All language subtitles for Under.the.Vines.S03E01.720p.WEB.H264

You are absolutely the woman
I want in my life right now.

Married?

Not that it's any
of my business.

I'm widowed, actually.

- We're having twins.
- Twins? Oh.

Cut!

I just got offered the lead
in this massive series.

I'm going to LA.

What, he treats you
mean, keeps you keen,

and now he wants to take you
away from everything you love?

- Yeah, I'm going to LA.
- What?

Hey Gus, what am I doing?

Daisy... she's with
somebody, and I'm what?

You're giving her a choice.

5, 4...

I'm engaged.

I'm William. I'm an old
friend of Stanley's.

I came for Oakley.
I own half of it.

♪ There once was a
ship that put to sea ♪

♪ The name of the ship
was the Billy O'Tea ♪

♪ The winds blew up,
her bow dipped down ♪

♪ Oh, blow, my bully
boys, blow, ha! ♪

- ♪ Soon may the Wellerman come ♪
- Ugh!

♪ To bring us sugar
and tea and rum ♪

♪ One day, when the
tonguing is done ♪

♪ We'll take our leave and go ♪

♪ She'd not been two
weeks from shore ♪

♪ When down on her
a right whale bore ♪

♪ The captain called
all hands and swore ♪

♪ He'd take that whale in tow ♪

♪ Soon may the Wellerman come ♪

♪ To bring us sugar
and tea and rum ♪

♪ One day, when the
tonguing is done ♪

- ♪ We'll take our leave and go ♪
- Vic!

♪ Before the boat
had hit the water ♪

Oh, hi there. Would you like to
donate to a charitable cause?

♪ All hands to the side,
harpooned and fought her ♪

♪ When she dived down low ♪

♪ Soon may the Wellerman come ♪

♪ To bring the sugar
and tea and rum ♪

♪ One day, when the
tonguing is done ♪

♪ We'll take our
leave and go ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-
da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Let it breathe, if it doesn't
breathe, it's gonna die ♪

♪ Let us see, if you let
it be, is it gonna fly? ♪

♪ Set it free ♪

♪ And if it leaves
we say goodbye ♪

♪ The web we weave
and then we grieve ♪

♪ And then we cry ♪

♪ I want to tell you
before I forget ♪

♪ Despite the darkness ♪

♪ Some of these days ♪

♪ Wintergreen can't
outshine your radiance ♪

♪ Wintergreen I love
you more than anything ♪

♪ Wintergreen despite
the darkness ♪

♪ Some of these days ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Soon may the Wellerman come ♪

♪ To bring us sugar
and tea and rum ♪

♪ One day, when the
tonguing is done ♪

♪ We'll take our
leave and go ♪

Ahoy, Oakley Wines!

Oh.

I've made pancakes.

Uh, you really don't need
to make us breakfast,

William.

Well, you say that
every morning.

Yes, I do. And still
you continue to do it.

Morning meeting.

I think it's time to accelerate
the idea of a new cellar door.

Oh.

As Daisy and I have told
you many times, William,

we already have a tasting room
which is perfectly serviceable

and there is no need to spend
time or money on a new one.

Yes, William,

I think what Louis
is trying to say

is that while we appreciate all
the work you've been doing...

I'm simply towing my
fair share of the load.

Yes.

We just worry that you're
putting in a lot of effort

for something that you don't
really have a stake in.

Legally speaking.

"Legally speaking".
You're a card, Louis.

Now, would you like maple
syrup with those pancakes?

- No thanks.
- Uh, I will.

Thank you, William.

What?

He made his pancakes
pretty good.

Daisy.

You know, I don't think
I'm gonna make it.

Come on, Louis. It's two days.

Two days, and then
we'll be free of him.

It's that bloody
"Wellerman" song.

It's borrowed right
into my brain.

I don't think I'll ever be free.

Well, I could always
Rickroll you tonight.

