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Ever wonder what it would be like
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00:00:01,398 --> 00:00:04,859
if your 11-year-old kid earned more
in a week than you do in a year.
3
00:00:04,969 --> 00:00:06,164
Welcome to my world!
4
00:00:06,230 --> 00:00:08,204
I'm Tony Carter, and this is
my house in Milton Keynes.
5
00:00:08,209 --> 00:00:09,769
The one with the yellow shed.
6
00:00:09,849 --> 00:00:11,840
That's where my son, Harry,
7
00:00:11,911 --> 00:00:14,577
came up with Honc, an app
to help him talk to girls.
8
00:00:14,702 --> 00:00:17,689
It used to be my shed.
Oh, I miss my shed!
9
00:00:17,879 --> 00:00:20,479
Anyway, I don't really
get social networking.
10
00:00:20,728 --> 00:00:21,597
- If I did,
- _
11
00:00:21,637 --> 00:00:22,884
I wouldn't drive a minibus for OAPs.
12
00:00:22,889 --> 00:00:25,611
But it seems to have gone massive.
13
00:00:25,944 --> 00:00:28,140
Harry still can't talk to girls, though!
14
00:00:28,249 --> 00:00:31,612
Now some big tech company
wants to pay millions for it.
15
00:00:31,801 --> 00:00:33,440
But will it change us?
16
00:00:33,768 --> 00:00:35,368
Nah!
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00:00:38,584 --> 00:00:43,309
18
00:00:43,557 --> 00:00:44,557
_
19
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:49,328
Let's talk!
20
00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:51,089
Ooh! Straight to the point!
21
00:00:51,169 --> 00:00:52,569
Super! Well...
22
00:00:52,649 --> 00:00:57,129
I think you will be
very interested in this.
23
00:00:57,209 --> 00:01:02,862
- Is that the money?
- No, it is our CEO, Mr Trent Zebriski,
24
00:01:02,940 --> 00:01:05,209
who would like to say
hi from California!
25
00:01:05,289 --> 00:01:12,464
MUSIC: "Also Sprach
Zarathustra" by Richard Strauss.
26
00:01:20,889 --> 00:01:22,929
Everybody dance now
27
00:01:23,009 --> 00:01:27,820
MUSIC: "Gonna Make You
Sweat" by C+C Music Factory.
28
00:01:29,894 --> 00:01:32,054
Everybody dance now
29
00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:35,032
Come on, everybody! Dance!
30
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Come on! There we go!
31
00:01:39,340 --> 00:01:41,220
Give me the music
32
00:01:43,431 --> 00:01:45,191
Give me the music
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00:01:46,205 --> 00:01:48,525
Everybody dance now...
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00:01:49,164 --> 00:01:51,907
Woo! Yeah! I like it!
35
00:01:52,034 --> 00:01:53,992
That's what I'm talking about!
Brett, take a note.
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00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:56,158
From now on, every single meeting
starts with a dance-off.
37
00:01:56,174 --> 00:01:57,145
On it, Trent.
38
00:01:57,150 --> 00:02:00,040
Carters, pleasure to meet you. Harry!
39
00:02:00,603 --> 00:02:03,017
(LAUGHS) Look at you, dude!
40
00:02:03,478 --> 00:02:05,963
When I saw Honc, wow!
41
00:02:06,221 --> 00:02:07,682
I was super-frigging stoked, man.
42
00:02:07,799 --> 00:02:10,768
And you invented it in your shed?!
That's phenomenal. What is that?
43
00:02:10,939 --> 00:02:12,666
Guys, what's a... (STATIC) shed?
44
00:02:12,689 --> 00:02:15,350
Er, it's a small garden building, sir.
45
00:02:15,429 --> 00:02:18,046
Used to house lawn-mowers,
rakes and hoes.
46
00:02:18,186 --> 00:02:19,135
Ho's in the garden?!
47
00:02:19,307 --> 00:02:21,789
Harry, I like how you roll, bro!
48
00:02:22,221 --> 00:02:24,170
So, what is the Honc story?
49
00:02:24,263 --> 00:02:26,098
He did it to talk to a girl he fancies!
50
00:02:26,122 --> 00:02:27,038
No, I didn't!
51
00:02:27,043 --> 00:02:28,643
We've all read your diary, love!
52
00:02:28,693 --> 00:02:30,075
(LAUGHS
53
00:02:32,824 --> 00:02:35,628
Wow! Love that, guys,
don't you? So fricking real!
54
00:02:35,706 --> 00:02:37,589
Take notes. That is real.
55
00:02:37,988 --> 00:02:40,599
So, Harry, Honc is the
future of social media.
56
00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:43,528
Facebook has been taken over by
moms, Twitter is full of trolls,
57
00:02:43,622 --> 00:02:44,224
but Honc...
