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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:06,961 I'm going to show you the most terrifying thing in the world. 2 00:00:10,702 --> 00:00:11,783 Your baby. 3 00:00:14,697 --> 00:00:16,028 Are you afraid of baby? 4 00:00:16,102 --> 00:00:22,348 No. Baby's not to be afraid of, baby's to be loved and managed. 5 00:00:22,445 --> 00:00:25,688 Even if baby is a source of noise 6 00:00:25,777 --> 00:00:27,142 and chaos and dirt... 7 00:00:27,436 --> 00:00:28,562 Put that out! 8 00:00:28,801 --> 00:00:30,565 That's what these classes are for, 9 00:00:31,009 --> 00:00:35,571 to unleash your hero within. 10 00:00:35,706 --> 00:00:38,232 - Alice, mine's a little black baby. - So what makes a hero? 11 00:00:38,315 --> 00:00:40,363 Is it bravery, love, or is it rules? 12 00:00:40,443 --> 00:00:41,854 I'll give you the back story. 13 00:00:41,929 --> 00:00:43,055 You get around. 14 00:00:43,133 --> 00:00:44,623 Antonia's rule number one. 15 00:00:44,699 --> 00:00:47,623 Bad babying begins with bad parenting. 16 00:00:47,709 --> 00:00:50,758 I trust that you're all responsible, sensible people. 17 00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,809 Whoa! 18 00:00:57,103 --> 00:00:58,912 Oh! Dare, dare! 19 00:00:58,990 --> 00:01:00,196 Okay. 20 00:01:02,242 --> 00:01:04,244 Eat my creamy nips. 21 00:01:04,330 --> 00:01:05,741 Now, that's what I call a dare. 22 00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:07,624 A dare, give me that. 23 00:01:11,355 --> 00:01:12,959 Now, that's what I call a dare. 24 00:01:13,523 --> 00:01:15,207 Truth, truth, truth! 25 00:01:15,651 --> 00:01:17,380 Antonia's rule number two. 26 00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:20,106 Know your enemy. 27 00:01:20,669 --> 00:01:23,593 Spend some time with other peoples' children. 28 00:01:25,807 --> 00:01:29,607 Oh, my God, they're going to school and I'm still wasted. 29 00:01:29,701 --> 00:01:31,703 Oh... 30 00:01:32,471 --> 00:01:34,041 Antonia's rule number three. 31 00:01:34,198 --> 00:01:35,529 Fortify your castle. 32 00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:39,570 You need to create a safe, stable environment at home. 33 00:01:40,541 --> 00:01:42,270 - Morning, guys. - Mmm. 34 00:01:42,347 --> 00:01:46,511 This is Larry, Barry, Mohammed and Jesus. 35 00:01:47,927 --> 00:01:50,089 I know. Who'd have thought they'd get on so well? 36 00:01:51,139 --> 00:01:54,348 So, let's meet our heroes. 37 00:01:55,394 --> 00:01:56,680 Alice. Alice! 38 00:01:56,759 --> 00:01:58,841 Tiny, little penis. Hello. 39 00:01:59,610 --> 00:02:01,180 Um, I'm Alice... 40 00:02:01,256 --> 00:02:04,180 And this is Mitch and Richie, the dads. 41 00:02:04,267 --> 00:02:05,393 Hello, hello. 42 00:02:05,631 --> 00:02:08,316 Slightly unconventional, two dads. 43 00:02:08,763 --> 00:02:13,690 Because... We were laughing earlier, saying, um, it's sort of like, 44 00:02:13,821 --> 00:02:16,062 "Did you hear the one about the Englishman, 45 00:02:16,150 --> 00:02:17,675 "the Irishwoman and the Scotsman?" 46 00:02:17,755 --> 00:02:19,678 - Couple number two. - Couple number two, please. 47 00:02:28,215 --> 00:02:30,377 Insert your nipple into the pump. 48 00:02:30,463 --> 00:02:32,909 Initially, only drops of milk will appear. 