Original subtitles

Don't get that wrong with repair. We don't take off.

The answer is no.

Where are the girls, Major?

I got more to worry about.

I'd want this runway fixed, Jane.

Uh-uh.

If you think for one minute I let my girls land on this

pile of ant hills, pretend to be chorus girls. Just pretend.

What about the showgirls?

Which one is mine? Hi, fellas.

Either it's a show or a week off.

Poor little lambs who have lost our way.

Ba-ba-ba-ba.

The defeat of the Japanese in the Pacific.

Fighting and fighting hard is the key to victory.

Yet, when there's a lull in the action,

these battle-toughened veterans take every opportunity to play.

For recreation is as important to a fighting man as his weapon.

As soon as the shooting stops, and sometimes even before,

baseball games, boxing matches, even all-mail shows spring up out of nowhere,

displaying the ingenuity and spirit that characterizes Americans the world over.

Yes, America, if you have a husband, a father, or son in the Pacific,

rest assured he is in no need of entertainment.

Hey, watch this.

Let's go.

Oh, for crying on house.

Go again.

Yeah, same as yesterday, about a dozen Cates and Vals.

Almost put me into the trees.

I realized the runway was in pretty bad shape.

The rain and the Japanese had made it more dangerous than the Zeros.

And I wasn't the only one who felt that way.

All of us are gonna throw a shovel at our

shoulder, still a little patchwork of our own.

Physical labor?

That's right, boy.

We're on 24-hour intercept status for sector-covering

Ben-Gara and Dover, and the waterways in between.

VMF-819 was stationed on Ben-Gara,

but they were assigned daily patrol from the New Georgia sector,

which included La Cava, where we were stationed.

Now, as illogical as it may sound,

there were times when we were intercepting bombers heading for their base,

as they were performing the sector-covering ours.

It was kind of like being a paperboy,

but with your route on the other side of town.

Enemy bombers, eight o'clock.

K.D., take B-flight.

Start your attack 30 seconds after A-flight.

We got the altitude, so give this first one your best shot.

A-flight, follow my lead.

We turned back the attack on Ben-Gara.

Unfortunately, our own backyard was left wide open.

Sir, you better take a good look at that runway before you come.

What runway?

Well, I knew that strip was suffering.

We'll put it out of its misery.

What are we gonna do, Greg?

Well, according to my fuel Gauge, we don't have much choice.

I'll go in first.

Stick to the port side of the strip,

unless hulls are died there.

I watched the black sheep float down

with every finger and toe I had crossed for luck.

If one of them dropped a tire into a hole at 120 knots,

he'd cartwheel nose-to-tail down that runway

until it would take a blowtorch to separate him and his blue charger.

Then I ran out of luck.

Or rather, French did.

Are you through to runway? Let's go.

You okay? Yeah.

Come on, let's go away from sir.

Yeah, yeah, I'm not gonna take a purple arc because of some runway.

Let me look.

On the other hand, I got some pain.

Where's the spectrum?

Maybe internal bleeding.

Here, Ellie, you take it.

Come on.

I think you'll be okay.

Think so.

He was lucky.

There's some new spare parts ordered.

They don't wanna burn up.

Watch out, Quill.

Throw me some soap.

Game boy, game boy, come on.

Let's go.

Just my old heart good to see you college boys exercise your muscles like that.

Why don't you grab a shovel and give us a hand, Sarge.

Hey, if you wanna swap places, that's okay with me.

I got 19 planes over there waiting on your mechanical genius.

What do we got, Sarge?

Damn near empty bag of tricks, Major.

We got an endless parade of flat tires,

a couple more good shakes, and those bolts are gonna fall out of engines.

And the way it looks, they gonna get any better.

You're right, Greg.

We've been out here for six hours and we ain't fixed 20 feet.

It's the equipment we're using.

We might as well be at the beach building sandcass.

Damn it, I'm gonna play to expratos.

Who wants to be my wingman?

Does that mean we gotta fly off of this? Not you, Don.

The Marine Corps only logs direct one plane per week.

All right, who's my volunteer?

All right, Casey, let's go.

Well, I'd love to, Greg,

but I got a ton of messages down at the operation shack,

and I promised Bobby I'd help him warn she can't groove.

Yeah, that's right.

You can't all wait till after we come back for the freedom.

Yes, Major.