58
00:02:44,290 --> 00:02:46,653
is just for kids. We're gonna make
it the biggest site in the world
59
00:02:46,714 --> 00:02:49,430
and you guys very rich.
60
00:02:50,016 --> 00:02:52,575
I'm afraid it's gonna take
a bit more than just...
61
00:02:54,427 --> 00:02:56,403
..ten million pounds?!
62
00:02:58,802 --> 00:03:03,770
63
00:03:03,952 --> 00:03:08,858
(THEME MUSIC)
64
00:03:29,425 --> 00:03:31,105
Ten million pounds?!
65
00:03:32,066 --> 00:03:33,426
Um...
66
00:03:34,744 --> 00:03:36,275
When will we get the money by?
67
00:03:36,385 --> 00:03:38,361
- The end of the week?
- I could get a PS4!
68
00:03:38,478 --> 00:03:40,671
- I could get my boobs done!
- I could get my hair cut!
69
00:03:40,781 --> 00:03:44,139
Wait. Wait a minute. Harry's
11. I mean, he's a smart lad,
70
00:03:44,201 --> 00:03:46,693
but he's not ready to be the boss
of a multi-million-pound company!
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00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:49,225
Don't worry about a thing.
See that big, giant head there?
72
00:03:49,256 --> 00:03:51,216
That is Oliver, right?
73
00:03:51,476 --> 00:03:53,396
He's gonna walk with you
every step of the way.
74
00:03:53,530 --> 00:03:55,890
He's a douche-bag, but he's
a whizz with business stuff.
75
00:03:55,947 --> 00:03:58,307
And the only one willing to
relocate to Milton Keynes!
76
00:03:58,403 --> 00:03:59,803
Right? Love that!
77
00:03:59,898 --> 00:04:02,578
So, Harry, what do you say, bro?
78
00:04:10,610 --> 00:04:13,170
(HIGH-PITCHED SQUEALS)
79
00:04:22,552 --> 00:04:26,232
The best things in life are free
80
00:04:27,505 --> 00:04:31,105
You can give it to the birds and bees
81
00:04:31,185 --> 00:04:32,625
I want money
82
00:04:32,705 --> 00:04:35,545
That's what I want
83
00:04:35,625 --> 00:04:36,788
That's all I want
84
00:04:36,863 --> 00:04:40,063
-
That's what I want
- _
85
00:04:40,198 --> 00:04:42,937
That's what I want...
86
00:04:43,023 --> 00:04:47,305
Guy Fawkes Night lighting
up time in T minus 11 hours.
87
00:04:47,385 --> 00:04:51,585
Bonfire goes up at seven and I
want you both ready to go at 25 to.
88
00:04:51,665 --> 00:04:54,065
Yes! Mum said I can squirt petrol on it.
89
00:04:54,145 --> 00:04:56,948
Oh? She can also take you to the
Burns Unit when your face is on fire.
90
00:04:57,026 --> 00:04:59,385
No-one cares about your bonfire, Tony,
91
00:04:59,642 --> 00:05:02,252
because I've found a firework
that's so incredible,
92
00:05:02,315 --> 00:05:04,205
it's banned in Holland!
93
00:05:04,383 --> 00:05:07,905
It's called the War-head!
And it was only 300 quid.
94
00:05:07,985 --> 00:05:11,352
We're not spending Harry's money!
It hasn't even arrived, yet!
95
00:05:11,453 --> 00:05:13,453
- What do you take me for?
- Wow! An espresso machine!
96
00:05:13,567 --> 00:05:14,567
That's nothing!
97
00:05:15,338 --> 00:05:16,953
- (DOORBELL)
- Get the door, Ellie.
98
00:05:17,140 --> 00:05:19,164
I don't mind buying a
nuclear firework, Dad.
99
00:05:19,282 --> 00:05:20,602
I know you don't, son.
100
00:05:20,696 --> 00:05:22,532
But I don't want you to.
101
00:05:22,641 --> 00:05:25,141
Nothing's gonna change just
cos you're a millionaire.
102
00:05:25,336 --> 00:05:27,825
Harry, Richard Branson for you.
103
00:05:27,905 --> 00:05:30,070
Just wants to say congrats!
104
00:05:30,110 --> 00:05:31,953
I can't talk to Richard Branson!
105
00:05:32,039 --> 00:05:34,335
Oh, Um... Yeah. He'll
call you back, Dick-Dick.
106
00:05:34,390 --> 00:05:37,119
He's right in the middle
of something... Alright.
107
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:41,272
Well, good morning, Carter family! Now,
108
00:05:41,335 --> 00:05:43,930
first things first. The sale of
Honc has all gone tickety-boo.
