Original subtitles

♪ Here's the story of a lovely lady ♪

♪ Who was bringing up three very lovely girls ♪

♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪

♪ Like their mother ♪

♪ The youngest one in curls ♪

♪ It's the story of a man named Brady ♪

♪ Who was busy with three boys of his own ♪

♪ They were four men living all together ♪

♪ Yet they were all alone ♪

♪ Till the one day when ♪

♪ The lady met this fellow ♪

♪ And they knew that it was ♪

♪ Much more than a hunch ♪

♪ That this group ♪

♪ Must somehow form a family ♪

♪ That's the way we all ♪

♪ Became the Brady bunch ♪

♪ the Brady bunch ♪

♪ the Brady bunch ♪

♪ that's the way we became ♪

♪ the Brady bunch. ♪

Okay!

Go! Go! Go!

Go!

Touchdown!

Wait a minute, you guys.

This is a kitchen, not a coliseum.

We're just getting in a little practice, Alice.

Wait a second. Is this yours?

No. It's Bobby's.

Tell him it won't be

if he doesn't keep it out of the kitchen.

Take it up to him.

Greg.

Yeah.

You take it to him.

Alice asked you to do it.

You do it. You're older.

( glass breaks )

Oh, no.

Something broke.

I think we'd better go take a look.

Oh, no.

The antique lamp.

Mom's going to kill us.

Personally, I don't think

you're going to get off that easy.

Let's get this on the table.

I hope we're able to fix it

before Mom gets home.

I got some model airplane glue.

It dries real fast.

Good deal.

Alice, not a word about this to anyone, huh?

Fellas, I'm no squealer.

It's real important.

My mouth is shut.

Thanks.

I better shut my eyes, too.

What for?

'Cause if that lamp doesn't pass inspection

I don't want to see

what your mom's going to do to you.

That does it.

What do you think?

Great. Nobody will know it was broken.

(knocking on door)

who is it?

it's me who do you think it is?

Do you think we can trust Bobby?

No way. He woulnd't squeal but he's too young though and he might let it slip

put this in the closet

be there in a minute Bobby

what did you have the door locked for?

we were studying

since when are you guys so crazy about homework?

we just didn't wan to be disturbed that's all

well I just want to get my football

uh I'll get it

why?

I'm your brother afterall. I'll get it for ya

go get 'em tiger. Sock it to 'em

well I need my helmet too

how would you like to use my helmet?

yours? you never let me use yours. I will now

good luck in the game. You can adjust the strap. Have a great game kid

( door shuts )

Hi, Alice.

Hi, Mrs. Brady.

Oh, boy, were the stores crowded today.

Anything new happen around here?

Nope.

Wow. That was a pretty fast "nope."

Yep.

Okay.

Mmm.

Oh, no!

Oh! Alice!

Alice!

Yes, Mrs. Brady?

Did you clean in here today?

Nope.

You're sure?

Yep.

You're beginning to sound like Gary Cooper again.

Look.

How in the world do you suppose that happened?

That is what I'm trying to find out.

Now, Alice, who was in here today?

Who?

Uh, well, it could be almost anybody.

Hard to say.

Look, Alice, this is very important. Please.

Now, you've always told me the truth before, haven't you?

Oh, yes, ma'am. I've always told you the truth.

The truth is something

that I have always told you.

I've always told you the truth.

Now, look, Alice

I want to know exactly how this happened

what happened, who did it and why.

Is that a direct question?

Yep. That's a direct question.

Yeah, Alice is some friend.

Yeah. She said she'd keep her mouth shut.

She sure opened it in a hurry.

Maybe it wasn't Alice's fault.

Nobody else knew we broke the lamp.

Good ol' Alice.

She cost me a week's allowance.

What about me?

My allowance is bigger.

( knocking )

Hey, guys, I just want to tell you I'm sorry.

I didn't want to say anything.

Sure.

There was no way out of it.

I couldn't lie to your mother.

Couldn't you have said nothing?

I tried, honest I did.

