All language subtitles for The Flintstones S02E25 This is Your Lifesaver 1080p HMAX WEB-DL DDP2 0 H 264-PHOENiX_track3_[eng]

[theme music]

[whistle blowing]

screech

[siren blaring]

screech

vroom

crash

thud

slam

mwah

But I thought your boss promised you more money, Fred.

He did, he guaranteed me a raise

every five years if I did my job efficiently.

Uh-oh! He's got you by the loopholes.

Personally, I don't have anymore financial worries.

What do you mean you don't have any financial worries?

You owe everybody I owe.

Yeah, but I just borrowed enough money to pay off all my debts.

[laughing]

Well, I told Wilma how she can economize

and save 500 bucks a year on the grocery bill alone.

Oh, you gonna cut out your midnight raids on the icebox?

No, I'm gonna cancel the big food disposal unit

Wilma was expecting.

Her mother.

She eats like a seven-year locust

only she comes here every seven months.

You're lucky, Fred. Look at poor Harvey Boxite.

He's been married 12 years and his mother-in-law

only visited him once.

What's so bad about that?

She came the day after they was married, and never left.

[laughing]

Oh, here we are, at the new

George Washingstone Bridge, Fred.

Hey, uh, your turn to pay the toll.

You don't have to remind me. I have it all ready.

screech

[instrumental music]

crunch

ding

Speakin' of crocodiles, Fred.

How you gonna keep your mother-in-law

out of your castle?

- With a moat? - Ha-ha-ha.

I wish I could, but the old buzzard

probably swims like a duck.

Well, if you think she can swim

what about that guy who's gonna swim this river

with a 50 pound boulder tied around his neck?

- 'Huh?' - Ah-ha! A couple of live ones.

And about time. I was getting famished.

I say there!

Thank you for stopping, gentlemen.

I wonder if I could beg a boon of you.

- Oh, you want a bag of bones? - No, a boon. A favor.

Could I bother you for a light, for my last cigarette?

(Fred) 'Sure, I got a lighter right here in the car.'

Did I hear you say you're givin' up smokin'?

In a matter of speaking, yes. Uh, thank you.

I only need two reliable witnesses.

- For what? - Here, lad.

Hold this a moment, will you, my good man?

- Oh, my pleasure. - Thank you.

I don't wanna say anything to frighten this nut, Fred

but, uh, if he thinks he's gonna fly with this concrete yo-yo

he's gonna hurt himself.

No! Don't you get it?

It's one of those crazy TV stunts, like people are cuckoo.

And we're on the air right now.

- Hi, Wilma! - No, Fred.

- No hidden cameras in sight. - Hey, look, Barney.

He's diggin' through his briefcase for somethin'.

Oh, I know. He's an insurance salesman.

Oh, they'll do anything to get you to sign up.

Ah, here we are, gentlemen.

I wonder if you'd witness this for me.

See? Now don't sign till you

look at the fine print too, Fred.

Dear boy, I want you to read this too.

"I, J. Montague Gypsum, being of sound mind and body

do hereby, make known my last will and testament...to, to--"

To justly distribute my meager share in this cruel

but beautiful world, to deserving strangers.

To the children, I leave the birds and the flowers.

The banks of brooks and the golden sands

'beneath the silver waters there are.'

- Hey, that's nice. - Shh!

To the young lovers

I leave the soft summer nights

and the stars of the sky.

Sweet strains of music, ah.

Hey, uh, this is a long will, Fred.

Hold this rock for a while, will you?

Sure thing, Barney.

To married lovers I leave the fire side at night

the happy laughter of their children

'the company of good friends.'

Isn't it beautiful, Fred?

Yeah, it's, uh, your turn to hold the rock.

And to those no longer in their youth

I leave the vintage years and memories

so that they may live the golden days over and over

forever and ever.

- Hold this, Fred. - Sure, Barney.

[applauds]

Author, author! Come on, Fred, clap.

- Uh, hold this, Barney. - Sure, Fred.

[applauds]

Gee, Mr. Gypsum, that was beautiful.

Alas, dear comrades, I have nothing left.

