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1
00:00:04,964 --> 00:00:06,173
[♪ Tierra Whack: "Only Child"]
2
00:00:06,257 --> 00:00:07,800
♪ Yeah ♪
3
00:00:08,801 --> 00:00:10,428
♪ Yeah ♪
4
00:00:11,345 --> 00:00:12,722
♪ Yeah ♪
5
00:00:12,805 --> 00:00:14,056
[Oliver] Oh,
that looks good.
6
00:00:14,140 --> 00:00:15,641
- Beychella?
- Quadchella.
7
00:00:15,725 --> 00:00:17,768
The triplets'
17th birthday version.
8
00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:19,812
Triplets?
Aren't there four?
9
00:00:19,895 --> 00:00:21,206
Well, Olive's
birthday is tomorrow.
10
00:00:21,230 --> 00:00:22,565
She was born
after midnight.
11
00:00:22,648 --> 00:00:24,817
Anyway... I'm...
12
00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,362
I'm going
with Killian,
13
00:00:28,446 --> 00:00:29,739
as in,
like, on a date.
14
00:00:29,822 --> 00:00:31,240
We're dating.
Sort of.
15
00:00:31,323 --> 00:00:32,992
We're
not surprised.
16
00:00:33,075 --> 00:00:35,161
The video he posted
of you was so adorable.
17
00:00:35,244 --> 00:00:37,204
You creeped his profile?
18
00:00:37,288 --> 00:00:39,099
[Oliver] What kind of parents
would we be if we didn't?
19
00:00:39,123 --> 00:00:40,708
We'll unpack
how you're drawn
20
00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:42,151
to family figures
when we get home.
21
00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,919
Oh, so we're fine
with me dating now
22
00:00:44,003 --> 00:00:45,838
after wanting
to send me to Bible camp?
23
00:00:45,921 --> 00:00:47,721
It was the only one
we could book last minute.
24
00:00:47,757 --> 00:00:49,234
Now, if you'd have
sexted a Junior Prof
25
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:51,051
earlier in the year,
26
00:00:51,135 --> 00:00:53,220
we could've packed you
off to swim camp.
27
00:00:53,304 --> 00:00:55,115
Never wanted you not to date,
just wanted better judgement.
28
00:00:55,139 --> 00:00:57,224
[Naomi] Now dating boys
your age
29
00:00:57,308 --> 00:00:59,202
can still have its challenges.
They're all prefrontal cortex
30
00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,270
with poor impulse control
and poor hygiene...
31
00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:03,606
Hey, what's more
psychologically disturbing?
32
00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:05,775
Baby head in the toilet
or random limbs?
33
00:01:05,858 --> 00:01:08,152
It's the head, right?
It's gotta be the head.
34
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:10,279
I thought we were done
with horror pranks.
35
00:01:10,362 --> 00:01:12,299
Yeah, Whoreen said that
someone from “Payne Realty”
36
00:01:12,323 --> 00:01:14,116
is coming by
to look at the cabin,
37
00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:16,035
so I figure
if we let Murder Manor's
38
00:01:16,118 --> 00:01:17,745
natural gore core
shine through
39
00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,828
then maybe we got a shot
at renting it next summer.
40
00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:21,457
Why don't you
put an offer in?
41
00:01:21,540 --> 00:01:23,083
Girl, if I had
that kind of cash...
42
00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:24,376
Yeah,
but Maisy does, right?
43
00:01:24,460 --> 00:01:26,170
Show Maisy the trust.
44
00:01:26,253 --> 00:01:28,005
I know you were saving
it for a big play
45
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:30,066
but she might help if she
thinks that her dream reno
46
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,802
- all comes to us one day.
- It might persuade her
47
00:01:32,885 --> 00:01:34,595
to buy us out.
48
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:37,932
Ah man... that would be
enough for a down payment.
49
00:01:38,015 --> 00:01:39,183
[knocking]
50
00:01:43,395 --> 00:01:44,647
[giggling]
51
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:46,023
Lock up your spouse.
52
00:01:46,148 --> 00:01:48,275
Jayne Payne
will sell da house!
53
00:01:49,235 --> 00:01:50,861
Still workshopping
my tagline.
54
00:01:50,945 --> 00:01:53,781
Jayne,
you're Payne Realty?
55
00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:56,408
Yeah,
Payne is my maiden name.
56
00:01:56,492 --> 00:02:00,371
No pain, all gain.
With Jayne... not bad.
57
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,997
Well, since when
did real estate
58
00:02:02,081 --> 00:02:03,332
become your
side hustle?
59
00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:05,292
It used to be
my main hustle
60
00:02:05,376 --> 00:02:07,837
but then the girls came and
I had to get out of the life.
61
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,588
It just... it took too much.
62
00:02:09,672 --> 00:02:11,465
But there's been
some local interest
63
00:02:11,549 --> 00:02:13,759
and Whoreen asked if I
could help and so I thought...
64
00:02:13,843 --> 00:02:15,845
“Let's see
if she can still dance.”
65
00:02:16,846 --> 00:02:18,931
[sigh] Teesa's posts
66
00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:21,934
made this space look
like a lot cuter.
67
00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:24,436
Yeah, we just took
all of our stuff down
68
00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:26,939
so this is
the cabin's original charm.
69
00:02:27,022 --> 00:02:29,692
- Is that blood splatter?
- It's not fresh.
70
00:02:29,775 --> 00:02:31,193
Oh. Okay...
71
00:02:34,697 --> 00:02:36,448
Show Maisy the trust.
72
00:02:36,532 --> 00:02:38,409
Honesty
is the way to go.
73
00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:40,035
Yeah,
it's also a long shot.
74
00:02:41,120 --> 00:02:42,538
[Jayne screams]
75
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:45,040
Oh, you found
Rosemary's baby head!
76
00:02:45,124 --> 00:02:49,169
[♪ Lois Ann Struck:
"You'd Sing Love"]
77
00:02:50,421 --> 00:02:51,839
- Maiser!
- [quietly] Ow.
78
00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:56,010
What are you doing
to my favourite shorts?
79
00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:57,469
I'm fixing a button.
80
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:01,056
You're letting them out?
81
00:03:01,140 --> 00:03:03,809
I... I told you
that following Opal
82
00:03:03,893 --> 00:03:06,645
on his patisserie journey
would have consequences.
83
00:03:06,729 --> 00:03:09,523
I was supposed to roll
the dough, not become it.
84
00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:12,484
No, no, no, no.
No fatphobic talk, okay?
85
00:03:13,319 --> 00:03:16,030
Pro athletes have such
unrealistic beauty standards.
86
00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:20,034
Long flow, washboard abs,
dumptruck ass...
87
00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:23,329
No man
has all three.
88
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:27,333
I just... pulled my back
doing a baby gym session.
89
00:03:27,416 --> 00:03:30,377
Tiltapalooza's next week
and how can I defend my title?