- What?
- Rickroll.

You know, Rick Astley.

♪ Never gonna give you up ♪

- Oh.
- Yeah, never mind.

There are other things
we need to talk about.

I still say it might
be weight gain.

Come on, Louis.

You know Tippy's pregnant.

I know Tippy's pregnant.
Tippy knows Tippy's pregnant.

It's just, why hasn't she
told us she's pregnant?

Well, there's obviously a reason

she's not talking
to us about it.

Yeah, well, probably because
she thinks the future

of Oakley hinges on her.

- It does.
- Yes,

but, you know, we need to let
her know that she's family first

and a vintner second.

Yeah.

I'd say about equal
on both fronts.

No, Louis, this is important.

Look, when Tippy's
ready to talk, she will.

Right now, we need
to concentrate

on the more pressing
problem at hand,

which is getting rid of bloody
William, the bloody Wellerman.

And our case is looking
as tight as a drum.

Really?

Now, if I may begin.

Now, shouldn't you address me
as Your Honor or something?

Uh, I could, but technically
it's just a mediation.

We won't actually be appearing
before a judge, but, um...

You sure you don't
want to pop down?

Oh, no. I quite like
it up here. Proceed.

Mr. William McCallum is
an inveterate gambler.

Ah.

In fact, his entire
case is a gamble.

Ooh, that's a good opening.

Which is why, upon finding
himself low on funds,

he decided to head
off to New Zealand

to mooch off his old friend
and fellow traveler, Stanley.

Excellent.

Now, upon discovering that
Stanley Oakley was dead,

a new plan began to form.

Mr. McCallum chanced his hand by
moving in and refusing to leave.

He has ridden this stalemate
as far as he possibly can.

Well, that stalemate
ends here today.

I'm sure you'll agree that
a last will and testament

is more legally binding than
a beer stained bar menu.

Wow.

The defense rests.
- Oh, very good.

Although, if we were
actually doing this,

then you and I would
be the prosecution.

Um, I have to go.
David needs me, so...

And I couldn't
possibly go like this.

Oh, God forbid. Thanks.

Stacy. Hi.

Can you please let David
know that I'm here?

Do you have an appointment?

No, no, no. He asked
me to come down.

It's wedding stuff.

I'll see if he's available.

Your name?

Uh, Daisy. Uh, you
know me, Stacy.

Daisy. Wait here.

Oh, Nic?

Hey. What are you...
What are you doing here

by yourself?

Oh, um, Vic's been super
busy with... something.

Well, you know, you
could have called me.

I mean, I'm... I'm not Vic,

but I'm... I'm a super
proud heart parent.

Oh, no, no, no. It's
just a routine checkup.

Oh. Well, okay.

I'll send out the heart
parent signal if I need you.

There she is, my
beautiful bride to be.

Aw. So what's the
big emergency?

Ah, well, Kathy Matheson has
discovered that her fiancé,

Craig, has been having an
affair with her sister.

I'm sorry, who discovered what?

All you need to know
is their wedding is off

and the venue that I thought
was completely off the cards

is now available.

Check it out.

I mean, this is a
venue with a capital V.

V for "very cool".

I mean, look at it.

Uh, yeah, I'm looking.

Uh...

Oh!

Uh, so don't you think it's a
little bit "Game of Thrones"?

Well, I don't know. I've
never seen that TV series.

I heard it was just
all boobs and dragons.

Uh, yeah. Pretty much.

All right, well,
people loved it,

so we're onto a winner.

Yeah. Well, it's
just, you know,

it doesn't have a
great track record

when it comes to weddings.

- Right.
- A bit of a history of

out and out of slaughter.

Right.

So this place is out,
and we've got six weeks

to find another one.
- Mm-hmm.

You are an events expert

and I have a vast
amount of experience

in a wide range of weddings,

so...
- Oh.

Is there something
I should know?

What? No. No.