49 00:02:32,992 --> 00:02:35,154 After you trigger your milk ejection reflex, 50 00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,720 you'll see if start to spray out of your nipple. 51 00:02:37,809 --> 00:02:40,289 Continue to pump, until the milk ceases to flow 52 00:02:40,379 --> 00:02:43,189 Get right in there, give it a good wipe. 53 00:02:43,309 --> 00:02:45,960 It's just peanut butter and sweet corn. Believe me, parents, 54 00:02:46,039 --> 00:02:48,440 the real deal will be far, far worse. 55 00:02:49,251 --> 00:02:50,298 Very good, Mitch. 56 00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:52,703 Rather bad, Alice. 57 00:02:55,514 --> 00:02:57,642 Oh, you've got a little bit of, um... 58 00:02:59,970 --> 00:03:01,051 Mmm. 59 00:03:01,214 --> 00:03:04,935 As every good general will tell you, strategy is the key. 60 00:03:05,108 --> 00:03:06,678 You need a good birthing plan. 61 00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:08,244 Why do you need a plan? 62 00:03:08,481 --> 00:03:10,324 - I thought you were just gonna push. - No. 63 00:03:10,448 --> 00:03:13,531 No, you need to do, like, a proper list for the hospital, 64 00:03:13,619 --> 00:03:16,225 to tell them what drugs you want and what you don't want 65 00:03:16,309 --> 00:03:17,720 and who you want to be there. 66 00:03:18,075 --> 00:03:19,440 And I need to do one. 67 00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:22,452 Oh, it's all right, princess, I've already put a draft together. 68 00:03:22,772 --> 00:03:25,423 - You've done me a birthing plan? - Yeah. 69 00:03:25,743 --> 00:03:26,824 Oh, that reminds me. 70 00:03:26,907 --> 00:03:29,228 On the big day, in your packed lunch, what will you want, 71 00:03:29,316 --> 00:03:30,442 white bread or brown? 72 00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:33,775 - Bye. - Bye. 73 00:03:33,852 --> 00:03:35,422 - See you. - Yeah, bye, Antonia. 74 00:03:38,268 --> 00:03:40,236 I'm scared, Richie. 75 00:03:40,316 --> 00:03:42,444 I got the books, I bought the DVDs, 76 00:03:42,524 --> 00:03:45,004 I even went to that crazy baby expo, 77 00:03:45,173 --> 00:03:47,744 where all the women had that look on their faces. 78 00:03:47,823 --> 00:03:49,154 See the way they looked at you, 79 00:03:49,228 --> 00:03:52,277 when you asked if the baby would come out with teeth, they were like, "Eh?" 80 00:03:52,359 --> 00:03:55,124 Yep. And that was a completely reasonable question. 81 00:03:55,210 --> 00:03:56,974 They're all clones, a smugness. 82 00:03:57,056 --> 00:03:58,945 I bet they don't even have individual names. 83 00:03:59,505 --> 00:04:00,586 Bye, Frank! 84 00:04:00,669 --> 00:04:02,956 Oh, I know what you mean, Carol, I was saying exactly the same thing 85 00:04:03,038 --> 00:04:05,609 to Simon over the tea break. Look, you take care. 86 00:04:05,688 --> 00:04:06,814 - Bye. - Bye. 87 00:04:06,892 --> 00:04:08,178 - Bye. - See you later. 88 00:04:08,257 --> 00:04:10,703 Oh, what a lovely group of people. 89 00:04:10,786 --> 00:04:12,151 Friends for life, there, I reckon. 90 00:04:12,271 --> 00:04:16,595 You know what, I really, really need to go out and get fucked. 