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1
00:00:03,962 --> 00:00:05,839
♪ Of a lovely lady ♪
2
00:00:05,880 --> 00:00:07,048
♪ Who was bringing up ♪
3
00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:09,551
♪ Three very lovely girls ♪
4
00:00:09,592 --> 00:00:12,345
♪ All of them had
hair of gold ♪
5
00:00:12,387 --> 00:00:14,139
♪ Like their mother ♪
6
00:00:14,180 --> 00:00:17,267
♪ The youngest one
in curls ♪
7
00:00:17,308 --> 00:00:21,312
♪ It's the story
of a man named Brady ♪
8
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:25,191
♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
9
00:00:25,233 --> 00:00:29,154
♪ They were four men
living all together ♪
10
00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:31,698
♪ Yet they
were all alone ♪
11
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:35,869
♪ Till the one day
when the lady met this fellow ♪
12
00:00:35,910 --> 00:00:39,247
♪ And they knew that it was
much more than a hunch ♪
13
00:00:39,289 --> 00:00:43,168
♪ That this group
must somehow form a family ♪
14
00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:46,421
♪ That's the way we all
became the Brady Bunch ♪
15
00:00:46,463 --> 00:00:48,757
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
16
00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:50,759
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
17
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:57,599
♪ That's the way we became
the Brady Bunch. ♪
18
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:22,457
Come on, Peter!
19
00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:27,837
Give somebody else a chance!
20
00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:31,508
All I was doing
was brushing my teeth.
21
00:01:31,549 --> 00:01:33,635
Well, how many
teeth have you got?
22
00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:34,844
The same amount as you,
23
00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:37,013
but my mouth isn't
as big as yours.
24
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:38,014
Oh, ho, ho.
25
00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:39,224
It's all yours,
Your Highness.
26
00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:40,433
Oh, very...
27
00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:41,309
Cindy!
28
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:42,394
( chuckles )
29
00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:44,437
Cindy!
30
00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:54,197
Marcia, wait a minute.
That's my bike.
31
00:01:54,239 --> 00:01:57,033
I know. Mine has a flat.
I won't be long.
32
00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:04,708
( music playing over TV )
33
00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:10,672
( switch clicks )
34
00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:11,673
What are you doing?
35
00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:13,008
I was watching
a movie.
36
00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:16,011
Jan, we want to
watch a ball game.
37
00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:18,096
Yeah, you can watch
a movie any old time.
38
00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,347
But I want to see
this movie.
39
00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:20,306
Come on.
40
00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:22,892
( talking over each other )
( knob clatters on floor )
41
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,185
That's your fault!
42
00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:26,146
It is not!
You broke it!
You made me.
43
00:02:26,187 --> 00:02:28,189
Now we're going to
miss the ball game.
I did not!
44
00:02:28,231 --> 00:02:30,275
( arguing loudly )
45
00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:34,571
Okay! Okay!
Everybody, please.
46
00:02:34,612 --> 00:02:36,364
Now, what's the problem?
47
00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:38,283
I'll tell you
what the problem is:
48
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:41,036
You have to wait in line
for everything around here.
49
00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:43,246
Someone's always borrowing
your things.
50
00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:43,872
I never have
any privacy
51
00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:47,083
because I've got too many
brothers and sisters.
52
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,377
I wish I were an only child.
53
00:02:57,260 --> 00:02:59,262
I have to live
with five brothers and sisters
54
00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:02,349
all day... every day.
55
00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:03,391
Okay, honey,
56
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,435
but they have
to live with you, too.
57
00:03:05,477 --> 00:03:07,437
Well, I wish
they didn't.
58
00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:09,314
I'm tired of getting
pushed around.
59
00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:11,441
Jan, you're not
getting pushed around.
60
00:03:11,483 --> 00:03:13,026
Listen, when you live
in a large family,
61
00:03:13,068 --> 00:03:15,487
you have to learn
to give and take
a little bit.
62
00:03:15,528 --> 00:03:17,280
Well, my friend Donna
doesn't.
63
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:18,990
She doesn't have
any of these problems.
64
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:21,493
Yeah, but does your friend Donna
have any brothers and sisters?
65
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:24,120
No, and she couldn't be happier.
66
00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,164
She doesn't have to wait
for the phone
67
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,083
or the bathroom or anything.
68
00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:30,377
She has all the privacy
she wants.
69
00:03:30,418 --> 00:03:31,336
Now, just a minute, Jan.
70
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:33,004
There are two sides to that.
71
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:35,840
Donna also doesn't have anyone
to help her with her homework
72
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:38,176
or to play or to go places with.
73
00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,552
Well, that sounds great.
74
00:03:39,594 --> 00:03:41,012
Well, Jan, what's good
for one person
75
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,597
isn't always good for another.
76
00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,516
Listen, I think
you ought to
consider yourself
77
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,351
a very lucky
young lady.
