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Will & Grace is recorded
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in front of a live studio audience.
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- Morning.
- Morning.
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00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:10,517
Do you like the new Grace Adler?
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00:00:10,551 --> 00:00:12,919
I'm putting her in the lobby
of the design union
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00:00:12,954 --> 00:00:14,221
to remind people to vote.
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Isn't that just an invitation
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for someone to draw a penis on it?
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Why do you diminish my efforts?
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Why do you diminish your thighs?
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Whose did you use? RuPaul?
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00:00:27,668 --> 00:00:30,203
Grace, did you eat all
of the almond butter?
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I just bought it.
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This really throws me off;
I had already calculated it
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00:00:34,142 --> 00:00:35,709
into my good fats for the day.
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What, am I supposed to eat
a coconut like a castaway?
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I don't know what to say.
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How about, "I'm sorry."
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Okay, okay.
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00:00:46,187 --> 00:00:48,155
- Well?
- What?
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00:00:48,189 --> 00:00:49,756
Aren't you going to say, I'm sorry?
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Oh, my God. How many times
do I have to apologize?
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How about once?
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00:00:54,695 --> 00:00:58,331
Will, can we just agree
that almond butter is stupid?
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Because no matter what you tell yourself,
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it's not peanut butter
and it never will be.
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Sorry I brought it up.
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Apology accepted.
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Hey, so, you know how I've
always been kind of psychic?
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Like a little queer-voyant?
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- No.
- See?
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I knew you were going to say that.
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So, after taking a short online course
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and proving that I'm not a robot,
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the good folks at The United
Community of Psychic People,
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00:01:25,860 --> 00:01:28,261
or UCPP, have welcomed...
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Oh, my God.
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UCPP!
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I just got that.
40
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Do you guys get it?
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- Mhm.
- Yeah.
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00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:43,944
Anyway, those guys have welcomed me
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into their community
of a certified psychic.
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There's no name written on there.
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Yeah, it costs $500
for them to put that on there.
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So, can I borrow...
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No.
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Now, I'm scaring myself.
49
00:02:03,264 --> 00:02:05,632
And, if you need a further demonstration,
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00:02:05,666 --> 00:02:09,469
Karen is gonna
walk through that door in 5...
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Now, honey?
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4,3,2,1.
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00:02:18,913 --> 00:02:20,554
Grace, I need a favor.
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Over here.
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Oh, right. The campaign.
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00:02:28,689 --> 00:02:31,802
But the resemblance is uncanny.
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But aren't you worried
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someone's gonna draw a penis on it?
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No! Why does everybody... Jack!
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Honey...
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Is it okay if I store
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a few things from my place at the office?
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00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:53,546
Um...
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00:02:53,581 --> 00:02:56,349
I've decided to sell the manse.
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- Really?
- I saw it in a vision.
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00:03:04,558 --> 00:03:08,295
Now that Rosario is gone
and with the divorce
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00:03:08,329 --> 00:03:10,030
there's just too many memories.
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00:03:10,064 --> 00:03:12,098
One of my favorite memories
is the time you and Stan were
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00:03:12,133 --> 00:03:15,535
being robbed and you wouldn't
let Rosario in the panic room
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00:03:15,569 --> 00:03:20,106
because it wasn't, in your
words, a "His-panic room."
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00:03:25,813 --> 00:03:29,749
I like to make life nice
for the working classes.
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00:03:30,484 --> 00:03:32,585
Right, middle class grace?
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00:03:35,022 --> 00:03:38,577
I'm sorry. Right, middle class Grace?
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Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com
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Would you look at that?
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00:03:53,941 --> 00:03:56,409
It's the bracelet Stan gave me
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00:03:56,444 --> 00:03:59,813
for eating one of my mini Prada bags.
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00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:03,518
He thought it was a taco.
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00:04:04,728 --> 00:04:07,354
Karen, I'm getting so many
vibrations from being around
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00:04:07,388 --> 00:04:09,399
all your old stuff.
