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♪ Here's the story ♪
2
00:00:04,170 --> 00:00:05,672
♪ Of a lovely lady ♪
3
00:00:05,714 --> 00:00:07,257
♪ Who was bringing up ♪
4
00:00:07,298 --> 00:00:09,384
♪ Three very lovely girls ♪
5
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:12,053
♪ All of them had
hair of gold ♪
6
00:00:12,095 --> 00:00:14,180
♪ Like their mother ♪
7
00:00:14,222 --> 00:00:17,017
♪ The youngest one
in curls ♪
8
00:00:17,058 --> 00:00:21,021
♪ It's the story
of a man named Brady ♪
9
00:00:21,062 --> 00:00:25,025
♪ Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
10
00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:28,611
♪ They were four men
living all together ♪
11
00:00:28,653 --> 00:00:31,072
♪ Yet they
were all alone ♪
12
00:00:31,114 --> 00:00:35,368
♪ Till the one day
when the lady met this fellow ♪
13
00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:39,164
♪ And they knew that it was
much more than a hunch ♪
14
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:43,793
♪ That this group
must somehow form a family ♪
15
00:00:43,835 --> 00:00:46,546
♪ That's the way we all
became the Brady Bunch ♪
16
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:49,007
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
17
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,134
♪ The Brady Bunch ♪
18
00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:56,848
♪ That's the way
we became the Brady Bunch. ♪
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00:00:56,890 --> 00:01:01,269
Captioning sponsored by
PARAMOUNT TELEVISION
20
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:12,489
Hi.
21
00:01:12,530 --> 00:01:13,448
Hi.
22
00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:14,491
What are
you doing?
23
00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:15,075
Tightening a clamp.
24
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:17,327
This is my
new friend
Kerry Hathaway.
25
00:01:17,368 --> 00:01:19,079
She just moved to
the neighborhood.
26
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:20,371
This is my
brother Greg.
27
00:01:20,413 --> 00:01:21,790
I'm pleased
to meet you.
28
00:01:21,831 --> 00:01:22,749
Likewise.
29
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:25,085
Come and meet
everybody else.
30
00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:31,424
Hi.
31
00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:48,233
Kerry,
I'd like
you to meet
32
00:01:48,274 --> 00:01:50,151
my mother
and Cindy
and Bobby.
33
00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:51,236
Hi.
Hi.
34
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:52,237
Hi, Kerry.
35
00:01:52,278 --> 00:01:53,738
Welcome to
the neighborhood.
36
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:54,948
Thanks,
Mrs. Brady.
37
00:01:54,989 --> 00:01:57,826
Would you girls
like something to eat?
38
00:01:57,867 --> 00:01:59,202
KERRY:
I'm not hungry.
39
00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:00,203
JAN:
Me either.
40
00:02:00,245 --> 00:02:02,080
We're going to
go do homework.
41
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:03,289
CAROL:
Good.
42
00:02:03,331 --> 00:02:04,666
It was nice meeting you.
43
00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:06,626
( whispers ):
Wow!
44
00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:07,627
See you later.
45
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:08,586
Okay, honey.
46
00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,088
Bye.
47
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,131
Oh, Peter, this is
48
00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:12,715
my new friend
Kerry Hathaway.
49
00:02:12,757 --> 00:02:14,384
This is my
brother Peter.
50
00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:15,802
Hi.
51
00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:18,096
Pleased to meet me.
52
00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:22,100
( quavers )
53
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:24,144
( both start giggling )
54
00:02:51,629 --> 00:02:53,464
Jan, could
I talk to you?
55
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:55,175
Sure, but
make it quick.
56
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,135
I've got a lot
of homework.
57
00:02:57,177 --> 00:03:00,013
Marcia, could we
have some privacy?
58
00:03:00,054 --> 00:03:01,097
Hey!
59
00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:02,557
Sounds pretty
confidential.
60
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:03,683
It is.
61
00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:05,810
Then, I wouldn't
dream of leaving.
62
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,353
Come on, Peter,
what is it?
63
00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:08,354
Marcia, please?
64
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:09,731
Oh, come on, Pete.
65
00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:11,774
I won't blab.
I promise.
66
00:03:11,816 --> 00:03:14,277
Well, I guess it's okay.
67
00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:16,779
What it is is... is...
68
00:03:16,821 --> 00:03:20,992
well, it's sort of
about Kerry Hathaway.
69
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:22,243
Who's Kerry Hathaway?
70
00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:23,620
She's my
new classmate.
71
00:03:23,661 --> 00:03:24,996
What about her, Peter?
72
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,998
Well, I was wondering if...
73
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:32,378
you know, if she'd like to go to
a movie or something... with me?
74
00:03:32,420 --> 00:03:33,463
How should I know?
75
00:03:33,504 --> 00:03:34,297
Why not ask her?
