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You are the most beautiful of flowers!

It's this one, like in that song!

Thank you.

My hat!

Good morning, professor.

Good morning. Good morning.

Before we begin our studies, I have some sad news to tell you.

Your fellow classmate Hector is no longer with us.

And do you know why?

The fool! Idiot! He got himself pinched!

They nabbed him in the subway for trying

to relieve a man of his wallet... and as ungracefully,

I say, as a hippopotamus.

I warned him. I told him.

Hector, I said, you haven't practiced enough.

Your fingers are too stiff!

The sap'll be lucky if he gets all but three months in the clink.

How many times do I have to remind you

that I will tolerate slang in my classroom?

Or the mention of prison, either.

Louis, draw the curtains. Lock the door.

This unfortunate incident proves that you're not

paying the proper attention to your studies.

Martin Number Two, go on. You too, hurry.

We start today with the inside coat pocket,

the one that cost poor Hector his freedom.

Thank you. All right, come on.

All right, Henri, you try it.

Me?

Yes, you, of course. Come on, hurry!

He isn't going to open his coat for you.

The right hand, the right hand.

The right hand brushes lightly.

Very flat. Come on, go to it!

Well, I can see where Hector is going to have company.

Look at these fingers. When you came here, they were long and graceful.

Now they're like sausages.

Trouble is I keep you too well. Silence!

Be seated.

Marie Annette, you come here.

Bravo, bravo!

Did you notice the dexterity of her fingers, the graceful touch?

If you were all as serious as Marie Annette,

if you applied yourselves and really worked hard...

Who is it? Professor, can you spare a moment?

Someone downstairs.

Continue.

Good day, sir. Monsieur?

Oh, I've come in answer to the ad you ran in the paper. "Jobs..."

"Jobs with a brilliant future for hardworking,

serious young people", huh?

That's it.

I wish I could have a chance at it, but I have no money for fees.

I take care of expenses while you're learning.

In exceptional cases, my students are even housed and fed.

Oh, it sounds good!

What's your trade?

Unemployed, but I used to be a mechanic.

Identification papers?

Oh, I need papers?

Oh, what do you think?

Of course, uh... they... but I must have left it at home.

Home? Where is your home?

Well, it's... uh, you know... You have no home.

I'm afraid you are right.

No home, no papers... I'm sorry, but under the circumstances...

Please, sir, won't you change your mind?

It's no use. No home, no papers... impossible. Good day.

But I will do anything. I will...

Good. Good, I was afraid you'd gone.

My man, I have reconsidered.

Oh, you have? Yes. By the way, what's your name?

Yves Cadubert.

Yves Cadubert.

Well, my dear Yves Cadubert, you may call me Professor.

And now, my dear Yves... but first give me back my 50 francs.

Oh... what 50 francs?

Listen, a short while ago, there was a 50 franc note here

on this desk, and now it's in your pocket.

But I swear... Good!

Good. Very good. And the expression!

The indignation is perfect.

It would fool anybody... but not me, nor the police.

Do you know what they'd do with a little bit nobody like you,

without identification papers if a respectable gentleman like me

reported that you'd stolen his 50 francs?

Professor, don't turn me in, please.

It's the first time I ever stole anything.

Excellent, simply excellent. You certainly show possibilities.

But no more nonsense. Now give me back my 50 francs.

Come on, come on.

Enough. Come on.

It's only by constant practice that members of our profession

can develop their sense of touch to the skill needed

to make a decent livelihood.

Nimble fingers are the first essential.

Without them... remember Hector.

All right, let's get to work on today's lesson.

Hurry, hurry! Take your places.

Come on. That's right.

He's eating too much. He's getting heavy.

Oh, Mimi, you look so beautiful. You're wonderful!

You look adorable this morning.

Come on, come on. Take your places. Hurry, now.

Get out of there. Get out of there. Keep moving, come on.

Everybody working. Over there. Come on, you.

Go on. Let's get going.

Bravo!

Quick and casual, that's the style. Bertrand, excellent!

Professor.

There's someone downstairs.

Good day, Monsieur. I, uh...

I came in answer to this.

Splendid. Sit down, would you?

Um, "Job with a future..."

Yes, yes, I know. I... I wrote it.

You're of age?

Oh, do I have to be?

Of course. You have to be 21.

Well, I'm 21.

Naturally, you have identification papers.

I didn't know I had to have papers.

Of course.

Um... Where do you live?

Well, I, um I did Oh.

Too bad. Too bad.

I'm afraid I shall have to, uh excuse me.

I'll be back in a moment.

But, uh, don't be too hopeful.

No home, no papers.

Well, my dear, I think we shall get along famously.

Really? You think so, Monsieur?

Yes. What's your name?

Arlette. Arlette Lafon.

Arlette Lafon. Well, my dear Arlette, I uh, first of all,

give me back my 50 francs.

50 francs?

Yes, my 50 francs.

What are you hiding?

I'm sorry, Monsieur, but I was so hungry, and

but you will give me the job, won't you, please?

I thought I could, but you disappointed me.

But I'm a good worker. Please give me the job.

I was so hungry, and I-

Yes, I'm just as sorry as you are not to be able to use you.

You're frank and honest. I like that. But it's not enough.

- Good day, Monsieur. - Oh wait a minute.

What's this?

Oh, that's that's just a handkerchief.

Yes, a handkerchief.

Right out of reform school. I know the kind very well.

When did you escape?

So, eh, you're number 497, eh?

Yes, Monsieur. I lied to you. I'm only 18.

When my parents died, I went to live with my aunt,

and she was mean to me. She beat me.

Then she got married and there were two to beat me.

That's why I ran away.

They had me put in that reform school

and it was just like a prison.

That's why I ran away from there, too.

Oh, please, Monsieur, don't turn me in. I'm not a bad girl.

You couldn't be, with those eyes and that expression.

Let's see your hands.

With these hands and what I can teach you,

there's no limit to your possibilities. Come along.

All right, now that you've been caught in the act,

what would you do?

Come on, what would you do?

Put it away.

Arlette, my dear, what would you do?

Uh, ask forgiveness and swear never to do it again.

No, no.

Play innocent. Deny everything.

Play innocent and deny everything.

That's right, that's right.

Of course, you must deny everything.

And you must deny it not only fervently but convincingly.

But don't rely on your voice alone.