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00:05:43,969 --> 00:05:45,304
The money will be with you by
the end of the week.
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00:05:45,342 --> 00:05:46,118
Ker-ching!
111
00:05:46,307 --> 00:05:48,157
Secondly, there is a press
conference this afternoon
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00:05:48,204 --> 00:05:50,430
and Mr Zebriski is flying in especially.
113
00:05:50,548 --> 00:05:53,282
And he's rather keen on you all
coming back to London for it.
114
00:05:53,368 --> 00:05:54,180
Great!
115
00:05:54,227 --> 00:05:57,868
No chance. Harry's got school
and it's football this afternoon.
116
00:05:57,961 --> 00:05:59,961
I can miss football, Dad.
You've seen me play.
117
00:06:00,079 --> 00:06:01,034
You can get better!
118
00:06:01,229 --> 00:06:03,159
Oh, give up on that, Tone.
It's never gonna happen!
119
00:06:03,245 --> 00:06:07,145
And also, it is the Carter family
bonfire extravaganza tonight.
120
00:06:07,225 --> 00:06:10,225
I'm not cancelling it. I've
already bought the baked potatoes.
121
00:06:10,313 --> 00:06:11,596
- (MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY)
- What's that?
122
00:06:11,602 --> 00:06:14,979
Oh, I signed for it.
Somebody's bought ten iPads.
123
00:06:15,026 --> 00:06:17,585
Oh, I'll take that! It's
probably for next door.
124
00:06:19,927 --> 00:06:23,856
125
00:06:25,665 --> 00:06:27,422
Right. I've got to get to work.
126
00:06:27,508 --> 00:06:29,524
Drop me off here. I can
walk the rest of the way.
127
00:06:29,634 --> 00:06:32,434
Harry and Tasha sitting in a tree
128
00:06:32,945 --> 00:06:36,625
C-I-S-S-E-N-G!
129
00:06:37,364 --> 00:06:38,644
Shut up!
130
00:06:38,895 --> 00:06:41,135
Oh, so that's her, is it?
131
00:06:47,005 --> 00:06:49,036
My advice, pretend you don't like her.
132
00:06:49,505 --> 00:06:51,685
Dad, no-one does that any more!
133
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,878
Ah, when I wanted to chat your mum up,
134
00:06:54,128 --> 00:06:56,305
I just punched her on
the arm and ran away.
135
00:06:56,385 --> 00:06:57,800
And we met at work!
136
00:06:57,886 --> 00:07:00,545
This is exactly the
reason why I invented Honc.
137
00:07:04,717 --> 00:07:07,404
138
00:07:16,722 --> 00:07:18,745
OK. Are you all buckled up?
139
00:07:18,831 --> 00:07:21,602
So, what is this "We
Will Rock You" about?
140
00:07:21,682 --> 00:07:24,292
It's a musical about your
favourite type of chairs. Ooh!
141
00:07:24,386 --> 00:07:26,322
- Right, are we all on?
- ALL: Yes.
142
00:07:26,402 --> 00:07:28,802
Right, then let's go!
143
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:30,282
(ENGINE STARTS)
144
00:07:30,362 --> 00:07:33,842
Hold on! I've forgotten
my Kendal Mint Cake.
145
00:07:33,922 --> 00:07:35,602
(STOPS ENGINE)
146
00:07:35,682 --> 00:07:38,722
Are we there already? That
was quick! Thank you, driver!
147
00:07:38,802 --> 00:07:40,442
- Thank you!
- No!
148
00:07:40,522 --> 00:07:43,983
Sit down! Sit, Ethel, please. Thank you!
149
00:07:45,202 --> 00:07:46,764
What did you want to talk to me about?
150
00:07:46,825 --> 00:07:48,092
Ah, yes.
151
00:07:48,123 --> 00:07:51,762
It would be rather wonderful
if you and your family
152
00:07:51,842 --> 00:07:54,922
could attend the Honc
press launch this afternoon.
153
00:07:55,002 --> 00:07:56,802
Ah Well, we'd love to,
but you heard Tony.
154
00:07:56,882 --> 00:08:00,762
Oh, yes, absolutely. And I
completely respect his decision.
155
00:08:01,571 --> 00:08:04,682
It's just, if the press
launch were to go well,
156
00:08:04,762 --> 00:08:07,282
Harry could see the value
of his shares quadruple.
157
00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:09,842
We're not just talking
millions of pounds, Liz,
158
00:08:09,922 --> 00:08:11,842
we are talking hundreds of millions.
159
00:08:11,922 --> 00:08:14,242
So, I was wondering
160
00:08:14,322 --> 00:08:20,202
if perhaps Harry could
bunk off and come to London,
161
00:08:20,282 --> 00:08:24,242
and we could just not tell Tony.
