Original subtitles

You can clap if you want.

No, actually, I'm not kidding.

Oh, man.

We're just clapping.

All right.

Welcome to another episode of a fucking podcast with me, your host, Shannell.

And we got Kay Lovely, Clark Kent.

This is a very special episode because it's Easter Sunday.

Oh, I thought you were going to say it because we fucked.

We did fuck.

Yeah.

That also makes it special.

So, Easter, what are your old's plans?

Hmm.

I've had a little Easter picnic today with some porn friends, so that's going to be fun.

So you were telling me about this earlier and you were telling me about all the people

who are going.

And I noticed my name wasn't on the list.

But did you DM me on Twitter when you see me tweeted out who wants to come?

No.

I don't follow your Twitter all the time.

I get a lot of heart feelings.

What do you mean?

When I see you on Twitter, you're always thinking these other guys, only sometimes

it's me.

Well, that is a mutual thing.

I miss you too.

But so it wasn't a conscious thing to not invite me.

It wasn't because your feelings are so strong.

Do you want to come?

Please come.

I have to work.

I'm doing hot things.

Okay, well then fuck you.

That's why I invited you here to celebrate Easter with me.

Oh, well, yeah.

Well, on the Lord's Day, we have sex in this house.

That's true.

Yeah.

It's very true.

It's not only a Sunday, but it's also a Sunday Easter.

So, Clark.

You're from Great Britain.

You're obviously representing the knights.

Is this a traditional garb for Easter?

Did you guys like slay bunnies?

What is the tradition in Great Britain, that's not about Easter?

Has everybody dressed as knights and just run around with swords?

Yeah, we all dressed like this like Monty Python.

Yeah.

You call it a Monty Python?

We say it's Python.

It's called Monty Python.

That's how you talk, right?

But yeah, my mom said to me, you're shooting today.

It's Easter Sunday.

I was like, yeah.

10 a.m.

Sunday service.

Your mom knows she's welcome.

I spoke to her.

You usually talk to her before she was.

We're driving in the car.

Yeah, I call her.

My mom would get me hyped up for scenes too.

Yeah.

So not only...

I love it.

Is it Easter?

Yeah.

My birthday's coming up.

I know.

That's what we're really celebrating.

What do you have plans for celebrating my birthday?

Clark, or what are you guys doing?

I have plans.

What are you gonna do?

Well, I didn't bring you a little birthday gift today.

You did?

And yeah, maybe I'll come sneak on over after my shoe on your birthday.

You're having sex with somebody else on my birthday?

I'm having sex with six other men on your birthday because it's a gang bang.

Six other men.

That's not how I would have chosen to celebrate my birthday.

Let me just give you my help.

Could I...

Again, you have this history of having these parties and then I don't get invited.

This is a singular party.

I've never had one.

It was a six person gang bang and you didn't think...

I didn't even make the list of the top six super visitors.

Razzart.

I didn't get to choose.

You know what I want to be a birthday present right now?

I would love to.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Merry every day.

That's what I...

I'm going to go home there.

Easter, bro.

I also want to say...

Kay was at a gang bang that I was behind the scenes for and she brought little gift bags

for everybody because it was her first...

Not a gang bang.

A norgy.

A norgy.

My first...

Her first orgy.

I think this is the same kind of bags too.

Oh, right.

You just have a lot of these.

I do.

So that's for you.

Whenever I'm not here with you, you can just...

I can just...

I can just...

And think of me.

I might be licking this during your same just kind of...

Oh, hi.

I'm probably going to go into...

Because you'll...

I'm just going to close with that.

You're going to get close.

What do you want us to get close?

Mmm.

It smells like you too.

Aww.

That's not good.

Like peaches and cream.

Oh, that's cute.

This actually is something...

Do you have this?

I don't.

I have a lot of mantongs.

I believe I've just had one.

Yeah.

But a tuxedo mantong, you do not have.

Does it have tails too?

