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1
00:00:01,524 --> 00:00:04,058
All right, let's start
with the good news.
2
00:00:04,083 --> 00:00:07,266
Jane and Rafael
were together and happy.
3
00:00:07,291 --> 00:00:10,448
Also happy?
Petra and her lawyer, J.R.
4
00:00:10,628 --> 00:00:12,271
Mmm, baby.
5
00:00:12,296 --> 00:00:14,725
Oh, and speaking of Baby,
remember this?
6
00:00:14,750 --> 00:00:17,617
We have finally found
the perfect nanny.
7
00:00:17,765 --> 00:00:19,028
Felicia Romero.
8
00:00:19,053 --> 00:00:20,586
I have a better idea.
9
00:00:21,319 --> 00:00:23,686
A baby needs her father,
which is why
10
00:00:23,711 --> 00:00:25,498
I will take the next year off.
11
00:00:25,523 --> 00:00:26,651
Only problem?
12
00:00:26,676 --> 00:00:28,251
He's not going to stay home
much longer
13
00:00:28,253 --> 00:00:29,752
because his American version
14
00:00:29,754 --> 00:00:31,685
of The Passions of Santos
just got the green light.
15
00:00:31,710 --> 00:00:33,406
We are officially going to make
16
00:00:33,431 --> 00:00:35,280
The Passions
of Steve and Brenda:
17
00:00:35,305 --> 00:00:38,673
The First Co-Presidents
of the United States.
18
00:00:38,698 --> 00:00:40,698
Oh, and speaking of
the United States,
19
00:00:40,755 --> 00:00:43,551
you recall Alba's been
on the path to citizenship,
20
00:00:43,576 --> 00:00:45,744
and she's also had to deal
with some romantic drama
21
00:00:45,769 --> 00:00:46,768
of her own.
22
00:00:46,793 --> 00:00:48,088
See, Jorge proposed,
23
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:50,752
but she turned him down...
twice.
24
00:00:50,886 --> 00:00:53,948
And then she changed her mind,
but it was too late.
25
00:00:55,573 --> 00:00:57,890
I know. Talk about heartbreak.
26
00:00:58,012 --> 00:01:00,046
Which brings us to Xiomara.
27
00:01:00,111 --> 00:01:03,415
See, she recently learned she
has stage III breast cancer,
28
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,670
so she had to make
some big decisions.
29
00:01:05,695 --> 00:01:08,635
I've actually decided
to have a single mastectomy.
30
00:01:09,208 --> 00:01:11,503
And so she had the surgery,
31
00:01:11,528 --> 00:01:12,876
which, my friends,
32
00:01:12,901 --> 00:01:15,157
is where we left off.
33
00:01:16,185 --> 00:01:19,649
When Jane Gloriana Villanueva
was 18 years old,
34
00:01:20,018 --> 00:01:22,322
something truly horrific
happened.
35
00:01:27,572 --> 00:01:29,258
No!
36
00:01:29,628 --> 00:01:31,238
She missed Arturo finding out
37
00:01:31,263 --> 00:01:33,226
that his bride Victoria
was actually
38
00:01:33,251 --> 00:01:35,511
his long-lost sisteron Te Amo Pero Te Odio.
39
00:01:35,536 --> 00:01:36,783
All right, that's it.
40
00:01:37,266 --> 00:01:38,510
No more putting it off.
41
00:01:38,535 --> 00:01:39,934
We're getting a new TV.
42
00:01:39,959 --> 00:01:41,238
And that, friends,
43
00:01:41,263 --> 00:01:42,629
was when the Villanueva women
44
00:01:42,654 --> 00:01:43,954
got to work.
45
00:01:45,393 --> 00:01:47,150
And, as with all families,
46
00:01:47,175 --> 00:01:48,728
each had a part to play.
47
00:01:48,753 --> 00:01:50,786
Okay, I've narrowed it down
to three choices
48
00:01:50,811 --> 00:01:52,744
based off price, size,
and picture quality.
49
00:01:52,769 --> 00:01:54,643
Jane was the researcher.
50
00:01:59,175 --> 00:02:00,892
Alba was the caretaker.
51
00:02:00,917 --> 00:02:03,561
Okay, I will, but look.
This is my top choice,
52
00:02:03,586 --> 00:02:04,854
and normally
it's out of our price range,
53
00:02:04,889 --> 00:02:08,417
but I found a coupon
in the paper for 25% off.
54
00:02:09,810 --> 00:02:11,247
Oh, my God. It expires today.
55
00:02:11,272 --> 00:02:12,744
And the store closes
at 6:00 p.m.
56
00:02:13,064 --> 00:02:15,268
What?
It's 5:45. Let's go!
57
00:02:15,293 --> 00:02:16,308
And Xo...
58
00:02:16,309 --> 00:02:17,508
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
59
00:02:17,629 --> 00:02:19,010
It's 5:58!
60
00:02:19,012 --> 00:02:21,216
Oh, sorry. We're closed.
Come back tomorrow.
61
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:23,291
Well, she was the whoop ass.
62
00:02:23,316 --> 00:02:25,026
Oh, hell no, junior.
63
00:02:25,051 --> 00:02:26,697
We have 90 seconds left,
64
00:02:26,722 --> 00:02:28,022
so unless you want your boss
65
00:02:28,024 --> 00:02:29,423
to know that you closed early,
66
00:02:29,448 --> 00:02:31,805
punch back in
or I'll punch you out.
67
00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,486
I got the new TV.
68
00:02:38,088 --> 00:02:39,420
Full price.
69
00:02:39,445 --> 00:02:40,744
I made sure to get a good one.
70
00:02:40,769 --> 00:02:42,929
None of that discounted crap.
71
00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:44,814
My only request
72
00:02:44,839 --> 00:02:47,606
is that you never watch my shows
in ultra-high-def.
73
00:02:47,944 --> 00:02:49,509
It is not a fair depiction
74
00:02:49,534 --> 00:02:51,055
of my pore size.
75
00:02:51,262 --> 00:02:53,422
You have my word. Thanks, hon.
76
00:02:54,551 --> 00:02:55,482
Baby duty calls.
77
00:02:55,507 --> 00:02:58,486
Yep. In times of crisis, we revert
78
00:02:58,511 --> 00:03:00,415
- to our roles.
- Cool TV.
79
00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:02,378
Can I watch PAW Patrol
with Abuela?
80
00:03:09,489 --> 00:03:11,591
Yep, there's our caretaker.
81
00:03:19,894 --> 00:03:21,827
Yes to fluids, no to plastic.
82
00:03:22,182 --> 00:03:23,827
Use this, Mateo.
83
00:03:24,447 --> 00:03:26,930
I have to send you
guys this article.
84
00:03:26,955 --> 00:03:28,294
It's really interesting.
85
00:03:28,319 --> 00:03:30,588
Basically,
plastic is poisoning us all.
86
00:03:30,618 --> 00:03:31,788
What'd I tell you?
87
00:03:31,813 --> 00:03:33,021
The researcher.
88
00:03:42,079 --> 00:03:43,189
I don't know, Ma.
89
00:03:43,214 --> 00:03:44,933
Just walking around the house
feels like enough.
90
00:03:44,958 --> 00:03:47,075
- I'm still in so much pain.
- No!
91
00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:47,902
Sheila,
92
00:03:47,927 --> 00:03:49,913
Santos never wears peach.
93
00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:51,304
Never ever.
94
00:03:51,387 --> 00:03:53,982
Even if he was playing a peach,
he would wear lavender.
95
00:03:54,007 --> 00:03:56,774
He would be a lavender peach.
96
00:03:56,842 --> 00:03:59,303
Do you understand? Okay.
97
00:03:59,903 --> 00:04:01,066
Oh, I'm sorry.
98
00:04:01,091 --> 00:04:02,657
They just hired the
new costume designer
99
00:04:02,682 --> 00:04:04,716
for Steve and Brenda,
and she's clueless.
100
00:04:05,189 --> 00:04:06,655
Even Baby knows
101
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:08,963
that President
Steven T. Santos
102
00:04:08,988 --> 00:04:10,424
doesn't wear peach.
103
00:04:11,391 --> 00:04:12,990
How are you and Darci doing
104
00:04:12,992 --> 00:04:14,215
on the search for a new nanny?
105
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,800
You haven't told her?
106
00:04:15,825 --> 00:04:16,893
- Dad.
- Rogelio.
107
00:04:16,918 --> 00:04:18,870
I know, I know, but I
made such a big show
108
00:04:18,895 --> 00:04:20,253
about being Baby's nanny,
109
00:04:20,278 --> 00:04:22,391
Darci will rake me over
the coals for backing out.
110
00:04:22,416 --> 00:04:23,753
So I was thinking,
111
00:04:23,778 --> 00:04:26,830
maybe I could bring Baby
with me to work.
112
00:04:26,855 --> 00:04:29,872
You know,
just hand her to a P.A.
113
00:04:29,897 --> 00:04:31,306
when we roll camera.
114
00:04:31,331 --> 00:04:32,978
Rogelio, that's ridiculous.
115
00:04:33,003 --> 00:04:34,392
You have to talk to Darci.