I really tried.

( scratching )

Alice, was anybody playing the record player last night?

Yeah. Marcia.

She must've played that new album of hers about 20 times.

Wouldn't you call that squealing?

All Alice had to do was to turn off the record player.

Well, maybe she didn't know the record player was on.

That's right. Maybe she didn't.

Alice knows everything that goes on around here.

Now I can't use the stereo for a whole week.

I never thought Alice would turn into a squealer.

Hey, girls, I finally got it worked out

so we're going to have

the pillowcases match the sheets.

Grand.

Ever since I washed the yellow cases with the blue sheets

I've never been able to get caught up.

Jan, aren't you supposed to be wearing your glasses

while you're reading?

It's too much trouble.

Your folks said when you read, you wear them, remember?

You better put them on

or she'll squeal on you, too.

Squeal? Oh, you mean Peter and Greg.

I mean me.

You told mom that I left the record player on all night.

I told what? You know what.

Now I can't use the stereo for a whole week.

Oh, honey, I had no idea when she asked me

who'd been using it and why she wanted to know.

Sure you didn't.

No, honest.

She just asked me a question and I answered it.

I'm sorry, honey.

No matter what I say nowadays

it turns out to be something I shouldn't have said.

we're ready to go Alice

the new people on the corner invited us over to swim

good findout if they've got a housekeeper, maybe she'll invite me over

Bobby are you wearing your new trunks or those old ones with all the holes

you're not wearing your bathing suit you're wearing your birthday suit

they swim without clothes on over there

we can't wear any if they don't wear any

who moved in down there? Adam and Eve

No the DiBelffios, there father's a doctor

Well it isn't that much of a practive if they can't afford bathing suits

now upsatirs and suit up

Dr. DiBelffio says the sun has lots of vitamins

well so does orange juice but you don't go swimming in it go on upstairs

why can't we go like this?

you're not gonna swim at an x-rated swimming pool withhout your parent's permission

but Alice?

no but, out out out

Hi, kids. How did it go today?

Okay.

You both had tests, didn't you?

Yeah.

Hi.

Hi.

I got some beautiful peaches today.

You want some?

No, thank you.

( hammering )

Can you fix it?

Sure. It'll be easy.

( grunting )

Gee, it's harder than I thought.

Maybe Alice can fix it.

We don't want Alice doing us any favors.

Yeah, you're right.

Greg and Peter said we can't trust her anymore.

Marcia and Jan said the same thing.

I guess Alice isn't our friend anymore.

Yep.

Remember how we all used to like her.

Well, I just don't understand it, Kay.

I don't know how it happened

between the kids and me.

Don't start crying again, Alice.

The coffee's weak enough already.

I feel so awful.

Look, Alice, it's not the end of the world.

Oh, we used to have such fun together.

My last birthday

the boys made up this big card like a diploma they made me an honorary brother

the girls made my birthday cake it was just terrible I mean dry with lumps of flour

the whipped cream was sour and the icing was runny and I just loved it

sobbing - I had three peices

can't you talk to Mr. and Mrs. Brady about this?

well that'd just make it worse for the kids

they'd resent me even more

besides I can't make them order the kids to like me

Alice, you've made the worst mistake a housekeeper can make.

Getting too emotionally involved with the family.

And I speak from experience.

When I'm working, I just do my work.

Getting too attached can break your heart.

well thats why I've got to leave right away. The sooner the better

You got to help me, Kay.

As long as you're not working right now

you can fill in for me

until the Bradys find a regular housekeeper.

What excuse are you going to give them for leaving?

Well, I don't know.

I'll think of something.

Alice,

are you sure this is what you want?

No, it isn't what I want, but it's what's best

and the sooner I leave, the better.

( sobbing )

Leave us?

Alice, I don't know what to say.

My uncle Winston called me last night

and I wanted to tell you then and there

but I just couldn't.

Yeah, I could tell you were upset about something.

You see, my uncle Winston has this very nice dress shop.