Ooh, I have no clue.

Open it up.

I'm not very sure.

I should have bought you one, huh?

It's going to fucking match.

Go on dress right now.

Go get naked.

Put this on right now.

I might.

Don't tip this.

Please.

It doesn't have tails.

That's so cool.

That's so cool.

That's not good.

That's not good.

It's a good thing.

It could be so easy to just make it with the front pad.

But they went to the effort.

This does sound a little...

That's what it makes.

This is small.

It seems wide in the nails makes it funny.

No.

You do know me.

This is like a very personalized gift.

Yeah, right?

Funny.

Not every guy, not every girl would know.

I would 100% wear this.

I would like...

I would host a party just so I have a chance to wear this.

Yes.

I love it.

And you go to the car?

Should I read the car?

Yes.

Yes.

Shout out.

I think I go east to egg.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Can you?

You want to know?

How do you get me one already?

No, I'll give you another one though.

I want you five.

We'll open it.

Yeah, yeah.

Where did you hide these strings?

Oh.

Well, last year they were making a scene.

It's quite honest with you.

Really?

Yeah.

I used them in a girl girl where we tried to get them pushed out of a pussy but it was

hard because they kept on snapping in half.

Yeah.

So they didn't open...

Yeah, these same eggs that you gave us.

Wow.

You put in somebody's pussy.

Well, just like...

And then you repackaged them.

Just the pink ones.

Where have these been?

I'm glad I picked the purple one.

I picked the purple one.

It might not be that big one but we did use two pink ones and I don't think I threw them

away.

It's okay.

Everything is gonna go by the smell and taste.

I'm tested.

Don't eat the eggs.

Open that card up.

So, my birthday card says thank you.

Which is an odd start to thank you for...

Thanks for being my friend.

Oh.

Eat like...

Dear Sean, thank you so much for letting me be a part of your life.

You're the most kind and lighthearted man I've ever met and I'm so grateful to have met.

I absolutely have the absolute best birthdays.

I just felt wrong.

I'm sorry.

So much love.

Always.

P.S.

You have a perfect penis.

I don't know if that part was on there but yeah.

It was.

And she even drew a picture of my perfect penis.

This is me.

That's her sesame.

Sadly, this picture doesn't quite do you justice.

What do you think?

I'm gonna put this on my fridge.

Let's get aside by second comparison.

Are we thinking it's like...

It's a pretty good story.

It's...

I have hair.

This is going on my fridge.

This is for memories.

Thank you.

This is actually really sweet.

You're welcome.

I hope you enjoy it.

I will enjoy it.

You're pussy or...

Well, everything.

Yeah, at all.

Also, I'll just start kicking off the Easter as well.

I just want people to see this.

So for Easter today, I came into set and I gave everybody a little Easter egg.

Okay, take a few seconds and guess to yourself what's in the Easter eggs?

Okay, have you guessed?

Okay.

Are you back?

We're back now.

We're back.

Hold the video.

We got a quarter commercial breaks here.

There's nobody sponsoring us, although maybe one of these are sponsors.

Well, Slipper has a sponsor with me, actually.

Oh, really?

Yeah, so in my little Easter egg, this is a little tricky guy.

And this is for you, Clark.

Oh, wow.

That's for me.

A little slip-and-loop for you, so we can have some sex today.

Slipper.

Now, this wasn't one that was inside your vagina.

Definitely not.

That seems...

That was fucked up in there.

We got stuck.

I love the original thing.

No, it's like one of these ones.

I mean, like I said, there's only two of them.

This is like a really different kind of Easter egg.

We're not trying to find where the Easter eggs are.

We're trying to find out where they've been.

Mmm, dirty places.

Okay, so speaking of Easter, talking about the...

Speaking of Easter...

Speaking of Easter...

He's risen.

The separation of church and porn.

Do you guys think that there should be more religion in porn?

Or less?

Oh, well, that's very controversial.