I am aware that TBFs are not worth much without torpedoes.

Now, I will do my best to personally find the shipment

that you were expecting and see that you get it.

All right? Goodbye.

The update on the enemy's subject here, sir.

Yes?

What?

Look, Lieutenant, I don't know where you are, but I'm in the middle of a war here,

and I don't have time to worry about a USO show.

Colonel Ardell, you're busy, sir, but I've got... Boynton, wait your turn.

All right, come on, don't just stand there.

Let's get things going.

BMF 214 reports the bombers attacking Bangara were successfully repulsed, sir.

BMF 819 reports they were unable to engage

the bombers attacking Vela-Lacava until it was too late.

All right, that's all.

Thank you, sir.

Look, uh, Greg, I know that it seems foolish to have the

819 protecting Lacava and the 214 flying intercept missions.

No, sir, not foolish.

Stupid.

That's not why I'm here, Colonel.

I'm here because if we don't get some CBS to fix our runway,

we won't be able to intercept anything, including, sir, a kite.

Look, will you hold all of my calls for at least ten minutes, please?

Now, look, Boynton, as soon as I can free up

a construction unit to repair your runway,

I will do it, and you will get your runway

repaired, and that may take as long as a week.

Now, it may take less, but it may take a week.

What is it, gentlemen?

That was General Moore you just hung up on, sir.

He's still there.

Hello, General.

Uh, yes, sir.

Now, that was me, sir.

Well, things were a little bit hectic in here, sir.

Yes, I did get a call from Lieutenant Walsh.

Yes, General.

Just a moment, sir.

Yes.

I will do that right away, sir.

I can't believe that they are sending a USO show into this beehive.

Colonel, we don't get that runway repaired.

We don't take off.

Now, wait a minute, Boynton.

You obviously can take off, or you couldn't be here.

Look, Boynton, I don't have time to worry about it right now.

If you can find a CB outfit out there someplace,

you can have it with my blessings.

Yes, sir.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong.

The Colonel just gave us his permission to let me amend that.

His blessing to go out and get a CB crew, is that right? Yes, he did.

You check the file, I'll watch the door.

I was able to track down several CB units from the informational arts file.

The closest was on the isle of more archiva in the rear area.

It was run by a chief petty officer named Miller Timmons.

According to the file, they were on a top priority job called Skyhook.

From the look of the area, no one was too concerned about when it got finished.

Go away.

We're looking for Chief Timmons.

Never heard of him.

Check down at the dock.

I sent a check down at the dock.

Are you Timmons?

Who's asking?

Major, Gregory Boynton.

We're from Bella LaCaba.

We've got an airstrip that needs some help.

You got orders, Major?

We need a couple dozers and a greater.

No orders.

We got the blessings of a bird colonel.

Yeah.

Oh, it's my exec officer, Larry Casey.

No orders, no work.

No, we got orders.

We got 12-year-old orders.

Comes in a bottle.

Could come in a couple cases.

Listen, Major, what we got here is a seller's market.

Now, for the last three weeks, I've been working with Admiral Bill Stapley.

He runs the base.

He and I got what you might call a working relationship.

He wants a cabana, he gets it.

I want scotch, I get it.

He wants a freshwater swimming pool, he gets it.

I want Polish sausage.

You get it.

So you see, Major, can't go wasting my time.

How about Bibles?

Gold inlay, solid black print, real thick.

Who is this guy? The chief.

That dozer looks pretty tired.

Now, just possibly, just possibly,

I may be able to get you a brand-new sexton harvester.

Brand-new.

Major, the next thing you're gonna be doing is offering me your courses.

And I don't need them either.

Now, if you'd have caught me before I hit this place,

I would have been more than interested.

But now I got it too good, you know what I mean? So long, Major.

Well, at least we won't be up to our navels and costumes and tassels.

Hey, Major.

Costumes and tassels.

Ah, it's just a figure of speech.

The only figure of a tassel goes around ain't speech.

Oh, no, it's a showgirl.

Showgirls? You got a U.

S.O. show coming to La Cada.

Dammit, Casey, that is classified information.

Uh, yeah, but Greg, if they can't go in

and we can't have a show, how can it be classified?

Can't land?

You know, you got a point there?

They can't land. It's not classified.

Yeah, we got showgirls coming to La Cada.

Well, why can't they land?