No, it's just that someone
was always getting married

or remarried

and I just grew up loving
everything about big weddings.

Oh. Why is this something I'm
only learning about you now?

Well, because we haven't
hung out at many weddings.

My whanau, we do good weddings.

Well, that bodes well
for us then, doesn't it?

Yeah.

- More tea, Vicar?
- Don't mind if I do.

Now, I'm not overstaying
my welcome, am I?

Oh, no, William. You're
very welcome here

anytime.

- Mi casa es su casa.
- Mm.

La vida es una
aventura, atrévete.

Which means "Life
is an adventure.

Be brave."

Picked up a little
bit of Spanish

with an all Spanish crew sailing
around the Mediterranean.

But a man of the
world like you, Don,

I'm not telling you anything
you don't already know.

Hmm?

You two must have
traveled the globe.

Not as much as you'd think.

Why would we need
to go anywhere?

I mean, look at that view.

We would be hard
pressed to beat that.

Mm.

It is a fine vista,
but I have seen better.

Hmm.

The Bay of Kotor. Montenegro.

I was standing on the
bow, watching the sunrise,

seeing the old buildings spring
to life as the sun touched them.

You know, I've played cards
with the king of Egypt,

I've danced in the rain
with a real live princess,

but all that pales
in insignificance

next to that beautiful
morning on the Bay of Kotor.

Sounds perfect.

It was, Don. It was.

Well, I'm guessing won't be long

before you're off
wandering again.

Ah, young man's game.

I'm ready to settle here,

at Oakley.

So you're not worried about
the impending mediation case?

Not at all.

Louis, have you heard
anything from Vic?

Listen.

What? I can't hear anything.

Exactly. No clattering
of pots and pans.

Oh.

No endless stories about
world travel, and best of all,

no shanties about
whalers tonguing.

What is tonguing anyway,
in terms of whales?

Oh, you don't want to know.

It's very unpleasant.
Don't Google it.

So, Tippy...
- Please, Daisy.

Just give me a moment to
enjoy my Earl Gray in peace.

Oh, come on, Louis.

You just have to talk to her
and get it out in the open.

Oh, so I'm head of HR now, am I?

Well, you're the one
reading the book.

You do realize that the
traditional English response

to human resources has
been to imprison everyone

and plunder their riches.

I'm asking you to talk to
her, not invade the Falklands.

Uh, strictly speaking,
we didn't invade.

We were there first.
- Come on, Louis.

You've got a
relationship with her.

You've got a relationship
with her too.

You're afraid to talk
to her, aren't you?

You're the people person.
Honestly, of the two of us,

Which is better
suited to this task?

- Knock, knock. Hi.
- What's this?

Oh, it's a... it's a
Daisy charcuterie board.

Got some lovely runny
cheese and eggs and sushi

and pate and sprouts, mussels.

Strange mix of stuff.

Yeah, it's a treat for us girls.

I thought we could have a chat.

Hmm.

So would you like some cheese?

It's nice and ripe and runny.

No thanks.

Any particular reason why not?

Cheese ruins the
palate for wine.

That's why wine and cheese
evenings are so stupid.

- What about some mussels?
- Are they raw?

- Smoked.
- I only eat raw.

- Pate?
- Never liked brown food.

- Sushi?
- Or cold rice.

Unless it's hot outside.

Mm-hmm.

Tippy, is there anything
you'd like to discuss?

Just us girls.
Anything at all.

- Actually, there is.
- Yes?

You're not gonna
like it, though.

Well, you don't
know that. It's me.

You can tell me anything.

It's about my bridesmaid dress.

I wanted to make a change.
- Oh.

Oh. You think you
might need it altered

and maybe let out at
the waist a little bit?

I want to wear flowing pants
and like a loose shirt instead.

Pants?

Oh. Uh... Um...

Well, it's just that
my bridesmaids' dresses

was the one thing that I'd
lock down for the wedding.