91 00:04:16,687 --> 00:04:19,736 Yeah, but you can't because you've given up drinks and drugs. 92 00:04:21,184 --> 00:04:22,629 Oh, you mean fucked? 93 00:04:32,103 --> 00:04:34,709 Christ, I'm gonna be a dad. 94 00:04:35,154 --> 00:04:36,565 You can be my daddy. 95 00:04:40,293 --> 00:04:44,218 Please let the baby be straight. Please let the baby be straight! 96 00:04:49,326 --> 00:04:51,977 It's eight o'clock and this is your classic hits half hour. 97 00:04:56,110 --> 00:04:57,271 Oh. 98 00:05:10,081 --> 00:05:11,207 Damn. 99 00:05:12,329 --> 00:05:13,376 Morning, sunshine. 100 00:05:15,099 --> 00:05:16,385 Ah. 101 00:05:17,267 --> 00:05:19,156 Morning. 102 00:05:19,234 --> 00:05:20,679 - Eddie... - It's Dave. 103 00:05:20,759 --> 00:05:24,320 Ah. Oh, yeah, Dave. Right. Of course. 104 00:05:25,336 --> 00:05:27,304 Listen, Dave, 105 00:05:28,226 --> 00:05:30,035 did we play Lego last night? 106 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:33,570 You were so pissed. 107 00:05:33,646 --> 00:05:35,535 Ah, shit. 108 00:05:36,456 --> 00:05:38,379 I haven't drunk in months. 109 00:05:38,664 --> 00:05:41,235 We promised to Alice just to... 110 00:05:42,438 --> 00:05:44,008 How come you're so un-hungover? 111 00:05:44,084 --> 00:05:46,132 Well, constitution of an ox, me. 112 00:05:46,211 --> 00:05:50,614 Ah. Constitution of an ox, cock of a horse. 113 00:05:50,708 --> 00:05:54,633 Throw another shrimp on the barbie, I just fucked Crocodile Dundee. 114 00:05:55,806 --> 00:05:56,887 Hmm. 115 00:05:56,970 --> 00:05:58,779 - I could do with a cup of tea. - Oh? 116 00:06:00,463 --> 00:06:01,749 Be a gentleman. 117 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:07,046 - Your all-time favourite flavour jam? - Gooseberry. Easy. 118 00:06:07,129 --> 00:06:08,369 Morning. 119 00:06:08,614 --> 00:06:10,184 And, good morning. 120 00:06:10,260 --> 00:06:12,866 Morning all, this is Dave, doing the walk of shame. 121 00:06:12,950 --> 00:06:14,793 - Take a seat, Dave, get some cereal. - Hi, Dave. 122 00:06:14,877 --> 00:06:16,163 - Hi, Dave. - Hello. 123 00:06:16,242 --> 00:06:18,324 I always find tea goes better without sugar. 124 00:06:18,410 --> 00:06:19,491 Yeah. 125 00:06:20,176 --> 00:06:21,257 Great arms, Dave. 126 00:06:21,903 --> 00:06:23,712 Oh, cheers, you know, I'm a builder. 127 00:06:23,830 --> 00:06:26,037 - Oh, 10, then? - No, just the one. 128 00:06:26,118 --> 00:06:27,199 Just one. 129 00:06:27,643 --> 00:06:28,724 I'm gonna get changed first. 130 00:06:28,808 --> 00:06:29,934 All right. 131 00:06:30,333 --> 00:06:31,459 Oof! 132 00:06:31,738 --> 00:06:33,342 Back of the net, Richie! 133 00:06:33,424 --> 00:06:36,587 Ah, OMG! Ah! He's gorgeous. 134 00:06:36,676 --> 00:06:39,998 Huh? Did you check out the guns? I think I'd rate him as lush. 135 00:06:43,059 --> 00:06:44,424 - What are you doing? - Sorry. 136 00:06:45,508 --> 00:06:46,794 That's all right. 137 00:06:48,439 --> 00:06:49,520 Mmm-mmm. 138 00:06:51,088 --> 00:06:52,931 I did have a great time last night. 139 00:06:56,026 --> 00:06:57,152 So... 140 00:06:58,595 --> 00:07:01,838 That's my number, give us a call if you wanna have another play. 141 00:07:01,927 --> 00:07:05,648 Yeah, yeah, I will do, have fun b... buildering. 142 00:07:06,263 --> 00:07:07,753 All right, cheers. 