Complete innocence must be written all over your face.

And to achieve this effectively,

we'll once more run through those exercises which

are somewhat similar to those used by professional actors.

We'll start with you.

Me, sir? You're mistaken, sir. It's not me.

I swear it on the head of my father.

Zero.

Henri, we'll try you.

But, uh, with a little hint of emotion, please.

Yes, sir.

Me, sir! You're mistaken, sir! It's not me. It's not me.

I swear it! I swear it!

I swear it on the head of my father, I didn't do it!

I don't blame you for laughing.

I ask you to emote and you bellow like a sick calf.

Yves, you try. With a little bit less emotion.

Me, sir? You're mistaken, sir. It's not me.

I swear it on... on, on the head of my father.

You swear it on the head of your father

just as if you were openly confessing your guilt.

But it gives me the jitters to swear that.

Oh, why?

Because my old man is still alive.

He's in the poorhouse, but he's still alive.

So your old man's still alive. That's too bad.

What do you want me to do about it? Wait?

Arlette, my dear, you try.

Me, sir? Oh, you're mistaken, sir. I didn't do it.

I swear on the head of my father.

That's it, that's it. That's convincing.

Come around here, my dear. That's right, show them.

Here we are. That's right. Now innocence.

Astonishment.

Anger.

Fear.

Pleading.

Bravo, Arlette! Bravo, bravo.

That's your homework for tonight.

You'll each practice that exercise diligently

in front of a mirror until you can do it as Arlette does.

Dinner in a short while.

Lights out as usual at nine o'clock. Class dismissed.

Me, sir?

You are mistaken, sir.

It's not me.

It's not me.

I- I swear it.

Ooh, that's no good.

Once more.

Oh- Me, sir?

You are mistaken, sir.

It's not me.

It's not me.

I swear it on the head of my father.

I'm innocent.

I'm innocent!

- Oh, shut up! - Oh.

Can't we get a little sleep around here?

Ah, shut up yourself.

Who is there?

It's me.

Oh, am I keeping you awake, too?

No, it isn't that.

That's good.

It's no use.

When I lie, everybody knows it.

Maybe I ought to go into politics, where it doesn't matter.

Tell me, how do you do it?

I make-believe, like an actress in a play.

But the thought of stealing I'll never be able to do it.

Well, why are you here in this place for?

And where would you go?

Back to the reform school?

You can't get a job without identification papers.

You know that.

Say, have you ever thought of marriage?

- Why, naturally, - That's it!

Marriage! A white marriage.

What?

A white marriage. Just the ceremony.

You'll never see the groom again, just at the marriage.

Now, listen.

Once you are married, your husband is responsible.

They can't put you back in the reform school.

You'd beat the rap.

Oh!

Well, who would I marry?

That's something I wouldn't know.

You see?

I'd be glad to help you, but I haven't got any papers, either.

But I know a guy who arranges marriages like that.

Well, come on, what are we waiting.

Hey, not so fast. Costs money.

- How much? - 3,000 francs.

Three thou-

Well, where would I get money like that?

That's what you're here for, to learn how.

To steal.

Steal to stay honest?

For that, I'll do it.

Taxi, taxi!

Taxi, taxi!

Taxi! Taxi. Taxi!

Taxi, taxi!

The circumstances which caused the downfall.

So, Your Honor, in honoring your decision

I beg of you to be lenient.

I have listened attentively

to the testimony of both sides and, after weighing

the evidence carefully, I am ready to render my decision.

Whether this is the first time you

have stolen or not is besides the point.

The undisputed fact is that you have stolen.

The law does not say that when you

put your hand in your neighbor's pocket to take his property,

he must apologize to you because you have never done it before.

Nor does it say there is no guilt because you have

what seemed an important reason for stealing his property.

After all, he may have just an important a reason

for keeping his property.

Yes, Your Honor.

I agree.

And there is no excuse for my client's indiscretion,

regardless of the explanation of his desperate circumstances.

But I assure you that now he realizes

the seriousness of his offense.

And if leniency is shown him

by the court, he will not make another mistake.

The stolen article has been returned to the owner

and the prisoner has been instructed.

And if Your Honor will be merciful,

the prisoner will not forget his duty to society again.

I- I swear I'll never steal again.

It was the very first time, Your Honor.

I promise it won't happen again.

I hope you are right.

For the next three months, I am going

to make sure that you do not do any more stealing.

Where you are going, there will be little temptation to steal.

- But Your Honor- - Take the prisoner away.

But but Your Honor, please!

Please, Your Honor, please.

Next case.

But Monsieur, if we go now, we'll miss the "Mickey Mouse."

Don't you like the "Mickey Mouse"?

Monsieur, what good will it do to turn me in to the police?

This is not the police station.

Monsieur, I assure you, you're making a great mistake.

Yes, Your Excellency.

Monsieur, Captain, General, Your Excellency,

Your Highness!

Let me go, let me go!

But I've got to! It's important. I've got a date!

All right, you can keep me here by force if you want

to, but I warn you, I'll I'll do something desperate.

I'll- I'll complain to the man with the stickpin!

What I want to know is how long you're going to keep me here.

Well, say something!

Oh, it isn't your conversation bores me.

It's just that I'm beginning to lose my patience.

If you don't let me out of here,

I'll- I'll scream! I'll- I'll count to three.

One.

Two.

Two and a half.

Look out.

Three.

Oh!

Oohh!

Ah, Baron Dvorak.

Here at last.

What detained you?

I was with a with the Secretary of the Interior, Your Excellency,

when I received your message.

Mmhm.

Likely story.

But really, Dvorak, not that I mind.

You must think of your family particularly of your niece.

My niece? But I have no niece.

Of course you have.

Theresa, my sister, is a young woman

of irreproachable character. I assure you-

Well, now, don't get excited, Dvorak.

Perhaps I should have broken it to you more gently.

But Theresa oh, no, no, no.

Besides, she's homely.

But your niece isn't. Look.

Now, let's go over it once again, and this time, get it right.

I come from Geneva.

I went to- I attend a girls' boarding house-

Boarding school.

Boarding school.

I go back to Geneva tomorrow. This is my first trip to Paris.

This is my first ball. This is the first time my feet hurt, too.

- And you are? - I'm worn out.

Answer. Who are you?

I am Mademoiselle Arlette de Chevrolet.