116
00:04:34,417 --> 00:04:35,995
- Well...
- Now!
117
00:04:36,065 --> 00:04:37,249
Don't be a coward.
118
00:04:37,274 --> 00:04:39,240
Yep, there's our whoop ass.
119
00:04:39,242 --> 00:04:40,375
Oh, here's the article.
120
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:43,228
So, it's not just BPA,
although that's bad.
121
00:04:43,253 --> 00:04:44,841
It... uh...
122
00:04:45,439 --> 00:04:46,694
My computer died.
123
00:04:46,719 --> 00:04:48,185
Thank God.
124
00:04:48,502 --> 00:04:50,662
I think I left my charger
at Rafael's.
125
00:04:50,687 --> 00:04:52,076
It's over there
in the kitchen pile.
126
00:04:52,101 --> 00:04:54,673
Or maybe it's by the bed pile.
There are a lot of Jane piles
127
00:04:54,698 --> 00:04:55,959
- in this place.
- Got it.
128
00:04:56,465 --> 00:04:57,772
Well, where are you guys headed?
129
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,496
I got called in early
for a shift,
130
00:04:59,521 --> 00:05:01,455
so I'm dropping them off
at Petra's.
131
00:05:01,842 --> 00:05:03,117
Hey, how's your mom?
132
00:05:03,851 --> 00:05:05,846
Took a few more laps
around the living room today.
133
00:05:05,871 --> 00:05:07,113
Nice.
134
00:05:07,293 --> 00:05:08,993
Oh, want some more good news?
135
00:05:09,018 --> 00:05:10,374
Always.
136
00:05:10,706 --> 00:05:12,397
Mateo's progress report.
137
00:05:12,883 --> 00:05:15,079
- Straight fours.
- What?!
138
00:05:15,205 --> 00:05:17,132
Mateo! That's my boy.
139
00:05:17,883 --> 00:05:20,091
We used to think
four was good, too.
140
00:05:20,152 --> 00:05:22,030
But that's when we thought
it was out of five.
141
00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:23,218
It's out of six.
142
00:05:23,522 --> 00:05:25,210
So it's more of a C-plus.
143
00:05:25,580 --> 00:05:26,841
We got A's.
144
00:05:26,866 --> 00:05:28,566
Well, I am still
very proud of him.
145
00:05:30,337 --> 00:05:32,152
And the two of you
for being such little...
146
00:05:32,556 --> 00:05:33,781
smarties.
147
00:05:34,128 --> 00:05:36,084
- Should we go out and celebrate?
- Yeah.
148
00:05:36,109 --> 00:05:37,308
Can we go bowling?
149
00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:38,609
Of course. Bowling it is.
150
00:05:41,914 --> 00:05:43,548
My charger. Okay.
151
00:05:43,573 --> 00:05:45,484
I have to get back to my mom's.
152
00:05:45,518 --> 00:05:47,124
See you later. I love you.
153
00:05:50,455 --> 00:05:52,169
Did you actually just say that?
154
00:05:52,504 --> 00:05:54,276
Yeah, I guess I did.
155
00:05:54,824 --> 00:05:56,702
Well, I love you, too.
156
00:06:00,439 --> 00:06:01,524
Okay, got to go.
157
00:06:01,549 --> 00:06:02,332
Us, too.
158
00:06:02,333 --> 00:06:04,445
Seriously? Wow.
159
00:06:04,646 --> 00:06:06,203
Talk about anticlimactic.
160
00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,860
OMG, I'm sorry.
161
00:06:09,885 --> 00:06:12,367
It was so anticlimactic,
I forgot to do this.
162
00:06:17,875 --> 00:06:19,851
Sync and correction by LittleDuck
www.addic7ed.com
163
00:06:27,156 --> 00:06:28,211
You're early.
164
00:06:28,236 --> 00:06:30,257
My shift changed.
I've been texting you.
165
00:06:30,836 --> 00:06:32,035
Oh, and before I forget,
166
00:06:32,060 --> 00:06:34,522
Jane planned a family
bowling night for Friday
167
00:06:34,547 --> 00:06:36,428
in honor of everyone's good
progress reports at school.
168
00:06:36,453 --> 00:06:37,785
We'll bowl. Uh, listen,
169
00:06:37,810 --> 00:06:39,086
I need you to keep
the girls occupied.
170
00:06:39,111 --> 00:06:40,771
- What? Why?
- J.R. spent the night.
171
00:06:40,796 --> 00:06:42,756
- She's in the shower.
- Have the girls even met her yet?
172
00:06:42,781 --> 00:06:44,114
No. And I don't think
173
00:06:44,139 --> 00:06:46,239
now is the ideal time,
but you're early.
174
00:06:48,195 --> 00:06:50,697
Who wants to go downstairs
and get some ice cream?
175
00:06:50,868 --> 00:06:52,933
- Yay!
- Okay, love your shower,
176
00:06:52,958 --> 00:06:54,253
hate your...
177
00:06:57,685 --> 00:06:58,738
Who is she?
178
00:06:58,763 --> 00:07:00,207
- My friend.
- Why is your friend
179
00:07:00,232 --> 00:07:01,231
wearing a robe?
180
00:07:01,233 --> 00:07:02,398
Girls, let's go
for that ice cream.
181
00:07:02,423 --> 00:07:04,158
We'll have a nice talk.
182
00:07:05,245 --> 00:07:06,795
I'm sorry about this.
183
00:07:06,820 --> 00:07:08,653
I'm sure it's not how
you wanted to meet the girls.
184
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:10,475
Yeah, I didn't want
to meet them at all.
185
00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:11,502
Excuse me?
186
00:07:12,531 --> 00:07:14,241
Not a kid person.
187
00:07:16,352 --> 00:07:18,223
I'm gonna put some clothes on.
188
00:07:18,554 --> 00:07:19,933
Nice meeting you.
189
00:07:20,928 --> 00:07:22,018
Stop it.
190
00:07:22,043 --> 00:07:23,233
Don't rush to judgment.
191
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:24,600
She said
she didn't like my kids.
192
00:07:24,626 --> 00:07:25,792
Kids in general,
193
00:07:25,817 --> 00:07:27,083
not just yours.
194
00:07:27,381 --> 00:07:28,967
- Although they can be tough.
- Jane.
195
00:07:28,992 --> 00:07:30,554
Just look at it
from her point of view.
196
00:07:30,596 --> 00:07:31,829
She was in a bathrobe.
197
00:07:31,831 --> 00:07:33,230
She wasn't expecting
to see anybody,
198
00:07:33,255 --> 00:07:35,551
and she ended up
meeting the whole family.
199
00:07:36,177 --> 00:07:37,610
You know what?
200
00:07:37,635 --> 00:07:39,802
I'm gonna call Petra
and suggest we all have dinner.
201
00:07:39,804 --> 00:07:40,878
What? No.
202
00:07:40,903 --> 00:07:42,862
Yes. We have a family policy.
203
00:07:43,099 --> 00:07:44,365
J.R. met the kids.
204
00:07:44,390 --> 00:07:45,621
We have to get to know her.
205
00:07:45,646 --> 00:07:47,885
And you have to give her
a chance.
206
00:07:48,251 --> 00:07:50,000
Fine. I'll go to dinner,
207
00:07:50,052 --> 00:07:51,785
but only if you admit
you're really doing this
208
00:07:51,810 --> 00:07:53,170
because you're curious.
209
00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:55,767
So curious.
She makes Petra giggle.
210
00:07:55,792 --> 00:07:57,698
She makes her do
more than that.
211
00:07:57,727 --> 00:08:00,215
But also,
we have a family policy.
212
00:08:00,345 --> 00:08:01,724
And speaking of family
213
00:08:01,749 --> 00:08:02,882
and policy...
214
00:08:02,907 --> 00:08:04,273
Can you please check again?
215
00:08:04,306 --> 00:08:05,965
There must be some mistake.
216
00:08:11,459 --> 00:08:13,986
Okay, yes. I'll be there.
217
00:08:14,325 --> 00:08:15,446
Thank you.
218
00:08:15,694 --> 00:08:16,768
What was that about?
219
00:08:20,974 --> 00:08:21,971
Monday?
220
00:08:21,996 --> 00:08:23,621
That test wasn't supposed to be
for another two months.
221
00:08:23,646 --> 00:08:24,534
I know.
222
00:08:30,495 --> 00:08:32,367
Okay, so ask to reschedule it.
223
00:08:42,340 --> 00:08:43,918
Okay. I'll help you study.
224
00:08:44,002 --> 00:08:45,049
We'll get it done.
225
00:08:49,275 --> 00:08:51,141
What?
226
00:08:54,853 --> 00:08:56,439
Ma, I got to hold off
227
00:08:56,464 --> 00:08:58,753
on that walk outside again.
I'm tired.
228
00:09:05,043 --> 00:09:06,419
What's going on?
229
00:09:07,918 --> 00:09:09,741
Yeah. Everything's great.
230
00:09:09,995 --> 00:09:11,461
Yeah, just a guess?