Oh, if there's too
much trouble...

- No, no, no, no, it's fine.
- Thanks.

- Nice chat.
- Yep.

Daisy. Here.

I have a surprise for you.

Hmm?

It's called Daisy's Delight.

It's a wedding gift.

- Sorry?
- For your wedding.

A signature cocktail.

Oh, uh, yes, William.

I appreciate the thought,
but it's not really me.

I've bought all the rum in bulk,

wholesale prices
through the business.

So Oakley's paying for this?

- Mm...
- Oh, William, I'm sorry,

but rum cocktails don't
fit the theme, so...

Theme? So what's the big
picture for the special event?

You know, what's
the overall mood?

Well, right now,
it's dark and stormy.

Oh, great cocktail.
Look, Daisy,

I've organized quite a
few parties in my time.

Yes, William, I'm a bit of
an event planner myself.

Oh. You two are
gonna love this.

Louis, Daisy,

may I present Roger, or Jolly
Roger as I like to call him,

on account of his
sunny disposition.

He's here to build
a cellar door.

But we already
have a cellar door.

You'll enjoy working with him.

I only work alone.

Oh, well, he only works alone,

but you'll be more than
happy with the end result.

Hmm. We can't afford it.

Well, you see, that's
the best thing, Louis.

Roger works for free.

What? Why?

Well, let's just
say he does it out

of the kindness of his heart.

William, we have only a few
days to go before the mediation.

Yes,

and to make big changes
without consulting us

when you probably
won't be here...

Oh, come on, partners.

Let's not look at gift horse
in the mouth, shall we?

I'm going to say no to
this generous offer.

Me too.

You're saying no? Well,
let me tell you something.

I own half of this vineyard.

And I say he stays.
End of discussion.

The long arm of the law.

Yvonne, how can we help you?

You can tell me who owns
this backfiring rust bucket

of rolling violations.

I've heard reports of gunshots
from Cooper's Gap to Peak View.

Well, I think maybe

a little roadworthy
inspection is an order.

Yes?

Tell you what, while she's busy,

I'll show you where
you're gonna stay.

There's an unused
caravan up the back.

It's not unused, actually.

Hey. Don't leave the premises.

Yeah, I'll bring him
right back, Officer.

Fear not.
- So will I.

There she is.

Your home away from home
for the next few weeks.

Weeks? William, this
is unacceptable.

This is Gus's home.

Oh.

Nope.

Oh, come on, love.

Gus is off living his
best life in Hollywood

with his significant other.

He's not coming back.

Come on. Don't
worry about her.

You can camp down
at the cellar door.

That way it'll cut down
on your commute to work.

It's getting a bit busy
round here, isn't it?

It is. The more the
merrier, they say.

They say. What does
Louis Oakley say?

Um, well, I say,

give me four walls
and the certainty

that the phone will not ring.

That's better than any spar.

Solitude is not all
it's cracked up to be.

I don't mind a crowd. I
just prefer a smaller one.

Oh.

- How small is small?
- Mm, capacity of two.

No que for the bath.

Oh, well, that sounds
perfect, -Doesn't it?

Far from the madding crowd.

"Whenever you look
up, there shall I be,

and whenever I
look up, there..."

"there will be you."

We did Thomas
Hardy at book club.

Oh.

So much better than "Cat's Eye".

Oh, God.

Anyway, no rest for the wicked.

Yeah.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Just thought I'd pop
by, see how you are.

- Oh, fine.
- Good.

Got time for a cuppa?

Uh, sorry.

No, it's just our
birthing guru is here.

Oh, uh, sorry.

Louis and I had that in
our diaries for next week,

but I'm here now,
so I could be...

Oh, hi, Daisy.

Actually, it's just me and Nic
today because of the energies.

Yeah, that's right,
Yeah, the energies.

- Yeah.
- Vic,

have you done something
with your, um...

Nope.

Better get back to it, eh?

