Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

[orchestral music]

Tsk tsk tsk.

Only 160 years for a crime like that?

They ought to have given him life.

[chuckles]

"J.C. Crosby, new school head.."

His wife was in the store this morning, Marge.

They’re going to the city for their summer vacation.

Now, that’s a funny thing.

City people come here for the summer

and we go to the..

Now, I told Charlie to change the price in these ads.

How am I ever gonna get any people into the store when..

Well, when my brassieres are higher than Goldman’s?

I told Esther we won’t wait any longer.

Everything will be spoiled.

We’re going right on without him.

Of course, I know it’s rude, but so is he.

The flies, mother.

But he’s half an hour late.

Oh, mom, that isn’t his fault.

You know how busy he gets sometimes.

He might at least have phoned.

A fine guest, I must say.

Blacky isn’t a guest, mother. He’s almost a son-in-law.

Almost a son-in-law is right.

In my time, young lady

’men didn’t take girls out for almost two years.’

Aw, don’t go into that again, mom, please.

I’ve told you a hundred times he likes me.

There’s nobody else. Only..

Well, he can’t get up enough nerve to ask me to marry him.

Well, can’t you coax him into it, easy-like?

You don’t think your father gave in without a struggle.

That’s right, Marge.

Took your mother almost three years to make up my mind.

Fred.

And you deserve lots of credit, mother.

Main 7-6-4-1.

$1.85, please.

Ninety cents even.

Hey, pull right up to the next pump, will you?

I’ll be right out.

You’re on a busy wire. Will you please get off the line?

Tell ’em you’re trying to call a doctor.

That will make ’em hang up.

Yes. And tell Blacky he’s going to get a cold dinner.

Hello? Hello.

Gorman Service Station.

Oh hello, mug! [car honks]

Yeah, I meant to phone and tell you.

[car honks] Say, wait a minute, will you?

Sure.

That’s what I thought happened, mom. He’s busy.

It’s a sin, coddling that boy this way.

Once Marge is married, she’d better stop it.

Not a chance now, mug.

[car honks] Oh boy, you ought to see the line.

Huh? No, that’s just it. Al didn’t show up.

What?

Your mother’s.. She is? [cars honk]

Well, square it for me, will you, Marge?

- Yeah. - The way she’s feeling now?

You don’t expect much. Only a miracle.

Okay. But don’t worry about it.

’Course I do.

Good-bye.

So he’s not coming at all? Well, I like that!

Where you going, Marge?

Do you hear me? Marge!

Uh, you go ahead without me. Poor Blacky.

I’ll bet he hasn’t had a mouthful of food all day.

I’ll see you later.

Hey!

What are you doing here?

Well, we had a date, didn’t we?

And I’m the kind of a gal what keeps her dates.

How do I stand with your mother by now?

Like this. And this is you.

Only she’ll get over it. What time you closing?

Oh, in a couple hours, I guess.

May I have the key to your shack?

Shack? Say, that’s an estate any bachelor would be proud of.

Is your, uh, stove working?

- On all six. - Well, we’ll try it.

Well, pull in your eyebrows when you light it.

You’re telling me.

Say, how would you like the potatoes fixed?

French fried.

You’ll take ’em mashed and like ’em.

Yeah? Well, what I’m gonna have--

What?

- Mashed potatoes and like ’em. - Well, that’s different.

Be there at 8:30, and wash up or no food, see?

I get it. No washy no eaty.

[whistles]

[Marge whistles]

(Marge) ’Don’t come in here.’

- I got a pass from the owner. - Oh, no, you don’t.

Now, keep on treating me this way, and one of these days

I’m gonna pack up my things and go home to mother.

I know, but this..

...this is private.

[sighs]

Sit down.

Thanks, pal. Boy, do these tootsies hurt.

And have I been taking it on the shins.

There ought to be a law making all running boards

the same distance from the ground.

How would you like me to crochet you

a nice little pair of shin guards?

Yeah. And make ’em baby blue to match my eyes, will you?

Well..

[sighs] ...had a great day today.

I knocked off over 80 bucks.

- Really? - Yeah.

[sniffs]

My favorite food!

Hey, wait a minute! Don’t go in there! Hey!

Hon, don’t go in there! It’s a surprise.

- Okay. I’m surprised. - Oh, no, no, no, no!

- Keep your nose out of there. - Mmm. Chicken pie.

Cream cheese.

Hey..

No messing now.

Stop it.

Get this all set.

Eddie Kent was in to see me again today.

Bought that vacant corner at Ninth and main.

Sure is a swell spot, alright.

And not only that. When Garfield Boulevard

is paved, we’ll get ’em coming and going.

- Think you can swing it? - Can I swing it?

Hey, just clamp your peepers on those figures.

Oh, gee, Blacky, I’m proud of you.

Proud of me?

Say, who nagged and hollered me into saving?

Who made me buy this shack?

Who dolled it up to look like a million?

Say, if it hadn’t been for you

I’d still be sitting on the curb fanning myself.

Aw!

You’re a swell little number, mug.

That’s mighty white of you to say that, sailor.

Thanks.

I guess your folks think I’m a washout.

I’m gonna give ’em the surprise of their lives pretty soon.

How soon, Blacky?

Oh, as soon as I crack through that Station on Ninth and Main.

Oh.

Haven’t you any other interests besides gas stations?

’Course I have. You know that.

You wouldn’t tell a girl?

Well, you.

Why, Mr. Gorman

your confession completely sweeps me off my feet.

Now, you know darn well I think you’re

one of the smartest, most sensible..

Grandmothers you’ve ever had.

Okay.

Well, now, as your grandmother, tell me something.

Are you in love with anybody?

No.

Well, that settles that.

Well, isn’t there anyone around here that you could..