Tell you why they can't land.

You think I'm gonna risk landing a bunch of showgirls

on an airstrip where they got a 50-50 chance of crashing?

Well, why didn't your tummy was that bad?

I don't want to see anybody getting hurt.

Listen, Major, I could cut some T.D.Y.

orders and me and the boys will hop over there and fix that runway of yours.

You'd do that?

Sure, the Admiral won't miss me.

I just got through finishing his sauna.

That should be nice of you, Chief,

especially because of the fact that you can't see the show.

Huh?

Uh, it's, uh, for officers of staff rank and above only, yeah.

Well, that's what's so frustrating, being held on La Cada.

Yes, only there must be some kind of a show.

You know what I heard? Uh, forget it.

Hey, look, Major, you're the C.O. of La Cada.

You could work something out.

I haven't seen a broad in six months.

You got pole sausage?

I knew the minute I saw you in Colonel Larr's office yesterday

that you were someone I'd, uh, like to get to know.

Why is that?

Well, when there's a natural attraction between two people,

you did feel that magnetic pull.

Oh, just because I look at you more than two seconds,

there's magnetic pull.

Excuse me, wait a minute.

Now, if, uh, you didn't feel it, then I'm making a big mistake.

I'll just sign off.

No, wait.

I thought you were cute.

Cute? Cute.

Yeah, well, uh, okay.

Look, I, uh, think I can make it over to Espritos for that U.S.O. show.

Would you like to go with me? Maybe.

Uh, when's the show gonna be there?

Well, not for a couple of weeks, I'm afraid.

Half the troop is down with malaria.

A couple of weeks?

Well, is it me you want to see or the show?

Uh, uh, yes, uh, well, yes.

I, I, I'm sure I can work something out.

Uh, well, it, it's been very, very interesting, uh,

having our discussion about the New Testament, Sister Louisa.

I, uh, I'm looking for... Larry, I didn't know you were religious.

Well, uh, that was, uh, Sister Louisa.

She's our very old family friend. Very old.

Couple of weeks.

Couple of weeks isn't that old.

Ooh, hey, you call that a runway?

Air trans 1, stick to the north side of the field.

There are less holes there.

You can't prove it from up here.

Is that the CBS?

That should be them.

Greg? Greg? The U.

S. social coming into Espritos.

It's been shut down.

Uh, perhaps the troop came down with malaria.

They won't be here for a couple of weeks.

Swell.

Well, what are we gonna do?

We'll keep promising them.

I'll think of something later.

But Greg, do you want to end up buried at Chuckle?

Well, neither do I.

Worst comes to worst?

You can go a few rounds with Tim and his boys.

Yeah, but Pappy, but nothing.

There's 12 of them, there's 12 of us.

Now, how tough can that be?

I think we'd better figure a way how to deliver.

Yeah, that's for sure.

Hi, guys, welcome.

They are big.

How tough can it be, huh?

Hi.

See what I mean about our runway?

I don't see no birds.

I don't see any Polish sausage.

I don't see any Scotch.

Or, uh, two bolts of Chinese silk.

A case of imported olive oil, half a dozen bottles of Chianti.

Yeah, well, it's on the plane.

Well, we made a deal.

We sit right up front.

That's the deal.

Right.

Casey, Jeb, check it out.

Good.

Now, the worst part of the runway is over there.

Let me show you.

You won't believe this one.

Lieutenant Jeff Pruitt, you can call me Jeb.

Bert.

Bert, uh, you can call me Larry.

LST dropped off your equipment on the beach this morning.

We got a real problem here.

Yeah, I know, Chief, we got a problem, but... I'm sure you can fix it.

I ain't talking about this plowed deal.

Where are the girls, Major?

Or as you put it, the long-legged showgirls.

I got more to worry about than a brass hat USO shoulder.

I'd be wanting this runway fixed, James.

Greg, they brought everything as agreed.

Thanks. Thanks a lot, Captain.

And you're the guy who said that the show is gonna be here in 48 hours.

Yeah, right, right, tomorrow.

Hey, I don't know beans about USO shows,

but I do know that they don't just spring up overnight.

They got a half-stage equipment, and those

people that come first, what do you call them?

Uh, advancement.

Yeah, advancement.

Uh, well, they'll be here today.

Today?

Nothing's gonna lay on this runway today.