De Chevier!

De Chevier. Pardonnez-moi. Arlette de Chevier.

You are my uncle and I am your niece.

Baron I mean, Uncle who am I gonna tell all these lies to?

His Excellency has some company in here.

Now remember, you are not to utter one word

that I haven't taught you.

Don't forget, you're supposed to be a lady.

Ah, Dvorak.

- Oh, Your Excellency. - How are you, Baron?

Oh, fine, fine, Your Excellency.

And I hope you're fine too, sir.

I'm very well indeed, thank you very much.

Oh, I'm glad to hear it, sir.

Uh, oh, this is Mademoiselle de Chevier.

Er, my niece.

Oh, delighted.

And why haven't I met this young lady before?

Oh, this is my first trip to Paris,

and this is my first ball, and I'm going back to Geneva tomorrow.

My dear, a schoolgirl's career

is hardly a subject of interest to His Excellency.

Oh, but I am most interested.

We'll talk about this later on in the evening, hm?

Thank you, Your Excellency. With your permissions.

My dear, excuse me, I must have a word with Dvorak.

- Mademoiselle. - Yes, Uncle?

Oh, Your Excellency. How do I look?

Charming.

I feel charming, too.

You know, this is just like a dream I once-

I didn't bring you here to talk about your dreams.

I, uh, want you to dance with someone.

Oh? Who?

That man over there.

The one dancing with the lady in black.

- Oh, him? - Don't point.

Oh, he looks very nice.

And the lady's beautiful.

Aye.

Well, when do I dance with him?

I have to introduce you first.

Oh. Do I ask him right away?

He will ask you.

But suppose he doesn't.

He will.

And while you're dancing with him,

you will discreetly relieve him of his watch.

But that's stealing!

It's a secret mission.

I won't do it.

I must have that watch.

Well, then swipe it yourself.

I've only stolen once, and I'm not going to steal again.

Then you'll go to jail for stealing my stickpin.

What?

You mean, if I don't steal the second time,

I go to jail for stealing the first time?

Exactly.

And you an ambassador.

You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

- Mademoiselle. - Monsieur.

My dear, Mademoiselle Arlette de Chevier.

This is my wife.

Mademoiselle.

Uh, Baron Dvorak's niece.

Monsieur Pierre de Roche, a young diplomat

with a very promising future.

How do you do, Mademoiselle?

Monsieur.

Monsieur is as smooth a dancer as he is a diplomat.

Oh, don't believe a word of it, Mademoiselle.

This is her first ball. You are to be her first partner.

May I?

My dear, shall we dance?

I sense he is placing a great responsibility upon me.

I'm afraid I'm unworthy of it.

A young girl's first ball is a very important event.

She'll remember it all her life.

So I shall be part of your memory.

And believe me, I'm very proud and flattered.

I didn't know Dvorak had such a charming niece.

Well, he didn't know it himself. - What?

I mean that he's so absent-minded

that that he never thought to mention her.

- What time is it? - Am I boring you?

Oh, no, it's just that, uh, I must join my uncle at 10 o'clock sharp.

Ah.

Is it 10 o'clock?

Is it 10 o'clock?

You have lots of time.

But, uh, is it 10:00?

Oh, it's only five past 10:00.

Plenty of time yet.

- Uh. - Oh.

But if I let you go to your uncle, will you come back quickly?

Oh, I promise.

I'll be waiting for you in the buffet.

Have I finished that caviar sandwich already?

- Yes, Monsieur. - Mm, funny.

My dear Pierre, it's you. What luck.

- For whom? - For both of us.

I have the supreme pleasure of seeing you.

You have the supreme pleasure of seeing me.

But your pleasure's even more supreme than mine,

because you are about to have the honor of doing me a little favor.

Ah.

Waiter, some champagne, please.

Champagne? Aren't you eating?

Oh, I forgot. You've dined, haven't you?

Haven't you?

Suppose I told you I hadn't even lunched.

I wouldn't believe you.

And I think I know what favor you are going to ask me.

My dear Pierre, you're as good as gold.

Mm.

- Do you have it? - Oh! No.

No, but I saw it. It's not worth a thing.

You'll not even get 50 francs for it. Believe me, I know.

Will you kindly do as I told you?

- But I can get you much better. - No.

- But I- it's got diamonds. - No.

Don't you worry about what it's worth.

That's the one I want. Now do as I tell you.

All right.

All right.

But you got mighty funny taste.

Oh, you look happy.

- I am. - Something special?

It's very special.

I couldn't find my uncle, so I hurried back.

- Very special. - I see what you mean.

Oh, Mademoiselle Chevier, let me introduce to you

my worthless friend, Roland Latour.

Enchanted to meet you, Mademoiselle.

You should be. Shall we dance?

Yes, I'll wait right here. I'm counting on you.

Mm, what's this?

Did you see that?

She got his watch.

What?

You know, usually at this time

I get the most irresistible desire to leave.

I stop hearing the music.

I stop listening to the conversation.

All I seem to hear is the ticking

of my watch telling me it's time to go home.

And tonight?

Tonight I don't even hear my watch.

Oh, there's my uncle now!

But- but pardon me.

This time you got it?

Are you satisfied?

My dear, you did me a very great favor.

Is it that important?

Well, you wouldn't understand, naturally.

It concerns a grave matter.

Well, now, Your Excellency, we're even.

Not quite. I still need your services.

Another one?

No. It's just a question of returning this one to its owner.

What'll I tell him, that I picked it up off the floor?

Not at all. You're going to put it back in his pocket

as discreetly as you took it out.

- What? - Put it back in his pocket.

Put it back in his pocket?

That should be easy, even for a beginner.

But they never taught us that.

I wasn't gone very long this time, was I?

Even longer than before.

I was getting older by the minute.

I kept wanting to look at my watch.

You must have been away at least...

that's funny, my watch is gone.

Are you sure you had it?

Well, I think so.

Yes! Don't you remember?

I showed it two you when it was five past 10:00.

Oh, that's right.

Well, uh, maybe it's in another pocket?

Oh, no. Oh, no, I never-

That's strange. I never put it in that pocket.

Well, my dear.

Where have you been all evening?

You keep appearing and disappearing like a magician's rabbit.

Well, you know what an embassy ball is for an ambassador.

I know what a bore it is for an ambassador's wife.