78
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,978
Hear, hear.
79
00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:50,730
Mom, Donna invited me
80
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,732
to spend Saturday
night at her house.
81
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:53,775
Okay?
82
00:03:53,817 --> 00:03:54,526
Saturday night?
83
00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:58,113
Now, Jan, you know that's
the night of the square dance.
84
00:03:58,154 --> 00:03:59,614
We're going to be a square.
85
00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,574
Well, couldn't Alice take
my part?
86
00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:03,952
Well, yes, I suppose she could,
87
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:06,663
but it wouldn't be the same
without you, honey.
88
00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:08,164
We're going as a family.
89
00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:09,958
That's what I mean!
90
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,544
Donna doesn't have to do
family things.
91
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:15,755
Sometimes I wish I didn't have
any brothers or sisters.
92
00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:22,220
Then I could do what I wanted
without anybody to bug me.
93
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:22,387
Hi Alice
94
00:04:22,387 --> 00:04:26,558
hi
95
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:29,227
one left
96
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,063
Bobby you comeback here
97
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:35,191
Alice, ya Bobby you come back
here
98
00:04:35,233 --> 00:04:37,444
why am I hollering for Bobby to
come back here?
99
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,946
becuase he just took my apple
100
00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:41,406
oh if that's all that's
bothering you no problem
101
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:43,324
well that was the last appe
Alice
102
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:48,246
oh no no this is the last apple
103
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:50,957
you're something else Alice
thanks
104
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,126
Alice
105
00:04:53,168 --> 00:04:54,544
Mr. Brady's gonna drive me to
the market to pick up a few
things
106
00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:56,379
I thought we finished all the
shopping yesterday?
107
00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:59,799
Oh well this is for something
special
108
00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:02,302
I decided to make strawberry
preserves for the auction at the
charity ho-down
109
00:05:02,344 --> 00:05:02,635
you did? ya
110
00:05:02,677 --> 00:05:06,848
is something wrong?
111
00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:11,394
no. no it's just that I was
going to make
strawberry preserves for the
auction myself
112
00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:13,021
well my mine are from my
grandmother's secret recipe
Alice. Won 4 blue ribbons for it
113
00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:15,899
Must have been really something
114
00:05:15,940 --> 00:05:18,526
My aunt's secret recipe won 6
ribbons
115
00:05:18,568 --> 00:05:21,029
Look Alice why can't we both
make preserves?
116
00:05:21,071 --> 00:05:24,366
I mean it's no contest between
us right?
117
00:05:24,407 --> 00:05:29,621
Okay I'll go pick up those
things
118
00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:34,501
by the way what's in your aunt's
secret recipe?
119
00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:38,254
oh I guess most of the same
things that are in your
grandmother's secret recipe
120
00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:53,728
bye
121
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:54,270
Hey, these sacks
will be great
122
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:56,439
for the potato-sack
race at the hoedown.
123
00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:58,191
Yeah. Uh...
don't you think
124
00:05:58,233 --> 00:05:59,567
we'd better
clean them out first?
125
00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:03,196
Nah, we'll just
jump the dust
out of them.
126
00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:10,453
Hi.
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
127
00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:13,707
Hi.
128
00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:14,916
What are you doing?
129
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,292
Have you got a problem?
130
00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,336
No. We're just getting
131
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:19,713
the sacks ready
for the race.
132
00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:21,047
Maybe we'll win
a prize.
Yeah.
133
00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,173
Yeah. Wait till you see
what we got
134
00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:23,174
for the square dance.
Yeah.
135
00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,718
Wow.
Look here.
136
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:27,804
Think the rain's gonna
hurt the rhubarb?
137
00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:30,724
No, but I sure hope
it kills the corn.
138
00:06:30,765 --> 00:06:33,018
Hey, it should
be a lot of fun
Saturday night, huh?
139
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:35,270
Yeah. You know, I hope Jan
changes her mind
140
00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:36,438
and decides
to come with us.
141
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:37,939
Well, honey, don't worry
if she doesn't.
142
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,149
Jan's going
through a phase.
143
00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,276
She's thinks she doesn't have
any privacy.
144
00:06:41,317 --> 00:06:42,360
It'll pass.
145
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,778
We all treat each
other the same.
146
00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:45,321
She has as much
privacy as the
rest of us.
147
00:06:45,363 --> 00:06:46,740
Well, be a little
considerate of her
148
00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:48,450
till she gets
over her phase.
149
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:50,452
Okay, we'll try
150
00:06:50,493 --> 00:06:51,953
and take kindly
to the critter.
151
00:06:51,995 --> 00:06:53,204
Yes, sir, we'll try.
152
00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,790
( all laughing )
153
00:06:58,335 --> 00:06:58,960
The reason I called, Amy,
154
00:06:59,002 --> 00:07:02,672
is that groovy red hair
and mysterious green eyes
155
00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:05,300
really turn me on.
