Original subtitles

It didn't work. I broke it again.

Damn!

G-Gotta keep trying...

Who goes there?!

What's going on? All this racket is obnoxious.

Oh Lady Ryoko!

We beg your pardon!

Stand aside. I'm going to take a look.

I'm afraid you can't!

We were strictly told not to allow anyone inside

while the Young Master is training!

Those were his orders!

Training?

Brother?!

What's the matter? Are you okay?

Oh dear brother...

You big dummy.

Young Master!

Hang in there!

He's not moving.

This is bad!

Get the medics in here!

Mendo's doing some kinda secret training?

That explains why he's been missing from school the past few days.

Yes.

Lady Ryoko tried to ascertain what he was doing out of concern but...

The Young Master passed out the instant he left the training room.

Passed out?

He must be doing some real hardcore training.

I see.

So that's why you were kind enough to come pay me a visit.

Are you doing okay?

Everybody's worried about you man.

Yeah right.

So this is how the rich eat!

Pass the tartar sauce would ya?

They look the exact opposite of worried.

Don't be ridiculous! We heard it was so bad you passed out!

What kind of training are you doing?

I really wanted to avoid anyone finding out about it.

But...

it's been over ten days since I started

and I have absolutely nothing to show for it.

It's just making me frustrated for being so weak!

Miss Lum!

Jeez Miss Lum! Are you even listening?!

Huh?

You're the only person I'll share the truth with Miss Lum.

This is my secret.

Are those jars?

For pickling something?

No.

This is the training I've been doing.

Wah! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

Yeah it's not working.

So you've been trying to cure your nyctophobia and claustrophobia?

Yes.

Sounds about effective as spitting in the wind.

I had no idea it bothered you so much.

Talk about pathetic.

Phobias are serious business.

You can't just get rid of them with silly crap like this dumbass.

Looks like an octopus trap.

Forget it.

All of my good looks money and power feel pointless next to such a damning flaw.

It's depressing.

Turn that frown upside down!

Yeah well I would have given up long ago

if I was born a commoner with a dumb face like yours.

Wah! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

Why not just visit your past

and get rid of whatever caused the phobia in the first place?

Wait that's actually possible?!

It's easy-peasy!

Say hello to my quasi-time machine!

H-Hold up. Are you sure that thing's safe?

Don't worry I fixed it after last time.

I guess this is good enough for now...

and off we go!

Ow that hurt...

What just happened?

I'm totally soaked.

We traveled back in time!

And you couldn't find a better spot for us to land?!

N-No way...

I recognize that fountain from my memories.

This is unbelievable.

How could it be so easy to travel through time?

Hooligans!

Wh-What do you want?

Is this clever little kid who I think he is...?

Omigosh! He must be!

His face looks way too mature for his age.

It's Shutaro!

Young Master!

Oh crud! It's the sunglasses squad!

What's troubling you?

Young Master!

These hooligans are trespassing! Capture them!

Dammit how did we not notice?!

Who are you people?!

Are you joking? You know exactly who I am!

We've never seen you before punk!

How dumb can he be?

Time to make a break for it.

Let go of me!

Kidnapper!

Jeez this brat is the opposite of cute.

How dare you!

Really? I think he's plenty cute.

I'll have you clobbered!

Listen twerp. We came here to help you so...

Silence you grubby commoner!

Hey! What have you done?!

Darn hooligans!

Wow. He's not crying.

Let me out of here!

That means he doesn't have any phobias yet.

I'm having you put to death!

Hey!

Don't be rough with him darling!

You can't coddle brats like this or they grow up to be assholes.

So I'm gonna straighten him out right now!

Yo Mendo!

Looks like you gave them the slip huh? Good job!

Poor little guy.

You must be so scared.

It's okay. Come here.

Shoo! Shoo!

Who ever said I needed pity from the likes of you?! Dirtbag!

Huh?!

Right? He's such a little stinker!

Don't hit him!

Oh jeez.

Cut it out already!

Wipe those tears little guy.

I'm going to keep you safe okay?

Ah you're perfect! I choose you to be my wife!

Gosh.

I'm not sure how to feel about that...

What did you just say?! You little wise-ass!

Darling! I told you not to be rough with him!

You're perfect! I choose you to be my wif—

Why did you hit him that time?

Huh?

I said why'd you hit him?

Huh?

This is messed up.

They're beating the crap out of a literal child.

Don't cry. Toughen up.

Hands off dirtbag!

I don't take any pleasure in being coddled by men!

You little shit! I'm a WOMAN!

What do you think you're doing?!

Friggin' hell! How'd you raise this kid to be such a little prick?!

It's not like I'm the one who raised him!

I'm just the adult who grew out of being this brat—

Uh I mean this little fella!

Whatever! Tell Ryu that you're sorry brat!

Be gentle with him!

Look out!

How incredibly rude.

No one bullies my dear brother and gets away with it.

Is that Ryoko?

Omigosh! She's adorable!

Ryoko? I'm surprised you'd come to my rescue.

Are you hurt?

Here. Get back on your feet.

I don't need your help!

Just kidding.

That was a fake arm?

Guess she was always like that even as a kid.

Ryoko. Pranks like that aren't very nice you know.

Have we met somewhere before?

It's me obviously! Can't you tell?!

I just realized...!

I have no idea who he is.

It would be best to ignore him my lady.

Hurry and call for backup already!

What are you even here for?!

Oh! That's right!

I'm so glad you're okay Dear Brother!

What was that for?!

Oh my! Sorry about that.

Come here.

Heave-ho!

Brother?

What's making you look so red in the face?

Unbelievable!

Can't you tell the difference between me and an octopus?!

I'm only kidding.

So you came out here just pull pranks on me?!

Not at all.

I feared that you might have forgotten something important about today.