I'm feeling neglected.

Well, I'm sorry.

But now that I'm free of a great burden,

I'm completely at your disposal. Would you dance?

I wish to speak to you.

Dvorak, you are not going to take your niece away.

Just for a few minutes.

Hurry back.

Mademoiselle, your mission is fulfilled.

His Excellency has asked me to tell you

how completely satisfied he is with your work and to give you this.

Naturally, you will keep all the clothes, everything.

And now, Mademoiselle, good night.

You mean you're kicking me out?

Oh, not at all.

Only that your presence here is no longer desirable.

Oh, I almost forgot His Excellency

asked me to remind you that he's counting

on your discretion, which will ensure you his own.

But Baron, can't I go back for just a moment?

- No, that is impossible. - But I'd like to-

I'll tell Monsieur de Roche that my niece wasn't feeling

well and that she has asked me to say good night for her.

Mademoiselle, you're forgetting something.

You are forgetting something else, Mademoiselle.

Me!

Oh, I'm sorry, but my uncle, uh, said it was time for me to go home

and that he'd make my excuses.

But it's so early.

I know, but well, he thought my first ball,

and I shouldn't stay too late, you know?

Believe me that your uncle is a prude.

- Come on, just one more. - No, but I must go.

- Believe me. - I'll explain to him.

All right, all right, then I'll take you home.

- But I- I can't. - Why?

You don't think I'd let you go home alone, do you?

But I'll be all right. I mean-

You certainly will be, because I'm going with you.

Oh, Pierre, Pierre!

Oh, I just made it.

You were leaving without seeing me.

Oh, stop whining.

I'm not asking for alms, old man.

After all, I keep a record of what I owe you.

All right, add this to the account.

- Oh, but, uh- - That's all I have on me.

Beautiful, thanks. Uh, I'll be at your house in the morning.

I simply must tell my troubles to somebody.

Oh, no, no, no, not to me again.

Pierre, if you don't help me, I shall be thrown out in the street.

Not another sou.

Very well, then. I shall have to sleep on a park bench.

But don't let that bother you.

- Did you call, my friend? - Yes.

I can't bear to think of you sleeping on a park bench.

The are not wide enough.

Look, I'm leaving tomorrow night for a week or so.

Idiot. Diplomatic mission.

You may use my house until I come back.

You are a pal.

Well, uh, thank you very much, and and good night.

Why are you in such a hurry?

We are not at your uncle's yet.

Oh.

Oh, that's right.

I always get mixed up.

Well, um, why did you stop here?

Because I don't want to be interrupted again

by your uncle coming back.

I have something to say to you.

Have you?

Yes.

It's nothing.

There.

Is that better?

I wish I could say what I feel.

But with you, somehow it's difficult.

You are crying.

I'm sorry.

Do you always cry with a kiss?

I don't know.

This is the first time.

That you have cried?

That I've been kissed.

First ball, first dance partner, first kiss?

It's too good to be true.

But it is.

But then why are you crying?

I always cry when I'm happy.

And have you cried often?

This is the first time.

This is an occasion.

- Oh, good evening, sir. - Good evening, my friend.

Lovely night.

Never fall in love, Laurent. Good night.

Good night, sir.

You know him?

Oh, yes.

And he let you swipe flowers out of that garden?

Naturally! It's my garden.

Oh!

That's your house.

Yes.

Beautiful.

You- you live there alone?

Yes, all alone. That is, with Flora.

Flora?

Hm? Yes, that's her name. Flora.

She's very cute. And smart, too.

One of the smartest dogs you ever saw.

Oh, a dog.

What did you think?

Oh, nothing.

Well, don't think it.

And tell me, how did you learn to whistle like that?

Oh, it's very simple.

You just you just put your tongue against your lower teeth, eh?

Like that.

And then you put your two fingers, see, under your tongue like that.

- Mmhm. - And you blow, OK?

You just go.

Amazing.

You put your two fingers like-

Yeah, put your tongue against your lower-

And then something like that.

- And then you blow. - And then you blow.

No, blow again.

Harder.

It doesn't work.

Oh, thank you very much, and good night.

Not yet!

When am I going to see you again?

Oh, uh, I don't know.

I- I'm going back to Geneva tomorrow.

To Geneva?

Yes, I- I go to school there.

I can't believe it!

That's marvelous!

I'm leaving for Geneva tomorrow, too.

We can travel together.

You are taking the night express, of course?

- Well, uh. - The 6 o'clock, then?

That one is no good. It's always late.

Well, that's the one I'm taking.

It doesn't matter. I'll take you.

It would be a delightful trip.

So I'll meet you at the station.

Oh.

You-

You, you wouldn't care to let me make you cry again?

No.

Until tomorrow, then.

Don't forget.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Who's there?

Oh, why on Earth are you coming home at this hour?

You know the rules, in by midnight.

I saw a gentleman. A very elegant gentleman.

And I followed him.

He oh, he had a magnificent pearl stickpin.

Oh, that's different. Pearl stickpin, eh?

Uh-huh. I followed him and followed him

until he got on the bus, and then I-

Never mind the details. Where's the pin?

I didn't get it.

- Why not? - I got scared.

You're lying.

Oh, no! I swear it on the head of my father.

No, no, no. Not to me.

No, not to me.

And remember, young lady,

I'm not running a charitable institution here.

Go on, get to bed.

Ah, good morning, gent- mm.

I hope nothing went wrong at the embassy ball.

Well, hope again.

You mean you didn't have much, uh, success?

Nothing.

Gentlemen, it cost me 10,000 francs to get you into that ball.

I'm not in the habit of wasting 10,000 francs.

I work too hard for my money. I demand an explanation.

We demand one, too.

Now there must have been a king's ransom in jewels

at that ball last night, and you say that you didn't get anything?

Don't tell me.

We don't operate unless we have an exclusive.

We don't engage in a free-for-all

where somebody slips up and we might get nabbed.

I tell you, there was nobody.

What are you looking at?

And you said you didn't know who was there.

Then would you please explain how one of your pupils

could get into the embassy ball, unless you had made the arrangement?

Yes, that's the one.

The one in the checker blouse.

That's the girl.

Ah.

Bring me model number seven.

Today we are going to take up some

of the problems in the social world.

Arlette, my dear, come here.

A most opportune moment to achieve our purpose

is while dancing.