...care for?

You mean in a big way?

Mm-hmm.

You mean you?

Why, I thought you knew that.

And I’m simply crazy about you, silly.

I suppose that knocks you over.

Oh, Marge.

You really mean it?

Gee, I was gonna wait a little while.

I mean, until I had plenty put by for us.

I thought a couple more gas stations..

What a man!

Gas on his mind and love in his heart.

And nothing in his stomach.

You know, that’s what this place needs, a woman.

Any woman, huh?

No, silly. You.

Mmm!

Boy, that’s the best chicken pie I ever ate.

[honks]

- What’ll it be? - A drop of petrol please.

I’m sorry we don’t sell less than a gallon.

I mean to say fill it up.

Right-o.

[in German accent] Maybe he knows where lives Mrs. Franklyn’s house.

[in British accent] Oh, I say, can you tell us

where we shall find Mrs. Franklyn’s residence?

No. I’m sorry. I can’t help you out. I never heard of her.

[in French accent] She buy big house near the big ocean.

Well, hope she likes our little town.

I’m sure we don’t need to worry.

We’ll find it down near the ocean somewhere.

Ja, sure!

That will be 2.94.

Charge it to Mrs. Franklyn.

What? Hey, wait a minute!

Hey, Al, do you know Mrs. Franklyn?

Oh, I knew a Mrs. Kelly Franklyn once.

’Where does she live?’

Well, I’m not just quite sure.

You see, she’s been dead about 12 years now.

Aren’t you mama’s great big helper!

- Hi, Al. - Hiya, Margie.

[Blacky whistling]

[cash register rings]

[laughs]

Hello, Marge.

[car tires screech]

[clattering]

Oh, I’m so sorry.

That’s alright.

- Gas? - Please.

You better not leave it there.

I’m not very good on the turn.

Think those buildings over there will be safe?

Do you suppose you could move them just a trifle?

Then I’d be sure to hit them all.

That will be 1.68.

Charge it to Mrs. Franklyn.

To who?

To Mrs. Franklyn, my mother.

Oh, yeah? Well, where is your mother?

I don’t know.

Would you mind telling me where she lives?

Why, that’s just what I was going to ask you.

Now, listen here, lady, I’m trying to run a business.

I can’t charge things to people who don’t even know

where they live.

Well, um..

Let’s see. I can let you have, uh

sixty cents, a key

a beauty shop card, and my compact.

Haven’t you any idea of the address?

Is there, um, a Wadsworth place?

Oh, the Three Gables?

The big house on the point at Silver Beach?

That’s it. Silver Beach.

Oh, there’s a car full of accents

just went through here for there.

- Accents? - Yeah.

One "was ist das", one "ooh la la", and one "cheerio".

- ’Oh, the servants.’ - ’Yeah.’

Now that you know where I live

would you tell me how to get there?

Well, you go straight down here till you come to the ocean.

The way you drive, you can’t miss the ocean.

And then you turn to the left.

- Oh, the left. - No. That’s your right.

This is your left.

Well, you just keep bearing to your left

until you come to the house.

Well, thanks very much. I’m sure I’ll find it.

- Kind of cute, isn’t she? - She sure is.

Did you see what she did to my chaise lounge?

What a reckless driver.

I’ll bet she’s dangerous, too.

[vehicle approaches, honks]

Look, you’re pretty busy. I’ll run along.

Okay. I’ll see you tonight, honey, about 8:30.

Never mind the gas, buddy.

Where’s Mrs. Franklyn’s house?

- Is that Mrs. Franklyn? - Yes.

How do you do, Mrs. Franklyn?

I feel I know you.

I’ve done a rushing business in your address today.

Your daughter just drove by. I think she’s swell.

She wrecked my bench, but I can fix it alright.

You owe me for 22 gallons of gas

but don’t bother to pay me now.

I’ve opened a charge account in your name.

(driver) ’Hey, buddy.’

Excuse me.

Will you tell me where it is?

Yeah. You just go straight down here to the waterfront

and then keep bearing to the left. You can’t miss it.

Right. Thanks.

Bye, Mrs. Franklyn.

Call again.

- Morning, Miss Franklyn. - Gosh, you got here fast.

Well, speed’s in the Gorman blood.

My great-grandmother was frightened

by Paul Revere’s horse.

What else seems to be the matter?

Well, that jigger there is loose.

It is for a little way, and then it isn’t for a little while.

And then all of a sudden it is again.

Well, that jigger is the front axle

and it’s not loose. It’s broken.

You made a perfect shot that time.

Yeah. The traffic signal. Look. It said "go" at the time.

Yeah. You’re doing okay.

How long will it take you to fix it?

Do you expect me to pull a rabbit out of my hat, too?

What do you mean?

Well, this car’s got to go to the hospital.

Oh, but I’ve got to go to the Country Club right away.

- I’m pouring. - Pouring?

- Tea, silly. - Oh.

Well, I tell you what. I’ll send a cab back for you.

Well, why can’t I ride with you?

Well, you don’t care what you ride in or who sees you, do you?

Well, if I’m not particular, why remind me of it?

Come on. Let’s go.

(Blacky) Alright.

Sorry. I don’t usually start that way.

I nearly always do.

- Isn’t that a grand idea? - What’s that?

No fenders to be dented when you run into things.

There’s only one car for you.

What’s that? Maybe I’ll get it.

Well, it’s got no fenders, no tires, and no headlights.

It’s practically unbreakable. It’s called a tank.

- This is lots of fun. - What? Riding in this heap?

Oh, it’s not so bad.

Hey, you ought to see the slick little roadster

I have when I step out.

- Step out? - Sure.

You wouldn’t know me in my tux and wrought-iron shirt.

Where could you go around here?