Uh, that was the other thing I had to tell you about, a, uh, Colonel Singer radioed,

and he and his advance people will be in later today.

What about the showgirls that they land tomorrow? Okay, Major.

Me and the guys will fix the worst of it,

but this here Colonel Singer... Hey, Singer, he better show up.

Don't worry about it, Chief.

Colonel Singer.

Uh, Mr. Singer was my, uh, my music teacher.

Well, I hope that Mr. Singer joined the Corps, Colonel Singer.

Long-legged showgirls.

He don't have much of a sense of humor, does he? Thank you.

All right, all right, all right.

Can you see anything yet?

See anything?

You've got to go through the whole bone.

You've got to go on a diet.

Give me a second.

Hurry up.

In case he catches us, he'll kill us.

Whoa!

You see anything?

No.

I'm not high enough.

Well, you've got to go on a diet.

Hey! Uh-oh.

Uh-oh.

What happened?

We're picking coconuts.

Bobby, you okay? Coconuts? Yeah.

For the kangaroo, he loves them.

Come on, Bobby.

Did you get a look? Bobby.

No, no.

Greg wants to sit you on the double.

Uh, yeah.

Well, uh... Okay, look.

He's groggy.

He's groggy.

He's like a Saint.

Anything for a little while.

I told him not to climb so high.

Oh!

Did you see her?

Huh?

Did you see her?

Did you see her?

Picking coconuts, huh? Coconuts, yeah.

Come on, I'll give you a coconut.

Why me?

Because you're the only pilot without a plane.

I'd expect a flight patrol on Boyle's lap.

Well, it won't work.

I don't know anything about U.S. Hoshos.

What was your imagination?

I don't care what you do, just as long as it works.

Yeah, well, I hate it.

But you'll love it.

No, I'll hate it.

Not done.

But I'll do it.

Good job.

Hey, Micklin.

Yeah.

I got a problem.

I need some help.

I'm up to my eyeball on your problem.

Well, I'm gonna help yourself, some of them.

Those Seabees arrived.

Oh, yeah? Where are they?

They're down at the beach. They're moving their equipment.

Then what's your problem?

Well, I promised them a U.S.O.

show if they'd fix the runway.

A U.S.O. show's coming here? Hot dog.

I ain't seen one of them since Pearl, I think it was.

I didn't say it was coming here.

I said I promised them one.

You got big trouble.

We got trouble.

But you know, we got enough people around here to put on a show.

I mean, we've got girls. We got equipment.

We got mechanics.

You got to screw loose if you think I'm gonna help you put on an idiotic show.

Did I say put one on? Did I say that?

We're not gonna put one on.

We're going to fake putting one on.

I got some sick birds.

I need half your mechanics.

For what? A course line? For manpower.

Now, you give me half your mechanics

and I'll have the black sheep work on their own birds today.

Yeah, just like you promised them Seabees a U.S.O. show.

Dan?

Yes, Arch?

Round up half the boys and go with the major here.

Oh, yes, Arch.

I better see them college boys on the flight line in 30 minutes.

That's what I better see.

Okay. Case is scotched. 12 years old.

If it's ready, I'll touch down in 10 minutes.

Roger.

Oh, hey, I got the R4D promotion.

You'll be here in about 10 minutes.

We got to move, okay?

Everything that didn't plug in or nail down.

Hold it. That's a scrambler. I need that.

We got a show to put on.

La Cava, La Cava. This is Red Dog One.

Enemy bombers heading for Bangara. Scramble, scramble.

Black sheep, Roger.

Somebody tell the Japanese that. Come on. Get a move.

Let's go.

By the time we were halfway to Bangara on the intercept,

we got word over the radio from Casey's buddy with the R4D

that he had picked up French and the mechanics without the Seabees being the wiser.

He intended to fly circles south of La Cava for an hour,

then come back in another aircraft carrying the advance party for the U.S.O.

It was a brilliant plan.

The only thing we didn't count on was the Japanese.

While we were turning back the bombers at Bangara,

their pals were paying a visit to La Cava.

I got it.

No, you don't. I got it.

I told you I got it.

I got it.

Not bad shooting.

Not bad. That's terrific shooting.

Terrific when you get a brace.

What are we shooting? Bezets are zeros.

Same difference.

We have an R4D on vinyl.

What are you laughing at?

That's the guy in your mouth.