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00:04:09,990 --> 00:04:11,624
Like this. Wow.
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00:04:11,659 --> 00:04:14,794
Hey, now that I'm a psychic,
could I rock a turban?
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00:04:14,829 --> 00:04:17,030
Honey, I'm really looking
forward to watching you
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00:04:17,064 --> 00:04:19,799
con poor people out of their money.
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00:04:20,468 --> 00:04:22,602
"Should I buy food or should I listen
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00:04:22,636 --> 00:04:25,905
to what this dum-dum
in a turban has to say?"
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00:04:27,241 --> 00:04:29,876
Karen, I have a real gift.
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00:04:29,910 --> 00:04:31,711
The only gift you have is the one
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where you clean yourself like a dog.
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It's the gift that keeps on giving,
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And receiving.
92
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:44,124
But Karen, I am telling you, I
am truly psychically connected.
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00:04:44,158 --> 00:04:47,694
Honey, I come from con man stock.
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My mother was a grifter.
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00:04:49,530 --> 00:04:52,532
My father was a flim-flam man,
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00:04:52,566 --> 00:04:55,153
when he wasn't governor of Oklahoma.
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00:04:57,405 --> 00:04:59,906
The only thing a fake psychic needs
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00:04:59,940 --> 00:05:02,809
is to find out what
their mark wants to hear
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00:05:02,843 --> 00:05:05,145
and then give it to them.
100
00:05:06,580 --> 00:05:10,984
Okay, okay, I'm sensing skepticism.
101
00:05:12,753 --> 00:05:16,990
Karen inspired me to finally
clean out the closet.
102
00:05:17,024 --> 00:05:19,159
Plus, it's raining
so I couldn't go running.
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00:05:19,193 --> 00:05:20,427
You never go running.
104
00:05:20,461 --> 00:05:22,764
I wasn't going to start in the rain.
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00:05:23,764 --> 00:05:25,999
You are not going
to believe what I found.
106
00:05:26,033 --> 00:05:29,836
Oh, Grace, you broke Garfield
off his base.
107
00:05:29,870 --> 00:05:32,872
Now it just says, "I love
lasagna," with no context.
108
00:05:32,907 --> 00:05:36,042
Because it makes a lot more
sense when a cat says it.
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00:05:37,111 --> 00:05:39,078
Can't you just say, "I'm sorry?"
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Okay, fine.
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00:05:42,659 --> 00:05:44,350
You actually have to say it.
112
00:05:44,385 --> 00:05:46,920
Oh, my God, you're relentless.
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00:05:47,955 --> 00:05:50,957
I found all the letters that we
wrote to each other in college.
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00:05:50,991 --> 00:05:52,625
Oh, yeah. You know, I actually...
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00:05:52,660 --> 00:05:55,028
I meant to organize those
for the archives.
116
00:05:55,062 --> 00:05:56,863
For when I was going to write my memoir.
117
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Oh, right, right,
and it had that weird title.
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Weird tit...
119
00:06:00,668 --> 00:06:03,903
"Homo with a Pie" is a great title,
120
00:06:03,938 --> 00:06:05,405
and when I get around to writing it
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00:06:05,439 --> 00:06:08,575
it's really gonna delve
into the complexities
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00:06:08,609 --> 00:06:10,210
of the gay experience in America,
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and at the end there'll be recipes.
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You know, for... for pie.
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00:06:17,685 --> 00:06:19,986
Okay, check this out.
Spring break freshman year.
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Mm-hmm.
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00:06:21,188 --> 00:06:23,723
Oh, my God I was so in love with you.
128
00:06:23,757 --> 00:06:25,716
Remember I was desperately
trying to get you
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to have sex with me?
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00:06:27,038 --> 00:06:29,596
Yeah, I was desperately
trying to avoid it.
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- Read the letter.