Because, I mean, there was the whole, like...

Like, there was the Mormon one that came out and a lot of people were upset.

And then there used to be the ones where there was sex and the Confessionals.

Like, in one of the teams team buildings.

I don't know if mom to say companies, but they have a building.

That's right.

And it's like a huge studio.

And they used to have, like, gay porn Confessionals in there.

But they said that they got too much backlash that they stopped.

Interesting.

You got Hallelujah there.

That's kind of the...

I know.

Well, I went to a Baptist University.

Wow.

So I was just...

But people do say, like, oh God, a lot in porn.

Yeah.

Because there is God in porn.

Oh my God.

And getting dick is heavenly.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It just makes sense, I feel like.

Mmm.

Mmm.

What?

So, speaking of Confessionals, this is kind of, like, a confessional in a sense.

I'm similar to a priest.

Do you have anything you want to tell me?

Like, any secrets?

Like, anything you want to get off your chest that you've just been dying to?

Um...

You'll have to chest.

But the last chest.

Um, that's really hard to talk with the living professor.

I thought I was going to eat easier than that.

I could do, like, snacks I think easily.

I think it's a little bit easier than that.

I think it's a little bit harder.

I think it's a little bit harder.

Well, um, oh, I do want to get something in my chest.

Sure.

Parachute.

That's what this podcast is about.

Um...

I'm sorry.

It's tickling me.

Oh, gosh.

I just wanted to say, um, I'm sorry God on Easter for putting God's pussy on a pair of shorts.

I got it.

But it's beach.

Because that was probably very sinful.

I don't think you're forgiven.

I don't know if I can give you absolution for that, but we appreciate the confession.

A lot of times I think how could God not have blessed me to be in porn with titties this

nice?

I think he wanted it to happen.

Yeah.

So more.

We want more God important.

More God important.

I don't know.

What was the first question?

It doesn't matter.

We'll just go to a new question.

So in preparing for this podcast, you did something unusual.

Uh, you took a shower this morning.

Um, why, what was, what kind of drove you for that?

You just wanted to make it extra special.

Well, I usually shower before.

No, I usually shower before.

You do?

Yeah.

That's great.

Can you notice that she smelled clean?

It's nice.

It's nice.

It's nice.

There should be more showers in porn though.

It's not a place to go.

I always shower before a scene.

Like in Europe, that's what we do.

Like when we get there, you shower when you're there.

I mean, yeah.

At the location.

Whereas most guys don't.

They're kind of like, oh, I had to shower at home.

Yeah.

But in Europe, you kind of like, you're ushered into the shower.

Yeah.

I get it.

I like that.

Maybe it's all the only thing is like with like the, um, with the hair and the makeup.

Sometimes it gets messed up in the water.

Oh, this is true.

I think you got somebody like, Sponge Iceman.

But in general, I think we've come to the conclusion.

More garden porn.

More showers in porn.

Both needed.

Clark, you used to live in your car.

How did you shower before scenes?

Would you just go up and get somebody's hose and kind of, you know, I would say hose.

Uh, I have done that when I was, you know, really having the water.

We'll jump in a river.

Okay.

Um, but most of us go into gym.

It'll flood you river.

Yeah.

I'll go 24 hour fitness.

You're insane.

Um, cold shower too.

I'll show it to you.

Always cold.

You like how I shaved?

You didn't do a good job.

You missed this bit.

Oh, well, fuck you.

That's my bush.

I see what you mean.

You shaved this.

This is, this is.

I shaved all my chest and everything.

I feel like the bush is bad.

Do that at the gym?

People like that shit.

Yeah.

Do you like bushes?

Are you a bush hater?

Uh, I know.

I know a bush hater.

I'm definitely a bush hater.

Yeah.

We're canceling Clark right now.

Her pussy just closes.

I like it.

I like it when it's so like a tiny little landing strip or something.

See, I can't fucking stand landing strips and I'll tell you why.