90
00:03:30,461 --> 00:03:32,588
You suck it up
and suck it in.
91
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:34,548
Go have a shvitz
at Ulrika's
92
00:03:34,632 --> 00:03:36,050
and loosen
that back up.
93
00:03:36,133 --> 00:03:39,261
Because I married
a ten time champion.
94
00:03:40,179 --> 00:03:41,263
Thanks, babe.
95
00:03:43,432 --> 00:03:44,725
[knocking]
96
00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:45,851
[sing-songy] Hello.
97
00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:47,144
Oh.
98
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:49,563
What do you want?
99
00:03:50,147 --> 00:03:53,359
Um... So... Um...
100
00:03:59,782 --> 00:04:00,866
[clears throat]
101
00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:09,416
Dad never told me
about a trust.
102
00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:10,918
Probably 'cause
he's not your dad
103
00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:13,128
but the long
and the short of it is...
104
00:04:13,963 --> 00:04:15,506
the cottage is mine.
105
00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:19,593
[heavy classic rock plays]
106
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:27,726
But... Derrick
left the cottage to me.
107
00:04:27,810 --> 00:04:28,978
Yes, correct.
108
00:04:29,061 --> 00:04:31,188
But once
you leave it or kick it,
109
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:32,648
the cottage
comes to me.
110
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:34,108
Oh, well,
I don't plan
111
00:04:34,191 --> 00:04:35,901
on kicking it
any time soon, so...
112
00:04:35,985 --> 00:04:37,152
Maisy, this is not about us.
113
00:04:37,236 --> 00:04:38,904
This is
about the kids.
114
00:04:38,988 --> 00:04:41,657
And this document says that
any money that you spend
115
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:44,368
on the cottage goes to Billie,
not Killian and Opal.
116
00:04:45,202 --> 00:04:47,955
Which is why I'm proposing
117
00:04:48,038 --> 00:04:49,915
that you buy me out
118
00:04:49,999 --> 00:04:52,001
for half
the cottage's current value.
119
00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:54,253
Which would be
cheaper than post-reno
120
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:56,630
and it'll let me put
an offer on the murder cabin.
121
00:04:57,840 --> 00:04:59,425
And then, maybe,
Maisy, we can just put
122
00:04:59,508 --> 00:05:01,969
all this
family drama shit behind us.
123
00:05:02,052 --> 00:05:04,471
I appreciate
you telling me.
124
00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,682
Why don't we just go down
to the dock and discuss it?
125
00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:07,975
So you
can drown me?
126
00:05:08,058 --> 00:05:09,351
Not if you push me first.
127
00:05:09,435 --> 00:05:10,728
I'll just grab us
some coffee.
128
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:12,896
Okay.
All right.
129
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:14,732
But Billie
knows where I am
130
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:15,917
just in case
anything happens.
131
00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:16,984
Duly noted.
132
00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:18,277
Are you still four creams?
133
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:19,945
Black.
134
00:05:20,029 --> 00:05:22,281
Actually, two,
lactose free if you've got it
135
00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:24,408
or oat, almond
in a pinch is fine.
136
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:26,702
- Thank you.
- Mm-hm.
137
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:29,997
Honesty
is the way to go.
138
00:05:31,874 --> 00:05:35,878
[muzak instrumental]
139
00:05:35,961 --> 00:05:42,961
♪
140
00:05:43,052 --> 00:05:48,223
♪
141
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:52,603
[quietly] Dammit.
142
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:56,106
[♪ Haiku Hands: "Jupiter"]
143
00:05:56,190 --> 00:05:58,108
♪ Oh, oh, oh, Jupiter ♪
144
00:05:59,443 --> 00:06:02,237
♪ Oh, oh, oh, Jupiter... ♪
145
00:06:02,321 --> 00:06:05,240
[talking over each other]
146
00:06:08,327 --> 00:06:10,454
[Wayne] Smile!
Just... yeah...
147
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,914
[Olive] Hey!
148
00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:13,373
[Wayne] Wai... wait.
Just one sec.
149
00:06:13,457 --> 00:06:15,125
- We'll do you in a second.
- 17!
150
00:06:15,209 --> 00:06:16,919
Can Olive not be
in this picture, please?
151
00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:18,682
There we go, Olive,
go ahead, get in there.
152
00:06:18,754 --> 00:06:19,963
[Olive] Okay.
153
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,965
All right.
Looks good.
154
00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:23,759
I feel
a little bit underdressed
155
00:06:23,842 --> 00:06:25,010
next to the Queen B.
156
00:06:25,094 --> 00:06:26,720
Oh, shut it.
157
00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:28,573
Your Jared Leto
is full fashion meth realness.
158
00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:30,641
[whispers] They wish
they looked so hot.
159
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:31,809
Hello.
160
00:06:32,643 --> 00:06:33,894
Early birthday gift.
161
00:06:35,020 --> 00:06:36,563
Can-do-nabis.
162
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,274
That is so sweet,
I hate it.
163
00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:40,609
[whistle blows]
164
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:43,612
Hey!
165
00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:45,656
Well. [sighs]
166
00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:47,533
I would like
to say a few words.
167
00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:52,287
My baby girls
are 17, now.
168
00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:54,915
Almost womans...
169
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,417
practically DJs.
170
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:04,383
Do not take this time
in your life for granted.
171
00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:07,970
You have got to cherish
these ragers without hangovers.
172
00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:11,723
Okay.
173
00:07:13,392 --> 00:07:14,768
[metallic scrunch]
174
00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:16,979
And don't forget
to party the fuck on!
175
00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:18,772
- Woo!
- [scattered applause]
176
00:07:18,856 --> 00:07:20,858
- But party safe. Obviously.
- Okay, thanks, Daddy.
177
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:22,252
Let's wrap it up.
- Hey, hey, hey,
178
00:07:22,276 --> 00:07:23,527
have you seen your mom?
179
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:24,820
She left early
this morning.
180
00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,238
Okay, no boomers
at Quadchella.
181
00:07:26,321 --> 00:07:28,157
[Wayne] She won't
take my calls.
182
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,909
Don't forget water.
Drink lots of water, okay?
183
00:07:30,993 --> 00:07:32,846
- [Keri] You got it.
- The answer is always water!
184
00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:34,663
- [Jeri] Love you, Daddy!
- [Keri] Bye-yee!
185
00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:36,266
[Wayne] I'm not
cleaning up anyone's puke!
186
00:07:36,290 --> 00:07:37,416
Except my own.
187
00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:38,959
All right, people.
188
00:07:40,127 --> 00:07:41,378
[magical ding]
189
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,713
Let the magic begin.
190
00:07:44,381 --> 00:07:46,133
You know,
when I dropped that trust bomb,
191
00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:48,056
I half-expected you
to come at me with a knife.
192
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:49,678
It's too messy.