231
00:09:11,486 --> 00:09:12,947
At some point, Xo's gonna open
232
00:09:12,972 --> 00:09:15,151
that can of whoop ass
on both of them.
233
00:09:19,355 --> 00:09:20,956
Why won't you tell her
about the test date?
234
00:09:24,315 --> 00:09:26,854
You should go home to study.
I'll take care of her.
235
00:09:30,432 --> 00:09:32,518
Well, you need to focus
on your test.
236
00:09:40,975 --> 00:09:42,118
What do you want?
237
00:09:42,143 --> 00:09:43,689
I have to tell you something.
It's important.
238
00:09:43,714 --> 00:09:45,899
Let me guess.
You took a personality test,
239
00:09:45,924 --> 00:09:47,657
and it turns out
you're a narcissistic egomaniac
240
00:09:47,684 --> 00:09:49,918
with a subconscious
inferiority complex.
241
00:09:52,223 --> 00:09:53,666
That's a good one, Darci.
242
00:09:53,691 --> 00:09:55,429
Your sense of humor
is as delightful
243
00:09:55,454 --> 00:09:56,924
as the look on your face.
244
00:09:57,519 --> 00:09:58,627
So?
245
00:09:59,178 --> 00:10:00,315
Spit it out.
246
00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:02,667
Well...
247
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:06,947
it seems circumstances
248
00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:09,047
have conspired...
249
00:10:10,074 --> 00:10:11,684
- in a sense...
- Rogelio.
250
00:10:11,709 --> 00:10:13,342
I can no longer be Baby's nanny.
251
00:10:15,994 --> 00:10:17,125
Wow.
252
00:10:18,655 --> 00:10:20,308
I mean, I knew
this would happen...
253
00:10:20,350 --> 00:10:21,850
That you'd quit... but still,
254
00:10:21,875 --> 00:10:23,538
now that it's happening...
255
00:10:23,697 --> 00:10:26,198
I am so, so angry with you!
256
00:10:26,223 --> 00:10:29,030
Because you do this
all the time! You...
257
00:10:29,055 --> 00:10:30,354
Xo has breast cancer.
258
00:10:32,227 --> 00:10:34,343
A-And I need
to take care of her.
259
00:10:34,870 --> 00:10:36,275
The cancer card?
260
00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:38,204
Really, Rogelio?
261
00:10:38,402 --> 00:10:39,779
What?
262
00:10:40,618 --> 00:10:42,848
Oh, my God, I...
I had no idea.
263
00:10:43,032 --> 00:10:44,583
We've been keeping it quiet.
264
00:10:44,824 --> 00:10:47,586
She just had a mastectomy,
and she's in a lot of pain.
265
00:10:48,003 --> 00:10:49,821
And that is why
I can't be the nanny.
266
00:10:49,846 --> 00:10:52,237
Yeah. That and preproduction.
267
00:10:52,930 --> 00:10:54,150
I'm so sorry.
268
00:10:54,990 --> 00:10:56,895
Of course you need
to be there for Xo.
269
00:10:57,341 --> 00:10:59,524
I'll pick up the slack
as long as you need.
270
00:10:59,589 --> 00:11:01,957
♪ ♪
271
00:11:02,785 --> 00:11:04,046
This needs to be quick.
272
00:11:04,071 --> 00:11:05,537
I convinced J.R.
to come to drinks.
273
00:11:05,562 --> 00:11:06,828
Oh. So she didn't want to?
274
00:11:06,830 --> 00:11:07,996
I didn't want her to.
275
00:11:08,021 --> 00:11:09,887
It is way too early
to introduce you to J.R.
276
00:11:09,912 --> 00:11:11,470
But since you insisted,
you are not allowed
277
00:11:11,495 --> 00:11:12,986
to screw this up
and embarrass me.
278
00:11:13,011 --> 00:11:14,425
Petra, don't worry.
279
00:11:14,450 --> 00:11:15,983
We'll keep it super low-key.
280
00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:17,608
And you'll make sure Raf
doesn't say anything
281
00:11:17,635 --> 00:11:19,416
- overprotective or patronizing?
- Oh, come on.
282
00:11:19,707 --> 00:11:20,964
I wouldn't do that.
283
00:11:21,005 --> 00:11:22,472
You have experience with kids?
284
00:11:22,497 --> 00:11:23,605
So, do you have a car seat?
285
00:11:23,630 --> 00:11:25,030
The three of you are on your roof.
286
00:11:25,055 --> 00:11:26,149
You get locked out.
287
00:11:26,174 --> 00:11:27,198
Do you jump off?
288
00:11:27,412 --> 00:11:28,838
I'm on it.
Don't worry.
289
00:11:29,535 --> 00:11:30,799
Okay. Things not to bring up.
290
00:11:30,978 --> 00:11:32,752
Let's start with the three I's.
291
00:11:32,777 --> 00:11:33,829
Insemination.
292
00:11:34,099 --> 00:11:36,229
A sandwich and the
extra turkey baster.
293
00:11:37,553 --> 00:11:38,832
Infidelity.
294
00:11:40,555 --> 00:11:43,164
And any other...
Indiscretions.
295
00:11:46,252 --> 00:11:48,780
Also, avoid all other
controversial topics,
296
00:11:48,805 --> 00:11:50,304
including, but not limited to,
297
00:11:50,306 --> 00:11:52,987
sex, religion, politics
and the New York Mets.
298
00:11:53,071 --> 00:11:54,716
Is it okay to discuss
the weather?
299
00:11:54,741 --> 00:11:55,940
Don't be condescending.
300
00:11:55,965 --> 00:11:58,135
- And no, J.R. hates small talk.
- Okay. Got it.
301
00:11:58,166 --> 00:12:00,114
- Off to deliver flash cards.
- To Mateo?
302
00:12:00,139 --> 00:12:02,152
Good idea.
I heard about the fours.
303
00:12:03,084 --> 00:12:05,145
No. For my abuela.
304
00:12:54,292 --> 00:12:56,948
So he just happened to mention
they broke up?
305
00:12:57,211 --> 00:12:58,216
No way.
306
00:12:58,241 --> 00:12:59,640
He dropped that info on purpose.
307
00:12:59,673 --> 00:13:01,394
- Mm-hmm.
- She's right.
308
00:13:01,419 --> 00:13:03,362
He totally wanted you
to know he was single.
309
00:13:03,387 --> 00:13:05,088
You should tell him you
still have feelings for him.
310
00:13:14,379 --> 00:13:17,091
Uh, I'm just not quite
strong enough for that yet.
311
00:13:19,162 --> 00:13:20,620
Ma, I'm not ready.
312
00:13:21,590 --> 00:13:22,936
What are those?
313
00:13:26,992 --> 00:13:28,419
They're for my writing.
314
00:13:28,732 --> 00:13:30,058
I left them at work.
315
00:13:30,083 --> 00:13:31,132
Just story plotting.
316
00:13:31,157 --> 00:13:32,770
Thanks for grabbing
them for me, Abuela.
317
00:13:33,232 --> 00:13:36,540
All right.
Time for drinks with J.R.
318
00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,338
Ooh, you have to let us know
what she's like.
319
00:13:38,363 --> 00:13:40,346
I will.
My mission is
320
00:13:40,371 --> 00:13:42,815
just to keep Rafael
from ambushing her.
321
00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:44,698
Which brings us to...
322
00:13:44,789 --> 00:13:46,155
Thanks for sitting down.
323
00:13:46,355 --> 00:13:47,724
This is an important step,
324
00:13:47,909 --> 00:13:49,599
since there are kids involved.
325
00:13:49,624 --> 00:13:51,891
Right. I heard about the "rule"
326
00:13:52,092 --> 00:13:53,302
That's just me.
327
00:13:53,327 --> 00:13:55,427
I love rules.
Structure. Plans.
328
00:13:55,452 --> 00:13:56,685
But...
329
00:13:56,713 --> 00:13:58,664
I obviously do want
to know anyone
330
00:13:58,689 --> 00:14:00,329
who's gonna be spending
significant time
331
00:14:00,354 --> 00:14:01,476
with my children.
332
00:14:01,501 --> 00:14:03,108
Rafael, she's here.
We get it.
333
00:14:04,675 --> 00:14:07,078
Anyway, so, uh, you're a lawyer?
334
00:14:07,227 --> 00:14:08,775
Yep. I am.
335
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:10,005
What was law school like?
336
00:14:10,378 --> 00:14:11,511
Pretty challenging.
337
00:14:11,536 --> 00:14:12,805
Yeah, I've heard that.
338
00:14:12,806 --> 00:14:13,932
What was the toughest part?
339
00:14:13,957 --> 00:14:15,183
The tests.
340
00:14:16,003 --> 00:14:17,369
I don't like tests.
341
00:14:17,394 --> 00:14:20,162
Well, luckily, this is
not one of those tests.
342
00:14:20,459 --> 00:14:22,080
It's just a get-to-know-you.
343
00:14:22,539 --> 00:14:23,909
- Hmm.
- Great.
344
00:14:24,466 --> 00:14:27,142
Then I'll...
ask the next question.
345
00:14:28,552 --> 00:14:29,604
How am I doing?