76
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:35,924
What if she
turns me down?
77
00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:37,508
Why would she
turn you down?
78
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:38,760
You're a nice guy.
79
00:03:38,801 --> 00:03:41,095
Yeah, all the girls
think you're cute.
80
00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:42,180
They do?
81
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:42,680
MARCIA:
Sure.
82
00:03:42,680 --> 00:03:44,891
You've got a great
personality.
83
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:46,059
You're lots of fun
to be with.
84
00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:47,143
That's right.
85
00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,603
You're kind
and considerate.
86
00:03:48,645 --> 00:03:50,647
Yeah, that's true, too.
87
00:03:50,688 --> 00:03:51,814
Well, go phone her.
88
00:03:51,856 --> 00:03:53,233
Her number's
in the book downstairs.
89
00:03:53,274 --> 00:03:54,317
Okay, I will.
90
00:03:55,526 --> 00:03:56,986
This is going to be the most
91
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:57,987
important phone call I ever
92
00:03:58,029 --> 00:04:01,366
made my whole entire life.
93
00:04:01,407 --> 00:04:04,702
(Giggles)
94
00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:08,581
( phone rings )
95
00:04:08,623 --> 00:04:09,582
Hello.
96
00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:10,541
Kerry?
97
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:11,542
This is Kerry.
98
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:14,170
Hi, this is Pete.
99
00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:15,171
Pete who?
100
00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:16,297
Peter Brady.
101
00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:17,298
You met me this afternoon.
102
00:04:17,340 --> 00:04:19,175
I'm Jan's brother.
103
00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:19,759
Oh, you must be
104
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,178
the cute little one
with the freckles.
105
00:04:22,220 --> 00:04:25,181
No, that's my brother Bobby.
106
00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:25,974
Oh!
107
00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:28,810
Then you're the groovy-looking
guy who was fixing the car.
108
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:32,188
No, that's my brother Greg.
109
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:34,524
Then which one are you?
110
00:04:34,565 --> 00:04:38,194
I'm the one
who'd better say good-bye.
111
00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,821
Good-bye.
112
00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:46,119
( knocks lightly )
113
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:47,078
Hi, Dad.
114
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,204
Hey!
115
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,123
How come you're
so dressed up?
116
00:04:50,164 --> 00:04:52,208
Trying to get thrown
out of school?
117
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,002
I'm trying to
sort of, you know
118
00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:55,211
impress
a certain girl
119
00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:56,629
and I was wondering...
120
00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:57,922
Yeah,
wondering what?
121
00:04:57,964 --> 00:05:01,134
Dad, can I borrow some
after-shave lotion?
122
00:05:01,175 --> 00:05:02,385
Did you shave?
123
00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:03,553
Do you have to shave
124
00:05:03,594 --> 00:05:05,179
to use
after-shave lotion?
125
00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:06,055
( chuckles )
126
00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,473
Come to think
of it, no.
127
00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:09,851
I got just the thing
for you back here.
128
00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:11,519
She's really
something special
129
00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:13,646
so I thought I'd
better look special
130
00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:15,106
and smell special, too.
131
00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:16,232
Now, listen, Peter.
132
00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:17,525
If you want
to impress her
133
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,193
you use just
a little of this.
134
00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:20,611
How come
just a little?
135
00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,989
Well, like it says
in the TV commercial
136
00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:24,032
if you use a lot
137
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:25,700
you'll have to
fight off women
138
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:27,160
with a whip
and a chair.
139
00:05:27,201 --> 00:05:29,037
Well, since
I just met her
140
00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:32,040
maybe I should
start slow and build.
141
00:05:32,081 --> 00:05:33,958
Yeah, that's
good thinking.
142
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,418
Hey, that smells good.
143
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,215
Insurance.
144
00:06:03,738 --> 00:06:05,156
Kerry.
145
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:07,241
Small world.
146
00:06:07,283 --> 00:06:08,326
Hi.
147
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,744
Don't you
recognize me?
148
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:11,037
I'm Jan's
brother Pete.
149
00:06:11,079 --> 00:06:12,080
Oh, I'm sorry.
150
00:06:12,121 --> 00:06:13,748
You must have
been the boy
151
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,166
who called last night.
152
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:16,167
Yeah.
153
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:18,211
I've met so many
new kids in school
154
00:06:18,252 --> 00:06:19,754
I can't keep
them straight.
155
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:20,838
That's okay.
156
00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:24,717
( sniffs )
157
00:06:24,759 --> 00:06:26,928
( sniffs )
158
00:06:26,969 --> 00:06:28,137
Oh... oh, yeah.
159
00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:29,347
After-shave lotion.
160
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:30,681
You like it, huh?
161
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:32,141
Do you shave?
162
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,643
Oh, yeah,
all the time.
163
00:06:33,684 --> 00:06:36,104
My dad and I use
the same brand.