193
00:07:49,761 --> 00:07:51,847
They say that
poison is a woman's weapon.
194
00:07:53,348 --> 00:07:56,101
All right, little bro.
Dad wouldn't want us fighting.
195
00:07:56,185 --> 00:07:57,269
Still, not your dad.
196
00:07:57,352 --> 00:07:59,313
But it is my cottage.
197
00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:01,315
So respectfully,
I have to decline your offer.
198
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,150
It's not an offer.
199
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,277
I'm allowing you,
graciously,
200
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:08,280
to buy me out so you can
tear down my family cottage
201
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:10,824
and build some Muskoka
afterbirth with a fugly turret.
202
00:08:10,908 --> 00:08:13,160
It's a Lighthouse gable
and it's not cheap.
203
00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:15,579
Neither is reclaimed wood,
marble countertops
204
00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,039
and Opal's trips to Milan.
205
00:08:17,873 --> 00:08:19,625
We are not in a position
to buy you out.
206
00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:21,418
But...
207
00:08:22,586 --> 00:08:25,464
maybe, we could
redo the bunkie.
208
00:08:25,547 --> 00:08:26,590
Yeah?
209
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,444
Because... I mean, I'd have to
approve the floor plan.
210
00:08:29,468 --> 00:08:31,803
And I've always really wanted
a fire pole, and like, maybe
211
00:08:31,887 --> 00:08:33,889
a dumbwaiter or a hot waiter
or... No, Maisy, wait.
212
00:08:33,972 --> 00:08:35,307
This is not
a negotiation.
213
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:36,475
All right?
214
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:37,893
If you
don't buy me out,
215
00:08:37,976 --> 00:08:39,186
then everything
goes to Billie.
216
00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:40,562
You have no idea
217
00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:42,022
what goes
into cottage ownership.
218
00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:43,815
It takes commitment,
it takes work,
219
00:08:43,899 --> 00:08:45,150
concepts
that you struggle with.
220
00:08:45,234 --> 00:08:46,526
You can't poison me
221
00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:48,195
with your words
or your dairy.
222
00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:49,655
I know
this was real cream.
223
00:08:49,738 --> 00:08:51,031
[sighs]
224
00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:55,452
I really wish
you hadn't done that.
225
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,954
What the fuck!
226
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,914
That was part
of a really cute set.
227
00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:00,624
You brought
a bone saw?
228
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:02,876
It's for drywall,
you amateur.
229
00:09:06,797 --> 00:09:08,215
You detached
the dock?
230
00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:09,818
Had to make sure
you wouldn't run away.
231
00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:13,220
Yeah, the grown ups
are at the Boathouse
232
00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:14,596
and the kids
are at Quadchella
233
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,598
so it's just
you and me, baby.
234
00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:19,226
And our
little trust issue.
235
00:09:22,104 --> 00:09:23,188
[Justin] Help.
236
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:26,775
[indistinct pop music]
237
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:29,403
Today, we honour
my sisters' 17th birthday
238
00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:30,862
and the liminal space
239
00:09:30,946 --> 00:09:32,864
between adolescence
and adulthood.
240
00:09:32,948 --> 00:09:34,324
As your Shrooman,
241
00:09:34,408 --> 00:09:35,888
I will guide you
through today's trip.
242
00:09:35,951 --> 00:09:37,411
There are
only three rules.
243
00:09:37,494 --> 00:09:39,246
One,
stay with friends.
244
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,206
Two,
stay in nature.
245
00:09:41,290 --> 00:09:43,625
And three...
stay hydrated.
246
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:46,837
Ew.
This tastes like trash.
247
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:48,964
Yeah, it's poison,
not truffles.
248
00:09:51,550 --> 00:09:53,010
Don't worry.
249
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:54,773
I secretly micro-dose them
every Christmas.
250
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:56,603
And it's the only time
they ever show empathy.
251
00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:03,687
[exhales] Are we
really doing this?
252
00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:07,399
Studies show psilocybin
has therapeutic benefits.
253
00:10:07,482 --> 00:10:09,776
Cures depression, PTSD.
254
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,158
Let's take our medicine.
255
00:10:18,577 --> 00:10:19,619
Cheers.
256
00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:23,707
♪
257
00:10:27,419 --> 00:10:29,546
[both] Mm...
258
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:32,049
[♪ Qemists Scores ft. FLIK:
"H.O.T."]
259
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,134
♪ And feel the heat
(And feel the heat) ♪
260
00:10:34,217 --> 00:10:36,345
♪ Straight on the street
(Straight on the street) ♪
261
00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:39,431
♪ So fresh
So fine, all mine... ♪
262
00:10:41,516 --> 00:10:44,102
So crazy
how we're all, like...
263
00:10:45,228 --> 00:10:46,521
connected.
264
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:47,773
You know
what I mean?
265
00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:49,775
See?
266
00:10:49,858 --> 00:10:50,942
Empathy.
267
00:10:52,027 --> 00:10:53,862
Why has everyone
gone full Midsommar
268
00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:56,031
and I feel... nothing?
269
00:10:57,282 --> 00:10:58,325
Same.
270
00:10:59,451 --> 00:11:01,411
- And we ate a ton of pizza.
- Yeah.
271
00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:03,705
Food slows
absorption rate,
272
00:11:03,789 --> 00:11:05,123
anticipation, too.
273
00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:07,959
Relax.
It'll happen.
274
00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:09,544
[Teri blows air]
275
00:11:09,628 --> 00:11:11,421
You're, like, low key
276
00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:14,633
my favourite,
favourite sister!
277
00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,344
- Whoa!
- Hi.
278
00:11:17,427 --> 00:11:18,804
- [Teri] Everything...
- Hi.
279
00:11:18,887 --> 00:11:20,555
[Teri] Everything
has a heartbeat.
280
00:11:20,639 --> 00:11:25,310
♪
281
00:11:25,394 --> 00:11:29,523
[giggles] The step-crushins
are totally gonna bone.
282
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:31,024
[Olive] Stop that.
283
00:11:31,108 --> 00:11:32,609
[sighs] Okay, let's go.
284
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,945
- Where?
- To get some privacy.
285
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:36,363
Really?
What?
286
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,490
Don't over think it.
287
00:11:38,573 --> 00:11:40,033
What...
Well, I mean...
288
00:11:41,535 --> 00:11:44,162
I mean we should maybe
overthink it a little bit.
289
00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:45,497
I don't want
to pull a Justin.
290
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:48,708
I mean...
291
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:52,671
you can pull out
but things do happen fast,
292
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:54,256
faster than maybe
you want...
293
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:56,216
Okay, stop
before I pull out, right now.
294
00:11:57,092 --> 00:11:59,761
We'll get some condoms,
then some privacy.
295
00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:03,473
♪ If you wanna take it ♪
296
00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:11,648
Hey, Riley!
297
00:12:12,482 --> 00:12:13,942
I am honoured.