Or just nothing.

I just fucking hate it.

I'm like, why?

Like, have a fucking go for it or just take it all off.

Because a strip like that just doesn't make sense to me.

That's why I'm saying take it off.

Let's take it off.

I had it.

I'll tell you why I have a bush now.

It used to be fully shaved.

And when I first met US Wally Shaved actually.

And I've grown to realize the analytics do better with a bush.

Just because I don't know if people fucking like it.

Ever since I've had a bush as well, video ratings have gone up.

But you've also grown a popularity.

This is true.

There could be a correlation as opposed to conversations.

You know, you had to know is you got to know a bunch of people.

The only way to know is you got to whip it off.

Well, I did whip it off.

I did recently.

And then see what happens for like six months.

It was really long.

You're lucky, carp.

You're lucky it's the shark.

I had to go see where I pretended to like worship the bush.

I'm pulling on it.

I'm doing this with my lips.

Like, making it look like a...

Look at my teeth, but like my lips.

Like, I'm really into it.

And I'm like, what do I do?

So I'm having to tell me what to do.

Oh, you do like this?

You look at me.

And then you suck on it.

No.

But have you ever seen it look like I've enjoyed myself?

Have you ever seen like 70's porn where the bush goes like down the thigh?

That's a full bush.

Yeah.

I would never have seen that.

I would tell you all.

You're like no.

Okay, speaking of full bush moments.

Full bush moments.

Everybody look up my number one idol.

She sadly passed now.

Her name is Kay Parker.

She's one of the best porn stars.

She was in the business.

You named yourself after her, didn't you?

I did.

And well, my real name starts with the K.

So like, it was also a nickname.

But I guess, going into porn, looking stuff up and looking for names.

I did look up other K's and I found her and I was really inspired.

She actually did the first ever taboo porn.

Whoa.

I know.

Like a tent.

It's like the K.

It's like a chimic.

Okay, you can come around.

Yeah.

So we can see it.

Clark and I can have a whole conversation while we're on.

Yeah, we can talk about things.

Let me just say, Kay Parker did the first ever taboo porn and it's iconic.

And she went to court for it.

And that's why we can have taboo porn now today in this instance.

Thank you, Kay Parker.

Taboo porn is important.

Respect.

Yes.

Cool.

I'm a cape.

So Clark, hi.

You ran across America.

Yeah.

I just felt a lot running.

So when you were younger, you're watching Forrest Gump.

Yeah.

And you saw this guy with his learning disability who could cross America.

And that made you think, well, if he can do it, then I can do it.

My mom pointed that out.

She said Forrest Gump was a dummy.

You don't want to imitate this dumb guy.

And I was like, no, it's cool.

I like, I ran for three years, seven months or whatever.

He says 16 days.

Like, I just made me think, well, what happened if you ran for years?

Yeah.

And this.

It's got to fall eventually.

This.

You end up here.

Who are some of your other heroes with learning disabilities?

Good question.

Usually.

You're probably the main one.

Honestly, I'm operating at a really high level from where I started.

Like, you wouldn't even know that I had so much wrong.

How did you do at school?

Well, like in England, we do nine GCSEs.

And you get grades.

I got all A's and a couple of B's.

Maths and geography.

I have dyslexia.

So I scored A's and everything except spelling.

I couldn't.

I can't spell.

So that's your learning disability.

In reading, I read so much slower than everybody.

So yeah, I will be one of your heroes.

He's a hero to me because he shoots more.

But he doesn't know how to fucking read.

Yeah.

And I have these cue cards.

I don't know anything.

Honestly, they're just scribble.

They're just scribble.

I draw little pictures.

Look at them.

They're just so spelled.

Yeah.

Um.

So, Quirk, you look like a guy with an extensive criminal record.

What is a bug drive?

Can you tell us a little bit about that?

Um, you know, trying to think what criminal record.

You know what happened once was I was in a club.

It was a funny outfit night.