164
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:38,689
Let me carry your books.
165
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:40,191
That's okay,
I can...
166
00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,025
( books thud )
167
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:44,153
Gee, I'm sorry.
168
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:46,406
Let me wipe them off.
169
00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:47,865
Don't bother.
170
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,826
I insist.
171
00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:54,038
Here, hold these.
172
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,332
I'll get them
real clean.
173
00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:58,876
( screams )
174
00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,753
Wow.
175
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,967
Stop it!
176
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:08,845
Now look
what you've done!
177
00:07:10,513 --> 00:07:13,933
Can't I do anything right?
178
00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,271
Hi, honey, I'm home!
179
00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:19,605
Hi!
180
00:07:19,647 --> 00:07:20,982
( giggles )
181
00:07:23,192 --> 00:07:25,278
Gosh, hey, that's
some special kiss.
182
00:07:25,319 --> 00:07:27,113
Yeah, I'm glad
you liked it.
183
00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,281
Yeah, I did...
184
00:07:28,322 --> 00:07:29,323
Uh-oh, you've got
185
00:07:29,365 --> 00:07:31,200
something to tell
me, don't you?
186
00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:33,453
Yeah, guess where we're
going Friday night.
187
00:07:33,494 --> 00:07:34,537
Um, the new play.
188
00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:35,621
You got tickets?
189
00:07:35,663 --> 00:07:36,956
I've got tickets...
190
00:07:36,998 --> 00:07:38,040
hey, great.
191
00:07:38,082 --> 00:07:38,583
But not to the play.
192
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:41,627
I have tickets
to that modern art show.
193
00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:42,712
Oh, honey, come on!
194
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:43,963
Not another show
195
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:46,090
where soup cans crushed
wins first prize.
196
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:48,050
Oh, Mike, I had
to buy the tickets.
197
00:07:48,092 --> 00:07:49,135
It's for charity.
198
00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,303
Couldn't we stay home
199
00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:52,054
and crush
our own soup cans?
200
00:07:52,096 --> 00:07:53,973
Oh, Mike, they'll
be expecting us.
201
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,224
( moans )
202
00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:56,517
Hi, Peter.
Hi, Pete.
203
00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:57,852
( dejectedly ):
Hi.
204
00:07:57,894 --> 00:07:59,145
Hey, what's
the matter?
205
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,022
Didn't the shaving
lotion work?
206
00:08:01,063 --> 00:08:02,106
Oh, it smelled okay
207
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,524
but I sure
stunk it up.
208
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:05,193
I can't even
talk to her!
209
00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:05,735
Now, wait
a minute.
210
00:08:05,776 --> 00:08:08,029
Don't get uptight
about it, listen.
211
00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:10,031
Do you know
that when I
was your age
212
00:08:10,072 --> 00:08:12,074
I had
the same problem
with a girl.
213
00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:13,034
You did?
214
00:08:13,075 --> 00:08:15,703
Yes, I did-- Polly Ledbetter.
215
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:16,871
Polly Ledbetter!
216
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,331
That was
her name.
217
00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:21,000
When we got close,
I got a knot in my tongue
218
00:08:21,042 --> 00:08:23,169
I could have won
a merit badge with.
219
00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:23,836
What'd you do about it?
220
00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:27,423
I just figured if I couldn't
say what I wanted to
221
00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:29,008
I could always write it.
222
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,301
So I wrote her a letter.
223
00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,803
A letter, huh?
224
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:35,097
Uh-huh, that way
you can take your time
225
00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,974
and think about what you'll say.
226
00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:38,226
That's a great idea!
227
00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:39,101
Thanks, Dad.
228
00:08:39,143 --> 00:08:40,853
Sure.
229
00:08:57,787 --> 00:08:58,996
What are you doing?
230
00:08:59,038 --> 00:09:00,498
Trying to
write a letter
231
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,041
or start
a paper drive?
232
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:04,085
It's a tough letter
to write, Alice.
233
00:09:04,126 --> 00:09:06,045
I don't want it
to sound corny.
234
00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:08,130
Well, want to try
it out on me?
235
00:09:08,172 --> 00:09:09,674
Okay.
236
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:13,219
"Dear Kerry..."
237
00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:14,178
Yeah?
238
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,304
That's it.
239
00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:16,889
That's where
I get stuck.
240
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:17,974
Oh!
241
00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:19,141
Oh, yeah, well...
242
00:09:19,183 --> 00:09:21,269
that first line is
always the toughest.
243
00:09:21,310 --> 00:09:23,187
I just don't know
what to say.
244
00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:25,648
Why don't you try
something poetic like
245
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,692
"how do I love thee?
246
00:09:27,733 --> 00:09:30,027
Let me count the ways."
247
00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:32,989
Great-- give it to me
again, slow.