- Okay.
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"Hey, lover, I hate that our
schedules keep conflicting.
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"Will, there's something
I don't want anymore
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00:06:38,038 --> 00:06:41,574
"and I want you to take from me.
135
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"Wink wink. Read the back.
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00:06:43,811 --> 00:06:45,578
I'm talking about my virginity."
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Oh, no.
138
00:06:49,783 --> 00:06:51,918
Oh, I just want to reach back in time
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00:06:51,952 --> 00:06:53,753
and slap the dumb out of me.
140
00:06:53,787 --> 00:06:56,256
Hey, you think you're bummed, I'm a guy.
141
00:06:56,290 --> 00:06:58,925
"While I was giving possibly
my best performance of
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"'Trouble in River City, '
the whole time I was thinking
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00:07:01,195 --> 00:07:03,830
"'I wish I was in bed
making love to Grace, '
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00:07:03,864 --> 00:07:05,532
"with a capital G that rhymes with C
145
00:07:05,566 --> 00:07:07,000
"and that stands for 'coitus.'
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00:07:16,728 --> 00:07:18,862
Oooh, perfume.
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This seems very special indeed.
148
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:23,734
I'm gonna have to do a spray and step.
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Spray, delay, and walk away.
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00:07:32,711 --> 00:07:34,945
You know, Rosario gave me that perfume
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00:07:34,979 --> 00:07:37,114
because she thought that it would bring
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true love into my life.
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Her exact words were,
"This will cover up the stink
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"of the alcohol and then maybe
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you can trick a man into tolerating you."
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Ah.
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She was such a romantic.
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And then, sure enough,
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the very first time I wore it,
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I met Stan.
161
00:08:00,171 --> 00:08:01,590
You can toss it.
162
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:04,801
I'm never falling in love again.
163
00:08:06,277 --> 00:08:07,811
What? Why would you say that?
164
00:08:07,846 --> 00:08:10,080
Because I'm through with love.
165
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:12,783
I mean, sure, I'll have my needs met.
166
00:08:12,817 --> 00:08:14,885
The occasional rub and tug.
167
00:08:15,873 --> 00:08:17,640
The all night bang fest.
168
00:08:18,923 --> 00:08:21,276
A back alley bean twiddle.
169
00:08:23,595 --> 00:08:25,822
But as far as my heart goes...
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00:08:26,531 --> 00:08:27,965
it is closed.
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00:08:27,999 --> 00:08:30,768
Well, I hate hearing that Karen.
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You have so much love to give.
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00:08:32,670 --> 00:08:37,141
- All you need to do is just...
- Ba-ba-ba-ba-boo.
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00:08:37,175 --> 00:08:40,003
Go back to your fake magic tricks.
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00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,639
It's not fake, Karen!
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I can see your future.
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00:08:50,435 --> 00:08:53,742
I see romance, I see travel...
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00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,977
I see London.
179
00:08:56,828 --> 00:08:59,481
I see France...
180
00:09:00,565 --> 00:09:02,499
I see Karen's underpants.
181
00:09:02,534 --> 00:09:03,967
No, I'm just kidding.
182
00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,269
I know you go commando when it's raining.
183
00:09:05,303 --> 00:09:07,671
- Yeah.
- Okay.
184
00:09:07,705 --> 00:09:10,507
I do see love. I see happiness.
185
00:09:10,542 --> 00:09:12,342
Oh, save it for your next mark.
186
00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:14,111
Wait, wait.
187
00:09:15,213 --> 00:09:16,547
I'm fee...
188
00:09:16,581 --> 00:09:18,282
I'm feeling something strange, Karen.
189
00:09:18,316 --> 00:09:19,449
What?
190
00:09:19,484 --> 00:09:21,518
Oh, it's coming from in here.
191
00:09:23,655 --> 00:09:25,674
It's Rosario's jacket.
192
00:09:26,324 --> 00:09:28,826
Ooh.