346
00:14:29,835 --> 00:14:30,716
Good.
347
00:14:31,350 --> 00:14:32,674
- Good?
- So good.
348
00:14:37,548 --> 00:14:38,738
Okay.
349
00:14:43,106 --> 00:14:44,579
Shall we maybe grab the waiter,
350
00:14:44,604 --> 00:14:46,270
- order some drinks?
- Yeah, yeah.
351
00:14:46,295 --> 00:14:48,207
I think so. Excuse me.
352
00:14:50,643 --> 00:14:52,029
So, that...
353
00:14:53,679 --> 00:14:55,779
you wouldn't do in
front of the kids.
354
00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:57,625
Come on.
355
00:14:58,252 --> 00:14:59,227
Clearly.
356
00:14:59,544 --> 00:15:01,902
Okay, great. Let's order
a bottle of pinot noir.
357
00:15:01,927 --> 00:15:04,518
I recently read that
the antioxidants in red wine
358
00:15:04,543 --> 00:15:06,417
help prevent
coronary artery disease.
359
00:15:06,442 --> 00:15:08,707
Wow, Jane, you're a...
real bulldozer.
360
00:15:08,732 --> 00:15:10,599
I'm not sure
if that's a good thing
361
00:15:10,624 --> 00:15:12,462
or a bad thing, but thanks.
362
00:15:12,669 --> 00:15:14,526
Pretty sure it's a bad thing.
363
00:15:15,300 --> 00:15:17,563
I'll have a glass of your best
364
00:15:17,588 --> 00:15:18,785
Speyside scotch.
365
00:15:19,260 --> 00:15:20,374
Nice choice.
366
00:15:20,469 --> 00:15:21,653
I'll have one as well.
367
00:15:22,438 --> 00:15:23,578
All around.
368
00:15:23,603 --> 00:15:25,412
No, thanks.
I'll have my usual white.
369
00:15:26,494 --> 00:15:28,670
Ever tried one of the
Japanese single malts?
370
00:15:28,832 --> 00:15:32,093
They're great. Although
for my money, got to go Scottish
371
00:15:32,118 --> 00:15:33,792
if you want a good
peaty single malt.
372
00:15:34,621 --> 00:15:35,654
Absolutely.
373
00:15:35,679 --> 00:15:38,413
- Have you had anything from Islay?
- It's my favorite.
374
00:15:38,438 --> 00:15:40,706
It's the first place I go
whenever I'm in Scotland.
375
00:15:40,794 --> 00:15:42,794
In Scotland. Of course.
376
00:15:42,819 --> 00:15:45,687
- Ever been?
- No, but it's on my list.
377
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,083
You'll have to tell me
where to go.
378
00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:50,541
Hey, good news...
I think she likes Rafael.
379
00:15:50,566 --> 00:15:52,010
I want to travel, too.
380
00:15:52,035 --> 00:15:54,245
I have a long list of places
I want to visit.
381
00:15:54,764 --> 00:15:55,981
Yeah.
382
00:15:56,183 --> 00:15:58,335
Less into the bulldozer.
383
00:16:02,213 --> 00:16:04,987
Okay. Well, I'm glad
we got to know her.
384
00:16:05,128 --> 00:16:06,828
- You were right, she's fine.
- Yeah.
385
00:16:07,427 --> 00:16:09,837
I mean, she clearly
didn't like me.
386
00:16:10,691 --> 00:16:11,775
That's not true.
387
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,290
- Yeah, so I didn't like other Jane.
- Fine.
388
00:16:14,331 --> 00:16:16,104
Maybe she wasn't giving
you the warmest vibe.
389
00:16:16,262 --> 00:16:17,188
Right?
390
00:16:17,213 --> 00:16:18,687
And I was really trying.
391
00:16:18,712 --> 00:16:20,279
She just tries too hard.
392
00:16:20,304 --> 00:16:22,172
She talked about
the most random things.
393
00:16:22,197 --> 00:16:23,836
I mean, what was I supposed
to talk about, anyway?
394
00:16:23,861 --> 00:16:25,861
Every single thing
was off-limits.
395
00:16:25,997 --> 00:16:28,398
And she didn't ask me
one question about myself.
396
00:16:28,502 --> 00:16:29,934
She asked so many questions.
397
00:16:30,167 --> 00:16:31,836
I felt like I was
on the witness stand.
398
00:16:31,861 --> 00:16:33,350
I was just trying
to get to know her.
399
00:16:33,375 --> 00:16:35,030
Just let it go.
400
00:16:35,203 --> 00:16:37,392
Petra's new girlfriend
doesn't have to like you.
401
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:38,398
Wow.
402
00:16:38,423 --> 00:16:40,491
I've never seen anyone
not like Jane before.
403
00:16:40,516 --> 00:16:42,129
It's honestly a turn-on.
404
00:16:42,626 --> 00:16:43,891
Well, I was underwhelmed.
405
00:16:43,916 --> 00:16:46,017
Well, now you see why
I had to call you J.R.
406
00:16:46,292 --> 00:16:48,728
I mean, we should call her JV.
407
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:51,594
Oh, that's perfect.
408
00:16:51,954 --> 00:16:54,488
Oh, Jane is so JV.
409
00:16:54,625 --> 00:16:56,847
I know. She's so basic.
410
00:16:57,086 --> 00:16:58,731
Okay, now you're just being mean.
411
00:16:58,922 --> 00:17:00,525
Let's go somewhere nicer.
412
00:17:01,383 --> 00:17:03,267
And it doesn't matter
if she doesn't like you,
413
00:17:03,820 --> 00:17:05,337
because I...
414
00:17:07,491 --> 00:17:08,707
love you.
415
00:17:17,744 --> 00:17:21,026
Well, we blew past
a pretty big moment earlier.
416
00:17:21,154 --> 00:17:23,288
And, uh, it was
a little anticlimactic.
417
00:17:23,313 --> 00:17:24,545
I'll say.
418
00:17:24,581 --> 00:17:26,041
In fact, I did.
419
00:17:26,066 --> 00:17:28,257
So I just wanted
to take a minute,
420
00:17:28,282 --> 00:17:31,383
slow down and commemorate this
421
00:17:31,408 --> 00:17:32,733
"I love you" milestone.
422
00:17:33,973 --> 00:17:35,439
By which, I mean have sex.
423
00:17:36,902 --> 00:17:38,149
Count me in.
424
00:17:42,862 --> 00:17:44,111
In contrast,
425
00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:46,644
that was very climactic.
426
00:17:47,115 --> 00:17:48,645
And inspiring.
427
00:17:48,872 --> 00:17:51,682
After all,
Jane is a romance writer.
428
00:17:51,952 --> 00:17:54,719
I'm gonna do some writing.
429
00:17:54,965 --> 00:17:56,095
Now?
430
00:17:56,120 --> 00:17:57,886
What can I say?
You're my muse.
431
00:17:58,014 --> 00:18:01,421
And I'm gonna strike
while the inspiration's hot.
432
00:18:07,502 --> 00:18:09,469
You were up pretty late.
Looks like somebody got
433
00:18:09,494 --> 00:18:10,782
her writing mojo back.
434
00:18:10,807 --> 00:18:12,377
Yep.
435
00:18:12,402 --> 00:18:14,787
Okay. I got to go.
436
00:18:14,812 --> 00:18:17,680
- Your drawer's overflowing.
- I know I was resistant to it at first,
437
00:18:17,705 --> 00:18:19,037
but it's really come in handy.
438
00:18:19,062 --> 00:18:20,384
Ah. Well, then,
maybe while you're gone,
439
00:18:20,418 --> 00:18:21,784
I'll clear out
a couple more for you.
440
00:18:21,939 --> 00:18:23,052
Maybe even a shelf.
441
00:18:23,077 --> 00:18:24,359
Don't go too crazy.
442
00:18:33,865 --> 00:18:35,865
Ooh, this must be what Jane wrote
443
00:18:35,890 --> 00:18:37,890
after their sexy time
last night.
444
00:18:39,203 --> 00:18:41,252
♪ ♪
445
00:18:44,119 --> 00:18:46,075
Aw, thanks for these.
446
00:18:46,100 --> 00:18:48,236
Yes. So nice
of you to come, Darci,
447
00:18:48,261 --> 00:18:50,311
but, uh, Xo was about
to take a nap.
448
00:18:50,336 --> 00:18:51,431
I understand.
449
00:18:51,559 --> 00:18:53,678
I have to go back to hunting
for a nanny, anyway.
450
00:18:53,703 --> 00:18:55,970
- Oh, you guys talked. I'm glad.
- Yes.
451
00:18:55,995 --> 00:18:57,650
I totally understand.
Given that...
452
00:18:57,675 --> 00:18:59,742
An-An-And, and these flowers...
453
00:18:59,776 --> 00:19:02,159
Oh, my God,
they're gorgeous, Darci.
454
00:19:02,184 --> 00:19:03,977
Truly. Thank you.
And we're walking.
455
00:19:04,002 --> 00:19:06,269
I told Ro you guys would
need time to find someone
456
00:19:06,294 --> 00:19:07,647
before the show starts.
