Original subtitles

♪ Here's the story of a lovely lady ♪

♪ Who was bringing up three very lovely girls ♪

♪ All of them had hair of gold, like their mother ♪

♪ The youngest one in curls ♪

♪ It's the story of a man named Brady ♪

♪ Who was busy with three boys of his own ♪

♪ They were four men living all together ♪

♪ Yet they were all alone ♪

♪ Till the one day when the lady met this fellow ♪

♪ And they knew that it was much more than a hunch ♪

♪ That this group must somehow form a family ♪

♪ That's the way we all became the Brady bunch ♪

♪ The Brady bunch, the Brady bunch ♪

♪ That's the way we became the Brady bunch. ♪

Alice, Alice!

The most wonderful thing

in the whole entire world happened!

You were nominated

for the most popular girl in your class.

I was nominated for... Congratulations.

How did you know?

Well, Peter beat you home

by a glass of milk and a slice of bologna.

Isn't it terrific?

Terrific. I think your classmates

have got real class.

Thanks!

Hi, Bobby.

Hi, Jan.

Bobby, you'll never guess

what happened in school today.

I know, you got nominated

for most popular girl.

That's great!

Well, at least Marcia will be surprised.

I already heard.

Yeah. Me, too.

Congratulations.

Honestly!

Surprising people in this family

is harder than smuggling sunrise past a rooster.

We think it's super.

Yeah, I'm going to have a hard time winning

will a girl like Kathy Williams in the contest.

What's so special about her?

Well, she's got the three "B"s--

beautiful, brainy and built.

Oh, Jan, that's not everything.

At my age, it's nothing.

You're just gonna have to get out there

and campaign hard.

Yeah, well, I'm not worried.

Good.

I passed "worried" an hour ago,

now I'm terrified.

Sir, may I please remind you

that I am a happily married woman

and a mother?

Yeah, this is how you get that way.

Listen, I bring you good news.

Oh, first, let me tell you my good news.

Did you know that Jan was nominated...

The most popular girl in the class.

Yeah, six kids and a housekeeper

laid it on me before I had both feet in the door.

What's the new good news?

You know that long weekend

we've been planning for over a year? Yeah.

We are going, on the eighth.

Everything's arranged at the office.

Oh, honey, that's terrific.

Oh, it'll be like a second honeymoon.

Ah, beat me home, huh?

Uh, yes. Honey...

I was out shopping

for our weekend at the beach.

Well... What do you think, honey?

Does it do anything for me?

Not near as much as it's gonna do for me.

Be a little chilly on the beach at night.

At night?

We don't have a room.

Oh, no, Mike.

Didn't you get a reservation?

Honey, everything's booked solid

for the weekend of the eigth.

I even called a friend of a friend.

And?

We're not friends anymore.

Well, there goes our weekend

and our second honeymoon.

Not necessarily.

Listen, I was just thinking.

Since everybody's flocking to the beach,

why don't we flock to the mountains?

They're having good skiing.

Mike, we haven't skied in ages.

Well, who skis on honeymoons?

Maybe you're right.

We could limp around.

Noboby'll know the difference.

Yeah, right, I'll make reservations first thing.

Yeah, okay.

So long, bikini.

I've got to trade you for some long underwear.

Hi, Alice.

Hi, honey.

What are you doing?

Helping you get elected.

You can't very well pass out cigars at school,

but, uh, you could pass out these.

What's that?

Homemade fortune cookie.

There's a little message inside each one.

"Be a smart cookie-- vote for Jan Brady."

Oh, that's a super idea, Alice. Thank you.

Cindy...

look.

"Vote for Jan Brady."

I've got an idea.

I'll put this poster on the back of the car

and I'll drive Jan around the neighborhood.

And then she can pass out those cookies that Alice made.

Yeah, and I've got an idea, too.

I'm making an ad for Jan to put in her school newspaper.

Hey, what's that word that you write

when you don't want anybody to know your name?

Uh... you mean "anonymous"?

Yeah, that's it.

A... non... y... mous.

There. How's this sound?

"Vote for Jan Brady, most popular girl.

"She's pretty and smart and nice and kind.

"I ought to know, because I'm her sister.

Signed, anonymous."

Oh, Cindy!

Can't you have borrowed a better machine?

Stop complaining and keep cranking.