248
00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:36,367
"How do I love thee?"
249
00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:43,082
Jan.
Hi.
250
00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:44,166
What did she say?
251
00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:45,293
Who?
252
00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:46,335
Kerry Hathaway.
253
00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:47,420
About what?
254
00:09:47,461 --> 00:09:48,546
About me.
255
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,798
Peter, we've got
a communication gap.
256
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:52,049
I wrote Kerry a letter
257
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,926
and I slipped it
into her locker.
258
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:56,137
I want to know what
she said about it.
259
00:09:56,178 --> 00:09:57,888
Oh, was it a gooey
love letter?
260
00:09:57,930 --> 00:09:59,140
Yeah, did she
mention it?
261
00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:00,224
She mentioned it.
262
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,601
Well, what'd she say?
263
00:10:01,642 --> 00:10:03,769
She said it was
beautifully written.
264
00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:04,812
Yeah?
265
00:10:04,854 --> 00:10:06,439
Super poetic
and fantastic.
266
00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:07,982
What else did she say?
267
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:12,028
That the dumb-dumb who wrote it
forgot to sign his name.
268
00:10:12,069 --> 00:10:13,863
Oh, no!
269
00:10:13,904 --> 00:10:16,032
How could I be so stupid?
270
00:10:16,073 --> 00:10:18,242
You must
practice a lot.
271
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:23,706
It's the perfect plan
and you're the perfect guy.
272
00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:25,416
No way, Pete.
No way.
273
00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:27,168
Where'd you get this weird idea?
274
00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:30,129
From this copy
of Cyrano de Bergerac.
275
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,255
Marcia put me
on to it.
276
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:32,298
It's great.
277
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:34,050
It's about
this guy with a big nose
278
00:10:34,091 --> 00:10:36,844
and he's in love
with this girl named Roxanne.
279
00:10:36,886 --> 00:10:38,012
Peter, I know the story.
280
00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:39,055
He's shy, see.
281
00:10:39,096 --> 00:10:40,723
So he hides
in some bushes
282
00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:42,892
and has this other
guy say to her...
283
00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:44,185
I said
I know the story.
284
00:10:44,226 --> 00:10:45,936
All I'm asking
you to do is
285
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,897
hide in the bushes
like Cyrano did
286
00:10:47,938 --> 00:10:50,107
and you feed me
the right words.
287
00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:53,944
When it comes to
smooth talking
the girls
288
00:10:53,986 --> 00:10:56,113
everybody says
you're the greatest.
289
00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:58,157
Yeah? Everybody says that?
290
00:10:58,199 --> 00:10:58,658
Everybody.
291
00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:01,160
They call you
"old silver tongue."
292
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:01,661
They do?
293
00:11:01,702 --> 00:11:03,913
You're a legend
in your own time.
294
00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:05,247
How about that?
295
00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:07,833
I really need help from
an expert like you.
296
00:11:07,875 --> 00:11:10,044
Well, okay, we'll try it.
297
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:11,629
If Cyrano
could do it
298
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,839
so can "Old Silver Tongue."
299
00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:18,010
( crickets chirping )
300
00:11:19,136 --> 00:11:20,930
( whispers ):
That's the one.
301
00:11:20,971 --> 00:11:22,306
( whispers ):
That's it?
302
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,683
Okay.
303
00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:25,184
Hide back here.
304
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:26,560
You're sure
I look okay?
305
00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:27,978
Peter, you look fine.
306
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:29,063
My hair?
307
00:11:29,105 --> 00:11:30,272
Does my hair
look okay?
308
00:11:30,314 --> 00:11:32,608
After 20 minutes
with Mom's hairdryer
309
00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:34,318
you couldn't
look any better.
310
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:36,153
You're sure
you thought up
311
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,030
some real poetic stuff?
312
00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:40,074
My stuff is better
than Cyrano's.
313
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:42,159
Remember your
first line?
314
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:42,993
Yeah.
315
00:11:43,035 --> 00:11:45,663
Well, here goes.
316
00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:51,043
( pebble taps )
317
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,586
( Pebble taps )
318
00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:54,004
( Pebble taps )
319
00:11:55,881 --> 00:11:57,717
( Quavers )
320
00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:59,301
Hello, lovely one.
321
00:12:01,178 --> 00:12:03,180
Peter? Is that you?
322
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:05,599
Yeah, could
I talk to you?
It's important.
323
00:12:05,641 --> 00:12:06,726
I guess so.
324
00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:08,602
Come around to the front.
325
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:10,229
No, wait.
326
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:12,231
I...
327
00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:13,858
I want
to see you here
328
00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:17,194
where your lovely hair
outshines the moonbeams.
329
00:12:17,236 --> 00:12:18,988
I want to see you here
330
00:12:19,029 --> 00:12:22,199
where your lovely hair
outshines the moonbeams.