457
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:09,669
What show?
458
00:19:09,694 --> 00:19:11,244
Rogelio didn't mention
459
00:19:11,464 --> 00:19:13,329
anything about a new show.
460
00:19:13,354 --> 00:19:14,754
He said he couldn't
be Baby's nanny
461
00:19:14,779 --> 00:19:16,211
because you have cancer.
462
00:19:17,100 --> 00:19:18,900
Well, i-it was
463
00:19:19,247 --> 00:19:23,173
a-a cancer/new show
combination, really.
464
00:19:23,198 --> 00:19:24,446
Wow.
465
00:19:25,470 --> 00:19:28,246
I knew you were
a self-absorbed meat bag.
466
00:19:28,807 --> 00:19:30,627
But using the cancer card?
467
00:19:30,650 --> 00:19:32,423
That is a new low, even for you.
468
00:19:32,448 --> 00:19:33,914
And you know who
will suffer? Baby.
469
00:19:34,317 --> 00:19:36,314
Because we lost Felicia,
470
00:19:36,408 --> 00:19:38,485
the best nanny out there,
due to you,
471
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:39,636
and your ego.
472
00:19:40,633 --> 00:19:41,650
Ugh.
473
00:19:41,675 --> 00:19:43,455
I just hate bowling,
that's why I canceled.
474
00:19:44,357 --> 00:19:46,407
We had a plan. Raf said
he confirmed with you.
475
00:19:46,432 --> 00:19:47,865
He did.
I just don't want to go.
476
00:19:47,928 --> 00:19:49,243
It's gross.
477
00:19:49,268 --> 00:19:51,274
The dirty shoes,
the dirty balls.
478
00:19:51,299 --> 00:19:53,462
Petra is so over balls.
479
00:19:53,496 --> 00:19:56,640
Look, I already told Mateo
about it, and he's so excited.
480
00:19:56,674 --> 00:19:58,441
Then take him. I'll do
something else with the girls.
481
00:19:58,466 --> 00:20:00,272
- But...
- Jane! I don't like bowling.
482
00:20:00,301 --> 00:20:01,667
You're not gonna
bulldoze me into this.
483
00:20:02,647 --> 00:20:03,867
Is this about J.R.?
484
00:20:03,892 --> 00:20:04,898
What? No.
485
00:20:04,954 --> 00:20:06,699
You said bulldoze,
she said bulldoze.
486
00:20:06,724 --> 00:20:08,024
Is that why you're saying no?
487
00:20:08,049 --> 00:20:09,153
Of course not.
488
00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:12,497
She doesn't like me, does she?
489
00:20:13,262 --> 00:20:14,798
She likes you fine.
490
00:20:15,826 --> 00:20:17,159
Okay, fine.
She doesn't like you.
491
00:20:17,479 --> 00:20:19,094
It was awkward
492
00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:21,279
because there were so
many topics off-limits.
493
00:20:21,283 --> 00:20:23,548
Look, don't worry about it.
You're just not her cup of tea.
494
00:20:24,199 --> 00:20:25,580
You should take
the afternoon off.
495
00:20:25,605 --> 00:20:28,170
I'm feeling good. I-I can handle
being alone for a while.
496
00:20:33,471 --> 00:20:35,844
Jane can empty my drains, and
Ro's bringing lunch by later.
497
00:20:35,869 --> 00:20:37,568
And, honestly,
I could use some space.
498
00:20:42,937 --> 00:20:43,939
Ma.
499
00:20:44,163 --> 00:20:45,663
I said I don't need any help.
500
00:20:45,688 --> 00:20:46,955
Why don't you go home for a bit?
501
00:20:48,402 --> 00:20:49,658
There is a need!
502
00:20:49,924 --> 00:20:52,791
You're smothering me and I need
some time without you!
503
00:21:09,307 --> 00:21:12,666
Mateo had a meltdown when
I told him that the girls
504
00:21:12,691 --> 00:21:14,190
aren't coming bowling.
505
00:21:14,604 --> 00:21:16,111
On a scale of one
506
00:21:16,136 --> 00:21:17,703
to decapitating
his Darth Vader doll?
507
00:21:17,728 --> 00:21:19,675
Oh, it was a dark day
for the Empire.
508
00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:21,752
Well, he sees the girls
all the time. He'll be fine.
509
00:21:21,777 --> 00:21:22,840
I know, but still.
510
00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:25,736
This is why I want J.R. to like
me. She's affecting our family.
511
00:21:25,761 --> 00:21:28,377
And we spent a long time
negotiating our parts.
512
00:21:29,501 --> 00:21:30,547
What's wrong?
513
00:21:31,709 --> 00:21:33,350
I was clearing out
some drawers for you,
514
00:21:33,543 --> 00:21:36,414
and I came across the story
you wrote last night.
515
00:21:38,072 --> 00:21:39,541
Oh. I...
516
00:21:40,759 --> 00:21:42,324
I didn't mean for
you to read that.
517
00:21:42,349 --> 00:21:43,583
I didn't plan to.
518
00:21:44,217 --> 00:21:45,912
But you said I inspired you,
519
00:21:46,288 --> 00:21:49,633
so I thought maybe it would be
about us, but it was...
520
00:21:50,041 --> 00:21:51,773
- About Michael.
- Yeah.
521
00:21:52,279 --> 00:21:54,425
And look, I hate that
it even bothers me this much,
522
00:21:54,450 --> 00:21:56,985
but you had just told me
that you loved me,
523
00:21:57,010 --> 00:21:59,236
and then you got out of bed,
and you wrote about him.
524
00:21:59,298 --> 00:22:00,770
It just made me feel like...
525
00:22:02,782 --> 00:22:03,889
Like what?
526
00:22:05,231 --> 00:22:07,064
You were choosing him
all over again.
527
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:08,807
- Oh.
- And I hate
528
00:22:08,832 --> 00:22:10,022
even saying that.
529
00:22:10,070 --> 00:22:11,783
Look, that's not what it was.
530
00:22:12,719 --> 00:22:15,007
I sat down to write,
and realized...
531
00:22:15,466 --> 00:22:17,726
yesterday was the anniversary
of Michael's death.
532
00:22:18,285 --> 00:22:19,962
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
533
00:22:19,987 --> 00:22:21,739
No. No, no, no, no. It's okay.
534
00:22:21,764 --> 00:22:23,765
No. I had no idea. I should have
never even read it.
535
00:22:23,852 --> 00:22:25,768
Oh. I...
536
00:22:27,121 --> 00:22:28,978
Hi, Abuela.
Everything okay?
537
00:22:29,172 --> 00:22:30,671
You kicked Abuela out?
538
00:22:30,798 --> 00:22:32,758
Look, I didn't want
to hurt her feelings,
539
00:22:32,783 --> 00:22:33,900
but I had to make her leave.
540
00:22:34,252 --> 00:22:35,316
Why?
541
00:22:46,828 --> 00:22:47,901
She failed?
542
00:22:47,965 --> 00:22:50,292
She told me that she was doing
well on her practice tests.
543
00:22:52,888 --> 00:22:55,330
You knew how soon the test was?
544
00:22:57,246 --> 00:22:58,759
She swore me to secrecy.
545
00:22:58,786 --> 00:23:00,319
She knew that if you knew,
546
00:23:00,344 --> 00:23:01,947
you wouldn't let her
help you recover.
547
00:23:01,972 --> 00:23:04,908
She's right.
She has to pass that test.
548
00:23:05,087 --> 00:23:06,792
I can't believe
you hid this from me.
549
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:08,658
I shouldn't have.
550
00:23:09,551 --> 00:23:10,690
And you shouldn't
have asked me to.
551
00:23:11,150 --> 00:23:12,618
A family meeting.
552
00:23:12,643 --> 00:23:14,764
Nice idea, Jane. Classic.
553
00:23:21,705 --> 00:23:23,705
I'm through surgery, Ma.
I'm fine.
554
00:23:25,322 --> 00:23:26,924
I am, I promise.
555
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:37,627
She is?
556
00:23:49,727 --> 00:23:51,994
I have been outside.
557
00:23:55,462 --> 00:23:57,042
Hey, Gary.
558
00:23:57,444 --> 00:23:58,818
Good to see you.
559
00:23:59,759 --> 00:24:01,213
I saw him looking at me
560
00:24:01,238 --> 00:24:02,771
like I was a sick person.
561
00:24:03,624 --> 00:24:04,711
And... I don't know.
562
00:24:04,736 --> 00:24:06,950
I-I just can't handle
being seen like that.
563
00:24:06,975 --> 00:24:09,728
Especially when you're used
to being the whoop ass.
564
00:24:12,166 --> 00:24:15,763
No, I'm sorry
I didn't say anything sooner.
565
00:24:16,163 --> 00:24:19,127
Okay, bottom line?
566
00:24:19,331 --> 00:24:22,493
No more secrets,
much more communication.
567
00:24:22,518 --> 00:24:23,807
We have to work together.
568
00:24:23,832 --> 00:24:25,999
Ladies, let's get in formation.
569
00:24:26,093 --> 00:24:28,660
Abuela, I'm going to take charge
of test prep.