We got nightclubs and roadhouses

just like you’ve got in New York.

Gyps and racketeers and everything.

Take the Club High Tide, for instance.

Can’t crack down on that place with less than a tux.

You go there often?

Well, it’s mostly supportive of the summer crowds.

Every once in a while us natives

feel like suckers and give ourselves up.

Yeah, I’m not a bad-looking guy when I’m all dressed up.

[laughs]

[upbeat music]

You haven’t been dancing with me tonight.

Huh?

- Okay. I’ll bite. - No. I mean it.

Well, you know darn well I’ve danced every number with you.

Not with me, you haven’t.

Well, that’s the first time two little drinks

ever made you act this way.

Oh, the feet have been dragging themselves

around with little Marge

but the mind has been stepping out for little Glory.

Me dancing with Glory Franklyn?

Ha! What a laugh.

Yeah. I’m practically convulsed.

Don’t be silly.

You’ve been watching that door ever since we came in.

You have, too, liar.

Well, I don’t know what gives you these goofy ideas.

You’ve been talking about her all evening.

Well, all I said was

"Not many rich dames would ride in a truck

with a guy in greasy old clothes."

Well, not many dames would.

I’ve ridden with you when you looked a lot worse

and I didn’t hear any cheering.

Well, you’ve seen me dressed up. She hasn’t.

Which gives her something to live for, doesn’t it?

What did that set you back? Four bucks?

And a half.

[music ends, applause]

Tired, honey?

Well, we’ll finish this drink and then blow.

Oh, look at that crowd.

What did I tell you, Sid? The whole town’s out tonight.

Still want to go?

Well, whatever you say.

Good evening, sir. A table for two?

- Yeah. - Step this way.

- How’s this one? - I don’t like it.

It’s too near the orchestra.

Sorry, sir. It’s the best I can do right now.

Why don’t you ask them to join us?

What for?

Well, I’ve heard so much about her, I’d like to meet her.

And you can talk oil and gas to her boyfriend.

Go on.

I have got a nice table right over here in the corner.

Well, I’d rather go home.

- How do you do? - Oh, hello!

I haven’t hit anything for three whole days.

Well, we’ll have to get some kind of a medal for you.

This is Mr. Larrick, Mr. Gorman.

- How do you do? - How do you do?

We have an awfully nice table over here. Won’t you join us?

We’d love to.

Oh.

Perhaps we’d better not.

Oh, Miss Harris would like to have you. Really.

Oh, that’s very sweet of her. Come on, Sid.

Miss Harris, may I present Miss Franklyn?

- How do you do? - How do you do?

And Mister.. I’m sorry.

- I forgot your name. - Larrick.

- Mr. Larrick, Miss Harris. - How do you do?

Won’t you sit down?

We drove in the open car. My hair must be a sight.

No. It looks swell.

Let’s make faces.

Come with me, and I’ll show you where.

It was sweet of you to ask us over, Miss Harris.

Oh, don’t call me Miss Harris.

It’s so woolen-underweary.

Marge is the name.

And mine’s Glory.

Sid says I use too much. You think so?

No. Blacky’s the same way.

These conquering males are certainly finicky.

Especially when you’re engaged to them.

You’re telling me.

Oh, are you.. Are you engaged?

Uh-huh.

Oh.

So are we.

How’s that, Marge?

The boyfriend will think that’s grand.

Going to be married soon?

Oh, one of these fine Sundays

when Blacky can divorce himself from his work.

He’s lots of fun, isn’t he? And very attractive.

Yeah.

If he were mine, I’d marry him fast.

You mean before he fell for somebody else?

Or somebody else fell for him.

Well, he’s the type, alright

but that’s the chance you take.

I wouldn’t. I mean, if I were engaged to him.

Mine isn’t going to be one of those hit and run marriages.

No, ma’am.

No wedding bells for baby until the blushing bridegroom

has made up his mind for keeps.

Of course, I hope he has.

My, what a cute lipstick.

With a watch.

- Like it? - Oh, it’s a honey.

- Have a cigarette? - No, thanks.

I have these made to order.

I require an extra mild cigarette.

Well, if this makes you dizzy or anything, just let me know.

[music begins]

Ooh, what lovely music. Shall we dance?

Fine. Alright.

I’m not very good at fox-trots.

I hope you don’t mind.

I know. You want to surprise me.

It was a kick at that.

Me dancing with a million bucks worth of class.

Hey, wait a minute, Marge.

I guess I’m just a big sap.

No, you’re not. You’re just human.

I want you to be that way.

Only, Blacky, don’t ever, ever

try to hold out on me. Always tell me things.

Everything’s gonna be alright, mug.

You just said so yourself.

Now, listen, honey.

Glory Franklyn doesn’t mean a thing, and you know it.

You and I are gonna be married just like I told you.

Why, there isn’t a guy in this town

that wouldn’t give his right eye to be in my shoes.

You can trot rings around Glory Franklyn

or anybody else, see?

No, I can’t, but I love to hear you say so.

You can trot rings around Glory Franklyn or anybody else.

[car approaches]

[tires screech]

[crash]

I’m afraid I’ve ruined your nice new bench.

Don’t be afraid. You have.

The next one’s gonna be made out of iron

with a red light and a bell on it.

It’s those darn brakes. Can you fix them for me?

No. I’m afraid you’ll have to take it to a garage.

Here’s the best place in town.

Fella named Brody. He’s a friend of mine. He’ll take care of you.

Oh!

Isn’t that a darling little house?

Yeah, I think it is.

- Yours? - Uh-huh.

Uh, are you gonna live there? You and Marge?

Well, if she doesn’t lose her nerve and run out on me.

Gee, some girls are lucky.

Well, you don’t have it so tough.

And I suppose you think I have everything in the world I want.