You know, we dressed up as fucking Superman.

But first of all, every day, every day, every day.

But this was the early days where we only did it at night.

Okay.

Instead of like, back in the day, we only had how this began was, we would have like a caveman thing.

It was a good idea.

When you go to the club dressed as a shower, right, you got like a shower curtain.

All the girls are like, no way to shower.

And then you get to meet all the girls.

Which was from Crown of Kid?

Yeah.

That's where I got it from.

But it doesn't happen when you're, um, oh, it was a good one.

When you're distressed in normal jeans and a tetrion.

So we'd have these themes.

So at one of these parties, there was a hot girl in me.

We were kind of thinking, you know, it would touchy-feely and it would drunk too.

So I'd get out my wallet, a cracked in half Viagra.

A good old blue diamond.

Yeah.

And I neck it down.

Boom.

As I'm walking out of the toilets, so no one would see.

But the bouncer sees.

The bouncer says, right, watch if you got there.

And all that was left was a bit of dust.

Yeah.

I'd be cracking half.

But I kept it in a little cardboard.

It looked like drugs.

Yeah.

So he said, come with me.

It took me outside.

We spoke to the police.

And then the police said, come with us getting the, and do you have like a massive erection?

Well, yeah.

Not yet.

But at every point they sort of, they ushered me into like, no, no, we're just going to have

a chat outside for a minute so you can hear.

So I believed him.

So I went outside.

Which I always does a bouncer.

That is the trick to get somebody outside.

Can we crack outside?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I said, oh, I'll just explain.

I'm a corn star.

And I'm a way too drunk.

So they're saying, I think he's on something else because he's too happy this guy.

And I'm not amazing.

I'm just like, overexcited about this situation.

So your still dress is a shower.

Yeah.

So now they're saying, getting the back of the cop car.

And I say, okay.

Is that, just fill out some paperwork or something.

And then he shuts it and we start driving somewhere.

And I'm like, excuse me, where are we going?

And he says, we've got a police station.

And I'm like, I'm getting arrested right now.

And I stayed the night in the south.

From Niagara.

For Niagara.

Did they test your blood or anything?

No, in the morning they said, oh, sorry about that.

We've tested the substance.

And it was just what you said it was.

And I'm like, yeah, I know.

You ruined my night.

At every stage throughout this, I'm thinking, I'll be back at the party soon.

So hang in there.

So the big question, you get to the jail.

You have a massive erection.

Do you get laid?

No, I did handstands.

Oh, you did handstands?

Practice handstands.

Do you think we were alone in there?

It's such a small space.

Yeah.

Okay.

You were in a hole in some of the bunch of people.

No.

So you're just in a very small space.

There's nothing to do on purpose.

They have just like a metal bed with no pillow.

Yeah.

Anything to do with handstands.

No.

I, she's, isn't so right.

It's distracting.

Yeah.

So I come, I'm not seem too distracted.

Well, I've talked to you.

I'm trying to use my sex.

Is this how you do sex?

So now that you've seen his penis up close, you've seen my penis before.

Which one is bigger?

His, sure.

The people want to know.

It's definitely his.

Very good.

But, okay, which one has like, you know, a better heart and more character?

Oh, I know you personally.

And I know you as a friend.

So I think it's just different.

Mm-hmm.

Which, do you think his penis would have like, a British voice?

Like what?

It's my choice.

Hello, mate.

And then we've got no.

We've got no.

What does mine say?

You're pussy.

It's like a very deep voice.

Gimmie that.

Give me that.

No.

There's a lot of like, yeah.

Yeah.

No, I think it's more like.

Give me.

Give me.

Yeah, your, your brand is like, it seems sweet and innocent, but once you get in there,

it'll destroy you.

Really not.

Yeah.

It's like.

Like that's the lure of everything, right?

Like expecting them expected.

I would compare your pussy to like, a guy giving candy to get you into his van.

And then your pussy is the van.