193
00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:31,762
Check the pocket for scratchers.
194
00:09:38,903 --> 00:09:40,204
Hello, lady.
195
00:09:43,241 --> 00:09:44,541
Oh...
196
00:09:44,576 --> 00:09:46,210
- Ah.
- Choo.
197
00:09:46,244 --> 00:09:47,344
What just happened?
198
00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:48,979
I don't know.
199
00:09:49,013 --> 00:09:51,682
But honey, I think you might
have another gift
200
00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:54,285
besides squeaky clean balls.
201
00:09:57,388 --> 00:09:58,889
Uh oh.
202
00:09:58,923 --> 00:10:01,558
November 29th, 1985.
203
00:10:01,593 --> 00:10:03,260
The day after Thanksgiving.
204
00:10:03,294 --> 00:10:04,661
When I came out to you.
205
00:10:04,696 --> 00:10:07,764
Ugh, you ripped my heart out.
206
00:10:07,799 --> 00:10:10,167
It was like everything
I believed in was a lie.
207
00:10:10,201 --> 00:10:13,763
Even holding this in my hand
I feel like I wanna throw up.
208
00:10:14,372 --> 00:10:15,405
Should we read it?
209
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:20,061
That's a good sign, right?
210
00:10:22,113 --> 00:10:24,715
I can't totally explain it,
Karen, but it's like
211
00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:26,960
Rosario's all around me.
212
00:10:26,995 --> 00:10:28,737
She's in me...
213
00:10:29,061 --> 00:10:30,905
and then she's out of me.
214
00:10:31,731 --> 00:10:33,832
She's in me and then she's out of me.
215
00:10:33,866 --> 00:10:36,035
It's like our wedding night
all over again.
216
00:10:37,169 --> 00:10:41,473
Is she happy?
Does she like cleaning heaven?
217
00:10:44,043 --> 00:10:46,177
She says it's bigger than she thought...
218
00:10:46,212 --> 00:10:47,512
Oh.
219
00:10:47,546 --> 00:10:48,880
But they do let her take home
220
00:10:48,914 --> 00:10:50,884
leftover chicken and the recyclables.
221
00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:53,785
Does she have a message for me?
222
00:10:53,819 --> 00:10:55,153
- She does.
- She does.
223
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:56,521
Oh, this is interesting.
224
00:10:56,555 --> 00:10:59,190
Rosario says you're going
to find love again.
225
00:10:59,225 --> 00:11:01,026
That's crap.
226
00:11:01,060 --> 00:11:04,522
What did she break
into god's liquor cabinet?
227
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:07,832
Um, this is coming
from a disembodied ghost
228
00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:10,168
so, kinda think it's real.
229
00:11:10,202 --> 00:11:12,871
She doesn't know
what she's talking about.
230
00:11:12,905 --> 00:11:14,205
Uh-oh.
231
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,341
She did not like that.
232
00:11:16,375 --> 00:11:18,369
Why, what'd she say?
233
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,980
Rosario, I'm not going to tell her that.
234
00:11:22,014 --> 00:11:23,214
Well just tell me.
235
00:11:23,249 --> 00:11:24,215
She says you're gonna get mad.
236
00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:26,085
I'm not gonna get mad.
237
00:11:27,620 --> 00:11:29,821
- She says you're a quitter...
- Mm-hmm.
238
00:11:29,855 --> 00:11:32,390
She says you should put on that perfume
239
00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:35,126
and get your rich,
pampered ass back out there.
240
00:11:35,928 --> 00:11:39,631
She is not allowed
to talk to me that way!
241
00:11:40,299 --> 00:11:43,186
Even though she is dead, she's fired.
242
00:11:45,604 --> 00:11:46,771
What are you doing?
243
00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:48,373
She's coming through!
244
00:11:48,407 --> 00:11:49,941
- She's taking over.
- Oh!