Well, if you haven’t, you can have it ordered, sent COD.

Yes, but when it comes, do you know what it’ll be?

No, what?

Something that mother and her silly old adviser staff

decided was best for me.

Gee, that doesn’t seem right.

Of course it’s not right.

I don’t want every moment of my life planned for me.

And I’m sick of seeing the same ol’ people

and going to same ol’ places

and listening to same ol’ cut-and-dried talk

day in, day out.

Every time I complain, it’s

"Glory, we know what’s best for you." Best for me.

Well, why don’t you run out on ’em. Give ’em the air.

You don’t know mother.

I can’t do anything I want to do.

Why can’t I get something out of life

like other girls do?

Well, now, don’t you let her get you down.

Everything will be alright when you and..

...you and the boyfriend get hitched.

It’s pretty soon now, isn’t it?

Oh, I don’t know.

They’re even planning that for me.

[Glory sobs] Well, now, don’t you worry.

All your troubles will be over then.

You’ll be on your own, and you can tell ’em all to go to..

[sobs loudly]

What’s the matter? Did I say something wrong?

Oh, I don’t want to marry Sid Larrick.

Oh, you poor kid. You’ll be alright.

Aw, that’s alright.

[laughs]

I think you’d feel a lot better if you came inside.

I feel a whole lot better now.

Well, you’ll feel more comfortable in here.

Here you are.

Now you sit right down there.

Now, you try and relax.

Will you get me a drink of water?

Sure.

There you are. You ought to drink lots of water.

It’s great for the.. for the system.

Got a cigarette?

There you are.

There you are. Now you’re all set.

I’m sorry I’ve been such a nuisance.

You’ve been awfully sweet.

[car approaches]

Hello, Marge. Hiya.

- Hello, Blacky. Hello, Glory. - How are you?

Well, I-I must rush along.

I...I’ve been having some trouble with my brakes.

Don’t forget to ask for Chick Brody.

Oh, thanks. I will.

If you’ll wait just a few minutes, I’ll drive you down.

Oh, that’s alright. Well, good-bye.

- Good-bye. - Good-bye, Glory.

Better wipe your lip.

Huh?

It isn’t your shade at all.

Aw, now, listen, Marge. It isn’t what you think it is.

Honest, it isn’t.

She came in to see me about her brakes. They’re bad.

Bad brakes for her but a good break for you.

Huh?

I didn’t know whether you wanted mayonnaise or French dressing.

What were you saying?

Well-well, she started telling me her troubles

and, well, she’s just a kid

and her mother and that gang ride her.

She was so darn unhappy, the first thing I knew

she was cryin’ on my shoulder.

Gee, I didn’t know what to do.

You didn’t do so bad. Your lunch is ready.

Oh, I acted like a sap, alright

but it doesn’t mean a thing.

Let’s forget it.

You can’t forget it, Blacky.

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

You’ll be crazier about her than ever

and you’re plenty cuckoo over her now.

Listen, Marge, we’re all set to get married.

Does that sound like I was stuck on her?

It sounds like a nice kid

who made up his mind to keep his word

but we’re not going through with it.

You wouldn’t want to be tied to me

and in love with somebody else, would you?

But it isn’t that.

In the first place, Glory and I are in two different worlds.

Why, she wouldn’t have me in a million years.

But suppose she would.

Oh, we’re talking like a couple of fools.

Listen, mug, we’re gonna get married today. Right now.

And you get this, Blacky. Marrying me isn’t going to get

Glory out of your head, see?

I wouldn’t want you that way.

I love you, but if I’m to be hurt

I’d much rather take it now than later.

Gee, Marge, I..

She’s got an awful crush on you.

Why, she’d take you in a minute.

Do you know what it would mean?

A shortcut, Blacky, to everything you wanted.

It’s there, waiting for you.

A chance at heaven.

Better grab it.

We’ll still be friends.

Always, I hope.

You have to have someone to talk to

about your oil and gas

and where to put the air compressor.

And I’ll still want to listen.

[instrumental music]

The next place I visit is all gonna be on one floor.

These stairs are getting me down.

I hope it wears down your resistance.

We’ve been looking all over for you two.

What luck? Did you find them?

No. We gave up the search. We looked and looked and looked.

Well, I never saw a man require so much lipstick just looking.

Fresh.

What report on Glory and her local Tarzan?

We didn’t see them.

He must have gathered her up and swung into the treetops.

I can’t say I blame Glory.

- What shoulders. - Oh.

[indistinct chatter]

[imitates Tarzan’s call]

Hey, Betty, they’re out on the terrace! Come on.

Oh, boy. It looks like a touchdown.

It looks like.. it is a touchdown!

What have they to talk about?

I mean after they exhaust the subject of gas and oil.

- They’re not talking. - How do you know?

Well, if I had him out there on a night like this

there wouldn’t be any talking.

Please, Miss Bruce, there are gentlemen present.

Scotch and soda, sir.

Oh, yes. Come along you peeping Toms.

We’ve got a lot of drinking to do.

Okay.

I don’t feel any happier about it than you do.

Service station Romeo.

Well, it certainly places me in an awkward position.

Oh, my dear Sid.

He was invited here so that he could be made to understand

how thoroughly out of place he is.

After tonight, there will be no more trouble from him

I assure you.

[instrumental music]

- Blacky. - Huh?

You seem so.. so quiet.

Anything wrong?

It’s that view.

Did you ever see anything like it?

That’s odd. I never noticed it before.

You’re crazy.

Why, you get this every night.

They don’t pull in those trees and that sky.

I never saw those trees and that sky before.

Well, what do you look at when you sit out here?

Those lights way over there in the distance.

- Oh, Pleasure Park. - What’s that?