That's why I'm perched here.

You mean you don't have a gimmick?

- You're really gonna jump? - Why not?

- 'Well, gee, pal..' - Did you say "pal?"

Oh, you don't know how long it's been since I heard those words

'mister, mister, uh..'

- Flintstone. Fred Flintstone. - Ah, yes!

Isn't it irony that one with such a hard name

should have such a soft heart?

- Well, goodbye, Ferdy. - The name's Fred.

- Goodbye, Burney. - Uh, the name's Barney.

Ah, ha-ha! I see your scheme.

You're trying to talk me into coming home with you.

- That's your game, isn't it? - Well, um, uh, not exactly.

You see, I already put my foot down

about my mother-in-law comin' to visit us.

Oh, you did right.

Never admit an outsider into your cherished family circle.

'It's like letting a camel put his head in your tent.'

Hey, he knows your mother-in-law, Fred.

No, friend. I know people.

I used to be a psychiatrist as well as a doctor

lawyer, and master chef.

- You were a chef? - 'Ah, yes.'

'Not just an ordinary chef.'

'I was captain of the Olympic cooking team.'

Tell me, what did you say we were having for dinner?

(Fred) 'Oh, brontosaurus burgers, I think.'

Not brontosaurus stroganoff with marinated mushrooms

and deviled dodo dumplings?

No, my wife doesn't cook fancy stuff like that.

I could teach her, especially my specialty

stegosaurus fins and sour cream.

Hey, I just got an idea.

Why don't you come home with me?

I thought you'd never ask.

You boys don't know what a weight

you've lifted off of my shoulders.

If a man has good friends..

...what does he need with money?

Sure, your worries are all water under the bridge now.

Right, pal?

swoosh

splash

thud

Some days you just can't help being a hero.

swoosh

crash

It was beautiful, Wilma. Just picture it.

Fred in a one and a half twistin' forward jackknife

ending in a full belly buster.

First time I ever saw anyone bounce off the water twice

before going under.

Well, he saved a life and that's something to be proud of.

Yeah. Uh, how are you feeling now, Fred?

Oh, fine.

[sneezing]

[mumbling]

- 'What'd he say, Barney?' - He said..

[mumbling]

I know, I know. But what does it mean?

Well, he never should've gone back in again

to save the darn hat of Mr. Gypsum's.

[mumbling]

Fred says, it seems to him that J. Montague Gypsum

is spending an awful long time in the tub.

Eh, what's he doing, steaming clams?

The poor man has had a shock.

A nice warm bath will relax him.

Help him to come out of his shell.

[Gypsum singing]

♪ There's no place like ho-ho-ho.. ♪♪

[Gypsum laughs]

Goodness! What's that?

That is the sound of a happy steamed clam

coming out of its shell.

(Gypsum) 'Oh, sorry, I took so long.'

But I did want to spruce up a bit for dinner.

I borrowed your robe and razor, Ferdy.

But I think we'll be needing some new blades.

[mumbling]

Fred feels terrible, Mr. Gypsum.

Well, if it's about my hat, forget it.

He gave it a gallant try. No hard feelings, old man.

I can always get another fedora.

[coughing]

Nasty cough. I don't like it.

Mrs. Flintstone, do you have cloves

hot mustard, honey, and a good strong wine?

Oh, are you gonna fix Fred a cough medicine?

(Gypsum) 'No, I thought I'd fix dinner.'

Have you ever had barbecued brontosaurus on brochette?

It's one of my specialties.

'I'd like to prepare it for you, if I may.'

It sounds delicious.

Well, take me to your larder. Get it?

[laughing]

[mumbling]

I feel the same way, Fred.

[instrumental music]

(Fred) 'Wilma, where's the sports section of the newspaper?'

(Wilma) 'I think Mr. Gypsum took it.'

(Fred) 'Wilma, where's the last bottle of Rocky Cola I was savin'?'

(Wilma) 'I think Montague took it.'

(Fred) 'Wilma, where's that magazine I was reading?'

(Wilma) 'I think Monty took it.'

(Fred) 'Oh, Wilma, where's that bottle of rat poison?'