245
00:11:49,975 --> 00:11:52,043
I'm losing myself!
246
00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:58,516
Well, there are a few things
247
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,852
I'd like to say to you, too.
248
00:12:01,754 --> 00:12:03,755
If you quit on love, you're a fool.
249
00:12:03,789 --> 00:12:06,191
- What the hell do you know...
- Listen, lady...
250
00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:10,729
...Sapphire earrings of mine
that you stole
251
00:12:10,763 --> 00:12:12,964
and then swallowed and passed
through your digestive track
252
00:12:12,998 --> 00:12:14,799
and you thought I wouldn't notice.
253
00:12:14,834 --> 00:12:17,702
Why do you think I have butler
stand outside the door
254
00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:19,771
with a pair of rubber gloves
on bathroom day.
255
00:12:19,805 --> 00:12:22,707
...Lid for every pot and that
means there's someone for you.
256
00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:25,061
Rosie.
257
00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:27,212
Do you really think so?
258
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,646
I do.
259
00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:31,359
Then I won't give up on love.
260
00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:33,718
I love you, Mami.
261
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,754
I love you too, Mami.
262
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:42,193
I miss those lips.
263
00:12:43,329 --> 00:12:44,462
- She's going.
- Oh, no.
264
00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:45,897
She's going.
265
00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:55,173
She's gone.
266
00:12:55,207 --> 00:12:58,476
Oh, no. Rosie, wait.
267
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,221
Rosie!
268
00:13:05,510 --> 00:13:07,210
Okay, let's set the scene.
269
00:13:07,245 --> 00:13:09,146
It's the day after I came out to you.
270
00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:12,649
I'm back at school wearing
a Clinique peel-off mask
271
00:13:12,683 --> 00:13:14,484
because of a stress pimple,
272
00:13:14,519 --> 00:13:17,954
and listening to our song over and over.
273
00:13:17,989 --> 00:13:19,356
How could I not see it?
274
00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:21,525
- Our song was Dancing Queen.
- Mm.
275
00:13:26,097 --> 00:13:27,798
This is a short one.
276
00:13:27,832 --> 00:13:30,033
"Grace, I'm so sorry.
277
00:13:30,460 --> 00:13:32,502
I'm just so sorry."
278
00:13:34,839 --> 00:13:37,340
- So sad.
- I know.
279
00:13:37,759 --> 00:13:40,844
And then I wrote you that big long one.
280
00:13:40,878 --> 00:13:42,012
Oof, huh?
281
00:13:42,046 --> 00:13:44,514
Yeah, I couldn't even open it.
282
00:13:44,549 --> 00:13:46,283
You di...
283
00:13:47,552 --> 00:13:48,685
You didn't read it?
284
00:13:48,719 --> 00:13:51,079
- No, I couldn't.
- Really?
285
00:13:51,114 --> 00:13:54,357
'Cause if I had gotten
a letter this thick
286
00:13:54,392 --> 00:13:57,894
scented in white diamonds,
I'd have been a little curious.
287
00:13:57,929 --> 00:14:00,931
Will, I was devastated.
288
00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:02,999
I mean, I even considered being a lesbian
289
00:14:03,034 --> 00:14:05,535
but women are a lot of work.
290
00:14:05,570 --> 00:14:07,037
I can't believe you're joking.
291
00:14:07,071 --> 00:14:08,538
I cried when I wrote this letter.
292
00:14:08,573 --> 00:14:12,042
You cried?
I think we know who was crying.
293
00:14:12,076 --> 00:14:15,078
But come on, we're good.
We got through it.
294
00:14:15,112 --> 00:14:16,780
You apologized.
295
00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:18,216
Yeah.
296
00:14:18,916 --> 00:14:20,550
Over and over again.
297
00:14:20,585 --> 00:14:21,685
What does that mean?
298
00:14:21,719 --> 00:14:23,086
We never talk about this
299
00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:25,255
but that's kind of our dynamic, isn't it?