143 00:07:08,230 --> 00:07:09,311 See you. 144 00:07:19,832 --> 00:07:21,072 Dave. 145 00:07:25,894 --> 00:07:29,023 Don't you judge me. At Least I've got a nose. 146 00:07:29,828 --> 00:07:32,672 I won't lie to you, it's like a bereavement. 147 00:07:33,843 --> 00:07:35,368 The loss of your old life. 148 00:07:39,102 --> 00:07:40,183 Thoughts? 149 00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:42,318 Now, the floor is yours. 150 00:07:43,157 --> 00:07:45,763 - Alice? - Well, Antonia, 151 00:07:47,211 --> 00:07:48,975 I like to have a little bit of a lot of fun. 152 00:07:49,861 --> 00:07:51,431 And, I guess now I'm gonna miss that. 153 00:07:52,390 --> 00:07:54,313 And I'm going to miss my immaturity. 154 00:07:55,682 --> 00:07:58,288 Antonia, I'm really going to miss my immaturity. 155 00:07:59,656 --> 00:08:01,704 Oh, Jesus, does that sound really bad out loud? 156 00:08:01,784 --> 00:08:03,149 - Yes. - Okay. 157 00:08:04,273 --> 00:08:05,354 Richie? 158 00:08:05,437 --> 00:08:07,201 How would you react to the words, 159 00:08:07,846 --> 00:08:12,613 "casual, random and sex"? 160 00:08:13,466 --> 00:08:15,707 "Multiple partners... 161 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:18,407 "Male." 162 00:08:18,926 --> 00:08:20,052 Not well. 163 00:08:23,422 --> 00:08:26,471 Enlighten us, Mitch. What are you gonna miss about your old life? 164 00:08:27,437 --> 00:08:28,643 Nothing. 165 00:08:30,287 --> 00:08:32,369 - Nothing? - Nothing. 166 00:08:32,495 --> 00:08:34,543 - Nothing? - Nothing. 167 00:08:35,988 --> 00:08:39,117 I'm having a baby with the people I love most in the world. 168 00:08:40,283 --> 00:08:41,409 I can't wait. 169 00:08:45,021 --> 00:08:48,821 - And, naturally, that too, of course. - I was gonna say the same thing. 170 00:08:49,115 --> 00:08:50,560 We're gonna have to stop thinking about ourselves, 171 00:08:50,641 --> 00:08:52,211 start thinking about the baby. 172 00:08:52,287 --> 00:08:54,130 New life, new rules. 173 00:08:54,214 --> 00:08:55,943 You know, we're gonna have to start paying attention. 174 00:08:56,020 --> 00:08:59,024 What we need to do is focus on the baby's well-being. 175 00:08:59,112 --> 00:09:01,797 Yep. The old responsibility, eyes at the back of our heads. 176 00:09:01,882 --> 00:09:04,010 - Stop, look, listen. - Eyes wide open. 177 00:09:04,090 --> 00:09:06,855 Multi-tasking with the best of them. Basically, 178 00:09:07,502 --> 00:09:09,186 - we need to be more like Mitch. - Yeah. 179 00:09:24,403 --> 00:09:25,734 Thank you. 180 00:09:26,612 --> 00:09:28,262 No, Richie, I actually don't know if I can do this. 181 00:09:28,338 --> 00:09:31,581 Thank God we've got Mitch. We just need to be more like him. 182 00:09:31,670 --> 00:09:33,195 Whoo! Bit epic. 183 00:09:33,276 --> 00:09:35,358 - Where the hell were you? - I was with... 184 00:09:37,532 --> 00:09:39,660 We were having a proper heart-to-heart here. 185 00:09:45,601 --> 00:09:48,081 Frankenstein, that's us. 186 00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:50,571 Created a monster we can't control. 187 00:09:50,659 --> 00:09:54,584 I've always said, Alice, nothing good ever came out of vaginae. 