(Wilma) 'Fred, you can't!'

(Fred) 'Well, he's taken everything else!'

Yes, sir, I always say a couple of good night's sleep

will straighten anybody out except you, Fred.

[mumbling]

'Gee, your eyes look like someone pried the covers'

'off two cans of red paint.'

'Hey, uh, didn't you get any sleep last night either?'

No.

'Oh, that's three nights runnin'. You got insomnia.'

- No, I got a house guest. - What's that gotta do with it?

Did you ever try sleeping on a rocking chair

without a safety belt?

How come you slept in a rocking chair?

Because, Wilma was sleepin' on the couch.

Well, how come Wilma was sleepin' on the couch?

Because J. Montague Gypsum

was sleeping in both our beds.

Both beds? How come?

Because J.M. Gypsum got a bad back

from sleepin' on the couch

so now he has to sleep on the bias across two beds

pushed together because Wilma feels sorry for him

and because I'm a big stupid nut!

Oh, but look on the bright side, Fred.

You're very fortunate havin'

an ex-doctor like him lookin' out for you.

He better look out for me.

My patience is beginnin' to wear thin.

Don't worry, Fred.

It'll take a long time

for any part of you to wear thin.

[laughing]

I feel so guilty, Wilma

playing badminton in the middle of the afternoon like this.

Me too, Betty. I should be cleaning house.

Nonsense, ladies. Work is the curse of the thinking class.

'You need to escape from drudgery.'

[yawning]

'It'd be nice if your husbands took you dancing'

'or to a concert in the park, or even to dinner.'

But I suppose they're too busy with their club meetings

and poker parties and bowling tournaments.

Too bad. Oh, well. Ready, girls?

- 'Ready.' - 'Ready.'

Okay, service.

You know, Wilma, Monty's right.

The boys ought to take us out more.

thud

See, that was a good one.

Of course, Barney always says he's tired.

Fred too. But they're never too tired to go bowling.

thud

Clean return.

And even if they were too tired to dance

they could take us to a concert sometime

and just sit and listen.

Fred gets tired if he sits too long, he says.

thud

Your point. Bravo!

And what's wrong with taking us

out to dinner once in a while?

Ouch!

Fred doesn't like to dress up.

He says it looks funny.

thud

Hey, that's smart.

Men!

What about those ridiculous large uniforms?

Now, cut that out!

Why don't we ask them to take us out to dinner tonight?

thud

They'll say they're too pooped.

thud

They're 20 years younger than Monty

'and look how peppy he is.'

thud

I bet Monty would take us out.

Yeah, if Fred gave him the money.

thud

Come on, lady. Watch it.

Why bother asking them?

Let's just plan to go out to dinner tonight without them.

Sure. Who needs them?

Who needs this? Goodbye!

I'm sorry, ladies. The bird flew the coop.

And that's just what we're going to do.

Yes, and thank you, Mr. Gypsum, for opening our cage.

Believe me, Barney.

Dinner just better be ready and on the table.

I'm with you, Fred.

[instrumental music]

None of that crazy mixed-up food that she makes for Gypsum.

Like jellied rock turtle and baked glacier.

I don't want my soup cold, my ice cream hot.

Ya hear me, Wilma?

[knocking on door]

Wilma! Open this door!

Please watch that knocking.

I've an upside down souffle in the oven

and you'll turn it right-side-up.

- I'll upside down you, Gypsum. - 'Temper, temper.'

Come on, open up or I'll..

[growling]

vroom

Uh-oh!

swoosh

vroom

crash

That's tellin' her, Fred.

[humming]

Alright. Alright, where's Wilma?

Oh, you're back, you left in such a hurry

I didn't have a chance to tell you.

Both of them left, mentioned something about

tired of being cooped up.

What did you say to Wilma? You made 'em leave. You did it.

What are you talking about, Ferdy?

(Fred) 'The name's Fred.'

'And I'm talking about my razor, my aftershave lotion'

'my smokes, my robe, my slippers'

and a whole case of Rocky Cola.

And when are you leaving? That's what I'm talking about.