Come on, pretend you're dancing.

First ball, first dance partner, first kiss.

You wouldn't care to let me make you cry again?

I'll meet you at the station.

Don't forget.

Permit me to introduce Monsieur Pierre de Roche,

attache at the embassy.

I might have known it.

A face as honest as yours could only be dishonest.

Could only lie.

But not to me, do you hear?

Get out of here, you thief!

Get out, you double-crosser! Get out.

Give her a chance to explain.

If you don't want to be kicked out took I advise you to shut up!

Hand over the watch you stole.

- But I didn't steal it. - My men saw you.

Well, didn't they see me put it back?

No, they didn't. So you put it back, eh?

- My word of honor. - Your word.

You just said that you didn't steal it.

How could you put it back if you didn't steal it?

- I took it, but I put it back. - Liar!

Ingrate. Without me, you wouldn't know how to steal.

Now that you do, you want to keep it all.

Get out of here, you crook!

- Get out and stay out! - That's just what I will do.

I'd rather be back in reform school than here at your filthy old school.

We come here for honest jobs, and you-

You make thieves out of us.

They'll catch up with you one of these days.

And you'll see, you see. And I hope it's soon!

You stay there.

Pillow, blankets, sandwiches, fresh fruit.

Pillows, blankets, sandwiches, fresh fruit.

Pillows, blankets, sandwiches, fresh fruit.

Pillows, blankets, sandwiches, fresh fruit.

Oh, here you are! At last.

I was beginning to get worried. How are you? Where is your porter?

- I haven't any. - Where is you baggage?

- I haven't any. - Oh!

You mean you mean to travel without baggage?

No, no, I'm I'm not leaving.

I just came down to say goodbye and and to explain-

Goodbye? You are joking, of course.

No, no, I'm not. Honest, I'm not.

But that's absurd, when only last night

I know. A lot of things have happened since last night-

Then when are you leaving?

I'm not leaving at all.

- At all? - No.

You see? Flora is disappointed, too.

Then may I see you when I get back?

No, I'm sorry.

You don't want to see me again?

Yes yes, I do, very much.

But, uh- but I won't be able to see you for a a long, long time.

A long, long time? Are they going to lock you up?

- Yes, they are. - Who, your uncle?

- My uncle? - What are you trying to say?

I'm trying to tell you that I, uh,

that I ran away from a reform school.

Reform school?

You don't expect me to believe that.

Yes, I do.

Did the ambassador tell you why he wanted my watch?

No. He just said it was very important that I get it for him.

You did a terrible thing.

- I'm sorry, I- - I must phone.

But wait, your train'll be leaving!

Wait for me. Wait for me right there.

All aboard!

Just a minute! Wait a minute!

But if your husband saw my watch,

he saw your picture in the back, don't you see?

What do you mean I shouldn't worry?

Of course I do, but this is no time-

What?

Train is leaving!

What?

They found nothing in the compartment?

But that's not possible.

My papers were there, my briefcase, my baggage.

Did they jump out of the window?

And my dog, Flora.

If anything happened to Flora, I-

It's your job to find them! That's all!

I brought your things back.

Thanks! Thanks.

I- I'll be right down.

I- I had to ride all the way to the next station,

and it was a long walk back.

You shouldn't have done that.

Well, I didn't want you to lose your dog and your luggage on my account.

Sorry I can't open the door.

My man thought I'd gone and he locked up everything.

I had to climb through a window to get in myself.

- Here's your umbrella. - Thanks.

And here's your Flora.

Well, hello, little girl. What an adventure, huh?

Well, good night.

Where are you going?

Back to the reform school.

At this time of night?

Oh, that's all right. You can always get in.

Wait a minute.

What's the matter?

Are you homesick for that reform school?

Oh, that's not it.

It'll have to be done sooner or later.

What will they do to you?

First, they'll make me account for every minute I've been away.

Inquisitive, hm?

And what are you going to tell them?

The truth.

The tr- you aren't going to tell them about at the embassy ball?

I'll have to.

Well, suppose we talk this all out tomorrow morning?

Tomorrow morning? They won't let me have any visitors.

No, I mean you can stay here tonight.

Come on, you are dead tired.

Pierre, alone? With you?

I assure you I know how to behave with a young lady.

So I've noticed.

What's the matter?

That stupid servant didn't make up the bed.

Yes?

Um, do you, uh, mind if I wear this?

I certainly do.

Put it back at once.

It belongs to my sister.

If I could suggest something, um-

You have suggested enough.

Well, I was only going to suggest

that you sleep in the other room, and I could sleep here.

I've slept without sheets before.

Oh, so have I.

Here, let me help you make the bed.

No, I don't need your help, and I don't want your advice.

You were very kind, and I am duly grateful.

Danke schoen, merci beaucoup, good night.

Get the idea? Gute Nacht. Buonasera. Bonne nuit.

Well, what now?

Uh, I didn't want to leave the wrong impression with you,

so I'd like to finish telling you-

What of it now? I- I'm sleepy.

Look, I only stole once.

No, twice. No, once.

Well, anyway, I gave them both back.

So you gave it back so you only stole once.

I'll keep that in mind. And now, good night.

Good night.

You know why I stole?

No. And frankly, I don't-

It's because I wanted to get married.

You stole because you wanted to get married?

Yes, I wanted to buy a husband.

To buy what?

You know, like a marriage in name only.

- Can you guess why? - No.

And I am not going to guess. You'll tell me anyway.

Because if I was married,

I wouldn't have to go back to the reform school.

- What? - Yes, that's the law.

Once you're married, you're free.

Yves told me so.

And who is this Yves who knows so much about the law?

Oh, he's my friend. My only friend.

He could have gotten me a husband, only I'd have to pay for it.

That's why I stole.

Once I was married, I I could start a new life.

- A new life. - Now do you see?

Not very clearly.

Well, let me explain it to you.

- First- - Oh, no, not now.

It's really too late.

You can finish telling me about your life tomorrow morning.

And now, to bed. And sweet dreams.

And if I hear another word out of you tonight,

I won't answer for the consequences.

Buonasera. Buenas noches. Bonne nuit. Gute Nacht.

Well, if it isn't Monsieur Roland.

- Hello there, Jean. - Sir.

Hello. You still here?

No. I mean, uh, yes.