162
00:08:25,442 --> 00:08:27,242
You want me to lie?
163
00:08:28,282 --> 00:08:31,562
You want me to deceive the man
I love? To go behind his back?
164
00:08:31,642 --> 00:08:34,282
- W-Well, I-I...
- No, no, I'm fine. I'm fine with it.
165
00:08:34,362 --> 00:08:36,842
Just wanted to make sure that
we're on the same page. Oh!
166
00:08:39,682 --> 00:08:41,202
Harry!
167
00:08:41,282 --> 00:08:44,242
- Oh, God, I can do this!
- (CRUNCH)
168
00:08:46,482 --> 00:08:50,602
- Good tackle, Jayden.
- Strong. Shut up.
169
00:08:59,762 --> 00:09:03,962
Harry. Llook! I'm in a helicopter!
170
00:09:04,042 --> 00:09:06,362
A bloody helicopter!
171
00:09:06,442 --> 00:09:08,242
Come and have a ride!
172
00:09:08,322 --> 00:09:10,042
Mum, what's going on?
173
00:09:10,122 --> 00:09:13,522
We're bunking off to go to
the press launch for Honc!
174
00:09:13,602 --> 00:09:17,368
I can't go like this! These
shorts are from Lost Property!
175
00:09:17,439 --> 00:09:18,439
Who cares?
176
00:09:18,482 --> 00:09:22,602
- We're going in a helicopter!
- What about Dad?
177
00:09:22,877 --> 00:09:25,637
We're going on a helicopter!
178
00:09:34,242 --> 00:09:36,642
You gonna touch the sky, baby girl
179
00:09:36,722 --> 00:09:39,842
Testify, come up in
the spot looking extra fly
180
00:09:41,082 --> 00:09:43,762
'Fore the day you die,
you gonna touch the sky
181
00:09:45,962 --> 00:09:48,802
Sky-high I'm I'm sky-high
182
00:09:48,882 --> 00:09:51,322
I'm I'm sky-high
183
00:09:51,402 --> 00:09:53,602
I'm I'm sky-high
184
00:09:53,682 --> 00:09:55,842
I'm I'm sky-high...
185
00:10:01,404 --> 00:10:03,524
Harry!
186
00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:07,083
Harry, my boy! It's
very good to see you!
187
00:10:08,010 --> 00:10:09,370
Ha-ha-ha!
188
00:10:09,724 --> 00:10:11,404
- Ladies!
- Hello!
189
00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:13,644
Mmm!
190
00:10:20,404 --> 00:10:23,271
You're so much taller
in real life, aren't you?
191
00:10:23,451 --> 00:10:27,284
Ha! That is literally the
funniest thing I've ever heard!
192
00:10:27,364 --> 00:10:31,004
Of course you remember Mr Zebriski,
the owner of Zebriski Tech!
193
00:10:31,084 --> 00:10:32,924
Love the way he says that!
194
00:10:33,004 --> 00:10:34,284
The "ohner"!
195
00:10:34,364 --> 00:10:36,084
Not quite, sir, it's "owner".
196
00:10:36,164 --> 00:10:37,924
- Ohner.
- Owner.
197
00:10:38,004 --> 00:10:39,804
- Ohna?
- Ow-Na!
198
00:10:39,884 --> 00:10:40,964
Ohna.
199
00:10:41,044 --> 00:10:42,804
- Owna.
- Ohna.
200
00:10:43,804 --> 00:10:46,444
Yes, that's absolutely
right, sir. Spot on!
201
00:10:46,524 --> 00:10:48,084
Nailed it!
202
00:10:51,204 --> 00:10:53,364
So, how was We Will Rock You?
203
00:10:53,444 --> 00:10:57,124
- Gayer than I thought it would be.
- I loved it!
204
00:10:57,204 --> 00:10:58,804
RADIO: 'In some more local news,
205
00:10:58,884 --> 00:11:02,084
'11-year-old schoolboy Harry
Carter is about to appear on stage
206
00:11:02,164 --> 00:11:04,044
'at a press conference
in central London.
207
00:11:04,124 --> 00:11:06,908
'The creator of social media app Honc
208
00:11:07,119 --> 00:11:10,515
will face questions from the press
about the acquisition of... '
209
00:11:10,804 --> 00:11:12,484
We're going the wrong way!
210
00:11:12,564 --> 00:11:14,124
Shush, Ethel. You're confused.
211
00:11:14,204 --> 00:11:16,764
'CEO and founder Trent
Zebriski kicks off proceedings.'
212
00:11:22,844 --> 00:11:27,004
Once upon a time in a land called
Milton "Keyness" there lived a boy.