You look just like Sergeant Ricklin.

Sir.

Stan, if you ever say that to me again,

I'm going to tie you to the tail of my Corsair and fly you over a ball.

Yes, sir.

Now, remember, the plane carrying the girls is scheduled to arrive tomorrow.

Say around, I don't know, an hour past sunset.

Hold on, everybody.

Who's flying this damn thing?

Hey, you think that's the advance people coming in?

Yeah, that's the end.

What the devil happened?

We got bombed again. That's what happened.

You with the USO? Colonel Singer.

Welcome to Vollacava, sir.

Welcome to what? This is a disaster area.

If I were scouting locations for an earthquake picture, I'd be delirious.

Stan? You know.

This is my aide, Master Sergeant Richards.

Master Sergeant? You do know.

This is Chief Timmons.

He's here to fix the runway.

Runway? You people call this a runway?

If you think for one minute I'd let my girls land on this pile of ant hills...

Girls? Girls are coming? Where are they?

Uh, well, right now they're on a plane out of

Hawaii, but I'm sending them back to Hawaii.

Why did I ever leave Sunset Boulevard?

You mean they're on a plane coming in now?

What's the ETA, Sergeant? ETA, yes.

One hour.

You hear that burn?

We got to get on a runway. The girls are coming.

What are you doing in Master Sergeant's drive phone?

I thought I'd call you tomorrow.

When I saw the runway, I knew 819 had let Tojo through again.

At least Timmons was on the job.

They kept wearing their dozers even as we landed.

If it weren't for those Seabees, I don't think any of us would have made it.

I was beginning to feel guilty about not having a USO show for them.

That is until Colonel Singer filled me in.

You told him that the girls would be here an hour.

I'm sorry, Major. Really. It's not your fault, Stan.

It's yours.

Mine?

You're the Colonel in command, aren't you, Colonel? I point it.

You bet I'm in command, Major.

And if that runway isn't fixed soon,

I'm going to chase your butt from here to Hollywood.

Runway's finished, Colonel.

What?

I want it until the bomb is headed again.

Yeah, or it rains again.

It rains every day in the South Pacific.

Well, it's good enough for the showgirls, right, Colonel? That's right.

You know something I like, you?

What is it, Timmons again? Yes, sir.

Yeah.

You know what I'm going to do for you, Timmons?

What's that, sir?

I'm going to make sure you get preferential treatment.

Yes, sir, preferential treatment.

Give us a beer, son.

Well, listen, Colonel, that plane will be here any minute.

I'd like to meet the girls.

Meet them?

Of course you're going to meet them.

And I'll introduce you to every single one of them myself.

Oh, that'll be great.

Especially Red.

Red? Yeah, Red.

She's going to love you.

And Twinkles.

Tell me about Twinkles.

Wait till you catch her act.

She's got this kangaroo jumping through hoops.

You've got to see it to believe it.

I'll take care of you, Timmons.

I'll take care of you.

Here's to it.

What are we going to do?

Beg.

No.

I'm not asking you to do anything unladylike.

I mean, what's wrong with just a little play acting?

No.

Susan.

The answer is no.

Nancy? Uh-uh.

I think it'd be fun.

Larry's always telling me I look like Rita Haywood.

Uh, Belly's got the spirit.

What's wrong with the rest of you girls?

What's wrong?

You want us to dress up like a bunch of

showgirls, sneak on a transport, fly around, land,

then do a fan dance for a bunch of gorillas?

No.

I didn't say a thing about a fan dance.

Only thing I said was just pretend to be chorus girls.

Just pretend.

Then what happens when the runway's finished and there's no show?

They'll come after us.

I think it'd be fun.

They won't come after you.

They're going to come after me.

And then what are you going to do?

Give them Colonel Singer.

Colonel Singer.

It took two cases of scotch to convince Casey's buddy

with the R4D to pull the same trick with our nurses

that he had done with French and the mechanics.

The runway was looking good.

But if Timmons didn't finish the job,

the rain would turn it into a fish farmer again.

So we had to keep the con going.

Which one are you going to introduce me to?

Uh, red or twinkles?

Uh, which one is mine?

Now, look, I didn't say anyone was anybody's.

All I said was that I'd introduce you.

I've got to control this, can I?

Bert?

He's a pussycat.

My dear, you never look lovelier.

Hi, thank you, honey.