156
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,218
It's Greg Brady.
157
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,220
You remember, I talked
to you in school yesterday
158
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:11,681
about the charity hoedown
Saturday night.
159
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:13,350
Yeah, well, I thought
if you were going...
160
00:07:13,391 --> 00:07:14,601
Oh, it never fails!
161
00:07:14,642 --> 00:07:15,894
One of them's
always on the phone
162
00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:16,895
when you want
to use it.
163
00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:18,897
Do you mind?
I'm trying to...
164
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:21,691
Uh, uh, Jan, listen,
if you need it,
165
00:07:21,733 --> 00:07:23,318
I'll let you have
the phone.
166
00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,153
Listen, Amy,
can I call you back later?
167
00:07:25,195 --> 00:07:27,739
Okay, good-bye.
168
00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:33,411
Here you are, Jan.
It's all yours.
169
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:36,247
gee thanks
170
00:07:36,289 --> 00:07:38,875
75, 80, 90,95
171
00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:41,211
I've got 95 cents, how much do
you got?
172
00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:43,463
I got 60 cents
173
00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:46,591
let's see 95 and 60
174
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:48,593
thats a dollar 55
175
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:50,011
hey thats more thatn we need
176
00:07:50,053 --> 00:07:52,180
what is this big financial
transaction?
177
00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:55,266
we finally got enough money to
buy a trick rope for the square
dance Saturday night
178
00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:58,186
don't forget 95 cents of that
rope is mine
179
00:07:58,228 --> 00:08:00,230
you only get to use 60 cents
worth
180
00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:03,108
okay I'll take 30 cents worth on
each end
181
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:06,778
now I don't understand that but
it sounds mighty shrewed.
182
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,405
Look, Alice.
Hmm?
183
00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:09,989
Isn't that a
pretty bracelet?
184
00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:11,783
Oh, yeah.
It's absolutely free.
185
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,368
Well, you'd better read
that small print
186
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:15,078
and see how free
that "free" is.
187
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,329
Well, you do have
to subscribe
188
00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:19,040
to this new teen
magazine for $1.50,
189
00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:21,501
and as usual, I'm broke.
190
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,550
Think we ought
to lend Jan the money?
191
00:08:28,591 --> 00:08:30,343
Are you nuts?
192
00:08:30,385 --> 00:08:31,594
What for?
193
00:08:31,636 --> 00:08:33,722
To be considerate,
like Mom and Dad said.
194
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:36,307
Look, she's done
a lot of nice things for you.
195
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,475
Like what?
196
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:38,852
Well, like...
197
00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:40,270
well, like she helped you
with your homework.
198
00:08:40,311 --> 00:08:43,356
Homework's one thing.
Money's another.
199
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:46,067
Well, I'm going
to lend her my money.
200
00:08:46,109 --> 00:08:48,153
There goes the
rope trick.
201
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:49,446
You can put your money
back in your bank
202
00:08:49,487 --> 00:08:51,489
or you can be
a nice guy.
203
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:54,409
What a rotten choice.
204
00:08:57,746 --> 00:08:59,414
Hey, Jan,
how'd you like to get
205
00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:00,707
that money
for your bracelet?
206
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:02,000
Would I?
207
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,168
But it's
only a loan.
208
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:04,502
What's the catch?
209
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,796
No catch. Just pay it back
whenever you can.
210
00:09:06,838 --> 00:09:08,048
Don't rush.
211
00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,633
We're just trying
to help you, that's all.
212
00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:12,969
Gee, thanks.
213
00:09:14,763 --> 00:09:16,931
That was a very nice
gesture, fellows.
214
00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:19,601
You deserve to have
something nice done for you.
215
00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:22,645
How about giving us $1.55?
216
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,022
Come on.
217
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,985
Ow! Freckles aren't
supposed to hurt.
218
00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:30,403
That's enough.
219
00:09:30,445 --> 00:09:31,988
Cindy, you want to see
how you'll look
220
00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:33,740
before you go
to the square dance, don't you?
221
00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:35,825
Yeah, but you better
not put too many on me,
222
00:09:35,867 --> 00:09:37,243
or else they
won't let me in.
223
00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:37,786
Why?
224
00:09:37,786 --> 00:09:40,121
They'll think I
have the measles.
225
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:41,790
( laughs )
Hi.
226
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:43,208
Hi.
227
00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:45,919
I'm sorry, Jan.
228
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:46,878
I was sitting
on your bed.
229
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:48,213
I'll straighten
it out.
230
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,673
I'll clean these things
off your desk
231
00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:50,382
in case you want
to use it.
232
00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:52,801
Oh, and any time
you want your bed
straightened,
233
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,886
I'll be glad
to do it.
Cindy, come on.