For the love of I completely forgot I offered you my house.

What?

Obviously I can't stay here.

Why, I've checked out of my hotel. It'll be a calamity.

Well, you see, it's like this.

I- that is, uh oh, we'll manage somehow.

Well, I- I have to pay the cab fare. - Well, go ahead.

Yeah, well, no, no, the fact is I, uh...

Oh. I get it.

Mmhm.

And, uh, bring me the change.

- Listen, old man. - Hm?

My affairs are in a terrible state.

I want to end it once and for all.

It might save us both a lot of bother.

Would you like my revolver?

Oh, not at all, no. I wouldn't end it that way.

Man like me doesn't give up the ship.

He he fights courageously.

And how much do you need to fight courageously?

Mm, about, uh, 10,000 francs?

Yes, for 10,000, I could settle everything.

I could go to the colonies and start a new life.

A new life? You, too?

What do you mean, me too?

Are you quite sure that with 10,000 francs, you-

Oh, positively, yes.

Of course with 15,000, I could start a really new life, first class.

I think I have a way for you to earn the 10,000.

- 15,000. - Ten.

Look, my old friend, a really first class new life-

Do you remember the girl I was dancing with at the embassy ball?

- Dvorak's niece. - Yes, that's the one.

Only she's not Dvorak's niece.

Oh, she's not his niece, huh?

She's going to get married.

Really? To you?

- No, to you. Yes, to you. - To me?

And believe me, you'll never find a nicer or more charming girl.

- Good morning. - Good morning.

Do you take coffee in the morning?

Yes. Er, that is, no. I mean, not this morning.

From what you said last night,

I gather everything would be fine if only you were married.

Yes.

Everything.

I've given it a lot of thought.

After all, you did me a favor, and I'm returning it.

Oh, you don't have to.

Naturally, my friend Roland would only

marry you under certain conditions.

Roland?

Yes. Yes, Roland.

Now the marriage would be perfectly legal.

Although it wouldn't tie either of you down.

Immediately after the ceremony,

you would each be free to go your own way.

I see.

You don't seem that enthusiastic.

Wasn't this what you wanted?

Don't you like the idea?

Yes, of course.

Well, then what's the matter with you all of a sudden?

Oh, nothing. Nothing at all.

What are you thinking about?

What happened after the ball, when you kissed me.

Please. Let's not talk about that.

I can understand Roland is nobody is to get excited about,

but this might work out very well.

He isn't a bad fellow, when you get to know him.

The marriage banns can be published

and the whole thing completed within a week.

And during that time, of course, you can stay here.

Then I accept.

Monsieur, the car is waiting to take you to the station.

I'm coming.

You're leaving?

Why, yes.

Where are you going?

To Geneva, of course.

Oh.

Come in.

Monsieur, they are waiting for you in the conference room.

Oh.

Tell them, tell them I'm sorry but I must go back to Paris immediately.

- Hello, Laurent. - What can I do for you, sir?

Who the- who are you?

- I'm the butler. - Whose butler?

- Monsieur's butler. - Monsieur who?

Monsieur Pierre de Roche.

Ah.

You are Monsieur Pierre de Roche's butler?

Yes, sir, that I am.

Is Monsieur Pierre de Roche at home?

No, sir. Monsieur Pierre de Roche is in Geneva.

And he probably won't be home until the end of the week.

What is it I hear?

Those, Monsieur, are two friends of the boss a gentleman and a lady.

Mmhm.

And, could I speak to these friends of your boss?

I'll see if they are in, sir.

Whom shall I announce, sir?

Monsieur Pierre de Roche. The boss.

Yes, sir.

Oh! I beg your pardon, boss!

Welcome home, sir.

Would you mind getting my bags in the taxi?

Of course, sir. Right away.

Come in, please, sir.

Oh.

Bravo, bravo.

My, what a pleasant surprise.

We hadn't expected you quite so soon.

Hope I'm not intruding.

Oh, how perfectly silly. Of course not.

Oh.

Won't you, er, sit down?

You are very kind.

Pierre! Pierre. Hello, good old Pierre.

How come you're back so soon?

Am I disturbing you, too?

Ah? Oh, not at all, not at all.

What a silly idea.

Glass of sherry?

- No, thanks. - Who would have thought it?

What conduct, what ease, what savoir-faire!

A real little woman of the world, eh?

You must have given her some lessons.

Oh, yes, I did, I did.

Mm, I thought as much.

- What do you mean? - Tell us about your trip.

What are they doing in Geneva?

Well, for one thing, they are not showing their legs

the way they are in Paris this year.

Thank you so much for telling me.

Oh, by the way, who is the new butler?

Oh, he's a schoolmate of mine.

A schoolmate?

From that girls' boarding school in Geneva, no doubt.

Has he any identification papers?

Oh, no, but I- I can answer for him.

He's so anxious to start a new life.

A new life? He, too?

Certainly looks as if my house has

turned into a home for reformed characters.

Oh, thanks, old man. Thanks a lot.

Well.

You are leaving?

Yes, I'm going to get dressed.

If you don't mind.

You know, like they do in Geneva?

Ah, she's enchanting.

Mind you, that girl has brains as well as beauty.

Let me show you some of the snapshots I took of her with your camera.

Not bad for an amateur, eh?

Oh, very well, it's your loss. Hm.

Well, in that case, we're better get down to serious business.

Not money, by any chance?

Yes. This time, not for me.

You realize, of course, I had to buy

her something decent to wear.

- A bathing suit? - Sun suit.

Naturally one or two other little things.

You don't expect a man like me to marry a woman in rags.

Eh, here are the bills.

Frankly, I don't get it.

Was it really necessary to buy all this

for a girl you'll see for five minutes

at the marriage ceremony?

The fact is, I'm beginning to wonder if our marriage really

will be one in name only.

You know, I firmly believe

that the root of all my past troubles has been sheer loneliness.

If I could feel someone by my side, always ready to advise,

to sympathize, to feel the tender

touch of a feminine hand.

You you are joking, of course.

Oh, not at all, no.

Arlette and I get on like a house afire.

And do you see the way she snaps up

any little hints I happen to drop?

Surely you've noticed the change in her deportment.

Huh, not to mention her grammar.

Now look, Roland.

Just because a girl catches on quickly,

and has beautiful legs,

that's not enough to build the pyramid of marriage on.