- Yeah.
- See you.

Okay.

Sorry.

It's just we want to do
everything by the book.

No, I totally understand.

Yeah. It's just, I'm
just... I'm just checking.

Um, I-I haven't done anything
to upset you, have I?

No.

We just have a lot on our minds.

I better get back to it.
- Yeah, of course.

Um, just, you know, I'm
here if you need me.

Okay.

I'm exploring the energies
and vibrations around you,

the babies, and Vic.

Am I vibrating?

Oh, I'm sorry, -What
do the vibrations say?

Love. A lot of
love and strengths.

Everyone says I look different.

You have put on a bit of
sympathy weight, babe.

Is there any way that could
be affecting my energies?

Yes.

Yes, your energies are
a little different.

No. No, you look
exactly the same to me.

And is there anything else?

Well, let me consult my
divination cup. Now...

Yeah, it's just, um...

Yes, I know exactly where it is.

It's that we really want
to do everything right.

There is no right or wrong,

No, one new life, it's
the beginning of...

it's the beginning
of all things.

Wonder, hope, dream,
of possibilities.

You are creating two lives.

- It's pretty scary.
- Yeah.

I know. You're strong, and so
is the bond between you all.

And when you're ready
for others to join you

on this path, you'll know.

Hmm.

Wanda.

I feel my mind drifting
at the moment, Wanda.

Yes, I know. Let
your mind drift.

Just make sure it
remembers to come back.

I'd hate to lose my
mind, eh, old girl?

Yes, yes. The irony
is not lost on me.

I'm the one conversing
with the pig

and you're the one
doing all the talking.

Louis. Wanda, it's Louis.

What brings you to our
little corner of the world?

Oh, well, I'm searching
for a bit of sanity, Don.

What?

Oh, Wanda says you've
come to the right place.

Oh, well, thank you, Wanda.

You know, you're much better
company than some humans.

I know.

- William?
- The very man.

You know, he's not a bad chap,

given half a chance.

Don, I have given that
man so many chances.

Sometimes it feels like
I've invited a vampire

across our threshold.

Well, you know the best way

to deal with
vampires, don't you?

Holy water.

I knew I can rely on you, Don.

Now, this is only
a temporary fix.

You realize he'll still
be there in the morning?

Oh, yes. I know,
but don't worry.

I think our case is
wrapped up tighter

than an extremely tight thing.

What? Do you know
something I don't?

We had dinner with
William last night

and he seemed very confident.

- Daisy.
- Hmm?

Has William said anything
to you about the mediation?

No. Why?

Don says he's confident...
overly confident about winning.

I mean, he could be
bluffing I suppose,

or maybe he's just...

Do you think he's trying
to get inside our heads?

Well, I think he's
already in there.

So, what are we going to do?

Well, I'll just go
over the case again

with a fine-toothed comb.

Actually, I've been
meaning to ask you,

has... has Vic been
acting a bit weird lately?

Weirder than usual, you
mean? No, I don't think so.

Oh, while you were there,

did you manage to get any intel
from Nic about Tippy's, uh...

What, you think
because Nic's pregnant,

she's got some biological
alarm clock going off,

alerting her to other pregnant
women in the vicinity?

No, of course not.

No, that'd be ridiculous.

Oh, look. You know what?
This has gone far enough.

We're going to see Tippy.
- What?

- Come on.
- Oh, Louis.

No.

Louis.

Tippy.

Hello.

Um, there's an
unspoken situation here

that really needs
to be, um, spoken,

about the apparent change

in your...

Which could be, as I think,

a localized expansion of... fat,

or it could be the result
of a dalliance of a, uh...

of a sexual nature.

Okay.

Tippy, what Louis is trying to
say is that we were wondering

if... if we're about to hear
the patter of tiny feet.

A patter that we would welcome.

- Yes.
- I mean, celebrate, in fact.

I mean, we are a business here,

but we are first and
foremost a family.