213
00:11:27,084 --> 00:11:29,964
This boy had an idea.
214
00:11:30,044 --> 00:11:32,964
That idea... Was Honc.
215
00:11:33,804 --> 00:11:37,044
An idea so massive, it was
bursting to get out of his head.
216
00:11:37,124 --> 00:11:39,684
Until one day, it exploded.
217
00:11:39,764 --> 00:11:41,604
The idea, not his head!
218
00:11:41,684 --> 00:11:44,484
Ladies and gentlemen, Harry Carter!
219
00:11:44,564 --> 00:11:47,284
(CLAMOUR OF PRESS QUESTIONS)
220
00:11:55,604 --> 00:11:57,244
(WHISPERS) Please no! Please no!
221
00:11:57,324 --> 00:11:59,484
PRESS: Harry, how do you feel?
222
00:11:59,564 --> 00:12:01,324
- I don't believe this!
- 'Mrs Carter, '
223
00:12:01,404 --> 00:12:05,324
- you must be very proud.
- Yeah, very proud. Very proud of him.
224
00:12:05,404 --> 00:12:08,164
When Harry first started shutting
himself away on his computer,
225
00:12:08,244 --> 00:12:10,844
I thought like any parent
would. You know, "puberty".
226
00:12:10,924 --> 00:12:13,760
Which is interesting, actually, cos
he's quite a late developer.
227
00:12:13,773 --> 00:12:14,377
Mum!
228
00:12:14,486 --> 00:12:17,644
Unlike Ellie. She was in a trainer
bra by her ninth birthday!
229
00:12:17,724 --> 00:12:19,124
(UNDER HER BREATH) Please stop talking!
230
00:12:19,724 --> 00:12:21,884
PRESS: Harry, how do you
plan on spending the money?
231
00:12:21,964 --> 00:12:24,364
Three days I've been planning this!
232
00:12:25,964 --> 00:12:28,084
What are you looking at?
233
00:12:29,644 --> 00:12:32,004
(MUMBLES ANGRILY)
234
00:12:35,484 --> 00:12:37,324
What? What?!
235
00:12:37,404 --> 00:12:41,164
Who needs three kettles and five
iPods? The woman's out of control!
236
00:12:41,342 --> 00:12:44,107
237
00:12:45,215 --> 00:12:46,855
(LAUGHTER)
238
00:12:50,844 --> 00:12:54,484
- Been shopping?
- Shall we do the fireworks?
239
00:12:54,564 --> 00:12:56,684
Bonfire Night is cancelled.
240
00:12:56,764 --> 00:12:58,684
You clearly had better things to do(!)
241
00:12:58,764 --> 00:13:01,204
- Well, I can explain.
- Explain what?
242
00:13:01,284 --> 00:13:03,604
Why London's more important? Hmm?
243
00:13:03,684 --> 00:13:06,112
I specifically said
244
00:13:06,191 --> 00:13:08,479
that I didn't want Harry to
go to that press conference.
245
00:13:08,484 --> 00:13:10,324
And you went behind my back!
246
00:13:10,404 --> 00:13:12,644
Is this cos you didn't get
to go in the helicopter?
247
00:13:12,724 --> 00:13:14,444
Oh, don't be ridiculous!
248
00:13:14,524 --> 00:13:16,604
This is about our children's education.
249
00:13:16,684 --> 00:13:18,724
It's about honesty.
250
00:13:18,804 --> 00:13:21,124
And integrity. And trust.
251
00:13:21,204 --> 00:13:22,924
And respect.
252
00:13:23,004 --> 00:13:25,284
It is about the helicopter,
though, isn't it?
253
00:13:25,364 --> 00:13:26,849
Yes, it's about the helicopter!
254
00:13:26,908 --> 00:13:29,358
You know I always wanted
to go in a helicopter!
255
00:13:29,364 --> 00:13:31,357
We can go in a helicopter again, Dad.
256
00:13:31,456 --> 00:13:32,279
Well, you'll have a job.
257
00:13:32,284 --> 00:13:34,164
Cos you're grounded. All of you!
258
00:13:34,244 --> 00:13:35,604
Dad?
259
00:13:35,684 --> 00:13:38,404
- Er, sorry, am I also grounded?
- Yes.
260
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:40,324
Right. I think that's
technically kidnap.
261
00:13:40,404 --> 00:13:43,284
This is all your fault.
Let me tell you something,
262
00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:45,044
you big, posh,
toffee-nosed bell-end,
263
00:13:45,124 --> 00:13:47,844
we are proudly working class.
264
00:13:47,924 --> 00:13:49,524
Oh, not this again!
265
00:13:49,604 --> 00:13:52,764
We're middle class! We've been to Malta!