Do you mean to say that charm and grace and femininity aren't important?

Yes, they are.

But what do you know about her?

Her family, uh.

Oh, we'll go to the colonies, where anybody who plays bridge

is accepted.

I'll teach her the "strong no trumps".

And what will you live on?

Your money, first.

You won't go very far.

Tahiti?

We could live on seafood, coconuts, bananas.

Ah, those South Seas are simply enchanting.

Canoes, gardens of flowers, lovely native songs.

And at night, bridge.

Who's in there?

Oh, uh, someone or other.

Male or female?

Why should you care?

Look, Yves, you're not playing fair with me.

Don't be a fool.

I just don't want you to get mixed up in something

that's none of your business.

Listen, are we pals? Yes or no?

Of course we are. You know that.

But I'm also the sort of servant you approve of.

Discreet.

Look for yourself.

Are you afraid, Pierre?

Of course I'm not afraid.

But it's not exactly comfortable when your husband

knows I had your picture in my watch.

But he doesn't know.

When he's jealous, he's terrible,

and he has never been sweeter or more considerate

than he is right now.

Shh! Not so loud, I beg of you.

Is there someone else in the house?

Hm?

No.

But the servants might hear.

Or your secretary?

What will you think of next?

She only comes on Wednesday.

Mm. Pretty.

Hideous.

Fake glasses and pigeon-toed.

What do you think of this one for the wedding tomorrow?

Oh, I beg your pardon!

My, what a pleasant surprise.

And how is His Excellency?

Very well, I hope.

Fine.

And how is your uncle?

Fine, fine.

I'm afraid I've neglected him a little of late.

And now if you'll excuse me, the dressmaker's waiting.

Dress fittings, you know, it's such a deadly bore.

See you soon, I hope.

- Let me explain to you- - Oh, it's quite clear.

I understand perfectly.

No. No, it isn't clear at all.

- You are completely mistaken. - Oh, stop lying.

And give me back my picture.

Now I understand why you invented

that silly story which didn't make sense.

This girl means nothing to me.

You'll soon be convinced.

Of course not.

You're just buying her pretty clothes

because you are sorry for her.

Pierre, I want my picture back.

I already told you, your husband took it.

Look for yourself!

You can be irritating beyond words.

What do you want?

Haven't I got enough trouble?

Females. Females!

Always under your feet or in your hair.

Nothing but trouble.

I've got half a mind to trade you in for a male dog.

Get away.

Get away, go on.

Go on!

Poor old funny-face.

I know I take it out on you, but I don't really mean it.

What shall I do about it?

Pierre, where are you? Oh, there you are.

Listen, old man, I've come up to the courthouse.

Everything is in order. The banns are published.

I must say it gave my quite a kick to see my name right

alongside Arlette's.

Oh, by the way, that reminds me.

You owe me 300 francs to cover the cost of the license.

Now here's the itemized account.

Let's not be hasty.

Oh, no, this only played once.

You see, these papers are essential

to the marriage and the big day's tomorrow, don't forget.

There is not going to be any marriage.

No, there's not- What are you talking about?

I refuse to be a party to this farce.

That's rather a sudden switch, isn't it?

Sudden?

For the last two nights I haven't slept a wink.

Why?

Because.

Because she's on my mind constantly.

It's on account of her I rushed back from Geneva.

When she's around, I'm seized with a terrible desire

to take her in my arms.

And all I do is to be rude and unkind to her.

The whole thing is insane.

But I can't fight against it any longer.

You're right, Roland.

Career, social position,

what do they matter compared to love?

Who's talking now?

Come on, old man, pull yourself together.

It's quite different with me.

I can marry Arlette because I blotted myself

from copybook ages ago.

You'd be amazed the number of houses I'm not invited to.

But you, you have a brilliant future, a real career.

For you to marry Arlette is out of the question, definitely out.

As for anything else, well, believe me, Pierre,

this is her one chance to lead an honest life.

Don't take it away from her.

And don't make a fool of yourself, either.

Look at me.

It's through a series of just such brainstorms

that I landed where I am now. With a ticket to Tahiti.

One, mark you. She didn't want to come.

I asked her. She turned me down.

It's up to you, Pierre.

Let her go.

All right.

All right, all right, go and marry her.

But do it quickly, as quickly as possible.

Article 212.

Husband and wife owe one another mutual fidelity,

mutual sympathy and mutual assistance.

Article 213.

The husband, as head of the family,

has the right to designate the place of mutual residence.

The wife is obligated to live there with him,

and her husband, in turn, to receive her.

Will the bride and groom please rise?

Monsieur Roland Latour, do you take for your wife

Mademoiselle Arlette Lafon, present here?

Yes, Your Honor. Yes, I do.

Mademoiselle Arlette Lafon, do you take as your husband

Monsieur Roland Latour, present here?

Excuse me, would you please read article 213 again?

The husband, head of the family,

has the right to designate the place of mutual residence.

The wife is obligated to live with him there,

and the husband, in turn, to receive her.

Oh.

You mustn't say, "oh." Say, "yes".

I know.

Mademoiselle Arlette Lafon, do you take as your husband

Monsieur Roland Latour, present here?

Uh, no.

Excuse us, Your Honor.

My fiancee's a little upset.

We'll, uh, we'll be back another day.

I hope.

Just a moment, Madam.

Oh, pardon me, Mademoiselle.

I congratulate you.

For 30 years now, I have had a monotonous job.

I've been marrying couple after couple,

asked them all the same questions,

and they all give me the same answers.

And just when I felt bored to death,

you come along and have the courage to say no!

Bravo, Mademoiselle!

Believe me, it is much better for a marriage

not to come at all than for it to end in divorce.

Bravo!

Thank you.

Thank you very much, Your Honor.

Why are you dressed like that?

If you should ever think of me,

I want you to think of me like this.

I will.

That first dance meant so much to me.

Pierre, one last dance?

I'm already late.

It will be a memory to put away with the first one.

Please?

I think it would be better not to.

But you don't know how much it would mean to me.

I'd rather not.

Just one last dance?

Goodbye.

Well, I guess I'll get my things together.

Giving up, mm?

If I thought it was any use, I'd never give up.

- But as things are... - But as things are.

It's a good thing you gave up being a crook.

There was no future in it for you.

You haven't enough insight.

Enough observation.