298
00:12:14,025 --> 00:12:15,777
What brings
Queen Bey to the woods?
299
00:12:15,861 --> 00:12:18,280
Your note at the Gas & Go said
you'd be back in five?
300
00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:20,365
I got a hot tip
from a buddy of Highway Patrol
301
00:12:20,449 --> 00:12:22,284
that a swan
got clipped around here.
302
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:26,079
So if I find it, I can finally
finish the season five finale.
303
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,923
Any chance you could
open up the shop for us?
304
00:12:27,998 --> 00:12:29,666
We were just
getting snacks and...
305
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,293
Condoms.
306
00:12:31,376 --> 00:12:32,586
Whoa.
307
00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:34,880
Big day.
308
00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:37,591
It's too bad,
the Hendersons,
309
00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:39,259
they cleared us out
this morning.
310
00:12:39,342 --> 00:12:41,470
But Saggy B and Whoreen
don't live too far away.
311
00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:42,913
I'm sure
they would help the cause.
312
00:12:43,597 --> 00:12:44,639
Killian
could should you.
313
00:12:46,141 --> 00:12:47,976
You... you want me
to just ask them.
314
00:12:48,059 --> 00:12:50,562
Well... Ulrika's really
been pushing her Womb Wash.
315
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:52,636
Apparently
it works on chickens.
316
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:55,251
We just have to ask to use
the Hendersons' bathroom,
317
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,776
grab a few
and bounce.
318
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:58,445
What? A few?
319
00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:00,363
First times always
require a second act.
320
00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:03,783
But... just leave
a few for Saggy B.
321
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,161
STI's are tearing
through the senior's community.
322
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,664
[laughing]
323
00:13:09,748 --> 00:13:10,957
It's not funny, guys.
324
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,209
It's a serious problem.
325
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:13,543
Sure.
326
00:13:13,627 --> 00:13:17,631
[laughing]
327
00:13:17,714 --> 00:13:19,424
You two
are tripping balls.
328
00:13:19,508 --> 00:13:20,550
Come on.
329
00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:22,886
[wild laughter]
330
00:13:22,969 --> 00:13:25,138
Don't tell Justin, okay?
331
00:13:25,222 --> 00:13:26,848
That's gonna get weird.
332
00:13:26,932 --> 00:13:28,016
Yup.
333
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,687
You can't just
bring someone on a dock, Maisy.
334
00:13:32,771 --> 00:13:34,731
I mean,
this is entrapment!
335
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:36,233
You're free to leave.
336
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:37,817
Well,
yeah but I just...
337
00:13:37,901 --> 00:13:39,277
I've never been
this far out before
338
00:13:39,361 --> 00:13:40,779
without a pool noodle.
339
00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:43,573
You better hurry.
Storm's a-comin'.
340
00:13:43,657 --> 00:13:46,117
Yes, because
you poisoned me with dairy.
341
00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:48,662
Not just dairy.
342
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:50,223
No, you're just...
you're just messing with me.
343
00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:52,624
This is just...
this is just anxiety,
344
00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:55,293
a little bit
of coffee... and my EBS.
345
00:13:55,377 --> 00:13:57,355
- Excitable Bowel Syndrome...
- EBS is real, Maisy!
346
00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:58,922
- [Maisy] Is not a thing.
- Look it up!
347
00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,382
[gloud gurgling]
348
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:01,591
Just hold on, just...
349
00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,102
I'm just gonna hold on.
I'm gonna hold it in.
350
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:07,013
That's fine.
I'm fine.
351
00:14:07,097 --> 00:14:09,349
I can swim to shore
in a tight ten.
352
00:14:09,432 --> 00:14:10,725
I'll have
a boat here in five.
353
00:14:10,809 --> 00:14:12,018
You tear up
that trust
354
00:14:12,102 --> 00:14:13,478
and the throne
is yours in 20...
355
00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:15,313
No!
You can't erase me
356
00:14:15,397 --> 00:14:17,399
and you can't
erase Billie...
357
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:20,694
who's the real grandchild
and Dad's trust confirms it.
358
00:14:20,777 --> 00:14:23,196
Blood is thicker
than water.
359
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:25,282
Is that what you tell
Billie's parents?
360
00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:27,242
Ugh! God!
361
00:14:27,325 --> 00:14:29,244
Maisy,
all I am asking for, here,
362
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:30,662
is what's rightfully mine.
363
00:14:30,745 --> 00:14:32,289
- Yours?
- Yes!
364
00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,791
I earned every
square inch of that cottage.
365
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:37,335
I turned this place
from a racist fridge magnet
366
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:38,753
into the next Muskoka.
367
00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:40,672
And I did it
with the entire Lake
368
00:14:40,755 --> 00:14:43,008
thinking that I slept
with my stepdad to get it!
369
00:14:43,091 --> 00:14:45,635
While his sad, gay son
gave up his baby
370
00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:47,429
and his 32 inch waist,
371
00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:49,723
I was being crucified
while you were in Australia
372
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:51,725
getting your micro dick
sucked by a Hemsworth.
373
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:55,270
A Coffs Harbour Hemsworth,
they're not the same.
374
00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:56,980
I have bent
375
00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:59,107
these generational
mouth breathers to my will.
376
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:01,030
And I think it's really
adorable that you think
377
00:15:01,109 --> 00:15:02,962
you can come in here
and take what's rightfully mine
378
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:04,362
just because your granddaddy
379
00:15:04,446 --> 00:15:06,031
built some shit shack
on the Lake.
380
00:15:06,114 --> 00:15:07,616
[sighs]
381
00:15:07,699 --> 00:15:09,868
I am going to tear
that baby to the studs
382
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:12,495
and build an Architectural
Digest centerfold.
383
00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,624
Goldie and Kurt
are gonna lose it.
384
00:15:15,707 --> 00:15:18,168
Well, it sounds
gorge and I can't wait
385
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:20,545
to inherit it when you die
because the only thing
386
00:15:20,629 --> 00:15:23,214
that I'm dissolving
is a Tums in water.
387
00:15:23,298 --> 00:15:24,341
Do you have any?
388
00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:27,636
Do you really think that you
and your excitable bowel
389
00:15:27,719 --> 00:15:28,887
can outlive me?
390
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,098
- I'm younger.
- I'm stronger.
391
00:15:32,182 --> 00:15:33,808
I've had to
shit since we got here
392
00:15:33,892 --> 00:15:35,352
but nobody tells me
what to do.
393
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:36,853
Not even
my own asshole.
394
00:15:37,646 --> 00:15:38,813
- [gurgling]
- Oh no.
395
00:15:39,689 --> 00:15:40,857
Oh, my God.
396
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,400
Oh, my God,
no, it's coming.
397
00:15:42,484 --> 00:15:44,235
Oh, my God, Maisy,
it's coming.
398
00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:46,363
- [Justin panting]
- [Maisy] Then, get in the Lake.