Hey, if that's money you're printing up

I'll take a package of hundreds.

These are handbills for Jan's campaign.

Yeah? Let me see.

They're great except for one little thing.

What's that?

They're so messy, you can't read them.

Oh, well, these first ones are just samples.

They'll get better.

And if they don't

you got a good smear campaign going.

PETER: Vote for Jan Brady.

Be sure to vote for Jan Brady.

Jan Brady for most popular girl. Vote for Jan Brady.

Be sure to vote for Jan Brady.

Jan Brady for most popular girl. Don't forget.

Vote for Jan Brady. Be sure to vote for Jan Brady.

Jan Brady for most popular girl.

JAN: And if you do vote for me, I'll never ever forget it.

If any of you ever needs a favor

all you have to do is ask.

You really mean that, Jan?

Of course I do, Herman.

Well, I've got a favor to ask.

Your wish is my command.

I'm flunking Algebra, and I need help.

You've got it.

My brother Greg is a whiz at Algebra.

He'll give you all the help you need.

Gee, thanks. That'd be super.

No problem. Just remember:

Jan Brady for most popular girl.

You've got my vote.

Hey, Jan...

Oh, hi, Shirley!

Do you remember what you said

about baby-sitting for my brother?

Sure do-- it's the least I can do

for a friend who's voting for me.

I'll take you up on that.

I'll let you know when, okay?

Okay. Anytime, Shirley.

Okay. Bye-bye. Bye.

PETER: Hey, Jan! Yeah?

How goes the campaign?

Okay, I hope.

Gee, it sure takes a lot of promises

to get elected, doesn't it?

Who have you got things promised to?

Everybody.

Do you think I have a chance to win, Peter?

I'll tell you a good way to find out.

How?

Count the votes at the election this afternoon.

Here, remember-- vote for Jan Brady.

Your weekend in the mountains sounds heavenly.

It'll do you and Mr. Brady a world of good

to get away on your own for a little while.

Yeah, but it's sure going to seem strange

without the kids, Alice.

Raising a family gets to be a habit.

Yeah, now there a habit I'd like to talk Sam into.

Ta-da-ta-da-ta-da!

Presenting her royal majesty--

the most popular girl in her class--

Jan Brady!

I won! I won!

I actually won!

Oh, Jan, that's great!

All my hard work finally paid off.

And everybody else who helped. Oh, yeah.

Isn't it fantastic!

This calls for a celebration.

I'm going to prepare a special dish tonight--

something different-- something really far out.

What's that, Alice?

A recipe with meat in it.

I'm going to tell the others what happened.

Yeah.

Yeah, I understand.

Greg!

Look, I got to go now. Bye.

Greg, I won.

I was voted most popular girl.

I know.

How did you know?

That call was from some kid in your class named Herman.

Herman? What did he want?

Well, he's got some stupid idea

that I'm going to help him with his Algebra.

Oh, that. Well, I did

sort of promise him that you would.

Well, you had no right to promise him I'd do anything.

Well, I needed his vote.

Well, I don't happen to have time

to help Herman.

I've got my own studies to worry about.

Don't worry, he'll find someone else to help him.

But you made him a promise.

Only a campaign promise.

The election's over now, and I won.

That's the important thing.

SHIRLEY: Oh, Jan!

Oh, hi, Shirley.

I'm glad I found you.

I really need that favor.

What favor?

You said you'd baby-sit for my little brother.

How about tonight?

Not tonight-- I'll do it some othertime.

But you promised

and this is really important to me.

I'm sorry, I'm busy tonight.

HERMAN: Just a minute!

Thanks a lot, Miss Popularity.

What for?

For nothing, that's what!

What's wrong with you?

You said your brother Greg

was gonna help me with Algebra, didn't you?

Well, don't blame me. Blame Greg.

But you're the one who promised!

It's not my fault. I was sure he'd help.

I wish I could buy my vote back.

So do a lot of the kids.

They're just jealous.

Going home, Pete?

In a couple minutes.

Boy, the kids sure don't like the way you're acting.

I simply don't have time enough

to do everything for everybody.

They're all pretty down on you.

Are you kidding?

Jan Brady's the most popular girl in her class.

( no sound )

No way. We haven't got enough money.

With a sister like Jan, you don't need enemies.

Hi, men.

Hey, Dad!

Dad?

Dad, can we see you for a second?