And then those doors shut.

And then you're like, what the fuck?

Just.

And then nobody knows what happened to you for the next like, two to, two time years.

I can't get it in there.

Until you appear again.

Should I leave the boots on?

I mean, it's up to you.

You can do whatever you want.

Oh my country man out there.

I just want to let you know that KVLV loves you.

I'm going to take this nice big car right up my pussy with these boots on.

Wow.

Just had to give him a little love, you know.

That's how you give people love?

Well.

Sometimes.

Hey.

That's your exit.

I can kind of do an American action.

Okay.

So the country accent or an American accent?

Well, hey there.

How you doing girl?

How can I have cowboy boots on you?

You got these big old cowboy tings.

You must have rags.

Yeah.

If you guys can switch that leg.

If I blow your head here, Clark.

I can pet your spikes.

Pet my spikes.

I wasn't driving a dialogue.

Yeah.

You must have done riding here on a wagon.

I like to ride my own wagon.

Yeah.

So we all talk like that.

I went to North Carolina, high school.

Oh, that's so funny.

And the North Carolina guy met me like the guy, the PE teacher.

When you went to high school in North Carolina.

Yeah.

Okay.

You weren't just an adult going to high school.

Where did you come to America?

For the first time the last year of high school when I was 18.

My old best friend used to live in North Carolina.

Where'd you live?

near to Raleigh.

Go to Turali.

You have to say it like that.

We would say Raleigh.

Raleigh.

You have to say Raleigh because you're American.

Yeah.

But yeah, he said, well, hey there.

And then the rest of the sentence, I didn't know what you said.

Oh, no, no.

This is not North.

I thought I was just shook his hand.

He shook my hand really hard.

Does that happen a lot when you're talking to Americans?

And you're like, what the fuck did you just say?

No, but people can't understand me.

That bullshit though, because I feel like your accent is like, it's not crazy.

It's like British.

You know, it's like English.

Yeah, but just odd things.

I'll call out the store and say, do you have any overripe bananas?

And they're like, I'm sorry.

I'm like over it like bananas.

You call for your bananas.

Yeah, I have to call them.

So what were all those big, he brought in the biggest fucking basket of like bananas and apples?

It was a box.

It was two crate boxes.

One of these.

I'll eat like four or five.

He's a fruitarian.

Fruitarian?

You're a fruitarian.

Raleigh eats his fruit and pussy.

What's the best fruit for like, hard dick?

Overripe bananas.

Question, yeah, probably bananas or watermelon.

Watermelon has a kind of aphrogesic effect.

It does make you horny.

Watermelon seeds.

You know what I mean?

I thought the seeds were poisonous.

No.

What?

I thought they grew in your belly when I was a kid.

I thought that I was going to be pregnant with the watermelon.

Yeah, watermelon.

With the watermelon seeds.

Is that how you get pregnant?

When did that?

Well, I've never been pregnant before, but.

What would you like to be?

Absolutely.

Yeah, we knew that.

We already knew that.

I want to be pregnant so bad, but like in four years, I think.

Right.

So then I can like, make all this porn for you guys.

So you're banging it out.

You're trying to have sex with as many people as you can so that you can get pregnant and

then just kind of walk away for a little bit.

Well, I'm not having sex with all these people to get pregnant.

You're practicing?

I'm practicing sex.

Well, without the condoms.

It's pretty dangerous to me.

It's kind of safe sex.

I mean, you do ruin people's emotional lives after they have sex with you.

I ruined your emotional life.

Do you tell other guys about me?

That I fucked you?

Yeah.

Only my girlfriends actually.

I don't really tell them any good.

Because they probably get intimidated.

I just don't really fuck that many people.

I imagine that they would.

You're one of like three people.

I used to really fuck.

That's it.

We had sex like three times.

Yeah, but that's like three times more than anybody else.

I really don't have off camera sex like at all.

You were special to me.

You hear me?