Yes, exactly.

And if that family
were about to expand...

Yes.

Not in an extra dress
size up kind of way.

More... More, well, biological.

Yes.

A beautiful biological
way, then it would be good

for us to know how to expand.

- Yes. As you expand.
- Yes.

In conclusion...

I just hope that
we've made it, um...

- Well, the position.
- The position. Yeah.

Let's hope we made it clear.

Tippy.

You're pregnant?

- Yeah.
- Gus.

- Hello.
- Hey.

So, Gus, you must have all
kinds of questions for Tippy

about her condition.

No. No, it seems
pretty straightforward.

Well, I'm so glad
you're back, Gus.

Wasn't expecting you quite
so early for the wedding.

Griff and I broke up.

What? Oh, Gus, I'm sorry.

Why didn't you or
Griff say anything?

I'm kind of saying it now.

Are you all right?

Do you want to talk about it?

Ah, the prodigal son returns.

- And you're still here.
- Yes.

I've become something of a
permanent, much loved fixture.

Neither of those things is true.

I don't think anyone
wants you here.

Fair enough.

A new shoe always hurts
a little at first.

Tippy told me about the case.
You're gonna win, right?

Yeah.

Yeah, probably.

- Probably?
- Probably. Yeah.

11:45 A.M.

14.8 degrees Celsius.
- It's ridiculous.

Oh, well, if you don't
want it, I'll take it back.

Oh, no, no, no.

You've plugged it in now,
so it might as well stay.

- Mm.
- Uh-uh, what are you doing?

Don't move anything.

I have everything just
the way I like it.

What?

So these moldy old
coffee cups on the table

are just the way you
like it? Is that it?

Okay. Okay. You can
probably move those.

Mm.

Oh, Hils, you're blind as a bat.

I am not. I can see.

I just... I just
have to be close.

Really close and out the
side of my eye like that.

I don't have to see to know
how you're looking at me,

Rissy.

Face facts.

Your sight is
leaving the building,

and there is no problem
with accepting help.

Now, I've already
sent Roy and Pete

over to help you
in the vineyard.

So you didn't say
no to that, did you?

I'd be a fool to turn down

free laborers.

On that subject,
I've been thinking.

Uh-oh.

Now that you've got
them here helping you,

why don't you let me take
over your production as well?

Oh, oh, I see what
you're trying to do.

Yeah, a little bit of help here,

a little bit of
bookkeeping there,

and before I know it,

you'd have stolen the vineyard
out from under my nose.

Okay. Okay.

Well, I'm desperate
to steal this place.

A run-down old eyesore. God.

I know no one else dares
say no to Marissa, but I do.

Read my lips. No.

- So it's over?
- Yep.

You know, everything you
warned me about happened.

Griff had his work
and his friends

and I just had Griff,

and I didn't want him
to give up his life,

so I set him free.

So why didn't you tell
me you were pregnant?

'Cause I know you'd
come straight back.

Yeah, I would have. Do
you want to talk about it?

How did it actually happen?

The usual way.

You want me to
draw you a picture?

Do I know the father?

No. But he's a good
guy. You'd like him.

So how are, uh, Daisy
and Louis holding up?

You know, all good.

They're really
pulling their weight.

Do they still, you know,

like, need me or...

We all need you,
Gus. You're the glue.

The only thing you
need to worry about

is what we all need
to worry about...

William.

Voila. Do you remember that?

Oh, for heaven's sake.

That's from our
honeymoon in Paris.

Where did you find
it? Where's it been?

In the box room.

Best holiday we ever had.

Not only the best holiday,

but the only holiday
we've ever had.

Oh, rubbish. No.

We were at the wine
conference in London

and we had a growers
conference in Napa,

and last year, we were
at Martha's Vineyard

with the sustainability tour.

They weren't holidays,
they were all work.

Oh, semantics. Work and play.

We've visited places, but
we've never experienced them.