399
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:47,822
[Justin groans passionately]
400
00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:53,870
- Hi! Hi ya, kids.
- Hi.
401
00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:58,208
We... we were on a hike
402
00:15:58,291 --> 00:16:00,168
and I needed
to use the bathroom.
403
00:16:00,251 --> 00:16:02,712
Of course, sweetie,
down the hall.
404
00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:04,506
If it's brown...
405
00:16:04,589 --> 00:16:06,341
- Flush it down.
- [chuckles]
406
00:16:06,424 --> 00:16:08,259
Cool windchime.
407
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,845
It was my mother's
favourite...
408
00:16:10,929 --> 00:16:12,764
before she died
of a broken heart.
409
00:16:13,682 --> 00:16:15,266
And cirrhosis.
410
00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:17,727
How do the colours
do that, though?
411
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:19,020
It looks like
they're dancing.
412
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:20,730
[giggling]
413
00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:23,316
I think you've had
too much sun, dear.
414
00:16:24,234 --> 00:16:25,819
Go and get Billie
something to drink.
415
00:16:25,902 --> 00:16:27,487
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]
416
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:30,699
[panting]
417
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:32,492
I got it. Let's go.
418
00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:33,910
Oh, oh, bye.
419
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,790
Is that my bathrobe?
420
00:16:38,873 --> 00:16:40,667
[teens giggling]
421
00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:43,920
[Wayne] What's up
with this?
422
00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:46,172
Never seen
you here this early.
423
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:50,385
Huh. Uh-oh.
424
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:51,928
Trouble in paradise?
425
00:16:52,011 --> 00:16:53,722
No, no,
it's all good.
426
00:16:53,805 --> 00:16:54,889
You know,
the kids are good.
427
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,517
Maisy's good, but...
428
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:01,229
You ever wish
you could stop time?
429
00:17:02,147 --> 00:17:03,982
It's not a wish, bud,
sunk a boatload
430
00:17:04,065 --> 00:17:05,358
into some
time machine startups.
431
00:17:05,442 --> 00:17:06,651
Just waitin'
to cash in.
432
00:17:07,819 --> 00:17:11,698
It's like... when did
our bodies stop playing fair?
433
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,452
Dude,
we're as young as we feel.
434
00:17:16,703 --> 00:17:18,538
Hey, take your last season.
435
00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:21,040
You weren't scoring.
436
00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:22,584
They cut your ice time.
437
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:25,295
But did you
leave the party?
438
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:26,796
Uh-uh. Yeah.
439
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:28,423
You handled that noise.
440
00:17:28,506 --> 00:17:30,884
That is why
you are Vic-The-Stick.
441
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,510
Yup.
442
00:17:32,594 --> 00:17:35,472
Hey! Who gives a fuck
what people say, anyway?
443
00:17:35,555 --> 00:17:36,639
Most of us.
444
00:17:37,265 --> 00:17:38,600
- [grumbling]
- [Maisy] Oh no,
445
00:17:38,683 --> 00:17:40,602
you are not
pooping on my dock.
446
00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:42,061
Get your ass
in the Lake.
447
00:17:42,145 --> 00:17:43,688
No, I'm a home pooper.
448
00:17:43,772 --> 00:17:46,149
And there's this
tiny Amazonian catfish
449
00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:48,109
that can lodge itself
in your urethra.
450
00:17:48,193 --> 00:17:49,903
You come to my house
451
00:17:49,986 --> 00:17:51,654
and you try
to extort my cottage.
452
00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:54,240
You throw my triple glazed
French mug into the water
453
00:17:54,324 --> 00:17:55,825
and yet
you're the victim.
454
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,368
Justin
is always the victim.
455
00:17:57,452 --> 00:17:59,537
You knew
I was lactose intolerant!
456
00:17:59,621 --> 00:18:01,122
“Oh, I'm gay,
457
00:18:01,206 --> 00:18:03,291
I gave up my baby,
I can't do dairy."
458
00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:05,168
Everybody feel
sorry for Justin.
459
00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:06,461
You know what?
460
00:18:06,544 --> 00:18:07,670
Justin
never does the work.
461
00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:09,339
Like you did?
462
00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:11,633
Sucking up to a racist
homophobe like my dad?
463
00:18:11,716 --> 00:18:13,301
And who
cured him of that?
464
00:18:13,384 --> 00:18:14,594
- Me!
- Yes,
465
00:18:14,677 --> 00:18:16,429
a cis straight
white woman
466
00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:18,593
who's never been affected
by any of that in her life.
467
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,433
And I did it
before I turned 30.
468
00:18:20,517 --> 00:18:22,018
- [groans]
- You know what?
469
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,062
I was really hoping
that when I saw you
470
00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,855
at the boathouse barbecue,
471
00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,374
things would be
different between us.
472
00:18:27,398 --> 00:18:29,234
All I ever wanted
was a big sister.
473
00:18:29,317 --> 00:18:31,528
And all I ever wanted
was to not come second
474
00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,071
to a talking mudslide.
475
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:34,823
[Justin] Oh,
I'll show you a mudslide!
476
00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:37,367
What?
No, no, no! That...
477
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:39,619
Don't you dare.
Don't pull your pants down.
478
00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:41,246
[growls]
479
00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:42,747
That was
hand woven in Marseille.
480
00:18:42,831 --> 00:18:43,998
[Justin grunts]
481
00:18:44,082 --> 00:18:45,416
Oh!
482
00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:48,044
The vibes are weird.
483
00:18:48,878 --> 00:18:50,505
Something's wrong.
484
00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:52,149
[Killian] Who invited
the kids to Quadchella?
485
00:18:52,173 --> 00:18:54,050
Oh no.
They aged backwards.
486
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,427
It's the only
logical explanation.
487
00:18:56,511 --> 00:18:58,513
[gasps]
See, the triplets.
488
00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:00,181
That is what happens
489
00:19:00,265 --> 00:19:01,625
when you appropriate
fairy culture.
490
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:04,143
Oh no...
it's Olive.
491
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:06,688
And Lil Wayne.
492
00:19:06,771 --> 00:19:08,481
[grunts]
493
00:19:09,315 --> 00:19:11,734
We have to
re-bigulate them.
494
00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:19,325
How do we turn you
back, Lil Wayne?
495
00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:20,535
Water!
496
00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:21,870
That's it.
Remember?
497
00:19:21,953 --> 00:19:23,037
Wayne told us.
498
00:19:23,121 --> 00:19:24,747
Water's the answer.
499
00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:26,416
It's always the answer.
500
00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:30,211
We need
to hose 'em down.
501
00:19:30,295 --> 00:19:31,772
We gotta make it fun.
They're just kids.
502
00:19:31,796 --> 00:19:32,964
Water balloons.
503
00:19:35,842 --> 00:19:37,343
[gasps]
504
00:19:37,427 --> 00:19:38,907
This is the sacrifice
we have to make.
