Original subtitles

♪ Here's the story ♪

♪ Of a lovely lady ♪

♪ Who was bringing up ♪

♪ Three very lovely girls ♪

♪ All of them had hair of gold ♪

♪ Like their mother ♪

♪ The youngest one in curls ♪

♪ It's the story of a man named Brady ♪

♪ Who was busy with three boys of his own ♪

♪ They were four men living all together ♪

♪ Yet they were all alone ♪

♪ Till the one day when the lady met this fellow ♪

♪ And they knew that it was much more than a hunch ♪

♪ That this group must somehow form a family ♪

♪ That's the way we all became the Brady Bunch ♪

♪ The Brady Bunch ♪

♪ The Brady Bunch ♪

♪ That's the way we became the Brady Bunch. ♪

Honey, your head is drooping.

Hmm?

I said your head's drooping.

Sweetheart, all of me is drooping.

Even Michelangelo went to bed.

I thought your sculpture class exhibit

was on Saturday.

It is, honey

but it'll take a whole day

to bake your head in the kiln.

It has to be fired.

Listen, if I don't get up in the morning

and finish that design

my boss is going to fire me.

Okay. You promise you'll pose tomorrow?

Yes, I promise.

Gee, it's beginning to look like a real head, huh?

Yeah. Whose?

( creaking )

( creaking continues )

( whispers ): Somebody's in the attic!

Who could it be?

I don't know.

( screams )

What?

( girls exclaiming )

What is the matter?

What happened?

We saw a ghost!

It was right outside the window.

CINDY: It was dancing in the tree!

Calm down, It'll be all right.

I didn't see a thing, Dad.

It was the biggest ghost

you ever saw.

I think it was probably

just the moonlight shining in the trees.

No, Dad, we heard it

in the attic first.

Carol: Oh honey, on a dark windy night your imagination can play all sorts of tricks on you.

I didn't hear a thing Mom.

Well, we did. You were asleep when it was walking around.

Walking, dancing? Mike, that was a very energetic ghost.

I wonder why we can't hear it or see it now.

It's probably back in the attic. Resting...

Well, there's one way to find out:

Go up in the attic and take a look.

No. Not me.

I'll wait till morning.

Kids, how many times have I told you:

There's no such thing as a ghost.

What's the matter Mr. Brady.

It's alright Alice. The kids just thought they saw a ghost outside.

Oh... Ghost are no such things kids..

We saw it Alice... Honest.

Well maybe I just left one of my night gowns hanging on the outside

That'll scare anybody in the dark.

Well everything is under control now Alice. Thanks for checking.

Let's have a look in the attic.

Yeah, you kids go on to bed, we'll take care of it.

Greg: What's... what's happening, Dad?

Nothing. The girls had a little scare.

Are they okay?

Yes. They're fine.

Go on back to bed.

Whoo! Whoo!

We scared them.

Yeah. Did you hear them scream?

( mimicking girls' screams )

Shh! Shh!

Now, I wonder

who could have left this window open.

( chair creaks )

Hey, look.

( creaking continues )

I think we found our ghost.

So what did you find?

Nothing-- the creaking you heard was the rocking chair.

But who was in it?

Nobody.

How do you know?

Well, because the seat

was all covered with dust.

Ghosts don't leave any marks

when they sit down.

Everybody knows that.

Okay, girls, there is nothing in the attic

and there's nothing in the trees outside

so let's all go back to sleep, huh?

Right-- and dream of nice things.

Good night.

Good night, girls.

See you in the morning.

JAN: Good night.

( boys giggling )

You know, I think our ghosts are right in there.

Mm-hmm. All three of them.

I bet we don't see any more ghosts tonight.

What makes you so sure?

I have a feeling they're all asleep.

In the attic?

No. Across the hall-- Greg, Peter and Bobby.

I bet they rigged up this whole thing.

You're right!

They're always playing tricks on us.

Those monsters.

Are you sure?

Tomorrow, we'll do a little detective work

and I bet we can prove this whole thing.

That's right; we don't have

any ghosts in our house.

We have three rats.

Jan, you look in the closet.

Cindy, check under the beds.

And I'll take the dresser drawers.

Okay.

What are we looking for?

I'm not sure, but I bet we find it.

Hey, I found something.

What's a slide projector doing

under Greg's bed?

It's usually in the family room.

Hey, there's a slide in it.

Look at this!

It's somebody with a sheet over his head.

CINDY: Yeah, it's one of the boys under a sheet.

So that's how they did it.

They aimed the projector out of the window onto the tree.

That's our ghost-- Peter with a sheet.

But how do you explain

the creaking in the attic?

It still could have been the rocking chair.

The boys could have moved it from down here with this rope.

How?

Well, let's say this is the rocking chair

and they did this.

It would rock.

And when they finished, the rope would disappear.