What's going on here?

- I talked to Ben.
- Mm-hmm?

He's happy to take
over the vineyards.

- What?
- It's time for us to retire

and... and fill our shelves
with silly souvenirs,

and a heart's worth 1,000
memories. We've earned it.

You have no right to talk
to Ben behind my back.

No right to make a decision
like this without me.

Don.

Now, when I look around this
room, I know we're gonna win,

not just 'cause our opponent
has a terrible case,

which he most certainly does,
but well, because of all of you.

- Oh. Here, here.
- Destroy him.

You sure you don't want
us to come with you?

Oh, no. Thanks Gus.

You stay here and wait to
enjoy the fruits of victory.

Wait, victory fruits?

Are they like strawberries?

Because I'm allergic
to strawberries.

No, it's metaphorical.

No, it's not. It's
a medical condition.

- Right. Right.
- Mm.

- Good luck.
- Thanks.

Okay.

I made this for
when they get back.

Oh, I'd take it
easy today, Roger.

And when we get back, you
can pack up and head home.

Wouldn't be so sure about that.

Oh, I'm pretty sure.

I'm pretty sure I had
him in our last game too,

but here I am.

The devil has many tricks,

but the best one is making
you think you're winning

when you've already lost.

Oh.

Hmm.

All the best.

Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick.

How do you do this all the time?

Well, I don't anymore, do I?

We both just need to keep calm.
- Right.

I mean, he's got nothing, right?

- Right.
- Yeah.

Just ridiculous.

I feel like I'm back
at the Old Bailey.

Look, it's just...
it's a mediation

and we hold all the cards.
- Yes.

Except he is a
professional player.

Daisy. Daisy.

William, could I
have a word, please?

You have my undivided attention.

Um, when I first came to Oakley,

I just wanted a quick sale and
then back to my life in Sydney.

But I found something here...
a connection, to Stanley,

to my past, to the people.

I found a purpose.
Oakley is my purpose.

It's... It's Louis's purpose.
It's Gus and Tippy's.

Can you honestly
say that it's yours?

Daisy,

no matter what happens,

there will always be a
place for you at Oakley.

He's definitely up to something.

- Why? What did he say?
- Oh, it's not what he said.

It's the way that he said it.

He's convinced
he's going to win.

I'm convinced he's bluffing.

M'lord...

Oh, not the last time
I looked, Mr. Oakley,

but you may call me Gail.

- Shall I sit down?
- You may.

Six months ago,

Mr. William McCallum arrived
on our doorstep claiming

to own 50% of our business and
our property, Oakley Wines.

Now, we are good, kind people,

so we said that he could
stay with us for a few days,

but he refused to leave, and
he has been there ever since.

What Mr. McCallum has as
evidence for his claim

is little more than a
drunken promise scrawled

on the back of a beer
stained bar menu.

Furthermore, we've no way
of knowing who witnessed

this so called deed.

It is simply a scrawled
illegible signature,

and we only have Mr. McCallum's
word that Stanley even wrote it.

But what we do
have is a written,

witnessed and notarized will,

a legal document which
leaves Oakley Wines to myself

and to Miss Monroe
as the sole heirs.

Well, Mr. Oakley makes
some very salient points,

and I must warn
you, Miss McCallum,

if the menu is the
only thing you have,

it will not stand up
in a court of law.

Now, may I suggest we take
a short bathroom break?

Apologies. UTI. Ghastly.

Ooh! It was amazing.

Well, that felt pretty amazing.

Well, you heard Gail.

That bar menu is not
gonna get the job done.

Yeah.

Finally, we're going to have
our home to ourselves again.

I should get some water. I
have a dry throat after that.

- Ah.
- Oh.

Fancy seeing you here.

Well, you know, there was a time

when the place to find
me was in a courthouse.

'Cause I was being a lawyer,

not 'cause I was
always being arrested.

Right.