Well, I'm getting fucked by this.

You're special too, Clark.

Clark.

Not everybody can have a not as big penis.

Not only is your cock like uncut, which is the best, the best.

I would totally take you in my ass.

Organic.

Yes.

But it's also great because it's like straight and it has like the head is bigger than the

thing itself.

You know what I mean?

It's a little bit.

It's just perfect.

It's really, really good cock.

Thanks.

It's a great color.

10 out of 10 dick ratings.

I had it my whole life.

10 out of 10.

Did you?

Yeah.

We'll give you guys a close up flavor so you know what to aspire to.

Okay.

How many famous guys have you banged?

Well, I ought to talk about that.

You don't have to say anything.

Okay.

Let me count.

How famous?

How famous?

No.

I'm talking.

Not any part of famous people either, right?

Yeah.

Like mainstream famous.

I would say.

Let me count.

Like around a million Instagram followers famous.

Then three.

Interesting.

Yeah.

So what is the strategy?

Two recently.

If you were to give like pick up tips for famous guys who are trying to fuck you, what is the

best way to go about it?

Man, I would say really probably just don't text me online.

Like meet me in person.

I don't know.

Like go to a networking party.

Like one of the porn parties.

Because I, the thing is this famous people do text me a lot on Instagram, but I don't

respond because I'm like, I don't trust that.

You think it's one of their social media events?

Or I think that maybe it's like a scammer or something.

So I'm kind of like, well.

Trying to get pretty moods.

Looge.

Oh my God, my friend.

No.

I just think that I don't know.

I don't know.

It just freaks me out.

I'm very cautious when like people text me.

Yeah.

What is your, your password phone?

Um, I would have to tell you that.

Yeah.

Do you mind if I go through it?

Yeah, I'm kind of curious that you're like, let's see.

Go in there.

Straight for the messages too.

Oh wow.

Do you want to take off my boots so I don't hit your balls?

Oh, I thought it was kind of nice.

Okay, let me just get them farther back on your balls.

Interesting.

I'm trying to.

What would be better?

Should I go into your, your text messages or your Instagram?

I mean, you could do it.

Go for both.

You're so trusting.

I love this.

I don't have really anything to hide.

I feel like you're not even.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You're naked in the online.

Well, yeah.

And I'm doing this right now, aren't I?

Oh.

I like your camera by the way.

Whenever you're bored or got a girl and no cameraman, I'll slide.

This is an Instagram.

What is in it?

Yeah.

I was going to say nobody texts me that.

There's no way.

I think he replied, let's shoot sometime and you replied.

No.

Yes.

Oh, who was it?

It was a Massimo?

It was so distracting.

Oh, yeah.

He's good though.

He has good shit.

Oh, let's see who else.

Yeah, let me go pay attention.

You're all right.

Just don't want to stab your pretty balls with pretty blue shoes.

Here's a famous guy.

Is it?

Who is it?

You're not that famous.

You reach out to him.

She's slid into his hands.

No, that's a fucking story.

You can read that.

You can read that.

So I read the whole thing.

Yeah, I'm without his name.

Okay.

Can I say J?

Yeah.

She says hi J. Hey K, hope you've been good.

I have been.

Are you down to try it around too and hopefully get all the cameras going this time?

Yeah, because he fucking did it.

It's a darn shame we didn't get the whole thing.

Oh.

Yeah.

Do you think he did it just to fuck you again?

No, because I haven't seen him in two years.

And he literally waited like a week and a half or a week to tell me that he didn't get

all the footage.

And it was my first ever content collab.

So I was like, how the fuck are you going to do that to me?

Wow.

And he's famous.

That's funny.

This is like the most famous content creator.

Yeah, that there is.

And it was your first content shoot.

Ever.

And he fucked up.

Yeah.

And it was really, it couldn't be really bad experience, but he followed me the other day

and I was like, well, let me reach out to him.

I mean, I'm kind of over it now.