331
00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,827
Peter, are you feeling okay?
332
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,370
How could I feel
otherwise
333
00:12:26,412 --> 00:12:29,540
when I'm so close
to your beauty?
334
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:33,627
How could I feel otherwise when
I'm so close to your beauty?
335
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:36,338
I've never seen you act
like this before.
336
00:12:36,380 --> 00:12:37,882
I'm not acting.
337
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:38,382
It's true love
338
00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:40,718
from the first time
I saw you.
339
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,011
I'm not acting.
340
00:12:42,052 --> 00:12:45,139
It's true love
from the first time I saw you.
341
00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:48,017
Peter, why are you standing
all the way over there?
342
00:12:48,058 --> 00:12:50,144
Why am I standing over here?
343
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:52,313
Distance lends
enchantment.
344
00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:54,774
Distance lends enchantment.
345
00:12:54,815 --> 00:12:57,777
What in the world is
going on out there?
346
00:12:57,818 --> 00:13:00,404
Just take
what i have to offer:
347
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:04,325
The rainbows, the sunlight,
my life, the world!
348
00:13:04,366 --> 00:13:08,078
Take my rainbows
and sun life.
349
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,122
That's not what I said.
350
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:12,124
The sunlight, rain and...
351
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:15,211
For crying out loud,
will ya listen?
352
00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:20,299
She's gone!
353
00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:23,093
I blew it again.
354
00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:25,262
Peter, what's
going on out here?
355
00:13:25,304 --> 00:13:27,223
Uh... hello,
lovely one.
356
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:32,770
Greg, what are you
doing here?
357
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,438
Well, he just...
358
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,273
I can explain
everything.
359
00:13:36,315 --> 00:13:38,025
Yeah, he can explain.
360
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:42,029
No, you don't
have to explain.
361
00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:44,490
I understand
everything now.
362
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:48,285
Oh, it's just
like Cyrano!
363
00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:50,704
Don't be shy, Greg.
364
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:55,376
You don't have to use
Peter to speak for you.
365
00:13:57,461 --> 00:13:59,088
Peter!
366
00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:10,683
Honey, I forgot to show you
this.
367
00:14:10,724 --> 00:14:12,059
Oh yeah, what is it?
368
00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:12,893
It's the brochure for the art
show Friday night.
369
00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:14,645
I thought you would like to see
some of the
370
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:15,646
paintings that are going to be
371
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:17,731
exibited.
372
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:20,109
You sure those are paintings?
373
00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:22,903
Looks more like a tabelcloth
after a spaghetti festival.
374
00:14:24,113 --> 00:14:25,990
Boy do I have a rat for a
brother.
375
00:14:26,031 --> 00:14:27,074
Wait a minute. What's the
matter with you?
376
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,785
Greg just hijacked my girl.
377
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:30,536
What do you mean?
378
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,122
He was supposed to help me
impress Kerry. Not himself.
379
00:14:34,081 --> 00:14:35,708
She's flipped over him.
380
00:14:35,749 --> 00:14:37,001
Where's Greg?
381
00:14:37,042 --> 00:14:39,503
With Kerry. She was hanging all
over him.
382
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:40,796
Well, what did you do about it?
383
00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:43,924
I left. What should I do? Take
pictures?
384
00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:45,009
Thanks for splitting and leaving
385
00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:46,385
me stuck with your girl.
386
00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:48,304
Oh you really look like you were
in pain.
387
00:14:48,345 --> 00:14:50,389
Thanks for stealing Kerry.
388
00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:51,640
I didn't steal her.
389
00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:53,976
You just borrowed her without
permission.
390
00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:57,104
Hold it you two, wait a minute
Greg what happened?
391
00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:58,898
Dad the whole thing was a big
mistake.
392
00:14:58,939 --> 00:15:00,232
I tried to straighten it out
393
00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:02,151
but Kerry wouldn't listen to a
word I said.
394
00:15:02,192 --> 00:15:03,944
I bet you did.
395
00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:05,821
Look pal I can't help it...
396
00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:06,780
Forget about it.
397
00:15:06,822 --> 00:15:07,865
Good night mom, night dad.
398
00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:09,783
Good night Greg.
399
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:13,120
Peter wait a minute.
400
00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:16,832
You know a guy can't always get
a girl to like him.
401
00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,043
Maybe you ought to forget about
this girl for now.
402
00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:22,004
Honey, there are a lot of other
fish in the sea.
403
00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:22,546
I know.
404
00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:25,341
But I got Moby Dick for a
brother.
405
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:27,426
Good night mom, good night dad.
406
00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:32,431
I would say I need two pounds of
rice.
407
00:15:32,473 --> 00:15:34,767
Two pounds of rice. Is that it
Alice?
408
00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:35,434
Except for some cake mix.