234
00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:56,846
Let's do the freckles
downstairs, okay?
235
00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:59,849
CINDY:
Have a nice privacy!
236
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:08,650
Alice, would you like to see
what's in my recipe?
237
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,902
I mean, I really have
no secrets.
238
00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:11,569
No, I know you don't,
Mrs. Brady.
239
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:15,865
I wouldn't want my recipe
to be a secret, either.
240
00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:18,326
Alice, could I borrow
some of the sugar, please?
241
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:19,703
Oh, sure.
242
00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:20,745
Thanks.
Mm-hmm.
243
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:27,210
Hmm, very interesting.
244
00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:28,336
One cup of sugar
245
00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:29,921
to three-quarters
of a cup of fruit.
246
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:31,339
Oh, is that what I used?
247
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:35,010
Mm.
248
00:10:35,051 --> 00:10:37,470
Three dashes, huh?
249
00:10:37,512 --> 00:10:39,723
Oh, well, who counts?
250
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,683
I think mine's ready to boil.
251
00:10:41,725 --> 00:10:43,476
Mine, too.
252
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:49,357
Hey, what's cooking?
253
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:49,941
Oh, hi, honey.
254
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:51,943
Alice and I are making
strawberry preserves
255
00:10:51,985 --> 00:10:52,902
for the charity auction.
256
00:10:52,944 --> 00:10:53,611
Yes, Mrs. Brady and I
257
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:56,156
are both making
preserves for
the auction.
258
00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:58,658
Honey, which pot
do you think looks the best?
259
00:10:58,700 --> 00:10:59,868
What is this,
a contest?
260
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,536
No. Are you kidding?
Absolutely not.
261
00:11:01,578 --> 00:11:03,038
Not at all.
we were just curious.
262
00:11:03,079 --> 00:11:05,373
Yeah, listen, just to satisfy
my own curiosity,
263
00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,833
I came in
about my overalls.
264
00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:08,668
Either these things
were made for Paul Bunyan
265
00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:12,630
or two guys to wear
at the same time.
266
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,925
Ouch!
267
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:17,677
Oh, honey,
I'm sorry.
268
00:11:17,719 --> 00:11:19,804
Well, look, look,
just stay still, okay?
269
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,348
Could you use
shorter pins there?
270
00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:22,849
Well, try
not to move.
271
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:24,351
Okay, how that's for
length, Mr. Brady?
272
00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:25,935
Let's see... Ow!
273
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,980
Mike, I told you
not to move.
274
00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:30,857
Well, you leave the length
to me, Mr. Brady.
275
00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:32,233
I'll make sure
they're high enough
276
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:34,277
to show your purple,
checkered socks.
277
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:35,904
Bring a tourniquet.
I'm bleeding to death.
278
00:11:35,945 --> 00:11:38,156
Alice, have
you seen my
magazine?
279
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,449
Well, isn't that it?
280
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:40,784
Oh, yes, thank you.
281
00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:41,826
Reckon I'd better
go get myself
282
00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:43,370
some more pins.
283
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,372
Okay, now just stand still
like that.
284
00:11:45,413 --> 00:11:47,582
Oh, Jan, listen,
would you like to try on
285
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:48,833
your dress
for the square dance?
286
00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:50,251
How come
you got me one?
287
00:11:50,293 --> 00:11:51,711
Well, I just thought
288
00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,338
maybe you'd change your mind
and come with us.
289
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:54,130
Yeah, we're going to
have a lot of fun.
290
00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:58,593
Well, I promised Donna that I'd
spend Saturday night with her.
291
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:00,637
Well, couldn't you spend
some other night with Donna?
292
00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:02,472
I guess.
293
00:12:02,514 --> 00:12:05,058
I'll have
to think about it.
294
00:12:08,269 --> 00:12:09,813
What are you doing?
295
00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:12,399
Standing still.
296
00:12:14,109 --> 00:12:16,152
( laughs )
297
00:12:20,699 --> 00:12:22,325
Oh... you can
use the stairs
298
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,451
if you want to.
299
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:24,744
I'll wait till later.
300
00:12:24,786 --> 00:12:27,038
Cindy, what's going on
around here?
301
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,290
I was just trying
to be considerate.
302
00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:30,875
Everybody is.
303
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,545
How come everybody's
so nice to me all of a sudden?
304
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,046
Because you're
supposed to be.
305
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,798
What do you mean,
supposed to be?
306
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:40,051
We're supposed to be nice to you
until you get over your problem.
307
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:42,345
Then we can forget
about you again.
308
00:12:42,387 --> 00:12:44,180
So that's it!
309
00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:46,307
I didn't
really mean...
Come on.
310
00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,268
JAN:
Greg, Bobby, Peter!
311
00:12:49,060 --> 00:12:51,104
BOBBY:
What does she want?