But two days ago

the woman who runs it for him just up and eloped.

I'd be taking over for her.

Oh.

Yeah, that really sounds like a very good job, Alice.

I can earn quite a bit of money

and eventually I'd be a partner.

It's really a terrific opportunity.

Well, you know we'd never stand in your way.

Of course, it's not just the money.

I mean, it's family.

My uncle Winston, you know.

Oh, Alice, of course, I know.

You're like a member of our family.

We all love you very much.

I love all of you, too.

I promised I'd leave right away.

But Alice, what am I going to tell the children?

They'll be heartbroken.

Couldn't you stay until they come home

and say good-bye?

I'll write them a letter.

Give them a call.

I really better get packed

if I'm not going to miss that plane.

Alice?

Could I give you a hand?

Well, you should have seen the look on Lester's face

when he found his sneakers

filled with the shaving cream.

Hi. Hi.

You're not Alice.

No, I'm not. I'm Kay.

Hi. Hello.

Hi.

Where's Alice?

Gone.

And you are...?

Marcia.

What do you mean, gone?

Left. Packed up. Went.

And you are...?

Greg.

Where?

Back home.

For good?

Seems so.

Alice took off just like that?

I can't believe it.

You can believe it.

Thanks.

Gee, I never thought Alice would leave.

We were just kind of ignoring her

for squealing on us.

She didn't even say good-bye.

She could have at least left a note.

She just doesn't like us anymore.

Well, if that's the way she feels about it

it's okay with me.

Maybe she's doing us a big favor by leaving.

You said it.

Yeah.

Let's look on the bright side.

At least we won't have to worry

about being snitched on anymore.

Right. No more of Alice's reports

to Mom and Dad.

I bet Kay's not a snitcher like Alice.

Maybe we'll like her even better.

We probably will.

Sure.

Hey, Kay!

I bet you can't work this puzzle.

Sorry, I don't have time for puzzles.

Alice used to bet with us all the time, remember?

She could never work the puzzle.

Sure, she could.

She could not.

She could, too.

She just wanted to make you feel good.

Give you a point, come on.

Hi, Kay.

Hey, Kay, how about you and Peter against me

on two-on-one?

Sorry. The housekeeper doesn't play basketball.

She keeps house.

But Alice used to play with us.

Yeah, in fact, it used to crack me up

the way she shot the ball.

Watch this, Kay.

She spread her legs real wide, right?

She'd line it up.

( boys laughing )

That was Alice.

I'm Kay.

I got this one from Loretta.

It's really cute.

Really?

( pop music playing )

Hey, wow! That's neat.

Listen to that, Kay.

Isn't it great for dancing?

Alice used to make up the craziest steps.

Oh, yeah-- remember the one she called the mugwump?

Oh, that's so good.

Oh, she'd go like this.

( laughing )

Looks pretty silly to me.

Mrs. Brady.

Oh, thanks, Kay.

If you don't need me for anything

I'd like to get on home.

Oh, all right, unless you'd like

to stay and watch a little television.

Alice used to do that every once in a while.

No, thank you, Mrs. Brady.

I always ended up watching her programs.

I have my own TV set at home.

So, if you'll just excuse me, I'll go get my things.

Oh... all right.

Good night, Kay.

Good night.

Hi, kids.

Would you like to watch some TV with me?

Uh, no, mom.

We'd kind of like to talk to you.

Sure. What's up?

Well, we wanted to talk to you about Alice.

Alice?

What about her?

Well, we think we know why she left

and took the other job.

It was our fault.

All of us kids weren't being very nice to her.

Sort of giving her a cold shoulder treatment.

Cold shoulder?

We figured she wasn't our friend anymore.

Why on earth would you think a thing like that?

Because she was squealing on us.

Squealing on you?

Like with Pete and me breaking the lamp.

And me leaving the record player on.

For your information, young man

Alice didn't squeal on you.

I asked her to tell me what happened

and I told her I wanted to know the truth.

And she had absolutely no idea

why I asked about the record player.

