Original subtitles

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SCARFACE: Well, you said we should try makin' our own money.

Now we'll be makin' as much as we want of it.

[LAUGHING]

Sir, um, I meant we should try making honest money.

Ow! Shut up, dummy.

When I want your opinion, I'll give it to ya.

Uh, yes, sir. Sorry, Mr. Scarface, sir.

Now, grab those plates.

BATMAN: I see you're still carrying

that dead weight around.

Believe me, Batman, I've tried ditchin' the bum,

but he follows me everywhere I go.

[LAUGHS]

I was talking to The Ventriloquist.

Well, talk to this!

[WHIMPERING]

SCARFACE: Pennies from heaven.

[GRUNTING]

[LAUGHING]

Don't forget your change.

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Look whose face is gonna be on the new nickel.

[LAUGHS]

[GRUNTING]

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[GRUNTS]

Huh?

Out of the fryin' pan

and into the fire.

[LAUGHING]

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

Run, dummy.

[HEAVY THUD]

[SCARFACE & VENTRILOQUIST GROANING]

Tails, you lose.

STRANGE: For today's exercise

I want each of you to reach deep within your criminal minds

and have a one-on-one with the innocent voice within.

Mine's not talking.

Must be a mime.

Uh...very well, Joker.

Anyone else care to share?

I'd like to share somethin'.

I don't belong in here with the rest of you nutjobs.

Ooh.

Little old to be playin' with dolls, aren't ya?

Who are you callin' "doll"?

I'll make you eat that monocle!

[LAUGHING] Oh, he's--

He's only goofing on you.

Maybe you would like to eat the monocle.

You have quite an interesting friend there, Mr. Wesker.

Tell me, why do you allow him to speak to you that way?

The dummy's lucky I speak to him at all.

Fascinating.

STRANGE: Oh, Mr. Wesker.

After listening to you today,

I would like to propose a radical treatment program,

one which I believe might yield dramatic results.

W-w-well, we'll do whatever will make us

upstanding citizens, Professor Strange.

Speak for yourself, dummy.

Oh, no, no, Mr. Wesker.

This treatment is not intended

for the both of you.

[SCARFACE YELLING]

What are you doin'?

Let go of me.

[MUFFLED YELLING]

Oh, no.

Now, there is someone whom I would like you to meet.

[CROWD CHEERING]

GRANGE: Children are Gotham's greatest resource.

And the new interactive children's museum

will help their minds grow strong.

[AUDIENCE CLAPPING]

Now it gives me great pleasure

to introduce the key architect of this undertaking,

Mr. Bruce Wayne.

[PLANE SOARING]

Hey, what's that? Look.

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[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

Thank you, Mayor Grange.

The dramatic entrance is intended to represent

that, while I may fall from the sky,

money doesn't.

Which is why Wayne Industries will provide the funds necessary

to transform Gotham's old fish cannery

into its future pride,

the Discoverdrome.

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

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STRANGE: Congratulations, Arnold Wesker.

You are a free man, in more ways than one.

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[SIGHS]

Thank you, Professor Strange.

Thank you for everything.

[SOBBING]

[HUMMING]

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What is it, Alfred?

The Discoverdrome invitations arrived misspelled, sir.

Apparently, you are hosting

a farty.

Not a good time. I'm tracking Arnold Wesker.

The Ventriloquist? Wasn't he declared cured, sir?

Maybe too soon.

The Batwave recorded him talking about doing a job.

And the upscale penthouse I'm staring at

would fall into that category.

I just don't see Wesker having the nerve

to go through with it without his little friend.

Unless he smuggled Scarface out of Arkham.

Wesker's making his move.

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Show's over, Ventrilo--

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[CHILD CRYING]

[GOOFY LAUGH]

Will you be my friend?

This is your...job?

Entertaining children.

I have a new life now, Batman.

And thanks to Professor Strange,

a silly new friend.

I'm Mr. Snoots. My favorite color is green.

What's yours?

[WHISTLE TOOTS]

ANNOUNCER: You may not know his face,

but you remember the voices

of the many wacky characters he performed

on TV's beloved Cockamamie Junction.

After the show's cancellation,

puppeteer Arnold Wesker took a new act on the road

with little success.

In a bizarre twist,

Wesker developed a true split personality

and embarked on a life of crime,

becoming the underworld kingpin

known as The Ventriloquist.

Now, after extensive therapy,

Arnold Wesker is having a fresh start

at what he does best,

bringing children joy.

Who wants candy?

[LAUGHS]

Rather unsettling, if you ask me.

I'm hoping Wesker's rehabilitation is for real.

I think I'll consult with Arkham's Chief of Psychiatry,

Hugo Strange.

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STRANGE: Well, I'm most certain Arnold Wesker would be delighted

to perform at your gala, Mr. Wayne.

