All language subtitles for Smiley.S01E02.WEBRip.Netflix.en[cc]

A NETFLIX SERIES

["Las cosas del querer" playing]

[in Spanish] ♪ If your people
Don't love me ♪

♪ And mine don't love you ♪

♪ Because you've gone mad
And I'm completely crazy ♪

♪ If you have no money ♪

♪ And I don't even have two reals ♪

♪ What will we do, my love
With so much money? ♪

♪ Bless the soleá ♪

♪ If we belong to one another
Who'll separate us? ♪

♪ Oh, these are the things of life
These are the things of love ♪

♪ They have no end, no beginning
They have no how, no why ♪

♪ You're tall, I'm short
You're blond, I'm brunette ♪

♪ You're from Seville, the plain… ♪

[in English] Àlex?

Bruno.

[both chuckle]

-Hey.
-Hi.

Oh… Sorry.

-How you doing?
-Good!

-Nice to see you.
-Yeah, likewise.

Very pretty.

-The bar. I mean, the bar… Well, you know.
-Ah, yeah, no…

-[Bruno chuckles]
-[chuckles] Yeah, it is. Um…

-You want a drink?
-Yeah. Yeah, uh…

What kind of beers do you have?

Light, toasted, stout, alcohol-free…

Not alcohol-free.
I hate alcohol-free beer. It's awful.

I'll have just a normal.

-[Bruno] Yeah.
-Mm.

[in Spanish] ♪ If the air you breathe ♪

♪ Is the air I'm breathing ♪

[inaudible]

[Bruno in English] Àlex has
a supernatural magnetism

that makes time freeze around him,

and takes your breath away
if you look at him for too long.

And I've looked at him for far too long.

And I've become petrified
by an undeniable certainty.

I've just fallen in love.

[in Spanish] ♪ They have no end
No beginning ♪

♪ They have no how, no why ♪

[in English] Fall out of it,
because we have a dinner.

No, no. It's just that you should see him.
He's not handsome. No, he's just…

It's insulting that
there are faces like his.

And you think you stand a chance?

Weirder things have happened, okay?

Yeah, but the problem is

that it gets too weird,
and you end up in tears, huh?

Oh, really? Thanks for your support.

Look, trust me this time.

Just please get out of there
before you hurt yourself.

[Àlex] I bet you do.

[in Spanish] ♪ Neither color nor height
Have anything to do with things of love ♪

♪ With things of… love ♪

[spectators cheer]

[in English] Ta-da!

-What do you think? It's cool, huh?
-Sure, if Santa was homeless.

You only say that
because it lacks the final touch.

-Okay.
-Shall we begin?

-Ready?
-[Núria] No, no, no, no, no, no.

-Aim your brushes, and…
-Albert. Albert!

-[Núria] No.
-Fire!

-[Núria] No, no, no, no.
-[Albert groaning]

Ah, I'm dying. [retches]

A tram has run me over.

[gasps] And I will never be able to…
see the Sagrada Família

once it's finished.

-[groans]
-Yeah!

Do you get it?

Now it looks like Santa's a zombie.

[grunts]

This outfit? It's going to be
the best one at the event.

That's great. I'm thrilled.

And, as for the floors,
this is your mess to clean.

[whimsical music plays]

Your father is also
a misunderstood genius. You know that?

Yeah.

[doorbell rings]

[Núria] Hello. How are you?

-[screams]
-[yells]

[door slams]

What happened? What happened?
Why are you screaming?

-There's a girl in the hall.
-Then open the door.

[Núria sighs] Really.

Najat.

Hello. Come in. Come in.

Uh, please excuse before…

This is my husband, Albert.

And don't worry.
He doesn't usually look like this.

Najat is the new sitter.

Oh right. [chuckles]

Great to meet you. I didn't expect…

I mean, I didn't know…
I didn't know you wore…

Well, I wasn't expecting
to meet Antonio Gaudi.

-So I guess, then, we're even.
-[chuckles]

Santa looking zombie, huh?

-[Julia] Mom…
-Najat, please come in.