Dear boy, you have to expect these little annoyances

when you have a house guest.

crack

I find you quite abominable too.

But let's make the best of it, shall we?

We're both in this together.

What do you mean both together?

(Gypsum) 'Don't you remember? You saved my life, Ferdy.'

The name's Fred. So, let's call it even.

You don't owe me anything.

Ah, but you owe me something.

I was perfectly willing to jump off that bridge

'and you stopped me.'

'Therefore my life is your responsibility.'

You mean, you're not ever gonna leave?

Why should I?

I've got food, shelter, and shaving lotion.

slurp

Everything I need, but a pinch of oregano.

Waddle down to the store and get me some, will you, Fred?

The name is Ferdy.

[instrumental music]

Hey, what are you gonna do now?

Let him get his own oregano.

He's done you a favor, Fred.

He's made you appreciate what a wonderful person

your mean, old mother-in-law is.

[laughing]

Ah-heh. Nothing could make me laugh, Barney.

Hey, look, Fred. There's an idea.

What idea?

(Barney) '"Sporting Goods" and "Hunters' Supplies."'

'Uh, let's look in the window.'

'"Spear With Telescopic Sight." Yay.'

'Sure like to have that, Fred.'

'And here's one of them new double barreled shot clubs.'

'Oh, boy, that's beautiful.'

'Hey, look, for real big game.'

'Wow, some equipment, huh, Fred?'

- So what? - Oh, uh, sorry, Fred.

Just trying to be helpful.

We'll have to think of something else.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Sure, Fred.

Hey, let's kill some time in the Aquarium.

I'm with you, Fred.

[bubbling]

"Man-eating Barracuspid. Do not feed."

'Yeah. Pretty fierce lookin', huh, Fred?'

(Fred) 'Hmm.'

(Barney) 'Fred?'

What do you think?

Nah, after seeing Gypsum tear up

ten pounds of stegosaurus steak Friday

I wouldn't give this fish an even chance with him.

Gee, Fred, I'm, uh, sorry I couldn't think of anything

to get rid of Gypsum.

That's okay, Barney.

He's my problem. I'm stuck with him.

Well, it's, uh, pretty late, Fred.

The girls oughta be back my now.

'Guess, I'll go home and get yelled at.'

- 'I'll see you, Fred.' - Goodnight, Barney.

(Wilma) 'Good morning.'

Oh, that, that you, Wilma?

Yes, Fred Flintstone. This is your wife, remember?

Where have you been all night?

Oh, just walking around, thinking.

Where'd you and Betty go? Did you have a nice time?

Awful. We missed you boys.

I'm sorry we ran out on you.

Really? Well, I'm sorry I yelled at you.

I don't remember your yelling at me.

Well, you weren't here, but I did.

[laughing]

(both) I'm sorry.

[laughing]

It's late. I've got your rocking chair made up for you.

Thanks, Wilma. The mystery guest asleep already?

He left an early call for 11:30 a.m.

- He's got to get to work early. - What?

'On a new crossword puzzle.'

I got a couple of cross words for him.

You know, Betty and I were thinking, Fred

and we think Monty is becoming a lot of trouble.

'Yeah.'

Something else, I don't wanna upset you.

'But we think Monty is a confidence man.'

- No. - Yep.

And we bet that if you had let him jump off that bridge

he wouldn't have jumped off that bridge

if you hadn't pushed him.

And we think Monty thinks

you think you owe him a living

'because you think you saved his miserable life.'

I think you're right.

So, we figured out a way to get even with him.

How?

'He's got to save your miserable life.'

'And then you don't owe him anything.'

Yeah.

[instrumental music]

But suppose he doesn't wanna save your miserable life, Fred?

Don't be silly.

Wilma's got it figured out that if anything happens to me

he loses his meal ticket, so he has to save me.

Hey, that's a pretty big rock to play with.

- Sounds dangerous to me. - Now, now, now.

I can get out of the way. There's no danger.

Not to you, to me.

I'm awfully shrimpy to be pushing all that weight.

No, I got it all figured out scientifically.

It's perfectly balanced, see?

'I even put an X right here where you nudge it.'