312
00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:52,439
GREG:
What's going on?
313
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:54,065
Marcia, come in here
a minute.
314
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:55,191
I want to talk to you.
315
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:56,693
GREG:
Jan, what's this about?
316
00:12:56,735 --> 00:12:59,362
Okay, you can
just cut out the
special treatment.
317
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:01,114
Cindy told me
everything.
318
00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:03,074
Well, not everything.
319
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,910
Just what I wasn't
supposed to.
320
00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:08,038
You're a bunch
of fakes.
321
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,289
That's what you are.
322
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:10,749
What do you mean, fakes?
323
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,000
I don't need your help,
324
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:14,044
and I don't need your
special treatment.
325
00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:14,794
Jan, take it easy.
326
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:17,672
And I don't need you for
brothers and sisters, either.
327
00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:20,717
See? Never lend
a relative money.
328
00:13:20,759 --> 00:13:21,926
Who asked you
to do it?
329
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:22,635
If I were an
only child,
330
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:26,139
I wouldn't have
any phony brothers
and sisters.
331
00:13:26,181 --> 00:13:27,932
Who needs you?
332
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:28,975
You mean that, Jan?
333
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,810
You're right. I sure do.
334
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:31,436
Well, if that's
what you want,
335
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:34,105
I'm sure it could be arranged,
right, you guys?
336
00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:35,190
( agreements muttered )
337
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,232
You just
lost yourself
338
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:37,817
five brothers
and sisters.
339
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:38,902
And you can have
the whole house
340
00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:40,111
to yourself.
Great.
341
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,196
For us, too.
342
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:41,863
As far as you're
concerned,
343
00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:44,366
we don't even exist.
Yeah, we're not
even here!
344
00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:45,367
GREG:
Consider us invisible.
345
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:46,785
Come on, gang,
let's disappear.
346
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:47,744
Yeah, let's go.
347
00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:50,622
BOBBY:
Let's disappear.
348
00:13:53,792 --> 00:13:55,126
Why are
we leaving for?
349
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:58,046
Yeah, this
is our room.
350
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:13,520
( "Turkey in the Straw"
playing )
351
00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:37,293
Isn't this great, Donna?
352
00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:38,461
I can talk on the phone
353
00:14:38,503 --> 00:14:40,839
whenever I want
as long as I want.
354
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,632
Well, I'll explain
Saturday night
355
00:14:42,674 --> 00:14:45,176
when I sleep over at your house.
356
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:48,138
Oh, that music's
just my family practicing
357
00:14:48,179 --> 00:14:50,598
for that corny square dance.
358
00:14:57,230 --> 00:15:00,316
( shouting and squealing )
359
00:15:18,877 --> 00:15:21,004
I think that's
enough for tonight.
360
00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:24,174
As they say down on the farm,
Pappy's pooped.
361
00:15:24,215 --> 00:15:25,759
( all laugh )
362
00:15:27,844 --> 00:15:31,097
MARCIA:
Oh, wow,
that was fun.
363
00:15:34,517 --> 00:15:35,560
Do you mind?
364
00:15:35,602 --> 00:15:37,520
I'd like
to go upstairs.
365
00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:38,855
Don't mind us.
366
00:15:38,897 --> 00:15:40,732
We're invisible, remember?
367
00:15:42,192 --> 00:15:44,444
( sighs )
368
00:15:50,075 --> 00:15:51,785
Now, what was that
all about?
369
00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:53,286
Oh, we agreed to make
a deal with her.
370
00:15:53,328 --> 00:15:54,287
What kind of a deal?
371
00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:54,788
Well, she's always
complaining
372
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:57,207
about wanting to
be an only child.
373
00:15:57,248 --> 00:15:58,875
So, what's the deal?
374
00:15:58,917 --> 00:16:00,001
That's the way
she wants it.
375
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:02,087
When she's around,
we don't exist.
376
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:05,048
We're invisible.
377
00:16:05,090 --> 00:16:07,008
Uh-oh, Mike.
What do you think?
378
00:16:07,050 --> 00:16:09,135
Well, I think it's
better if the kids
379
00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:09,844
sometimes work out
things for themselves.
380
00:16:09,886 --> 00:16:12,138
You know, if that's
the kind of medicine
Jan wants,
381
00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:14,182
I think she's about to
get a big dose of it.
382
00:16:14,224 --> 00:16:16,810
Well, here we go.
383
00:16:19,479 --> 00:16:20,438
See you later, Mom.
384
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,189
Where are you
going, honey?
385
00:16:21,231 --> 00:16:22,565
To the library.
386
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:23,900
Okay, but be back by 1:00.
387
00:16:23,942 --> 00:16:26,069
Alice doesn't run
an all-day lunch counter.
388
00:16:26,111 --> 00:16:27,153
Hey! Just a minute, you.
389
00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:28,571
What? What do you think
you're doing?
