Original subtitles

♪♪

♪ Sometimes, some crimes ♪

♪ Go slippin' through the cracks ♪

♪ But these two gumshoes ♪

♪ Are pickin' up the slack ♪

♪ There's no case too big ♪

♪ No case too small ♪

♪ When you need help, just call ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale's ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ No, no, it never fails ♪

♪ Once they're involved ♪

♪ Somehow whatever's wrong gets solved ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale's ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ No, no, it never fails ♪

♪ They'll take the clues ♪

♪ And find the wheres and whys and whos ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'N' Dale ♪

(humming)

Rule Britannia (laughs)

Yes, that's exactly what I plan to do.

Not only will I rule England,

but the whole world will be my oyster.

Please don't mention food.

A fortune in jewels awaits us, boys,

thanks to this secret map

that conveniently fell into my claws.

Gee, boss, uh, can I see?

Keep your paws off, Mole.

Don't ever let me see you so much as touch this artifact.

I just wanted a peek.

Golly, it's a good thing I installed

that smoke blower for nights like this.

How are we gonna find Fat Cat in all this fog?

No problem.

A river only goes one way, you know.

Don't be too sure there, mates.

The Zambooni river in Africa goes two ways

with eight lanes of traffic to boot. (chuckles)

Course, once you hit McLoubury...

Ship ahoy!

It's Fat Cat all right.

Dale: And he's a-headed for the Tower of London.

Chip: Rescue Rangers, away!

(wolf howls)

Wart: I don't like the looks of this place, Fat Cat.

It's very creepy.

Clam up and cut the line.

Up there, in the window!

Where? What?

Mepps: It's a ghost!

More likely one of the castle guards.

That's why this map is...

The map. Where's the map?

I don't see anything.

Oh, here it is, Fat Cat.

Fat Cat: The map.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to touch it.

(gasps)

Thanks for nothing, Mole.

Gee, you're welcome, Fat Cat.

Is it much further?

Quiet. You're distracting me.

(grunts)

Don't just stand there and look stupid.

Push!

(grunting)

This is hard work.

I'm surprised you recognized it.

Spread out!

Now, which way to the Crown Jewels?

But, boss, why don't we just go to the museum

like everyone else?

Yeah, why do we need a secret map

to find the Crown Jewel?

We're using a secret map

because I know a little secret about the jewels.

A secret? Oh, goodie! What is it?

If I told you...

(loudly) it wouldn't be a secret anymore, would it?

Now, follow me

and be quiet!

Oof!

Wart: Hey, who's the wise guy?

Yeah, cut it out, Mole.

(stammers) I... I didn't do anything.

Ow!

Then it was you! You...

Fat Cat: You blockheads.

Who started this?

It was a g-g-ghost!

Impossible. There's no such thing.

Just worry about the Rescue Rangers.

They always seem to show up and spoil my fun.

You sure this suction cup'll hold, Gadget?

Of course, Monty. It's been tested for up to 300 pounds.

Well, I think we're well under that.

(screaming)

Guess I must've put on a few ounces there.

Come on. We'll find Fat Cat by the Crown Jewels.

But where are we gonna find the jewels?

Chip: The Crown Jewels look pretty safe to me with all those guards.

Well, then what are we doing here?

Because they don't know about Fat Cat.

Hey, where are Monty and Zipper?

Monty: That's him, Zipper. Sir Colby,

one of me own ancestors.

Sir Colby risked life and limb

to keep the Crown Jewels of England safe

from cutthroats and thieves.

Why, he might've been the bravest mouse of them all.

Next to yours truly, of course. (Chuckles)

Monty: As I heard it, Sir Colby single-handedly stopped the Canterville Cat

from stealing the Crown Jewels.

This cat was a huge yellow beast

with smoke blowing from his nose and teeth as sharp as razors.

It's those blasted Rescue Rangers.

Rescue Rangers? Let me see.

Quiet! You want them to hear us?

Now that you mention it, no.

My turn. My turn.

Hey! Quit pushing!

Ow! Stop that!

Monty: Legend has it, that when the moon is full

and the night is still,

Sir Colby's ghost still walks the halls of the Tower.

G-g-g-g-ghost?

Ha! I'm just pulling your tail, mate.

There ain't no such animalesque.

- Mepps: Ow! - Mole: Ow!

Wart: That's my tail!