Let me introduce you to the kids.
They're excited.

And I'll show you around, and…

-[Ramiro] How old is he now?
-[Rosa] 32.

The last time I saw him,
he was only… six or seven.

Seven.

When we lost Juan.

-Exactly.
-Well…

[Ramiro] How is Dolo?
Are you still running the stall together?

She's one you wouldn't recognize.

She's just a grumpy old woman now.

You haven't changed though.

If you're here to make jokes,
then you'd better just leave now.

I'm being serious.

Oh, well. Well, then, thanks.
I wish I could say the same thing.

-[chuckles]
-I don't mean that in a bad way.

You handsome men are just… very lucky.

You look better with age,
but you are getting old, huh?

I'll always be honest.

I've missed that… that frankness.

-[Ramiro chuckles]
-Wouldn't have guessed.

Because it's been 25 years
since you saw me.

[melancholy music plays]

Why are you here, Ramiro?

The ship broke down. They need a few days.

I'll be in Barcelona till then.

Well… I wanted you to hear it from me.

And not hear it over at the market.

Well, that's a nice sentiment.

Puchusky.

-Huh?
-Puchusky. My dog's name is Puchusky.

-Ah…
-Yes.

He's a short-haired
Jack Russell terrier breed, so…

I only say that because
there are also those that are long-haired.

-Mm.
-I adopted him with my ex.

I haven't had a lot of them myself.

But, uh, I suppose
you've had quite a few, yourself.

No, no. I'm allergic.

Ah… No, no, no. Boyfriends, not dogs.

-Boyfriends.
-Ah… [chuckles]

-[Bruno] No, I…
-Mm.

Yeah. I've had three.

Serious relationships, that is.
Like moving-in-together serious.

The first one was with a guy
who was older than me.

When we started, I was 23 and he was 39.

When we're younger we get turned on
by gray hair and beards, right? [chuckles]

But then it's like Sunset Boulevard,
and you're William Holden in the end.

They say there's nothing
love can't overcome,

but… a 16-year difference,
that's impossible.

-Then I moved to New York.
-To New York?

-Yeah.
-Wow. I mean, I'd love to go there.

Yes, it's… it's incredible.
Yeah. [chuckles]

That's where I met Kevin.

-We were together for a year.
-Ah.

But I had to come back.

We did long distance
for a year after that.

-Mm-hmm.
-A bit like that movie, right?

The Parent Trap? [chuckles]

Yeah, right.

-But the original from the '60s.
-Of course.

-Not the one with Lindsay Lohan.
-Right. Yeah.

-The remake is terrible
-Mm. [shudders]

-It was awful, wasn't it?
-[chuckles awkwardly]

Anyway, if I thought
16 years was difficult,

then I found out
it's worse to be 8,000 kilometers apart.

You like cinema?

I love it.

I'm the same. Just love it.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

Um, what have you seen lately
that you really liked?

Um… Frozen.

[stifles laugh]

-[laughs]
-[Álex chuckles]

I thought you were actually serious
for a second.

Uh… No, dude, no.

My third boyfriend was
really into making jokes like that.

-[Álex chuckles] Sure.
-That was a good one.

Jaume, phew.

With Jaume it seemed like it would work,
but there was only one problem.

He's an architect also.

-You're an architect?
-Yes.

-Wow.
-Yeah…

But things with us…
Well, we understood each other perfectly.

-But, well, it was always about our work.
-Ah, yeah.

All of our discussions ended up
being about Zaha Hadid.

-Do you know her?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah…

[Javi] Control yourselves…

-Huh?
-Zaha Hadid.

-[Javi] Now, you, there in the corner…
-Ah, yes. I'm sorry. I just misheard you.

-Really?
-I love her work.

-Yeah, me too. It's… She's unbelievable.
-Wow.

Yeah, I just… Wow.

[both chuckle]

It's incredible, isn't it?

How she can integrate
such innovative volumes

in her environment so organically?

I say the same thing,
when they ask me about Zah… um…

I say the volumes are organic.