390
00:16:28,613 --> 00:16:29,698
That's my sweater.
391
00:16:29,739 --> 00:16:31,324
So what? I always borrow
your sweater.
392
00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:32,492
Well, not anymore.
393
00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:34,160
You no longer have a
sister named Marcia,
394
00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:34,619
and if there's
no Marcia,
395
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:36,538
there's no
Marcia's sweater.
396
00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:38,790
But, Marcia...
Okay, kids, okay.
397
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:40,125
Mom, we made
a deal, remember?
398
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:41,126
Yes, I remember.
399
00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,544
And I'm sticking to it.
400
00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:45,088
Jan, do you want to stick to it?
401
00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:46,673
Yes.
402
00:16:46,715 --> 00:16:48,800
Fine. I'll just take
my invisible sweater
403
00:16:48,842 --> 00:16:50,552
and... vanish.
404
00:16:52,262 --> 00:16:52,637
That's not fair.
405
00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:54,889
I'm afraid
it is, honey.
406
00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:58,101
You can't have
it both ways.
407
00:16:58,143 --> 00:17:04,024
So long.
408
00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,275
Finish your second hamburger
already parnter?
409
00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:06,985
yup
410
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:10,113
for little varmet you've got the
fastest mouth in the west
411
00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:12,365
I'm sorry I'm late Alice
412
00:17:12,407 --> 00:17:13,616
I guess Bobby ate the last
hamburger
413
00:17:13,658 --> 00:17:21,708
Ah remember honey I came from a
large family myself and it
teaches you to be ready for any
emergency
414
00:17:21,750 --> 00:17:24,419
this is the last hamburger
415
00:17:24,461 --> 00:17:25,879
thank you
416
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:30,133
now I can't tell you where I
have them stashed but incase you
need them I've also got the last
pare, the last peach and the
417
00:17:30,175 --> 00:17:32,135
last banana
418
00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:35,138
Pass the potato chips Bobby
419
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,973
I said pass the potato chips
420
00:17:37,015 --> 00:17:39,768
Alice will you pass what her
name the potato chips?
421
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:42,270
they're right in front of you,
have your arms suddenly gone
short?
422
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:45,190
well you see I can't pass them
I'm not here
423
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:46,274
you're not here?
424
00:17:46,316 --> 00:17:47,984
tha's right
425
00:17:48,026 --> 00:17:49,027
how bout' you Jan are you here?
426
00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,153
of course I'm here
427
00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:52,906
you're here but he isn't. that's
right
428
00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:53,948
Hi, Alice.
429
00:17:53,990 --> 00:17:55,075
How about you, Greg?
430
00:17:55,116 --> 00:17:56,117
How about me, what?
431
00:17:56,159 --> 00:17:57,077
Are you here?
432
00:17:57,118 --> 00:17:58,328
He isn't here,
either.
433
00:17:58,370 --> 00:17:59,746
Yeah, that's right.
434
00:17:59,788 --> 00:18:01,206
Will somebody
please tell me
435
00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:02,957
what's not going
on around here?
436
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:05,210
I guess we should have
filled you in, Alice.
437
00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:07,128
Sit down and I'll explain.
438
00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:09,589
Before I sit down,
tell me one thing.
439
00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:12,801
What?
Is that chair here?
440
00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:15,804
( both laughing )
441
00:18:24,979 --> 00:18:26,356
( laughs )
442
00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:29,609
Right in the face.
443
00:18:29,651 --> 00:18:31,236
I wonder what kind
of pie that was.
444
00:18:31,277 --> 00:18:33,279
Wasn't that funny, Pete?
445
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:41,913
( dog barks on TV )
446
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,331
Isn't that terrific
447
00:18:43,373 --> 00:18:44,666
the way they can
make those dogs
448
00:18:44,708 --> 00:18:46,084
do those backflips?
449
00:18:46,126 --> 00:18:49,045
I wonder how they do that.
Isn't that cute, Cindy?
450
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,315
Hey, Marcia, would you...?
451
00:19:15,113 --> 00:19:16,531
MIKE:
Hi, honey,
I'm home.
452
00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:19,075
We're in here, Mike.
453
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:20,368
Hey, I do believe
454
00:19:20,410 --> 00:19:22,120
I've died and gone
to strawberry heaven.
455
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:23,121
You want a taste?
456
00:19:23,163 --> 00:19:25,540
Sure.
Okay.
457
00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:29,210
Mm, fantastic!
458
00:19:29,252 --> 00:19:32,339
Well, that's Grandma's
old recipe for you.
459
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:33,506
Try mine, Mr. Brady.
460
00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,759
Yeah.
461
00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:40,680
Alice, that's
out of this world.
462
00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:42,265
Good old
Aunt Millie.
463
00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:44,017
Do you think Alice's
tastes better than mine?