Please, I'd like to introduce you to our base commander, Major Boyington.

Major?

How nice of you to dress for the occasion.

Or is it for a getaway?

Why, you're just a regular red Butler, honey.

Well, but where's the tassels?

How was your flight? It wasn't long.

It was only ten minutes.

I'd like you to meet Chief Timmons.

Chief Timmons, this is Red Ellie.

Hi, Chief.

Where's mine?

Twinkles, where's Twinkles?

Twinkles, come here.

I want you to meet one of the boys.

Bert.

Oh, no.

Don't hide behind me. He's yours.

Don't you think these girls are tired from a long flight?

We are exhausted.

Okay, girls.

Okay, may I have your attention, everybody, please?

Now, here's what's going to happen.

Now, I'm going to take you all over to your quarters,

and then we'll start rehearsals.

Rehearsals? Well, sure.

Just to familiarize yourselves with the stage area.

I mean, we've got no Hollywood Bowl here,

so I suggest you take showers because it'll perk you up,

so let's go, and then we'll rehearse, okay? Okay, come on.

Quick, white bunnies.

Chief, how about the runway?

When's the show?

You don't fix the runway. You don't see any show.

Well, I might never finish the runway.

Not the Japanese keep pounding holes.

Hey, that's not our fault.

It's your strip.

He's right.

I'm going to go to Expedals and straighten this out.

Come on, Casey.

Oh, great, great.

I'm not really hot about leaving Ellie here at those gorillas.

You've got the black sheep to protect her.

Oh, thanks a lot.

I'm glad to.

After all the trouble I went through to get Timmons to fix our runway,

I wasn't going to let an idiotic squadron rotation follow it up.

I'll give a damn how hard 819 is trying.

They're not trying hard enough, sir.

Well, the reason is because they were too far back.

Did we turn the bombers back from their field twice?

Yes, but they let the farmers through to our field twice.

Yes, but the fact... No, but, sir, we must protect our own field.

What do you mean? Okay.

He means we agree.

Now, look, give the colonel a second, and he'll explain it.

Go ahead, colonel.

Well, we finally figured out that the Japanese have been logging all of our patrols.

Now, they must have realized that you were flying

intercept status over the Benghara-Rendova sector.

Now, after only a couple of flights by the 819 over New Georgia,

it didn't take the Japanese long to figure out

that all they had to do was send in some decoy bombers.

Decoys?

Yes.

On a fake bombing raid over Benghara,

while the 819 was on the northernmost leg of its flight over New Georgia.

Now, while you were intercepting the decoys,

they sent in additional bombers in a real bombing raid over La Cava.

Now, naturally, the 819 was too far away to

intercept before they had plastered La Cava.

Naturally.

The point is that you're off intercept status.

I mean, you're free to protect your own home ground.

The Navy has moved the Lexington off of Benghara.

Our fighters will intercept any of the bombers

heading there while the 819 flies patrol.

Yes, sir. That's more like it.

You know you'd be pleased.

We better get going, sir. If they stick with pattern,

we'd be getting hit at 1600.

Oh, by the way, Greg,

I think we can give you that CB unit in a couple of days.

Oh, thanks, sir. We really appreciate that.

Oh. Well, anything at all.

Where's Ball? He's supposed to be helping you.

Ah, French took him. Something about needing a shill.

It's not that important.

Ain't nothing more important than my birds.

I can manage it, Sarge. I can manage it, Sarge.

You couldn't manage it with three of you.

Okay, you'll all get front seats, all right?

Okay, now, I got one ticket left.

Does anybody need a ticket?

Everybody's got a ticket. That's too bad.

Okay, I got one other item I forbid.

A garter.

Hey!

What do you think of that, huh?

Who's is that? Twinkles.

Just as long as it ain't Ellie's.

Guys, she's mine.

Here's what happens. Guys interact.

She slides this slowly down her long, creamy thighs,

flicks it with her dainty little toe out into the audience.

You see that?

What happens is the guy in the audience that catches it

is entitled to coffee in her tent after the show alone.

What happens if two guys show up at the same garter?

Well, I took care of that.

You see, this is the only official garter.

I mean, it says Twinkles here. You see it sewn in Twinkles?

See, I switched another one for the one she's got.

But that one doesn't have the name in it.

And believe me, she'll accept this one as the

real one, because it's got her name in it.