Absolutely none.

She said that.

And I didn't believe her.

Oh...

We never wanted her to leave.

Can you blame her?

We're sorry, Mom.

We all want her back.

I'm afraid "sorry" won't help.

Sometimes, when you push people too far

you just can't bring them back again.

Come on, Marcia.

Hi. Hi.

I guess you heard.

Yes, I heard.

We didn't mean we don't like you, Kay.

I understand.

We sure spread sunshine around.

Hi.

Say, kids, strangest coincidence happened to me last night.

I was visiting a friend

and we had coffee in this restaurant

and guess who I bumped into.

Who? Alice.

Alice? Here in town?

Where?

Tell us, please.

The Golden Spoon at Fourth and Oak.

Well, are you sure it was her?

Positive.

There's only one Alice.

You can say that again.

Oh, thanks, Kay.

Six, please.

Six. Right this way.

There we are.

Enjoy your food.

Thank you.

There she is.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. Hi, Alice.

I just got back to town.

That other job I had didn't work out.

This is a good job, though.

Good tips.

Alice.

Hmm?

Oh, yeah. Be with you in a moment, folks.

It's really an interesting job.

I meet a lot of interesting people.

I'm sure you do.

That's really good.

Well, what are you doing around here, anyway?

Well...

Well...

We're, we're just passing by.

Passing by?

Sure. On our way home from school.

Oh, that's interesting.

You all go to different schools.

Miss, I'm in a hurry.

Oh, yeah, I'll be right there, right there.

How are the folks?

They're fine.

Alice, the customers are waiting.

I'm taking an order, Mr. Foster.

Well, take it.

Get a move on.

GREG: Ah, well, I guess we should order something.

Miss, do you mind?

One minute. One minute.

I'll have a glass of milk

and a chocolate doughnut.

Milk and a plain doughnut.

Chocolate.

Chocolate makes you break out.

Alice.

He's a very nervous man.

Bobby, will you stop drinking everybody else's water?

You won't have room left for your food.

Okay, who's next?

Uh, me.

I'll have a caramel fudge sundae.

One fruit cup.

Too much caramel sundae makes too much Marcia.

Then I'll have the caramel fudge sundae.

Good. Two fruit cups.

I don't know what I want.

Well, don't squint, Jan.

Put your glasses on.

Thanks, Alice.

Alice, we've missed you.

We're sorry

for what we did.

We didn't mean to treat you that way.

We love you, Alice.

We know you didn't squeal on us.

BOBBY: Honest, Alice.

You mean...

you mean you really missed me?

Yeah, we did. Did we ever. Yeah.

( delighted whimpering )

Every time I go by a telephone, I want to phone you guys.

The other day, I took a taxi out

just to look at the house.

You have no idea how much I've missed you.

Alice!

Oh, Mr. Foster, these are the Bradys!

Marvelous, and these are the customers.

They'd like a word with you, if you don't mind.

You got no idea how much I have missed these kids.

Perhaps I can arrange for you

to spend more time with them...

all day, if you get the point.

Yeah. Right, right.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Foster.

Thank you so much.

Come on, kids, let's go home.

( excited yelling )

Wait a minute.

Where do you think you're going?

I got my old job back, Mr. Foster,

and I'm never going to leave it again.

( excited cheering )

Oh, Alice, I can't tell you

how good it is to have you back.

I have to keep pinching myself

to be sure I really am.

You know, I really believed

that story you told us about your uncle Winston.

Well, I may not be

the greatest housekeeper in the world

but I'm a pretty good liar.

And by the way, did Kay work out all right?

Oh, Alice, she was fabulous.

The house was always spotless.

She relined the kitchen cupboards.

She ironed the clothes without a wrinkle.

She vacuumed the drapes.

( laughing ): Now, Alice, wait till you hear this.

She even dusted the garage.

Want to know something, Alice?

What?

It was one of the worst weeks

we have ever had.

( laughing ): Oh.

Don't you ever do that again.

Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org