464
00:19:44,059 --> 00:19:44,726
Well, I didn't
say that, honey.
465
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,728
You mean Mrs.
Brady's tastes
better than mine?
466
00:19:46,770 --> 00:19:47,812
I didn't say that,
either.
467
00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:49,522
Well, uh,
what do you say?
468
00:19:49,564 --> 00:19:51,399
Tell it like it is, Mr. Brady.
469
00:19:51,441 --> 00:19:53,318
Well...
470
00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:54,861
Yes?
471
00:19:54,903 --> 00:19:56,363
Let me put it this way.
472
00:19:56,404 --> 00:19:57,447
Yes?
473
00:19:57,489 --> 00:19:57,989
I don't want to
scrub the kitchen.
474
00:19:57,989 --> 00:19:59,783
I don't want to
sleep in the den.
475
00:19:59,824 --> 00:20:01,034
I ain't saying.
476
00:20:01,910 --> 00:20:03,661
Chicken.
477
00:20:04,079 --> 00:20:07,582
On your mark,
get set... go!
478
00:20:07,624 --> 00:20:08,583
Go, Cindy, come on!
479
00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:10,126
Come on, Bobby!
Come on, Bobby!
480
00:20:10,168 --> 00:20:14,089
( shouting over each other )
481
00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:34,192
Hurry, go!
482
00:20:40,699 --> 00:20:42,492
PETER:
Come on, Bobby!
483
00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:46,538
Go! Go!
484
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:48,373
Catch 'em!
Catch 'em! Go!
485
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:50,458
MARCIA:
Good! Come on back!
486
00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:52,585
GREG:
Come on back!
487
00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:02,220
Hi, Dad.
488
00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:03,722
Hi, honey.
489
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:05,306
Mind if I watch?
490
00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:06,766
No.
491
00:21:06,808 --> 00:21:09,102
Not if you find
supermarkets
interesting.
492
00:21:09,144 --> 00:21:11,855
I'm crazy
about supermarkets.
493
00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:13,023
Wouldn't you
rather be doing
494
00:21:13,064 --> 00:21:15,275
something more
interesting?
495
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,694
Uh-uh. This is
very interesting.
496
00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:20,822
I think the kids
are out back
497
00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:22,323
practicing
the sack race.
498
00:21:22,365 --> 00:21:24,409
I know.
499
00:21:24,451 --> 00:21:26,369
Looks dull.
500
00:21:26,411 --> 00:21:27,620
( sniffles )
501
00:21:27,662 --> 00:21:29,873
Besides, they probably
wouldn't want me
502
00:21:29,914 --> 00:21:32,083
out there anyway.
503
00:21:33,835 --> 00:21:36,838
Well, you know,
sweetheart,
504
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,549
sometimes when
you make a deal
505
00:21:39,591 --> 00:21:41,885
that turns out badly,
506
00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:45,180
the best thing to do
is to get out of it.
507
00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:46,723
Did they say
it was a bad deal?
508
00:21:46,765 --> 00:21:50,352
No, no, no, but
you never know.
509
00:21:50,393 --> 00:21:53,813
Sometimes when you find
it's turned out badly,
510
00:21:53,855 --> 00:21:58,109
there's every chance
that, uh, they think
it has, too, huh?
511
00:21:58,151 --> 00:21:59,319
I don't know.
512
00:21:59,361 --> 00:22:00,987
Oh, come on, come on.
513
00:22:01,029 --> 00:22:04,032
You think
about it, hmm?
514
00:22:04,074 --> 00:22:05,992
Okay.
Here.
515
00:22:06,868 --> 00:22:07,952
Okay?
516
00:22:07,994 --> 00:22:09,079
Yeah.
517
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:11,539
Go get 'em.
518
00:22:15,627 --> 00:22:16,169
The boys
against the girls.
519
00:22:16,211 --> 00:22:18,922
Wait, wait, wait.
Cindy can't hop as far.
520
00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:21,216
Yeah, I have
shorter legs.
521
00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:23,927
( all shouting and arguing )
522
00:22:23,968 --> 00:22:25,553
Hold it, hold
it, hold it!
523
00:22:25,595 --> 00:22:26,137
Come on, Cindy,
we'll team up
524
00:22:26,179 --> 00:22:28,014
and we'll beat them.
I'll be the lineman.
525
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,432
Bobby, come on.
526
00:22:29,474 --> 00:22:31,559
GREG:
Hurry up.
527
00:22:31,601 --> 00:22:32,435
I'm going
to start right away.
528
00:22:32,477 --> 00:22:34,938
On your marks,
get set...
529
00:22:34,979 --> 00:22:36,106
go!
530
00:22:36,147 --> 00:22:37,649
( all shouting )
531
00:22:38,983 --> 00:22:39,984
Look out!
532
00:22:40,026 --> 00:22:41,486
No!