Exactly, that's right…

And what other architects do you like?

Uh… Well, um…

-[doorbell jingles]
-Look…

[Javi] Anyway, speaking of secrets…

-Would you give me a minute?
-Of course. No, please, uh…

-Do what you have to.
-Sorry, it's just…

-Yeah, sure, of course.
-Okay.

[Javi] Darlings, listen up…

Hey. What took you so long?
Everything okay?

Look, Patri's pissed. Rightly so.

Well, if you need to go,
I've got this handled.

No, it's crowded.

Well, I'll ask Javi for help
after the show.

No. He won't be able to because I'm gonna
strangle him once he gets off that stage.

Stop. Mm-hmm.

-[Javi] It's true, though.
-[spectators laugh]

What about your date?

-[Javi continues performing]
-Uh…

-Well, I don't think it will really last.
-Yeah. He's not your type.

No, at first I thought the same thing,

but the more I learn,
the more I'm interested.

-So what's the problem?
-He doesn't stop talking.

Ah. He doesn't listen?

No, no. I don't have anything to say.

Bring up something
you're passionate about.

-Like what?
-Do I need to tell you?

-[Javi laughs]
-[spectators applaud]

-Go on.
-[Javi] Can you believe it?

I bared my soul to her.

And, bitch, it was somebody else!

[laughing]

Oh, thanks, guys.

Thank you. I mean it. Thank you so much.

And remember,

nobody can tell you what you have to be
or what you need to feel.

And, if anyone tries to,
then what is your response?

[spectators] Keena Mandrah!

Of course. Keena Mandrah. "How boring!"

Ah. I'm going to go powder my nose,
but I'll see you all for the second half.

Don't wander off too far
like Cala Calobra, who loves the bathroom.

And get more drinks, bitches.

[spectators cheer]

[sighs]

-My feet.
-[door opens]

What the fuck is wrong with you?
What just happened?

Hey, honey, I just apologized to you.
And in public too, like a real artist.

Javi, nobody knew about the offer,
not even Patri.

[exclaims]

Oh, I'm sorry.

Why didn't you warn me?

How could I warn you?

As soon as I told you,
you started screeching like a piglet.

You want me to take the blame
for you fighting?

Well, yeah, I blame you.

Because you can't just go out on stage
and talk about people's lives like that.

I'm sorry but actually 50% of my show
consists of exactly that, okay?

-I am not one of your fans.
-Of course you are!

Look. I'm being serious, Javi.

Oh, you want me to get serious?

Very well, then. Sure, let's get serious.

I'll start us off.

The problem here is not
that I publicly announced

to your girlfriend
that you were going to Ibiza.

The problem is that
you haven't told your girlfriend yet

that you were going to Ibiza
when you've known about it.

I was waiting for the right time.

Well, the right time is here and now.

So you can thank me.

That's not how you handle it.
It's something too important to just go--

[sighs] If it's so important
to you, honey, then,

Vero, what the hell
are you still doing here?

Why aren't you with Patri
trying to fix things right now?

[Rosa] Fix what exactly?

Your retirement. You can retire soon.

There's nothing to fix.

[scoffs] I've been working there
since I was 15 years old.

They'll only get me out
once I'm pushing daisies.

[Ramiro chuckles]

But enough about me, what about you?

I'm not the one with an adventurous life.

You've traveled all over the world.

And I'm sure you have
thousands of exciting stories.

A new romance in each port.

[sighs]

You must have had
a lot of admirers yourself.

Oh, no way.

Not a single one. Not since Juan passed.

-I don't believe you.
-[chuckles]

I'm not saying I was a nun.

But nothing got serious.

I couldn't imagine life
if it wasn't with Juan.

That's normal.

The person you love leaves,
but the love… remains with you.

[melancholy music plays]

[Ramiro] You think that
with time it will fade, but it doesn't.

It clings to you with the same strength
as the day it started.

Until the day comes when…

[chuckles] …you don't know
what to do with it.

[gulls squawking]

[Rosa] Ramiro,

have you been happy all these years?

I have.