570
00:24:31,867 --> 00:24:33,558
- Deal.
- Okay.
571
00:24:33,583 --> 00:24:35,277
What about me?
Wha-What's my part?
572
00:24:35,302 --> 00:24:36,568
Recovering.
573
00:24:38,395 --> 00:24:39,694
And so, friends,
574
00:24:39,719 --> 00:24:41,180
they played their parts.
575
00:24:41,205 --> 00:24:42,571
How many congressmen are there
576
00:24:42,573 --> 00:24:43,748
in the House of Representatives,
Abuela?
577
00:24:43,773 --> 00:24:45,667
425?
578
00:24:45,862 --> 00:24:47,893
Close. 435.
579
00:24:50,768 --> 00:24:52,752
Who was the president
during the Great Depression?
580
00:24:52,777 --> 00:24:54,738
- Herbert Hoover.
- There were two.
581
00:24:54,763 --> 00:24:56,196
Hoover and FDR.
582
00:24:56,358 --> 00:24:58,337
Hoover and FDR.
583
00:25:00,323 --> 00:25:01,783
Hoover, FDR.
584
00:25:01,917 --> 00:25:03,383
Who has the right to veto bills?
585
00:25:03,572 --> 00:25:04,853
The president.
586
00:25:04,878 --> 00:25:07,134
Right. How old do you
have to be to vote?
587
00:25:07,159 --> 00:25:08,783
- 18.
- Right again.
588
00:25:09,048 --> 00:25:10,723
How many U.S.
senators are there?
589
00:25:10,748 --> 00:25:12,439
- 100.
- Correct.
590
00:25:12,703 --> 00:25:14,476
Is Puerto Rico
an American state?
591
00:25:14,706 --> 00:25:16,736
No, it is a commonwealth,
592
00:25:16,761 --> 00:25:19,603
an unincorporated territory.
593
00:25:22,504 --> 00:25:23,533
Preach!
594
00:25:24,970 --> 00:25:26,486
Maybe don't say that
last part at the exam,
595
00:25:26,511 --> 00:25:27,798
but that's right.
596
00:25:35,291 --> 00:25:36,762
It is important to note
597
00:25:36,787 --> 00:25:39,961
that while Rogelio thinks
he's being recognized for his celebrity,
598
00:25:40,264 --> 00:25:41,542
the truth is,
599
00:25:41,567 --> 00:25:44,164
no one likes a grown man
alone at a playground.
600
00:25:44,470 --> 00:25:45,649
Felicia?
601
00:25:50,275 --> 00:25:51,976
My name is Rogelio de la Vega.
602
00:25:52,121 --> 00:25:53,869
You interviewed
to be a nanny with...
603
00:25:53,894 --> 00:25:56,521
Oh. I have employment
with a lovely family.
604
00:25:56,967 --> 00:25:58,353
I'd be willing to up the ante.
605
00:25:58,378 --> 00:26:00,011
Shh! Look straight ahead.
606
00:26:00,036 --> 00:26:02,172
Take out your phone,
pretend to talk.
607
00:26:03,978 --> 00:26:06,025
Is this a poaching situation?
608
00:26:06,832 --> 00:26:08,274
Yes, it is.
609
00:26:08,299 --> 00:26:10,666
Ooh. Play date
with a dash of espionage.
610
00:26:10,828 --> 00:26:12,768
- I'm leaning in.
- How did you find me?
611
00:26:12,793 --> 00:26:14,396
Deep dive on Instagram.
612
00:26:14,582 --> 00:26:16,849
I'll match whatever your current
employer is paying you.
613
00:26:16,874 --> 00:26:18,939
- Stop talking.
- All right, I'll double it.
614
00:26:19,135 --> 00:26:21,220
You drive a hard bargain,
Felicia.
615
00:26:21,363 --> 00:26:22,478
Felicia?
616
00:26:23,259 --> 00:26:24,603
Mario Lopez!
617
00:26:24,628 --> 00:26:25,927
What's he doing here?
618
00:26:33,377 --> 00:26:36,512
Mario Lopez, you have
my sincerest apologies.
619
00:26:36,728 --> 00:26:38,150
I have the utmost respect
620
00:26:38,175 --> 00:26:40,275
for your entire body
of work... as an actor,
621
00:26:40,300 --> 00:26:41,433
as a host, and,
622
00:26:41,458 --> 00:26:43,610
well, your actual body,
623
00:26:43,635 --> 00:26:45,429
which is truly a work of art.
624
00:26:45,454 --> 00:26:47,854
- You're tellin' me.
- You were poaching.
625
00:26:48,001 --> 00:26:50,814
Everyone knows there's no
poaching on the playground.
626
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:55,773
I saw on Instagram
you love babies.
627
00:26:55,798 --> 00:26:58,400
Mine is six months old. His kids
are practically in college.
628
00:26:58,425 --> 00:26:59,828
They're four and six years old,
629
00:26:59,853 --> 00:27:01,581
and Felicia's already
bonded with them.
630
00:27:01,610 --> 00:27:03,727
Gia! Nico! Come here.
We're about to take her
631
00:27:03,752 --> 00:27:05,805
on a family vacation
with us to the Bahamas.
632
00:27:05,830 --> 00:27:08,080
I'll give you a week
in my Mazatlán time-share.
633
00:27:08,247 --> 00:27:10,346
You can stay in my guest house
for three months.
634
00:27:10,371 --> 00:27:12,004
I will lease you a car,
fully loaded.
635
00:27:12,029 --> 00:27:13,672
Quick. Tell Felicia
you love her.
636
00:27:13,697 --> 00:27:14,984
I love you, Felicia.
637
00:27:15,009 --> 00:27:16,441
I love you, Felicia.
638
00:27:16,466 --> 00:27:18,166
I love you, Felicia.
639
00:27:18,481 --> 00:27:20,962
See? Look at those faces.
640
00:27:23,654 --> 00:27:26,885
You can have a three-episode
arc in my new series
641
00:27:26,910 --> 00:27:28,893
starring River Fields.
642
00:27:32,022 --> 00:27:34,923
I'm sorry.
You know acting is my dream.
643
00:27:36,305 --> 00:27:37,610
Bye, Felicia.
644
00:27:38,494 --> 00:27:39,994
Later, Slater.
645
00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:42,114
When can you start?
646
00:27:42,139 --> 00:27:43,429
1920.
647
00:27:44,003 --> 00:27:46,007
That is the year women
got the right to vote.
648
00:27:46,032 --> 00:27:47,586
Work it, Abuela! Oh!
649
00:27:47,611 --> 00:27:49,999
That's ten out of ten.
You're gonna kill this test.
650
00:27:52,190 --> 00:27:54,153
Okay, I'll meet you
at Mom's house after work.
651
00:28:03,413 --> 00:28:05,083
Thanks for holding the door.
652
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:07,914
So, how are you?
653
00:28:08,839 --> 00:28:10,078
Fine.
654
00:28:12,888 --> 00:28:15,016
You know, I saw that
you were reading
655
00:28:15,041 --> 00:28:16,741
What Happened in the Alley
the other day.
656
00:28:16,766 --> 00:28:18,365
- How?
- Sorry?
657
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,923
- How did you see?
- I noticed it in your bag.
658
00:28:21,948 --> 00:28:23,928
Yeah, that's a little stalkerish.
659
00:28:23,953 --> 00:28:25,486
It was sticking out.
660
00:28:25,904 --> 00:28:28,458
Uh, anyway, I love that book.
661
00:28:28,483 --> 00:28:31,585
Not a fan. I have a client who's
accusing the author of slander.
662
00:28:31,648 --> 00:28:34,215
Oh. That's... too bad.
663
00:28:34,752 --> 00:28:36,408
How long is this ride?
664
00:28:36,433 --> 00:28:38,700
Is she really not
at her floor yet?
665
00:28:38,875 --> 00:28:42,410
So, listen, I don't know if we
got off on the wrong foot.
666
00:28:43,549 --> 00:28:46,250
No, it's cool.
I don't have a problem with you.
667
00:28:49,075 --> 00:28:50,416
Right.
668
00:28:50,656 --> 00:28:53,767
But beyond not having
a problem with me,
669
00:28:54,023 --> 00:28:55,666
I'd love us to get along.
670
00:28:55,691 --> 00:28:57,485
- How come?
- How come?
671
00:28:57,894 --> 00:28:59,961
Because you're really
important to Petra.
672
00:28:59,986 --> 00:29:02,151
Oh, thank God!
673
00:29:02,176 --> 00:29:03,805
Anyway, I tried.
674
00:29:08,838 --> 00:29:10,605
You cornered J.R.
in an elevator
675
00:29:10,630 --> 00:29:12,455
and said she's really
important to me?
676
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:14,914
- I didn't say that exactly.
- Actually verbatim.
677
00:29:14,939 --> 00:29:15,822
Jane!
678
00:29:15,847 --> 00:29:18,880
I'm sorry, but it's true, and I
just wanted to connect with her.
679
00:29:18,905 --> 00:29:21,474
Just get over it! Everyone's
not going to love you.