300
00:14:25,289 --> 00:14:28,225
That I always say I'm sorry.
You never say it.
301
00:14:28,259 --> 00:14:30,060
It's like I'm constantly apologizing
302
00:14:30,094 --> 00:14:32,395
for the original sin of hurting you.
303
00:14:32,430 --> 00:14:34,264
- Okay, I...
- No, that's true. That's true.
304
00:14:34,298 --> 00:14:36,600
And you never have to apologize
because you're the victim.
305
00:14:36,634 --> 00:14:37,901
Oh, my God.
306
00:14:37,935 --> 00:14:39,803
Is this about your almond thing?
307
00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:41,447
I said I'm sorry.
308
00:14:41,939 --> 00:14:43,640
No, you didn't.
309
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:44,748
You never do.
310
00:14:44,782 --> 00:14:46,076
Why are you getting so mad
311
00:14:46,110 --> 00:14:47,911
about something that happened
a million years ago?
312
00:14:47,945 --> 00:14:49,412
'Cause you didn't read my letter.
313
00:14:49,447 --> 00:14:50,981
You didn't even think that maybe
314
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,816
I was going through something, too.
315
00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:54,251
Maybe I needed my best friend.
316
00:14:54,285 --> 00:14:55,785
Okay, fine. I'll read it.
317
00:14:55,820 --> 00:14:56,786
Give it to me.
318
00:14:56,821 --> 00:14:57,888
No.
319
00:14:57,922 --> 00:14:58,922
What do you mean, "no."
320
00:14:58,956 --> 00:15:00,690
You had your chance.
321
00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:05,262
No, no, no, no.
You're not going out there.
322
00:15:05,296 --> 00:15:06,874
- Aren't I?
- Nope.
323
00:15:06,909 --> 00:15:08,298
It is pouring rain and you are wearing
324
00:15:08,332 --> 00:15:10,500
your suede driving moccasins.
325
00:15:10,534 --> 00:15:13,136
I don't care.
326
00:15:13,170 --> 00:15:15,705
Okay, yes, I care. I care.
327
00:15:19,010 --> 00:15:20,911
You did not just do that.
328
00:15:20,945 --> 00:15:22,739
Oh, didn't I?
329
00:15:25,182 --> 00:15:28,485
The one time
he doesn't throw like a girl.
330
00:15:35,626 --> 00:15:36,793
Mrs. Timmer?
331
00:15:36,827 --> 00:15:38,628
Oh, there you are.
332
00:15:38,663 --> 00:15:41,131
I like your hat.
333
00:15:41,165 --> 00:15:43,036
It's a Duane Reade bag.
334
00:15:43,801 --> 00:15:45,678
Just take the compliment.
335
00:15:46,170 --> 00:15:49,306
Anyway, this envelope
landed on my terrace.
336
00:15:49,340 --> 00:15:51,474
Oh, God, I've been running
up and down the block
337
00:15:51,509 --> 00:15:52,685
looking for this.
338
00:15:53,511 --> 00:15:54,511
You opened it?
339
00:15:54,545 --> 00:15:56,773
How else could I have read it?
340
00:15:57,315 --> 00:15:59,349
Listen, doll, you should read it too.
341
00:15:59,383 --> 00:16:01,051
Without giving too much away,
342
00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:03,186
it explains why you and your husband
343
00:16:03,220 --> 00:16:05,364
don't have any children.
344
00:16:08,693 --> 00:16:10,794
Are you going to take Rosario's advice
345
00:16:10,828 --> 00:16:13,830
and spray on some of this
love potion Numero Nueve
346
00:16:13,864 --> 00:16:15,500
and get back out there?
347
00:16:16,067 --> 00:16:18,635
Yeah, maybe.
348
00:16:18,669 --> 00:16:19,836
I don't know.
349
00:16:19,870 --> 00:16:21,004
What do you mean you don't know?