Really happy.

Why don't you go… and set the table?

The tablecloth is in the top drawer
of that cabinet over there.

[Bruno] I mean,
you see everything, really.

Well, you know, there are so many
profiles out there, it's overwhelming.

But then there are these architects
who are paid millions of dollars,

but their buildings fall down
after two days.

Those are the worst ones.

In the studio, do you know
what we call them? "The Crookitechts."

-You get it? It's--
-What gym do you train at?

-Uh, what?
-Well, I go to the Metropolitan.

But now I've just signed up for the Club
Natació Barceloneta 'cause of the pools.

I mean, their workout room sucks,
but it has private beach access.

And you have no idea how cool it is

to finish a workout and jump
straight into the ocean. [chuckles]

[chuckles nervously]

-Um… You go to two gyms?
-Yeah. But they're affordable, actually.

And, besides, the deltoid machines over
at the Metropolitan are so much better.

I mean, you should see
the machines they have at the Barceloneta.

I mean, it's embarrassing.

All of my friends think
that we need to just

write a letter and complain about it.

I mean, you can't have
three calf machines…

Three! And not be able
to train your shoulders, right?

-It's unacceptable… Intoler--
-Right! Intolerable.

-[Àlex] And that can't be allowed.
-No. No, no, no.

[both chuckle]

-Do you go every day? Uh…
-No, man, no.

-No? Uh…
-No, no. Sundays I don't.

Do you spend long hours?

-Well…
-No. A few, max!

Oh.

-I'm not obsessed like that.
-Oh, yeah.

[both chuckle]

But now that summer is coming,
maybe I'll do CrossFit.

-Ah, it's still just December…
-Yeah, yeah.

But it's never too late to begin.

And, besides, now we have New Year's Eve
and Carnival parties coming soon…

[Bruno] Hmm.

So you don't do it for yourself?

What are you saying?

Well, you spend the week working out
just to show your abs at a party?

Wait a minute.
I work out because I like it.

And it makes me feel good. So what?

But if I'm at a party, and I wanna
take my shirt off or something,

I can, right?

Hmm.

[Àlex chuckles]

Uh, where's the bathroom? Is it…

The bathroom is in… the rear.

Oh, okay. I'm, uh…

[both chuckle]

[chuckles, exhales deeply]

The guy is dumb… a real idiot.

He's a bartender. Come on.

How many times have I said no bartenders?

No bartenders and no actors.

How many?
I mean, you can't sink any lower.

[grunts, sighs]
Weren't you so in love though?

-I mean, he's really hot.
-[chuckles]

He's very hot. But he's… a walking cliché.

Like Queen Mother of gays.

[chuckles] Oh, hey. Does that mean
you're coming to dinner, then?

Yes. Yeah, anything but this.

-Yes!
-But no costume.

No, no, no, no.
Bruno, Just grab something on the way.

What are you saying?
Everything's closed already.

-I'm not--
-I'll bring one.

Yeah, I have my daughter's angel wings.

Just wrap a sheet into a tunic,
and you're good.

Yeah? And what am I supposed to be?

-Are you kidding right now?
-Perfect.

Daedalus, who built
the labyrinth of the Minotaur.

Yes, I know who Daedalus is.

Great. Well, just get yourself
to the restaurant,

and I'll take care of the rest.

-Okay, yeah.
-Okay, Bruno.

-See ya in a bit.
-Okay.

[clears throat] Oh, hey.
Be careful on the way.

Why?

Don't get too close to the sun.
You know how it ended for Icarus.

-Ugh, you're such a pain. Really.
-[laughs]

Huh. Call dropped.

-Can you start Tuesday, next week?
-Um, yeah.

The problem is picking the kids up
from school.

'Cause, when Albert can't go get them,
I normally go, but…

Yeah, well, I'm going to be
at the restaurant.

All good things have to end.

I'm thrilled to have a job again.

-[chuckles] Really.
-[chuckles]

It'll just be the night shift, so Albert
can have the kids during the day.

-Okay.
-[Albert] But use "them."