That's really smart.

What?

Dirty, but smart.

Dirty's right.

We've got to get back at them.

Yeah, give them a dose of their own medicine.

Excuse me, folks.

I hate to disturb the artist at work

but you left the dinner table

before dessert.

No, thanks, Alice. Not for me.

Yeah, well, I'll have mine. Mm-hmm!

Boy, that's coming along just fine...

Yeah. Thanks.

Whoever it is.

Mike, would you hold your mouth still, please?

Why don't you work on the forehead?

Honey, I have to work on the whole face at the same time.

Do an ear.

Oh, Mike, please?

Listen, I thought it was the artist

who was supposed to starve-- not the model.

I'll give you a bite.

No, thank you.

GREG: Here it is!

( kids exclaiming )

Are you still scared, Cindy?

Boy, I don't think

I want to go to sleep tonight.

PETER: How come?

Because of that ghost.

I think we ought to lock our windows and doors.

ALICE: I think you girls

are scaring yourselves worse

than that nonexistent ghost did.

No such thing as ghosts. Right, fellows?

BOYS: Right.

Just the same

I'll never go in that attic again.

Me, neither-- not with that ghost around.

Maybe we ought to charge him rent.

( laughing )

I'll bet you guys wouldn't go up in the attic.

She's putting us on.

At night.

With all the lights out.

Anytime.

I'll bet you guys wouldn't.

I'll bet we would.

Okay, I'll bet you my allowance

you guys won't go up there

and spend a night.

Me, too.

Me, too.

You're kidding.

Your whole allowances?

I'm not afraid of any ghosts in the attic are you guys?

No way! Sounds like easy money to me.

Me too!

Okay, our allowance against yours

we won't spend the night in the attic.

All three of you, all night.

Right!

Right! Right!

Alice will hold the money.

Fine.

Please?

Is it ok

I don't know

Who's idea was this

The girls.

What a sinch bet.

And it's for their own good if we survive they'll know the attic isn't haunted.

Oh isn't that heroic of them.

And who's going to help the girls get over their disappointment when

they lose their allowance

Poorer, but wiser which is more important?

Ya

Ya.

Ya,

What do you say honey?

Cmon.

Since tomorrow isn't a school day okay.

Thanks mom. Thanks dad. Bye.

It'll give the girls a chance to get even too.

Ya. I know what's going to happen, but you can count on it.

Okay, you guys, that ought to do it.

Well, thanks, Alice.

I'd sure say the girls made a sucker bet.

Yeah, we should have

bet our allowances

for the whole year!

I can count the money now.

Yeah, well, good night, guys

and don't be afraid of things

that go bump in the night.

Good night, Alice.

Thanks.

Okay, ghosts, come and get us!

Bobby.

What?

Boo.

Oh!

( giggling )

They're all up there.

All systems are go.

You mean, "all systems are ghost."

I feel warm.

Very warm.

Air I must have air.

Hello.

Let me out! I must get out!

Get out and be quiet!

Huh?

I said go to sleep and be quiet.

What are you yelling about I am asleep.

Stop talking in your sleep.

I'm burning up.

I've got to get out.

Bobby, will you stop blabbering!

I'm not blabbering!

I must have air.

Give me air.

( whispering ): Who said that?

I thought it was you.

( ghostly moaning )

Let me out.

( creaking )

I'm burning up.

I must rise and walk the night.

I'm free.

I'm free at last.

Greg!

Wake up, Greg!

Wake up, Greg!

( yelling )

What's going on?

( screaming )

Well, here it is-- round two

of the battle of the ghosts.

Boy, that was close!

Where's Greg?

Greg, are you still in there?

MIKE: Boys, boys, what's going on?

There's a ghost in the attic!

It came out of the old trunk.

( yawning ): What are guys doing down here?

It's safer down here that it is up there.

Then you lost the bet.

You didn't stay up there.

Okay, kids, ghost time's over.

Come on.

For good.

Come on.

( gasps )

Cellophane wrapping paper...

two fish lines.

They go up over that beam, out the window

and down to the girls' room.

How did they get the voice in the trunk?

Ah! Look. Tape recorder.

We ran the line down to our room

and then turned it on when we were ready.

Very ingenious.

That's no fair. You tricked us.

Well, you tricked us.

Okay, everybody's even now. Joke over.

Yeah, fun is fun

but you can carry joking too far.

Somebody could end up getting hurt.

I want you to promise me

there'll be no more scaring each other.

But the girls will get our allowances.

May I remind you of your famous quote?

"Poorer but wiser-- which is more important?"

Zapped again.

Thanks, Alice.

I said it was a sucker's bet.

You said they were making the sucker's bet.

Anybody who believes in ghosts is a sucker.

Alice, aren't you scared of anything?

Nope.

Oh, come on.

What about horror movies and vampires?