What was that? What was that?

It came from behind the painting.

Chip: Maybe there's a secret passage back there.

Mole: Ow!

(squeaks) What?

We've been spotted.

We'll have to get rid of them.

(Zipper squeaks)

What is it, Zipper? What did you see?

Dale: A beach ball!

A beach ball with claws.

(meowing)

Gadget: Fat Cat!

I knew it! He's behind that wall.

Chip: Spread out and look for a way in.

They're gettin' away!

Out of me way, mates.

We ain't got no time to shilly-shally.

It's a good thing they don't make 'em like that anymore.

(hollow knocking)

Sounds hollow over here.

Uh, any luck?

Not yet. Go look for trapdoors in the floor.

Ooooh!

Stop complaining, Dale.

We gotta find a way in.

You talkin' to me?

Oooooh!

(coughing)

(ghostly crying)

Hold it, Chipper. You hear that?

- (crying continues) - It's a...

But it couldn't be!

(crying)

I give up. I can't scare anything.

But you're...

You're a...

A coward.

You're the ghost of Sir Colby,

me ancestor!

You're the one who scared off the Canterville Cat.

Sorry to disappoint you, lad,

but it was the other way around.

He scared me into deserting my post.

You ran away?

And hid out in fear and shame.

Ever since then, I've been cursed to haunt the Tower.

(yelps)

Oh. (Stammers)

Is he gone?

This yellow-bellied liverwursted little mouse is...

a relative.

Well, I don't blame you for being upset.

As a ghost, I'm a total failure.

Colby: Why, I couldn't even scare away

those intruders in the secret passageway.

- He means... - Fat Cat.

And you're the only one who can help me!

Get a hold of yourself, Colby.

What can I do?

To break the curse,

a descendant must do a brave deed in my name.

A brave deed?

Why, you've come to the right mouse.

Brave deeds are Monterey Jack's specialty.

Just tell us how to get into that secret passage.

Well, it's been a while since I needed to use a secret door,

but the door to the secret passage is right behind this...

Oh, no! It's...

(screeches)

It's the ghost of the Canterville Cat!

He's come back!

(screeches)

N-n-n-n-now's your chance

to do a b-b-brave deed, Monterey.

Yeah, and get Sir Colby out of that curse.

(cat screeches)

Rescue Rangers away!

All: Monterey!

Look out!

(screeches)

(all sigh)

Monty: Is he g-gone?

I mean, is everybody safe?

We're fine, Monty, but are you okay?

Yeah, what happened to you?

Uh, well, I...

I was, uh...

A yellow-bellied, liverwursted coward?

Yeah. I mean, no.

I mean, I can handle cats,

most cats, anyway.

I can handle ghosts,

but a ghost cat...

I mean, it's just not human.

It's not even alive.

Now, Monty, you don't really believe in ghosts.

Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Colby, sir. I didn't mean to include you.

Oh, that's quite all right, my dear.

I haven't believed in myself for a long time either.

With that attitude, you'll never break the curse.

Too right, Chip.

If that ghost cat shows up again,

he'd better look out for old Monterey Jack.

I'll knock his block off. I...

I'll grab him by the tail and make him face the music.

You'll see, Gadget, love. Y...

Gadget?

- Chip: Gadget! - Dale: Come back!

Look out for the ghost cat!

Oh, he's long gone, and unfortunately,

so is his head.

We'd better get back to the Crown Jewels before Fat Cat does.

I know where they are. Follow me!

But... But the jewels are back, uh, th...

Oh, I forget. You can't float through walls.

We'll have to take another route.

Dale: But we saw the Crown Jewels back there in the museum.

Colby: (chuckles) Sorry, old chap, but those aren't the real Crown Jewels.

Dale: They're not?

Colby: I'm afraid not.

All glitter and all sparkle and all glass.

The real Crown Jewels are safely hidden in a secret room

at the top of one of the towers, you see.

Monty: Right, so Fat Cat's takin'

a secret route there to steal them.

Chip: Not if we get there first.

We're almost there. No turning back now.

You mean, we have to go all the way down there?

Gadget: Oh, Monty, it's just a long, dark, spooky old hallway.

Dale: Yeah, just the kinda place where you might run into a ghost cat.

Ghost cat? Where?

(clears throat) I mean, let me at him.