188 00:09:56,922 --> 00:09:58,924 I always said the fear was in your heads, 189 00:09:59,009 --> 00:10:00,420 and now I'm gonna prove it. 190 00:10:00,655 --> 00:10:03,738 May I present to you, robot baby. 191 00:10:04,308 --> 00:10:06,197 Yeah, I borrowed it from antenatal. 192 00:10:06,276 --> 00:10:08,847 It's like a real baby, but it's a robot. 193 00:10:08,925 --> 00:10:10,848 It cries when it needs changing, 194 00:10:11,615 --> 00:10:15,461 it cries when it needs feeding and it cries when it needs bathing. Oh. 195 00:10:15,549 --> 00:10:17,631 See, I put it down. 196 00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,162 Oh. 197 00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:20,324 But, I pick it up. 198 00:10:20,407 --> 00:10:21,454 Hey! 199 00:10:21,531 --> 00:10:23,499 I put it down. 200 00:10:23,578 --> 00:10:24,784 And I pick it up. 201 00:10:25,224 --> 00:10:26,464 Yay! 202 00:10:26,549 --> 00:10:29,553 Huh? This is your hands-on experience, 203 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:32,325 so you can see what brilliant parents you're gonna be. 204 00:10:33,454 --> 00:10:34,535 - Oh. - Sorry. 205 00:10:48,300 --> 00:10:49,745 Alice. 206 00:10:50,428 --> 00:10:51,839 Alice. 207 00:10:54,523 --> 00:10:56,688 - Alice. - Get off, ten more minutes. 208 00:10:56,771 --> 00:10:58,532 Oh, come on, princess. It's your turn. 209 00:10:58,618 --> 00:11:00,108 - It's not. - It is. 210 00:11:00,183 --> 00:11:02,185 - It's not. - Look, I did it last time! 211 00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:11,214 Poor little thing, it's so sad. 212 00:11:17,446 --> 00:11:19,687 - There we go, all better. - Alice! 213 00:11:19,774 --> 00:11:22,698 Alice, you can't! Alice! 214 00:11:22,785 --> 00:11:25,994 If this was a real baby, you'd be in ever such a lot of trouble. 215 00:11:35,752 --> 00:11:37,800 Oh. Hey? 216 00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:40,761 Silly Irish mummy. Eh? 217 00:11:46,391 --> 00:11:47,597 That's it now. 218 00:11:50,285 --> 00:11:51,730 We're just gonna sleep. 219 00:12:15,135 --> 00:12:16,546 I'm gonna be a parent. 220 00:12:17,463 --> 00:12:19,272 Now, that makes me an adult. 221 00:12:19,350 --> 00:12:20,920 What, am I scared of being an adult? 222 00:12:20,996 --> 00:12:23,602 Yeah, you're asking me that while sitting on a swing. 223 00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:25,449 There. 224 00:12:25,532 --> 00:12:26,613 All settled. 225 00:12:27,138 --> 00:12:28,219 Here you go, Richie. 226 00:12:28,945 --> 00:12:30,595 Take the baby, Richie. 227 00:12:30,992 --> 00:12:32,562 Very gently, come on. 228 00:12:32,999 --> 00:12:36,367 - There we go. Gently, gently, gently. - All right. 229 00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:39,298 - Oh! - Oh, Richie. 230 00:12:39,382 --> 00:12:42,864 I didn't do anything. It sensed my fear. Here, take it back. 231 00:12:42,955 --> 00:12:45,720 No, Richie, you're the robot baby father. 232 00:12:45,846 --> 00:12:48,895 It's time you started taking your robot baby responsibilities seriously. 233 00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:51,867 I'm bouncing it, I'm bouncing it! Faster, slower, what? 234 00:12:51,948 --> 00:12:53,279 If its eyes are rolling back like that, 235 00:12:53,353 --> 00:12:55,481 you're probably doing it too fast, Richard! 