A place where us common herd go

when we want to have a good time.

What do you do there?

Are you kidding?

No. I’m serious.

Well, you know, there’s a scenic railway.

It goes way down and then up again.

And there’s a Ferris wheel that goes around

then there’s sort of a scooter

shakes you up and down, worse than my truck.

And there’s lots of other things.

It’s not much fun, though.

I’ve always wanted to go to one of those places.

I don’t get you.

Here you are sitting here looking at those lights

wanting to be there. You think it’d be fun.

And I’ll bet you right now they’re sitting there

looking at these lights wishing they were here.

It’s funny.

Blacky

will you take me to Pleasure Park sometime?

Any time you say.

Can we go there more than once?

Every night if you want to.

For how long?

As long as you want.

Huh?

You really mean it?

Uh-huh.

I’ll get my things.

And every time I ask Glory to set a date

she keeps putting me off.

Well, you can’t bully her into marriage.

She’s a romantic child, and you’ve got to humor her.

Well, what ought I to do?

Well, make love to her.

Oh, yes, of course.

And just what do you think would be the best way?

Well, go downstairs and find her

take her out on the veranda with you

let her look at the trees and the sky

and then tell her how much you love her.

And after that?

After that?

Why...why, you sweep her off her feet.

Alright.

I’ll sweep her off her feet.

[Mrs. Franklyn sobs] Oh!

[indistinct chatter]

Say, we’ve been trailing you two all day.

Just want to get a couple of pictures of you.

Won’t you step over a little further?

Just a little further. Don’t be bashful, now.

(reporter #1) Here they come. We got ’em at last.

Don’t be bashful. These are all famous photographers.

Right-right-right there. There they are, boys.

Now, look at ’em and smile.

You know, a great big honey-dovey smile.

(reporter #2) ’Okay, hold it a second. Now put your arm around her.’

(reporter #3) ’That’s the idea.’

’Now give her one of them "my itsy-bitsy bride" smiles.’

(reporter #4) ’Now one for me, please. Hold her hand.’

’No, no, no, look at him as if you was gaga!’

’No. More gaga!’

’There! That’s it!’

’Got it!’

Are you gonna live here or at the Three Gables?

Is it true that you were engaged to Sid Larrick?

If I’d married Sid, there would just have been

a stuffy old church wedding

instead of reporters, movies, and everything.

Say, shrimp, when you married me

you hooked up with front-page stuff.

Have you spoken to your mother since you married?

Would you mind telling me, Mrs. Gorman

what you wore at the wedding?

What did I wear?

Well, now, it seems to me it was some kind of a dress.

[laughter]

Isn’t it fun? [phone rings]

Oh, I’ll get that.

Oh, listen, fellas, we just got in.

We’re plenty tired, so if you’ll excuse us..

Wait just a minute, now. It’ll only take a second.

Just a couple of more questions.

How many gallons of gasoline

did she ask you for when you first met?

Well, I tell you what. If you give me

about an hour to wash up and change

I’ll meet you at the gas station and tell you the works.

Right-o.

[indistinct chatter]

Boy, are those babies a nosy bunch of guys.

Who phoned?

Marge. She called up to congratulate us.

- Oh. - I asked her to come over.

Oh, gee, honey, don’t you think it’s kind of funny?

Why?

I like her, and I hope she likes me.

I don’t see why we can’t continue to be friends.

Do you like the house?

Is it really ours? Do we own it?

Mm-hmm. It’s not very much, but it has no plaster on it.

Oh, don’t worry, darling.

We’ll have it put on later.

[gasps]

Yeah. I know.

Dust is kind of sacred to that cleaning gal of mine

but we’ll get a regular maid who will do all the work.

I’m taking care of this place from now on.

And when I think we can afford a maid, we’ll get one.

Oh, but..

Until then, a cleaning woman once a week

and I’ll pick her out.

Now, you don’t mean to tell me you’re gonna put those

pretty little hands in dishwater.

That’s exactly what I’m gonna do.

But, darling, you didn’t marry a guy

with one foot in the poor house.

I got some money saved.

Oh, I have other plans, too.

This is a very charming home

but it’ll be even more beautiful after it’s all done over.

Done over? You mean all four rooms?

Oh, Blacky, can’t you just see this room

all cream and...and scarlet?

And the entrance hall..

Oh, I forgot. There isn’t any.

Well, we can have one easily enough--

Oh, never mind, darling.

We’ll take the dining room, and we’ll..

[knock on door]

Well, I will let you get us a doorbell.

That must be Marge.

Hello, Marge.

Well, well, well, if it isn’t

the old married man of the mountains himself.

Funny. You haven’t changed a single bit.

Well, I pulled out all the gray hairs just before you came.

- Hello, Marge. - How’s the child bride?

Anything you’d like to whisper in my ear?

Oh, say, I brought you a present.

Oh, Marge, you shouldn’t have.

Oh, it’s nothing much, but it’s the one thing

you do need in this house.

It’s just outside the door, Blacky.

Must be..

Oh, that’s exactly what we do need. Thanks, Marge.

Well, when I heard you were back

and I thought of that poor little icebox

with the sun beating down on it for hours and hours

I thought its little throat might need cooling.

To say nothing of mine. I’m gonna put this to work.

Gee, Marge, you’re a swell sport.

Makes me feel as if I’d done something kind of sneaky.

Oh, you precious infant.

You know, I really didn’t do it deliberately.

I just couldn’t help it.

You’re telling me?

That’s what he does to all us females.

I like you, Marge, a lot.

I want you to like me.

I think you’re a swell kid.

Coming up, service with a smile.

Oh, that’s a short one. That’s for Glory.

Since when can’t I hold my liquor like a lady?

Here’s to you, and may trouble never darken your door..

...any of them.