505
00:19:38,970 --> 00:19:41,639
♪
506
00:19:43,892 --> 00:19:46,936
So...
question pour Victor...
507
00:19:47,812 --> 00:19:51,065
What do you and Maisers do
when you hit a hump-slump?
508
00:19:51,149 --> 00:19:52,567
Juice cleanse, usually.
509
00:19:56,571 --> 00:19:57,822
So...
510
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,074
the other day...
511
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:02,410
Jayney wants
to play a new game
512
00:20:03,161 --> 00:20:05,455
and I'm like
“I'm here for it babe.
513
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:06,873
- What do you got?”
- Yeah.
514
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,333
- So she ties me up.
- Yeah.
515
00:20:08,416 --> 00:20:10,251
- Gags me.
- Nice.
516
00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:11,586
- Then she leaves.
- Sweet.
517
00:20:11,669 --> 00:20:13,296
Yeah, for,
like, four hours.
518
00:20:13,379 --> 00:20:15,149
- Not so sweet.
- Yeah, she went to run errands.
519
00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:17,717
Like, look, I know
I have to be supportive
520
00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:19,969
but I honestly
did not like that game.
521
00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:23,806
I don't think
it was a game, Wayner.
522
00:20:24,599 --> 00:20:25,892
I think
she wanted some me-time.
523
00:20:26,643 --> 00:20:28,311
Me-time? [burp]
524
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,562
No way.
525
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:32,982
My girl doesn't want
to party with me.
526
00:20:33,066 --> 00:20:34,817
My girls
don't party with me!
527
00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:36,110
I'm still the party.
528
00:20:36,945 --> 00:20:38,029
Nothing's changed.
529
00:20:41,074 --> 00:20:42,909
You spilled some...
530
00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:46,454
Thanks for the advice,
Wayner.
531
00:20:47,038 --> 00:20:49,916
[blows raspberry] Dude,
I'm full of great advice...
532
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:51,834
but does anyone
listen to me?
533
00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:54,504
- Shit. No.
- I can't hear you.
534
00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:57,006
[Wayne] If you see Jayney,
would you tell her to call me?
535
00:20:57,090 --> 00:21:01,094
[kids giggling & shrieking]
536
00:21:01,177 --> 00:21:05,181
♪
537
00:21:06,975 --> 00:21:08,059
We did it.
538
00:21:09,227 --> 00:21:10,645
They're all wet.
539
00:21:10,728 --> 00:21:12,397
They should
re-bigulate any minute.
540
00:21:13,231 --> 00:21:14,565
Yeah.
541
00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:18,111
What the...
542
00:21:19,946 --> 00:21:21,155
Killian.
543
00:21:22,907 --> 00:21:23,992
See?
544
00:21:24,075 --> 00:21:25,868
We had to
re-bigulate them.
545
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:27,578
Quadchella
is two doors up.
546
00:21:30,581 --> 00:21:31,833
Yes, ma'am.
547
00:21:31,916 --> 00:21:34,293
- [giggling]
- Sorry ma'am.
548
00:21:34,377 --> 00:21:36,087
What the fuck?
549
00:21:36,170 --> 00:21:38,756
[intense music]
550
00:21:42,552 --> 00:21:43,636
[grunts] Oh.
551
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:46,139
Oh, God.
552
00:21:48,182 --> 00:21:49,350
- Hey, Dad?
- Hey, son.
553
00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:51,686
Got a minute?
554
00:21:51,769 --> 00:21:53,521
If this is about
the talent show postmortem,
555
00:21:53,604 --> 00:21:54,856
I'm still not ready.
556
00:21:55,606 --> 00:21:57,316
No, that's not
why I'm here.
557
00:22:02,113 --> 00:22:03,156
Oh!
558
00:22:04,115 --> 00:22:05,241
[exhales]
559
00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:08,745
Look, I know your body is
going through some changes...
560
00:22:09,620 --> 00:22:11,039
but I just want
to let you know
561
00:22:11,122 --> 00:22:12,999
that manopause
is perfectly normal.
562
00:22:14,375 --> 00:22:15,793
[quietly] Manopause?
563
00:22:16,711 --> 00:22:17,754
They're one size up.
564
00:22:18,546 --> 00:22:19,964
I'm good.
565
00:22:20,048 --> 00:22:21,442
You know, back on
the intermittent fasting.
566
00:22:21,466 --> 00:22:22,759
- I'm feeling great...
- Stop.
567
00:22:22,842 --> 00:22:24,385
You are not
some sad has-been
568
00:22:24,469 --> 00:22:26,137
clinging
to their golden age.
569
00:22:26,220 --> 00:22:27,513
Now,
embrace the curves.
570
00:22:39,525 --> 00:22:40,985
Oh...
571
00:22:42,445 --> 00:22:44,280
Hm...
572
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:45,490
Hmph.
573
00:22:45,573 --> 00:22:47,158
Oh.
574
00:22:48,284 --> 00:22:49,744
So how do you feel?
575
00:22:50,495 --> 00:22:51,579
They're okay.
576
00:22:52,330 --> 00:22:53,664
Yeah!
577
00:22:53,748 --> 00:22:56,000
I'm... I'm okay.
578
00:22:57,418 --> 00:23:00,797
That's it.
Work it, Daddy. Work!
579
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,215
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
580
00:23:02,298 --> 00:23:04,092
Yeah, I feel good.
Thanks, coach.
581
00:23:04,175 --> 00:23:06,511
Oh, I'm gonna queue up
a Brené Brown playlist.
582
00:23:06,594 --> 00:23:08,234
We shouldn't have
made you go cold turkey.
583
00:23:08,971 --> 00:23:10,681
Thank you, son!
584
00:23:10,765 --> 00:23:12,767
I'm gonna make you proud.
I'm gonna be a new man.
585
00:23:14,977 --> 00:23:16,270
Yes!
586
00:23:18,356 --> 00:23:20,024
This was
a limited run.
587
00:23:20,108 --> 00:23:21,943
You always
ruin everything!
588
00:23:22,026 --> 00:23:24,487
You always ruin everything.
You ruined my family!
589
00:23:24,570 --> 00:23:25,947
You ruined my cottage,
590
00:23:26,030 --> 00:23:27,824
you ruined
my childhood innocence!
591
00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:29,587
God, would you get over that?
We were kids.
592
00:23:29,659 --> 00:23:30,952
You tricked me
593
00:23:31,035 --> 00:23:32,954
into finding our
parents 69-ing.
594
00:23:33,037 --> 00:23:34,497
We were playing Sardines.
595
00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:36,749
You told me
where to look!
596
00:23:36,833 --> 00:23:38,167
Oh, grow up.
597
00:23:38,251 --> 00:23:39,491
They had been
fucking for years.
598
00:23:39,544 --> 00:23:40,962
I was doing you
a favour.