Now, what am I bid for this?

Ten bucks!

Twenty-five!

Thirty-five!

Forty-five!

Forty-five!

Sold to the gentleman for one dollar.

What do you mean, solo him for one dollar?

Last bid was a hundred bucks!

Does it tell him that?

What else you got?

Come on, what else you got?

I got a great idea, you guys.

We go watch the girls rehearse.

Hey!

Come back here!

Come back here!

As we let down Filicava, I couldn't believe my eyes.

There was our beautiful new runway

with the drainage ditch cut right across the middle and no sign of anyone working.

We can't land down there.

Ah, yes, we can.

Drag it in.

Let's down as close to the ditch as possible.

I think we can stop before we hit the trees.

You think?

Black Sheep won.

Espritos calling.

Couldn't raise your field.

Coastwatch reports enemy bond is heading your way.

Thirty minutes out.

Roger.

No choice, Lawrence.

We gotta land.

Now, get those little piggies high.

Now, let's see ya.

And step, kick, step, kick, step, kick,

step, kick, step, kick, step, kick.

No, no, no, no, girls.

Listen, you don't have it yet.

I told you, it's step, kick, step, kick.

Now, just a minute.

I'd like to step, kick him.

Yeah, and I know where.

I'm getting scared, you guys.

Oh, don't worry.

The big ones are harmless.

Sure.

He's probably a Teddy bear.

I'm some Teddy bear.

I think they're cute.

Okay.

Okay, now let's take it again.

And step, kick, step, kick, step, kick, step, kick.

I don't understand why you had us build a light tower, but it's finished, sir.

Did they finish the light tower? Yes, sir.

Okay, here's what I want you to do, Stan.

I want you to work these girls for five more minutes

and then send them to the showers, okay? Yes, sir.

Okay.

Keep up the good work, girls.

Keep up the good work.

Step, kick, step, kick, step, kick,

step, kick, step, kick, step, kick, kick.

Richards, get out of that course line and shut that damn thing off.

Yes, sir.

Why aren't they fixing the runway?

Um, we don't have a runway, sir, just a stage.

Our runway, our runway has a ditch in the middle of it.

That's for the drain pipe.

As soon as we fill it, your runway is fixed permanent.

Then why aren't you fixing it now, permanently?

You landed safely, didn't you?

We need more room to take off, chief.

Well, just as soon as rehearsal is over, we'll finish it.

The rehearsal is over, and there is no USO show.

What do you mean? What do you think we're watching? It's a con.

We conned you to get you to fix our runway.

Those girls are not dancers, they are our nurses,

and this idiot is my pilot.

Now, I got bombers coming down the slot,

and I can't take off because I have holes in my runway.

I want you to fill those holes with human bodies if you have to.

But fill them, and I will settle with you later.

Okay, Major, you're on.

Okay, guys, let's go. Let's move it out.

Ain't gonna be no show, come on.

Move it, let's go, everybody.

Come on, Stixie Cup, go, you big banana.

See you later.

Enemy bombers, four minutes out and closing.

We intercepted the enemy bombers 30 seconds off the end of the runway.

It was touch and go for a while, but we stopped.

And that was all that mattered.

At least until we got back down.

Stay out of this, Jim. I got Timmons.

What do you mean you got Timmons? You got big berths.

Bert, I can't even reach berths.

Let's just get on with it, huh? Wait a minute.

You promised us a show.

We will be right back.

I want a show.

There isn't gonna be any show.

They're nurses, remember?

They're beautiful.

Either it's a show or we go.

Wait a second, you guys, hold on.

We'll do the show.

But on one condition.

She's Betty Gravel, or more Anturna.

I didn't know we had so much talent in the outfit.

But then maybe the threat of losing all our teeth had something to do with it.

Boiled at a fair invitation to Sinatra.

Casey, Jeff and Brad?

Well, they were different as the Andrews sisters.

You think you got a better left hook than Joe Lloyd's?

Colonel Singer and Master Sergeant Richards were baffle reading Shakespeare.

Give me a torch, for I am not disampling being bent heavy on you.

Hey, gentle Romeo.

May I help you?

Get off!

Bring on that girl!

And me?

Well, I was the MC.

Thank you very much.

Now it gives me a great pleasure to introduce

to you the sensation of the South Pacific...

of little lambs.