What's up?

Any chance of getting an advance

on our future allowances?

How far in the future is that future?

Not too far.

We'll live long enough to repay it.

See, I put down an eight-dollar deposit on a radio

and Bobby put a three-dollar deposit on a skateboard.

And now we've got a problem.

What's the problem?

Well, I haven't got the eight dollars

and Bobby hasn't got the three dollars.

Why would you put down money

that you didn't have?

We thought we'd have it.

But Jan welched out on her promise to loan it to us.

I'm sure Jan has a reason for breaking her promise.

She sure does. She's a phony.

She just used us to get elected.

We've got five other kids.

Could we put her up for adoption?

( laughs )

I don't think so.

Look, don't be too hard on her.

I'll see what I can do about the advance.

Thanks, Dad.

Hi, honey. I'm home.

CAROL: Be right there, sweetheart!

Did you get the ski lodge reservation?

Yeah, no problem.

They'll call back and confirm it.

I was able to exchange the beach things.

It came out even. You like?

Hey, yeah, I do like.

It leaves a little more to the imagination

than the bikini

but with an imagination like mine,

I come out ahead.

Your imagination may be good

but your aim leaves a lot to be desired.

Oh, yeah? Prepare for a direct hit.

( phone rings )

Oh, your target will be back in just a minute.

Hello.

Oh, yes, he is.

Just hold on a minute, please.

It's the ski lodge.

Hey, good.

Hello.

Yes, it is.

Ask for an outside room.

Yes, I see.

Oh, are you sure?

( whispers ): Mike...

I see.

Yeah, uh, no... thank you very much.

You didn't ask for an outside room.

I didn't have to, we got one.

Way outside-- outside the lodge.

What happened?

They're overbooked for the weekend of the eighth.

He called to apologize for the mistake.

Oh, no! There goes our first long weekend.

Well, now, honey, there's got to be

a way we can get in.

Don't give up the ship.

Okay, John Paul, where are we going?

I got an idea.

We didn't go to the beach.

We didn't go to the mountains.

Let's go somewhere in between.

Jan?

Oh, not now. I've got to finish

my Most Popular Girl acceptance speech.

I give it on Senior Night.

Well, all I want to know is,

who's your date for the dance afterward?

The most popular boy, naturally-- Billy Garst.

You didn't say he asked you.

He hasn't yet, but he will.

Who else would he take but the most popular girl?

Hmm. I guess.

Listen, after you're through

you said you'd finish up my washing and ironing tonight.

I need it for school tomorrow.

Oh, Marcia, I've got a million things to do tonight.

But, Jan, you promised.

I'm really busy. I've made all sorts of plans.

Well, I made plans, too, because you made that promise.

Not tonight. Some other time.

What's the matter with her?

Oh, she's just upset

because I won't let her use me.

( sirens wailing, car brakes screeching )

You mind?

Are you looking for a broken arm?

We want to watch TV.

Not now. I have a speech to write.

Yeah, not to mention the book report

you were supposed to help me write.

Cindy, I'd already told you.

There's just not enough time for everything.

Instead of voting her the most popular

they should have voted her the most obnoxious.

I'm never going to get any work done in here.

Turn around real slow, pardner

and don't make a move for your gun.

Ho, ho, ho!

Wow. You could ride my range anytime.

You'll be the dude of the dude ranch.

What are you going to wear?

My old cowboy boots.

Well, you better wear something else

or you're going to get arrested.

Not to mention sunburned.

Oh, I hope nothing happened to our reservation.

No way.

We are confirmed for the eighth.

You're a genius.

Mom, Dad, do you have a minute?

Sure, honey.

I've just about finished my acceptance speech.

Do you want to hear it?

Yeah.

Okay.

Fire away.

"Faculty, parents, honored guests, fellow students

ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls..."

Jan, I think that covers just about everybody.

"I'm very honored to have been elected most popular girl.

"It's really a great honor

"because it means that other students believe

"I have more charm and personality

than any other girl in the class."

You sure you want to be so humble?

Why do I have to be so humble?

I won, didn't I? So I must have deserved to.

You deserve to be grateful.

Jan, that speech sounds

like nothing more than an ego trip.

I'm proud of myself.

There's nothing wrong with that, is there?

Jan, I'm afraid you missed the point.

I wouldn't want to get up in front of my classmates

and deliver a speech like that.