599
00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:42,296
You were
doing me trauma.
600
00:23:42,380 --> 00:23:43,798
I was eight years old.
601
00:23:43,881 --> 00:23:45,383
I didn't know
that my dad was...
602
00:23:45,466 --> 00:23:48,219
- having an affair.
- The entire Lake knew!
603
00:23:48,302 --> 00:23:49,720
What did you think,
that my mom
604
00:23:49,804 --> 00:23:51,848
was some work friend
who was staying
605
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:53,283
- at your cottage for a week?
- Yes!
606
00:23:53,307 --> 00:23:54,600
Because
I was eight, Maisy.
607
00:23:54,684 --> 00:23:56,144
Not Dorothy Fucking Parker!
608
00:23:56,227 --> 00:23:59,021
Oh, you could
never accept reality.
609
00:23:59,105 --> 00:24:00,857
You still live
in a fucking fantasy world!
610
00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:03,109
I always have to have
my shit on lock
611
00:24:03,192 --> 00:24:04,902
but you get to be
an endless shit show.
612
00:24:04,986 --> 00:24:07,363
Maybe that's why you're
such a constipated shrew!
613
00:24:07,446 --> 00:24:08,489
Oh!
614
00:24:08,573 --> 00:24:09,991
You know what?
615
00:24:10,074 --> 00:24:11,701
I don't care
what your dad wanted.
616
00:24:11,784 --> 00:24:13,303
I don't even care
what that document says.
617
00:24:13,327 --> 00:24:14,871
The cottage is mine.
618
00:24:14,954 --> 00:24:17,456
It belongs to my kids
and I will eat shit
619
00:24:17,540 --> 00:24:19,292
before you and Billie
take it from me.
620
00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:21,335
I will come for you.
621
00:24:21,419 --> 00:24:23,504
I will come
for your kids.
622
00:24:23,588 --> 00:24:24,881
And then...
623
00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:29,635
Are you taking
a dramatic pause?
624
00:24:29,719 --> 00:24:31,179
I'm taking
a dramatic shit.
625
00:24:31,888 --> 00:24:33,931
Oh! Oh, God!
626
00:24:35,349 --> 00:24:37,810
Lovejoy wins!
627
00:24:37,894 --> 00:24:39,604
We lost the condom
628
00:24:39,687 --> 00:24:42,440
but we saved
the bathrobe.
629
00:24:42,523 --> 00:24:44,567
[♪ okayceci: "Love Bug"]
630
00:24:44,650 --> 00:24:46,485
So soft.
631
00:24:46,569 --> 00:24:47,653
I know.
632
00:24:48,738 --> 00:24:50,489
Saved something...
633
00:24:51,407 --> 00:24:53,618
♪ On this drive ♪
634
00:24:54,452 --> 00:24:57,205
- [Killian chuckles]
- [Billie giggles]
635
00:24:57,288 --> 00:24:59,707
♪ I just wanna know
How you know ♪
636
00:24:59,790 --> 00:25:01,125
♪ That I love you so ♪
637
00:25:01,209 --> 00:25:02,835
♪ Tell me what you want ♪
638
00:25:02,919 --> 00:25:04,754
[Bille giggling]
639
00:25:05,171 --> 00:25:09,550
♪ If you wanna
We could get... ♪
640
00:25:09,634 --> 00:25:10,801
Is this okay?
641
00:25:11,761 --> 00:25:14,055
- Yes.
- You sure you want to? Yeah?
642
00:25:14,138 --> 00:25:15,932
♪ And if you wanna
we could get crazy ♪
643
00:25:16,015 --> 00:25:17,808
♪ And maybe ♪
644
00:25:17,892 --> 00:25:20,811
♪ Drivin' in your car
Goin' pretty far ♪
645
00:25:21,437 --> 00:25:23,397
Because I'm Justin
and you're Maisy.
646
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:26,025
It all
makes sense now.
647
00:25:26,108 --> 00:25:27,628
Justin and your mom
never got re-bigulated
648
00:25:27,652 --> 00:25:29,070
so they are stuck
in the past
649
00:25:29,153 --> 00:25:30,655
but we can
unstuck them.
650
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:33,991
By having sex?
651
00:25:34,075 --> 00:25:36,994
See, it's all because
your mom stole our cottage.
652
00:25:37,078 --> 00:25:38,704
- Wait, your cottage?
- Yes,
653
00:25:38,788 --> 00:25:40,289
it's in grandpa's will.
654
00:25:40,373 --> 00:25:41,973
That's why Justin and me
have been trying
655
00:25:41,999 --> 00:25:43,501
to steal it back.
656
00:25:43,584 --> 00:25:45,086
- I'm an idiot!
- You've been trying
657
00:25:45,169 --> 00:25:47,004
- to steal our cottage?
- What? No, not me.
658
00:25:47,088 --> 00:25:49,590
Well... [chuckles] sort of.
But only to help you.
659
00:25:50,675 --> 00:25:51,759
I need to sit down.
660
00:25:52,468 --> 00:25:53,928
I am sitting down.
661
00:25:54,011 --> 00:25:55,611
You know,
I wasn't even on board at first
662
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:57,473
but your mom
is kind of a bitch.
663
00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:59,308
She can be a bit harsh,
but she's...
664
00:25:59,392 --> 00:26:00,851
Oh, my God, Killian!
Don't you see?
665
00:26:00,935 --> 00:26:02,395
If we have sex,
666
00:26:02,478 --> 00:26:04,397
we re-bigulate
our family's past,
667
00:26:04,480 --> 00:26:05,982
we bring our parents
back together.
668
00:26:06,816 --> 00:26:08,567
This is what
our grandpa would want
669
00:26:08,651 --> 00:26:09,735
if he were here, today.
670
00:26:10,653 --> 00:26:13,197
Grandpa Derrick wants us
to have sex to save the family?
671
00:26:14,156 --> 00:26:15,241
Exactly.
672
00:26:16,117 --> 00:26:17,410
We have to
fuck for grandpa.
673
00:26:19,328 --> 00:26:20,621
Whoa. Stop!
674
00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:21,914
What's wrong?
675
00:26:21,998 --> 00:26:23,582
You tried
to steal my cottage
676
00:26:23,666 --> 00:26:24,709
and you lied to me.
677
00:26:27,128 --> 00:26:28,838
I'm not
feeling this anymore.
678
00:26:32,341 --> 00:26:33,592
[groans]
679
00:26:37,346 --> 00:26:39,186
[Justin] I feel better now
that I got that out.
680
00:26:39,932 --> 00:26:41,309
[Maisy] The memory
or the turd?
681
00:26:44,812 --> 00:26:46,355
Maisy,
how do we fix this?
682
00:26:46,439 --> 00:26:49,108
We can't, unless we both
get what we want.
683
00:26:49,900 --> 00:26:51,360
Hemsworth threesome?