266
00:13:52,844 --> 00:13:55,244
- Yeah, camping!
- We live on a cul-de-sac!
267
00:13:55,324 --> 00:13:57,444
Which, interestingly,
means "bottom of the bag".
268
00:13:57,524 --> 00:14:01,444
- We're working class because we work.
- Well, I go to work!
269
00:14:01,524 --> 00:14:04,764
- It's a way of thinking!
- We've got ten iPads!
270
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,964
Not for much longer.
271
00:14:07,044 --> 00:14:09,204
Cos all of this is going back tomorrow.
272
00:14:09,284 --> 00:14:11,924
- Dad...
- I may not run a bank
273
00:14:12,004 --> 00:14:14,324
- or be an internet billionaire...
- Dad...
274
00:14:14,404 --> 00:14:17,727
But people rely on me, and
I don't let them down.
275
00:14:17,860 --> 00:14:19,279
- Dad!
- What?
276
00:14:19,364 --> 00:14:22,608
Sorry to bother you of an evening, Tony,
277
00:14:22,694 --> 00:14:24,959
but can we go back to the home, now?
278
00:14:24,964 --> 00:14:28,024
We think John's passed on!
279
00:14:29,814 --> 00:14:33,196
280
00:14:36,324 --> 00:14:38,524
MUM: I'm coming in to the room.
281
00:14:38,596 --> 00:14:40,236
I'm nearly in the room.
282
00:14:40,324 --> 00:14:41,594
I'm actually in the room.
283
00:14:41,655 --> 00:14:43,519
Mum, you don't need to keep doing that.
284
00:14:43,524 --> 00:14:45,964
- Well, you'll thank me, one day.
- What do you want?
285
00:14:46,044 --> 00:14:49,314
You know how you've always
been my favourite child?
286
00:14:49,403 --> 00:14:50,337
You want money?
287
00:14:50,407 --> 00:14:51,767
Well, I wouldn't normally ask,
288
00:14:51,838 --> 00:14:53,559
it's just that the immersion
heater's packed in.
289
00:14:53,564 --> 00:14:56,404
- We've got a combi boiler.
- Have we?
290
00:14:57,444 --> 00:14:59,604
OK, fine. I want a new sofa.
291
00:14:59,684 --> 00:15:01,724
Which I think, in many ways,
292
00:15:01,804 --> 00:15:03,684
is even more important
than hot running water.
293
00:15:03,764 --> 00:15:06,004
I told you, Mum, you
can have all the money.
294
00:15:06,084 --> 00:15:09,084
No, no, no. Me and
your dad discussed that
295
00:15:09,164 --> 00:15:11,604
and we feel that it's your
money and we shouldn't touch it
296
00:15:11,684 --> 00:15:13,964
which is brilliant, and
I'm really happy about that.
297
00:15:15,084 --> 00:15:16,633
- What were you looking at?
- Nothing.
298
00:15:16,728 --> 00:15:17,959
Was it naked lady bits?
299
00:15:17,972 --> 00:15:19,495
- No!
- Boy bits?
300
00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:20,520
Just leave!
301
00:15:20,564 --> 00:15:22,604
Harry, it's perfectly natural.
302
00:15:22,684 --> 00:15:24,403
Your dad's got a whole
drawer that I know...
303
00:15:24,426 --> 00:15:25,582
Mum!
304
00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,426
Make sure you wash your hands.
305
00:15:30,124 --> 00:15:31,844
(CLAMOUR OF VOICES)
306
00:15:31,924 --> 00:15:36,764
- Harry, can you lend me a fiver?
- Harry, can I have your autograph?
307
00:15:36,844 --> 00:15:39,044
- Snapchat me!
- Harry, you're so cute.
308
00:15:39,124 --> 00:15:40,804
Harry, be my friend on Facebook.
309
00:15:40,884 --> 00:15:42,644
- Harry, are you on Tinder?
- Harry...
310
00:15:42,724 --> 00:15:44,604
Alright, everyone, leave him alone.
311
00:15:44,684 --> 00:15:48,004
Off to registration, please.
I want to have a word.
312
00:15:48,084 --> 00:15:50,604
I'm sorry about the
helicopter, Mr Summers.
313
00:15:50,684 --> 00:15:53,244
- I can pay for a new football pitch.
- Oh, don't worry about that.
314
00:15:53,324 --> 00:15:56,364
It's only a bit of grass.
What this school really needs
315
00:15:56,444 --> 00:15:57,964
is a new staff room.
316
00:15:58,044 --> 00:16:01,604
You know, I've always liked you, Henry.
317
00:16:03,444 --> 00:16:06,604
Hi, Harry. Do you want to come
to the library after school
318
00:16:06,684 --> 00:16:08,484
and help me with my... homework?