236 00:12:56,243 --> 00:12:59,247 - Oh, honey, I think I need an ice cream. - Oh, do you want an ice cream? 237 00:12:59,897 --> 00:13:01,740 - I'll take an ice cream. - You don't deserve any ice cream. 238 00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:02,950 - Alice! - No. 239 00:13:06,962 --> 00:13:09,249 Why am I always left holding the robot baby? 240 00:13:09,331 --> 00:13:10,537 Richie? 241 00:13:11,659 --> 00:13:12,820 Dave! 242 00:13:13,345 --> 00:13:14,471 Oh, look at the guns on him. 243 00:13:14,625 --> 00:13:15,786 What are you doing here, then? 244 00:13:16,148 --> 00:13:18,754 Ah, just enjoying the peace and quiet, you know. 245 00:13:18,838 --> 00:13:19,919 Hmm. 246 00:13:21,830 --> 00:13:23,355 - You gonna get that? - Hmm? 247 00:13:24,199 --> 00:13:25,485 Get the... 248 00:13:26,728 --> 00:13:28,969 Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah. 249 00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:34,796 This is my robot baby. 250 00:13:34,998 --> 00:13:37,649 We were playing robot baby hide-and-seek, weren't we? 251 00:13:38,209 --> 00:13:40,496 Sure. Yeah. Well, you have a threesome with your best friends, 252 00:13:40,578 --> 00:13:41,659 you get a robot baby. 253 00:13:41,742 --> 00:13:44,791 God, I think it hates me, Dave. 254 00:13:45,716 --> 00:13:47,081 It hates me. 255 00:13:47,443 --> 00:13:51,084 How am I gonna cope with a child that doesn't run on batteries, hmm? 256 00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:53,186 Well, have a go with a real one. 257 00:13:54,147 --> 00:13:59,108 - This is Callum, my nephew. - Oh, God. 258 00:14:00,008 --> 00:14:01,851 - Come on. - No, no. No, no, no. 259 00:14:02,056 --> 00:14:03,421 - I can't. - Of course, you can. 260 00:14:03,501 --> 00:14:04,548 I, I... 261 00:14:04,625 --> 00:14:05,706 You won't hurt. You're just one, aren't you? 262 00:14:05,789 --> 00:14:07,837 - Go on. - What if I drop him? 263 00:14:07,917 --> 00:14:10,045 His parachute will automatically deploy. 264 00:14:10,607 --> 00:14:11,733 It won't, don't drop him. 265 00:14:11,811 --> 00:14:12,972 All right. Okay, okay. 266 00:14:13,738 --> 00:14:14,864 Hold on. How do I hold him? 267 00:14:14,942 --> 00:14:16,068 Just put your arms out. 268 00:14:16,147 --> 00:14:18,149 Gayby. Gay dads. 269 00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:20,644 Is that your gay gayby? 270 00:14:20,763 --> 00:14:24,529 No. No, no. It's not like that. But... 271 00:14:24,617 --> 00:14:25,857 What if it is? 272 00:14:26,223 --> 00:14:29,113 No, what if it is? Yeah, what if he's my boyfriend, 273 00:14:29,194 --> 00:14:31,003 we're in man-love and this is our gay baby? 274 00:14:32,245 --> 00:14:33,895 Huh, what if it is? 275 00:14:33,971 --> 00:14:35,461 Hold him. Hold him. 276 00:14:36,259 --> 00:14:38,261 Yeah? Little gobshites. 277 00:14:38,347 --> 00:14:40,349 You want to take on a kickboxer? Eh? 278 00:14:40,716 --> 00:14:43,322 - Be my guest, come on! - All right, mate. 279 00:14:49,949 --> 00:14:51,792 - Oh, my God. - I know. 280 00:14:51,876 --> 00:14:53,958 Yeah, but the point of training is never having to use it. 281 00:14:54,044 --> 00:14:57,366 No. Oh, my God, I'm holding a baby. 282 00:14:59,263 --> 00:15:00,913 I have something of yours. 