409
00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:39,313
I thought I'd make Peter a nice
gooey cake to help
410
00:15:39,355 --> 00:15:41,106
glue back together his poor
broken heart.
411
00:15:41,148 --> 00:15:44,485
Alice, you're the dear Abby of
the kitchen.
412
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:46,111
Hi mom, hi Alice.
413
00:15:46,153 --> 00:15:48,113
Hi sweetheart.
414
00:15:48,155 --> 00:15:49,281
How was school today?
415
00:15:49,323 --> 00:15:50,991
It was better in the afternoon
416
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:52,368
then it was in the morning.
417
00:15:52,409 --> 00:15:53,786
Oh why is that?
418
00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:55,871
I get out in the afternoon.
419
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,500
Has anybody seen my blue
sweater?
420
00:15:59,541 --> 00:16:00,876
Not since I washed it.
421
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:02,378
Oh I know where it is.
422
00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:03,420
Where?
423
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:05,047
Jan took it to Kerry Hathaway.
424
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:07,341
Kerry? What for?
425
00:16:07,383 --> 00:16:07,800
For measurments.
426
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,385
Kerry is sending you a new one.
427
00:16:09,426 --> 00:16:10,386
It's supposed to be a surprise.
428
00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:12,137
Not anymore.
429
00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:12,680
Say I almost forgot.
430
00:16:12,721 --> 00:16:15,641
Kerry dropped by and left this
for you.
431
00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:18,018
Home made fudge.
432
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:20,187
This is really getting to bug
me.
433
00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:22,731
I got to do something about that
girl.
434
00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:23,482
If you don't like her anymore
435
00:16:23,524 --> 00:16:25,526
can I have the fudge?
436
00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:30,739
Neat, huh?
437
00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:32,825
You're lucky
you're young, Bobby.
438
00:16:37,454 --> 00:16:40,040
I think it just
needs new brushes.
439
00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:41,625
Stay away from women, kid.
440
00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:43,836
They'll break your heart
every time.
441
00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:44,920
What are you
talking about?
442
00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:48,048
You're too young
to understand.
443
00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:50,300
GREG:
Peter... Pete...
444
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,635
I got a great idea
for you.
445
00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:53,137
If it's joining
the Foreign Legion
446
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,555
I've already
thought about it.
447
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:55,639
How would you like
to get Kerry back?
448
00:16:57,099 --> 00:16:57,558
Now, listen...
449
00:16:57,599 --> 00:17:00,102
I don't trust you.
You stole my girl.
450
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:01,353
I didn't steal
your girl!
451
00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:01,895
You did!
452
00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:03,564
If you guys are
starting that again
453
00:17:03,605 --> 00:17:04,732
I'm getting
out of here.
454
00:17:04,773 --> 00:17:05,149
Pete, listen...
455
00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:09,069
you got to
trust me, please.
456
00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:10,779
Well... okay.
457
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,031
But not around Kerry.
458
00:17:12,072 --> 00:17:13,365
I won't go near her.
459
00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:14,366
Jan will.
460
00:17:14,408 --> 00:17:15,534
Jan?
461
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:16,493
Jan's going to tell Kerry
462
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:18,203
that nobody trusts me
463
00:17:18,245 --> 00:17:21,040
that I'm a no-good,
double-crossing, two-timing rat.
464
00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:23,083
You mean she'll tell her
the truth.
465
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:24,084
Yeah!
466
00:17:24,126 --> 00:17:26,211
No... what I mean is
467
00:17:26,253 --> 00:17:28,714
after Kerry's convinced
that I'm a rat fink
468
00:17:28,756 --> 00:17:30,716
Jan'll tell her
what a great guy you are.
469
00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:31,425
She will?
470
00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:35,345
And Kerry will turn off of me
and turn on to you.
471
00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:37,931
Hey, yeah, that's a great idea.
472
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:39,683
You're a pretty nice brother
473
00:17:39,725 --> 00:17:41,769
for a no-good, double-crossing,
two-timing rat.
474
00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:47,149
Hi, Jan.
475
00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:48,859
Hi, Greg.
476
00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:50,152
When does Pete
take over?
477
00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:51,737
How does never sound?
478
00:17:51,779 --> 00:17:53,739
Never?
What went wrong?
479
00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:54,698
( dramatically ):
Kerry's going to save you
480
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:56,283
from your horrible self.
481
00:17:56,325 --> 00:17:57,618
She's going to change you.
482
00:17:57,659 --> 00:17:59,078
Terrific.
483
00:17:59,119 --> 00:17:59,745
Did you tell her
everything?
484
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:00,996
Everything.
485
00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,581
I don't understand it
486
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:03,665
unless she didn't
believe me.
487
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:07,211
Hey, wait--
maybe that's the trouble.
488
00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:08,962
Maybe she didn't believe you.