Vampires give me a pain in the neck.

( laughing ): That's pretty good.

What about werewolves?

All bark, no bite.

Boy, Alice, when you're hot, you're hot.

All bark, no bite...

I don't believe her.

Me, neither.

I'll bet, if she saw something really scary

she'd break the record for the mile run.

Hey...

What?

Want to try

and make her run?

We promised Mom and Dad no more scaring.

We promised we wouldn't scare each other.

We didn't say anything about Alice.

( telephone ringing )

Brady residence.

Oh, hi, Sam.

Sure, I'd love to go to a movie tonight.

Which one?

Well, uh... if it's my choice

I'll take the drive-in movie where we've both seen the movie.

Okay... bye, Sam.

Hi, Alice.

Oh, Mrs. Brady, I didn't hear you drive up.

Thanks.

You finished Mr. Brady's head.

Fresh out of the oven.

It looks more like it's fresh out of the hospital.

Let's take it in the living room.

Mrs. Brady, if it's okay

I'd like to go to a movie with Sam.

Oh, sure.

Mr. Brady and I

are going to the sculpture exhibit.

Perfect.

Mom and Dad will be gone all evening

and Alice will be out for a couple of hours.

That gives us plenty of time.

Wait till Alice gets back.

Yeah, let's see how she really acts with ghosts.

JAN: I hope you win.

Now, listen, if you need anything

Alice is at the movies

and your mother and I are at the exhibit.

CAROL: Be nice to one another.

And don't tear up the house.

Right. Dad, bye.

Have a good time.

Good-bye.

Let's get ready for Alice.

If Mom and Dad find out...

There's no way.

Alice's movie is over at 9:15.

Mom and Dad will be back way after that.

And Alice won't tell on us.

She couldn't. When we get through with her

she'll be sp-sp-speechless.

How does it look?

Real creepy.

Yeah. This ought to flip Alice out.

( chuckling )

Okay, give me the sheet.

Ah!

Okay.

Boy, this is going to scare her.

There.

How does that look?

It looks a little bit long.

Of course.

Did you ever see a ghost

in a mini-sheet?

( screaming )

Okay, one more time.

( screaming )

I think that's enough.

Boy, I scream great.

I almost scared myself.

( hammering )

Okay, it's all tied up.

Bring him up.

I think he looks spooky going up in the light.

Wait till Alice sees it

coming down in the dark.

Okay, now, Alice comes in

and the room is dark.

The lights won't work

so she heads for the fuse box like this.

When she gets just about here

I hit the skull light!

And I flip the switch

and my scream goes off.

You mean my scream.

Alice turns towards the screams like this...

and we let the ghost downstairs.

Boy, I kind of wish

it was happening to me.

Okay, now everybody in their places.

We've spun our web.

Now all we have to do is wait for the fly.

I hope the kids are still up

so I can show them my ribbon.

They're probably in bed. All the lights are out.

They couldn't have been in bed long.

It's still early.

( laughs )

Here comes Alice.

( clicking light switch )

( screaming )

Guess who's at it again?

Oh, no...

it's Mom and Dad.

Boy, are we in for it.

I think I'd better go fix the lights

so we can see who to yell at.

( screams stop )

( door opening )

( humming )

Who's that?

Is somebody there?

What's this?

Oh, no!

Is that the bust?

Mike's head!

Mrs. Brady, I'm sorry.

It looked like a real man

there in the dark.

Well, it wasn't your fault, Alice.

( louder ): Was it, kids?

No, sir. We had it all rigged up to scare her.

Like I said, if you carry a joke too far...

somebody can get hurt.

We never thought it would be Dad's head.

Gee. It won a prize, too.

Well...

so much for third place.

All right, that does it.

Everybody upstairs.

No allowance for two weeks--

and that goes for all of you.

Come on, come on.

Come on.

BOBBY: There goes my model airplane.

JAN: I guess we deserve it.

That's one of my good sheets.

Oh...

It's for my jelly bread.

More coffee, anybody?

No, Alice, thanks. No, thanks, Alice.

Gee, I feel so guilty

about what happened last night, folks.

Alice, don't worry about it.

You'll both be happy to know

I'm starting a new project today.

We fixed it.

We put Dad back together.

Hey...

Well, thanks for trying.

That looks like I sometime feel

when I get up in the morning.

Yes, it does.

Hi, honey!

Carol?

Alice?

CAROL: In here, honey.

( chuckling ): Alice, what in the world are you supposed to be?

I am a classical Greek, Mr. Brady.

I'm starting a new project.

Oh, yeah?

I'm sculpting a Greek statue.

What's it for?

It's for the backyard.

I'm going to put a large bowl under it

and then I can use it

for one of two things.

Such as?

Well, for one, a birdbath.

( chuckling ): A birdbath...

What else?

Well, if I pucker up, I can be a fountain.