But you are big enough to make up your own mind.

I guess there's no point then

in reading you the rest of it.

You will be there

at the award presentation, won't you?

Yes, Jan, we'll be there.

But we're not crazy about that speech.

I sure wish you'd think about it a little more.

Oh, by the way, they changed it to Friday.

The eighth?

Yes.

Tell me she didn't say Friday the eighth.

She didn't say Friday the eighth.

Thank you.

But she did.

Hello, dude ranch?

Marcia?

What?

Do you think this dress is okay for my Senior Night?

Well, it all depends on what creeps are wearing this season.

I'm not a creep.

I agree with Jan. She's not a creep.

JAN: Thank you.

You're a super creep!

( laughs )

What's bugging you?

Do you know who Kathy Williams

is going to the Senior Night dance with?

I thought you said with you.

Well, that's what I thought, too.

But she just called and said

she wasn't going to be seen

with the brother of a jerky sister,

who's the most unpopular girl in school.

Well, if she said that,

she doesn't deserve to have a date.

Oh, she does have a date.

She's going with Billy Garst--

the most popular boy in school.

Billy Garst?

Who also wouldn't want to be seen with you.

I thought you were going with Billy Garst.

So did I-- the most popular boy

always takes the most popular girl.

It's a tradition.

Congratulations, Jan.

You've just given the word "popular" a new meaning.

I thought that winning would be the greatest

but everybody seems to have changed.

Maybe it's you who changed.

I'm still the same.

Are you sure, Jan?

Your brothers and sisters seem to think

you let your success go to your head.

They also think they've been had.

You promised them everything in the world

for getting elected

and you gave nothing in return.

My intentions were good.

Intentions are not good enough.

Suddenly, I feel about as popular as the measles.

The question is, Jan

what are you going to do about it?

Well, I know what I'm not going to do.

I'm not going to go to Senior Night

and face all that hostility.

I don't believe this.

Let me get this straight.

We are not going to the beach,

we are not going to the mountains,

we are not going to the dude range

because we canceled the reservations.

We are going to Jan's Senior Night where Jan won't be?

Yeah, that just about covers everything.

Well, how about dessert?

I've got the high cal, low cal and no cal.

Anybody for any cal?

ALL: None for me, Alice, thanks.

May I be excused?

JAN: Would you all wait a minute?

I've got something I'd like to say, please.

It's important.

Mom, Dad, I've decided to go to Senior Night

and give my speech after all.

Oh, Jan, honey

you know how we feel about that speech.

It's not that speech.

It's a different one that I just wrote

and I'd like you all to hear it

because it concerns you.

"Dear friends--

"thank you for giving me this honor.

"but even more important than winning

"was a lesson I've learned.

"It has to do with being grateful

"and giving and receiving.

"Well, I'm very grateful I've received

"and now i'm going to start giving.

"In the campaign

"making promises just to get elected is wrong.

"and, if it takes me the rest of my life

I'm going to keep every promise I made to everybody."

Well, there's more, but that's the general idea.

Jan, that's great.

Jan, can you do me a favor?

Yes, I'll loan you the money.

No, not that.

After you make that speech

how about being my date at the dance?

That is, if you don't mind

showing up with your own dumb brother.

Oh, Peter, I'd be honored.

( glass clinking )

Now hear this.

I have a speech of my own to give.

First of all, I am very proud of you.

Second of all, in spite of all the delays

your mother and I are going on a weekend vacation

no matter what.

You're kidding. Where?

Well, I don't know where

but I promise you it'll be someplace.

And a Brady never goes back on his promise. Right, Jan?

Right, Dad.

Now, where's the dessert?

Oh, yes, high cal, low cal, no cal?

ALL: High cal!

( knock at door )

ALICE: Mr. and Mrs. Brady, you awake?

Barely, Alice. Come in.

Good morning.

Alice.

What in the world is that?

Breakfast in bed is what that is.

What's the occasion?

Well, because you had to stay in town last night

to hear Jan's speech,

and 'cause you didn't get to go on your long weekend

or take your second honeymoon.

Alice, this is very sweet of you.

That's very thoughtful.

It won't be quite the same

as going away for your second honeymoon

but maybe this'll help.

I'll hang it on the door.

Alice, what will the children think?

Who do you think made up the sign?

Sorry about that.