What's funny is he says, I shoot content full time and that's the only time that's ever

happened.

So embarrassed.

I couldn't hit you up again.

Yeah.

It's almost like when a guy doesn't get hard and he's like, this never happens.

It's like, oh, sure.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah.

There's so many of us that have been happy Easter.

Oh, you're sweating.

Oh, yeah.

I get it.

That's why I wear the cardigan to hide the sweat things, but I sweat through it.

I might squirt a little bit.

I'm sorry.

From my sweat?

I'm sorry.

No, it's just coming out.

It's not kooji.

I'm sorry, sir.

It's coming.

It's coming out one second.

I think this is my sweat.

Oh, you know what?

I'm so sorry.

There we go.

I'm so sorry.

Oh, that's a couple.

Just kind of.

Just kind of.

Ooh.

It just happened.

I'm sorry.

It's an Easter miracle.

I had to squirt for Jesus.

Now come on.

Come over here.

Come put your head right here and now I'll baptize you.

Come here.

Oh, my head right there.

The camera.

It's all.

Baptism.

Baptism.

Get that shit away from me.

How do you feel about squirt?

Is the piss or is it fucking?

You know, I feel like that's an existential question.

It's a question of identity.

What how does a squirt see itself?

You know what I mean?

Does it identify a squirt or does it identify as P in the moment?

Because things can be multiple things like you, for instance, you can be both a loving

wife and companion and yet a dirty dirty slut and they're not mutually exclusive.

Yeah.

So I think the squirt, you can identify as however it wants to identify it.

The real question, nobody ever asked the squirt, you know, what do you feel like you

are?

You know what?

I really feel like I'm going to cry.

What are you saying?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's emotional and I think it's okay for us to talk about these things.

So they feel like in poor you have to be serious all the time and they're like, we

just to normal life.

Yeah.

You're just thinking about how squirt wants to live in stays.

Yeah.

It just wants to live and wants to exist.

I have GPD, which is like good pussy disorder, you know.

Oh, that is a bad one.

How has that affected you?

Too many come shots and like, see, fucking.

Do you guys come to early?

Yes.

It's annoying.

Yeah.

But I love it.

It's a compliment.

Do you get like a handicapped placard for that?

You know, unfortunately no, they really just give me like, just, you know, a little metal.

I put it on my pussy.

You get a metal for having a good pussy?

Yeah.

Right?

It's tiny.

It's small?

It's just like, oh, the metal is small.

Yeah, it's like a pussy.

It's pretty big.

You can fit.

It's like a cargo bed pussy.

No, it's like, it's a Chevy spark.

What the fuck?

It's like one you'd want to live in.

Like you could spend significant amount of time in your pussy.

I want a tiny pussy.

No, it's.

Tell me on the comments below.

Is my pussy tiny or is it huge?

Look at this nice come shot I have.

Look at how thick that.

This is what a fruit of terry it's come looks like.

How thin about that?

Yeah, the more white it is, the more good it is.

Yeah, if it's clear, then you haven't got much.

You know what the worst is?

The yellow ones.

Well, I think that's called the chlamydia.

Oh, what the fuck?

I'm pretty sure it's a yellow come shot.

My, my, my, my.

I didn't know it.

But when I was when I did sugar baby a while ago, I had this old man find me.

Well, sometimes they're just yeah.

It's old.

That calm has probably been in there for two years.

Yeah, it aged calm.

It's like scotch that's brown that's been in the barrel too long.

His balls have.

It's been in there too.

I don't know.

No, this has been another episode of a fucking podcast.

Kay lovely.

Clark Kent.

Thank you guys.

Had some good sex.

Thank you guys.

Good conversation.

Got to some important issues.

I think we've covered it all.

We didn't really cure like world peace or anything, but we did.

We came close.

We came close.

We came pretty close.

Kind of.

Well, I hope you kiddies have a good day.

Write me out.

Yeah, me out.

Me out.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.