Uh-oh.

Blacky, what are we gonna do?

Well, we’re married now. It’s too late to do anything.

Since when does marriage make it too late for anything?

[knock on door]

Won’t you come in, Mrs. Franklyn?

Mother!

How do you do, Mrs. Franklyn?

How do you do?

Uh, mother, this is Miss Harris.

How do you do, Mrs. Franklyn? Happy to meet you.

Miss Harris.

Uh..

Oh, uh, Blacky, fix mother a highball.

- Alright. - No, thank you.

Well, I guess I’d better be going.

Good-bye, Glory. Come and see me soon, won’t you?

- I’d love to. - Good-bye, Mrs. Franklyn.

Oh, Blacky, you needn’t bother.

Oh, that’s alright.

Oh, Glory, Glory, how could you do

such a heartless thing to your poor mother?

Now, mother!

I’ll never get over it, never. As long as I live.

[sobbing]

Here. Take a sip. It’ll make you feel better.

[sobs]

Darling, there’s nothing to cry about.

Blacky’s the sweetest, most adorable thing in the world.

And for the first time in my life

I’m genuinely happy.

I know what’s best for you, child.

Now you’ve ruined your life completely.

Oh, it’s dreadful!

Oh, it isn’t, and you know it isn’t.

Don’t you want me to be happy?

Well, I am.

If you only knew how much.

[sobs]

Well, it’s done now.

I suppose I shall have to make the most of it.

Darling, I knew you’d be sweet about it.

[Mrs. Franklyn sobs]

Gee, Mrs. Franklyn,

I’m sorry our marriage upset you.

I-I guess we should ve hat you in on it

but...well, I was so darn crazy about Glory.

When she said she’d marry me, I..

Well, it couldn’t have been too soon.

I guess we shouldn’t have..

[sobs]

Anyway, I’ll break my neck trying to make her happy.

Honest I will.

I hope so. I’m sure you will.

Now we must decide what you’re going to do with yourself.

Who, me? Oh, I’m all set.

Well, I’m afraid you don’t understand.

I’m afraid you don’t.

You see, I don’t just work in the gas station. I own it.

Yes. I know, but I mean we must find

some suitable occupation for you in New York.

Well, we’re not going to New York.

We’re staying here.

Why, you can’t bury yourself in this small town.

Why, it’s preposterous.

Well, I suppose this sounds like chamber of commerce stuff

but we’ve the healthiest climate in the state.

I’ve got a good business here, and it’s steady.

I hope to own a flock of gas stations someday.

And someday I’m gonna be head man in this burg.

Why, you mind living here, do you, Glory?

Oh, I love it. We’re going to have the whole house done over.

- This room is going to be-- - You’re only a child.

And mother knows what’s best for you.

I insist that you live in New York.

Now, wait a minute.

Glory stays right here.

I know what’s best for Glory.

She happens to be my daughter.

She also happens to be my wife

and I have a few ideas of my own on that subject.

Glory stays here, and that’s that.

[knock on door]

Some baggage for you.

Well, you must have the wrong house.

No trunks coming here.

Oh, wait. I sent a few things over for Glory.

I thought you might need them, dear.

My mistake, buddy. Bring it in.

There we are. Put it right over there.

Fine.

Here. Here.

Oh, we could put one right here, too.

Easy does it.

- Can you make it? - Oh, yes.

Oh, dear, I must fly now. I’m late for my massage.

- Good-bye, dear. - Good-bye, dear.

Oh, dear, dear.

Well, good-bye, uh..

Blacky’s the name. So long.

Where do you want this one?

Well, right, right there is alright, I guess.

Here you go.

You midget. For a minute, I thought something had happened.

Something has happened. Come and see all the work I’ve done.

Well, that oughtn’t to take long.

Oh, see? Aren’t they cute? I did all those.

Why, you little toadstool.

Oh, I missed a little there

but I can get it off with your razor.

And I put six of them right up here.

- Aren’t they cute? - Yeah.

What the..

Hey, what are you doing here?

Well, Glory phoned me and asked me to come right over

and when I got here, I found the little woman

in the middle of the floor crying

with a can of paint beside her as big as she is

crying because she couldn’t get the lid off.

So I started doing this to make her stop.

What do you think of it?

Isn’t it beautiful? Help Marge down.

- Alright. - I’ll take this.

Here we go.

Blacky, you can finish.

- Oh, not me. - Can’t you paint?

Oh, well, I can get paint on and off a brush

if that’s what you mean

but my arm’s tired from signing autographs all day.

Boy, and has business jumped.

Say, they’ve been coming from miles and miles

just to see the nasty old oil man

who married the pretty blond heiress.

Well, I see you got rid of the trunks.

- What did you do with them? - We put them in the cellar.

In the cellar? Say, did you two dig a cellar?

No, in Marge’s cellar.

Oh, well, Glory, we can’t do that.

Why not? Where else was there to put them?

Well, I can just imagine your mother

when she bumps her shins into one of them.

Why the miniatures?

Because I thought they were so cunning.

They’ll just match this room when it’s finished.

Yeah. About the same size.

I got them at the 5-and-10

and some silver material for the drapes.

And, oh, Blacky, I saw the most wonderful rug for our bedroom.

At the 5-and-10?

No, crossy. Isn’t he cute?

Aw, cut that out.

He’s just like a husband.

They always come home cranky from work.

When will it get here?

I didn’t buy it yet.

I have to save for it out of the house money.

Now, listen here.

Anyone would think to hear you talk I was a pauper.

I got a bank balance

and I want you to get anything you want.

But stay out of the 5-and-10.

Oh, Blacky, don’t you know how to play?

Play?

Why, sure I know how to play. Come on, Marge.