283 00:15:02,555 --> 00:15:05,126 Tell me, what is it about you and Lego? 284 00:15:05,204 --> 00:15:08,606 I don't know, I just really liked it when I was a kid. 285 00:15:08,898 --> 00:15:10,423 Then, I got older and discovered boys, 286 00:15:10,503 --> 00:15:12,949 and then I got older still and discovered that, half the time, 287 00:15:13,032 --> 00:15:14,079 I still prefer Lego. 288 00:15:14,157 --> 00:15:15,807 Yeah, yeah. 289 00:15:15,883 --> 00:15:21,094 Listen, Dave, I was gonna call, promise. Just... 290 00:15:21,262 --> 00:15:23,264 No, I get it. No, you're a busy boy. 291 00:15:23,350 --> 00:15:26,194 And, it's not that I'm only capable of one-night stands, it's just... 292 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:29,329 You are like me, five years ago, in a flick-book relationship. 293 00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:32,298 - What are you talking about? - Well, you know how a flick-book, 294 00:15:32,383 --> 00:15:34,954 - it's got loads of separate pictures. - Yes, I know what a flick-book is. 295 00:15:35,032 --> 00:15:37,478 Well, you flick them together, and it looks like one moving image. 296 00:15:37,561 --> 00:15:39,165 Well, you've had so many one-night stands, 297 00:15:39,247 --> 00:15:41,409 that they look like a relationship. 298 00:15:50,890 --> 00:15:51,971 Hey? 299 00:15:54,302 --> 00:15:56,225 - Alice made it for me. - Hey! 300 00:15:56,309 --> 00:15:58,073 "World's Best Dad." 301 00:15:58,156 --> 00:16:00,557 - Aw, you deserve that, mate. - I know. 302 00:16:01,769 --> 00:16:04,693 So. Dave. 303 00:16:05,462 --> 00:16:06,668 You gonna call him? 304 00:16:07,510 --> 00:16:08,636 No. 305 00:16:09,075 --> 00:16:11,123 No, I don't deserve Dave, mate. 306 00:16:11,203 --> 00:16:14,889 I'm not grown-up enough to have a grown-up relationship. 307 00:16:15,739 --> 00:16:17,821 Richie, you've got to love someone, 308 00:16:18,871 --> 00:16:22,273 and Let them Love you back. Otherwise, you're just half a person. 309 00:16:26,619 --> 00:16:28,348 Oh, and remember, 310 00:16:28,425 --> 00:16:31,395 antenatal class is coming later. I'm off to buy finger food. 311 00:16:31,476 --> 00:16:33,922 I'm feeling hummus. 312 00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:51,407 Alice, mind the baby. I'm going for a wank. 313 00:16:52,377 --> 00:16:54,186 Sure thing, Casanova. 314 00:17:09,318 --> 00:17:12,322 Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! 315 00:17:13,132 --> 00:17:16,136 Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! 316 00:17:17,267 --> 00:17:19,554 - Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! - Alice! 317 00:17:19,636 --> 00:17:23,357 - Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! - Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! 318 00:17:23,449 --> 00:17:26,020 Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! Shit! Fuck! 319 00:17:26,099 --> 00:17:28,386 Oh, Jesus! Ahh! 320 00:17:28,468 --> 00:17:29,833 I'm gonna dry him off in the oven. 321 00:17:29,913 --> 00:17:31,074 Are you mad? 322 00:17:31,157 --> 00:17:32,522 Ahhh! Oh, my God. 323 00:17:32,603 --> 00:17:33,934 I'm so confused! 