- Uh, just a nudge there, huh? - Right.

And then when the boulder gets rolling good

down into the gravel pit where I'm workin'--

Monty sees his meal ticket about to be canceled

and yells "Look out!"

Then I jump out of the way, Gypsum saved my life

we're even and I don't owe him a living anymore.

Now you have Montague up here

as the noon whistle blows, right?

Okay. Let's synchronize our sundials.

I got 10:35. What do you got?

A migraine headache.

I hope you're not just wasting my valuable time, friend.

Oh, no, Mr. Montague.

I thought you'd be interested in seeing

where your meal ticket, I mean, Fred works.

(Gypsum) Work nauseates me. I couldn't care less.

Well, right over is where you can see best, Monty.

You brought me all the way up here

just to look way down there?

Eh, you see all those tiny little dots that look like ants?

That big fat little dot is good old Fred.

I bet you'd have to yell pretty loud to have him hear you.

Yes, sir. Pretty loud.

That's what I said, "Pretty loud."

- What are you doing? - Uh, uh, push outs.

Uh, they're like push-ups. O-only out, uh, far out.

You, you know..

[grunting]

Everybody's doing them, you wanna help do a few?

[whistling]

The noon whistle. Good.

I think I'll go down and share my life partner's lunch.

- I'm hungry. - Mr. Monty, w-w-wait..

Uh, ah, ah, achoo!

Uh-oh.

[rumbling]

(Barney) 'Hey, Monty, when you get down there'

'tell Fred to get out of the way!'

Why, friend? Why?

Never mind. I see why!

He-e-elp!

Help! How do I get off this thing?

It's comin'. I hear it.

Come on, Monty boy, save my life.

(Gypsum) 'Look out, Ferdy. Look out!'

Yikes!

swoosh

Mr. Slate, Mr. Slate!

Flintstone! Cut out the horseplay during lunch hour.

Look out, boss. Look out!

swoosh

[instrumental music]

How do you stop it?

whee

thud

Hello? Hello?

[knocking]

Anybody home?

[mumbling]

Mr. Montague, that was the most amazing display

of self-sacrifice I've ever seen.

Rolling that huge boulder into that pit

to save the life of one of my employees.

I shan't ever forget it.

Nothing is too good for you, nothing.

Yep, we've heard the last of that good-for-nothin'.

The boss promised Monty a job

and a nice home to live in until he recovers.

[laughs]

Oh, boy! Slate will never get rid of him.

[knocking on door]

I'll get it.

Glad you're here, Flintstone.

I've always considered your little home the happiest I know.

And so, I give you today

the hero who saved your life.

'Eh, better be good to him, Fred.'

'You owe him your future.'

'I just made Gypsum your foreman.'

My for..

[mumbling]

Oh, I'm awfully sorry, Mr. Slate.

It's a shame we can't keep him.

But you see, we'll have no room

in our happy home for Mr. Gypsum.

'We're expecting an addition to our family very shortly.'

Why, Mrs. Flintstone.

'Fred didn't even tell me.'

She didn't even tell me.

I was keeping it as a surprise.

But soon there'll be another mouth to feed.

Hey, how about that?

Well, in that case, I'm sure Mr. Gypsum understands.

Don't you?

[gibbering]

Yes, he seems to comprehend.

I'll take him back to my house.

I'm sure he'll be no trouble.

He can sleep in my room until he gets to work.

Uh, sorry to have bothered you folks

and, uh, congratulations.

Wilma darling, is it true?

We're gonna have an addition to the family?

Another mouth to feed?

A chubby bundle of fun?

Yes, Fred. I just got the telegram this morning.

My mother is coming to visit us for a few months.

Congratulations, Fred.

Soon you're gonna have a little 209 pound stranger

runnin' your castle.

That's alright. Glad to have her.

You sure she won't be a thorn in your side, Fred?

So what? I'd sooner have that thorn in my side

than that pain-in-the-neck in my hair.

[laughs]

[theme music]

[yawns]

clink

thud

slam

Wilma!

[banging on door]

Wilma!

Come on, Wilma. Open this door!

Wilma!