I'm just a little concerned

that the valuables at our fund-raising auction

might provide a temptation for him.

Are you certain Wesker's cured?

I'm certain that Arnold Wesker can be trusted,

as long as Scarface stays out of the picture.

You've put my mind at ease, professor.

My pleasure, Mr. Wayne.

[DOOR CLOSES]

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Of course, should Scarface

reappear...

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WESKER: Oh. Do you hear that, Mr. Snoots?

A big job.

Hot diggity!

I know the kids will love your performance.

There's also gonna be a fund-raising auction

of some extremely valuable sports memorabilia.

Wow. Snooterrific.

Well, thank you, Mr. Snoots.

I'll see you, and your buddy, Arnold, Saturday night.

Have a silly day.

Well, sir?

Wesker seems okay. I sure hope that's the case.

[HUMMING]

Mr. Snoots, I thought we'd celebrate tonight.

Your favorite, chocolate chip pancakes.

Mr. Snoots?

Where are you?

Mr. Snoots?

Mr. Snoots?

Have you been snacking between meals again?

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[GASPS]

Oh, no, no, no.

SCARFACE: Hello, dummy.

[GASPS]

[

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You!

How could you?!

For once I was happy!

Why couldn't you stay out of my life?!

[SOBS]

Because you owe me...

dummy.

You left me there to rot in the can.

I'm-- I'm sorry, sir.

They told me you were gone, for good.

Well, you better not ever double cross me again,

you little rat.

Yes, sir. You're the boss.

That's right.

Now let's get the old gang back together.

I hear we have a big job to do.

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Big night, Bruce.

Let's hope tonight's patrons step up to the plate.

Some of these items are worth a fortune.

I'm sorry to interrupt, Mayor Grange,

but Mr. Wayne has a call.

Take a message please, Alfred.

It is rather urgent.

[CLEARS THROAT]

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Excuse me, mayor.

Sure, Bruce.

Aw. How come you get to be the dinosaur, Mugsy?

[LAUGHS] You look ridiculous.

No, Rhino, you look like a smile that's been kissed by a rainbow.

Stop talking like that.

And youse two,

just stay in character until I give the signal.

What is it, commissioner?

An anonymous tip?

Wesker's gonna hit the gala.

I see.

Mr. Snoots,

can I have a hug?

Kid, touch me and I will destroy you.

Mom!

Have a silly day.

Why did you have to make him cry?

The crying's just startin'.

Release the onion gas, boys.

[CROWD SCREAMING]

[BOTH COUGHING]

[THUDS]

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SCARFACE: Careful.

They ain't worth squat damaged.

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[GRUNTS]

How'd he get the jump on us?

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

Get the Bat.

SCARFACE: Not the baseball bats, you morons,

those are priceless.

Try whackin' the Bat

with somethin' we're not stealin'!

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SCARFACE: I smell a rat.

Only one way the Bat could have found us so quick.

Someone dropped a dime on our little caper.

It wasn't me, boss. Me neither.

I know who.

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You-- You think it was me?

I didn't do it. Honest.

Save it, stoolie. You sold us out.

Didn't I warn you about

double-crossin' me again, dummy?

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Please don't do this, sir. It wasn't me.

I know it was you, Arnie.

You broke my heart.

You broke my heart.

Let her rip, boys.

[WHIMPERING]

Here it comes. Next stop, your face.

Help!

TRAIN: Climb aboard!

Get the Bat.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Climb aboard!

[SIGHS]

[GRUNTS]

[GASPS]

VENTRILOQUIST: Help!

Free yourself, Wesker.

You don't have to let Scarface control you.

[GRUNTING]

I'm sorry, sir, but you leave me no choice.

Will you just lie there, dummy?

Yes, sir. Sorry.

Here comes Choo-Choo Chucky.

[GRUNTS]

Chugga-chugga, choo-choo!

Now you pay for rattin' me out.

Wesker wasn't your rat.

It was him.

Mr. Snoots?

He's the rat?

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

It's true, I called the police.

Well, I'm gonna turn you inside out.

Bring it on.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

Howdy, partner!

[BOTH GASP]

SCARFACE: I'm gonna wipe that stupid smile off your face,

once and for all.

Ha! Ho, ho!

Ha! Wha! Ha, ha, ha, ha!

[YELLS]

No!

[CRUNCH]

End of the line!

[SOBBING]

He was the most special guy

in the whole wide wonderful world.

If you're referring to Mr. Snoots,

there may be hope for you yet.

BATMAN: You planted Scarface in Wesker's apartment.

Why?

I had to put my treatment to the test, Batman.

You know, to see if the criminal mind

can ever really be cured.

I don't approve of your methods, Professor Strange.

Says the man who dresses like a bat.

I'll be watching you.

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