♪ London Bridge is falling down ♪

♪ Falling down falling down

♪ London Bridge is falling down ♪

♪ My fair lady ♪

Well, that’s funny. She didn’t even say good-bye.

I wonder what’s the matter with her?

You must think I’m an awful pest, Marge, dear

but the new furniture arrived this morning

and I’m so anxious to surprise Blacky.

I want to cook the dinner

something he especially likes.

Well, that would be chicken pie.

Oh, it sounds complicated.

Do you suppose you could tell me how to make it?

Sure. It’s very simple.

First you get a nice, fat chicken

and then you draw it--

Oh, I couldn’t do that.

Well, of course, you can get the butcher to do it

only I like to do it myself.

You see, I like to render the fat

and do things with the gizzard and liver.

Well, let’s skip that. Maybe I better write it down.

Alright, go ahead.

Oh, you boil it first.

Then you what?

Oh.

Wait a minute, Marge. I’m all mixed up.

I don’t know whether you said four cups of baking powder

and a teaspoon of flour or--

I think I’d better come over and make it for you.

I’ll stop and get the chicken, too.

Good-bye.

(Glory) ’It’ll be the first year I haven’t had a new one.’

’Blacky says maybe next year.’

’He wants me to keep this one’

’and get new tires and top and new paint.’

’He says it’ll be just like new.’

Oh, is it finished already?

Not quite, dear. It needs a little baking.

Oh. Here I meant to watch every move you made.

How did I ever get so side tracked?

Gosh, Marge, I’ll just never learn to cook things.

Why are you so nice?

After all, you know

we really shouldn’t be such good friends.

Oh, Glory Gorman, you’re a goose.

You know very well I’m always ready to help you

any time you need me.

All I want is to see you two kids happy.

Now, you turn the oven regulator to 450

and leave it that way for 15 minutes.

And then you turn it to 350

and leave it that way till, uh..

...um, 6:30 but not a minute longer.

No. I won’t.

Well, I better make sure.

[doorbell rings]

Well, Mr. Gorman

how do you like your nice new living room?

Gee, it’s swell!

- Oh, bread and butter. - Bread and butter?

- See the new picture? - Yeah.

Isn’t it grand?

Oh, you don’t like it?

Oh, sure I do. I think it’s a knockout.

What did you do with the old one?

I put it out in the garage with your old slippers.

Come right over here and sit down

in your nice easy chair

and put on your new slippers and relax.

I’ll call you when dinner’s ready.

Gee, this is what I call solid comfort.

[alarm rings]

[alarm continues ringing]

[alarm continues ringing]

Hey, where’s the fire?

You have to get out.

Well, I just thought I’d try and help you out with the dinner.

Well, you can see if the salt and pepper is on the table.

Alright.

Everything’s okay, general.

You can take those in and serve them

and I’ll be right in with the...the rest.

Alright.

Boy, chicken pie!

I hope you like it.

Mmm. Sure smells good.

There you are.

Mmm.

Get going, honey. Don’t wait for me.

Mmm. That’s the best chicken pie I ever ate.

Oh, hello, Marge.

What? You sounded rather excited over the phone.

What’s the matter? Your house on fire or something?

I feel pretty shaky.

Oh, gin! Could I have a drink?

Mm-hmm. I thought you’d be crying for some.

Go on. Sit down.

Make yourself over at our house.

What will you have it with?

Ginger ale...or, uh, ginger ale?

I’ll just take mine straight.

Quit kidding the bartender.

No, I do want it straight.

Hmm.

Rub it in your hair if you like.

Thanks.

Aah!

Aah! I don’t see how you can drink it that way.

Well, if Dr. Jamieson had told you what he just told me

you’d take a good drink, too.

Glory..

Really?

Well, aren’t you thrilled?

Oh, I’m scared to death.

Well, does Blacky know?

Well, I haven’t told anyone yet.

Oh, I’m so afraid.

Well, I guess everyone is at first

but think how wonderful it would be.

Why, Blacky would be the happiest boy in the world.

Yes, but what about me?

Oh, Marge, I’m such a coward.

I can’t bear to suffer.

Suffer.

Why, you talk as if you’re the only woman in the world

who’s going to have a baby.

Well, you talk as if it’s fun to have one.

Well, of course it isn’t fun at first

but think of afterwards.

Why, darling, it’ll be the grandest fun

you’ve ever had in your life.

Imagine an adorable little baby all your own to take care of.

A little Blacky to bathe and feed

and undress and hold.

You’ll be the happiest woman in the world

and Blacky will love you to death.

How about another slug, huh?

Oh, uh, I’ll just take plain water.

Okay, doc.

- Okay, papa. - Huh?

Congratulations. What are you gonna name it?

Junior?

What?

Hey, what’s the joke?

[laughs]

Well, I sure must be getting dumb. What’s so funny?

Haven’t you heard? You’re gonna have a baby.

I’m gonna have a..

Why, it’s all over town.

Everybody knows about it.

- Yeah, everybody but me. - Huh?

Why, you’re only a child yourself.

You haven’t the faintest conception

of what you’d have to go through.

I’m your mother, darling.

And I’m only thinking of your happiness.

You must go to New York with me.

Say, half-pint, what’s all this talk I’m hearing?

What talk?

Well, can you beat that?

There’s a rumor around town that I’m gonna be a daddy.

Is there anything to it, honey?

Uh-huh.

Aw, gee, darling.

How come you never told me?

I bet you knew all about it.

Why shouldn’t I? I’m her mother.

’And I’ve just been telling Glory--’

Yes, I can guess what you’ve been telling her.

Well, now you let me tell you something.

- Now, Blacky, please. - Okay. I’m sorry.

How long have you been here?

Why, about two hours.

Will you do me a favor?

Will you step into the other room for about 5 minutes?