350
00:16:21,038 --> 00:16:22,305
Didn't you hear Rosie?
351
00:16:22,340 --> 00:16:24,841
I did, but did I?
352
00:16:24,875 --> 00:16:27,344
I mean how do I know
that I wasn't just your mark
353
00:16:27,378 --> 00:16:30,180
and you weren't just telling me
what I wanted to hear.
354
00:16:30,214 --> 00:16:32,082
How can you say that?
355
00:16:32,116 --> 00:16:33,917
Are you telling me when you kissed me
356
00:16:33,951 --> 00:16:35,986
you didn't taste 409, Virginia Slims,
357
00:16:36,020 --> 00:16:38,022
and a little whiff of venison jerky?
358
00:16:39,523 --> 00:16:41,324
Well, the mind plays tricks.
359
00:16:41,359 --> 00:16:43,360
The lightning, the thunder,
360
00:16:43,394 --> 00:16:45,780
decades of hard drinking.
361
00:16:48,232 --> 00:16:49,566
It was a perfect storm.
362
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,286
But I'm telling you, she was here.
363
00:16:52,870 --> 00:16:54,337
Sure, honey.
364
00:16:54,372 --> 00:16:58,241
Well, I am saddened by your attitude.
365
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:05,248
Ye of big boobs and little faith.
366
00:17:17,094 --> 00:17:19,129
Okay, okay.
367
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:21,197
Message received.
368
00:17:21,232 --> 00:17:23,234
I'll keep trying.
369
00:17:23,567 --> 00:17:26,536
♪ Old black magic has me in its spell ♪
370
00:17:26,570 --> 00:17:30,974
♪ Old black magic
that you weave so well ♪
371
00:17:31,008 --> 00:17:33,977
♪ Those icy fingers
up and down my spine ♪
372
00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:38,615
♪ The same old witch craft
when your eyes meet mine ♪
373
00:17:38,649 --> 00:17:41,885
♪ The same old tingle
that I feel inside ♪
374
00:17:41,919 --> 00:17:45,955
♪ And then that elevator
starts it's ride ♪
375
00:17:45,990 --> 00:17:48,425
- ♪ Down
- ♪ Down and down I go
376
00:17:48,459 --> 00:17:50,260
♪ Around and around I go
377
00:17:50,294 --> 00:17:52,889
♪ Like a leaf caught in the tide ♪
378
00:18:04,129 --> 00:18:04,963
Grace?
379
00:18:04,997 --> 00:18:07,899
I'm the worst person in the world.
380
00:18:08,467 --> 00:18:09,767
I read your letter.
381
00:18:09,802 --> 00:18:10,868
Come on inside.
382
00:18:10,903 --> 00:18:12,870
I can't go inside.
383
00:18:12,905 --> 00:18:15,340
I don't deserve to go inside.
I'm horrible.
384
00:18:15,374 --> 00:18:17,108
Grace, if we never let horrible people
385
00:18:17,142 --> 00:18:19,874
in our apartment, we'd never see Karen.
386
00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,377
- That's true.
- Mm.
387
00:18:25,084 --> 00:18:28,219
How did I not read this letter?
388
00:18:28,253 --> 00:18:30,688
I mean, you went through
so much after you came out
389
00:18:30,723 --> 00:18:32,056
and I wasn't there for you.
390
00:18:32,091 --> 00:18:33,424
We don't have to talk about it.
391
00:18:33,459 --> 00:18:35,389
No, we do. I have to.
392
00:18:35,828 --> 00:18:37,228
You were tortured.
393
00:18:37,262 --> 00:18:40,394
And I never even thought about that.
394
00:18:40,799 --> 00:18:43,134
When I got to the part where you write,
395
00:18:43,168 --> 00:18:45,603
"Grace. I don't want to be gay.
396
00:18:45,638 --> 00:18:47,735
I just wish I was normal."