489
00:18:09,004 --> 00:18:11,882
Maybe she has to be shown
that I'm a rat fink.
490
00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:13,634
But how you going to show her?
491
00:18:13,675 --> 00:18:16,637
That's a good question.
492
00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:18,597
And I think I've got
a good answer.
493
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:20,390
Mom and Dad are
going to the art
show tonight, right?
494
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:20,974
So?
495
00:18:20,974 --> 00:18:22,601
Could you get Peter
out of the house?
496
00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:25,229
I guess so.
What are you going to do?
497
00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:26,605
I'll explain later.
498
00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:27,815
Now for the other woman.
499
00:18:27,856 --> 00:18:29,233
What other woman?
500
00:18:29,274 --> 00:18:30,400
Has Kerry ever met Marcia?
501
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:31,777
No. What other woman?
502
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:35,322
Great. I'll invite
Kerry over tonight.
503
00:18:35,364 --> 00:18:36,824
What other woman?!
504
00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:43,163
When you put on this wig
and some dark glasses
505
00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:44,790
Kerry will never know
who you are.
506
00:18:44,832 --> 00:18:46,583
I'm not sure Kerry
ever saw me.
507
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:48,961
We can't take any chances;
it's too important to Peter.
508
00:18:49,002 --> 00:18:52,172
Right. Okay.
Exit Marcia Brady.
509
00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:54,007
Enter the other woman.
510
00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:28,208
( puts on romantic music )
511
00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:30,043
( doorbell rings )
512
00:19:37,426 --> 00:19:38,385
Hi, doll.
513
00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:41,221
Hi. Thanks for inviting me over.
514
00:19:41,263 --> 00:19:44,600
Well, I believe in
spreading myself around.
515
00:19:44,641 --> 00:19:45,809
Super outfit.
516
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:48,854
Oh, these are
my working threads.
517
00:19:51,815 --> 00:19:53,859
Know what I mean?
518
00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:56,528
Where's everybody else?
519
00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:58,155
Out.
520
00:19:58,197 --> 00:19:59,156
We're all alone, kid.
521
00:19:59,198 --> 00:19:59,990
Groovy?
522
00:20:00,782 --> 00:20:02,826
Sit down.
523
00:20:06,371 --> 00:20:09,750
Now, I'd like to get
a few things straight.
524
00:20:09,791 --> 00:20:11,126
The way I see it
you're crazy about me
525
00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:13,337
and you want to
go steady, right?
526
00:20:13,378 --> 00:20:13,962
Well...
527
00:20:13,962 --> 00:20:16,131
well, I got a couple
rules you got to dig.
528
00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:17,299
Rules?
529
00:20:17,341 --> 00:20:20,761
Rule one: you go out
only with me.
530
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:22,721
Oh, I like that.
531
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:26,099
Rule two: I go out
with whoever I want.
532
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:28,143
That doesn't sound fair.
533
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:31,521
What do you want,
fair or me?
534
00:20:31,563 --> 00:20:33,607
Well...
535
00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:38,278
Now, let me tell you
about rule three.
536
00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:40,280
C-could we go back
to rule two?
537
00:20:40,322 --> 00:20:41,365
( doorbell rings )
538
00:20:43,533 --> 00:20:45,577
Don't move. I'll be right back.
539
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,132
Debbie, not you again!
540
00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:03,637
MARCIA:
Greg, I have
to talk to you.
541
00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:08,809
( gasps )
542
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:11,019
I might have known
I'd find another woman here.
543
00:21:12,020 --> 00:21:15,148
Well, you caught me
at a bad time.
544
00:21:15,190 --> 00:21:17,234
I usually have
three or four.
545
00:21:19,194 --> 00:21:21,738
Greg, you've got
to take me back.
546
00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:24,157
Give me one more chance.
547
00:21:24,199 --> 00:21:26,285
I'll do anything
you say.
548
00:21:26,326 --> 00:21:28,078
No way.
549
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,705
Debbie, you bore me.
550
00:21:29,746 --> 00:21:31,790
I'll change. I promise.
551
00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:35,711
Greg, maybe I should go.
552
00:21:35,752 --> 00:21:37,129
Nah.
553
00:21:37,170 --> 00:21:40,299
Stick around, kid.
Watch me throw her out.
554
00:21:40,340 --> 00:21:41,383
Come on, loser.
555
00:21:42,050 --> 00:21:44,720
Greg, if you drop
me, I don't know
what I'll do.
556
00:21:44,761 --> 00:21:46,805
I said out!
557
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:49,141
MIKE:
If that's art,
I'm Michelangelo.
558
00:21:49,182 --> 00:21:51,226
CAROL:
Oh, honey,
stop complaining.
559
00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:56,106
What is it, Alice?
560
00:21:56,148 --> 00:21:58,275
I think they're
rehearsing
561
00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,359
a teenage
soap opera.