If there're any spooks to be spiked,

ol' Monterey Jack'll...

Yah!

All: Monterey, where are you?

Are you all right?

Hey, Dale, help me with this thing.

Okie dokie, Chipper.

Just leave me millions outside the door, okay?

Well, there they be,

the Crown Jewels of England.

(all exclaiming)

Look out below!

(laughing)

Hey, look at me.

(laughs) Who crowned you king?

It's like a fairyland.

Isn't this great, Monty?

Monty?

Golly, Monty,

what are you doing up there?

G-g-g-g-g-ghost cat!

All: Huh?

(screeching)

(all exclaiming)

You're on your own!

(growls)

I love to gobble down little rodents.

Canterville Cat: Come out, come out, wherever you are.

Yah!

I don't believe it.

Monty ran away.

You can come out, boys.

It's all over.

Aw, gee whiz, I was having fun.

It's getting hot in here.

Mepps: Watch it, Wart.

That's my feet you're stepping on.

(grunts)

You Rescue Rangers have bothered me for the last time.

Gather up the jewels, boys.

Fat Cat: I have plans for these rodents.

Welcome, Rescue Rangers, to your new play room,

(chuckles) the Tower dungeon.

Of course, this part of the dungeon

isn't on the regular tour. (chuckles)

So no one will disturb you for a very long time.

You're not gonna get away with...

Now, let me see. Where to begin?

The Rack?

Oh, no, no. That would be stretching things.

Hmm, the Iron Maiden.

No, no. Too large and too...

(shutters) Well, you get the point.

(gasp) I know.

The Crew Cutter.

A horrible little toy used to extract confessions from the guilty.

As the water slowly drips out,

the chopping blade is slowly lowered, until...

(imitates cutting sound)

Positively medieval.

Fat Cat: Well, I'm off for my reward.

Ta-ta, Rescue Rangers.

Now, don't go all to pieces too quickly.

(laughs)

Don't worry, guys. Monty will save us.

I hope.

(panting)

(whimpering)

What? What is it? Where?

Nothing, mate. I thought I saw a ghost.

- You did. - I did?

Of course. Me. Remember?

Oh, right.

Let's face it, mate.

I'm nothing but a shivering yellow-belly.

(sighs) Runs in the family.

I guess we're both under the same curse.

Colby: When I deserted my post, I let my friends down,

just like you did yours.

Me little pals.

They're in trouble!

Come on! I may be a yellow-belly,

but I'm still a Rescue Ranger!

Colby: Oh!

And this time, don't forget the sack,

and I mean a really big sack.

Yeah, yeah. Sheesh, what a grouch.

Hurry, mate. Me pals are in danger!

But what if we run into...

The ghost cat! (gasps)

You may be a cat, and you may be a ghost,

but you're also history.

This one's for you, Colby!

(screams)

(all grunting)

- Wart: They're not supposed to fight back! - Mepps: I'm leaving!

Yeah. Looks like he got the stuffing knocked out of him.

You stopped the Canterville Cat single-handed.

- Oh, it was nothing. - (squeaking)

I just looked him square in the...

Hey, Zip, cut it... What?

The dungeon?

Colby, you go up and take care of Fat Cat.

I've got friends to save.

But-but-but-but-but...

(coughing) I'm getting waterlogged.

Yes, but so is the leather strap.

Try stretching it.

Everybody twist.

No good. It's still not loose enough.

Hang on, mates! We're coming to the rescue!

Monterey!

I knew you'd make it!

Hurry! Get us out of here!

No cat's gonna keep me away!

(straining)

(grunting)

(straining)

Hurry before Fat Cat gets away!

Fat Cat: The Crown Jewels. Ha!

They're mine! All mine!

In the name of the Queen of England,

I command you to remove that crown.

Gladly.

Hey!

Perhaps you'd care to join your friends

in the torture chamber.

You wouldn't. You didn't.

You fiend!

Yah! (Babbles)

(stammers)

(screams)

Sir Colby!

(stammers)

(cheering)

You saved the Crown Jewels, Colby.

I couldn't have done it without your inspiration, lad.

I'm eternally grateful to you.

Oh, it was... nothing at all.

The curse is broken. I'm free!

Farewell, Rescue Rangers!

All: Good-bye!

Now, there goes one gutsy fella.

Where do you suppose he gets it, Monterey?

Takes after me, no doubt.