did.��SC�u��a����You didn't lie.�������� �You made an educated wish.��_C�u��a�ڠ����Come on.��B������You got a whole world to go back to.���C�u��a�������I got nothin'.��A����� _I got nothin'.��AC�u��b �����Give me this.��AC�u��b*_�����Hey.���C�u��b@������I waited a long time for this team up.��*�����You know something?���C�u��b\������You were the best Wolverine.���C�u��b������Say hi to your friends for me.��C�u��b�:�����No!��<������Open the door!�������� GI can't hear you over all the noble sacrifice.�� AC�u��b�i�����Why are you fucking doing this?��e����� Because I'm Marvel Jesus.�� 5C�u��b�V�����Or Spock.��蠖����Hard to say.���C�u��c�����Wade!��A�����/You fucking idiot!���C�u��c(�����Sorry, I'm just stalling.��e����� I think I'm nervous about dying.��������AThis should be me.��eC�u@��c@������Say hi to my friends for me, peanut.��������*Wade!��蠽��� �You want to be an annoying prick, do it this side!���C�u��cT࠴���You're gonna die in there, you dumb fuck!���C�u@��cx1�����Hey! You don't need to do this.��������$I'm not doing it 'cause I need it.��Y������I'm doing it because they do.���C�u��c�^�����No!���C�u��d4ՠ����He's not gonna make it.���C�u��d\������It's over.��<C�u��ehs�����The Wolverine.��5����� qHe's a hero in my world.���C�u��e�נ����Whoever you think I am, you got the wrong guy.�� Ġ�����You were always the wrong guy...���C�u��e�|�����till you weren't.��Y�����SWade.���C�u��e�(�����Wade. You can finally, finally, matter.���C�u��f ������Vanessa.��蠥��� �I wanna see Vanessa.��)C�u��f7��ǡ��For the first time in my life, I am proud to wear this suit.��pC�u��fM!�����It means I'm an X-Man.��������FI am the X-Man.��0C�u��g������Paradox.������� /You've been busy.��������_Well, somebody had to be.��C�u@��g'������We had some strange readings from this location.����ӡ́MYou wouldn't know anything about an unsanctioned Time Ripper, would you?�� �C�u@��g>��ΡȁNo. No. I wouldn't know anything about an unsanctioned Time Ripper.�� 5����� �Maybe you should ask Cassandra Nova.��ܠ����_Because I was assured...���C�u@��gV������that she was safely held in The Void. But no...�� Ġ���� kshe was here. And she fondled my brain.�������� How did you let this happen?���C�u��gmݠ����You weren't involved at all?��k�����In stopping her, yes! Yes. I was.�� Ġ����}But, not nearly enough.��C�u��g������Not as much as the men who went down there after her.�������� ;My men.��;�����dMy friends.���C�u@��g�۠����I warned them.�����ځeThat they would be completely obliterated if they went. But they went anyway. Like...�� _C�u��g�������Like heroes.��<����� �Because that's who they were.���C�u��g�䠬���They just did what they had to do.�������� With no concern for their own safety.��/C�u��g�נءҁThe fact that we are all still standing here is a testament to their heroism.���C�u��h �ʡāAnyway, there's nothing you or I can do to bring them back now.�� G�����pHe has risen, baby girl.���C�u��h3򠏡��Fuck!��C�u��h�5�����Found your new Anchor Being.���������And we're doing just fine, you piece of shit.���������Mm. Mm-hmm.��;C�u��h�۠����Fine indeed.����á��YAll right. Put your greasy tits away, you preening slut.���C�u@��h�?�����I don't understand.��_�����How are you two still alive?�������� ;You were right. One of us would have been killed.��#C�u@��h�D�����But you put a Deadpool and a Wolverine together...�� ������ 5make 'em hold hands while listening to Madonna...��#C�u@��h�C�����indestructible, motherfucker.��#����� Let's get this Deadpool Variant back to The Void.��������^- Wait, hold on. What? - Nope. Actually...��*C�u@��h�q�����This one's homegrown, like me.��������He belongs here.��;����� �And you are?���������Peterpool. But you can call me Peter.�� �C�u��i������And I hope that you do.��C�u@��i5�����What the fuck is happening here?��������/You are under judgment...�������� Yfor operating an unsanctioned Time Ripper.��SC�u@��iJm�����- Take him. - I was just doing what...��<������you don't have the guts to do.��_����� YGet your insolent hands off me!���C�u��ia �����Get off!��A�����#I'm grateful, gentlemen.���������Let's hold the bows.��<C�u@��iw֠����You led an Omega-level mutant to this timeline.�� q����� - You're welcome. - And you...��/�¡���- shouldn't even be near this timeline. - He's welcome.��SC�u��i�:�����And you look damn good in that suit.�� ������ YI'm so sorry.���C�u��i������I wanna show you something. Something huge.��)������That's what Scoutmaster Kevin used to say.��|C�u��iд�����Do you see that?��蠨����Your universe is regenerating.��֠����AWhatever you did here...��5C�u��i�ˠ����you not only saved your world.��S����� qYou spared your timeline from extinction.�� GC�u��j������I'd rest up.��;�á���I have a feeling your work is only just getting started.�� G������Till you're 90.��C�u��j������Wait!��B�ȡ�We couldn't have made it out of The Void without some help...�� �C�u@��j/ ����from some people that the world kind of forgot.��#�ϡɁIs there any way that you could maybe find a way to bring them home?�� /C�u@��jV+�����I'll see what I can do.��;�����)And I promised my friend here...��S�ʡāthat the TVA could undo some pretty awful shit in his timeline.�� �C�u��jtĠ����What would you say to that?