I want to tell my wife how much I love her.

Oh.

Hear that?

I’m salting away all my small change.

Gonna start a bank account for the offspring.

First thing you know, that guy will be born

with a gold spoon in his mouth just like you.

[Glory and Blacky laugh]

Blacky

Glory and I have been talking things over

and I’m leaving for New York tomorrow

and I think she should come along with me.

I thought we had all that settled.

Blacky, I know that you love Glory.

Well, that’s one of the few things you and I agree on.

And I know that you want to do everything possible

to make her happy and comfortable.

Check.

Well, then, don’t you see that it would be better for her

to be in New York with me

where she’d have every creature comfort and convenience

and where she’d have her own mother to give her proper care

and the finest doctors?

This doctor I got is a baby shark.

Why, all he does is have babies.

He sets you back 250 bucks

just to tell you you’re gonna have one.

We’d have found that out ourselves in time.

I don’t doubt that your doctor’s satisfactory.

But think of all the other things I could do for Glory

things that you couldn’t possibly do for her here.

And I know that you want Glory to have the best of everything.

Do you want to go, honey?

Well, um, the change might do me some good

and it would make mama awfully happy.

Okay. Only don’t stay too long.

[phone rings]

Hello.

Hello, Mignon?

This is Mr. Gorman. I want to speak to Mrs. Gorman.

I say this is Mr. Gorman. I want to speak to Mrs. Gorman.

Is she there?

She isn’t?

Well, what time will she be back?

I say what time will she be back?

Oh, she’s leaving New York?

She’s got her things all packed?

Well, alright, never mind.

Hello, Marge, old gal!

Well, did a rich uncle die and leave you a million?

Better than that. Glory’s coming home.

Well, did she wire you?

Uh-uh. I think she wants to surprise me.

Well, uh, how did you find out?

I just talked to New York. I got kind of worried, and I..

Well, I didn’t talk to Glory, but Mignon said

she was leaving New York.

You’re wrong, Blacky. She’s leaving New York, alright

but she’s not coming here.

Well, what do you mean?

She’s going to California.

To California?

Yeah. I just got a wire from her mother

telling me to ship her trunks there.

Keep an eye on things till I get back, will you?

I’m hopping off for New York.

I’m Mr. Gorman.

Oh.

Hello, Blacky.

Have a cigarette.

No, thanks.

Well, do sit down.

You won’t believe it, but packing boxes

are very comfortable.

I came to see Glory.

Well, I didn’t flatter myself into thinking

that you made this trip to see me.

Glory will be here in a moment.

Blacky..

...you’ll find her quite grown up.

- She’s changed. - Yeah?

She’s learned a great deal in these past few months.

What are you trying to tell me, Mrs. Franklyn?

You made a mistake in coming here, Blacky.

What do you mean?

Glory’s not going back with you.

If you’ve been putting any ideas into her head, I’ll--

Blacky, you must be sensible.

We’ll arrange everything quietly

and you’ll give Glory what she wants

her freedom.

- Does Glory want that? - Yes.

I’ll believe it when she tells me.

(Glory) ’Hello, Blacky.’

Hello, half-pint.

Gee, honey, I’m glad to see you.

Don’t, Blacky, please.

I should have written to you, Blacky, and told you the truth.

I’m sorry I didn’t, but I just..

Well, I couldn’t, I guess. I didn’t want to hurt you.

You’ve been so sweet and maybe, well..

Blacky, I’m a coward.

I don’t get you, honey.

I didn’t have the courage to tell you that it’s all over.

But it isn’t. Can’t you see--

Oh, I can see. I can see how selfish I’ve been.

But, Blacky, you married the wrong kind of a girl.

- Oh, no, I didn’t, honey. - Yes, you did.

I found myself.

This is my life right here

with my friends and with my mother.

But that’s what you never liked.

I thought I didn’t like it, Blacky.

I thought it would be fun living in your bungalow

the rest of my life, but I was wrong.

Oh, it isn’t your fault.

You were very sweet.

You tried.

Then let’s give it another chance.

Come back for just a little while. We’ll try--

No, Blacky. It’s all over.

Well, what about the baby?

Blacky, your Dr. Jamieson was wrong.

Good evening, Mr. Gorman. You’re just in time for dinner.

Marge.

How did you know I’d be here?

I got word by Pony Express.

You better get in there and wash up.

I hardly know you with those singes in your hair.

Oh, Marge, you’re just trying to--

You seem to have forgotten where they do the washing.

It’s in there.

What’s the matter?

Mama’s little boy afraid of the dark?

Well, mama will take you right in

so the bogeyman won’t get you.

Here’s the water. There’s the soap.

And a nice, fresh towel.

Gee, honey, won’t you listen?

Sorry. The water’s making too much noise.

Honey, I don’t know what to say. I--

Well, for a guy who doesn’t know what to say

you’re certainly using plenty of words.

But...you know, I’ve been thinking

the last few weeks what a sap I’ve been.

Then I got thinking about you and--

And what a sap I’ve been.

But if you say that, Blacky Gorman

your life isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

Aw, gee, Marge, can’t you see what I’m trying to tell you?

I can see a lot of food getting cold

if you don’t park yourself at that table.

Oh, but I’ve got to tell you.

I know what you’re going to tell me.

Once upon a time, a knight rode away

on a cloud with a Princess.

But one day the Princess pulled the cloud out from under him

and he fell right smack dab on his..

Well, it’s a good thing he wasn’t wearing armor.

It’s funny how a good kick in the pants

will make a guy’s head work.

What the boy didn’t know was that the local Cinderella

loved him and she wanted him to be happy.

And, boy, is she happy.

Now will you go ahead and eat?

Gee.

That’s the best chicken pie I ever ate.