324 00:17:34,008 --> 00:17:37,217 Just calm down. In the oven! You'll bloody melt the thing. 325 00:17:37,300 --> 00:17:40,463 Mitch is gonna kill us! He's gonna kill us, he's gonna come and kill us! 326 00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,757 - Go and get me the hair dryer. - Okay. 327 00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:43,921 We'll sort this out. 328 00:17:44,004 --> 00:17:45,130 Shit! 329 00:17:52,555 --> 00:17:54,478 - Is it all right? - It's all right. 330 00:18:07,408 --> 00:18:10,252 Alice, antenatal class are coming. 331 00:18:10,821 --> 00:18:13,188 Stuff from my mum. Old dolls. 332 00:18:15,879 --> 00:18:17,005 Spare parts, spare parts. 333 00:18:18,810 --> 00:18:19,936 Oh. 334 00:18:21,740 --> 00:18:23,265 Ahhh! 335 00:18:23,587 --> 00:18:25,351 Give me eyes. Eyes. 336 00:18:25,434 --> 00:18:26,879 - Her eyes? - What? 337 00:18:27,923 --> 00:18:30,290 Listen to me, woman, a leg. 338 00:18:30,934 --> 00:18:32,015 Legs. 339 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,128 - I think, maybe we... - We broke the baby. 340 00:19:06,492 --> 00:19:07,982 I'm so sorry, Antonia. 341 00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:10,510 There's probably a rule about that? 342 00:19:13,799 --> 00:19:16,530 And you don't think that adds a touch of character? 343 00:19:18,616 --> 00:19:20,903 We won't fail the course, will we? 344 00:19:20,985 --> 00:19:24,512 It's not that sort of course, unfortunately. 345 00:19:24,919 --> 00:19:27,160 Could you pass that around for me, please, Antonia? 346 00:19:28,050 --> 00:19:29,461 - Of course. - Thank you. 347 00:19:31,382 --> 00:19:34,147 Honey, the fear hasn't gone away, 348 00:19:34,233 --> 00:19:35,803 the fear is 10 times worse. 349 00:19:37,605 --> 00:19:38,652 Okay. 350 00:19:39,652 --> 00:19:42,132 Hi, okay, can I have everyone's attention, please? 351 00:19:42,222 --> 00:19:43,428 Thank you. 352 00:19:43,988 --> 00:19:45,513 Come on, 353 00:19:45,594 --> 00:19:48,279 I've seen the way you've all been looking at us, and let's be honest, 354 00:19:49,207 --> 00:19:52,529 put your hand in the air, if you're terrified of being a bad parent. 355 00:19:53,382 --> 00:19:54,508 Hmm? 356 00:19:54,867 --> 00:19:56,073 Come on, Neville. 357 00:19:56,995 --> 00:19:59,077 Commit, brother, get it up. There we are. 358 00:19:59,163 --> 00:20:01,689 Now, keep 'em in the air if you think that being a good parent 359 00:20:01,772 --> 00:20:03,376 is about picking up the pieces. 360 00:20:04,141 --> 00:20:07,304 Yes, because that's what Richie and Alice have done today. 361 00:20:07,754 --> 00:20:10,075 They put that baby back together with love, 362 00:20:10,644 --> 00:20:12,009 and bits of sticky tape. 363 00:20:15,703 --> 00:20:18,752 Now, keep your hand in the air if you wanna make love to me. 364 00:20:20,641 --> 00:20:21,767 Yes. 365 00:20:22,648 --> 00:20:23,934 Antonia? 366 00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:57,947 Dave, hi. Hi, it's Richie, listen, 367 00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:02,117 I was wondering, do you wanna come around and play? 368 00:21:02,167 --> 00:21:06,717 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 26701

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