Enough understanding of human nature.

Enough, uh, jenesaisquoi.

To be quite frank, you're not bright enough.

Look.

Why does a man pace back and forth like this for hours?

To exercise? No.

Another question.

Why does a man stand in front of a mirror like this, staring like this?

To admire himself?

To catch a glimpse of his necktie?

No.

Still another question.

Why does a man refuse to dance with a pretty girl?

Is it such a big thing?

No, it's nothing!

Unless... unless he's in love.

Then a dance is a big thing.

Then he has to fight it, because it can lead to...

Believe me, it can lead.

Well, all right, all right, then.

Why shouldn't it lead?

Why should he have to fight it?

If he loves me, why doesn't he just say so?

It would be so easy.

And so nice.

Because, my poor child, it's not true that a man in love

forgets everything.

75 percent, perhaps.

For certain emotional type like me, even 80!

But never everything.

And with what is left over, he thinks.

Now, the boss.

Perhaps he's thinking of

the 10 years he studied to be a diplomat.

Even to marry you, it's not so easy to toss

those 10 years out of the window.

Why should he have to toss them out of the window?

Listen.

For example.

He's on his way to the embassy reception.

Could he take you with him?

And why not?

Why should he be ashamed of me?

Oh, he should maybe be proud of you?

He should maybe present you to the ambassador like this.

Uh, you remember this little girl, Your Excellency?

She steals watches.

Yeah?

You mean I'm not good enough, maybe, hm?

That an ambassador who gets somebody to steal for him,

or his wife, who does love him,

or the baron who's an accomplice to a crime

just to keep his own bread buttered.

They think I'm not good enough to associate with them, huh?

Well, I'll just show Monsieur Pierre de Roche

that I can handle the whole mess of 'em, and make 'em like it!

Yves, are you sure?

You're very sure that Pierre loves me?

I swear it.

I swear it on the head of my father.

Lilacs?

Lilacs?

Lilacs?

Oh!

All of them.

Oh, thank you!

Thank you.

Arlette?

Where is she?

Oh, she... she's gone.

Gone?

Did she tell you where she was going?

No, sir.

But she asked where you were going.

Where did you tell her?

Yes, sir.

I told her you were going to the embassy reception.

Good.

- Sir? - Yes?

Shall I put those in water?

Oh.

Mm!

The underlying principle that must guide our negotiations

is that, in fact, the situation must

be handled with great delicacy.

Ooh!

- What? - No, uh, nothing.

- You said "ooh." - Who, me?

Yes, you. Why did you say "ooh"?

In the first place, I didn't say "ooh."

I said "oh."

My dear husband, I'm not deaf.

I heard you distinctly say "ooh."

My dear, I have no reason to say "ooh."

I simply said "oh."

Oh!

Pardon, Baron.

Your niece, Excellency.

Uncle?

- Hello, Uncle. - Hello.

Oh, Your Excellency.

This is a pleasure, Mademoiselle.

You didn't tell me your charming niece was coming.

Come and sit with me, my dear.

Mademoiselle Chevier, Baron Dvorak's niece.

He's introducing her as my niece!

Well, isn't she?

Naturally.

Now explain to me, my dear, why you disappeared

so early from the embassy ball the other night.

Oh, uh.

Well, uh, my uncle, the Baron,

seemed to think that since it was my first ball

I shouldn't stay too late.

Oh, he's an old fogey.

Even now he's beginning to get that

"you'd better go home early" look.

It isn't late, is it?

Of course not.

Besides, you've only just arrived.

My, what a lovely watch.

Yes.

Isn't that beautiful?

Watches are my weakness.

- Oh. Mine, too. - Really?

Mademoiselle, may I have the pleasure?

Oh?

My pleasure.

Seniority.

Thank you.

The trouble with seniority is

that it's always wasted on old men!

Darling, since you're so anxious to dance,

I'll accommodate you.

Monsieur.

Your Excellency.

Oh, good evening, Pierre.

Good evening, sir.

How are you tonight, sir?

I'm very well, thank you.

I'm glad.

Oh.

I have a state secret to tell you. My shoes pinch.

She's dancing with de Roche! I saw them.

She's captivated him.

This is terrible!

Do you realize our responsibility?

- Our responsibility? - Yes, ours.

Excellency, it was really you.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Don't be technical.

This could have serious complications.

Think of something.

Come on, think, think, think.

I am, Your Excellency, I am.

Well, come on.

You have many conquests.

The minister seems to find you irresistible.

Ridiculous, isn't it?

Mm, he is a man of excellent taste.

Spare me the sarcasm.

I meant it.

Then spare me your charm.

Arlette, I was very happy to find you here.

Did you come to the ball to quarrel with me?

You wanted to dance.

At least enjoy it.

Very generous of you.

Did you notice the ambassador and his wife?

How nicely they danced?

How she smiled at him?

I wonder how charmingly they would smile at me

if you hadn't taken that picture out of my watch.

So you finally figured it out.

Yes.

Thank you. Thank you very much.

I must say, it took you a long time.

Personally I don't think you have

much future in the diplomatic corps.

No?

You haven't enough insight, enough, uh,

understanding of human nature.

Enough jenesaisquoi.

I know you are right, completely right.

It worries me.

I need someone to help me.

Someone clever, with the jenesaisquoi that I lack.

Someone like a secretary?

No, not exactly.

Someone more like a wife.

I don't suppose...

I don't suppose you'd be interested.

Well, it doesn't sound like much of a future.

What, with getting you out of scrapes with women

and recovering all the luggage that you lose.

Being gracious to a lot of high-class crooks

like the ambassador.

In no time at all, you'll probably

have me stealing watches for you, too.

No, it...

It doesn't sound very appealing.

I don't even know why I would consider it.

No. Oh, no, I...

Well, why should I?

Because I was your first partner at your first ball.

Because a young girl's first ball is a very important event

which she should remember all her life.

Because I want no one else in your thoughts,

in your memories.

Because I love you.

We must find a solution.

A solution, that's it.

- You have one? - No.

Oh, of course not.

I have.

Turn your lie into a reality.

Adopt her.

Make her my niece?

Well, what do you want?

An ugly black scandal or a lovely young niece?

Oh...

Arlette, my darling, aren't you happy?

Yes, very happy.

Well, why aren't you crying?

But I am, darling.

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