680
00:29:21,502 --> 00:29:23,169
- That is not what this is about.
- Then what is it about?
681
00:29:23,171 --> 00:29:25,225
- You, okay?!
- It's about you,
682
00:29:25,250 --> 00:29:26,565
because I love you.
683
00:29:28,061 --> 00:29:30,820
And I just feel like J.R. is
poisoning the well against me,
684
00:29:31,247 --> 00:29:33,323
and I don't want anything to
come in the way of our family,
685
00:29:33,348 --> 00:29:36,267
because we've worked too hard,
and like I said,
686
00:29:37,964 --> 00:29:39,089
I love you.
687
00:29:40,688 --> 00:29:42,018
Well, thank you.
688
00:29:42,417 --> 00:29:44,500
I appreciate your explanation.
689
00:29:45,100 --> 00:29:46,617
- You have to say it back.
- I don't want to.
690
00:29:46,642 --> 00:29:47,697
Petra.
691
00:29:48,353 --> 00:29:49,360
Can I say it in Czech?
692
00:29:49,385 --> 00:29:52,056
- No. I want it in English right now.
- Fine!
693
00:29:53,659 --> 00:29:54,653
I love you, too.
694
00:30:02,102 --> 00:30:03,858
Just don't cry
in front of J.R.
695
00:30:04,181 --> 00:30:05,312
Ever.
696
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:12,790
She got a way bigger
"I love you" than me.
697
00:30:14,669 --> 00:30:16,045
I'm really sorry.
698
00:30:16,465 --> 00:30:19,048
I shouldn't have said what I
said about you choosing Michael.
699
00:30:20,312 --> 00:30:23,012
But if you feel that way,
we should talk about it.
700
00:30:24,419 --> 00:30:27,603
I guess I'm still
insecure about it.
701
00:30:28,780 --> 00:30:30,994
I can't help but wonder
if I'm a second choice,
702
00:30:31,127 --> 00:30:33,714
which is impossible
to answer, I know.
703
00:30:33,739 --> 00:30:35,720
Yeah, it is.
704
00:30:38,180 --> 00:30:39,831
I don't know
if this helps or not,
705
00:30:39,856 --> 00:30:42,844
but this is the first year that
I forgot about the anniversary
706
00:30:42,869 --> 00:30:46,112
of Michael's death,
and that's because of you.
707
00:31:04,859 --> 00:31:07,780
And with Xo and Jane's words
ringing in her ears,
708
00:31:07,805 --> 00:31:10,202
Alba decided to go for it.
709
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:48,697
I know.
710
00:31:48,761 --> 00:31:52,188
Not quite the telenovela ending
Alba was hoping for.
711
00:31:52,490 --> 00:31:54,156
♪ CHIVALROUS MUSIC ♪
712
00:32:11,389 --> 00:32:12,621
And cut!
713
00:32:19,609 --> 00:32:21,742
That was great!
714
00:32:21,876 --> 00:32:23,062
For you, no?
715
00:32:23,087 --> 00:32:24,688
Almost believable.
716
00:32:24,931 --> 00:32:27,595
Where's Darci?
I have wonderful news.
717
00:32:27,620 --> 00:32:31,303
I have secured
Felicia's services
718
00:32:31,372 --> 00:32:32,685
as a nanny.
719
00:32:32,710 --> 00:32:34,343
But we put a great nanny on hold
720
00:32:34,368 --> 00:32:36,506
a few weeks ago when we heard
your show was getting made.
721
00:32:36,744 --> 00:32:39,888
Wait, Darci never mentioned that.
722
00:32:39,913 --> 00:32:41,772
You knew about my show?
723
00:32:43,217 --> 00:32:44,232
Yeah.
724
00:32:44,447 --> 00:32:46,035
But you pulled the cancer card.
725
00:32:46,060 --> 00:32:47,676
- Because you were...
- I went to great lengths to poach
726
00:32:47,678 --> 00:32:50,011
- Felicia in a war with Mario Lopez!
- too much of a coward to tell the truth!
727
00:32:50,013 --> 00:32:51,847
- That bridge cannot be unburned!
- I wanted you to sit in your mess
728
00:32:51,872 --> 00:32:54,290
- I will never be a guest on Extra!
- for a while!
729
00:32:54,315 --> 00:32:55,315
Stop!
730
00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:57,368
Enough.
731
00:32:58,889 --> 00:33:00,823
You used your wife's cancer
732
00:33:00,848 --> 00:33:02,130
to avoid telling Darci the truth
733
00:33:02,155 --> 00:33:04,307
about not being able
to watch Baby?
734
00:33:05,525 --> 00:33:07,792
And you made him
feel like there was
735
00:33:07,817 --> 00:33:10,624
a crisis only you could fix
just to teach him a lesson?
736
00:33:10,753 --> 00:33:13,154
Thanks for that.
Even I was getting confused.
737
00:33:13,236 --> 00:33:14,536
You are both wrong.
738
00:33:15,102 --> 00:33:17,729
Mush, whose side are you on?
739
00:33:19,328 --> 00:33:21,136
I'm on Baby's side.
740
00:33:24,757 --> 00:33:26,089
What's wrong?
741
00:33:32,942 --> 00:33:35,876
- Abuela.
- Ma, I'm so sorry.
742
00:33:40,583 --> 00:33:42,073
You just will.
743
00:33:43,713 --> 00:33:45,997
Abuela, come on. I'm gonna
give you the same speech
744
00:33:46,022 --> 00:33:47,398
you've always given us:
745
00:33:47,423 --> 00:33:50,351
don't throw away your future
over some boy.
746
00:33:50,878 --> 00:33:51,892
Agreed.
747
00:33:51,894 --> 00:33:53,638
- Now, help me up.
- Whoa.
748
00:33:53,663 --> 00:33:55,840
What? I'm coming.
749
00:33:55,865 --> 00:33:58,242
You need to be in a good mood
to take that test.
750
00:33:58,802 --> 00:34:00,112
And seeing me out of the house
751
00:34:00,137 --> 00:34:01,471
is gonna put you
in a good mood, right?
752
00:34:03,409 --> 00:34:04,482
All right?
753
00:34:04,507 --> 00:34:05,783
So let's go.
754
00:34:05,808 --> 00:34:07,268
Which brings us here...
755
00:34:07,841 --> 00:34:10,025
- I can't believe that traffic.
- Go, go! Run!
756
00:34:16,190 --> 00:34:18,291
What do you mean? Please?
757
00:34:18,463 --> 00:34:20,387
Doors are closed.
She's two minutes late.
758
00:34:20,412 --> 00:34:22,846
Sir. Please.
759
00:34:23,287 --> 00:34:25,745
Please. My grandma's
worked so hard for this.
760
00:34:25,770 --> 00:34:27,236
It means everything to her.
761
00:34:27,261 --> 00:34:29,167
- I'm sorry.
- You're sorry?
762
00:34:29,192 --> 00:34:31,620
Phew. We could
really use our whoop ass.
763
00:34:31,645 --> 00:34:33,479
My mom is late because of me.
764
00:34:33,504 --> 00:34:34,570
The reason doesn't matter.
765
00:34:34,595 --> 00:34:36,161
Oh, yeah, it does.
766
00:34:36,742 --> 00:34:38,955
Because I have cancer. No, no,
767
00:34:38,980 --> 00:34:40,288
do not look away.
768
00:34:40,733 --> 00:34:42,517
I have tubes coming out of me
769
00:34:42,542 --> 00:34:44,110
and pus dripping in these bags
770
00:34:44,135 --> 00:34:45,745
and it hurts like hell!
771
00:34:45,770 --> 00:34:47,770
But I came here to see my mom
772
00:34:47,795 --> 00:34:50,040
take this damn test,
because being
773
00:34:50,065 --> 00:34:52,307
a citizen of this country
is important to her!
774
00:34:52,332 --> 00:34:54,237
So I am gonna need you
775
00:34:54,262 --> 00:34:56,836
to let her take
that freaking test.
776
00:34:56,861 --> 00:34:58,227
Well, if there was ever
777
00:34:58,252 --> 00:35:00,160
a moment to play
the cancer card,
778
00:35:00,255 --> 00:35:02,240
this was it.
779
00:35:05,533 --> 00:35:07,433
Go, go.
780
00:35:08,169 --> 00:35:09,474
Oh, Mom.
781
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:13,425
Thank you.
782
00:35:16,596 --> 00:35:19,284
Who was the U.S. president
during World War I?
783
00:35:19,312 --> 00:35:20,948
Woodrow Wilson.
784
00:35:22,651 --> 00:35:24,833
What year
was the Constitution written?
785
00:35:24,858 --> 00:35:27,307
1787.
786
00:35:28,747 --> 00:35:31,624
How many voting members are
in the House of Representatives?
787
00:35:31,948 --> 00:35:34,336
435.
788
00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:37,687
Who rode with George Washington
when he crossed the Delaware?
789
00:35:37,985 --> 00:35:40,771
Wait, that wasn't one
of the practice questions.
790
00:35:41,298 --> 00:35:42,931
I don't know.
791
00:35:43,424 --> 00:35:44,814
I don't know either.