684
00:26:51,986 --> 00:26:53,529
Oh...
685
00:26:54,739 --> 00:26:56,240
It's not our fault.
686
00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:57,924
We never wanted
to be brother and sister.
687
00:26:59,368 --> 00:27:00,661
I guess
we can get a lawyer.
688
00:27:01,829 --> 00:27:02,913
Or...
689
00:27:03,706 --> 00:27:05,124
We could
solve it like adults.
690
00:27:09,462 --> 00:27:11,088
Sacred blood oath?
691
00:27:11,172 --> 00:27:13,716
- Trial by tilt?
- Next weekend, Tiltapalooza.
692
00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:15,051
If I win...
693
00:27:15,134 --> 00:27:16,469
you buy me out...
694
00:27:16,552 --> 00:27:18,679
and I take
my name off the trust.
695
00:27:18,763 --> 00:27:20,181
And if I win,
you take your name
696
00:27:20,264 --> 00:27:21,599
off the trust
and you walk away.
697
00:27:31,108 --> 00:27:32,401
[bang]
698
00:27:33,444 --> 00:27:34,684
- [cheering]
- Quadchella-works.
699
00:27:34,737 --> 00:27:36,655
[♪ NADUH: "Currency"]
700
00:27:36,739 --> 00:27:39,325
♪ Like wine, I age better
Like a fine cheddar ♪
701
00:27:39,408 --> 00:27:42,078
♪ Know that I'm the shit
But that shit took forever ♪
702
00:27:42,161 --> 00:27:44,997
♪ Now I'm settling
But settling won't ♪
703
00:27:45,081 --> 00:27:47,541
♪ Pass that batshit
For a sedative ♪
704
00:27:47,625 --> 00:27:50,920
♪ No you didn't just slip
Your mom on the phone ♪
705
00:27:53,172 --> 00:27:56,926
♪ If I hear his name, trust
You'll be sleeping alone... ♪
706
00:27:57,009 --> 00:27:59,011
Oh, my God.
707
00:27:59,095 --> 00:28:00,429
[gently] Hey, Miss Carter.
708
00:28:00,513 --> 00:28:01,931
It's Knowles Carter.
709
00:28:02,848 --> 00:28:04,225
Jay-Z was lucky
she gave him that.
710
00:28:04,308 --> 00:28:08,312
♪
711
00:28:09,772 --> 00:28:11,023
Is my bedroom free?
712
00:28:12,024 --> 00:28:13,818
Yeah. Sorry.
713
00:28:15,236 --> 00:28:17,321
It got kind of messy
with Killian.
714
00:28:17,405 --> 00:28:19,990
I'm a squirtter, too.
I'll change the sheets.
715
00:28:20,074 --> 00:28:21,325
What? No.
716
00:28:21,409 --> 00:28:22,493
Not like that.
717
00:28:23,244 --> 00:28:24,662
It's...
718
00:28:25,746 --> 00:28:27,957
- it's over.
- Aw.
719
00:28:29,291 --> 00:28:30,376
We're over.
720
00:28:32,628 --> 00:28:34,422
Cottage parties
are all drama...
721
00:28:35,423 --> 00:28:37,174
but it all works out
in the morning.
722
00:28:40,636 --> 00:28:42,805
But it's probably
for the best.
723
00:28:42,888 --> 00:28:45,599
No one should marry
their first crush at the Lake.
724
00:28:47,852 --> 00:28:48,894
No one.
725
00:28:52,898 --> 00:28:54,191
How'd the viewings go?
726
00:28:57,027 --> 00:28:58,654
Most ran out
screaming...
727
00:28:59,864 --> 00:29:01,949
but it was good
to be back in the saddle.
728
00:29:05,119 --> 00:29:06,412
It sounds crazy...
729
00:29:08,205 --> 00:29:09,790
but the houses
speak to me.
730
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:14,545
They tell me
who they want.
731
00:29:15,421 --> 00:29:17,006
How much
to go above asking.
732
00:29:22,261 --> 00:29:23,554
Do you hear?
733
00:29:25,014 --> 00:29:26,515
They're talking
to me right now.
734
00:29:28,225 --> 00:29:31,770
[wheezing]
735
00:29:35,191 --> 00:29:36,525
Oh, um...
736
00:29:36,609 --> 00:29:39,320
[wheezing & laughing]
737
00:29:40,321 --> 00:29:41,447
[chuckles]
738
00:29:42,656 --> 00:29:43,842
[fireworks exploding
and whistling]
739
00:29:43,866 --> 00:29:47,870
[moving piano instrumental]
740
00:29:47,953 --> 00:29:54,953
♪
741
00:29:55,044 --> 00:29:57,046
♪
742
00:30:03,677 --> 00:30:05,221
Sorry about your bag.
743
00:30:05,846 --> 00:30:07,181
It was really pretty.
744
00:30:08,224 --> 00:30:09,975
Meh.
I got it at Target.
745
00:30:12,228 --> 00:30:13,979
Man, you really
are the worst.
746
00:30:14,063 --> 00:30:15,356
[♪ Nylo: "Life Is A Highway" ♪
747
00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:17,233
♪ Life is a highway ♪
748
00:30:17,316 --> 00:30:20,653
♪ I wanna ride it
All night long ♪
749
00:30:22,821 --> 00:30:25,157
♪ If you're going my way ♪
750
00:30:25,241 --> 00:30:29,036
♪ I wanna drive it
All night long ♪
751
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:38,337
♪ Through all these cities
And all these towns ♪
752
00:30:38,420 --> 00:30:40,506
♪ It's in my blood
And it's all around ♪
753
00:30:40,589 --> 00:30:42,675
♪ I love you now
Like I loved you then ♪
754
00:30:42,758 --> 00:30:44,885
♪ This is the road
And these are the hands ♪
755
00:30:44,969 --> 00:30:46,929
♪ From Mozambique
To Memphis nights ♪
756
00:30:47,012 --> 00:30:49,014
♪ The Khyber Pass
To Vancouver's lights ♪
757
00:30:49,098 --> 00:30:51,308
♪ Knock me down
And back up again ♪
758
00:30:51,392 --> 00:30:53,561
♪ You're in my blood ♪
759
00:30:53,644 --> 00:30:55,813
♪ There's no load
I can't hold ♪
760
00:30:55,896 --> 00:30:58,023
♪ A road so rough
This I know ♪
761
00:30:58,107 --> 00:31:00,025
♪ I'll be there
When the light comes in ♪
762
00:31:00,109 --> 00:31:02,319
♪ Tell them
We're survivors ♪
763
00:31:02,403 --> 00:31:04,572
♪ Life is a highway ♪
764
00:31:04,655 --> 00:31:08,576
♪ I wanna ride it
All night long ♪
765
00:31:10,619 --> 00:31:13,080
♪ If you're going my way ♪
766
00:31:13,163 --> 00:31:14,540
[music fades]
53097
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