-Albert, don't start with that. Come on.
-No, we've talked about it, Núria.

-And we said there's no need.
-Yes, there absolutely is a need.

Just 'cause Ariel has a penis
doesn't necessarily mean they're a boy.

So, until they express
their sense of gender,

we prefer to continue with "they."

Albert prefers it.

All of a sudden, he wants
to be the most progressive parent.

But, look, use whatever's easiest.

-But keep it neutral if you can, yeah?
-[Núria sighs]

-Honestly, I might forget that.
-Sure.

But it's really easy.
Look, let me give you an example.

"They, they."

"They are awake already."
Always use "they."

Except in Catalan, huh?
In Catalan we'd add an "I".

-Do you speak Catalan?
-Albert, no more.

I don't want to perpetuate
gender stereotypes.

We never did it with Artur or Julia,
and they're just fine, all right?

And, one day, if one of them
turns out to be trans,

we'll help them however we can.

-[phone rings]
-All right?

-Sorry. Excuse me for just a moment.
-[Najat] Yeah, sure.

[Núria] Yes, hello.

Oh my God. Is it bad?

[lively music plays]

-Najat, isn't it?
-Yeah.

Where you from?

Here.

Yes, of course.
I only meant, uh, which neighborhood--

Look, I know what you meant.

So progressive
and yet still so old-fashioned.

[Núria] Right, yes. Yes, I understand.

Okay, don't worry. I'll be right there.

Yes, I'll tell Albert,
and I'll see you soon.

[clears throat]

It was work.

The chef has had an accident,
and I have to cover her.

You have to cancel the dinner.

[lively music plays]

You know your cousin Maria Elena
just had her second boy.

He's so ugly.

-Don't exaggerate.
-No, I'm not.

Show her a photo.
He looks like he belongs in a zoo.

That's not fair. Come on.

[woman gasps] You'll never guess
who broke up.

I said it on the day of their wedding,
didn't I?

It would end in a flash.

Didn't I tell you?

-But they've been together for ten years.
-[scoffs]

Your Marco Antonio, my love.

-[woman] Great news, huh?
-Why is it great?

I mean now you're both single. Am I wrong?

Stop it, Mom. That's all done.

But why? Do you have a little boyfriend?

-Marco's thinking of going to Spain.
-No. Mom…

-And you were such a nice couple.
-Please let it go. All right?

-All right, you're being a pain.
-Okay, relax.

-Calm down.
-[door opens, closes]

What a temper this girl has!

-Mom, I have to go now.
-But we have a surprise for you.

-Wait, don't tell her now.
-It's-- Why not?

I can't talk. All right?

-[blows kiss] Ciao.
-[woman] No. Wait, Patri…

-[Patri sighs]
-Hello.

How long did you know, then?

We had just gotten the apartment,
and we were renovating the place.

I didn't think I'd be selected.

There were other candidates.
It wasn't just me.

But you were chosen,
and you didn't say anything.

I didn't know how to tell you, Patri.

-You were so happy about the apartment I--
-Of course I was happy.

But you know what I would have loved
even more, Vero?

Knowing that my girlfriend got the job
of her absolute dreams

and was accepting the offer.

And to be able to celebrate that together.

Because I would have been happy for you.
Or do you really think that I wouldn't?

I don't know. I don't know.

Did you really think I'd hold you back?

-Me?
-[somber music plays]

You don't know me at all, do you?

I spent five months
organizing this dinner. Five!

I planned this before Ariel was even born.

I know. What do you want me to do?

They lost the chef
in the middle of a rush.

You're still on leave.
They can't force you.

I want to go. I'm not being forced.

It doesn't matter. It's illegal.
They can't even ask you.

I'm starting on Tuesday, and I'm sure
you understand not wanting to disappoint.

You'd rather disappoint me.

It's just a dinner,
not the end of the world.

This isn't just some dinner, Núria.

I mean, people are coming
from out of town just for this.

I might never see any of them again.
It's been 15 years.

Don't be so dramatic.

Easy for you to say.
Your plans aren't being ruined.