792
00:35:44,957 --> 00:35:46,709
I just had to see
if I could stump you.
793
00:36:00,739 --> 00:36:03,840
♪ ♪
794
00:36:34,033 --> 00:36:35,841
Esteban is watching Baby.
795
00:36:36,416 --> 00:36:38,807
He said he'll stay with her
for as long as it takes for us
796
00:36:38,832 --> 00:36:41,745
to have a mature conversation.
797
00:36:42,067 --> 00:36:43,528
Xo said the same thing.
798
00:36:43,605 --> 00:36:44,682
So...
799
00:36:45,776 --> 00:36:47,548
what's the mature explanation
800
00:36:47,573 --> 00:36:49,760
for your incredibly
immature lie?
801
00:36:49,998 --> 00:36:51,303
Sorry.
802
00:36:52,466 --> 00:36:53,971
Let me revise that.
803
00:36:56,125 --> 00:36:59,027
Please tell me
your point of view
804
00:36:59,328 --> 00:37:01,018
on this situation.
805
00:37:01,525 --> 00:37:02,998
As you may recall,
806
00:37:03,332 --> 00:37:05,832
there was a bit of
pomp and circumstance
807
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,193
around my decision to
be a stay-at-home dad.
808
00:37:08,283 --> 00:37:11,239
I'll be happy to be Baby's nanny
on Darci's days.
809
00:37:11,264 --> 00:37:13,974
No way, Rogelio.
You'll do it for a few days
810
00:37:13,999 --> 00:37:15,440
and then get bored
and flake out.
811
00:37:15,465 --> 00:37:17,566
I won't flake.
I'm 100% committed.
812
00:37:18,037 --> 00:37:20,651
I couldn't bring myself to
admit that you were right.
813
00:37:21,368 --> 00:37:22,674
That I got bored.
814
00:37:23,344 --> 00:37:24,975
Especially since you love
815
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:26,882
spending your free
time with Baby.
816
00:37:27,089 --> 00:37:29,256
And you do the hard part.
817
00:37:29,281 --> 00:37:30,323
All the nursing...
818
00:37:30,348 --> 00:37:31,518
I stopped breastfeeding.
819
00:37:32,964 --> 00:37:34,408
But you've been
bringing breast milk
820
00:37:34,433 --> 00:37:35,674
to our house every week.
821
00:37:35,699 --> 00:37:36,683
It's formula.
822
00:37:37,832 --> 00:37:39,627
I just got so tired of pumping.
823
00:37:40,666 --> 00:37:42,565
And I didn't want to admit
any weakness to you
824
00:37:42,590 --> 00:37:44,623
because I thought
you'd use it against me.
825
00:37:44,922 --> 00:37:46,708
I probably would have.
826
00:37:46,767 --> 00:37:48,245
Well, I've been using
your weaknesses
827
00:37:48,270 --> 00:37:50,836
against you,
so that makes sense.
828
00:37:52,143 --> 00:37:54,655
Okay, no more
weaponizing weakness.
829
00:37:54,813 --> 00:37:57,780
Agreed. And to prove
that I mean that,
830
00:37:57,805 --> 00:37:59,968
I'm going to tell
some other weaknesses.
831
00:38:02,533 --> 00:38:03,508
I...
832
00:38:04,783 --> 00:38:07,637
very occasionally...
833
00:38:08,412 --> 00:38:09,461
get...
834
00:38:10,303 --> 00:38:11,560
Botox.
835
00:38:11,586 --> 00:38:12,451
I know.
836
00:38:13,059 --> 00:38:14,158
And it looks
837
00:38:14,660 --> 00:38:16,094
like you're probably due
838
00:38:16,119 --> 00:38:18,327
for some touch-up fillers, too.
839
00:38:18,944 --> 00:38:20,808
Okay, my turn.
840
00:38:22,277 --> 00:38:23,739
I think...
841
00:38:24,666 --> 00:38:28,291
the real reason I hide things
from you is because...
842
00:38:30,965 --> 00:38:33,207
deep down,
I want you to like me.
843
00:38:36,839 --> 00:38:39,285
Deep down, I want
you to like me, too.
844
00:38:40,701 --> 00:38:42,432
Well, deep down,
845
00:38:43,559 --> 00:38:44,869
I do like you.
846
00:38:46,137 --> 00:38:47,837
And deep...
847
00:38:49,048 --> 00:38:50,444
deep...
848
00:38:51,064 --> 00:38:53,610
deep down,
849
00:38:54,271 --> 00:38:55,937
I like you, too.
850
00:38:56,369 --> 00:38:59,806
And not so deep down,
Jane likes me a lot.
851
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:02,482
She... loves me, even.
852
00:39:03,604 --> 00:39:06,067
Anyway, so that's why
she came on so strong.
853
00:39:06,498 --> 00:39:08,515
And I'm really sorry
she freaked you out.
854
00:39:08,540 --> 00:39:09,838
You know what freaked me out?
855
00:39:10,134 --> 00:39:12,192
That she knew how
you felt about me
856
00:39:12,532 --> 00:39:14,353
and I didn't.
857
00:39:15,989 --> 00:39:17,649
I didn't want to scare you away.
858
00:39:17,674 --> 00:39:19,776
I get scared when you're
not straightforward.
859
00:39:19,801 --> 00:39:21,037
Well, it's hard.
860
00:39:21,150 --> 00:39:22,883
Well, you already seem
to have one foot out.
861
00:39:22,908 --> 00:39:24,575
I mean, you didn't want
to get to know my kids.
862
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:26,071
Because I don't like kids.
863
00:39:26,096 --> 00:39:28,555
So I wanted to know
we were serious
864
00:39:28,580 --> 00:39:30,111
before getting into all that.
865
00:39:31,071 --> 00:39:33,484
Well, just so you know,
I don't like kids either.
866
00:39:33,509 --> 00:39:35,583
No, but mine aren't normal kids.
867
00:39:35,608 --> 00:39:36,894
They're like...
868
00:39:37,101 --> 00:39:38,501
miniature adults.
869
00:39:38,875 --> 00:39:42,301
Then I'd love to
officially meet them.
870
00:39:43,553 --> 00:39:45,150
When we're serious.
871
00:39:46,791 --> 00:39:48,114
Okay.
872
00:39:48,301 --> 00:39:49,528
Fine.
873
00:39:52,502 --> 00:39:54,396
I want to be serious with you.
874
00:39:55,362 --> 00:39:57,442
I knew you'd say it first.
875
00:39:58,081 --> 00:40:00,361
And speaking of getting serious...
876
00:40:00,386 --> 00:40:01,857
It's for you.
877
00:40:02,445 --> 00:40:04,531
I realized three
drawers aren't enough.
878
00:40:04,556 --> 00:40:06,489
What you really need is a desk
so you can write
879
00:40:06,514 --> 00:40:08,848
about whatever it is
you need to write about.
880
00:40:08,873 --> 00:40:11,307
Which I promise I won't read.
881
00:40:11,564 --> 00:40:12,947
Oh, I don't know.
882
00:40:12,999 --> 00:40:15,533
Don't you think it makes it look
a little cramped in here?
883
00:40:16,715 --> 00:40:19,535
So, maybe we should get
a bigger place.
884
00:40:20,504 --> 00:40:21,673
Together.
885
00:40:22,346 --> 00:40:23,582
Really?
886
00:40:24,072 --> 00:40:25,440
Really.
887
00:40:26,728 --> 00:40:29,170
I think it's time I move in
with the man I love.
888
00:40:30,197 --> 00:40:31,981
Ah, yes.
889
00:40:32,228 --> 00:40:35,329
That's the sweeping romantic
climax I was looking for.
890
00:40:35,394 --> 00:40:37,766
They're taking the next step!
891
00:40:38,562 --> 00:40:41,063
And so are they.
Dinner with the girls.
892
00:40:45,476 --> 00:40:46,835
It's the D.A.'s office.
893
00:40:46,860 --> 00:40:48,408
This must be the official call
894
00:40:48,433 --> 00:40:50,301
that they've dropped
the charges.
895
00:40:52,125 --> 00:40:53,263
Hello?
896
00:40:55,888 --> 00:40:57,197
I see.
897
00:40:58,848 --> 00:41:00,821
Well, let me discuss
this with my client.
898
00:41:01,345 --> 00:41:03,756
They have a new eyewitness
claiming to have been in the room
899
00:41:03,781 --> 00:41:05,181
the night of Anezka's death.
900
00:41:06,243 --> 00:41:07,322
What?
901
00:41:08,347 --> 00:41:10,001
That's absurd. Who?
902
00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:11,742
I saw the whole thing.
903
00:41:11,767 --> 00:41:14,627
Ah, yes,
the one-eyed eyewitness.
904
00:41:14,652 --> 00:41:16,737
And it was not self-defense.
905
00:41:16,858 --> 00:41:20,807
Petra killed Anezka
in cold blood.
906
00:41:21,025 --> 00:41:24,793
Well, that's a different
kind of climax.
907
00:41:31,915 --> 00:41:34,595
Sync and correction by LittleDuck
www.addic7ed.com
63965
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