Something important?

It's time to take these little guys for their walk.

You're in charge of looking after them today aren't you?

Life's pretty tough for you too huh kid?

It's all your fault hooligans! Take this!

You little turd!

Stupid brat!

This is what I get for saving you?!

Do you even realize who I am?!

You're gonna pay for that punk!

I'll make mincemeat out of you!

Wait a second Mendo!

Hurting your past self is a bad idea!

Don't try and stop me!

Yeah! We gotta cut this little shit down to size or he'll ruin society!

What did you just say?!

Brainless fools! You fell right into my trap!

Ouch that smarts!

Uh-oh...

Now they're in trouble.

Bury them!

Yessir!

W-W-W-Wait!

That's not even going to be the worst of your problems.

Darling...

We can't go out there and risk getting captured too.

Guess we just have to wait 'em out.

Wah! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

H-Hey! What the hell is this?!

You urchin!

Nobody treats the future head of the Mendo family

with such disrespect and gets away with it!

What are you even talking about?

You're the one who disrespected me!

Eat this!

Not bad.

Try this on for size!

Hey little fella. Let me help you out.

Huh?! How did you get free?!

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Okay hooligan. You've got some redeeming qualities.

Thanks!

Seems to be a commotion over at the mansion today huh?

I heard something about them catching trespassers.

Trespassing on the Mendo estate? Talk about a dumb ide—

Nobody's watching us right?

Oh shucks.

They're too big...

And totally not comfortable.

Stand over there.

Now we've got the perfect disguises.

I dunno about that.

Yo!

Keep up the good work.

Where do you suppose those two are?

Hey you three.

Come with me. I've got a job for you.

Whaddya think?

Running away would make us look suspicious.

Let's just follow him for now.

Hit up the barber next time that you get a day off.

Your hair's gotten too long.

Yessir.

Nice shooting sir.

Moroboshi! Have some shame dammit!

How can you roll over like a dog and switch sides like that?!

Take a look sir. Doesn't he look goofy?

What a dumb face!

Enough already!

Suck it up Mendo. This is part of my plan.

Huh?!

I'm just pretending to be on the brat's side.

Then we'll find a chance to escape.

So play along...

because I have to gain his full trust!

Sorry man! Forgive me!

Yeah right! Like I'm just going to believe that crap!

Seriously? You still can't tell what my real intent is?

Simon says look...

over there!

How about now? Did that convince you?

Don't hit him!

Where's the joker who hit me just now?!

It was all him sir.

You jackass!

That's gonna cost you!

You urchin! Are you trying to ruin my good looks?!

Ah Shutaro!

Having your share of fun again today I see!

Father! Mother!

You came just in time to see me punish this hooligan!

Hooligan?

Let me see.

Oh?

Do my eyes deceive me?

What does that mean?

Does he recognize me?

Are you the new tutor we hired?

No I'm your SON!

Huh?

He has a son that old?

No way. A kid born out of wedlock?

Yes milady. Of course.

"I demand an explanation dearest!"

...is what the matron of the house said.

It doesn't matter if I have a kid from the past.

Because you're the only woman I need in my life now honey.

Please believe me.

"Oh dearest my heart feels the same about you."

I love you.

Pardon me Master.

The young ones are watching.

Please take it to another room.

Oh! Good point.

Let's do that.

Bye Shutaro.

Don't let your antics get too out of hand.

Yessir!

Well hooligan.

Now the party really begins!

Young Master! The item you requested has just arrived!

No! Don't you dare!

Do it!

Wah!

It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

Stop! You're taking this too far!

So much for being sneaky.

More hooligans!

Capture them!

Hey! Go and capture them!

You're a dirty traitor!

Well duh.

It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

Look!

Come any closer and I light it up!

Sure! Go for it kiddo!

Are you nuts?!

Hurry and stop him!

Don't be naughty!

Here. Just let me take that okay?

I'm scared!

How about that.

All the training I did actually paid off in the end.

Holy crap. Breaking all those jars while he was training...

...ultimately gave him superhuman strength!

Yeah. That makes sense.

You jackasses.

You're gonna pay dearly for teaming up to torture me like that.

Take a chill pill Mendo!

I'LL BEAT YOU TO A PULP!

Crap. Now what?

M-Make for that room over there!

You brainless fools.

There's no point trying to hide.

I bet you're in here.

Where are you?!

Maybe this one.

This is bad.

He's totally gone off the deep end.

Over here sucker!

Woop!

Nice try!

Where are youuuuuu?

Must be this one!

Um Mendo?

You've done enough damage.

But I'm on the verge of finding them!

It's time for us to go home.

Please wait!

I'm just going to shatter every last one of these damn jars!

Take this!

He's awake!

Where am I?

We're back in the present.

Getting you here was a real pain in the ass.

Wait does that mean...?

Wah! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

Guess it didn't cure your phobias huh?

No surprise there.

We didn't even have time to find out what caused them.

That really sucks.

I thought this was my chance...

Young Master!

Where are you Young Master?!

I found him!

The Young Master is over here!

Poor kid. He's shaking like a leaf.

He must have been really terrorized.

Wah! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared! It's dark! It's cramped! I'm scared!

On the next episode of Urusei Yatsura.

I love you Big Brother!

WHACK!

Wretched

Shutaro!!

THWACK!

WHAM

WHAM

YANK

SMACK!

POW

POW

KERSMACK!

KAPOW!

SHOVE

KASPLOOOSH!

SPLAT!

SPLAT!

KA-KLING!

Meanwhile...

PSHEEEEEW

Meanwhile...

FWAP!

YAAAAANK

POW

ZIP!

POW

YAAAAANK

WHISPER

WHAM!

POW!

BAM! BAM!

Asuka Returns

A Stormy Date: Part 1