�������� Change the past?������� �Well, he did help me save the world.���C�u��j�F�����And his past made him the man who did it.�� ����� YThere's nothing to fix, Mr. Wilson.���C�u��j������Logan.��������Shawarma?��C�u��j�������- I could eat. - Yeah.��BC�u��j�B�����You know, the Avengers discovered shawarma.�������� �They'd be lucky to have you.��YC�u@��kF�����- Oh. - Oh, come on.��Р����vFuck off!���ˡŁCome here, my little cunchkin. Yes, it's you. You're a survivor.��dC�u��k=J�����Oh, all is right in the world.�������� Yes, it is.���C�u��kT=�����So what are you gonna do next?�������� �I'll figure it out. I always do.���C�u��kj_�����All right.��B�����wSo I'll probably see you around?���C�u��k�j�����Probably not.��A������See you, bub.��AC�u��kŮ�����Logan.���C�u@�k�N�����Al. I'm back.���������About damn time.��⠖���#You holdin'?��A����� I'm all outta devil's dandruff...���C�u@��k�ՠš��- and I'm shaking like an angry vibrator. - Thank you, Al.�� ������ ;We have company.��k�����Althea, this is...���C�u@��l������This is Logan.��������Nice to meet you, Logan.������� qNice to meet you, too.��A�¡�� YAnd this little ancient anal shit-knot is Mary Puppins.�� �C�u��l4������Or as I like to call her, Dogpool.�������� �You want to treat yourself to a little stroke?���C�u@��lK%�š��- Get the tongue. There it is. - Oh, my God! Motherfucker!�� �š�� �Right? It's like an armadillo fucked a gremlin, angrily...��}C�u��lfР����in a bed of gonorrhea...�� ������- Wow. - ...and didn't stop till the sun came up.�� GC�u@�lzՠ����Everyone wants to matter.��0�̡Ɓ �Turns out that you don't need to be Marvel Jesus to do it.�� AC�u@��l��¡��You just need to open your eyes and look around.��ʠ���� �And if you're lucky...��蠫���^you'll find a few friends.���C�u��l�͠����Old friends...��e�����Mand some new ones too.���C�u��l�+�����Give me the fucking dog. Talk to the girl.���C�u��l�������Well, hi.��e����� Hi.��A�����_You've been busy.���C�u��m!������I did it for you.��ܠ���� �And even if you don't want me, I did it for you.���C�u@��m]������It turns out...��蠬����I am the world-saving type.��_������Just look around this table if you want proof.���C�u@��my�����And the best part?��������|Sometimes the people we save...��֠����dwell, they save us right back.��wC�u��n.�����You're not the only one with gifts.��M������What is this place?���C�u��n�ؠ����Nice suit.��B������Zip it, Stan Lee.��kC�u@��n��á��{\an8}I really like the, the art in the Deadpool comics.�� �ʡā �You know, I just always felt a kind of a kinship to him.���C�u��n������And I just thought, I'd like to play that guy someday.�� �C�u@��of�ġ��I was there for three weeks before I shot a single thing.�� Ġ���� e{\an8}At our first day of shooting...��������I was so nervous, man.���C�u@��o�������Everyone was sort of going, "Who's this guy?"��$������You know, there was a lot of that and...��*�ڡԁ�you know, "Is he gonna deliver or not?" You can feel all that kind of pressure.�� �C�u��o������It's always the suit's fault. Never the actor.�� �C�u��o������- This is... - The only way.��_C�u��o�?�����So this is what it feels like.��}�����kAnd there's the lights.��YC�u��p������For medical research.��⠣���S- Bye-bye, video. - Bye.��}C�u��t٠ΡȁI'm tired of these absolutely vile rumors that I got Johnny killed.��#�����^Let's look at the tape.��C�u��t!�����In The Void...��������_you're either food for Alioth...������� or you work for her.��eC�u@��t>ʠ����Go on, Johnny.���������And I'll tell you who "her" is.��e����� Cassandra Nova.��k�����A megalomaniacal, psychotic asshole.��wC�u@��tX�աρA finger licking dead-inside pixie slab of third rate dime-store nut-milk.��}�����#- And I'll tell you what she can do. - I'm listening.��C�u@��tmԠߡفShe can lick my goddamn cinnamon ring clean and kick rocks all the way to bald hell.�� ՠɡÁ|In fact, I don't give a shit if she removes all my skin and...���C�u@��t�������pops me like some nightmarish blood balloon.��S�͡ǁ�If the last thing I do in this godforsaken cum-gutter existence...�� �C�u@��t�Ơá��is light that fuck-box on fire, I still won't die happy.�� ������ dHoly shit, girl. You crazy.��֠�����That's right, Wade. I won't be happy until...��YC�u@��t���ߡفI've urinated on her freshly barbecued corpse and husk-fucked the charred remains...��������Lwhile gargling Juggernaut's juggernuts.���C�u��t�p�����- Wow! - And you can quote me.��_�����'Kay.��A����� 5Got you, fuckface.�� S�k ������������������ʻ�����������D�� ������.���������� �����淎������R��������K��������y�� ������������^���� �����������^��?�� q�����+����������0�����x��������-��M����곷�������S��л����*����������5�������������4������� p����� ��������������� ��.��A����������]����л���'�����]��@��ʻ���0������]��i�� �����<巎������� 5����I��������N�� /����W����������� ����dr��������N�� ����n6�����U����d���������������軕�������������軕���ڷ��������� ;���������� ����軕���7����� ���� A�����x�����C����;�����N�����C���� ���������������������;��������$�� ���� :��������?��_����{���������� ����#3��������0�� A������ e���� U�����38��������� "������38��.��ֻ��� ,������38��b������� 2������3����� ⻕�� @ѷ����3���P��⻕�� FY�����3���k��M���� OM�����4����� ���� 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