319
00:16:10,484 --> 00:16:12,244
I'm going on a date with Natasha!
320
00:16:12,324 --> 00:16:14,484
Probably not. You're grounded, remember.
321
00:16:14,564 --> 00:16:16,164
Psst!
322
00:16:21,684 --> 00:16:23,684
A gift from Alan Sugar.
323
00:16:23,764 --> 00:16:27,164
No? Also, the Financial
Times would like an interview.
324
00:16:27,244 --> 00:16:30,244
- I've pencilled you in for Monday.
- Oliver! What are you doing?
325
00:16:30,324 --> 00:16:32,204
Oh, needs must, I'm afraid.
326
00:16:32,284 --> 00:16:35,364
The school won't let me on the
premises without a police check.
327
00:16:35,444 --> 00:16:37,084
I mean, ridiculous!
328
00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:39,004
Do I look like a paedophile?
329
00:16:40,317 --> 00:16:41,757
Yeah.
330
00:16:42,324 --> 00:16:45,524
Oh, very well. I'll meet you
at the school gates at 3:30.
331
00:16:45,604 --> 00:16:47,324
Yeah. That would be loads better.
332
00:16:47,404 --> 00:16:49,244
Is there anything you
need me to do for you?
333
00:16:49,324 --> 00:16:51,004
No, thanks.
334
00:16:51,084 --> 00:16:54,284
Actually, I need you to cover for me.
335
00:16:57,564 --> 00:17:00,764
Posh coffee? Posh coffee
from our new espresso machine?
336
00:17:00,844 --> 00:17:02,516
I'm surprised you haven't
bought a dishwasher.
337
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:04,079
- I've already got one.
- What?!
338
00:17:04,084 --> 00:17:07,244
- Ha-ha-ha!
- Oh! Oh, me, yeah. Very funny.
339
00:17:07,324 --> 00:17:09,844
Well, just for that,
you can do the dishes
340
00:17:09,924 --> 00:17:12,644
while I drink this.
341
00:17:12,724 --> 00:17:14,964
Can't be all that...
342
00:17:16,724 --> 00:17:18,044
Mmm!
343
00:17:20,524 --> 00:17:22,764
- Nice, isn't it?
- It's alright.
344
00:17:22,844 --> 00:17:25,324
I know you like it cos you're
making your special noises!
345
00:17:25,404 --> 00:17:26,288
I've had seven!
346
00:17:26,372 --> 00:17:28,359
- Is that why you dismantled the kettle?
- Mm.
347
00:17:28,365 --> 00:17:30,367
I just wanted something
to do with my hands.
348
00:17:30,405 --> 00:17:31,039
Liz...
349
00:17:31,044 --> 00:17:33,444
I don't like telling Harry
off. Do you think he's alright?
350
00:17:33,524 --> 00:17:36,524
Yeah, he's fine. He's just got a
lot going on. Shall we go for a run?
351
00:17:36,604 --> 00:17:39,324
- We never run any more!
- I'm gonna talk to him.
352
00:17:39,404 --> 00:17:41,164
OK, cool. I'm gonna go for a run.
353
00:17:41,244 --> 00:17:43,204
Liz, no more coffee!
354
00:17:43,284 --> 00:17:44,804
Yeah! OK!
355
00:17:44,884 --> 00:17:46,681
They put me in a dress
until the age of ten.
356
00:17:46,735 --> 00:17:48,199
Well, of course I was confused.
357
00:17:48,360 --> 00:17:50,120
Ah!
358
00:17:52,484 --> 00:17:56,244
- He's a terribly good listener!
- Where's Harry?
359
00:17:56,324 --> 00:17:58,404
I promised I wouldn't say.
360
00:17:59,604 --> 00:18:01,467
Here, let me help you.
361
00:18:01,569 --> 00:18:04,475
Oh, sorry! Didn't mean
to touch your hand!
362
00:18:04,522 --> 00:18:05,199
It's alright.
363
00:18:05,204 --> 00:18:06,884
Rich kid bothering you, Natasha?
364
00:18:06,964 --> 00:18:10,604
As you're here, you may as
well do my homework, as well!
365
00:18:11,844 --> 00:18:14,244
- Leave him alone!
- Who are you?
366
00:18:14,324 --> 00:18:16,844
Well, I'm his dad, thank you very much!
367
00:18:16,924 --> 00:18:19,994
You think it's OK to pick on him
just cos he's small and got eczema?
368
00:18:20,127 --> 00:18:22,564
No-one knows about the eczema, Dad!
369
00:18:23,804 --> 00:18:25,724
Really? I thought it
had spread up your back?
370
00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:27,404
(PUPILS LAUGH)
371
00:18:28,284 --> 00:18:30,844
There. I've done it. Please just go.