397
00:18:48,286 --> 00:18:49,862
Oh my god will.
398
00:18:50,488 --> 00:18:52,088
That broke my heart.
399
00:18:53,612 --> 00:18:54,946
And then the part where you said
400
00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:57,915
that you were thinking
about hurting yourself?
401
00:18:57,950 --> 00:18:59,580
I mean, is that true?
402
00:19:01,146 --> 00:19:02,458
Sweetie?
403
00:19:03,789 --> 00:19:05,419
It was a long time ago.
404
00:19:07,292 --> 00:19:08,506
Okay, look.
405
00:19:09,094 --> 00:19:10,962
This might be 30 years too late.
406
00:19:10,996 --> 00:19:14,679
But I just got smart in the last hour.
407
00:19:15,947 --> 00:19:18,582
You're right.
I didn't think about your pain.
408
00:19:18,607 --> 00:19:20,374
I only thought about mine,
409
00:19:20,472 --> 00:19:23,741
because that's the way
the story of the gay guy
410
00:19:23,776 --> 00:19:26,057
and the straight girl is always told.
411
00:19:26,091 --> 00:19:27,779
Isn't it?
412
00:19:27,813 --> 00:19:29,280
He broke her heart.
413
00:19:29,314 --> 00:19:31,149
Poor her.
414
00:19:31,183 --> 00:19:34,347
But you were just being who you are,
415
00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:35,787
and you were scared to death
416
00:19:35,821 --> 00:19:37,422
that the world was gonna find out
417
00:19:37,456 --> 00:19:38,995
and hate you for it.
418
00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,094
Wow.
419
00:19:43,128 --> 00:19:44,583
You did get smart.
420
00:19:45,670 --> 00:19:46,903
And you were right.
421
00:19:47,066 --> 00:19:50,134
It is why I never say I'm sorry.
422
00:19:50,169 --> 00:19:52,804
And I have been playing the victim.
423
00:19:52,838 --> 00:19:54,468
So...
424
00:19:55,574 --> 00:19:57,842
I am going to say it now.
425
00:19:59,712 --> 00:20:01,726
Doesn't it feel good?
426
00:20:10,155 --> 00:20:11,777
Still haven't said it.
427
00:20:12,858 --> 00:20:13,825
I didn't?
428
00:20:13,859 --> 00:20:17,161
Oh! I am sorry.
429
00:20:17,196 --> 00:20:19,030
I am sorry
430
00:20:19,064 --> 00:20:20,965
for not being there with you.
431
00:20:20,999 --> 00:20:22,500
I am sorry, Will.
432
00:20:22,534 --> 00:20:26,137
I am sorry for not being there
when you needed me most.
433
00:20:26,171 --> 00:20:28,339
And I am so, so sorry
434
00:20:28,373 --> 00:20:31,005
that I never said this to you before now.
435
00:20:31,603 --> 00:20:33,904
The fact that you are a gay man
436
00:20:33,929 --> 00:20:36,552
did not ruin my life.
437
00:20:37,116 --> 00:20:40,222
It made it so much better.
438
00:20:42,054 --> 00:20:43,517
Mine too.
439
00:20:51,130 --> 00:20:52,897
Did you really go to
a prostitute on Christmas?
440
00:20:52,931 --> 00:20:54,532
I couldn't go in.
441
00:20:54,566 --> 00:20:57,502
I just went to the House
of Pies and ate my feelings.
442
00:20:57,536 --> 00:20:59,537
Really, that was the inspiration
443
00:20:59,571 --> 00:21:01,506
for "Homo with a Pie."
444
00:21:02,241 --> 00:21:04,705
And you're gonna write that book one day.
445
00:21:05,277 --> 00:21:08,246
If I dedicate it to you will you read it?
446
00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:11,082
If by read it you mean skip
to the parts that are about me
447
00:21:11,116 --> 00:21:13,184
I will absolutely read it.
31220
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