-What did you say?
-It's true.

-Look, I've had to give up plenty.
-Is that so?

More than you.
More important than a shitty dinner.

It's not my fault that you're bitter.

-What?
-Because that's what makes you happy.

Knowing I don't get to have fun.
Not even for one day. One fucking day!

Albert, you can go parachuting
for all I care.

-But not today. Get it?
-[knocking]

[both shout] What is it?

You're arguing really loud.

-But can the kids hear?
-[sighs]

They're in the kitchen.

Um… [clears throat]
I'm free to stay with them.

No, no. Najat, we can't impose--

No, no, no. Núria, she said
she's free, right? Didn't you, Najat?

It's really no problem.

So there we go!

[Núria] Hmm.

Well, thanks.

-[Albert] Yeah.
-[Núria] I'll tell the kids.

-[Najat] Bye.
-[Albert chuckles]

[giggles, exclaims]

[clears throat, steadies breath]

I owe you one, Najat.

'Kay.

[pop music plays]

Sorry.

Sorry.

Well…

Did you go see Dua Lipa?

Uh… Uh-uh.

Her concert was sold out,
but my ex was able to get me in as a VIP.

Ah, well, that's great.

[chuckles nervously]

You don't go out much, do you?

Yes, but I feel more comfortable
in different bars.

Oh. Like where?

Like… Well, let me think…

La Federica, for example, in Poble Sec.

Mm… Don't know it.

-I don't think you would like it.
-Yeah? Why?

Well, it's not like this. It's different.

Well, different in what way?

It's just a bit more… more alternative.
Not so much posing.

-Posing?
-Yeah. Well, you know what I mean.

[scoffs] You're saying
the guys at my bar are posing?

-No…
-That they're fake?

-No. I didn't say that.
-So what are you saying?

No, I mean, the type of clients here
are different. It makes sense, though.

Oh yeah? Yeah, they love posing 'cause
they think they're better than everyone.

-No, no, no.
-Tell me about your bar.

I wasn't saying that.
I didn't mean to upset you.

I'm not upset.

-You love posing.
-Then tell me.

Fuck, nobody there looks down on you

if you don't look like
you've overdosed on clenbuterol.

Doesn't matter if you have crooked teeth,
or you're straight out of a Bel Ami movie.

-Àlex.
-[shouts] What?

-Oh, sorry. Sorry, uh… I'm sorry.
-Uh, I'm gonna go.

Why not stay for a while.

I'll see you another day
when you're not so… busy.

-When you have more time.
-Mm-hmm.

[Ibra] Mm.

[chuckles]

Call me, okay?

He can stay, 'cause I'm going.
It's clear he's more your type.

What makes you think that?

Answer me honestly, Álex. Okay?

If you'd seen my photo on Instagram
or anywhere, would you have met me?

-Hm?
-Well, why not?

Because guys like you
never date guys like me.

Even if that were true,
haven't you ever wondered why that is?

Well, it's clear. You're only interested
in a guy's physique.

-Did anyone tell you that?
-No…

-Did anyone say you're ugly.
-There's no--

-Or not hot enough?
-That's not the point.

Because they didn't.

-Okay.
-That's it, though.

Meanwhile, you spend your life
thinking people look down on you

and aren't interested,
which is why you end up

sitting by yourself, looking bitter,

and that's why no one
would ever approach you to say hello.

No one would anyway, regardless.

Not with that attitude, Bruno.

And what should I do?
No, no, no. I wanna know.

-Should I always be smiling? No?
-[chuckles] Okay.

To ask questions
that are vapid and stupid?

You know, "Are you going to Mykonos
or to Ibiza?"

-Come on…
-No, wait.

Should we talk about Eurovision
or RuPaul's Drag Race?

It's better than black and white films
from the '70s.

They'd been shooting in color
for three decades by the '70s, Álex!

Well, whatever. The point is
that no one likes snobbish assholes.

-I'm not snobbish.
-Bruno, please. I like movies too.

But I don't take every chance that I get
to recite a list of my favorite directors.