So just the once,
then? Public indecency.

Oh, yeah.

I was kind of hoping
you hadn't seen that.

Well, it seems to
me everyone saw that

piccadilly willy.
- Yeah, well,

social media's got
a lot to answer for.

So what brings you here?

- Him.
- Hello.

But actually, I was wanting
to talk to you about a case,

not this one.

A young lad from Peak View.

Been up to no good.
- Oh, yeah.

What a little lout. Hope
they threw the book at him.

No, he's a good kid. I'd
like to help him out.

Yeah, I mean, when
I say "louts",

that's probably what
other people are saying

about him,

less empathetic types.

Well, I could use some
legal advice about it,

so could you...
- Of course.

No, I am your humple servant.

Humble... Humble
servant. Humple.

Don't even know
where that came from.

I-I-I'd best be getting along.

Okay.

Well, come on, then.

Mr. McCallum.

Gail, they say a man
who represents himself

has a fool for a client.

While I'm no lawyer,

albeit a disbarred,
disgraced lawyer,

like my fellow colleague,
I'm certainly no fool.

I know that this bar menu
isn't worth the paper

it's written on.

But this deed is.

When Stanley sobered up,

he agreed to supply me with
a properly executed deed.

You'll note there

that it was witnessed by
Stanley Oakley's lawyer,

a Mr. Victor Grimes.

Oh. Vic.

Oh.

Oh, babe, Louis is a friend.

I'm sure he I didn't
mean it at all.

He's just really upset.

Oh, it's all my fault.

Stanley was always
giving me things to sign.

I didn't even know
what I was signing.

I'm such an idiot.

I can never face them again.

It's been a really
shit month, hasn't it?

♪ ...may the Wellerman come ♪

♪ To bring us sugar
and tea and rum ♪

♪ One day, when the
tonguing is done ♪

You guys can hang out
in my room if you like.

♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪

♪ Da-da-da-da-da ♪

Hey!

I feel like I should
say something right no,

but I just don't know
what to say, you know?

Mm.

There's nothing to say, Gus.

We're stuck with
bloody William and his

whale tonguing shitty shanties.

Oh, no thanks, Tippy.

I think I'm just
gonna get some air.

- You okay?
- Yeah.

I mean, I have had my fair
share of bad days in court,

but today pretty much
left them all for dead.

Is there anything we can do?

Well, we could try
for the High Court,

but even if we could afford
a KC, with the evidence

that William gave today,
it'd be a waste of time.

No, I think William has us,
ironically, over a barrel.

I'm just so sorry,
Daisy. I let you down.

No, no, you haven't. You
haven't let anyone down.

Oh.

I better get going.

- Going where?
- Well, it's a legal thing.

I said I'd help a friend
out, and I figured a couple

of bottles of liquid
lubrication couldn't hurt.

Surely, you can postpone,
given the circumstances.

No, I think the distraction
would be good for me.

So...

No, I think you're gonna
be absolutely fine.

Well, you can
color me impressed.

You must have been a hell
of a lawyer back in the day.

What?

Well, yes, the case
is quite complicated,

but for me, it's a doddle.

On the flip side,

I can't seem to solve my
own legal problems at all.

How could you possibly
have known he was sitting

on a signed deed?

I know. I couldn't.

But the fault ultimately
lies with Muggins here.

Losing isn't the
end of everything.

Do you want to know the secret
to getting back up again?

Mm. I do.

One simple truth.

Life goes on, and
fortune favors the brave.

You're a very wise woman.

Well, flattery will get
you everywhere, Mr. Oakley.

Right. Well, I-I suppose I'm
gonna be toddling back home,

back to the land of the loss

and the harbor of endless
damn sea shanties.

I'm afraid I can't allow that.

- Sorry?
- You're over the limit.

Legally, I can't let you drive.

But you kept topping
up... my glass.

Did I?

Fortune favors the brave.

Indeed, it does.