562
00:22:00,235 --> 00:22:01,737
Greg!
563
00:22:01,778 --> 00:22:04,323
How can you treat
her like this?
564
00:22:04,364 --> 00:22:06,325
Out with the old
and in with the new.
565
00:22:06,366 --> 00:22:08,452
But this girl
loves you!
566
00:22:08,493 --> 00:22:09,453
MARCIA:
Oh, yes...
567
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:12,205
I do, I do, I do.
568
00:22:12,247 --> 00:22:15,000
If you don't like it,
you can leave.
569
00:22:15,042 --> 00:22:18,086
Greg Brady,
you're even worse
than Jan said.
570
00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,549
I never want
to see you again.
571
00:22:22,591 --> 00:22:24,426
You were right,
it is a soap opera.
572
00:22:24,468 --> 00:22:27,220
Come on, Debbie.
573
00:22:27,262 --> 00:22:28,138
What's going on?
574
00:22:28,180 --> 00:22:29,431
Uh... Peter...
575
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:32,434
Peter, you're supposed
to be at the library.
576
00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:33,894
I was.
577
00:22:33,935 --> 00:22:36,229
Marcia, what are you
doing in that wig?
578
00:22:36,271 --> 00:22:37,230
I'm not Marcia! I'm...
579
00:22:37,272 --> 00:22:38,273
She's Debbie.
580
00:22:38,315 --> 00:22:40,067
She's Debbie...
I'm Debbie.
581
00:22:40,108 --> 00:22:42,069
Something funny's
going on.
582
00:22:42,110 --> 00:22:44,112
You mean
something phony.
583
00:22:44,154 --> 00:22:45,572
That's my sister
584
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:47,824
in a wig.
585
00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:49,826
Your sister?!
586
00:22:53,330 --> 00:22:54,873
What's this
all about?
587
00:22:54,915 --> 00:22:56,083
( sighs )
588
00:22:56,124 --> 00:22:58,043
We were trying
to convince Kerry
589
00:22:58,085 --> 00:22:59,127
that I was
a rat fink.
590
00:22:59,169 --> 00:23:01,171
That's really dirty
591
00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:03,090
playing a trick
like this on her
592
00:23:03,131 --> 00:23:04,716
when she cares
about you.
593
00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:05,342
We're sorry, Kerry.
594
00:23:05,342 --> 00:23:08,512
If a girl as wonderful
as Kerry was my girl
595
00:23:08,553 --> 00:23:10,389
you know
how I'd treat her?
596
00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:13,558
I'd...
597
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:15,685
You'd what, Peter?
598
00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,231
I'd treat her
like a queen.
599
00:23:21,191 --> 00:23:24,778
Peter, could I ask
a favor?
600
00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:27,239
( nervously ):
Mmm... anything.
601
00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:28,990
Would you walk me home?
602
00:23:31,827 --> 00:23:34,955
Wow! Would I.
603
00:23:42,129 --> 00:23:44,631
For a minute there,
I thought we blew it.
604
00:23:44,673 --> 00:23:47,634
GREG:
Mom, Dad.
605
00:23:47,676 --> 00:23:51,096
I guess we
should explain.
606
00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:53,056
Well, I think
we understand.
607
00:23:53,098 --> 00:23:54,057
Good night, kids.
608
00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:55,517
Good night.
609
00:23:55,559 --> 00:23:56,768
Good night, Greg.
610
00:23:56,810 --> 00:23:58,270
Good night, Debbie.
611
00:24:13,326 --> 00:24:15,912
I really didn't have
any dessert last night
612
00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:17,747
so I think
I'd better have two.
613
00:24:17,789 --> 00:24:19,166
Two donuts?
614
00:24:19,207 --> 00:24:21,460
They give you lots
of energy, Mom.
615
00:24:21,501 --> 00:24:23,962
They give you lots
of energy, Mom.
616
00:24:24,004 --> 00:24:27,132
And with lots of energy,
you do more homework.
617
00:24:27,174 --> 00:24:29,843
With lots of energy,
you can do more homework.
618
00:24:29,885 --> 00:24:32,971
When you do more homework,
you can get better grades.
619
00:24:33,013 --> 00:24:37,184
And when you do more homework,
you can get better grades.
620
00:24:37,225 --> 00:24:40,479
Well, that's a pretty
convincing argument.
621
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:42,898
Okay, here are two donuts.
622
00:24:42,939 --> 00:24:44,816
One for you
623
00:24:44,858 --> 00:24:46,735
and one for your Cyrano.
624
00:24:49,112 --> 00:24:50,822
Well, we figured
625
00:24:50,864 --> 00:24:53,116
maybe if it worked
for girls
626
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:55,035
it'd work
for donuts, too.
627
00:24:55,076 --> 00:24:56,203
Want a bite?
628
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:14,012
Captioned by
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