Yeah, because you don't even have one.

Now you're insulting me?
What is your problem?

Oof.

This began with you.

[breathes deeply]

[both laughing]

[sighs]

-You know what I don't get?
-Ah, Jesus…

Guys like you always criticize
guys like me,

when, really though,
the only thing you want is to be like us.

No, no. I don't wanna be like you.

-But you want to fuck me.
-Jesus!

No. It's what went through your mind
the second that you saw me.

But, since you assumed
that I'm not interested,

you got defensive
and started attacking me.

That's not it.

I need more than a gym body
to make out with some guy.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah.

Okay, wait a minute. Hold on.

Okay, you're right.

I'll be honest.

If I'd seen a photo of you
after we talked,

I… probably would've said no.

And that's because… that's because
I normally go for other guys.

-Right. You see? That's what I was--
-Wait.

-But… But…
-Right. Yeah.

I swear, when we were in there, I thought,

"Look, this guy is super intelligent.
He's interesting."

"You could really learn a lot from him."

[wistful music plays]

You don't need to try and save face, okay?

Believe me. I was super attracted to you.

Only you blew it
the second you started insulting me.

You're just saying that.

Look, that's it.

Think what you want. I don't care.

[scoffs]

[pop music plays]

[Bruno] No.

You weren't ever attracted to me.

You're just saying that now

to make yourself look like
the good guy in the movie.

I thought I'd fuck you one time.

You would never fuck a guy like me.

You want me to prove it?

No.

-Thanks.
-[laughs] You'd love it.

-Yeah, I'd rather have my dick cut off.
-Right, sure.

You know what your problem is?

That you're mad that a bro like me
can make your dick hard.

But deep down
you're dying to see me naked.

And to suck my dick.

And then play with my ass
for a while, right?

I love getting fucked.

And, if you want, I can fuck you too.

I'm versatile.

But I think

it would turn me on to get fucked by you.

[Álex clicks teeth]

But, of course, first we'd have to see
if you're able to. Right?

Wait, what?

Well, I know I'm a little intimidating.

And it wouldn't be the first time…
that someone got too nervous.

Hmm?

[sighs]

[playful music plays]

[cell phone buzzing]

[buzzing stops]

[electronic dance music plays]

Hey, you can't be in here!

Look, pretty face.

You must be used to all those
"homuscle-sexuals" eating from your hand.

-But I won't.
-That so?

It's just that you think,

because you have abs and are pretty,
you're better than the rest of us.

Blah, blah, blah…

-And you're no match for me in bed.
-Mmm.

If I don't kiss you,
it's because I don't feel like it.

Mm-hmm.

-Yes, a very mature attitude. That's it.
-Blah, blah, blah…

-Uh-huh. That's all. Yeah. That's all.
-Okay. Right. Yeah.

[music intensifies]

[spectators chanting] Keena, Keena, Keena…

[spectators cheering]

[sighs]

The next song that I have for you
is very special.

It was requested by Adán and Yago.

It was playing at the disco
the day they kissed for the first time.

They played it on their wedding day,
and I'm playing it in here now,

as they are celebrating 30 years together.

A round of applause. I love you!

[spectators cheer and applaud]

[Javi] Oh, love.

Love exists, bitches.

Life will try to convince us otherwise.

But don't listen. Love is there.

Listen to Keena.

Love is there.
It's out there in places, just waiting.

["Yo no te pido la luna"
by Daniela Romo plays]

[Javi] And, if you're lucky enough
to find it,

don't screw it up.

Take care of it.

Water it, nurture it, as if it were
the most delicate and rare kind of plant.

Because, if not, you run the risk
of it withering forever.

We should not ask ourselves
why love comes into our life, no.

[imperceptible]

We must grab it when we see it,

firmly, so that it doesn't leave us.

Sometimes it's hard to identify it,
but… be attentive.

Because any moment could be
the start of something incredible.

The moment… that you get your wings,
and you remember how to fly once more.

[song continues]

[both moaning]

[song continues]

[song fades out]

[wistful music plays]