372
00:18:30,924 --> 00:18:32,484
Alright.
373
00:18:36,724 --> 00:18:38,484
Thanks a lot, Dad(!)
374
00:18:41,124 --> 00:18:45,244
- Harry, wait!
- Do you know how embarrassing you are?
375
00:18:45,324 --> 00:18:47,244
Yeah, I got a pretty good idea. Look,
376
00:18:47,324 --> 00:18:49,238
I only stepped in cos I
thought you needed some help.
377
00:18:49,333 --> 00:18:50,214
You know, sort him out.
378
00:18:50,246 --> 00:18:53,684
I already sorted him out. I put
a massive virus on his laptop.
379
00:18:53,764 --> 00:18:56,044
Wow! Things have really
changed since I was bullied!
380
00:18:56,124 --> 00:18:58,444
Harry. Harry!
381
00:18:58,524 --> 00:19:00,764
Look, I'm sorry.
382
00:19:00,844 --> 00:19:03,884
But it's not easy being
the father of a genius!
383
00:19:03,964 --> 00:19:07,244
And now with the money, and Honc,
384
00:19:07,324 --> 00:19:09,524
it's all a bit new to me.
385
00:19:09,604 --> 00:19:11,964
It's new to me, too, Dad.
386
00:19:12,044 --> 00:19:14,044
Sorry I missed firework night.
387
00:19:14,124 --> 00:19:17,244
It's alright. Maybe we can
do it again tonight, eh?
388
00:19:18,204 --> 00:19:20,564
Hi, boys! Was that Mum?
389
00:19:20,887 --> 00:19:23,684
390
00:19:29,656 --> 00:19:31,609
- Can we have some?
- Yeah, course you can!
391
00:19:31,703 --> 00:19:33,445
- No.
- I mean, no.
392
00:19:33,474 --> 00:19:34,759
If you want to get hammered,
393
00:19:34,764 --> 00:19:37,364
you can go up the pub with your
mates like a normal 16-year-old.
394
00:19:37,444 --> 00:19:39,172
Dad, do you think
395
00:19:39,207 --> 00:19:41,959
the face you've drawn on the
guy looks a bit like Oliver?
396
00:19:41,964 --> 00:19:44,764
- Somebody called?
- For crying out loud!
397
00:19:44,844 --> 00:19:47,924
Good gosh, that is the
very spit of my Uncle Byram,
398
00:19:48,004 --> 00:19:50,804
- who, ironically, died in a fire.
- Have you no home to go to?
399
00:19:50,884 --> 00:19:52,187
Uh, no, actually, no.
400
00:19:52,266 --> 00:19:54,239
I'm still saying at something
called a Travel Inn.
401
00:19:54,244 --> 00:19:58,244
Now, I appreciate we may have got
off on the wrong foot a little,
402
00:19:58,324 --> 00:20:00,268
so I come bearing a peace offering.
403
00:20:00,379 --> 00:20:01,580
What's this, then?
404
00:20:01,674 --> 00:20:03,026
This is confirmation
405
00:20:03,128 --> 00:20:05,439
that the money from Honc has been
transferred to your account.
406
00:20:05,444 --> 00:20:08,244
Congratulations! You are millionaires!
407
00:20:08,324 --> 00:20:10,731
But just so you know, this
is not gonna change us.
408
00:20:10,817 --> 00:20:13,644
Oh, come on, Tony! Let's celebrate!
409
00:20:13,724 --> 00:20:16,244
- Wa-ha-ha!
- See what I mean?
410
00:20:16,324 --> 00:20:20,964
And that's why I bought her... this!
411
00:20:21,034 --> 00:20:22,902
- The war-head!
- Yeah.
412
00:20:22,918 --> 00:20:24,439
I know I shouldn't have
after what I said.
413
00:20:24,444 --> 00:20:25,738
Oh, don't worry about it.
414
00:20:25,833 --> 00:20:29,033
I blew the last of our
savings on a racehorse.
415
00:20:29,412 --> 00:20:31,099
(LAUGHTER)
416
00:20:31,804 --> 00:20:34,204
- Woo!
- Rather phallic, one might say!
417
00:20:34,284 --> 00:20:36,404
Yeah, and it looks like a knob!
418
00:20:39,724 --> 00:20:41,244
Oh, wow!
419
00:20:41,324 --> 00:20:43,804
I think this might be
the best day of my life!
420
00:20:43,884 --> 00:20:45,564
What about the day you met me?
421
00:20:45,644 --> 00:20:48,164
Oh, don't spoil it, Tony!
422
00:20:48,244 --> 00:20:51,484
I am gonna so love being a millionaire!
423
00:20:51,766 --> 00:20:55,833
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