Come on!
533
00:22:41,528 --> 00:22:42,696
Move it, Jan!
534
00:22:42,737 --> 00:22:44,364
I won't! No!
Move it.
535
00:22:44,406 --> 00:22:46,866
No!
Run along,
Miss Only Child.
536
00:22:46,908 --> 00:22:50,328
Well, if I'm an only child,
this is my backyard.
537
00:22:50,370 --> 00:22:52,539
( all talking and shouting )
538
00:22:52,580 --> 00:22:53,206
All right!
539
00:22:53,248 --> 00:22:56,626
I'll get out of your way
on a couple of conditions.
540
00:22:56,668 --> 00:22:57,752
What?
541
00:22:57,794 --> 00:22:59,379
That you let me in the race.
542
00:22:59,421 --> 00:23:00,463
Yeah?
543
00:23:00,505 --> 00:23:01,840
And that you promise to be
544
00:23:01,881 --> 00:23:03,633
my brothers
and sisters again.
545
00:23:03,675 --> 00:23:06,428
Are you sure
that's what you want, Jan?
546
00:23:06,469 --> 00:23:07,679
Positive.
547
00:23:07,721 --> 00:23:09,389
Once you've been pushed around
548
00:23:09,431 --> 00:23:10,890
by brothers and sisters
like you,
549
00:23:10,932 --> 00:23:12,475
you sure do miss it.
550
00:23:12,517 --> 00:23:13,810
Nice to have
you back.
551
00:23:13,852 --> 00:23:15,520
GREG:
Hey, Jan,
grab a sack.
552
00:23:15,562 --> 00:23:16,855
I'll be
your partner!
553
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:18,023
Wait a minute,
wait a minute.
554
00:23:18,064 --> 00:23:20,608
I forgot something.
I'll be right back.
555
00:23:21,943 --> 00:23:23,153
Hey, where are
you going, honey?
556
00:23:23,194 --> 00:23:24,696
To call Donna to tell her
I can't stay over
557
00:23:24,738 --> 00:23:25,989
because I'm going
to the hoedown.
558
00:23:26,031 --> 00:23:27,490
Oh, that's
terrific!
Hey!
559
00:23:27,532 --> 00:23:29,451
Hey, I've got an idea.
560
00:23:29,492 --> 00:23:30,452
Is it okay
if I invite Donna
561
00:23:30,493 --> 00:23:31,619
to come with us?
562
00:23:31,661 --> 00:23:32,245
Sure. That's
a good idea.
563
00:23:32,245 --> 00:23:36,041
Good. Then she won't be
an only child, either.
564
00:23:36,082 --> 00:23:37,542
GREG:
Hey, Alice.
565
00:23:37,584 --> 00:23:38,668
Why don't you
fill in for Jan?
566
00:23:38,710 --> 00:23:41,212
I need a partner.
567
00:23:41,254 --> 00:23:42,756
Oh, no. No thanks.
568
00:23:42,797 --> 00:23:44,257
Oh, go on, Alice.
Oh, come on.
569
00:23:44,299 --> 00:23:45,633
You can do it.
Chicken, chicken,
chicken, chicken.
570
00:23:45,675 --> 00:23:47,510
All right,
I'll give it a try.
571
00:23:49,596 --> 00:23:52,015
Hey, what are we
standing here for?
572
00:23:52,057 --> 00:23:53,099
That looks like fun.
573
00:23:53,141 --> 00:23:54,351
Well, I'm game
if you are.
574
00:23:54,392 --> 00:23:55,935
Come on.
575
00:23:55,977 --> 00:24:00,231
On your mark,
get set, go!
576
00:24:20,126 --> 00:24:20,794
( all talking excitedly )
577
00:24:20,794 --> 00:24:24,381
I know why they only
have this hoedown
once a year.
578
00:24:24,422 --> 00:24:25,674
Why?
Whew! Takes
that long
579
00:24:25,715 --> 00:24:27,550
for your feet
to recover.
580
00:24:27,592 --> 00:24:29,302
Okay, everybody,
it's been a big night.
581
00:24:29,344 --> 00:24:29,928
Let's hit the sack.
582
00:24:29,928 --> 00:24:32,013
PETER:
Okay, Dad, we'll
be up in a minute.
583
00:24:32,055 --> 00:24:34,140
( all talking )
584
00:24:34,182 --> 00:24:35,266
( Alice whistles )
585
00:24:35,308 --> 00:24:35,850
Hold it, gang, hold it!
586
00:24:35,850 --> 00:24:38,520
Now, look, I've had
a long, hard day,
587
00:24:38,561 --> 00:24:40,563
and I am pooped, so please,
until tomorrow morning,
588
00:24:40,605 --> 00:24:41,356
it's my turn
to be invisible.
589
00:24:41,356 --> 00:24:43,483
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